Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

The fundamental promise of conservatism all over the world is a return to an idealized past that never existed.

Republicans don’t want a speaker to lead them; they want a hostage.

This chaos was totally avoidable.

Anyone who bans teaching American history has no right to shape America’s future.

Quote tweet friends, screenshot enemies.

There are a lot more evil idiots than evil geniuses.

Sitting here in limbo waiting for the dice to roll

Too often we confuse noise with substance. too often we confuse setbacks with defeat.

Giving up is unforgivable.

Since when do we limit our critiques to things we could do better ourselves?

The current Supreme Court is a dangerous, rogue court.

Everything is totally normal and fine!!!

Disagreements are healthy; personal attacks are not.

When do we start airlifting the women and children out of Texas?

Impressively dumb. Congratulations.

American history and black history cannot be separated.

We will not go back.

Keep the Immigrants and deport the fascists!

Let’s not be the monsters we hate.

To the privileged, equality seems like oppression.

They were going to turn on one another at some point. It was inevitable.

“The difference between stupidity and genius is that genius has its limits.”

You would normally have to try pretty hard to self-incriminate this badly.

Too little, too late, ftfnyt. fuck all the way off.

You are here: Home / Politics / Trumpery / Hail to the Hairpiece / Late Night Open Thread

Late Night Open Thread

by | 67 Comments

This post is in: 

We have a crazy person as President.

I’m trying to pretend he does not exist and focusing on all the decisions I have to make about the house, but multiple times during the day I remember that a certifiable nutjob is President.

Apparently he made up a terrorist attack in Sweden tonight. Either that, or he blabbed about an operation that occurred in Sweden (or hell Somalia- who knows if he even got the name right) and didn’t know he was talking about something classified. The fact that EITHER of those is not only possible but believable is terrifying.

Reader Interactions

67Comments

  4. 4.

    Jim, Foolish Literalist

    I can’t find it now, but per somebody’s twitter it looks like he got the Sweden thing from Tucker Carlon’s TeeVee show last night

    He knows it’s true
    Oh so true
    Cause he saw it
    On Tee Vee

    In other news, Tucker Carlson apparently has a Tee Vee show.

  8. 8.

    Mnemosyne

    And the saddest part is that thousands (if not millions) of our fellow Americans are now calling and writing to CNN, MSNBC, etc and demanding to know why they covered up this vital story.

  12. 12.

    seaboogie

    President Nutjob brings gasonline, a match and the Twitters to any random thing he sees on the teevee…we are in such (small) good hands….

  13. 13.

    PeakVT

    A few days ago I was perusing the headlines in my RSS feed and I suddenly felt disoriented, like I had just woken up from a crazy dream and didn’t recognize my own bedroom. It took me a minute or so to accept (or re-accept) that, yes, an orange-hued Russian stooge was indeed POTUS. I’ve never experienced anything like that before. It was like my mind was trying to make a part of reality go away – which would be nice, in a way, but not something I really want.

  14. 14.

    Jim, Foolish Literalist

    @Sinnach: increased crime, apparently, per HuffPo. Trust Fund Pudge says it’s because of immigrants and/or refugees.

    Others concluded that Trump had been referring to a segment on the Fox News show “Tucker Carlson Tonight,” which explored an alleged rise in crime following Sweden’s admission of a large number of refugees from Africa and the Middle East.

    ETA: and speaking of Somalia, our new ambassador gave the Somali president a “Make Somalia Great” hat, so dignity and respect around the world and shit

  17. 17.

    TenguPhule

    Look on the bright side. No Spring Cleaning….because we’ll all be nuclear ashes next spring.

  18. 18.

    PeakVT

    Also, too, I was wondering: when is somebody going to leak Trumpolini’s tax returns? Some part of the “deep state” must have them by now.

  19. 19.

    Jerzy Russian

    @Yarrow: I am embarrassed to admit that I don’t know if that was Bowling Green, Ohio or Bowling Green, Kentucky, or somewhere else. I will be over there in the corner hanging my head in shame if you need me.

  20. 20.

    Major Major Major Major

    We have a crazy person as President.

    I’m trying to pretend he does not exist and focusing on all the decisions I have to make about the house, but multiple times during the day I remember that a certifiable nutjob is President.

    I’m trying so hard to pretend he doesn’t exist that I find myself in Reykjavik.

    Look! A couple pictures!

    We’re having breakfast right now. Sun should rise in march or so, and then we’ll do the golden circle and head to our Airbnb on the south shore.

  23. 23.

    Major Major Major Major

    @Yarrow: @seaboogie: there’s some really cheap airfare these days for whatever reason here–we took Wow Air, under $300 each round-trip from SFO nonstop.

    Hot springs on the last day, maybe the day before too depending on some seasonal considerations. It’s mostly up to the other mister since I’ve been here before!

  26. 26.

    Major Major Major Major

    @Yarrow: I will, but Reykjavik doesn’t photograph great on an iPhone at the equivalent of midnight.

    @seaboogie: the things actually in the country are rather expensive since everything is imported, mind you. There are very cheap flights to the continent on carriers like Ryan Air from here though.

  27. 27.

    Major Major Major Major

    I was listening to the BBC on the drive and they’re referring to the Muslim ban as “the Muslim ban” without additional context. So-and-so is boycotting film festival x because of the Muslim ban, it wasn’t even an American festival, they were boycotting all of them. That’s less context and hemming and hawing than actual American media uses. It’s just the Muslim ban.

    All the goodwill and esteem obama brought back to us on the world stage is already trashed.

  29. 29.

    Viva BrisVegas

    @Jim, Foolish Literalist:

    speaking of Somalia, our new ambassador gave the Somali president a “Make Somalia Great” hat, so dignity and respect around the world and shit

    So why did he leave off the “Again”?

    It’s about time that the Land of Punt made its presence felt again in world affairs.

    The place completely fell apart after that black guy took it over.

  32. 32.

    Mnemosyne

    I’ve started my pre-Disneyworld training regimen. Minimum of 8,000 steps per day (that’s about 45 minutes of walking every day), plus three days of weights, plus I’m going to try and go for a 3 to 5 mile hike on Monday. Because otherwise the 8 to 10 miles of walking per day is going to be fucking hellish.

  37. 37.

    MobiusKlein

    @Major Major Major Major: our family really really disliked WoW air, coming out of SF.
    Lord, they were totally worthless as customer support.

    The rest of Iceland was fine, except the inability to get 1/4 way decent Mexican food.

  40. 40.

    Dog Dawg Damn

    A bit off topic, but did anyone else suffer through Melania’s prayer?

    I’d like to think that if I had lived in a country for 20+ years and had practically unlimited time and money, I could conjugate basic verbs in a speech that is written down for me to speak. Seriously. Not the brightest bulb.

  42. 42.

    Origuy

    @Jim, Foolish Literalist: Go for the aurora, stay for the Kæstur hákarl!

    a national dish of Iceland consisting of a Greenland shark (Somniosus microcephalus) or other sleeper shark which has been cured with a particular fermentation process and hung to dry for four to five months. Kæstur hákarl has a strong ammonia-rich smell and fishy taste.

  43. 43.

    Mnemosyne

    @rikyrah:

    I’m tired from doing it! ? But I’ve done these trips before, so I know that I will be much happier on the trip itself if I do a little training ahead of time.

    I’ve been having a lot of neck and shoulder problems lately, so I’ve really been concentrating the weight training on those areas because I don’t want to be miserable with a neck spasm while I’m spending a lot of money to have fun.

  44. 44.

    Jim, Foolish Literalist

    @Origuy: you gotta try it enchilada style

    Kæstur hákarl has a strong ammonia-rich smell and fishy taste.

    Yup, just needs sour cream and some fresh cilantro

  45. 45.

    ? Martin

    @Mnemosyne: The walking never seems to be that much of a problem, though. But the standing is something people many people don’t do, and it impacts different muscles and affects joints differently than walking.

  46. 46.

    Mnemosyne

    @Dog Dawg Damn:

    It’s hard to say — some people are good with accents and some aren’t. My hairdresser is a very nice (and smart) young woman who immigrated here from Taiwan. When I first started going to her about 10 years ago, she had a very strong accent, but now she can almost pass for a native Californian.

  49. 49.

    Dog Dawg Damn

    @Mnemosyne: Regardless, Nothing makes Evangelical Christians prouder than a former pornographic model butchering the Lord’s Prayer at a campaign rally.

    So says MSNBC.

  51. 51.

    Uncle Cosmo

    @Major Major Major Major: JFK-PRG under $400 for my trip (I fly back from Prague tomorrow). No idea why fares are so low but when I saw that one I jumped on it with both feet, even though it barely got above freezing before the second week of the 2-week stay.

    What’s crazy is that it will cost me more to fly r/t from BWI to Albuquerque next month to help an old friend downsize.

  52. 52.

    cosima

    @Major Major Major Major: We’ve not flown for fun between the US & Scotland for many years, but when we last did we used Iceland Air. Our daughter flies back & forth on Iceland Air (because we pay for it).

    A few nice things about Iceland Air (for those interested in Iceland &/or Scotland):

    1) Great prices if you can easily use one of the cities they are using as a hub & nice planes
    2) Best layover ever — small airport, so moving around the airport doesn’t involve spending ages going through security lines
    3) Re: layovers, you can stay in Iceland, hours or days, no additional cost in your ticket — if you decide to stay several days (as we did once) it’s treated just as if it was a regular layover of a couple of hours
    4) It’s a very short flight to/from Scotland from Iceland, and there are at least two hub cities (we’ve used Glasgow & Aberdeen, not sure about Edinburgh).

  53. 53.

    Citizen Alan

    @Mnemosyne:

    There are few things as startling to me as people who appear to be of Asian descent but who speak with a very thick Southern twang.

  54. 54.

    opiejeanne

    @cosima: We’ve flown Iceland Air twice to Europe. The fares are good and the flights are shorter than anyone else’s flying out of Seattle, and the planes are nice. One of these trips we are going to take them up on that offer to stay longer at no extra cost, although perusing the list of traditional foods left us uninspired.

  55. 55.

    cosima

    @opiejeanne: We definitely didn’t go for the food! I don’t eat seafood of any type, so that narrowed my choices even further. Rejkavik (spelling? too lazy to google) is a small interesting city, and there are many interesting places to visit. If you go in the winter you escape the tourist crowds, and also have a chance to see their amazing northern lights. As I was born & raised in Alaska I’ve seen a lot of northern lights, and theirs were the most amazing that I’ve seen to date. You could also hit the hot springs without the hordes, and perhaps for a more reasonable price. We’ve never done that, but heard that it’s quite expensive, and so many go that you get a time slot for a steep fee. Which sort of negates the point of chilling in the hot springs… Hot springs are another thing that I’ve experienced plenty of times, so didn’t feel like I was missing anything by not going.

    Iceland Air is amazing — I do my best to get the word out, as it deserves more love, esp when compared with other carriers. Come to Scotland, stop in Iceland on the way & stay a while there, I’ll show you around our corner of the Highlands.

  56. 56.

    J R in WV

    @Citizen Alan: Louisana shrimpers from a VietNamese heritage. OMG funny when they start to talk.

    I have to say, LA is probably the best deep south state. NOLA is so great, and even just driving through the few times we have, people were nice.

    That airport at Alexandria, LA we landed there once because our Continental flight to Houston hit unexpected head winds and we ran out of gas. So pilots landed there to fuel up a little. We asked each other if there would be a hat passed for money, or if the pilots had a card.

    Then we asked each other if they were gonna fill up, or just get $500 to get us to Houston.

    Then we landed, and taxied for what seemed to be miles to a tiny terminal – through the piney woods of rural LA. Past at least a couple of dozen anonymous aircraft with no insignia, painted white, or grey, no windows, just the FAA required aircraft numbers.

    Now, looking at that airport with Google Earth, it looks nothing like the airport we landed at, and took off from, back when we were making frequent flight from CRW to Houston, while Dad was a leukemia patient at M D Ahderson.

    I thought at the time that those anonymous aircraft were Air America planes, a company that was well known to be a CIA tool. Maybe they’re at a military base now, after all the post 9-11-2001 spook BS. Opinions?

    The planes were backed up into the woods, tails into the woods, a wide variety of aircraft types, unlike most airfreight or regular airlines, who try to pick a couple of aircraft to do their job. Strange to see that back then, and all gone now…

  63. 63.

    MoxieM

    If you’re leaving from the Northeast (I go to Germany a fair bit), my summary is: IcelandAir has more leg room but you pay for the crummy food. Customs on arrival home. (Also, Keflavik, the airport, is growing so fast they are adding terminals at a rate that they can’t always include seating….if you like to sit while waiting for your connecting flight, that’s a thought.)

    Aer Lingus: a bit less leg room, they provide you with crummy food, but you clear customs in Dublin on the US bound leg, which saves time and aggro. (Or you used to, I haven’t flown Aer Lingus since the Time of Trump…).

    The prices are generally within $100 of each other–I go with which ever one is cheaper at the moment.

  65. 65.

    Barney

    I think that the title “the dumbest man on the internet” should be taken from Jim Hoft and awarded to Trump. He is even more gullible than Hoft, and increasingly uses the excuse “I saw it somewhere on the internet”, while using Twitter to squeeze out what passes for thoughts in his tiny mind.

Comments are closed.