Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

Wow, you are pre-disappointed. How surprising.

Technically true, but collectively nonsense

Republican obstruction dressed up as bipartisanship. Again.

Motto for the House: Flip 5 and lose none.

Within six months Twitter will be fully self-driving.

I’d like to think you all would remain faithful to me if i ever tried to have some of you killed.

And now I have baud making fun of me. this day can’t get worse.

I like you, you’re my kind of trouble.

Wow, I can’t imagine what it was like to comment in morse code.

Presidents are not kings, and Plaintiff is not President.

Let’s not be the monsters we hate.

If you’re pissed about Biden’s speech, he was talking about you.

Shallow, uninformed, and lacking identity

Is it negotiation when the other party actually wants to shoot the hostage?

It’s always darkest before the other shoe drops.

Something needs to be done about our bogus SCOTUS.

Why is it so hard for them to condemn hate?

Historically it was a little unusual for the president to be an incoherent babbling moron.

A Senator Walker would be an insult to the state and the nation.

Too often we hand the biggest microphones to the cynics and the critics who delight in declaring failure.

“But what about the lurkers?”

I did not have telepathic declassification on my 2022 bingo card.

… pundit janitors mopping up after the GOP

Not all heroes wear capes.

You are here: Home / Politics / Trumpery / Dolt 45 / Late Night Opposite-of-Nostalgia Open Thread: GUILTY! GUILTY! GUILTY!

Late Night Opposite-of-Nostalgia Open Thread: GUILTY! GUILTY! GUILTY!

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“Out of the loop” worked as an excuse for VP ‘Poppy’ Bush during the Iran-Contra investigation. “In a(n Alzheimers) fog” worked for Reagan. But that was twenty-five years ago, Bush was (however crooked & compromised) smart, and Reagan was popular. “Mike Dense”, as he was known back in Indiana, isn’t even popular with the guy who gave him his current job.

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32Comments

  6. 6.

    westyny

    Pence must not be allowed to escape the net. His “fog” is damning in its unbelievability.

  7. 7.

    seaboogie

    I have reached my outrage limit, and just can’t anymore…

    One of the conservatives who hasn’t quite pegged his outrage meter walked into our artisan jewelry shop today. I actually espied him seeing “jewelry” on our awning, and walking in for his purpose – which was to buy solid gold and silver (?!) for the coming apocalypse.

    Rewind to several minutes before when I was sharing conversation with our local indy bookseller from next door, and said “in good news today, Roger Ailes died!” high-five. He gave me the five, then felt bad about celebrating a death, and then thought about it again, and gave me five more.

    Then this tall, handsome dude came in wanting to buy gold and silver for the coming apocalypse – I learned a lot about accepted Korean haircuts from him (six for men, four for women, and only Kim Jong Un gets to have that weird coif of his.) And eight stories down bunkers for the coming nuclear war, and a bunch of other stuff that was all initials and satellites and pew pew pew. So fuck Roger Ailes and his floppy jowls with a rusty pitchfork. I have no patience left for this nonsense, nor any media that does not expose this insanity to daylight.

  8. 8.

    Splitting Image

    My impression of Pence is that he’s only marginally smarter than Trump himself, so I think it’s completely believable that he failed to absorb enough information to be “inside the loop”.

    On the other hand, I have no problem with seeing them both walk the plank for this. They both took the job claiming to be smart enough to do it, so they should be held accountable as though they are.

  9. 9.

    Elizabelle

    Alexandra Petri is at it again. You must use a WaPost click to view the whole column. Catnip.

    Is Donald Trump a witch?

    … There were people in Salem who got witch-hunted, literally, but they were nobodies and also some of them were women (read: witches!). And that was different. That could not have been political, even if it was used to target financially independent women and people in positions of power in the Massachusetts town. They had not even invented Democrats yet.

    So we must ask: Why is this happening to this man? Why is this witch hunt even taking place? Why do so many people think that Trump is a witch?

    True, he may not think he is a witch. But are there not grounds for suspicion?

    …. Then again, no. He would be a wizard. Witches are nasty women, whereas Trump is a mighty warlock whom we do not adequately appreciate … If he has signed his name in the Devil’s Book, that simply means that the book is now much more valuable and classy.

    Why won’t we leave him alone? Such a hunt is not fair to Trump, who does not have to do this, after all. Clearly, he is not adequately appreciated in the White House, and he should not feel compelled to stay in a place where he is not appreciated.

  12. 12.

    Lord Dingleton

    Mike Pence… the Plan B contraceptive for the Republican party.

    Or maybe he’s just the Anti-Forrest Gump (name any event, and HE WASN’T THERE!), depending on your credulity.

  13. 13.

    Patricia Kayden

    @?BillinGlendaleCA: Denseness is not an excuse for ineptitude. If he should have known something because of the position he holds, he’s responsible for not acting appropriately with that knowledge. Ignorance is no excuse.

    Can you imagine Democrats claiming that they were so dense that they were not aware of crucial information even though there’s proof that they were informed? Me either.

  14. 14.

    Joyce H

    @Splitting Image:

    My impression of Pence is that he’s only marginally smarter than Trump himself, so I think it’s completely believable that he failed to absorb enough information to be “inside the loop”.

    On the other hand, I have no problem with seeing them both walk the plank for this. They both took the job claiming to be smart enough to do it, so they should be held accountable as though they are.

    The great thing about Trump being so damn stupid is that I’m sure he can’t be brought to understand, however often it’s explained to him, that he doesn’t have attorney-client privilege with the White House Counsel. That fact will probably come in handy sooner or later.

  15. 15.

    hellslittlestangel

    How long before the whole world is sick of hearing the “I’m too fucking stupid to form intent to commit a crime” defense?

  21. 21.

    Morzer

    Pence lied frequently and shamelessly during the campaign and I have no doubt that he’s lying now. We shouldn’t give him the benefit of the doubt precisely because he has consistently shown that he doesn’t deserve it throughout his sordid career as a smug, dishonest and vicious theocratic wannabe.

  23. 23.

    Frankensteinbeck

    Echoing @Morzer. Pence is supremely good at repeating what he was told to say, over and over, with no improvisation or sign that he knows he’s lying. He demonstrated this astonishing ability to say black is white in the vice presidential debate. He is that exact level of stupid.

  25. 25.

    Morzer

    Speaking of incompetent liars, frauds and other Republicans, looky here:

    https://www.bloomberg.com/politics/articles/2017-05-18/house-may-be-forced-to-vote-again-on-gop-s-obamacare-repeal-bill

    House Republicans barely managed to pass their Obamacare repeal bill earlier this month, and they now face the possibility of having to vote again on their controversial health measure.

    House Speaker Paul Ryan hasn’t yet sent the bill to the Senate because there’s a chance that parts of it may need to be redone, depending on how the Congressional Budget Office estimates its effects. House leaders want to make sure the bill conforms with Senate rules for reconciliation, a mechanism that allows Senate Republicans to pass the bill with a simple majority.

    Now that’s what I call quality legislatifying.

  26. 26.

    Tony J

    Hopefully helping to nail Pence for his role in aiding and abetting the Kremlin’s takeover of Congress and the White House is a priority for Congressional Dems. I really can’t envisage Boyar Boo-Hoo surviving the IC’s drip-drip-SPLASH campaign for more than a few months, and when he topples its hard to see the higher reaches of his administration not coming down with him.

    I know that the rules of succession will keep cycling through GOP placeholders unless and until there’s a Democrat sitting in the Speaker’s chair, but it can’t be bad politically to be going into the 2018 Mid-Terms facing a mandateless President Pence or Ryan and a GOP Congress half of whom are probably also under investigation.

    If there’s one undoubted and historically significant purpose Comrade Cry-Baby can serve it’s to self-destruct with such force that the expanding shit-storm strips the malcontents in the GOP caucus of their sheen of undeserved credibility. They need to face 2018 and 2020 exposed as exactly who and what they are. Many of them will still win re-election (Tribalism Uber Alles and all that) but you’ve got to think that margins in tightly gerrymandered races will be tilted against the Treason Party just enough to let the tide wash in.

    OTOH, who am I kidding? The second Fishmouth Frack-Up is out on his ear the MSM will do what it always does to balance the scales and go after Democrats with everything they have, but stranger things have happened.

  27. 27.

    Morzer

    The WaPo seems to have noticed that the VP for Straightfaced Lying has a mendacious tendency:

    https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/the-fix/wp/2017/05/18/vice-president-pence-has-a-growing-credibility-problem/

    There are more than a few people who look at Vice President Pence and see President Pence — possibly sooner than later. For wistful Democrats, it would be the end result of President Trump stepping aside or being impeached; for wistful Republicans, some dream of a more serious, less error-prone Republican president actually succeeding at passing a conservative agenda.

    But as The Post’s Abby Phillip began documenting last week, Pence has hardly been immune from Trump’s foibles and from saying untrue things about them. And now twice in the past week, his defenses of the White House he serves in have been pretty directly contradicted in ways that seriously call into question his credibility.

    Below are three big instances in which Pence said something that turned out to be highly misleading at best and clearly false at worst, starting with the newest one.

  28. 28.

    Jake the antisoshul soshulist

    Maybe someone should remind the VP about “bearing false witness”.

  30. 30.

    Wapiti

    @Jake the antisoshul soshulist: I wonder if “bearing false witness against your neighbor” has been parsed in right-wing evangelical circles to mean:

    It’s okay to tell untruths about circumstances, if they don’t involve people.
    It’s okay to tell untruths about people who aren’t in your community or circles of acquaintance, because they aren’t neighbors.
    It’s okay to tell untruths if you aren’t under oath, actually providing a witness statement.
    It’s okay to tell untruths, even under oath, that support your friend, because they aren’t “against” him.
    And even if you tell an untruth, you’ll be forgiven by God because you’ve been born again in his son, Jesus.

  32. 32.

    stinger

    @Wapiti: I watched Pence’s speech at the R nominating convention, and every sentence was a lie. I could hardly believe my ears. Not what “Christian” used to mean.

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