I thought I’d do a follow-up to the oldies thread I did before. First, the good: what are your top 5 Motown songs from all time? I’ll go with
1. You’re All I Need To Get By
2. Band of Gold
3. Nowhere To Hide
4. Papa Was A Rolling Stone
5. Tears Of A Clown
And now for the ugly. I was thinking the other day about what one thing from routine would I like to be different in order for my life to be better. And I realized it would probably be not having to hear so much Michael Bubble Buble when I go grocery shopping. It got me thinking: why is is there so much bad Canadian music? Although Canada has one-tenth the population of the US, I’d say that close to half of the truly awful things on the radio are Canadian. One theory is that production of awful music in a country is proportional to the land mass of the country, not to the population.
So what are the worst Canadian songs of all time?
1. The Bryan Adams song from Don Juan of de DeMarco
2. I Just Haven’t Met You Yet — Michael Bubble Buble
3. My Heart Will Go On — Celine Dion
4. Freewill — Rush
5. The Bryan Adams song from Robin Hood
What are yours?
EdTheRed
The Canadian government has apologized for Bryan Adams on several occasions!
Baud
O Canada.
.
.
I kid, I kid…
dedc79
Worst canadian song is no contest. One Week by the Bare Naked Ladies.
Doug!
@dedc79:
That “I could walk but I’ll just drive” song is worse.
Major Major Major Major
But Russia has like two bands.
ETA: @Doug!: I would be surprised if even BNL likes that song.
Cathie from Canada
But but but — Nickelback! You’ve forgotten Nickelback!
Doug!
@Major Major Major Major:
I feel like Yakov Smirnoff should count somehow.
daverave
Isn’t it Buble, not Bubble?
Doug!
@Cathie from Canada:
I dislike Photograph less than the songs on my list.
Death Panel Truck
Worst Canadian songs? Pretty much everything Rush has ever recorded.
And “Summer of ’69.” It rings totally false, considering Bryan Adams was 12 years old in 1969.
Doug!
@daverave:
You’re probably right.
Major Major Major Major
@Doug!: typo in list item 4 while we’re at it.
vhh
I recognize exactly none of these song titles. Must have lived a protected life.
daverave
Appropriate for the current situation on our planet, The Temps “Ball of Confusion (That’s What the World is Today)” is one of my faves.
dedc79
@Death Panel Truck: Yeah, there’s absolutely nothing in the lyrics to suggest 1969 (or any particular year, for that matter). It’s about 1969 , the way a Hallmark card is about a particular person.
raven
CBO report just dropped, 22 million more than Obamacare.
mai naem mobile
Worst Canadian Song
Anne Murray – I Needed You and anything by Rush. Anything. How do you even twll their songs apart? Just sounds like a bunch of teens learning how to play guitar and they’re really bad at it.
Irony Abounds
Don’t know about “Nowhere to Hide,” but “Nowhere to Run” is a damn good song. Tears of a Clown is great also, hard to pick between it and the other “Tears” song, The Tracks of My Tears. I’d add Let’s Get it On as one of the greatest Motown Hits, and probably put Ain’t No Mountain High Enough ahead of You’re All I Need to Get By.
Forgot to add: Band of Gold is very underappreciated.
Cacti
@Death Panel Truck:
The record company made him change the title to appeal to boomer nostalgia. His original title was “Summer of ’75”.
JPL
Score is out 22 million without insurance by 2026
Le Comte de Monte Cristo, fka Edmund Dantes
Hands down worst Canuckian – Gordon Lightfoot, Wreck of the Edmund Fitzgerald.
I rate that as awful death schlock in the worst way, along with “Shannon” and “Where oh Where can my baby be” (which I hate for its religiousity and the singer’s facile attempt to shift blame for his own wreckless driving).
Major Major Major Major
@raven: @JPL: So, one million better than the House. See? They’re moderates.
JPL
@Major Major Major Major: I didn’t see Raven’s comment, but I hope there is more info than just the number. The medicaid cuts after 2025 are devastating.
CNBC just has a few paragraphs.
chris
Sorry for the ear worm folks… Gotta be “Life is a Highway” by Tom Cochrane….
Watch the video… what the hell is he doing to that guitar?
scottinnj
Worst Canadian Songs:
1) Bad Day by Daniel Powter
2) One Week – BNL
3) Mmm Mmm Mmm Mmm – Crash Test Dummies
4) Blurred Lines – Robin Thicke
5) Man I Feel Like a Woman – Shania Twain
Faction
Just a few weeks ago I actually paid attention to the lyrics of Bryan Adams’ “Run To You” and realized it was about a guy who’s trying to rationalize cheating on his wife/gf….
“She says her love for me could never die.
That’d change if she ever found about about you and I”
Oh, but her love is cold…so that makes it okay.
Keith
@raven: Round 1 – 24 million lose insurance, round 2 23 lose theirs, round 3, 22 million lose insurance.
Do you think if they try 23 more times they will end up covering more people?
Cacti
“You Oughta Know” by Alanis Morissette.
A super angst-y break up song…
About Dave Coulier.
Yutsano
How does your Motown list have zero Aretha? Some R.E.S.P.E.C.T. please!
(Yes I spelled her name wrong. Yes I just fixed it.)
joel hanes
Motown too narrow; just an aspect of SoulR&B
wonderful soul songs :
Stevie Wonder : Living Just Enough For The City
Marvin Gaye : What’s Goin’ On
Laura Nyro with Patti LaBelle : The Bells
Ben E King : Stand By Me
Rev. Al Green covering Curtis Mayfield’s People Get Ready
Aretha covering Carole King’s (You Me Feel Like A) Natural Woman
The Undisputed Truth : Smiling Faces
Sam Cooke : Bring It On Home To Me
Otis Redding : Try A Little Tenderness
St. Paul and the Broken Bones : Call Me (youtube vinyl sessions video)
HeleninEire
I was born in 1962. Can’t remember any of the songs. ;)
Butthurt Jordan Trombone (fka XTPD)
Not a song, but Mega Babies is hands down THE worst thing Canada has ever produced, easily, That includes Ted Cruz and the country’s serial killer population.
WaterGirl
So many great Supremes songs, I hardly know which ones to name. My two sisters and I used to do a stirring rendition of Stop In the Name of Love (before you break my heart…)
I would get a kick out of seeing that now, if only there had been video.
JMG
Dancin’ in the Streets has to be on a Motown top five. My favorite Smokey song, and we could have a thread on this just by itself, is “You Really Got a Hold on Me.” Also “I Want You Back” should be in there.
Yutsano
@Butthurt Jordan Trombone (fka XTPD): Blame Canadian media law. 90% of the cartoons that air on Canadian TV must originate in Canada. Teletoon has to crank out the junk in order to meet that demand. Also why Vancouver is a hot bed for animation.
Major Major Major Major
@JPL: I’ll wait for somebody who knows what they’re talking about to weigh in, which knowing the media means I have to wait for the health policy expert at this top-10,000 blog I read (n.b.: actually the 28,157th most popular domain in the world!) to weigh in.
WaterGirl
@joel hanes: I don’t know if Aretha was Motown or not, but I surely loved her singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T in her waitress uniform in the diner scene in The Blues Brothers movie.
@Yutsano: Hadn’t seen your comment before i posted mine. I obviously agree with you.
scottinnj
As for greatest Motown song – and this may be a stretch admittedly to call this Motown ‘sound’ though definitely a Motown artist- “Papa was a Rollin Stone’
Omnes Omnibus
@joel hanes: A fair point. I tend to prefer Stax and the other Memphis labels to Motown. You gotta have Otis.
joel hanes
@Yutsano:
According to Wikipedia, Berry Gordy pitched his record company to Aretha’s manager (her father) when she was about 18, but was turned down.
ThresherK
Tangential to topic: Chiliwack’s Whatcha Gonna Do is infectiously catchy, and the band named themselves after a BC city.
I don’t know at what point we can continue to call Shania Twain’s music “Canadian”. (And I’m not talking about Canadian content laws, hoser.)
Josie
@joel hanes: You forgot:
Percy Sledge: When a Man Loves a Woman
Steve in the ATL
@Faction:
I can forgive the infidelity, but not the grammar mistake
trollhattan
List of bad Canuck songs must necessarily include Loverboy and Guess Who. Celine Dion is their greatest international crime, even ahead of Rush and that’s saying lots.
Marvin Gaye Motown? because “What’s Goin’ On” would be on my list; also, too something by the Four Tops, just not sure which and wasn’t Little Stevie Wonder Motown?
Speaking of the Fitzgerald, the captain and watch crew are utterly fvcked if this proves true.
joel hanes
@Omnes Omnibus:
I love the Philadelphia sound too: my Furth barracks days had an OJays soundtrack.
mai naem mobile
@raven: so what? 400 deserving families got some nice big fat tax cuts because Jeezus thinks they are awesome. And the GOP.
raven
@Keith: They might could. . .
joel hanes
@trollhattan:
something by the Four Tops
Reach Out
Steve in the ATL
@Omnes Omnibus:
Great point. This is why you are regularly considered a top-500 poster here.
JPL
@Major Major Major Major: Yup
Josh says fifteen lose coverage next year, according to the report.
Hopefully Richard/David weighs in soon.
glaukopis
The Ronette’s Be my baby?
mai naem mobile
@joel hanes: I don’t thunk Otis Redding was Motown because I believe his stuff was recorded at Muscle Shoals.
stinger
@Le Comte de Monte Cristo, fka Edmund Dantes: Wreck is a wreck, indeed. Hate that “song”.
joel hanes
@Josie:
acknowledged
Also Staples; maybe “Respect Yourself”
trollhattan
@Omnes Omnibus:
Yup.
Omnes Omnibus
Bad Canuck music: Informer by Snow (the Great White North’s answer to Vanilla Ice).
germy
@WaterGirl:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JC-MDYopSoA
joel hanes
@WaterGirl:
I don’t know if Aretha was Motown or not
Grew up in Detroit, but signed with Columbia and moved to New York.
Queen of Soul regardless.
JoJo
From my perspective, “the Bryan Adams song…” is often all you need to get close to the worst Canada (or 80s pop rock) has to offer.
And Rush. Sweet Lord, why Rush?
trollhattan
@glaukopis:
Phil Spector produced them and also, too, married the lead singer.
piratedan
MoTown top 5 (this is personal taste, ymmv)
The Happening: The Supremes
And Then He Kissed Me: The Crystals
Living For The City: Stevie Wonder
Nowhere to Run: Martha and the Vandellas
Shotgun: Junior Walker and the Allstars
Bad Canadian music:
Saga: On The Loose
Men Without Hats: Safety Dance
Nickleback
secret Canadian bands I adore:
Red Rider
k.d. lang
Doug and the Slugs
raven
@mai naem mobile: Stax , Volt, Atco , Rhino, Sundazed but Atlantic owned his music after he died.
PaulWartenberg
@dedc79:
DON’T YOU DARE IT HAS COOL X-FILES REFERENCES
Just One More Canuck
A country that has produced Achy Breaky Heart, We Built This City, and My Humps is complaining about another country’s music?
Besides, we gave you 4/5 of The Band
Patricia Kayden
I’m insulted as a former Canadian!! How dare you?!! There are no bad Canadian songs.
Why don’t you do a thread on great foreign songs or something more positive? Harumph **stamps away pouting**
PaulWartenberg
@JPL:
what did we expect? ANY plan by the GOP to gut Obamacare would kick millions out of coverage, and kill thousands in the process. >:(
maurinsky
If being by Bryan Adams makes it Canadian, Have You Ever Loved A Woman is terrible in every possible way.
Papa Was A Rolling Stone
My Girl
Superstition
Chain of Fools
Tears of a Clown
Let’s Get It On
Someday We’ll Be Together
raven
My Canadian-American friend always has a big music gig for her birthday and this year it was all Canadian music with many of the tunes mentioned here.
WaterGirl
@germy: Sorry, I wanted the video of my sisters and I signing Stop in the Name of Love!
After watching the beginning of the video at your link, i have to say I am retroactively impressed with my sisters and I. (( know it’s supposed to be “me” now, but the nuns drilled “I” into me and I just can’t let it go.)
I had remembered the obvious “STOP” motion with the arms flinging forward, but now that I’ve seen the video I recall that we also did the wavy arm thing and the hip movements. Clearly I missed my original calling!
tom
@Yutsano: I am going to be that guy on the internet and point out that Aretha did not record for Motowm records – she recorded first for Atlantic and later Arista. But she’s a Detroiter! (as am I).
I love so much Marvin (I Heard it Through the Grapevine, What’s Goin’ On), Smokey (Tears of a Clown, Mama Told Me), Stevie (I Just Called to Say; Signed, Sealed, Delivered; Sir Duke), etc., etc., etc.
Worst Canadian Song – Anne Murray, Snowbird.
Matt McIrvin
@Major Major Major Major: Russia produced the best classical music, though. A lot of it, at least.
Major Major Major Major
@Just One More Canuck: @Patricia Kayden: Bad Canadian music is a distraction! This blog should be focusing on Russia, which is also a distraction from healthcare! Which is also a distraction!
Betsy
Look at this fantastic idea!! “Medicare Part M” (for “middle-aged”)
http://www.samefacts.com/2017/06/health-medicine/after-trumpcare-medicare-part-m/#idc-container
Who can get this into the hands of the Dem strategists??
trollhattan
@joel hanes:
Aretha found her success at Atlantic through Ahmet Ertegun, who insisted she be herself and not packaged as another R&B singer. Her thoughts about him, here.
mai naem mobile
Too many for a.Top 5
Stevie Wonder Signed Sealed Delivered, You’re the Sunshine of My Life, Jammin’
Smokey Robinson – Cruising,Shop Around
Marvin Gaye – What’s going on, Heard it Through the Grapevine
Jr Walker – Shotgun
stinger
Ah, Motown/R&B – Sam Cooke, A Change Is Gonna Come; Temptations, Just My Imagination; Marvin Gaye, I Heard It Through the Grapevine; Martha & the Vandellas, Dancing in the Streets; Aretha, Natural Woman; hard to pick just five!
Steve in the ATL
@raven:
What about Chilliwack’s “Gone So Long”? That’s a guilty pleasure of mine. Like, once every 20 years.
JMG
Gang, Percy Sledge, the Ronettes and the Crystals, all of whom were tremendous, were not Motown artists.
daverave
Sure are a lot of haters here for a band in the R+R Hall of Fame… not that they are one of my top 10 or even 100 R+R bands but somebody must see something in Rush.
Cacti
It’s only fitting that the worst Robin Hood of all-time (Kevin Costner) would have his love theme written by Bryan Adams.
Butthurt Jordan Trombone (fka XTPD)
@Yutsano: Knew about the law, and it was really last decade where its Western animated series were THE WORST. Off the top of my head, the good Canadian series were Ed, Edd and Eddy and Beast Machines (holdovers from the ’90s); X-Men: Evolution, 6teen, Grossology, and the Total Drama franchise.
Though its voice actors (especially Ocean Group/Westwood) are good enough to at least cancel out much of the awfulness.
tom
@tom: For some reason, FYWP won’t let me edit my comment. Anyway, I see others have pointed that Aretha didn’t record for Motown records.
toine
Really? The nation that brought us Creed is throwing rocks at Canada?
joel hanes
@Just One More Canuck:
we gave you 4/5 of The Band
for which I am forever grateful.
Add Levon Helm and you have The Night They Drove Old Dixie Down, one for the ages.
Thanks for Neil Young, too.
Steve in the ATL
@tom:
You forgot “Fingertips”!
Major Major Major Major
@Betsy: Why limit it to the uninsured age group least likely to support Democrats?
DougJ
@Omnes Omnibus:
Oh god I forgot that one
sherparick
The Captain and the Officer of the Deck of the U.S.S. Fitzgerald are both likely heading for a court martial. The Navy, unlike the Air Force, does not protect its own when it comes to risking their ships and their crews.
les
@Cathie from Canada:
And to bottom it all out, I just saw an ad for a new Nickelback album. Maybe it was just a bad acid flashback.
Angrifon
@WaterGirl: Aretha sings “Think” in The Blues Brothers, not “Respect”. But it is an amazing scene.
Keith
My top 5 motown would be
Dancin’ In The Street – Martha Reeves & The Vandellas
Superstition – Stevie Wonder
What’s Goin’ On – Marvin Gaye
I heard it Thru the Grapevine – ibid
Papa Was a Rollin’ Stone – Temptations
Special mention to War – Edwin Starr
Yutsano
@Butthurt Jordan Trombone (fka XTPD): I actually know a few of the people who do voice acting for Ocean (although they’re contractors) but the best example is petite (and very awesome) Marÿke Hendrikse as Revy. Especially since she hardly EVER swears in person!
Cacti
@daverave:
Green Day is also in the R+R hall of fame.
moops
I blame Canadian Content laws in Canada. As a mediocre Canadian band you have a huge advantage against foreign competition in the Canadian market. So, a producer just has to get a passably decent band recorded and you can get time on stations that need to check off there domestic quota rules. It also means that Top 40 stations have to recycle Canadian acts on their airwaves a bajillion times. So the Canadian muzak wings had a leg up since they could license the material pretty cheap and it was familiar to all Canadians, and those states that are within Canadian radio stations.
So, Canadian bands can get through the valley-of-death due to Canadian protectionism. I honestly don’t know how Canadian jazz stations or metal stations manage this. When I DJ’d for a Canadian radio station we had a pretty worn out set of records from Canadian bands that stayed in the booth, and the hallway racks for music from rest of earth.
raven
The night concluded with 5 women dressed in hard hats and reflective vests singing “Safety Dance” and they turned around to reveal the name of the guest of honor spelled out!
Patricia Kayden
@daverave: I love Rush. I can’t even begin to understand the hatred against Rush when you have awful bands like Huey Lewis and the News out there.
les
@Just One More Canuck:
Forgot that. Definitely covers a multitude of sins.
Angrifon
Any list of best Motown songs has to include, “Let’s Get It On” by Marvin Gaye and “Let’s Stay Together” by Reverend Al Green.
raven
@sherparick: That’s because the Air Force doesn’t have ships!
Major Major Major Major
@Cacti: You hate Green Day?
@moops: Huh, interesting, thanks.
joel hanes
No love for The Jacksons ?
SatanicPanic
@Cacti: Green Day is better than half the crap in there. KISS is in the RnR Hall of Fame, they’re the actual worst.
DougJ
@Angrifon:
Rev wasn’t Motown
raven
@Patricia Kayden: Walkin on a Thin Line rocks.
raven
@joel hanes: not here
Keith
@Angrifon: R-E-S-P-E-C-T makes it into Blues Brothers Redux (2000)
DougJ
@joel hanes:
Love them but solo MJ even better
Angrifon
@les: Sure, sure. And Neil Young. What have you done for us lately?
trollhattan
@daverave:
Hey, everyone slips up now and then. Kiss and Neil Diamond are in the R&R HoF.
WaterGirl
@Angrifon: You’re right! You know, I thought about that before I posted and decided that “you better think” were some of the lyrics from RESPECT. Oh well, it was a truly awesome scene. Thanks for the correction!
Butthurt Jordan Trombone (fka XTPD)
Fuck What You Think isn’t awful, but Main Source wasn’t as good without Large Professor (and even with him the group could’ve just as easily been called “Large Professor and Some Assholes.”)
@Yutsano: Their dubs during the ’00s were a lot better than a lot of the country’s native programming.
Turner Hedenkoff
From “The Trip to Italy” —
Rob Brydon: Where do you stand on Michael Buble?
Steve Coogan: His windpipe.
toine
@Patricia Kayden:
not to mention Foreigner, GnR, Van Halen…. shlock rock worse than any Rush ever… man, it took Canadian content laws to produce any Canadian music almost as bad…
Cacti
@Major Major Major Major:
Loathe bubble gum punk.
Ruckus
@Omnes Omnibus:
Hey Robert was/isn’t a bad guy. He just got caught doing what I think a lot of people were doing. Not a fan for sure, don’t mistake this for that. I’ve actually met him in another, completely different setting not long after he was exposed and he was nothing like I expected.
Angrifon
@DougJ: Interesting. First time I ever heard the song was on a Motown comp I bought when I was a teenager in the 80s, I thought. Must be a memory misfire.
Origuy
Lots of good Canadian in the folk and traditional genres. Loreena McKennitt, Natalie McMaster, Buffy Saint Marie, Joni Mitchell, Leonard Cohen.
Then there’s Acadian and Quebecois traditional. In the latter, I’m a fan of Geniticorum.
Fnarf
“Band Of Gold” was not on Motown. It was on Invictus, the label Holland-Dozier-Holland formed after they left Motown. Al Green wasn’t on Motown, either; he recorded for Hi, out of Memphis.
Cacti
@SatanicPanic:
Can’t argue with that.
smintheus
Best Motown: Ronettes, I can hear music
burnspbesq
You forgot two truly awful Canadian songs: “Snowbird” (Anne Murray) and “Insensitive” (Jann Arden).
Fave Motown tracks:
You’re All I Need to Get By
Come See About Me
My Girl
Tracks of My Tears
Ain’t Too Proud to Beg
Patricia Kayden
@raven: Never heard it before. The lead singer is pretty good because I loved his duet with Gwyneth Paltrow. (I was shocked to find out that Paltrow could sing so well).
Angrifon
@Cacti: Unpossible. Gene Simmons invented the devil horns handsign. He even applied for a trademark, so it must be true. QED, KISS is awesome.
dance around in your bones
Worst American song of that time (relatively – there’s lots of ‘worsts’) was ‘Annie had a baby, can’t work no more {would you believe it Annie had a baby?} etc ad nauseum.
I’m sure I’ll think of more. Purple Polka Dot Bikini etc. That Australian song about the hide on the wall. InaGaddaDaVida etc. Ack ??♂️??!!!
ETA: I probably got this thread’s gist wrong, too. What I get for speed reading sloppily.
Waldo
@Cacti: FYI: Abba is in the RnR Hall of Fame.
germy
They weren’t Motown, but I always liked The Cookies
I’m Into Something Good
from 1961-62
The Lodger
@Origuy: And Stan Rogers. Can’t leave him off the list.
zhena gogolia
There was that Canadian woman with the smoky voice and the short blonde hair, I hated her.
different-church-lady
@Origuy: Canada gets a pass in perpetuity for Joni alone.
burnspbesq
Even the best Canadian artists are prone to the occasional clunker. See, e.g. “Wondering Where the Lions Are.”
Major Major Major Major
@Waldo: ABBA holds up.
Comrade Colette Collaboratrice
@Le Comte de Monte Cristo, fka Edmund Dantes: “Wreck” is awful, but “Sundown” is even worse.
Worstest: Celine Dion, “It’s All Coming Back to Me Now” (although I have seen an awesome drag queen lip sync version that almost reconciled me to it).
Great Motown: Stevie Wonder, “As.”
germy
@Angrifon:
John Lennon is giving it on the 1967 Magical Mystery Tour album cover (or his cartoon avatar is, anyway)
Formerly disgruntled in Oregon
Okay, guess Geddy Lee’s voice must not be for everyone… (but I found that out the hard way back in the day)
smintheus
Do William Shatner’s recordings count as Canadian?
burnspbesq
@smintheus:
Ronettes were a Phil Spector project. Phillies records.
zhena gogolia
@zhena gogolia:
Anne Murray.
Iowa Old Lady
@HeleninEire: You shut up.
Shalimar
Freewill is the most annoying and pretentious Rush song (other than maybe The Trees), which is saying something, but I still think that is a long way from worst Canadian songs ever.
edit to add: The category you’re really proposing is “Extremely Popular Songs I Think Suck”, which is a different thing.
Patricia Kayden
@toine: @toine: Guns and Roses is too loud for me but those other bands you named are okay. I grew up with that kind of rock so perhaps I’m brainwashed. LOL.
Waldo
@Major Major Major Major:
Agreed. That shit’s timeless.
Byrookorbycrook
You can’t blame Canada for a lot of that bad music as there was a tremendous market in the US for said music. Rush may be Canadian, but they are fueled and funded by Americans. And Celine Dion does not have a residency in Montreal, but Sin City U.S.A.
Major Major Major Major
@Shalimar:
We just glossing over 2112 or something?
glocksman
@Le Comte de Monte Cristo, fka Edmund Dantes:
God help me, but that’s one of my all time favorites.?
Patricia Kayden
@germy: Gene Simmons needs to sue John Lennon then.
What a preposterous claim for Simmons to make. He must be desperate for money.
Patricia Kayden
@zhena gogolia: Now we’re just hating on random Canadians. Wowzers!
toine
@Patricia Kayden:
different strokes I guess… Any time I hear them I want to stab myself in the ear with a pencil… :-)
BillCinSD
Good Canadian bands
Thrush Hermit
Superfriendz
Sloan
The Grapes of Wrath
NCSteve
@Shalimar: Arguing about the what the most annoying and pretentious Rush song is is like aruging about who is the most objectively evil person in the Trump Administration. Bannon? Pruitt? Mulvaney? Sessions? Whatever differences exist, they are so far beyond the threshold of tolerability as to make no difference.
Booger
@Death Panel Truck: He has addressed this. It doesn’t refer to the year.
Butthurt Jordan Trombone (fka XTPD)
@smintheus: Close enough.
@Comrade Colette Collaboratrice: Or as it’s better known, “a bass sample for the Wu-Tang Clan’s ‘Method Man.'”
zhena gogolia
@Patricia Kayden:
I thought the topic was bad Canadian music. Anne Murray sang bad Canadian music.
Ridnik Chrome
The New Pornographers made me forgive Canada for Rush.
Louis
@dance around in your bones:
Rick James is Canadian and Motown! Someone not liking Hank Ballard and The Midnighters “Annie Had a Baby”. Why? Too many great Mowtown for just 5. What about the Canadian band (cannot remember but someone will) that was supposed to have put out the missing Beatles album. And what about that record by Monty Hall? And what about Ringo by Lorne Greene? And the split single by Count Floyd and Johnnie LaRue?
Shalimar
@Major Major Major Major: 2112 is … laughably bad science fiction but not horrible as music, albeit interminably long. In my defense, I haven’t listened to 2112 since the 1980s.
different-church-lady
@Major Major Major Major: I’m going to listen to that tonight, just to make you mofos cry.
Shalimar
@zhena gogolia: Anne Murray sang Canadian music for people who couldn’t afford an anesthesiologist for their surgery. I never listened long enough to know if it was bad.
ArchTeryx
@Doug!: Yakov Smirnoff is just a vile human being, period. His music (he had music?) had little to do with it.
And I really liked Freewill. It’s definitely something that resonates with my struggles in the political arena: “If you choose not to decide you still have made a choice.” And that choice put Trump in the WH.
zhena gogolia
@Patricia Kayden:
I love Canada.
Butthurt Jordan Trombone (fka XTPD)
@Louis: So we’re just going to fold Upstate NY into Canada now?
Though I can see what one would do so.
Shalimar
@NCSteve: Fair point. I like Rush, though I do find some of it annoying and almost all of it pretentious, so I get that many people don’t.
Major Major Major Major
@Shalimar: True! I was mostly gobsmacked that somebody would think there was a more pretentious Rush song.
@different-church-lady: I kind of like it, I have it on vinyl, actually. Good for a listen once in a blue moon, and kind of a fun cover.
HeleninEire
@Iowa Old Lady: LOL. It’s June 26th and 52 degrees and raining here in Dublin. Thinking about turning on the heat!!!!
Is it HOTTTTTTTT where you are?
I LOVE IT HERE. Come visit IOL.
Butthurt Jordan Trombone (fka XTPD)
@Major Major Major Major: Pussy Riot and Поющие Сердца (Singing Heart)?
Patricia Kayden
@toine: So I assume you don’t listen to Classic Rock stations because those bands are staples on them.
@dance around in your bones: You’re Having My Baby by Paul Anka wins hands down although I have to admit that it has a catchy tune.
Ian G.
@scottinnj:
Damn, that’s an impressive list of horrible songs, especially since it doesn’t include any Nickelback or Justin Bieber.
Ed_finnerty
@mai naem mobile: Alvin and the chipmunks singing jŕr Tolkien books
Butthurt Jordan Trombone (fka XTPD)
@Patricia Kayden: Worst American pop song or worst American song, period? ‘Cause if it’s the latter then this Scuba Chicken/Awol One album probably takes the top nineteen spots.
dance around in your bones
@Louis: ‘Annie Had a Baby’ ranks right down there with that ‘If I was a carpenter and you were a lady would you marry me anyway would you have my baby ‘ song….can’t remember the title TG. Lots of schlocky songs that I lived through and some I happily sang, knowing no better, alas.
germy
@ArchTeryx: Fun fact: For a few years, Smirnoff owned the house in L.A. that Lenny Bruce lived and died in. When Smirnoff’s career took a downturn, he had to sell it and move to Missouri.
germy
@dance around in your bones: “Annie had a baby” was a sequel song, if I recall correctly. I think the original song was “Work With Me Annie.”
Patricia Kayden
@zhena gogolia: I was just joking. But I demand a thread covering great Canadian (and foreign) bands to make up for this insult to Canadians.
ArchTeryx
@Major Major Major Major: I’d have to agree there. 2112 is actually dedicated to Ayn Rand, but the weird thing is that it has much more of a 1984 vibe to it then a Randian one.
Fortunately, Rush – particularly Neal Peart – got over their Objectivist phase. Untimely deaths in the family will tend to knock the selfish right out of you, and it certainly did him. Snakes and Arrows, little known outside of the hard core fans like myself, is a giant swing at the Religious Wrong.
Keep holding on so long
‘Cause there’s a chance
That we might not be so wrong
We could be down and gone
But we hold on…
Patricia Kayden
@Butthurt Jordan Trombone (fka XTPD): No dear. That distinction goes to Muskrat Love. Can’t believe that it was actually a hit which adults listened to. Yikes!
dance around in your bones
@germy: I believe I have blotted that fact out of my limited for those kind of songs memory, thank FSM. But thanks germy ???♂️
Betsy
@Major Major Major Major: Because that is my age group?
Major Major Major Major
@Betsy: Sure, but what about all the folks under 50? Just sayin’.
different-church-lady
@Patricia Kayden: Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
NorthLeft12
@Just One More Canuck: Yep, more American exceptionalism. I am sure Doug! and his cohorts will figure out some way to blame Canada for the crappy songs made by US producers of musical product.
Can’t believe the Guess Who was named in this thread…come on man, they were great and a lot of fun to listen to.
different-church-lady
I’m just going to go with a blanket respone to this whole thread: “Phuck u, haters.”
Gravenstone
@Patricia Kayden: Most of the knee jerk Rush hate seems to stem from their early curiosity with objectivism. As a result, lots of holier than though sorts turned their backs and utterly ignored the evolution of the band through their 40+ year history.
germy
@dance around in your bones:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_36aURHMpYU
john fremont
@JoJo: Kids Wanna Rock by Bryan Adams. Every cliché of eighties rock in one song. Heck every cliché of nineties rock rolled into one band , Nickelback, I’m sensing a pattern here.
Gravenstone
@Shalimar: It’s also 41 fucking years old! At the time it was basically a fuck you to their label for lack of support and their efforts to aggressively commercialize the band. Everyone was basically shocked when it took off on the back of very aggressive touring. Hate it now if you must, but it had a hell of a lot of impact in its day.
toine
@Patricia Kayden:
I actually do… there is a lot of classic rock I love… there is also an awful lot that makes me switch to Radio 2 as fast as I can…
dance around in your bones
@germy: OMFG. Uncanny Valley Cat. Thanks? ?
Bonnie
Worst song by a Canadian – Anything sung by William Shatner
Best Motown:
Anything sung by Aretha Franklin
I Can’t Help Myself, It’s the Same Old Song, and Walk Away Renee by The Four Tops
Papa Is A Rolling Stone and Can’t Get Next to You by The Temptations
Someday We’ll Be Together and Reflections by Diana Ross and The Supremes
My Favorite Canadians: Gordon Lightfoot, Anne Murray, and Leonard Cohen
Butthurt Jordan Trombone (fka XTPD)
@Bonnie: Shatner is (generally) so bad it’s good, though, which keeps his music from being THE WORST.
OldDave
When we get around to “Best Canadian Musicians” I’ll be going out on a limb and mention Margo Timmins along with the more obvious ones.
Motown? Love is like a Heat Wave, by Martha and the Vandellas. Actually, pretty much anything the Funk Brothers played on.
Doug!
@Fnarf:
I assumed it was Motwn since it H-D-H.
Juju
@Omnes Omnibus: But how can you dislike a song where you don’t even know what the hell he’s singing except for the word informer?
Bill
If anyone wants to check out some Canadian music that sucks not at all, pull up a band called Big Wreck on the youtube. Song called I Digress should get you started nicely. Really meaty, heavy yet tuneful verses, and a chorus that will have you doing a double-take.
Smedley Darlington Prunebanks (formerly Mumphrey, et al.)
My Heart Will Go On is the worst Canadian song of all time.
Tim from MI
Best Motown (also from a born and raised Detroiter)
Shake Me, Wake Me (When It’s Over) – Four Tops
Signed, Sealed, and Delivered – Stevie
Tears of a Clown – Smoky and the Miracles
Keep Me Hangin’ On – Supremes
Dancing in the Streets – Martha and the Vandellas
Worst Canadian Song –
I can’t believe nobody mentioned Seasons in the Sun by Terry Jacks! Legendarily bad!
Tim from MI
@Ridnik Chrome: The New Pornographers are one of the best bands from anywhere in the last 20 years.
Omnes Omnibus
@Juju: Here is a cheat sheet. And from In Living Color.
Butthurt Jordan Trombone (fka XTPD)
@Omnes Omnibus: @Omnes Omnibus: Interestingly enough, he seems to have been actually “bout dat life” (as opposed to Scuba Chicken upthread & Vanilla Ice).
rm
@Faction: Even worse, it should be “you and me.”
Steve in the ATL
@Tim from MI:
You nailed it!
Omnes Omnibus
@Steve in the ATL: Merely a bad translation of this.
worn
Doug –
As for Motown, I can’t sing the praises of David Ruffin’s ‘lost’ 1970 album. So much good stuff on that one. Though it may be considered sacrilegious, I think I actually am more partial to his take on the perfect pop song “I Want You Back” than Michael’s, if only for the worldliness of an adult voice carrying the tune. A Rainy Night in Georgia & Dinah are also outstanding, the latter especially if you one is partial to great bass playing (as I am). Motown records are just full of it.
Which leads us to, ahem, Rush. [full disclosure: prog rock fan, guilty as charged] But Freewill? Over ‘Big Money’ ? Good Lord, when that sharker-jumper came out I was a senior in HS, a fan of the band’s, and was accordingly gobsmacked…from that 1st cheese fart synth lick I was just like ‘what the fuuuuuck is this?’ No link, because, why?
smintheus
@Steve in the ATL: The B-side to Terry Jacks’ “Seasons in the Sun” (“Put the Bone In”) is even worse. Much worse.
James Powell
Can’t possibly list five best or five favorite Motown songs. I could probably do 25 favorite. I have a playlist that has 60 songs on it and I had to leave some good ones off.
You know what’s always a great Motown song? The one you forgot about.
Omnes Omnibus
@James Powell:
Oh yeah, that one.
Omnes Omnibus
@worn: David Ruffin could flat out sing.
Shalimar
@Gravenstone: I know the band history, though I think Rush and Fly By Night are much better albums and it is disappointing that they weren’t more popular. As far as ultra-long songs that were still excellent, I prefer Hemispheres and particularly La Villa Strangiato.
Amanda Toth
One Week by the BareNaked Ladies is awful. Also, anything by Justin Bieber, especially “Baby”.
Amanda Toth
@Bonnie — I recommend “Struggle” by William Shatner. Perfect example of so awful, it’s amazing.
Jamey
Worst Canadian song?
Corey-Fucking-Hart, “Sunglasses at Night.”
Bruce Cockburn, “If I Had a Rocket-Launcher.”
99% of the Rush catalogue
tones
@daverave: French pronunciation of bubble I guessed… it is bubble music, elevator music with no substance and the worst lyrics you ever imagined possible.
That guy is the worst and you just know they plan to make him the next Sinatra or whoever could not sing but became famous singers.
Louis Diamond
@dance around in your bones:I hope this allowed here, is this cause I have to put that idea to rest. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=avMtcrmIweo