• Menu
  • Skip to primary navigation
  • Skip to main content
  • Skip to primary sidebar

Before Header

  • About Us
  • Lexicon
  • Contact Us
  • Our Store
  • ↑
  • ↓
  • ←
  • →

Balloon Juice

Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

A democracy can’t function when people can’t distinguish facts from lies.

Meanwhile over at truth Social, the former president is busy confessing to crimes.

Perhaps you mistook them for somebody who gives a damn.

You don’t get rid of your umbrella while it’s still raining.

Not all heroes wear capes.

That’s my take and I am available for criticism at this time.

Infrastructure week. at last.

Speaking of republicans, is there a way for a political party to declare intellectual bankruptcy?

I was promised a recession.

Some judge needs to shut this circus down soon.

The revolution will be supervised.

Since when do we limit our critiques to things we could do better ourselves?

A snarling mass of vitriolic jackals

We still have time to mess this up!

Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

Reality always lies in wait for … Democrats.

“Jesus paying for the sins of everyone is an insult to those who paid for their own sins.”

Black Jesus loves a paper trail.

They fucked up the fucking up of the fuckup!

Republicans in disarray!

JFC, are there no editors left at that goddamn rag?

When someone says they “love freedom”, rest assured they don’t mean yours.

The republican caucus is already covering themselves with something, and it’s not glory.

When your entire life is steeped in white supremacy, equality feels like discrimination.

Mobile Menu

  • Winnable House Races
  • Donate with Venmo, Zelle & PayPal
  • Site Feedback
  • War in Ukraine
  • Submit Photos to On the Road
  • Politics
  • On The Road
  • Open Threads
  • Topics
  • Balloon Juice 2023 Pet Calendar (coming soon)
  • COVID-19 Coronavirus
  • Authors
  • About Us
  • Contact Us
  • Lexicon
  • Our Store
  • Politics
  • Open Threads
  • War in Ukraine
  • Garden Chats
  • On The Road
  • 2021-22 Fundraising!
You are here: Home / Politics / America / The Trials of Snack Team Six: The Contemptening

The Trials of Snack Team Six: The Contemptening

by Adam L Silverman|  September 23, 20168:40 pm| 149 Comments

This post is in: America, Ammosexuals, Domestic Politics, domestic terrorists, Gun nuts, Open Threads, Clown Shoes

FacebookTweetEmail

Slide1

When last we left our intrepid heroes they were attempting to impeach, post facto, the credibility of Harney County Sheriff Dave Ward. In our most recent installment, however, Ammon Bundy’s attorney has decided that what this trial needs is more references to the late LaVoy Finicum! Maxine Berstein, doing yeoman’s (yeowoman? yeoperson?) at The Oregonian, has the details:

U.S. District Judge Anna J. Brown on Thursday threatened to hold Ammon Bundy’s lawyer in contempt of court each time he defies her order and tries to delve into the circumstances surrounding the officer-involved fatal shooting of refuge occupation spokesman Robert “LaVoy” Finicum during trial.

The judge told attorney Marcus Mumford that she’d fine him $1,000 each time he raises the issue in front of jurors in the federal conspiracy trial of Bundy and six others stemming from the 41-day takeover of the Malheur National Wildlife Refuge.

“I have ruled on this issue and it appears to me you disregard it,” Brown told Mumford after excusing the jury for a morning restroom break.

“Do you understand what I’m saying … yes or no?” the judge asked Mumford as he was about to explain. She cut him off, requesting a simple answer, just as he’s done to witnesses on the stand.

“I don’t understand. Your honor says I’m asking improper questions?” Mumford said.

The judge pointed to Mumford’s questioning of rancher Andy Dunbar, whose property is adjacent to the eastern Oregon refuge, about what he learned on Jan. 26 about the fatal shooting of Finicum.

“You are not to do that,” Brown said.

“You’re telling me I’m allowed to inquire about the shooting, but not the circumstances of the shooting?” Mumford asked.

Brown reminded him: Anything about Finicum’s shooting death, beyond that it occurred and the date, isn’t allowed to be discussed in front of jurors.

“I can understand the words,” Mumford told her.

“I hope you can comply,” the judge said.

The admonition followed days of directions by the judge to Mumford about restricting his questions during cross-examination to the testimony elicited during prosecutors’ direct examination of witnesses. She has frequently sustained prosecutors’ objections to Mumford’s lines of questioning because they were either irrelevant or “beyond the scope” of the direct testimony during the past two weeks of trial.

The judge instructed Mumford and all other attorneys to take any concerns up with her outside the presence of the jury if they want to ask questions that go beyond her order.

Tune back in on Monday for our next installment of How the Snack Team Digests. Same Bundy time, same Bundy station!

FacebookTweetEmail
Previous Post: « Cat Bleg: Foster Home Needed, Reading PA Area
Next Post: Open Thread: Trump’s Other Putin-Sponsored Adviser »

Reader Interactions

149Comments

  1. 1.

    Steve in the ATL

    September 23, 2016 at 8:45 pm

    Really stupid people have really stupid lawyer.

    The math checks out.

  2. 2.

    Omnes Omnibus

    September 23, 2016 at 8:46 pm

    “I can understand the words,” Mumford told her.

    I am dying here. He’s like an evil Lionel Hutz.

  3. 3.

    redshirt

    September 23, 2016 at 8:46 pm

    TPM! CNN! FOX!

  4. 4.

    Adam L Silverman

    September 23, 2016 at 8:47 pm

    @Omnes Omnibus: I figured that would get you giggling.

  5. 5.

    Villago Delenda Est

    September 23, 2016 at 8:48 pm

    I’m thinking Mumford needs a spanking. With no oral sex afterwards.

  6. 6.

    geg6

    September 23, 2016 at 8:48 pm

    These clowns have the clowniest lawyer ever. I just love this shit. Comedy gold, these guys.

  7. 7.

    LAO

    September 23, 2016 at 8:50 pm

    A retired lawyer, who is attending the trial, has been posting her impressions at fogbow. She’s amazingly insightful.

  8. 8.

    Omnes Omnibus

    September 23, 2016 at 8:50 pm

    “You’re telling me I’m allowed to inquire about the shooting, but not the circumstances of the shooting?” Mumford asked.

    Huh? I mean… What the? I’ll be in the bar.

  9. 9.

    LAO

    September 23, 2016 at 8:52 pm

    @Omnes Omnibus: apparently, he is the world’s worst cross examiner, a skill that is required to be an adequate defense attorney.

  10. 10.

    p.a.

    September 23, 2016 at 8:53 pm

    Don’t follow this, but is the lawyer a true believer or just playing to his clients’ dumb beliefs?

  11. 11.

    Felonius Monk

    September 23, 2016 at 8:53 pm

    Snack Team Six — THE EXECUTION

  12. 12.

    JPL

    September 23, 2016 at 8:53 pm

    Adam, What did you think about Michael Isikoff’s article at yahoo about Carter Page? If it is true, what charges should he face? link

  13. 13.

    Mnemosyne

    September 23, 2016 at 8:55 pm

    @Omnes Omnibus:

    Hey, Lionel Hutz knew when to quit.

  14. 14.

    opiejeanne

    September 23, 2016 at 8:55 pm

    @Omnes Omnibus: I don’t know who Lionel is, but that line sounds like he’s still disrespecting the judge.

    She warned Mumford that each and every instance disallowed reference to Tinicum’s death would cost him $1000. Then she warned both sides, but the prosecution isn’t likely to bring it up.

  15. 15.

    opiejeanne

    September 23, 2016 at 8:56 pm

    @p.a.: True believer. That’s part of why he’s so obtuse. Also, stupid.

  16. 16.

    Mnemosyne

    September 23, 2016 at 8:57 pm

    Also, I’m still pretty sure this guy’s name is not Marcus Mumford. At a minimum, it ain’t what his parents named him.

  17. 17.

    opiejeanne

    September 23, 2016 at 8:58 pm

    @Mnemosyne: Thanks. I didn’t know that character or reference.

  18. 18.

    Adam L Silverman

    September 23, 2016 at 8:59 pm

    @JPL: I’ve seen it and other reporting about his reporting. I’m not a lawyer, but depending on what the Counter-Intelligence investigation turns up it could be one of the first righteous prosecutions under the Espionage Act, but this may be a stretch. There may also be a treason charge in there, though given we’re not officially at war with Russia (regardless of what Putin may think and say), that is probably harder. There’s also probably several laws in regard to private citizens trying to carry on foreign policy. You’ll need to check with the resident lawyers here. The bigger issue is going to be is where the CI investigation leads in terms of whether they turn up Page acting of his own accord or if this is more tightly tied to the campaign. My guess is it would almost have to be the latter, but proving it, especially if Page is willing to take the fall, will be difficult.

  19. 19.

    Omnes Omnibus

    September 23, 2016 at 8:59 pm

    @Mnemosyne: I was thinking of this iconic scene.

  20. 20.

    Mnemosyne

    September 23, 2016 at 9:00 pm

    @opiejeanne:

    Voiced by the late, great Phil Hartman, they had to drop the character from the show after his murder. ?

  21. 21.

    opiejeanne

    September 23, 2016 at 9:00 pm

    @efgoldman: He’s been skating on thin ice, hinting to the jury, suggesting jury nullification. He made a speech today that included some phrases the ‘Bundy Bunch hold dear as a “get out of jail’ card.

  22. 22.

    opiejeanne

    September 23, 2016 at 9:01 pm

    @Mnemosyne: I loved Phil Hartmann. His death was tragic.

  23. 23.

    JPL

    September 23, 2016 at 9:02 pm

    @Adam L Silverman: Hopefully, Hillary addresses it on Monday night. Trump turned down an invite to meet with the President of Ukraine, also.

  24. 24.

    Mnemosyne

    September 23, 2016 at 9:03 pm

    @Omnes Omnibus:

    So many to choose from.

  25. 25.

    Major Major Major Major

    September 23, 2016 at 9:08 pm

    “Mister Hutz, do you have any ACTUAL evidence?”
    “We have lots of hearsay and conjecture, those are KINDS of evidence…”

  26. 26.

    Steeplejack

    September 23, 2016 at 9:09 pm

    @Mnemosyne:

    Bobby Troup alert on Perry Mason Monday night (11:30 p.m. EDT on MeTV). Pretty good episode: “The Case of the Jaded Joker” (1959). Frankie Laine as a Sid Caesar-like TV comedian, Troup as the stoner beatnik in his entourage. Also Martha Vickers (Carmen Sternwood from The Big Sleep).

  27. 27.

    Adam L Silverman

    September 23, 2016 at 9:11 pm

    @efgoldman: Ultra-devout, ultra-Zionist Jewish settlers. Mostly originally from NY, NJ, and Miami. A lot of them maintain dual citizenship. The hope among the Trump campaign seems to be that he can get them all to submit absentee ballots and that they’ll all vote for him if they do.

  28. 28.

    Adam L Silverman

    September 23, 2016 at 9:11 pm

    @efgoldman: You got it in the right one.

  29. 29.

    Dmbeaster

    September 23, 2016 at 9:12 pm

    The lawyer is purposefully skewing the case political for whatever benefits may accrue, including making his clients happy. But the home run is juror nullification. This kind of intentional obfuscation has a long history in trials. One of my favorite examples is the Manson lawyer who objected to everything, including a question asking a witness when they were born based on hearsay.

  30. 30.

    Omnes Omnibus

    September 23, 2016 at 9:13 pm

    @efgoldman: You are making that up.

  31. 31.

    Villago Delenda Est

    September 23, 2016 at 9:13 pm

    @efgoldman: He.Is.Not.Sane.

  32. 32.

    redshirt

    September 23, 2016 at 9:15 pm

    @Major Major Major Major: No! Money down!

  33. 33.

    Major Major Major Major

    September 23, 2016 at 9:15 pm

    @Adam L Silverman: well, if that’s his plan for winning Florida then I’m a little more optimistic about Hillary’s chances.

  34. 34.

    p.a.

    September 23, 2016 at 9:18 pm

    The primary mental image I’m getting for Trump, the Bundys (damnit Peg!), and now the lawyer is Richard Mulligan in Soap, snapping his fingers beside his head, claiming “I’m invisible!”

  35. 35.

    Adam L Silverman

    September 23, 2016 at 9:19 pm

    @efgoldman: 1) Hope is not a strategy and 2) I never said it was smart and/or logical.

  36. 36.

    p.a.

    September 23, 2016 at 9:21 pm

    @Major Major Major Major: @efgoldman:
    offices in (((Israel))). Donnie boldly challenging his base I guess.

  37. 37.

    Omnes Omnibus

    September 23, 2016 at 9:21 pm

    @efgoldman: I’ll head back to the bar.

  38. 38.

    SiubhanDuinne

    September 23, 2016 at 9:22 pm

    @efgoldman:

    Huh, no, that couldn’t possibly be, I mean, I can’t even.

  39. 39.

    Major Major Major Major

    September 23, 2016 at 9:24 pm

    @p.a.: and what’s his angle? Hillary is insufficiently pro-Israel? Because that’s risible. I mean, he hates Muslims sure but does that really sell there?

  40. 40.

    SiubhanDuinne

    September 23, 2016 at 9:25 pm

    @Omnes Omnibus:

    You are making that up.

    @efgoldman:

    No, I am not making this up.

  41. 41.

    hovercraft

    September 23, 2016 at 9:26 pm

    @efgoldman:
    It’s an open thread.
    He put it there to show his eleventy billion support for Israel, remember he also told AIPAC that he would move the American embassy to an undivided Israeli capital of Jerusalem. He wants to strengthen all those relationships in the Middle East that were frayed by the non enforcement of the “red line”, and this is his first step. It will also go over real well with our European allies. Do you think he knows that most muslims aren’t A-rabs? As much as most muslims are pro two state solution, they are much more adamant about the fate of the al Aqsa mosque. Strange how it almost seems like he knows nothing about anything that doesn’t involve Donald Trump.

  42. 42.

    Frankensteinbeck

    September 23, 2016 at 9:29 pm

    @hovercraft:
    American Jews, especially the hardcore Zionists, are intensely aware that Trump hangs with neo-Nazis, and the reports I have heard is that even before they found out, their response to his rhetoric was ‘We’ll be next.’ It will be interesting to see how that vote breaks down.

  43. 43.

    p.a.

    September 23, 2016 at 9:30 pm

    @efgoldman: a series that has, FSM knows why, fallen into the memory hole.

  44. 44.

    hovercraft

    September 23, 2016 at 9:31 pm

    @efgoldman:
    I read it in the WaPost a couple of days ago. So yes it’s for real. The events of the last few days just overtook everything, so it got lost.

  45. 45.

    Steve in the ATL

    September 23, 2016 at 9:31 pm

    @LAO:

    A retired lawyer, who is attending the trial, has been posting her impressions at fogbow. She’s amazingly insightful.

    Damn you, LAO–just when I was off the Bundy crack, you get me right back on it! Hope the wife wasn’t hoping to see me tonight.

  46. 46.

    Adam L Silverman

    September 23, 2016 at 9:33 pm

    @Frankensteinbeck: I had to get my Mom a subscription to Jewish Preppers Monthly. She’s been canning away. Unfortunately we now have a ten year supply of kosher dill pickles because its the only prepper recipe with “kosher” in the name… And matzoh…

  47. 47.

    Steeplejack

    September 23, 2016 at 9:34 pm

    @Omnes Omnibus:

    A snifter of vanilla brandy sounds good about now.

    :: self-deports to other end of bar ::

  48. 48.

    sukabi

    September 23, 2016 at 9:34 pm

    @Omnes Omnibus: he can understand each individual word, but dollars to donuts on Monday he’ll be fined at least once for failure to comply.

  49. 49.

    Redshift

    September 23, 2016 at 9:37 pm

    @Adam L Silverman: Or it’s some kind of bank shot to try to appeal to big-money Jewish Republicans who have been turned off by Trump’s appeal to anti-Semites and white nationalists.

  50. 50.

    Omnes Omnibus

    September 23, 2016 at 9:38 pm

    @Steeplejack: ::shudder::

    Actually, I am saving it to add to coffee when the weather is colder.

  51. 51.

    LAO

    September 23, 2016 at 9:38 pm

    @Steve in the ATL: Small doses only Steve, it’s pure, unadulterated crack.

  52. 52.

    Adam L Silverman

    September 23, 2016 at 9:39 pm

    @Redshift: Its both. They’ve probably told him there are votes among Israelis who have dual citizenship, especially the settlers. So he kills two birds: he follows there advice, which makes them happy, which gets him money and he figures he picks up some votes from those living in the settlements in the West Bank.

  53. 53.

    hovercraft

    September 23, 2016 at 9:40 pm

    @Frankensteinbeck:
    Like every republican since 9/11 he thinks being ‘tough on terrorism’ will win them the Jewish vote. What they don’t seem to realize is that as Bibi and his merry band of RWNJ’s have moved sharply to the right, American jews have not, they are as pro Israel as ever, but they don not support the governments hard right turn. Jay Street has actually gained a foothold in DC, our politicians are for the most part still in the thrall of AIPAC, but Bibi’s stunt last year has hurt them. He will not win the Jewish vote, and won’t come close. The neo nazi stuff will not help him.

  54. 54.

    Steve in the ATL

    September 23, 2016 at 9:40 pm

    @SiubhanDuinne:

    @Omnes Omnibus:

    You are making that up.

    @efgoldman:

    No, I am not making this up.

    You don’t get sophisticated, insightful debates like this at Red State!

  55. 55.

    Redshift

    September 23, 2016 at 9:41 pm

    I have to say, the Bundys are disappointing me. Sure, they’re ridiculous, but I was hoping they’d be funnier.

  56. 56.

    opiejeanne

    September 23, 2016 at 9:41 pm

    @efgoldman: 200,000 US citizens live in Israel?

    Never mind. Adam was quick.

  57. 57.

    sukabi

    September 23, 2016 at 9:41 pm

    @JPL: what I wouldn’t give to see one of drumpfs crew get (senor)frog marched to jail before the election…. would be worth all the angst this election season is causing.

  58. 58.

    Steve in the ATL

    September 23, 2016 at 9:41 pm

    @LAO: Duly noted. What’s up with your hearing in Atlanta?

  59. 59.

    hovercraft

    September 23, 2016 at 9:42 pm

    @Adam L Silverman:
    In response to Trump or because of the neo Nazi’s?

  60. 60.

    p.a.

    September 23, 2016 at 9:45 pm

    @Redshift: Shelly? Is he in on Don anyway? Others I don’t know, low profile compared to Adelson I guess. Norm P and Always Wrong aren’t big $ guys, and how many votes can their reversal bring…

  61. 61.

    SiubhanDuinne

    September 23, 2016 at 9:45 pm

    @Adam L Silverman:

    Unfortunately we now have a ten year supply of kosher dill pickles because its the only prepper recipe with “kosher” in the name… And matzoh…

    I think I can say, without fear of contradiction: OY!

  62. 62.

    LAO

    September 23, 2016 at 9:45 pm

    @Steve in the ATL: first week of December. (Until one of my asshole co-counsel objects). Circuit has assigned an exact date, just a “week of” date.

  63. 63.

    Steve in the ATL

    September 23, 2016 at 9:46 pm

    @efgoldman: Isn’t he a tax lawyer? I don’t think that really counts.

    Kidding, OO! I deduce from your excellent taste in music that you are a highly skilled practitioner of the law.

  64. 64.

    LAO

    September 23, 2016 at 9:47 pm

    @Redshift: just wait till Wednesday, when they start testifying.

  65. 65.

    Omnes Omnibus

    September 23, 2016 at 9:47 pm

    @efgoldman: Technically, according to my ‘resume’ on Twitter, ” I’m just a hack lawyer who drinks too much and falls in love with girls.”

    @Steve in the ATL:

    I deduce from your excellent taste in music that you are a highly skilled practitioner of the law.

    With the mad reasoning skilz you just flashed, I have to say you must be pretty good yourself.

  66. 66.

    SiubhanDuinne

    September 23, 2016 at 9:47 pm

    @Steve in the ATL:

    I came here for an argument!

    > I’m sorry, this is contradiction!

  67. 67.

    Steeplejack

    September 23, 2016 at 9:49 pm

    @efgoldman:

    Five-episode block on Logo every weekday morning.

  68. 68.

    Steve in the ATL

    September 23, 2016 at 9:49 pm

    @efgoldman: D’oh! Please strike my comment from the record. Does explain a lot about Burnsie though….

  69. 69.

    Adam L Silverman

    September 23, 2016 at 9:50 pm

    @efgoldman: Great, but I don’t think surviving off of them while fending of the alt-right hordes of the Trumpacolypse is a smart dietary choice.

  70. 70.

    Adam L Silverman

    September 23, 2016 at 9:50 pm

    @hovercraft: All of them Katie.

  71. 71.

    Adam L Silverman

    September 23, 2016 at 9:51 pm

    @SiubhanDuinne: exactly

  72. 72.

    Another Scott

    September 23, 2016 at 9:53 pm

    @Adam L Silverman: He’s got yooge plans for TrumpWorld at the Temple Mount. 13 star hotel, golf course designed by Jack Nicklaus, casino with world’s largest roulette wheels, it’ll be great. Bigly. He’ll put up $50k and the rest will be financed by DeutscheBank.

    :-/

    Cheers,
    Scott.
    (Formerly I’mNotSure…)

  73. 73.

    p.a.

    September 23, 2016 at 9:53 pm

    @SiubhanDuinne: What’s the half-life on an unopened bottle of gefilte fish!

  74. 74.

    Adam L Silverman

    September 23, 2016 at 9:54 pm

    @Another Scott: Hmmm…

  75. 75.

    Adam L Silverman

    September 23, 2016 at 9:55 pm

    @p.a.: African gefilte fish or European gefilte fish?

  76. 76.

    NotMax

    September 23, 2016 at 9:56 pm

    Reminder for TCM this weekend of a film a cut above the norm (for 1950).

    Caged, at 6:30 a.m. Saturday. Women in prison! Intimidating Hope Emerson (all 6’2″ and 230 pounds of her) and Gertrude Hoffman as an aged, hardbitten lifer are standouts.

    @Adam L. Silverman

    Feel free to send as many as you care to this way. One grandmother made, hands down, the best garlic dill pickles in the known universe. Asked her several times for her recipe, which she adamantly refused to share. “It’ll die with me.” And it did. Also too, scrumptious sauerkraut.

  77. 77.

    Felonius Monk

    September 23, 2016 at 9:57 pm

    @Omnes Omnibus:

    ” I’m just a hack lawyer who drinks too much and falls in love with girls.”

    I hope eye for girls is better than your selection of alcohol. Vanilla Brandy, indeed. :-)

  78. 78.

    JPL

    September 23, 2016 at 9:58 pm

    @hovercraft: The neo nazi stuff will not help him. Tell Trump’s sons that.

  79. 79.

    p.a.

    September 23, 2016 at 9:59 pm

    @Another Scott: Wailing Wall… big downer… work with me here… better lighting… juice bar- geddit? Think Blarney Stone- move the people through, faster turnover… positive vibes… donation spot, more trees for Israel, orphans, you know… who owns the current rights???

  80. 80.

    opiejeanne

    September 23, 2016 at 10:00 pm

    @LAO: I was glued to the internet for weeks while the refuge was occupied by these bums. So much of it was infuriating, so much was hilarious, that it was hard to look away. I’m so glad that other people are covering the trial for us because it felt like it happened in our backyard, almost.

  81. 81.

    Omnes Omnibus

    September 23, 2016 at 10:00 pm

    @Felonius Monk: You just made the list.

  82. 82.

    hovercraft

    September 23, 2016 at 10:01 pm

    @Another Scott:
    That would result in the first ever Mosad, Hezbollah, ISIS, joint assassination plot, hell the Christians would be in on it too. Then he would really be able to boast of his greatness, he would be remembered as the president who solved the Israeli Palestinian conflict.

  83. 83.

    hovercraft

    September 23, 2016 at 10:04 pm

    Ap pro pos of nothing my esteemed governor has transcended the magic number of 27%, Chris Christie has an approval rating of 23%. Behold one of the most ‘talented republicans in the country.’

  84. 84.

    Another Scott

    September 23, 2016 at 10:06 pm

    @p.a.:

    Wailing Wall… big downer…

    Donnie will have that wall fixed up in no time at all, and under budget. Nobody knows how to build walls like Donnie.

    Plus, what with all the crumbling infrastructure and the place being “rife with crime”, it’ll be the perfect venue for Donnie to show how he would fix American cities. Just pave the place over, get rid of all the crumbing infrastructure that hasn’t been cared for in the last 2000 years, give tax breaks so the right people will come in and show the locals how it’s done – what’s not to like?

    :-/

    Cheers,
    Scott.

  85. 85.

    Steve in the ATL

    September 23, 2016 at 10:06 pm

    @efgoldman:

    Well, that and that he’s a Dookie.

    Poor kid never had a chance

  86. 86.

    NotMax

    September 23, 2016 at 10:07 pm

    @p.a.

    In Trumpworld, Wailing Wall is a ready-made surface for advertising posters. Also a reverse-Automat set-up, where money is inserted to open the little door, allowing insertion of the slip of paper with a prayer.

  87. 87.

    narya

    September 23, 2016 at 10:09 pm

    I went to Oberlin (a long time ago). Their sports teams were/are the Yeomen. When I was there, the women’s teams referred to themselves as the Yeomamas.

  88. 88.

    Miss Bianca

    September 23, 2016 at 10:09 pm

    @Omnes Omnibus: Somehow I’m picturing him rolling his eyes and pooching out his lips like a sulky teenager.

    Seriously, can a lawyer act so egregiously badly in a courtroom that s/he is liable to being bounced by the judge?

  89. 89.

    Adam L Silverman

    September 23, 2016 at 10:12 pm

    @narya: yeowoman sounds to my ear, when said aloud, as a bad way to try to get a woman’s attention: “yo woman!”

  90. 90.

    Omnes Omnibus

    September 23, 2016 at 10:14 pm

    @Miss Bianca: Unlikely.

  91. 91.

    Miss Bianca

    September 23, 2016 at 10:15 pm

    @Adam L Silverman: Jewish Preppers Monthly? Man, I haven’t seen that one in the library around here…

  92. 92.

    Adam L Silverman

    September 23, 2016 at 10:16 pm

    @Miss Bianca: I’m pretty sure M4’s diagnostic tool will list that comment as negative instead of sarcasm.

  93. 93.

    Miss Bianca

    September 23, 2016 at 10:20 pm

    @Omnes Omnibus: So he just gets to act like an ass and waste everyone’s time? Nice work if you can get it.

  94. 94.

    Miss Bianca

    September 23, 2016 at 10:21 pm

    @Adam L Silverman: I’m laughing even tho’ I’m not really sure I see how anyone could take my little remark as anything but a SINCERE desire for information!

  95. 95.

    Omnes Omnibus

    September 23, 2016 at 10:22 pm

    @Adam L Silverman: Yeah, I have been wondering how the thing handles sarcasm. Not to mention all the other tricks: dramatic irony, metaphor, bathos, puns, parody, litotes, and satire.

  96. 96.

    Omnes Omnibus

    September 23, 2016 at 10:23 pm

    @Miss Bianca: Contempt citations at a grand a pop?

  97. 97.

    Miss Bianca

    September 23, 2016 at 10:25 pm

    @Omnes Omnibus: It didn’t sound to me like it made that much of an impression on him. But I’ve been proven to be wrong on a couple occasions now and then…

  98. 98.

    Felonius Monk

    September 23, 2016 at 10:26 pm

    @Omnes Omnibus:

    You just made the list.

    I am an old man. I’m happy as hell to be on someone’s list.

  99. 99.

    Miss Bianca

    September 23, 2016 at 10:27 pm

    @narya: That’s better than “the Lady Yeomen.” Which is what they’d be around here.

    I love “The Lady Spartans.” But my favorite girls’ team hereabouts is definitely “The Lady Pirates.”

  100. 100.

    Shana

    September 23, 2016 at 10:29 pm

    @Adam L Silverman: You can can matzo?

    @p.a.: “Always Wrong” gave a fair amount to his (our) synagogue.

  101. 101.

    Adam L Silverman

    September 23, 2016 at 10:29 pm

    @Miss Bianca: I meant my comment about getting my Mom a subscription to a fictional niche periodical.

  102. 102.

    Adam L Silverman

    September 23, 2016 at 10:29 pm

    @Omnes Omnibus: don’t forget the bon mots!

  103. 103.

    a hip hop artist from Idaho (fka Bella Q)

    September 23, 2016 at 10:30 pm

    @LAO: From what little I’ve read he does seem to the the world’s worst (or at least in the US) at cross. And adequate would be an overstatement of his trial skills – at either table.

  104. 104.

    Adam L Silverman

    September 23, 2016 at 10:32 pm

    @Miss Bianca: Actually female Spartiates (Spartan citizens) were referred to as butt thumpers. Its derived from part of the mandated physical training regimen for female Spartiates dictated by the Lycurgun Code. This specific exercise was done by jumping up and bouncing one’s heels off of one buttocks.

  105. 105.

    Adam L Silverman

    September 23, 2016 at 10:33 pm

    @Shana: You don’t have to can it, that stuff will fight with the mutant cockroaches and mutant twinkies for control over the world after the nuclear/zombie/pandemic/insert name of nightmare here apocalypse.

  106. 106.

    Shana

    September 23, 2016 at 10:36 pm

    Not to mention what it does to the digestive system after a week….

    Good night all.

    BTW, Great Performances Hamilton’s America airs on October 21st. It’s actually on my calendar, which I never do for TV shows. Too far out to set the DVR so I need a different method to remember it. Can’t wait!

  107. 107.

    divF

    September 23, 2016 at 10:37 pm

    @Omnes Omnibus: Not to mention metonymy and synecdoche.

  108. 108.

    debbie

    September 23, 2016 at 10:40 pm

    @efgoldman:

    There are about 200,000 Americans living in Israel who can vote here. I believe I heard he’s got like 70% of the vote.

    ETA: Palestinian rental rates are cheaper, I’d bet.

  109. 109.

    sukabi

    September 23, 2016 at 10:42 pm

    @hovercraft: possible impeachment for him as well..that ought to drive his # down further…

  110. 110.

    Miss Bianca

    September 23, 2016 at 10:53 pm

    @Adam L Silverman: You know, you and O2 have this amazing talent for spinning pure bullshit in a way that make it look like cotton candy. : )

    btw, I did see your response in that other thread. Thanks!

  111. 111.

    chopper

    September 23, 2016 at 10:56 pm

    I move for a bad court…thingy.

  112. 112.

    Adam L Silverman

    September 23, 2016 at 10:57 pm

    @Miss Bianca: Its a gift…

    And you’re quite welcome. I went back and checked after dinner and saw that you saw.

    ETA: In all seriousness the Mominator is quite concerned.

  113. 113.

    redshirt

    September 23, 2016 at 11:03 pm

    @chopper: “The most blatant case of fraudulent advertising since my suit against the film The Never Ending Story”.

  114. 114.

    debbie

    September 23, 2016 at 11:07 pm

    @efgoldman:

    There’s an old saying somewhere about the richest men being the biggest cheapskates.

  115. 115.

    Miss Bianca

    September 23, 2016 at 11:09 pm

    @Adam L Silverman: In all seriousness, I can’t blame her.

  116. 116.

    Tissue Thin Pseudonym

    September 23, 2016 at 11:10 pm

    @Miss Bianca: I once traveled on the same flight as a high school girls volleyball team with the unfortunate name, “the Beavers.”

  117. 117.

    Miss Bianca

    September 23, 2016 at 11:21 pm

    @Tissue Thin Pseudonym: How do you cheer on “The Beavers”? “Go, Beavers – chew ’em up!”?

    I better stop now.

  118. 118.

    burnspbesq

    September 23, 2016 at 11:22 pm

    @Steve in the ATL:

    Isn’t he a tax lawyer?

    That would be me. I think Omnes is an ALJ.

  119. 119.

    Omnes Omnibus

    September 23, 2016 at 11:25 pm

    @burnspbesq: Was. Fuck Scott Walker.

  120. 120.

    sukabi

    September 23, 2016 at 11:25 pm

    Adam, I L.O.V.E that you’ve dubbed the Bundy Bunch Snack Team Six… but a small quibble / suggestion for their official shield… pretty sure these dumbos wouldn’t know what the pie server is or how to use one. Also, knowing what they received in response to their pleas for snacks and their reactions to those “gifts” I propose changing out the pie server for a pair of crossed dildos.

  121. 121.

    Adam L Silverman

    September 23, 2016 at 11:27 pm

    @sukabi: I understand your concerns. I originally considered putting a banana split in one of the spaces. Or Cookie Monster. Or both. I mucked about for well over an hour when I made it.

  122. 122.

    Steeplejack

    September 23, 2016 at 11:30 pm

    @Omnes Omnibus:

    Fuck him up his stupid ass.

  123. 123.

    Lurking Canadian

    September 23, 2016 at 11:30 pm

    I am actually tempted to sympathy for the Bundys’ lawyer. These guys are guilty. Everybody knows they’re guilty. They fuckin’ BRAGGED about the crimes they were committing while they were committing them. The prosecution could use the defendants’ YouTube channe as their entire case.

    So, of course their lawyer is throwing mud against the judge hoping some will stick. What options does he have?

  124. 124.

    Omnes Omnibus

    September 23, 2016 at 11:33 pm

    @Lurking Canadian:

    What options does he have?

    He could be professional. Sometimes one has a loser of a case and a client who wants to go to trial. You go in and take your beating.

  125. 125.

    Steve in the ATL

    September 23, 2016 at 11:34 pm

    @Omnes Omnibus: Speaking of clowns…

  126. 126.

    Omnes Omnibus

    September 23, 2016 at 11:37 pm

    @Steve in the ATL: There’s never just one clown. You’ve seen their cars.

  127. 127.

    Steve in the ATL

    September 23, 2016 at 11:37 pm

    @Omnes Omnibus:

    Sometimes one has a loser of a case

    Are you describing my career?

  128. 128.

    a hip hop artist from Idaho (fka Bella Q)

    September 23, 2016 at 11:38 pm

    @Omnes Omnibus: Exactly. Except professional seems to be slightly beyond his skill set.

    @Steve in the ATL: That’s not very nice.

  129. 129.

    Adam L Silverman

    September 23, 2016 at 11:39 pm

    @Steve in the ATL: They finally got one!

  130. 130.

    Steve in the ATL

    September 23, 2016 at 11:41 pm

    @Lurking Canadian:

    I am actually tempted to sympathy for the Bundys’ lawyer. These guys are guilty. Everybody knows they’re guilty. They fuckin’ BRAGGED about the crimes they were committing while they were committing them. The prosecution could use the defendants’ YouTube channe as their entire case.

    So, of course their lawyer is throwing mud against the judge hoping some will stick. What options does he have?

    The lawyer is also a true believer sov cit nutjob, so save your sympathy for a more deserving group…like Canadian NHL teams.

    Zing!

  131. 131.

    Steve in the ATL

    September 23, 2016 at 11:42 pm

    @Adam L Silverman: Yeah they got one, but as Omnes pointed out….

  132. 132.

    Omnes Omnibus

    September 23, 2016 at 11:46 pm

    @Steve in the ATL: I’ve had them too. Client in a pro-bono consumer law case is on the stand. Hours of prep to establish the difference between a deposit (which we were arguing that she had made) and a down payment (which the other side was arguing). Asked about the payment by opposing counsel, she blurts out “It was a down payment.” I had three more hours of trial even though the case was over at that point.

  133. 133.

    sukabi

    September 23, 2016 at 11:57 pm

    @Lurking Canadian: not being their lawyer for one, he’s not court appointed is he?

  134. 134.

    Steve in the ATL

    September 24, 2016 at 12:00 am

    @Omnes Omnibus: painful! I had an appointed criminal case where my client and I went to the DA’s office to watch the security camera video. I told my client not to say anything. As soon as the video started, he pointed at it and said “hey, that’s me!”

    But at least that wasn’t mid-trial.

  135. 135.

    Omnes Omnibus

    September 24, 2016 at 12:01 am

    @sukabi: He is a true believer. That does not obviate his obligation to do his job properly.

  136. 136.

    LAO

    September 24, 2016 at 12:06 am

    @Steve in the ATL: lol. That has never happened to me. But I kind of wish it had.

  137. 137.

    Steve in the ATL

    September 24, 2016 at 12:10 am

    @LAO: at that point, you can’t be blamed for anything that goes wrong in the case!

  138. 138.

    Omnes Omnibus

    September 24, 2016 at 12:27 am

    @Steve in the ATL: Even worse, opposing counsel came to me with a decent settlement offer while the jury was out and my client rejected it.

  139. 139.

    redshirt

    September 24, 2016 at 12:31 am

    It’s lawyers all the way down.

  140. 140.

    Omnes Omnibus

    September 24, 2016 at 12:36 am

    @redshirt: Do you have a problem with that? Think before you answer.

  141. 141.

    redshirt

    September 24, 2016 at 12:39 am

    @Omnes Omnibus: Not at all.

  142. 142.

    Omnes Omnibus

    September 24, 2016 at 12:40 am

    @redshirt: Good answer.

  143. 143.

    redshirt

    September 24, 2016 at 12:41 am

    @Omnes Omnibus: A litigious people are a non violent people….

  144. 144.

    Omnes Omnibus

    September 24, 2016 at 12:54 am

    @redshirt: The vikings’ use of weregild (law stuff) helped to minimize violence within viking society. Doesn’t mean that the vikings weren’t as violent as fuck.

  145. 145.

    Ruckus

    September 24, 2016 at 1:21 am

    @debbie:
    Supposedly a wealthy great uncle told my dad, when he was starting his business, that no one gets there using their own money. Now I never met this supposedly wealthy great uncle, who supposedly owned a bunch of property in Beverly Hills in my life so it may just be a family story. But dad and I both used our own money in our businesses and we didn’t get anywhere within thousands of miles of wealthy, so there you go. Trump may have heard this story and he just doesn’t understand that you “borrow” the money, you don’t steal it. He is rather dumb it seems.

  146. 146.

    oz29

    September 24, 2016 at 3:00 am

    @Omnes Omnibus: I suspect he is auditioning for a spot as the Go-to Guy for SovCits with high-profile legal issues. I don’t know if he is bad at cross because I’ve never seen him. I have been appointed to represent fools like these, though. They constantly demand that their attorney do things that would violate the rules, then complain that their lawyer “won’t represent them” when the lawyer refuses. Mumford isn’t doing that. He’s hitting all the sweet spots for them.

  147. 147.

    Steeplejack

    September 24, 2016 at 3:09 am

    @Omnes Omnibus:

    LOL.

  148. 148.

    Ruckus

    September 24, 2016 at 3:28 am

    @a hip hop artist from Idaho (fka Bella Q):

    Except professional seems to be slightly beyond his skill set.

    Not a lawyer but I did help a neighbor/friend study for the CA bar once upon a long time ago. Though even without that experience I recognize polite lawyerly BS when I see it so I’m going to take exception to the use of the word slightly.

  149. 149.

    Chris Landee

    September 25, 2016 at 12:06 pm

    The correct language is “a person of yeo.”

Comments are closed.

Primary Sidebar

Fundraising 2023-24

Wis*Dems Supreme Court + SD-8

Recent Comments

  • different-church-lady on Happy Diversions: Respite Open Thread (Mar 23, 2023 @ 10:41pm)
  • CaseyL on Happy Diversions: Respite Open Thread (Mar 23, 2023 @ 10:37pm)
  • Tom Levenson on Happy Diversions: Respite Open Thread (Mar 23, 2023 @ 10:35pm)
  • Origuy on Happy Diversions: Respite Open Thread (Mar 23, 2023 @ 10:34pm)
  • Geminid on No Cake for Me Today Open Thread (Mar 23, 2023 @ 10:32pm)

🎈Keep Balloon Juice Ad Free

Become a Balloon Juice Patreon
Donate with Venmo, Zelle or PayPal

Balloon Juice Posts

View by Topic
View by Author
View by Month & Year
View by Past Author

Featuring

Medium Cool
Artists in Our Midst
Authors in Our Midst
We All Need A Little Kindness
Classified Documents: A Primer
State & Local Elections Discussion

Calling All Jackals

Site Feedback
Nominate a Rotating Tag
Submit Photos to On the Road
Balloon Juice Mailing List Signup
Balloon Juice Anniversary (All Links)
Balloon Juice Anniversary (All Posts)

Twitter / Spoutible

Balloon Juice (Spoutible)
WaterGirl (Spoutible)
TaMara (Spoutible)
John Cole
DougJ (aka NYT Pitchbot)
Betty Cracker
Tom Levenson
TaMara
David Anderson
Major Major Major Major
ActualCitizensUnited

Join the Fight!

Join the Fight Signup Form
All Join the Fight Posts

Balloon Juice Events

5/14  The Apocalypse
5/20  Home Away from Home
5/29  We’re Back, Baby
7/21  Merging!

Balloon Juice for Ukraine

Donate

Site Footer

Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

  • Facebook
  • RSS
  • Twitter
  • YouTube
  • Comment Policy
  • Our Authors
  • Blogroll
  • Our Artists
  • Privacy Policy

Copyright © 2023 Dev Balloon Juice · All Rights Reserved · Powered by BizBudding Inc

Share this ArticleLike this article? Email it to a friend!

Email sent!