Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

Everybody saw this coming.

I did not have telepathic declassification on my 2022 bingo card.

Usually wrong but never in doubt

The cruelty is the point; the law be damned.

Not all heroes wear capes.

A last alliance of elves and men. also pet photos.

An almost top 10,000 blog!

And we’re all out of bubblegum.

I did not have this on my fuck 2022 bingo card.

This really is a full service blog.

Optimism opens the door to great things.

Tick tock motherfuckers!

Being the leader of the world means to be the leader of peace.

I like you, you’re my kind of trouble.

“Everybody’s entitled to be an idiot.”

Insiders who complain to politico: please report to the white house office of shut the fuck up.

“Jesus paying for the sins of everyone is an insult to those who paid for their own sins.”

Damn right I heard that as a threat.

We still have time to mess this up!

Let there be snark.

Bark louder, little dog.

Wow, I can’t imagine what it was like to comment in morse code.

Peak wingnut was a lie.

Americans barely caring about Afghanistan is so last month.

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Reader Interactions

82Comments

  1. 1.

    Smedley Darlington Prunebanks (formerly Mumphrey, et Al.)

    Where’s my God damned calendar, damn it? It’s late, the formatting sucks and you used the wrong print shop.

  2. 2.

    JPL

    The Obama’s portraits are being unveiled at the Smithsonian. I’m watching on CSPAN online. Start from the beginning so you don’t miss Michelle’s speech, and have a hanky on hand just because.

  10. 10.

    JPL

    @dr. bloor: Not sure what you mean about white twitter, but personally I still have a hanky in hand. Gotta admit that it is pretty awesome that he talked about Michelle’s hotness genes.
    I miss them so much.

  12. 12.

    Another Scott

    I see Obama’s picture in Cole’s Twitter feed. Look at the size of his hands!!

    rofl.

    Cheers,
    Scott.

  14. 14.

    guachi

    Are there any calendars left? I thought my wife was paying for one and she thought I was paying for one and the result was no one paid for one.

  16. 16.

    smintheus

    Here’s a Michigan woman who got hers, but good. She was ripped off by a crooked payday lender, which CFPB was going to sue into oblivion until Mick ‘Payday’ Mulvaney forced the bureau to drop the case.

    “To be honest I’m really mad, really pissed, because I actually voted for Trump,” Bonenfant says. “So knowing that his guy threw out this case that affects people like me, I feel kind of like stupid — just kind of like betrayed.”

    The rest of us who had the sense to vote against the con man feel kind of like betrayed by you; stupid doesn’t begin to cover your issues, Bonenfant.

  18. 18.

    dr. bloor

    @Lyrebird: If FLOTUS chose Sherald for a painting that “looks like” her, she chose poorly and should have known better. However, if she chose Sherald to capture who she is, she chose very well. It oozes strength, determination and beauty.

  19. 19.

    The Thin Black Duke

    @smintheus:

    “To be honest I’m really mad, really pissed, because I actually voted for Trump,” Bonenfant says. “So knowing that his guy threw out this case that affects people like me, I feel kind of like stupid — just kind of like betrayed.”

    Translation: “Wait! Why is the leopard eating my f–ARGH!”

  20. 20.

    Another Scott

    @dr. bloor: Since cameras and printers are so good about capturing and rendering “realistic” images these days, I like it when painted portraits don’t try to emulate photographs. Paintings should get you to “see” the person a different and more thoughtful and emotional way. I think Sherald’s portrait does that very well indeed.

    Baltimore Sun:

    What will the pundits be talking about? Sherald paints life-sized portraits of African-Americans, but she paints them all with gray skin. She has said it’s “A way for me to subversively comment about race without feeling as though I’m excluding the viewer.” If Michelle Obama’s portrait also has gray skin, art critics are likely to focus on that aspect of the painting.

    Michelle knew what she was getting. Well done.

    Cheers,
    Scott.

  21. 21.

    John Cole

    @SiubhanDuinne: Nope- apparently they got all the test results and it is not urgent, and I have an appt. on Friday to see my general practitioner and from there we will scheduling appointments with specialists. For now I am just changing my diet to match the info they gave me.

  23. 23.

    stinger

    After I see the mail carrier’s car go by, I’ll trudge down my snow-filled lane to the mailbox. Will report back later.

  24. 24.

    Humdog

    @John Cole: Irt took me forever to get in for my upper gist please do not panic if you cannot get further tests as soon as you’d like. I have found changing my diet to be easier after a health scare than when I simply tried to lose weight. Scares focus the mind. Good luck!

  25. 25.

    Wolvesvalley

    My calendar just came! It’s beautiful! Very nice design, paper, and print quality.

    Haven’t had a chance to drool over every photo yet, but I am in love with Schrödie’s emerald eyes (August). Daisy the tuxedo cat (January 2019) looks very like my Chloe.

    If I can figure out how to photograph two black cats without having them look like shadowy blobs, I will submit some pix for next year’s calendar.

  30. 30.

    Alain the site fixer

    @JPL: I have removed some blocks on certain words, just testing. You’d be surprised how many people use ambient, casino, poker, or specialist and so get their messages blocked!

  32. 32.

    Gin & Tonic

    @Cheryl Rofer: These two sentences from that article are really good:

    The Obamas’ potential to change the tone and political culture of this country was blunted by the persistence of that racism before and during their time at the country’s political apex. Now that they have left office, now that their fundamental decency is in high relief by contrast with the new political order, memory is refreshed.

  40. 40.

    JPL

    @Gin & Tonic: This also

    They look a bit older than the two people who carried so much collective fantasy of a different America with them to Washington nine years ago. That fantasy was premature and unrealistic, and it is only now clear how powerfully it animated the meanest impulses of those who reject it. But these portraits will remind future generations how much wish fulfillment was embodied in the Obamas, and how gracefully they bore that burden.

  42. 42.

    Amir Khalid

    This is a test:
    Meet the poker specialist at the Ambient Casino, Emma Watson, and her calico pussycat.
    ETA: No joy.

  43. 43.

    Amir Khalid

    First test did not succeed. Test two:
    Meet the poker specialist at the Ambient Casino, Emma Watson, and her calico pussycat.
    ETA: I see the cat word is still banned, and still needs the workaround.

  44. 44.

    geg6

    Won’t know until I get home.

    I have a dog story that reminds me of one of yours, Cole. Came home after dark last night and as I was getting out of my car, I could see lights on the main street in front of my house. I thought it was a stray cat. But the animal took off right for me and, basically, leapt into my arms. It was the cutest, sweetest pup ever. No collar but obviously used to people and just wanted one to cuddle, I guess. I thought she’d been dumped at the Humane Society, which is just across the street from our house. So I got John to lock Koda and Lovey into the sun room and brought her in. Called the cops and they asked for my info and a description of the dog. I gave it to him and he said to hold. He came back on and said we’re sending an officer right away, which I thought was weird. Usually the cops call animal control for situations like this during off hours. So we waited for the cop, petting and talking to our new friend. I think she’s a min pin and just the sweetest thing. She was all wet and shivering, but happy to be around us. So the cop shows up and says he came because the dog had been picked up in another local town and when the cops who had her got her to the shelter, she got away. It happened about a half hour before I got home. She was a little getaway artist who just wanted to be in a house with people, I think. So we told the cop that we already had two dogs and didn’t really need another. However, if the owners don’t claim her and no one adopts her, we want the Humane Society to call us before they euthanize her and we’ll adopt.

    I’m a sucker, but how can you turn away a dog that leaps into your arms?

  47. 47.

    Yutsano

    @geg6: Not to mention mini pins are great puppers. Hopefully she does get picked up quickly although it almost sounds like you’re trying to convince yourself…

  50. 50.

    SiubhanDuinne

    @John Cole:

    Well, I know I’m not alone in hoping it is something easily controlled, and something that doesn’t require huge sacrifices on your part. All best wishes.

  53. 53.

    Alain the site fixer

    Test for editing.
    Ok it’s not great but it does work.
    It yeah it takes over screen and doesn’t return you to comment. I’ll look into this.

  55. 55.

    Aleta

    Back to Ms. Sherald and FL Michelle Obama:

    Ms. Sherald paints only African-Americans. Her subjects “exist in a place of the past, the present and the future,” she said. “It’s like something I sense with my spirit more than my mind.”

  56. 56.

    Steeplejack (phone)

    @SiubhanDuinne:

    Some words were inadvertently banned because they were part of the nyms of various trolls that got banned. I was doing some research over the weekend and saw an old thread where the word relax caused comments to be moderated!

  57. 57.

    Lyrebird

    @dr. bloor: @JPL:

    Fair enough. I am not modern enough.

    If the True FLOTUS herself is pleased, that is more than enough, and both paintings oughta liven up that portrait gallery!

  59. 59.

    R. Bailey

    Mine arrived in today’s mail delivery, so now we know how long it takes to go from WV to TX via USPS. Thanks so much for doing all that work! I look forward to perusing the photos at length later on.

  65. 65.

    geg6

    Well, crap. If people in Missouri and Texas have gotten theirs, mine better be in my mailbox when I get home!

  69. 69.

    glaukopis

    Yay, got mine in Ohio today. All the pets look great and Gibby and Mac are enjoying their glamour shot. Thanks!

  76. 76.

    CapnMubbers

    Yes! two in NoCal. One to keep, and one to entice another pet lover and potential jackal to the snark side. Thank you.

  78. 78.

    JAFD

    Greetings from New Jersey, where one petful calendar arrived today.
    Wanted to get really creative with last sentence, after checking two thesaurii, found ‘calendar’ has no exact synonym in English. More difficult than describing surrounding light or enviromental temperature without embedding ‘trade name’ for sleeping pill.
    Pleasant dreams, everyone, and a happy Valentine’s Day to all the young ladies* of Balloon Juice!

    *As I’m 67, From My Point Of View, all of you female persons qualify as ‘young ladies’ (chronologically, at least ;-) )

  80. 80.

    SWMBO

    @geg6: You are my kind of folks. Says the woman who adopted two more dogs that the neighbors couldn’t keep. The new ones are siblings of our three boys. Now we have 5 out of 10 siblings from two different litters. But they fit right in and it would leave a hole in our hearts and pack so we’re now up to seven dogs and stopping. Seriously.

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