Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

A consequence of cucumbers

The next time the wall street journal editorial board speaks the truth will be the first.

Every day Vance writes another chapter in the book called “Worst VP Pick Ever”.

Hey Washington Post, “Democracy Dies in Darkness” is supposed to be a warning, not a mission statement.

If senate republicans had any shame, they’d die of it.

Every reporter and pundit should have to declare if they ever vacationed with a billionaire.

Only Democrats have agency, apparently.

I’d hate to be the candidate who lost to this guy.

A thin legal pretext to veneer over their personal religious and political desires.

Relentless negativity is not a sign that you are more realistic.

… riddled with inexplicable and elementary errors of law and fact

Fight them, without becoming them!

We need to vote them all out and restore sane Democratic government.

The arc of history bends toward the same old fuckery.

American History and Black History can not be separated.

White supremacy is terrorism.

“That’s what the insurrection act is for!”

Dear Washington Post, you are the darkness now.

The gop couldn’t organize an orgy in a whorehouse with a fist full of 50s.

My right to basic bodily autonomy is not on the table. that’s the new deal.

I did not have this on my fuck 2022 bingo card.

Every one of the “Roberts Six” lied to get on the court.

I’m sure you banged some questionable people yourself. We’re allowed to grow past that.

I’d like to think you all would remain faithful to me if i ever tried to have some of you killed.

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88Comments

  6. 6.

    mai naem mobile

    I would like Dolt 45 to be Bixbys Great Dane,if you get my drift. Alas, he’s too busy being Putin’s Poodle.

  8. 8.

    PeakVT

    I want a little button that kills anyone who lies to me about healthcare policy.

    That may be wrong but I’m not really caring at this point.

  9. 9.

    The Dangerman

    Off to enjoy one of my last weekends in Humboldt (Eureka/Arcata); any locals or experienced tourists with any fine ideas for the non-obvious things to do (i.e., done Lost Coast, Samoa, Minor Theater, etc.) welcomed and appreciated. Finding some good live music would be cool (and I should give a shout out for the House of Floyd, who put on a fine show locally here a couple weeks ago, though it could be I thought it was fine given it was a Floyd show and I’m sure there was an environmental factor with some of Humboldt’s Finest being used near me).

  12. 12.

    A Ghost to Most

    Cooking a bottom round roast, and basking in the warmth of knowing that my Aspergers son is graduating from CSU next week. Yay!

  13. 13.

    LurkerNoLonger

    GOP Rep. Labrador speaks with constituents upset over health care bill: “Nobody dies because they don’t have access to health care”

    What the fuck is he trying to say here? It can’t possibly be as stupid as it sounds.

  15. 15.

    efgoldman

    @LurkerNoLonger:

    It can’t possibly be as stupid as it sounds.

    Let’s see
    Republiklown – check
    RWNJ – check
    Mouth breathing, knuckle-dragging flying monkey – check
    Delusional – check
    Lying sack of shit – check

    Yup, it can be that stupid. It IS that stupid.

  16. 16.

    The Dangerman

    @LurkerNoLonger:

    “Nobody dies because they don’t have access to health care”

    Everyone has ACCESS to healthcare; now, if they can afford it is entirely different question.

  18. 18.

    trollhattan

    Looks just like my puppy, if puppy had gone through 20 rounds of doggie growth hormone.

  19. 19.

    Ohio Mom

    @A Ghost to Most: From a fellow spectrum parent, Congrats!

    As for what I am doing, it is sucking on zinc lozenges. The cold that has being going around has caught me.

  21. 21.

    HeleninEire

    @efgoldman: Oh hey nice to see you. Remember last night I told U about the WV boy who was talking to me until that pretty girl walked in? Well he’s back tonight and said “Hey I met you last night” He’s actually pretty interesting
    RUT ROH!

    I’ll write again when I an safe in my home. ALONE!!!

  23. 23.

    R-Jud

    It’s 10 PM over here in Brexitstan. I lifted weights today, taught the child to play five-card draw poker, repotted some young succulents that were starting to get crowded in their pots, and cooked a ton of food for the coming week. First day of rain we’ve had in a while, believe it or not, so staying indoors was no trial. Tomorrow we will hunt for tadpoles in the local pond and wash the bedlinens. For now I’m drinking cider and planning to watch the latest episode of The Leftovers.

  24. 24.

    Mnemosyne

    Pausing for lunch in San Luis Obispo (aka SLO) before getting on the Coast Starlight back to LA. It’s way colder here than I expected, but I only have about another half hour before I have to start walking back to the train station. The CS is running on time, so I need to be back in plenty of time to board.

    It turns out this whole “outlining a 90,000 word novel” takes longer than I thought. Who knew? But I feel like I’ve made some really good progress.

    Oh, and a quick shoutout to Ruemara, who wisely advised me to stock up on Gin-Gins ginger lozenges before the trip. They’re definitely helping with the mild motion sickness from the swaying.

  25. 25.

    bemused

    Our two black kitties are sleeping together on a dog bed, head to head, tail to tail, in a heart shape.

  29. 29.

    The Dangerman

    Pausing for lunch in San Luis Obispo…

    Gus’s Grocery has good sandwiches and outdoor seating (and close to station). Del Monte Cafe also good and not much further from station.

    ETA: If you are downtown and need ideas for places, I know the home area well.

  30. 30.

    MobiusKlein

    @The Dangerman: Dangerman, I enjoyed going to Shelter Cove, a small city on the coast, in the Lost Coast area. Kind of drop out of the sky into this little town. Black Sands beach was nice.

  33. 33.

    The Dangerman

    @MobiusKlein:

    I enjoyed going to Shelter Cove.

    Excellent idea! I’ve been meaning to go there but the rains here have been rather continuous; might do that tomorrow.

  34. 34.

    NotMax

    Wow. Six hours of sleep uninterrupted by either sinuses or bladder. Red letter day.

    Drove the very elderly landlady to an eye doctor appointment yesterday. After she was done, the string of “Oh by the way, while we’re in town, could you stop at [fill in the blanks]” turned it into a half-day excursion.

    (Today she’s driving herself in to the exact same clinic to see a different doctor to have him/her look at her swollen ankle.)

  35. 35.

    LurkerNoLonger

    @LurkerNoLonger: There’s an invisible link there to the front page of my local paper. Long story short: Faso voted for AHCA and people are pissed.

  36. 36.

    efgoldman

    @LurkerNoLonger:

    Faso voted for AHCA and people are pissed.

    And he refuses to talk to constituents, right? Dem from adjacent district has “adopted” them?
    Is there a viable Dem candidate for the district, or is it one of those New York State things where they cede things to the Republiklowns for… reasons?

    ETA: The link isn’t invisible; you put it on the “Reply” button.

  37. 37.

    dance around in your bones

    Ha! Remember when Cole put up a photo of Lily right after he got her (or she got him!) ??
    He photo-shopped or airbrushed out her girly bits – and how us jackals howled with laughter!
    ;)

  38. 38.

    A Ghost to Most

    @gene108:
    Thanks all. It has been a long pull, and CSU has been great for him.

    Of course, he wanted a Nintendo Switch for his grad present, and to get one right now, to you have to pay a significant markup. Worth it.

  41. 41.

    Nicole

    Home watching the Kentucky Derby. I had surgery on Thursday, so I’m on enforced rest. Fun fact I learned yesterday- my discharge papers said to call the doctor if I spiked a fever over 101. By 8:30 mine climbed to 100.7 and I felt terrible, so I figured I should ring. The surgeon told me that it was likely due to having been on my stomach for a portion of the surgery- that my lungs hadn’t fully expanded since surgery and that can trigger a fever. He recommended breathing exercises, which I did, and lo and behold, the fever is gone.

    Lungs not being fully opened = low grade fever. Who knew? I didn’t.

  42. 42.

    Felonius Monk

    @LurkerNoLonger:

    Faso voted for AHCA and people are pissed.

    Did you happen to see Rachel last night? She had Maloney from NY-18 on. His office got calls from Faso constituents Because Faso’s office would not answer their phones. Maloney has offered to host a townhall for Faso’s district to explain exactly what Faso voted for. Fun times.

    ETA: I live in NY-21. I might just go with popcorn.

  43. 43.

    Feebog

    Enjoying 82 degrees and a nice breeze in Puerto Vallarta Mexico. Looking forward to an early dinner, and more sunshine tomorrow. Stay frosty Juciers.

  44. 44.

    Felonius Monk

    @efgoldman:

    Is there a viable Dem candidate for the district,

    Zephyr Teachout was the candidate last time against Faso. She was a disaster.

  45. 45.

    bystander

    @LurkerNoLonger:

    What the fuck is he trying to say here? It can’t possibly be as stupid as it sounds.

    The set-up that launched a thousand retorts, many with Groucho somewhere in the background.

    ETA, no matter how we try to get a shot of Buster other than flat out asleep, he somehow always manages to remind you he’s a boy.

  46. 46.

    LurkerNoLonger

    @Felonius Monk: I saw that on here in one of the other threads. Faso deserves all the trolling and grief that can be thrown at him.

    @efgoldman: I haven’t heard of anyone who is challenging him yet. But there’s gotta be someone who wants the job. He’s been uniformally terrible.

  47. 47.

    efgoldman

    @Felonius Monk:

    Zephyr Teachout was the candidate last time against Faso.

    District went to Vermillion Vermin by 6%, too. Are enough people pissed enough?

  49. 49.

    bystander

    I love Baloon Juice. I get more laughs here than any single place. But sometimes it reads like dialogue from an obscure O’Neill play set in the intake waiting room of a hospital emergency ward.

  50. 50.

    SiubhanDuinne

    Yay, I just pulled in a blind draw the horse I would have picked if it were open choice.

    Irish War Cry. Cheer me on, HeleninEire!!

  51. 51.

    efgoldman

    Another goddamned OT NHL playoff game about to happen. And from the replay, off one of the Rangers’ own players, too.
    At least this one won’t go to 300am…

    …will it?

  53. 53.

    p.a.

    Neighbor told me he saw something late night this week, wasn’t sure if it was a fox or coyote, but I realize now I haven’t seen the feral cats that frequent my yard for a while… I know a coyote will take them, don’t think a fox would take an adult feral unless desperate.

  55. 55.

    Ohio Mom

    @Nicole: Ninkenpoops. They should have given you the breathing exercises BEFORE they discharged you. Where was the respiratory tech with the clear plastic thingamajig you blow into?

    (Grumbling as I remember all the things my surgical team forgot to tell me).

  58. 58.

    efgoldman

    @efgoldman: [No permission to edit. I HATE that!! Alain, you around?]

    You’d think that coaches would practice six on five / goalie pulled situations the same way they practice ordinary penalty killing.
    You’d think.
    It’s happened much too often in these playoiffs.

  64. 64.

    Jay C

    @efgoldman:

    And he refuses to talk to constituents, right? Dem from adjacent district has “adopted” them?
    Is there a viable Dem candidate for the district, or is it one of those New York State things where they cede things to the Republiklowns for… reasons?

    Faso’s NY-19 is one of those Upstate districts that has been re-jiggered around a lot since the 2010 census: researching the old maps is a pain, but it seems like a lot of it used to be Kirsten Gillibrand’s old district, so it’s not like voting for Democrats is off-the-table there. Especially if Faso can’t – or won’t – deal forthrightly with his constituents’ concerns.
    And yes, Sean Maloney’s “town-hall” trolling is inspired!

  67. 67.

    Adam L Silverman

    @efgoldman: It will now. I nodded off last night just before the winning goal was scored and was startled awake by the cheering.

  68. 68.

    Montanareddog

    At a Surinami Indian birthday party in Amsterdam. Lots of drink, spicy food, Bhangra and dad dancing.

  69. 69.

    Elmo

    Today was supposed to be bathroom sanding and painting, maybe curtain hanging, but Mrs. Elmo is still whacked from Wednesday’s physical therapy so no work. So instead I cooked.

    Pork shoulder in the crockpot with onions garlic and jalapeño.
    Chicken breasts turned into eggrolls and fried rice.
    Flourless chocolate cake.

    But I tend to sip adult beverages when I cook, so I am Elmo +3 at the moment and the evening is young.

  73. 73.

    Mnemosyne

    @The Dangerman:

    I ended up at Urbane Cafe and only spotted Gus’s on my way back — d’oh! I walked to downtown on a residential street instead of Osos.

  74. 74.

    Ohio Mom

    @Hal: Thanks for that link, it’s an eye-opening and a sobering look into the future; even so, it skirts around what will happen to the traditional Medicaid populations: the elderly in Medicaid nursing homes, low-income moms and children, and adult disabled.

    At the moment, the federal-state matching system allows funding levels to increase; this monstrosity caps the federal contribution and gradually continues to reduce it.

    Of these three groups, I only know about disabled adults. The entire system of group homes/other types of supervised living arrangements, recreation and day programs, agencies providing transportation, etc., rests on Medicaid reimbursements.

  76. 76.

    Felonius Monk

    @Adam L Silverman:

    Bad campaign/campaigner? Wrong type of candidate/bad fit for the district?

    Carpetbagger. I saw some of her ads — they were pretty bad. I don’t think she had a clue what the district is all about.

  78. 78.

    LurkerNoLonger

    @Felonius Monk:

    Carpetbagger

    That was the criticism I heard. I voted for her anyway because she wasn’t a Republican. I also don’t have to be in love with the candidate to vote for him/her, but I’m kooky like that.

  79. 79.

    Quinerly

    @Elizabelle:
    ?. Poco was chasing crabs on the beach the other night at midnight. Luckiest ex inner city street dog ever. I need to ask him if he misses train watching at La Posada.

  80. 80.

    Nicole

    @Ohio Mom: They gave me one for the first surgery in November, but all I heard from them about this one was that it was “so much easier than the last one.” I still had the plastic thingy, though, so I pulled it out last night.

    Mostly I’m just annoyed at the anesthesiologist- I told her I have trouble with gas anesthesia- it makes me really sick, but she said they were still using it for safety. Even though the anesthesiologist I had in November didn’t resort to it because he took my nausea comments seriously. And, once again, it made me ill. The doctors had to shout at me repeatedly to get me to wake up and I was sick as a dog the rest of the day.

  81. 81.

    efgoldman

    @Felonius Monk:

    I don’t think she had a clue what the district is all about.

    Is she now going to be a perpetual candidate, after flaming out statewide vs ::retch:: Cuomo, and now in the district?

  82. 82.

    David Spikes

    @LurkerNoLonger: Chris Collins aka Trump’s ass wipe, has got to go. I would consider moving from NV. to NY to vote against him. 10,000 times scum.

  83. 83.

    David Spikes

    @Felonius Monk: Berniebros-and others-were so certain of her total fabulosity that no real knowledge of the area was needed. People who are so totally convinced of their own virtue are scary.

  85. 85.

    Kelly

    Nothing like anxiety over the Trumpcare bill to energize me to do some housework. Vacuumed, mopped, cleaned up the kitchen and both bathrooms. I really do feel better now. Do something simple and useful.

  86. 86.

    J R in WV

    @Feebog:

    Curse you!!

    The high here today was 53, and now its 43 and rainy.

    Plus car over the hill, no damage or injury, just clustered all afternoon.

    Curse Republicans, and Fuck LBJ, and George W.

  87. 87.

    laura

    @The Dangerman: Cheese! Get yourself a fresh wedge of Humboldt Fog, with the nice blue line straight on through. Some crackers or thin sliced bread, a few nuts, some grapes. Man, that’s what you should be doing in the North Coast.

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