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You are here: Home / John Cole Presents "This Fucking Old House" / In Addition to the Number of Women in the Niagara Falls Area

In Addition to the Number of Women in the Niagara Falls Area

by John Cole|  February 22, 20179:02 pm| 154 Comments

This post is in: John Cole Presents "This Fucking Old House"

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So the lady friend was rather upset that many of you were under the impression that the dogs do not like her, which is my fault because when I was calling Rosie and Thurston assholes, it seemed to imply they were assholes because they do not like her. That’s not the case- they’re just assholes because they are all up in her grill like they are with me and everyone else. Thurston is particularly relentless (and she loves him the best for some reason). At any rate, proof:

That’s the two top fillies in my herd getting along famously. At any rate, we (that’s a royal we, because other than drill the hole in the bottle I have done nothing) are making lamps out of bottles because apparently to the person in this house who isn’t used to living in a cave, the lighting situation here is horrible, in that I do not really own any lamps. She’s also enjoying a fabulous margarita because it is National Margarita day, and one of the perks of dating an alcoholic is they know how to make a mean drink.

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Reader Interactions

154Comments

  1. 1.

    Baud

    February 22, 2017 at 9:06 pm

    Does she support Baud! 2020!?

  2. 2.

    Ohio Mom

    February 22, 2017 at 9:07 pm

    Whatever your name is, Welcome. We are glad to meet you.

  3. 3.

    stinger

    February 22, 2017 at 9:07 pm

    If she laughs at being called a filly in your herd, she’s a keeper!

  4. 4.

    ribber

    February 22, 2017 at 9:07 pm

    longtime lurker myself, but when you made the announcement the other day, I swear my first thought was to tease with “She’s lives in Canada. We met in Niagara Falls. You wouldn’t know her. ” That’s hilarious

  5. 5.

    p.a.

    February 22, 2017 at 9:08 pm

    poor bastard: meet a woman immediately after finishing a home renovation. what needs re-doing? if just lighting you’re getting off easy.

  6. 6.

    Baud

    February 22, 2017 at 9:09 pm

    @Ohio Mom: I’m pretty sure Cole hasn’t told her about us yet, since they haven’t broken up.

  7. 7.

    ET

    February 22, 2017 at 9:10 pm

    Glad there is a reasonable sense of harmony. And that maybe she can bring some more style into your life now that you have a cool house.

  8. 8.

    Oatler.

    February 22, 2017 at 9:11 pm

    She might learn really fast that poor lighting is better than a well lit…cave.

  9. 9.

    p.a.

    February 22, 2017 at 9:11 pm

    @Baud: we have to find out what her commenter name is so we can be nice and not eff it up for john.

  10. 10.

    Mike J

    February 22, 2017 at 9:11 pm

    Niagara Falls? Slowly I turn…….

  11. 11.

    p.a.

    February 22, 2017 at 9:12 pm

    i think the squirt bottle is for when cole misbehaves.

  12. 12.

    Gin & Tonic

    February 22, 2017 at 9:12 pm

    I didn’t get to say this the other day, but I am very happy for you, Cole.

  13. 13.

    Iowa Old Lady

    February 22, 2017 at 9:13 pm

    That is a brave woman

  14. 14.

    Alain the site fixer

    February 22, 2017 at 9:14 pm

    @Baud: I KNEW I had done something wrong when I wrote that. I shan’t make the mistake again!

  15. 15.

    Corner Stone

    February 22, 2017 at 9:15 pm

    This will not end well.

  16. 16.

    Honus

    February 22, 2017 at 9:15 pm

    Nice to see you tidied the place up for her, Cole.

  17. 17.

    efgoldman

    February 22, 2017 at 9:15 pm

    @stinger:

    If she laughs at being called a filly in your herd, she’s a keeper!

    I dunno’. I’d expect her to slap him upside the head and walk out. Both mrs efg and my daughter would.

  18. 18.

    Nappy

    February 22, 2017 at 9:16 pm

    Hilarious

  19. 19.

    debbie

    February 22, 2017 at 9:16 pm

    That margarita looks fluorescent. Yikes!

  20. 20.

    Nappy

    February 22, 2017 at 9:16 pm

    Hilarious

  21. 21.

    p.a.

    February 22, 2017 at 9:16 pm

    http://exdfi.tumblr.com/post/157593034115

    just don’t use this lamp in the house

  22. 22.

    Jim, Foolish Literalist

    February 22, 2017 at 9:17 pm

    That’s the two top fillies in my herd getting along famously

    Well, Cole, I hope you enjoyed having a lady-friend…..

  23. 23.

    schrodingers_cat

    February 22, 2017 at 9:17 pm

    Most important question, does she like the pink room? Or is it too girly for her?

  24. 24.

    ArchTeryx

    February 22, 2017 at 9:18 pm

    Large bonus points for the Breakfast Club reference. Saw that movie when I was a teenager and I felt intensely for those kids even back then…part of what makes me a liberal today.

  25. 25.

    schrodingers_cat

    February 22, 2017 at 9:18 pm

    @efgoldman: He asking for that bottle/lamp upside his head.

  26. 26.

    SiubhanDuinne

    February 22, 2017 at 9:20 pm

    She looks smart and caring, and is very pretty. You done good, John.

  27. 27.

    Steve in the ATL

    February 22, 2017 at 9:20 pm

    @efgoldman:

    I dunno’. I’d expect her to slap him upside the head and walk out. Both mrs efg and my daughter would.

    They sound nice. No sarcasm–my wife would probably set me on fire in my sleep.

  28. 28.

    Schlemazel

    February 22, 2017 at 9:23 pm

    @Baud:
    Who doesn’t?

  29. 29.

    Geeno

    February 22, 2017 at 9:23 pm

    Well the senior females must get along or there will be no peace in the house. It’s good to see the alphas playing nice.

    Also, Lily is so freaking adorable is crazy. I was always glad you two found each other, now i can be glad you three have found each other.

  30. 30.

    Simon Taverner

    February 22, 2017 at 9:25 pm

    She’s gorgeous, you sly dog. No wonder you wanted to post a picture!

    Live every moment, you magnificent bastard!

  31. 31.

    Ben Cisco (onboard the Defiant)

    February 22, 2017 at 9:25 pm

    @Mike J:… step by step…

  32. 32.

    joel hanes

    February 22, 2017 at 9:26 pm

    Niagara Falls

    Slooowwwly I turned.
    Step by step.
    Inch by inch.

    ETA: Ben Cisco beat my by that much

  33. 33.

    J R in WV

    February 22, 2017 at 9:27 pm

    @Baud:

    Yeah, if she know about https://www.ballon-juice.com John would be screwed.

    Also, too, I hate overhead lighting, always have since I was a tiny boy. Unless it’s widespread. Now we have a ton of track-lights in the great room, mostly floods on art, but some down lamps on the counters. But for reading, I want a lamp right by me, lighting the reading material. So….. whatever.

    Making new lamps is smart, financially acute, and creative, so all good!!

  34. 34.

    Schlemazel

    February 22, 2017 at 9:28 pm

    I worked in TV for a very brief time. We needed to get some video of a dog ‘loving’ a person & the dog was not thrilled. I got the idea to run a McDonalds ‘beef’ patty on her neck & got some great tape of the dog just loving the heck out of the talent.

    Jus sayin,

    Come on JC, I’m yanking your chain here. I’m very happy for you.

  35. 35.

    bigfatdrunk

    February 22, 2017 at 9:28 pm

    I’ve been reading this blog (mostly lurking) for a damn long time, and I don’t think I’ve seen a post that’s made me happier.

  36. 36.

    aimai

    February 22, 2017 at 9:29 pm

    She looks lovely, JC. Does she know how many yentas and kibitzers you have lined up staring over the virtual garden fence at this romance?

  37. 37.

    jl

    February 22, 2017 at 9:30 pm

    I can assure the poor persecuted and long suffering Mr. Cole that when he wrote that Thurston and Rosie (especially Rosie) were assholes, I read that as meaning that they were simply assholes.

    OK, not quite true. I read it as meaning they were assholes specifically to Cole, since he always has at least one pet which is always very mean to him all the time and makes his life a living hell and constant nightmare. That is some kind of law of nature. It think I saw a TedTalk on the phenomenon, but don’t have the link right now.

  38. 38.

    Garbo

    February 22, 2017 at 9:30 pm

    Happy to see you happy.

  39. 39.

    Yarrow

    February 22, 2017 at 9:31 pm

    Lily is the bestest. Glad they get along.

  40. 40.

    SiubhanDuinne

    February 22, 2017 at 9:32 pm

    I just looked closely at the right-hand side of the photo, and I very much fear those are John Cole’s feet.

    If gorgeous mystery woman is willing to hang around after being exposed to those, she is a strong and brave person, and deserves all our love and support.

  41. 41.

    CB in Natick

    February 22, 2017 at 9:32 pm

    If you’re going to talk about her in a post, I think you have to give her name. It doesn’t have to be her real name. You could refer to her as Niagara. Or, Ms. Falls. Or, Canada. You know, almost anything. It will make putting sentences together about her a whole lot easier.

  42. 42.

    Baud

    February 22, 2017 at 9:33 pm

    I like the video of the protest in the background.

  43. 43.

    Tazj

    February 22, 2017 at 9:33 pm

    Lily looks enamored, so cute. The lady is beautiful. I’m sure the animals are loving the extra attention.
    In other news, my kids are on vacation and driving me crazy. My husband has the night shift at the hospital and is a total grump,not that I blame him.

  44. 44.

    amk

    February 22, 2017 at 9:34 pm

    dood, don’t you think somethings are best kept private instead of feeding it to the ingrate jackals around here?

  45. 45.

    Mnemosyne

    February 22, 2017 at 9:34 pm

    @Geeno:

    “Two women in the house. And one of them a redhead.”

  46. 46.

    geg6

    February 22, 2017 at 9:35 pm

    She is lovely, John. And creative, too. Plus I’m with her on the lighting. I hate, hate, hate overhead lighting.

    Lovey is an asshole, too. And we love her all the more for it. So much personality!

  47. 47.

    jl

    February 22, 2017 at 9:36 pm

    @amk:

    ” dood, don’t you think somethings are best kept private instead of feeding it to the ingrate jackals around here? ”

    No one around here gives a shit about Cole’s feet. We try to avoid the subject, even though they show up in too many of his pics.

  48. 48.

    Diana

    February 22, 2017 at 9:38 pm

    Ok if you do make your own lamps then let me recommend you spend your money on LED bulbs that change color because it is just so awesome to have control over the color of your light. I use phillips’ hue light bulbs but life does the same thing & got a great review in cnet.

  49. 49.

    Darkrose

    February 22, 2017 at 9:39 pm

    Very happy for you and your lady.

  50. 50.

    Baud

    February 22, 2017 at 9:39 pm

    @p.a.:

    we have to find out what her commenter name is so we can be nice and not eff it up for john.

    It’s NR.

  51. 51.

    Jim, Foolish Literalist

    February 22, 2017 at 9:40 pm

    @CB in Natick: “SHE”?

  52. 52.

    rikyrah

    February 22, 2017 at 9:40 pm

    Awe…so sweet, Cole????

  53. 53.

    RoonieRoo

    February 22, 2017 at 9:42 pm

    1) She is beautiful and I am still giggling with happiness over this development.
    2) You deserve a withering stare for the filly comment because that is exactly what I would give Grumpy…..followed by a kiss for being cute.

  54. 54.

    p.a.

    February 22, 2017 at 9:42 pm

    1) does she know about naked floormopping yet?
    2) if she finds the mustard does john buy a ring?

  55. 55.

    Mnemosyne

    February 22, 2017 at 9:42 pm

    @SiubhanDuinne:

    If they’re already at the comfy slipper phase, it’s only a matter of time.

  56. 56.

    lollipopguild

    February 22, 2017 at 9:43 pm

    Proof of life.

  57. 57.

    Baud

    February 22, 2017 at 9:44 pm

    @SiubhanDuinne: If those are John’s legs, who’s taking the picture?

  58. 58.

    SiubhanDuinne

    February 22, 2017 at 9:45 pm

    @Baud:

    Footselfie.

  59. 59.

    jl

    February 22, 2017 at 9:46 pm

    @Baud: We know Cole has a talent for taking impossibly weird pics.

  60. 60.

    middlelee

    February 22, 2017 at 9:47 pm

    Overhead lighting. There is no rule that says because you have it it must be on. However, when you need/want to vacuum, overhead lighting is the best.

  61. 61.

    SiubhanDuinne

    February 22, 2017 at 9:47 pm

    @Diana:

    Pretty sure John just relies on his lava lamps from the ’70s.

  62. 62.

    Baud

    February 22, 2017 at 9:48 pm

    @middlelee: Cole’s more of a mopper.

  63. 63.

    waysel

    February 22, 2017 at 9:49 pm

    “It’s NR.” Hilarious, Baud.

  64. 64.

    Aleta

    February 22, 2017 at 9:51 pm

    So … She likes animals, she’s creative, she has flair. She’s practical. Energetic likely. Brave, probably bold. Lamps out of bottles.

  65. 65.

    J R in WV

    February 22, 2017 at 9:52 pm

    If you are laying back in a chair and using a wide angle camera lens, feet are almost a requirement, given the laws of optics.

  66. 66.

    Corner Stone

    February 22, 2017 at 9:52 pm

    @CB in Natick:

    I think you have to give her name. It doesn’t have to be her real name. You could refer to her as Niagara. Or, Ms. Falls.

    “Ms. Falls” is Cole’s pen name, obviously.

  67. 67.

    p.a.

    February 22, 2017 at 9:53 pm

    @Corner Stone:

    “Ms. Falls” is Cole’s pen name, obviously.

    I always thought it was ‘thud’

  68. 68.

    SFBayAreaGal

    February 22, 2017 at 9:55 pm

    Fillies? If she stays around after that she’s a keeper. Yay to the both of you.

  69. 69.

    kindness

    February 22, 2017 at 9:56 pm

    Cute! Your lady friend is nice too. Yes & never let her read this blog. She’ll hate us by our snark.

  70. 70.

    efgoldman

    February 22, 2017 at 9:57 pm

    @middlelee:

    However, when you need/want to vacuum, overhead lighting is the best.

    Don’t some vacuum cleaners come with headlights?

  71. 71.

    Olivia

    February 22, 2017 at 9:58 pm

    @Ben Cisco (onboard the Defiant): …Inch by inch…

  72. 72.

    efgoldman

    February 22, 2017 at 9:59 pm

    @kindness:

    never let her read this blog. She’ll hate us by our snark.

    Who could hate this face?

  73. 73.

    quakerinabasement

    February 22, 2017 at 10:02 pm

    Howdy from Colorado, ma’am.

  74. 74.

    J R in WV

    February 22, 2017 at 10:02 pm

    @efgoldman:

    I see you being snarky on other places, so watch it!!

  75. 75.

    Corner Stone

    February 22, 2017 at 10:04 pm

    Where is Joy Reid on this MSNBC Trump panel? She better be in there somewhere.

  76. 76.

    Diana

    February 22, 2017 at 10:04 pm

    @Diana: sorry meant to type lifx I think I got bit by the autocorrect. Comparison here: http://smarthomesolver.com/reviews/lifx-vs-hue-comparison
    And, like other people here, I also hate overhead lighting. One of the advantages of an old house is you just use lamps, which is life as it should be — none of that hideous can lighting that is so ubiquitous in modern construction.

    And if you’re painting walls various colors, the color of the light really matters. You can change the whole look of the room by changing the color of the bulb – bring out the color, tone it down, etc.

  77. 77.

    efgoldman

    February 22, 2017 at 10:04 pm

    @J R in WV:

    I see you being snarky on other places, so watch it!!

    I am Balloon Juice. Thou shalt have no other blogs before me.

  78. 78.

    Aleta

    February 22, 2017 at 10:06 pm

    Lets her hair down. Sensitive to the lighting, therefore to environment, shapes and shadows. Or maybe to theater. Lily mesmerized, adores her. Strong or tough, and full of beauty.

  79. 79.

    Olivia

    February 22, 2017 at 10:07 pm

    She looks lovely, but can she make you a “Home Crap Home” needlework?

  80. 80.

    John Weiss

    February 22, 2017 at 10:07 pm

    John,

    Good on you! I’m sure that we all would like to hear from the lady.

    No pressure.

    jw

  81. 81.

    divF

    February 22, 2017 at 10:08 pm

    Congratulations, Mr. Cole. Although “filly” would get me slapped upside the head by Madame, followed by decades of oblique snarky comments in the most embarrassing settings possible.

    Next up: Adam Silverman?

  82. 82.

    J R in WV

    February 22, 2017 at 10:08 pm

    Actually, she is quite nice looking, and the house is pretty neat for a just rebuilt and moved into house, really!!

    And her help (or someone’s help!) with lamps will be critical to making the house livable!

  83. 83.

    efgoldman

    February 22, 2017 at 10:13 pm

    @J R in WV:

    she is quite nice looking

    What’s the catch? There has to be a catch.

  84. 84.

    Omnes Omnibus

    February 22, 2017 at 10:13 pm

    Please tell us you ran this past her before posting.

  85. 85.

    khead

    February 22, 2017 at 10:14 pm

    This is a just a great pic.

    You are lucky she’s not cutting you or the dogs.

  86. 86.

    Corner Stone

    February 22, 2017 at 10:15 pm

    It’s pretty obvious that Lily is passively protecting Cole from the cray. Steve is simply waiting.
    Waiting.

  87. 87.

    guachi

    February 22, 2017 at 10:18 pm

    What news network is that?

    I can make out on the headline is “Angry Crowds Pack GOP Town Halls Across America” but I can’t make out what network it is.

  88. 88.

    zhena gogolia

    February 22, 2017 at 10:21 pm

    My husband never reads the blog but he had to come over and see. “This is big news!”

  89. 89.

    opiejeanne

    February 22, 2017 at 10:21 pm

    @Corner Stone: I’m missing Lawrence O’Donnell. He was on vacation for the past two weeks and I need more of him. Not interested in watching Tweety tonight.

  90. 90.

    opiejeanne

    February 22, 2017 at 10:23 pm

    @Diana: In the kitchen small can lights are great if you have enough of them. I need to see what I’m doing and I’m not quite ready for the cataract operation yet, so bright lighting is a necessity.

  91. 91.

    Mnemosyne

    February 22, 2017 at 10:25 pm

    In other relationship news, my brother in law’s new boyfriend is meeting the Illinois family tonight. I tried to reassure my BIL that as long as the guy is gainfully employed and not a convicted felon, it’ll be fine. His mother is just relieved that it looks like he may not die alone after all.

  92. 92.

    SiubhanDuinne

    February 22, 2017 at 10:25 pm

    @Omnes Omnibus:

    Please tell us you ran this past her before posting.

    I keep thinking she’s someone we all might know reasonably well as a commenter — maybe a long-time lurker who recently came to life IYKWIMAITYD — who is laughing her ass off at all of us for our wonderment.

  93. 93.

    La Caterina (Mrs. Johannes)

    February 22, 2017 at 10:26 pm

    She’s lovely Cole. Reminds me of me 20 years ago. . .

  94. 94.

    Corner Stone

    February 22, 2017 at 10:27 pm

    @SiubhanDuinne: Doubtful.

  95. 95.

    opiejeanne

    February 22, 2017 at 10:27 pm

    @Omnes Omnibus: Good question.

    I missed the announcement of this new event. I hope it lasts and is good for both of them, and for all of the beasts.

  96. 96.

    SiubhanDuinne

    February 22, 2017 at 10:28 pm

    @opiejeanne:

    I’m in the same place. I have growing cataracts but they are slow to ripen so it seems I’m not ready for the surgery quite yet.

    I do a lot of writing, by hand, with ink pens, on actual pieces of paper. Direct overhead lighting is horrible — it casts the shadow of my hand on the paper so I can’t see what I’m writing.

  97. 97.

    Omnes Omnibus

    February 22, 2017 at 10:29 pm

    @SiubhanDuinne: I know how I would behave in that situation. Certainly no photos without explicit permission.

  98. 98.

    zhena gogolia

    February 22, 2017 at 10:29 pm

    @SiubhanDuinne:

    I don’t think she’s a commenter here. He said he met her on Twitter.

  99. 99.

    Shana

    February 22, 2017 at 10:29 pm

    @opiejeanne: I had cataract surgery on on both eyes about 3-4 years ago. It can seem intimidating, but it’s actually pretty easy and quick recovery.

  100. 100.

    Jim, Foolish Literalist

    February 22, 2017 at 10:29 pm

    @La Caterina (Mrs. Johannes): I keep thinking she’s someone we all might know reasonably well as a commenter —

    Baud already did it with NR, but this just begs for snarky replies. I don’t want to insult the young lady I don’t know…. Oh, the restraint hurts.

  101. 101.

    Lyrebird

    February 22, 2017 at 10:29 pm

    @Mnemosyne: YAY for MnemBIL!

    YAY for happy good-natured Mom-In-Laws too!

    and hey,
    @Omnes Omnibus: Well with the law degree and all, I’d guess you are/were an officer, but here we see further evidence that you’re also a gentleman.

  102. 102.

    SiubhanDuinne

    February 22, 2017 at 10:30 pm

    @Corner Stone:

    Doubtful.

    But isn’t it pretty to think so?

  103. 103.

    SiubhanDuinne

    February 22, 2017 at 10:32 pm

    @Omnes Omnibus:

    I know how I would behave in that situation. Certainly no photos without explicit permission.

    I trust John to do the Right Thing.

  104. 104.

    Omnes Omnibus

    February 22, 2017 at 10:33 pm

    @SiubhanDuinne: Yes, I will concur with that.

  105. 105.

    efgoldman

    February 22, 2017 at 10:34 pm

    @Omnes Omnibus:

    Certainly no photos without explicit permission.

    Not everyone is a lawyer.

  106. 106.

    Omnes Omnibus

    February 22, 2017 at 10:36 pm

    @efgoldman: That’s not from being a lawyer. That’s from having had previous relationships with women.

  107. 107.

    Villago Delenda Est

    February 22, 2017 at 10:38 pm

    Look, if she gets along with Thurston, she’s a keeper, John.

  108. 108.

    Villago Delenda Est

    February 22, 2017 at 10:40 pm

    @Corner Stone: Steve knows the virtue of patience. Thurston has no such knowledge.

  109. 109.

    different-church-lady

    February 22, 2017 at 10:43 pm

    Forget the house, I’m looking forward to her makeover of the blog.

  110. 110.

    Omnes Omnibus

    February 22, 2017 at 10:44 pm

    @Villago Delenda Est: Thurston understands the importance of “Be here now.”

  111. 111.

    Omnes Omnibus

    February 22, 2017 at 10:44 pm

    @different-church-lady: If we get threaded comments….

  112. 112.

    different-church-lady

    February 22, 2017 at 10:44 pm

    @Villago Delenda Est:

    Steve knows the virtue of patience indifference.

    The only feline superpower, really.

  113. 113.

    Corner Stone

    February 22, 2017 at 10:45 pm

    @Omnes Omnibus:

    Thurston understands the importance of “Be here now.”

    Hence, there’s a reason he is not in that pic.

  114. 114.

    pat

    February 22, 2017 at 10:45 pm

    She’s also enjoying a fabulous margarita because it is National Margarita day, and one of the perks of dating an alcoholic is they know how to make a mean drink.

    Be sure to let us know how this turns out. A drinker and a non-drinker…….. Been there.

  115. 115.

    different-church-lady

    February 22, 2017 at 10:46 pm

    …because other than drill the hole in the bottle…

    Oh, is that what you’re calling it?

  116. 116.

    Steve in the ATL

    February 22, 2017 at 10:47 pm

    @efgoldman:

    Not everyone is a lawyer.

    No, but it feels like this place runs about 60% lawyers.

    Which is about how I’ve been running this month. Sometimes even we big shot litigators phone it in.

    Disclaimer: I am not a big shot, and not even a litigator anymore.

    NB: yes, I know that no one cares. I just felt like typing.

  117. 117.

    Librarian

    February 22, 2017 at 10:50 pm

    “It’s social. Demented and sad, but social.”

  118. 118.

    Omnes Omnibus

    February 22, 2017 at 10:51 pm

    @Steve in the ATL: There are many days where I am about 27%.

  119. 119.

    Corner Stone

    February 22, 2017 at 10:51 pm

    Fucking Charlie Sykes and Hugh Hewitt.
    Son of a bitch.

  120. 120.

    Steeplejack (tablet)

    February 22, 2017 at 10:51 pm

    @opiejeanne:

    Catch up here: “On a Personal Note.”

  121. 121.

    mainmata

    February 22, 2017 at 10:52 pm

    She seems to be a pretty normal person to me albeit with a really huge TV. But just a photo.

  122. 122.

    Omnes Omnibus

    February 22, 2017 at 10:52 pm

    @pat:

    Be sure to let us know how this turns out.

    Charming.

  123. 123.

    Yarrow

    February 22, 2017 at 10:52 pm

    National Margarita Day is today. She’s visiting on a Wednesday when she lives elsewhere? Must be serious.

  124. 124.

    Corner Stone

    February 22, 2017 at 10:59 pm

    @Yarrow:

    National Margarita Day is today.

    That’s an actual thing? I thought Cole was just bullshitting from back when she was there previously.

  125. 125.

    SiubhanDuinne

    February 22, 2017 at 10:59 pm

    @mainmata:

    She seems to be a pretty normal person to me albeit with a really huge TV.

    So that’s what the youngsters are calling it these days.

  126. 126.

    efgoldman

    February 22, 2017 at 11:03 pm

    @Shana:

    I had cataract surgery on on both eyes about 3-4 years ago.

    I had mine done in 2009. When I took my glasses off in the office to use the computer, my officemates couldn’t believe it. I wear glasses now only for driving or other distance reasons.

  127. 127.

    Yarrow

    February 22, 2017 at 11:04 pm

    @Corner Stone: It’s a thing. I saw it mentioned somewhere today. Somewhere else other than this post, I mean.

  128. 128.

    The Lodger

    February 22, 2017 at 11:05 pm

    @ArchTeryx: I caught a Bloom County reference, but I missed Breakfast Club. Fillies in the herd, indeed.

  129. 129.

    Steve in the ATL

    February 22, 2017 at 11:05 pm

    @SiubhanDuinne: I normally don’t have much use for Gwinnett County people (thb, same goes for Forsyth, Cobb, and parts of Dekalb), but your wit has been en fuego lately. That and a couple of bottles of wine have helped me get through the dark evenings since the tragic events of last November.

  130. 130.

    Omnes Omnibus

    February 22, 2017 at 11:07 pm

    @Steve in the ATL:

    a couple of bottles of wine

    You mean per day, right?

  131. 131.

    middlelee

    February 22, 2017 at 11:08 pm

    @efgoldman: After cataract surgery, every woman I know (many, I’m really old) said, “Omigod, I had no idea how filthy my house was.” I had cataract surgery and sometimes, looking at my house, I’m sorry I did.

  132. 132.

    Steve in the ATL

    February 22, 2017 at 11:09 pm

    @Omnes Omnibus:

    a couple of bottles of wine

    You mean per day, right?

    Of course! That wasn’t a serious question, was it? I feel like i don’t even sort of pretend kind of in a way know you on an anonymous almost top 10,000 internet chat board anymore.

  133. 133.

    Omnes Omnibus

    February 22, 2017 at 11:12 pm

    @Steve in the ATL: I was just checking. Out of concern and shit.

  134. 134.

    bearcat

    February 22, 2017 at 11:19 pm

    I have been lurking on this blog since before the Schiavo thing turned John into a reasonable human. I fucking love all of you, but John C especially, and let me be the first one to say…

    YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY! \o/

  135. 135.

    scott alloway

    February 22, 2017 at 11:21 pm

    @Mike J: Step by step…

  136. 136.

    Steve in the ATL

    February 22, 2017 at 11:21 pm

    @Omnes Omnibus: much appreciated. You are known here for your sympathetic bent.

  137. 137.

    Omnes Omnibus

    February 22, 2017 at 11:22 pm

    @Steve in the ATL: Thanks?

  138. 138.

    Ruckus

    February 22, 2017 at 11:34 pm

    @zhena gogolia:
    You’ve seen his twitter feed haven’t you? There’s no way she didn’t know this is his blog. No Way.

  139. 139.

    efgoldman

    February 22, 2017 at 11:36 pm

    @Steve in the ATL:

    You are known here for your sympathetic bent.

    His sympathetic bent what?

  140. 140.

    Seanly

    February 22, 2017 at 11:37 pm

    LOL, I have dogs so I understood what you mean about them being assholes. Not that they are bad or don’t like her, but that your new lady has to conform to the pack.

  141. 141.

    Omnes Omnibus

    February 22, 2017 at 11:37 pm

    @efgoldman: Bend this.

  142. 142.

    SiubhanDuinne

    February 23, 2017 at 12:11 am

    This is one of the best threads EVAH!

  143. 143.

    Gustopher

    February 23, 2017 at 12:12 am

    The puppy seems to like her, so, good enough!

  144. 144.

    wasabi gasp

    February 23, 2017 at 12:42 am

    She doesn’t look like a BJ meatupper.

  145. 145.

    Suffragete City elftx

    February 23, 2017 at 12:43 am

    Awwwww how loverly!

  146. 146.

    patrick II

    February 23, 2017 at 2:42 am

    @guachi:

    msnbc

  147. 147.

    opiejeanne

    February 23, 2017 at 2:53 am

    @Shana: The doc says they aren’t “ripe” yet. And yeah, I’m a bit scared of the procedure.

  148. 148.

    opiejeanne

    February 23, 2017 at 2:58 am

    @Steeplejack (tablet): Thank you. This makes me even happier.

  149. 149.

    Gretchen

    February 23, 2017 at 4:04 am

    She’s very cute, and looks like a nice person. My worry is that a happy Cole won’t be good for as many epic rants. But that’s ok. Cole deserves to be happy. Welcome, Canadian girlfriend!

  150. 150.

    Gretchen

    February 23, 2017 at 4:15 am

    @SiubhanDuinne: Mine were the opposite – I went from being fine to being unable to see in a matter of weeks, it seemed. The surgery was pretty uneventful, although I was one of the two patients my doctor had in her entire life that she had to put out for the surgery, since I’m so weird about letting anyone near my eyes. I’ve been nearsighted my entire life, and now I sometimes forget my glasses because I don’t really need them, even for driving. It’s entirely unexpected but pretty nice. It’s unexpected to have a medical problem be fixed, and have your life be better than it was before you had the medical problem.

  151. 151.

    PaulW

    February 23, 2017 at 7:11 am

    John I just hope you’re not drinking.

  152. 152.

    low-tech cyclist

    February 23, 2017 at 8:37 am

    @The Lodger:

    @ArchTeryx: I caught a Bloom County reference, but I missed Breakfast Club. Fillies in the herd, indeed.

    Yeah, Bloom County was the first thing that came to my mind too. So I’m sharing this strip from 12/31/1981, for everybody’s enjoyment.

    And damn, John, she’s beautiful. Make sure to offer up some incense to whatever deity decided to smile in your direction!

  153. 153.

    The Moar You Know

    February 23, 2017 at 10:03 am

    Be sure to let us know how this turns out. A drinker and a non-drinker…….. Been there.

    @pat: You seem nice. I would suggest your problem is probably not alcohol as such.

    John: good job.

  154. 154.

    My Truth Hurts

    February 23, 2017 at 1:08 pm

    I’m impressed with how quickly you moved into your new house and turned it into a pigsty. Well done, Cole.

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