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You are here: Home / Absent Friends / Late Night Open Thread: “If You Can’t Get Rid of the Family Skeletons, Make Them Dance”

Late Night Open Thread: “If You Can’t Get Rid of the Family Skeletons, Make Them Dance”

by Anne Laurie|  December 28, 201611:59 pm| 40 Comments

This post is in: Absent Friends, Open Threads, Popular Culture, Vagina Outrage, Ever Get The Feeling You've Been Cheated?

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Everyone is sharing pictures of Fisher when she was young, but let me show you the Leia that was the most important to me: General Organa pic.twitter.com/xXFETlkZ8Y

— Anne Thériault (@anne_theriault) December 27, 2016

When I was a kid, she made me want to be tough and smart. When I was an adult, she made me want to be sober. RIP Carrie Fisher.

— Ana Marie Cox (@anamariecox) December 27, 2016

#ConfessMyUnpopularOpinions: I loathed Singin’ in the Rain so intensely it put me off movie musicals for life, so I never paid much attention to Debbie Reynolds. But after watching Carrie Fisher’s Wishful Drinking (highly recommended! — with due trigger warnings), I suspect her mother, if she had to die at all, would’ve loved the theatricality of dropping in her tracks while planning her daughter’s funeral.

NYMag:

While many paid tribute to Carrie Fisher’s legacy on Tuesday by sharing their favorite scenes from Star Wars or When Harry Met Sally, some fans chose to remember the actress for her work destigmatizing mental illness… Soon the hashtag #InHonorOfCarrie had over 180,000 unique visitors on Twitter with many revealing their mental-health issues…

Julie DiCaro, a Chicago journalist who also tweeted on Tuesday, told the Times that Fisher made it easier to not feel so alone in her illness: “It’s comforting that Carrie, or Princess Leia — who’s cooler than Princess Leia? — was comfortable speaking publicly about her struggles. It made me feel comfortable.” Which seems like the message Fisher would have wanted, especially as she chose to present only her true self, war wounds and all, in her later years.

https://t.co/vGwDnOdswB pic.twitter.com/57mS7gsVUq

— Katherine Miller (@katherinemiller) December 27, 2016


"Fisher, seen here in front of the New York Times photo editor who chose this picture…" https://t.co/rI1VWs93zT

— Olivier Knox (@OKnox) December 27, 2016

Carrie Fisher was open about her diagnosis of bipolar disorder and didn't take fame too seriously https://t.co/lbElaTiKz1 pic.twitter.com/KYGbxabXJF

— The New York Times (@nytimes) December 27, 2016

Sigh. If you're hell bent on using a Jabba picture, go forward 10 frames to where she kills the fat fuck. pic.twitter.com/bzC7iSPwIg

— Shlok Vaidya (@shloky) December 27, 2016

please honor carrie fisher's wishes and include in her obituaries that she "drowned in moonlight, strangled by her own bra." ?????? pic.twitter.com/Pj5sRsIvkz

— elisabeth (@threelisabeth) December 27, 2016

And frankly, I believe the lady who could treat Russell Crowe like this…

RIP Carrie
2000 she grabbed my ass and said " you would have loved me when I was on Xanax". Funny, interesting, chaotic , soulful. Friend.

— Russell Crowe (@russellcrowe) December 28, 2016

… would’ve been amused by the Cinnabon brand-tweet, whether or not Slate approved:

Twenty-four questions raised by Cinnabon’s regrettable tweet about Carrie Fisher: https://t.co/dbuo1yqD6J pic.twitter.com/k6AxACieoS

— Slate (@Slate) December 28, 2016

I was looking for a picture I once saw of Carrie Fisher giving the finger, and these are just a few of what I found. God bless her. pic.twitter.com/yElXqa4l09

— Freddie Campion (@FreddieCampion) December 27, 2016

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Previous Post: « RIP, Debbie Reynolds
Next Post: Thursday Morning Open Thread: The Common Clay of the New… Administration »

Reader Interactions

40Comments

  1. 1.

    Robin G

    December 29, 2016 at 12:06 am

    Feeling terrible for Todd Fisher and Billie Lourd tonight. Dear God.

  2. 2.

    Steeplejack (tablet)

    December 29, 2016 at 12:11 am

    @Anne Laurie:

    Wishful Drinking.

    (Feel free to erase this.)

  3. 3.

    Yarrow

    December 29, 2016 at 12:14 am

    If you haven’t seen “Catastrophe” it’s very funny and Carrie Fisher plays the male character’s mother. She isn’t in every episode but she’s a delight when she does appear. Season 1 and 2 are available on Amazon Prime. She just finished shooting Season 3, where apparently she has a larger role. She was flying home from London at the end of the shoot when she had the heart attack.

    This remembrance of her by Rob Delaney, the male lead on the show, is lovely. Very mild spoiler in excerpt below, but it’s funny and so Carrie Fisher.

    Carrie was the only cast member Sharon and I would let improvise. (I say “let”; as if we could stop her. She let us put her in our show.) We’re a bit despotic and inflexible with our dialogue because we’re insane, but Carrie was more insane and would always, always make it funnier and better. In episode one of series two you can hear her singing an improvised song about areolae in the background of our daughter’s christening party.

    I’m looking forward to Season 3 but it will be so bittersweet. I guess it will be her final work.

  4. 4.

    Anne Laurie

    December 29, 2016 at 12:18 am

    @Steeplejack (tablet): Nah… I actually *do* appreciate your proofreading (mostly). Thanks!

  5. 5.

    BGinCHI

    December 29, 2016 at 12:21 am

    Can’t believe no one is lauding her awesome turn in The Blues Brothers movie.

    Locusts.

  6. 6.

    Steeplejack (tablet)

    December 29, 2016 at 12:24 am

    @BGinCHI:

    It was mentioned in earlier threads. This one has barely started.

  7. 7.

    Suzanne

    December 29, 2016 at 12:31 am

    @BGinCHI: My favorite is her role of Marie in “When Harry Met Sally”.

    “You’re right, you’re right, I know you’re right.”

    “I promise….I will never want your wagon wheel coffee table.”

  8. 8.

    BGinCHI

    December 29, 2016 at 12:32 am

    @Steeplejack (tablet): OK, good. I always thought she stole the early part of that film. I just hadn’t seen it mentioned along with all her other roles….

    I can’t be in every thread because of life. And, you know, being a superhero.

  9. 9.

    BGinCHI

    December 29, 2016 at 12:33 am

    @Suzanne: I love that she’s paired with Bruno Kirby. Perfect.

  10. 10.

    Yarrow

    December 29, 2016 at 12:39 am

    @Suzanne: I love her in that role. There’s a scene where they’re sitting at some table having lunch or drinks and Marie is trying to find a guy for Sally. She has a card file for all the men she knows. She’s thumbing through the file and says a guy’s name. Sally says he’s been married for a year. And Marie says something like, “Really…Married….” as she turns down the corner of his card. It’s so beautifully done and only someone like Carrie Fisher could have pulled it off. I love that scene.

  11. 11.

    BGinCHI

    December 29, 2016 at 12:40 am

    I’m worried Cole’s cat is killing him right now.

    Thanks, 2016. Way to infuse me with calm.

  12. 12.

    Mnemosyne

    December 29, 2016 at 12:56 am

    @Robin G:

    I had to deal with the death of a sibling last year — as in, paying for the cremation and memorial — so my first thought was, Oh, God, poor Todd Fisher.

    True story: at one point, my mother was saying that she wished she could die, too, and then started complaining about stomach pains, so I glared at her and said, “If you die on me, old woman, I will NEVER forgive you!”

    (She didn’t, and we both now think it was funny.)

  13. 13.

    Mnemosyne

    December 29, 2016 at 1:00 am

    Yep, I’m in “morbid joke” mode right now.

    G saw a tweet from someone making a joke about Fisher, Reynolds, and the lack of boundaries between them that Fisher wrote about a lot, and I have been picturing Fisher like, Really, Ma? You couldn’t even let me have death to myself?

  14. 14.

    Emma

    December 29, 2016 at 1:08 am

    @Mnemosyne: So have many of us. I keep thinking of Postcards, and I picture Carrie saying to her mother so we end the way we started, Ma?.

  15. 15.

    Suzanne

    December 29, 2016 at 1:15 am

    O/T: has anyone here ever had a breast reduction? I would like to hear thoughts/advice, as I am considering it.

  16. 16.

    Mnemosyne

    December 29, 2016 at 1:19 am

    If you need to fill about half an hour, one of the things Fisher did before leaving England was film the Christmas episode of a panel show called “8 Out Of 10 Cats Do Countdown.”

    G is currently obsessed with the show, which is how I know about it..

  17. 17.

    NotMax

    December 29, 2016 at 1:27 am

    @Mnemosyne

    G needs to watch QI, if he hasn’t binged on them already.

    (Jimmy Carr is a frequent guest panelist.)

  18. 18.

    Mnemosyne

    December 29, 2016 at 1:29 am

    @NotMax:

    He had to turn to “8 Out Of 10 Cats” because he had watched every episode of “QI.” Seriously, ALL OF THEM.

    He likes the new host — she’s not the same as Stephen Fry, but good in her own way.

  19. 19.

    NotMax

    December 29, 2016 at 1:32 am

    @Mnemosyne

    Seriously, ALL OF THEM.

    Ditto. Both QI and QI XL.

  20. 20.

    ruemara

    December 29, 2016 at 1:34 am

    @Suzanne: If it hurts your back and makes you happy, go for it. Mind you, it is also expensive and painful and unless you have a clear medical doctor’s recommendation for one, you’re paying for it out of pocket as cosmetic surgery.
    I will be having a complete torso skin procedure which will involve some boobage reduction so I got to learn a lot about it. Most seem happy about it. Pick 3-4 reputable surgeons, go be assessed and find the one that makes you feel confident in the procedure. Ask all the questions. You’re about to be knocked out and have some doofus carve you like a turkey, spatchcock your breasteses and resew them into another package. Ask. All. The. Questions. Expect to be out for a week, sore & in pain for about 2 and lock down who is doing aftercare. Their goal is you up & moving reasonably soon. Buy a recovery bra garment or two.

  21. 21.

    Major Major Major Major

    December 29, 2016 at 1:36 am

    I watched her 30 Rock episode today in memoriam, which Slate had a good little write up of too http://www.slate.com/blogs/browbeat/2016/12/27/carrie_fisher_gave_30_rock_one_of_its_greatest_episodes.html

  22. 22.

    Mnemosyne

    December 29, 2016 at 1:38 am

    @Major Major Major Major:

    “Never go with a hippie to a second location!”

  23. 23.

    Suzanne

    December 29, 2016 at 1:40 am

    @ruemara: Thanks for the advice. The cost is a barrier, as is the downtime, but whatever. I hate my boobs. I want to lose 20 pounds or so before I go in, but even when I lose weight, my boobs don’t deflate. It sucks.

  24. 24.

    NotMax

    December 29, 2016 at 1:40 am

    @Mnemsoyne

    Occurred to me that if he appreciates acerbic British situational humor, he might like the series W1A. Not everyone’s cuppa, though. Two very short seasons.

    Also too the Aussie series Dreamland (a/k/a Utopia). Two thumbs way up on that one. Multiple seasons.

    Both are on Netflix.

  25. 25.

    Mnemosyne

    December 29, 2016 at 1:44 am

    @Suzanne:

    I skimmed the previous thread and know that this is a delicate topic (that you don’t have to answer), but if you haven’t completed your family, a breast reduction can make it difficult to breast-feed.

  26. 26.

    Suzanne

    December 29, 2016 at 1:44 am

    @ruemara: When is your procedure? I’d be grateful to hear your thoughts afterward.

  27. 27.

    LesGS

    December 29, 2016 at 1:49 am

    @Mnemosyne: You DID? Oh, crap, how did I miss that? So sorry for your loss.

    My brother died when he was 22, me 26 (I’m 58 now), and just a couple weeks ago my mom FINALLY sent me his skateboard, and me and my daughters have been trundling up and down my block on it. It is a true joy to see them put their feet where he put his feet, and to shoot off away from me. It makes me so happy to see them playing with his toy.

    Now, I don’t want them doing the crazy shit we were doing on our ‘boards back then, which is why it remains MY ‘board, and I’m going to be the only one doing crazy shit on it.

  28. 28.

    Mnemosyne

    December 29, 2016 at 1:53 am

    @LesGS:

    Oh, it was a drama and a half. He had three kids under 18, no will, and was living with a girlfriend while still legally married to his estranged wife, who is a clinical narcissist. It was quite the shitshow.

  29. 29.

    LesGS

    December 29, 2016 at 2:04 am

    @Mnemosyne: Oh! I remember the narcissist SIL (sandwiches?), and your diplomatic maneuverings to get a chance to spend time with your nieces. I’ve since watched a few videos about dealing with narcissists, because, dang, Trumplethinskin, but at least he’s not a member of my family!

    I guess on a personal level, you just go for a very flat, boring, “whatever” affect to manage them. But dang, I’m so grateful I have no one like that in my day to day life.

  30. 30.

    LesGS

    December 29, 2016 at 2:21 am

    @Suzanne: As a transguy, I had (obviously) a lot of issues with my boobs, and in the end had them removed and my chest reconstructed into a male chest.

    However… (was gonna go into my boring self discovery story, but am opting out because boredom) …breast feeding my kids was a really positive experience. If you think you want to do that, be aware that breast reduction surgery can make that difficult if not impossible.

    Now, the size of my breasts created enough physical discomfort that I would have opted to have them reduced after weaning the kids, even without the gender dysphoria. Do what you need to do to be content.

  31. 31.

    mai naem mobile

    December 29, 2016 at 2:23 am

    @Suzanne: I can’t tell you much but I knew a couple of people years ago who got breastfeeding reductions. Both were happy with the results. One was because she had lost weight. Just FYI you can get your surgeon to donate the excess skin that they take off for burn patients. She paid out of pocket. The other person was older and she got it covered by her insurance based on back pain due to the size of her bo0bs.

  32. 32.

    mai naem mobile

    December 29, 2016 at 2:35 am

    @mai naem mobile: Jesus auto correct. Breast reduction not breastfeeding reduction.

  33. 33.

    LesGS

    December 29, 2016 at 2:50 am

    @mai naem mobile: But you’re not far off. Believe me, there comes a time in the whole nursing business when you need a whole breastfeeding reduction thing. Weaning, yeah.

  34. 34.

    Starfish

    December 29, 2016 at 8:42 am

    When people were discussing the ranking of the Balloon Juice website, I think I looked at Alexa or one of the other places that gives you website statistics. It said that Balloon Juice had more women than men, and I was a little skeptical of that until just this minute where I read through a whole comments thread on breast reduction.

  35. 35.

    Pogonip

    December 29, 2016 at 9:11 am

    A small bright spot: so far, in wake of Carrie Fisher’s untimely death, I have not seen one of those inane “she gave us permission to blah blah blah” articles, and I’m pleased. Someone as creative as Carrie Fisher deserved better than inanity.

  36. 36.

    Pogonip

    December 29, 2016 at 9:25 am

    @Starfish: How do they tell, if the name, e.g. Connie Commenter, doesn’t give it away?

  37. 37.

    Emma Anne

    December 29, 2016 at 11:16 am

    @Suzanne:

    My best friend did. She says don’t look up pictures or stories on the internet, because everyone who has a bad experience wants to share it, and most people who have it go fine doesn’t feel that need. Also, ask around and get a good surgeon.

    It was a great experience for her. She got it paid for by insurance because she had back issues for years. She did have one complication – bleeding after surgery (she always has bleeding after surgery though).

    She always wore big loose clothes because she didn’t like the busty look, so afterwards everyone thought she lost weight. I have forgotten she was ever different unless I am reminded.

  38. 38.

    NCSteve

    December 29, 2016 at 11:37 am

    @Pogonip: Seriously? Alexa is ubiquitous and it follows you around from site to site to site, watching what you read, what you click on and puts it altogether into a massive database (unless you have cookies permanently disabled on every device). Alexa is why visiting a website that advertises stuff to sell causes ads for the things you looked at to appear (or would if you didn’t use an adblocker) on every page you visit for months.

    Alexa knows ten times more about you than the NSA ever did or ever will unless you do something that gets you tailed by the FBI. Hell, Alexa probably knows more about most adults than their mothers do.

  39. 39.

    steverinoCT

    December 29, 2016 at 12:46 pm

    @NCSteve: This is why I deeply regret researching underwear for my wife– she can’t find the exact briefs she wants. I now am dogged by risque Sears ads. They never had babydolls and thongs in the paper catalog (I would have noticed, 40 years ago)!

  40. 40.

    Tehanu

    December 29, 2016 at 9:54 pm

    @BGinCHI:

    (The alas, late) Bruno Kirby was the nicest celebrity I ever met (and since I live on the West Side of L.A., I’ve run into a lot of them). He was one of very, very few who asked me what MY name was … really a rarity. I hope he and Carrie are having a few laughs together right now.

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