Oh, #Florida! Man puts conference call on hold to chase bear out of home. https://t.co/kILpnImN12 via @SarahElsesser
— Craig Pittman (@craigtimes) November 6, 2017
The Palm Beach Post has the details!
A Florida man found a strange visitor inside his garage Monday afternoon.
Brad Tamm, of Seminole County, was working from his home office and had to put his conference call on hold because a large bear made its way into his garage, according to WKMG.
The hungry bear had opened the fridge, even though there were trash cans lining the street, WKMG reported.
“So he was in there and then he stood up on his hind legs and his head, I swear, his head, he was taller than me when I was inside of the office,” Tamm told WKMG.
Tamm thought that the bear would take off running when he made some noise, but that wasn’t the case.
“Surprising. I really thought just a little bit of noise or just seeing me stand up, I think he would take off. But they are so conditioned to be around people and humans,” Tamm explained to WKMG.
Eventually the animal slowly made his way out, but not before Tamm got a video as proof.
Stay frosty and remember these rules regarding human-ursine interactions!
jl
” The hungry bear had opened the fridge, even though there were trash cans lining the street ”
Liberal snoots can make fun of FloridaMan and ForidaWoman. But don’t disrespect FloridaBear. They are refined, cultured, and insist on the finer things in life.
Mike J
@jl: Wall st is right, we’ve been overbuilding trash cans.
JCJ
@jl:
I imagine the bear was looking for some good beer, perhaps Chimay or Affligem, or maybe even a local microbrew. Instead all he found was Bud Light.
Major Major Major Major
Little noisy bells! I love it.
NotMax
Just a heads-up, Ghostery browser add-on flags and blocks the Kaltura player used for the video.
Major Major Major Major
@NotMax: Yeah mine is not happy.
Another Scott
The sign reminds me of a joke my dad told me once.
“How do you tell the difference between a Black Bear and a Grizzly Bear?”
Dunno.
“Well, a Black Bear is smaller and will follow you up the tree that you climb to try to escape. A Grizzly Bear is larger and can’t climb the tree, but instead will just knock it over.”
;-)
Cheers,
Scott.
(Who, last week, saw a black bear for a few minutes right next to Skyline Drive in Shenandoah National Park.)
Adam L Silverman
@jl: Yes, yes we do.
Mary G
I would like to propose that if someone has put a gif with popcorn being eaten on a Twitter thread once, no more popcorn gifs on that thread, no matter what.
NotMax
@JCJ
What, no Hamm’s?
Mnemosyne
@jl:
A local bear gained the nickname of “Meatball” because he was breaking into people’s garages and eating frozen meatballs out of people’s freezers. He was eventually relocated to a wildlife refuge near San Diego because he just kept showing up in people’s backyards and garages and freaking them out.
Yarrow
One of my relatives came downstairs to find a bear in the kitchen. Apparently someone had left the sliding door to the deck unlocked. Oops!
Adam L Silverman
@Yarrow: Oops is right.
Fair Economist
@jl:
Well of course! Where do you get YOUR food?
Mike in DC
Carter Page’s transcript checks off a few more boxes of the Steele dossier. As i said before, he’s a central figure in many of the dossier’s allegations. At this rate I’d expect pretty much every one of the 9 Trump circle members who met with the Russians to face legal troubles.
Suzanne
@Mnemosyne: That’s adorable. I want a Meatball.
I hope he has all the Italian meats his heart could ever hope for at the refuge.
Yarrow
@Suzanne: How’s spawn? How are you? Hope things are somewhat better.
jl
@Mike in DC: Carter Page must be feigning some kind of mental problem in order to get himself some leniency, or, he has already plead and Mueller has him cooperating on a truly novel investigative strategy. Or, he is bonkers.
Adam L Silverman
@Suzanne: How are things going?
Adam L Silverman
@jl: Bonkers.
Suzanne
@Yarrow: I checked Spawn in to the behavioral health facility around lunchtime today. She seemed ungood within expected ranges.
I am terrible.
Omnes Omnibus
@jl: Someone has to, and the humans won’t.
Omnes Omnibus
@Suzanne: Buck up, kiddo.
Mary G
@Suzanne: {{{Hugs}}}
Suzanne
@Omnes Omnibus: Everything is terrible.
Adam L Silverman
@Suzanne: You’ve done right by her. This is hard, but you’ll both get through to the other side of it. And doing what you’ve done is a big part of getting you both there.
Yarrow
@Suzanne: I’m so sorry. What a difficult time for you, spawn and your whole family. Please take as good care of yourself as you can. At least she’s where she can get help and that allows you to take a breath before the next steps.
Barbara
@Suzanne: I hope things turn around soon.
JCJ
@NotMax:
Good point, but I don’t necessarily think of Florida as the land of sky blue waters.
When I was a kid I loved commercials with the Hamm’s Beer Bear
some guy
what, no Swamp Head or First Magnitude? out, dude!
best Florida Man post. bravo Adam
Major Major Major Major
@Suzanne: Expected ranges is good, though. This stuff is a tough nut to crack and you’re doing the best you can.
rikyrah
There are bears in Florida?
Fair Economist
@Suzanne: I’m sorry you have to go through this. It’s so hard when things aren’t right with your children. I think you’re parenting as well as anyone could.
some guy
@Suzanne:
it can, and should, get better.
not thinking, not praying, just saying.
JCJ
@Suzanne:
Be strong, Suzanne. My wife has been hospitalized three times with acute psychosis. It is not easy dealing with these problems. I am sure all of us jackals will offer you all of the support and encouragement we can via the intertubes.
some guy
@rikyrah:
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Florida_black_bear
Omnes Omnibus
@Suzanne: I wish I could say something that helps. It’s not my thing. I am better at charm or vitriol. But you and spawn have all the good thoughts I can offer.
RepubAnon
I’m reminded of a Firesign Theater sketch for Bear Wizz Beer: “ Son, it’s in the water – that’s why it’s yellow…”
some guy
The FWC says the study, led by Joseph D. Clark of the U.S. Geological Survey and the University of Tennessee, shows the bear population is 48 percent larger than when previous estimates were done in the early 2000s and is an indication of how conservation measures have helped the black bear population grow since the 1970s, when there were only 300 to 500 bears in the state.
Suzanne
Thanks, y’all. The good wishes mean a lot.
Like most people of weak intellect and character, I tend to look for good omens or positive signs when everything is shitty. As I was driving from the ED to the behavioral hospital following the ambulance, “Adam’s Song” by Blink-182 came on the radio. I changed that shit.
Later, I heard “Shiny Happy People”. I feel like I’m being taunted.
Omnes Omnibus
@Suzanne: Does this help? Cohen.
Yarrow
Someone here posted a tweet from Amy Mek yesterday. Can’t remember the context – maybe someone liked to the administration liked or RT’d it? In any case, thought this was interesting.
The account has existed since 2012. So…more penetration at all levels?
some guy
@Suzanne:
B52s irony can be fun, or it can be totally inappropriate. or both.
hang tough, or we will unleash the Florida Black Bears.
Adam L Silverman
@rikyrah: Yep, Florida has a sub species variant of black bear. Didn’t you ever see Gentle Ben?
They are still endangered, but have been making a comeback. Just like the Florida panther. At one point their range had dwindled way, way down. Now you get sightings in a lot of places they’d not been seen in decades. I know they’ve found bear sign, as well as gotten footage on trail cams in both the Green Swamp and just north of New Port Richey.
Omnes Omnibus
@some guy: You seem nice.
Adam L Silverman
@Suzanne:
Smart move, I can’t carry a tune to save my life!//
More seriously, keeping good thoughts for you and spawn. Hang in there and let us know if we can do anything.
Yarrow
@Suzanne: I feel you, with the songs taunting you. It sucks. Maybe listen to a collection of songs you know – something you know and can control yourself so those dumbass songs don’t show up unexpectedly. Sometimes just a small change like that can help.
NotMax
@Suzanne
With best wishes, for the both of you.
some guy
@Yarrow:
I think we need to make bots and trolls and automagic astroturf campaigns key to the idea of “collusion.” the press seems to understand how that was used in the 2016 election, but it doesn’t seem to have penetrated the public consciousness that Twitter(and FB and Gazoogle, et alia) is a tool thta enabled Trumpism.
not just Maggie Haberman and the useful idiots at the Times, but the CEOs of the tech companies, made “but her emails” and ‘lock her up” legitimate political difference. oy!!!!
Adam L Silverman
@Yarrow: Yep, she’s either a bot or run by someone else who runs a number of accounts.
Origuy
You can distinguish the scat from a brown bear from that of a grizzly bear. Scat from a grizzy smells like pepper and has little bells in it.
some guy
@Omnes Omnibus:
you kiss your mom with those lips?
Steve in the ATL
@Mike J:
Nice callback. Well played.
Faithful Lurker
My family is in Tallahassee and I visit about once a year. One visit, it must have been 4 or 5 years ago, the state allowed a bear hunting season in the panhandle, as I remember it, something like a 100 bears were killed in a 24 hour period and the season was abruptly halted. Everyone, except the bears, were having too much fun. Florida indeed.
GregB
I hope things get better Suzanne. Warm thoughts for you and your family.
Adam L Silverman
@some guy: It is part of the CI investigation that Mueller inherited. This thing is basically going to be the largest US counterintel op since VENONA, which took about 40 years, start to finish, to unwind. This is going to take a while, despite what seems to be things speeding up right now.
Omnes Omnibus
@some guy: You blow goats with yours?
Adam L Silverman
@Faithful Lurker: They only allowed 100 kills. It was a limited cull in a very specific area and had a maximum length season of 14 days. It was very controversial, even among hunters.
guachi
Bear should have mauled him to death for that vertical video. GRRRRRRR!!!!!
Adam L Silverman
@Yarrow: I’m pretty sure purposeful wife is another one of these bogus accounts. Not a bot, but being run by someone who is running a lot of similar accounts.
Steve in the ATL
@Suzanne:
If it makes you feel better, in the video for that song one of the dancers is a guy wearing a Mao hat. His brother was a law school classmate and friend.
Ok, that didn’t help at all. Send me away with Omnes.
some guy
@Omnes Omnibus:
when you finish pleasuring him does your dog cum in your mouth, or do you do the polite thing and spit it out and bill the dry cleaning to your clients?
some guy
@guachi:
only took 59 comments. bravo!
some guy
@Adam L Silverman:
remind me again which low paid staffer in the seemingly defunct DNC communications department will be making this a “meme” as the kids today call it?
seriously, wtf? why can’t we do anything with this as it unfolds?
Omnes Omnibus
@some guy: I let that happen to others. I haven’t had a dog since the fall of 1985. Thanks for reminding me of my loss. You asshole.
Adam L Silverman
@some guy: Don’t ask me, I’m just a nat-sec consultant.
rikyrah
@Suzanne:
I am so sorry that your family is going through this. ?
Sending both of you positive thoughts and prayers.
some guy
@Omnes Omnibus:
wow, 33 years since you billed a client for dry cleaning dog jizm from your suit. how horrible.
Yarrow
@Adam L Silverman: Yeah, there seem to be a lot of them. I think it’s the account being there since 2012 that kind of surprised me. Russian bots and trolls just waiting to be activated.
Adam L Silverman
@some guy: Dial it back a notch. Maybe two!
Faithful Lurker
@Adam L Silverman: It only took a day to kill 100 bears. How many bears can there be in a limited area? Being a Florida native, I suspect an influential real estate developer was trying to sanitize an area to build a development. Of course, that only left the panhandle crackers around….I’d rather live with bears.
some guy
@Adam L Silverman:
my apologies, Adam. White Working Class voters like omnes omnibus tend to get my hackles raised.
I take back what I said he did with his dog and his client in 1985.
Omnes Omnibus
@some guy: Why are you fighting with me?
Adam L Silverman
@Faithful Lurker: It hasn’t been repeated. They didn’t do one in 2016, they didn’t do one this year, and they’re not doing one next year.
Here’s the Florida Fish and Wildlife Commission Report:
http://myfwc.com/media/3358561/2015-Florida-Black-Bear-Hunt-Report.pdf
One thing to note on the map, they’ve had sightings in north Pinellas County in the past couple of years.
And here’s some news reporting:
http://www.orlandosentinel.com/news/os-fwc-votes-no-florida-bear-hunt-2017-story.html
https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/speaking-of-science/wp/2015/10/29/298-bears-killed-in-florida-hunt-that-ignored-science/
https://news.nationalgeographic.com/2015/10/151023-black-bear-hunt-florida-animals-conservation/
Yarrow
Man that Carter Page is really dumb.
Text in image reads:
“I’ll send you guys a readout soon regarding some incredible insights and outreach I received from a few Russian legislators and senior members of the Presidential administration here,” according to an email quoted by Schiff.
some guy
@Faithful Lurker:
In June 2015, the FWC approved a limited bear hunt to take place beginning Oct. 24, 2015, in four of the seven BMUs. The purpose of reinstating a bear hunting season was to slow the growth of large and growing bear populations. Regulated hunting is a proven, effective and biologically sustainable method for maintaining proper balance of bear populations relative to available habitat. In June 2016, FWC’s Commission voted to postpone bear hunting in Florida in 2016. At the April 2017 Commission Meeting, staff was directed to bring back a revised bear management plan in two years, including hunting as a management tool.
http://myfwc.com/hunting/by-species/bear/
Adam L Silverman
@some guy: Don’t apologize to me. I’m not quite sure what you all are fighting about despite reading all the comments. I’m just asking you to ease up a bit in your phrasing.
Omnes Omnibus
@some guy: You are a fuckwit, You have an idea what my views are. Do you have any idea of the difference between what I want and what I can get is.
mike in dc
@Yarrow:
Yeah, it seems like the pace has picked up a bit since the Manafort indictment. It wouldn’t surprise me to see another wave(or two) of indictments before the end of the year. It looks like the idea of direct coordination with Russia is not only becoming a bit more established, the general public is beginning to accept it as well.
some guy
funny story. it was a FWC Officer who caught the guy living in the in-law apt. in the barn of our rental when he collected psylocibin shrooms from the cow ffields south of us about a year after we moved in. we laughed and giggled, but it cost him $1000 to get out from under it. exact ame FWC “Officer” caught my wife ranting at a moviegoer texting seated next to us in a movie theatre 2 months later. as he was pulling Omnes outof our row some gal bumped him (the FWC Officer) , he dropped wwc voter and charged my wife with interfering with an officer. cost us 2 grand to hire a lawyer and make the charge go away, as she was coming up for tenure.
forget it Jake, it’s Florida
Major Major Major Major
New guy seems fun.
some guy
@Omnes Omnibus:
how much did that dry cleaner bill you?
Steve in the ATL
@Major Major Major Major: he certainly enjoys pie!
Major Major Major Major
@Steve in the ATL: Let’s be honest, who the hell don’t?
mike in dc
If you want Adam to ban you it seems more efficient to just ask him directly.
Mary G
@Yarrow: Dumb and crazy. He only feels safe in Russia because Hillary is threatening his life! Or something.
Adam L Silverman
@Yarrow: I’ve read about 50 pages so far, it’s like some sort of stream of consciousness performance art. I’m amazed they didn’t have him drug tested on site and in real time just to make sure he wasn’t blottoed out of his gourd on something.
?BillinGlendaleCA
@Adam L Silverman: I’m still waiting for Mr. Spock with the goatee to show up and transport us back to our own universe.
Czanne
Open Threadiness: We have kitties!! After 2.5 years without, we brought home (temp names) Julia the Elder aka Heidi (1 year old, about 5 pounds) and Julia the Younger (about 6 months old, about 4 pounds) aka Lovey. They’re both mostly white; Elder has some seal pointing and blue eyes and is aloof/traumatized but curious as all hell. Younger has some small calico patches, golden eyes and is all about knowing what the people are doing. I’m going to have to revamp our wardrobes — we’ve been wearing a lot of black; it’s time to make that a lot of grey.
@Newdealfarmgirl — if the Minnesota kittens still need homes, I can take one, and we’ll figure out how to get that kitten to Denver. I disagree with Edward Gorey on the right number of cats in a house: I think two is the minimum, three is just right, and four are too many. (Gorey said six was perfect, five not quite and seven too many.)
opiejeanne
@Adam L Silverman: I’d lay odds that Purposeful wife is a guy, if not a bot or a sock puppet. account
Kathleen
@Suzanne: {{{{{Suzanne}}}}}
SWMBO
@Suzanne: it only seems like the universe is conspiring to taunt you. We’ve been through hospitalization of our son many times. It’s expensive, exhausting and grinds on you in every possible way. Don’t try to second guess your feelings. Validate them because they’re real. Even if you’re the only one that feels that way, it’s still real. My touchstone for doctors goes back to one of the first doctors my kids had. I was overwhelmed and crying in his office and he asked me what he could do to help ME. He told me that no matter what he diagnosed or prescribed, if I couldn’t manage it, the kids would never get better. He knew I had to be able to do it or get help for me. Every doctor after that that was any good at all asked what I needed to get through this.
What do you need from us to help you help Spawn? If you need private contact, you can get my email from any front pager. I’ll do whatever I can to help. Even if it’s just listen while you vent.
Uncle Cosmo
@JCJ: Wow, that brings back memories. For a brief time when I was a kid Hamm’s was a sponsor of the Orioles’ local broadcasts – when the Land of Sky-Blue Waters met the Land of Pleasant Living.
SFAW
@Suzanne:
I’m hoping things will work out in the best possible way. Having been in a sort-of-similar situation, I know it’s really painful, with a lot of second-guessing. You love Spawn, and are doing what you think is best, even if it doesn’t always feel like it.