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Balloon Juice

Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

I’d like to think you all would remain faithful to me if i ever tried to have some of you killed.

The rest of the comments were smacking Boebert like she was a piñata.

The republican ‘Pastor’ of the House is an odious authoritarian little creep.

It’s always darkest before the other shoe drops.

People are complicated. Love is not.

… gradually, and then suddenly.

Nothing says ‘pro-life’ like letting children go hungry.

In after Baud. Damn.

When you’re in more danger from the IDF than from Russian shelling, that’s really bad.

If you can’t control your emotions, someone else will.

Some judge needs to shut this circus down soon.

Giving in to doom is how authoritarians win.

Stop using mental illness to avoid talking about armed white supremacy.

So many bastards, so little time.

This year has been the longest three days of putin’s life.

rich, arrogant assholes who equate luck with genius

I see no possible difficulties whatsoever with this fool-proof plan.

Wake up. Grow up. Get in the fight.

One of our two political parties is a cult whose leader admires Vladimir Putin.

Radicalized white males who support Trump are pitching a tent in the abyss.

You are so fucked. Still, I wish you the best of luck.

We can show the world that autocracy can be defeated.

We cannot abandon the truth and remain a free nation.

We will not go quietly into the night; we will not vanish without a fight.

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You are here: Home / Politics / Domestic Politics / White Squirrel Update (Open Thread)

White Squirrel Update (Open Thread)

by Betty Cracker|  February 24, 201812:56 pm| 120 Comments

This post is in: Domestic Politics, Nature, Open Threads

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A while back in comments, I mentioned that one of the white squirrels* in my neighborhood had lost all its fur from the waist up (if squirrels can be said to have a waist…). Here ‘twas:

One of the white squirrels lost its fur from the waist up. Looks like a naked mole rat wearing MC Hammer pants, poor thing! pic.twitter.com/gWb2iTZ0Ac

— Betty Cracker (@bettycrackerfl) February 9, 2018

I Googled “squirrel fur loss” (God help me), and learned there can be many causes, some serious, some not. (And also that there are a lot of sick tickets on the internet, but I knew that.) I am pleased to report the squirrel’s fur is coming back. Here ‘tis:

So, I won’t have to devise ways to ambush it with sunblock this summer after all. That’s a relief.

Open thread!

*This squirrel alopecia episode taught me that there are at least two white squirrels in the neighborhood, as I continued to see one with fur during the above squirrel’s period of affliction. There may be hundreds, for all I know, but I’ve never seen more than one at a time.

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Reader Interactions

120Comments

  1. 1.

    stinger

    February 24, 2018 at 12:58 pm

    Good news! And happy belated birthday!

  2. 2.

    Doug R

    February 24, 2018 at 1:02 pm

    Squirrel of Dragons.

  3. 3.

    Jim

    February 24, 2018 at 1:02 pm

    This tweet came to mind:

    https://twitter.com/TVietor08/status/967179798001762304

  4. 4.

    artem1s

    February 24, 2018 at 1:08 pm

    I am listening to spring training game on MLB.com. Spring is almost here! yea! Baseball!

  5. 5.

    Arcadia Berger

    February 24, 2018 at 1:10 pm

    I hesitate to think what the benevolent but not always insightful AI known as “Cat Pictures, Please” will make of your search for “squirrel fur loss”: http://clarkesworldmagazine.com/kritzer_01_15/

  6. 6.

    NotMax

    February 24, 2018 at 1:11 pm

    Not enough coffee coursing through the system yet to focus on tracking down white squirrel music. Will a White Bird do in its stead?

    First track on a long, long time favorite album. So much so that purchased two when it came out and still have one in original shrink wrap – um – squirreled away somewhere.

  7. 7.

    cope

    February 24, 2018 at 1:15 pm

    The Illinois town of Olney is known for its population of 100-200 white squirrels, so there’s that.

  8. 8.

    Redshift

    February 24, 2018 at 1:18 pm

    Stuck in a restaurant with Fox on, with sound. Host just just asked, “is gun control the hill Democrats want to die on?”

    Sigh.

  9. 9.

    Schlemazel

    February 24, 2018 at 1:21 pm

    One thing I notice living in FLA was that the squirrels all looked mangy.

    Still celebrating the Ice Hockey gold. A lot of mention has been made that Kendall Coyne is engaged to Bronko’s OT Mike Schofield. We were invited to the parents tailgate party and there was some excitement about the fact he brought his SB ring. I got dragged up to see it. Here is a photo of him, Hannah Brandt’s dad is on his right & some homeless guy in a USA hockey haton the left. The ring weighs about 75 pounds.

  10. 10.

    Thoughtful David

    February 24, 2018 at 1:21 pm

    Question: Do any of you know if there is a website/database out there that keeps track of politicians being corrupt or immoral? This came up in regard to a bothsiderist discussion of Mo. Gov. Greitens getting busted the other day.
    My impression is very much that the preponderance of such things is on the Republican side, at least for the last 30 years or so, but I don’t have the data.

  11. 11.

    Aardvark Cheeselog

    February 24, 2018 at 1:21 pm

    There may be hundreds, for all I know, but I’ve never seen more than one at a time.

    Fair Witness.

  12. 12.

    Aardvark Cheeselog

    February 24, 2018 at 1:23 pm

    @Thoughtful David: Nobody who needed to be convinced would pay such a thing any attention. It would be some kind of corrupt libtard bullshit to them.

  13. 13.

    Thoughtful David

    February 24, 2018 at 1:25 pm

    @Aardvark Cheeselog: True. But it would be useful data nonetheless.

  14. 14.

    Betty Cracker

    February 24, 2018 at 1:27 pm

    @NotMax: Good song! I thought it was going to be this beloved (by me, anyway) Woodstock classic, which has white birds in the lyrics but not the title.

    @cope: Brevard, NC is also known for its white squirrels — they even have a festival! My mom, daughter and I took an RV trip up there back in aught-nine, and we looked high and low for white squirrels but never found one. Within a week of our return, I saw my first white squirrel here. We used to joke that it had stowed away on the RV.

  15. 15.

    The Fat Kate Middleton

    February 24, 2018 at 1:30 pm

    That’s an honest-to-god white squirrel there. We’ve had three in our back yard so far, but two of them are albino squirrels, with bright red eyes. The other was a leukistic squirrel, with a pale gold stripe down its white back. (We also had a leukistic hairy woodpecker at our feeders – that was a seriously weird-looking bird!)

  16. 16.

    JPL

    February 24, 2018 at 1:30 pm

    @Schlemazel: Nice!

  17. 17.

    MomSense

    February 24, 2018 at 1:31 pm

    I slipped and fell last night while taking my dog out to pee in the middle of an ice and freezing rain storm. My hand is a little scraped up but the worst thing is my left hip and lower back. I’m going to skip the gym today and see if some easy stretching helps.

  18. 18.

    Elizabelle

    February 24, 2018 at 1:32 pm

    Hello recent birthday Betty. I love these threads with your mutant Florida wildlife. Far preferred to anything Dana Loesch. (All that exposure is not in our contract!)

    Trying to catch up with my friend in Germany. They and most of Europe are experiencing Siberian air, and polar chill, that is maybe headed our way next week. It’s balmy today. I see new blossoms on a few trees.

  19. 19.

    Brachiator

    February 24, 2018 at 1:34 pm

    Isn’t a squirrel without fur a rat?

  20. 20.

    Ceci n est pas mon nym

    February 24, 2018 at 1:35 pm

    Never saw a white squirrel, but there were plenty of black squirrels where I grew up in Syracuse. My father-in-law, from NYC (which is not that far but doesn’t have them) was convinced they were escapees from some sort of experiment at the University.

  21. 21.

    germy

    February 24, 2018 at 1:36 pm

    Iron Stache or Cathy Myers?

    She says he refuses to debate her.

    1/10 Like too many women, I know what it's like to prepare, work hard & be successful only to be ignored in favor of a less qualified man https://t.co/0I2A19s67L— Cathy Myers (@CathyMyersWI) October 5, 2017

    She says some things about his past positions I didn’t know about.

  22. 22.

    No Drought No More

    February 24, 2018 at 1:37 pm

    Did Trump just cut Manafort loose? Ty Cobb (the other one) just released a statement claiming that neither Manafort or Gates have anything to do with the White House and that’s that. It’s hard to see how Manny could fail to see it otherwise, or so it seems to me. Now picture Montgomery Burns as the fingers of his hands gently tap each other while he murmurs, “excellent”.

  23. 23.

    smintheus

    February 24, 2018 at 1:43 pm

    From an earlier thread today:

    “You know what the qualifications are for president? Thirty-five and born here. That’s not qualifications! That’s the search terms of a sad lady on a Match.com profile.”

    There are fewer qualifications to get elected president than to get a driver’s license. Has Trump ever gotten a driver’s license?

  24. 24.

    NotMax

    February 24, 2018 at 1:44 pm

    Was leery reading about cooking spaghetti with store-bought sauce* all at once in the Instant Pot. Tried it the other night and hot diggity, it works! Bonus: only the single pot to clean.

    *Doctored to taste, natch.

  25. 25.

    Betty Cracker

    February 24, 2018 at 1:46 pm

    @Brachiator: Nope! Squirrels have fancy tails. Makes all the difference!

  26. 26.

    trollhattan

    February 24, 2018 at 1:51 pm

    @Brachiator:
    Day rats.

    Climate change? Why are arctic squirrels in Florida huh, hippies?!?

  27. 27.

    Bill Arnold

    February 24, 2018 at 1:52 pm

    Re id-ing of squirrel individuals, my father used to capture grey squirrels gorging on sunflower seeds at a bird feeder, with a live (havahart) trap, then spray paint the tails yellow with fluorescent yellow paint then release them miles away on the other side of a lake. He never saw a returnee. Never heard tales of yellow-tailed squirrels either, though there were probably local legends.

  28. 28.

    Catherine D.

    February 24, 2018 at 1:53 pm

    The (former) Seneca Army Depot is well-known for white deer. I’ve always wondered what was buried there …

  29. 29.

    NotMax

    February 24, 2018 at 1:54 pm

    Worth a mention, I suppose. D-list (and only just squeaked onto that ranking) super-hero, Squirrel Girl.

  30. 30.

    trollhattan

    February 24, 2018 at 1:55 pm

    @Redshift:
    Yesterday’s David Brooks Friday p.m. NPR blathering had him saying essentially this: Democrats complaining about Trump and his followers only encourages them so if Democrats are serious about countering Trump they cannot loudly complain about Trump.

    I am not making this up.

  31. 31.

    Mike J

    February 24, 2018 at 1:57 pm

    @NotMax:

    Not enough coffee coursing through the system yet to focus on tracking down white squirrel music.

    X
    She’s a white squirrel
    But I’m living with a white squirrel
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aLXOLlvoEBY

  32. 32.

    NotMax

    February 24, 2018 at 1:57 pm

    @trollhattan

    Surfeit of nuts in Florida, silly.

    :)

  33. 33.

    Mnemosyne

    February 24, 2018 at 1:58 pm

    Someone else posted this a day or two ago, but it turns out that flying squirrels have far more control over their flights than scientists initially thought. They can do maneuvers that are impossible for airplanes or even birds.

  34. 34.

    Brachiator

    February 24, 2018 at 2:01 pm

    OT Friendly Reminder. The IRS processed and released a huge load of refunds this week. Also, phone and email scams have increased dramatically. Often scammers have some personal details and insist on immediate payment of some supposed debt.

    Don’t engage. Minimize conversation since you may be recorded and your words twisted for other uses.

    The IRS never contacts people by phone for tax related matters.

    Nor do they use squirrels.

  35. 35.

    Amir Khalid

    February 24, 2018 at 2:05 pm

    @trollhattan:
    Interesting how that ilk always argues that the Democratic party’s best course on any given issue is paralysis.

  36. 36.

    NotMax

    February 24, 2018 at 2:06 pm

    @Brachiator

    And do go the extra mile to report them.

  37. 37.

    trollhattan

    February 24, 2018 at 2:09 pm

    @Amir Khalid:
    Pretty much this. They like their Democrats like their women: silent and feckless.

  38. 38.

    Baud

    February 24, 2018 at 2:12 pm

    @Redshift:

    Host just just asked, “is gun control the hill Democrats want to die on?”

    I’d prefer we die on that hill than continue to see the kids die in school.

  39. 39.

    tobie

    February 24, 2018 at 2:14 pm

    @germy: Thanks for letting us know who the other Democratic candidate is for Paul Ryan’s House seat. I’ve refrained from donating to Iron Stache’s campaign because I dislike his whole cultural appeal shtick (i.e., “I’m a working man, I speak for working men, lunch-bucket guys, etc.”) and vagueness on policy. I’ll look into what Cathy Myers’ positions are.

  40. 40.

    Mnemosyne

    February 24, 2018 at 2:14 pm

    Since I know there are some other bicycle and outdoors folks here, it turns out that Camelbak, Bell, and Giro are all owned by the same arms manufacturer.

    Not one more dime from me.

  41. 41.

    Baud

    February 24, 2018 at 2:14 pm

    @trollhattan: The best cure for their advice is winning.

  42. 42.

    Mnemosyne

    February 24, 2018 at 2:18 pm

    @tobie:

    I’m slightly wary of Myers because Sanders worshippers and other troublemakers are suddenly popping up to challenge the only Democrats who were willing to try and run against people like Ryan and Issa pre-Trump. I have no actual information, but it makes me nervous that unknown people are suddenly coming out of the woodwork.

  43. 43.

    Corner Stone

    February 24, 2018 at 2:19 pm

    @MomSense:

    I slipped and fell last night while taking my dog out to pee in the middle of an ice and freezing rain storm.

    Damn, Cole! I would have thought you’d have learned your lesson after the whole shoulder thing.
    Oh, wait…today may suck but tomorrow is going to be much less fun.

  44. 44.

    Betty Cracker

    February 24, 2018 at 2:20 pm

    @Bill Arnold: LOL! I’ve always wondered how far they range.

  45. 45.

    trollhattan

    February 24, 2018 at 2:20 pm

    @Mnemosyne:
    Who knew? Bell helmet, check. Giro helmet and other stuff, check. Camelbak stuff, check. Bushnell binos, check.

    Suspect each brand was acquired, as they all started independently.

  46. 46.

    Corner Stone

    February 24, 2018 at 2:21 pm

    @tobie: I like Iron Stache, from what I have seen of him. I think he plays it pretty straight on the working man/family man schtick. The ads I have seen from him show his mom and talk about how hard she worked before she couldn’t anymore. You may be right, I just don’t know. And I wonder where this D challenger has been for the last 15 or months?

  47. 47.

    Baud

    February 24, 2018 at 2:22 pm

    @Corner Stone:

    She didn’t say she was naked, so not really Cole-like.

  48. 48.

    Yutsano

    February 24, 2018 at 2:23 pm

    @Brachiator:

    Nor do they use squirrels.

    *pushes squirrel cage discreetly under desk*

    This is especially important if the supposed refund that shows up is much larger than expected or you get one suddenly without having filed your return yet. If you get a DD tell your back to contact their Automated Clearing House to reverse it. Paper checks should be voided and returned immediately.

  49. 49.

    Baud

    February 24, 2018 at 2:24 pm

    Apparently, the n-word triggers moderation.

    I’m of course talking about naked.

  50. 50.

    tobie

    February 24, 2018 at 2:24 pm

    @Mnemosyne: I understand the worry but I’m not sure it applies in this case. Iron Stache is something of a BernieBro and he’s already been endorsed by Sanders himself.

  51. 51.

    sukabi

    February 24, 2018 at 2:26 pm

    @Thoughtful David: quick Google search comes up with these….

    State and local politician convicts

    Federal political convicts there a couple more linked lists within the wiki article.

    And the link to the Google search

  52. 52.

    Mnemosyne

    February 24, 2018 at 2:26 pm

    @trollhattan:

    I’m looking at two Camelbak products from where I sit on my couch, plus I know I have Giro helmets and gloves. I wouldn’t be surprised if they were acquired after they became established brands — that’s what tobacco companies did once they realized the party was over and there would be a lot more restrictions on their products.

    Still, not one more dime from me.

  53. 53.

    Brachiator

    February 24, 2018 at 2:27 pm

    @Mnemosyne:

    Someone else posted this a day or two ago, but it turns out that flying squirrels have far more control over their flights than scientists initially thought. They can do maneuvers that are impossible for airplanes or even birds.

    This is old news. This has been fully documented in the Rocky and Bullwinkle programs.;)

    Why do you think he was Rocket J Squirrel?

    ETA. Rocky learned his aerial skills at the Cedar Yorpantz Flying School.

  54. 54.

    Baud

    February 24, 2018 at 2:27 pm

    Test

  55. 55.

    NotMax

    February 24, 2018 at 2:29 pm

    @sukabi

    Ooh, has Alain jiggered things so that more than three links (including the reply link) no longer sends one to FYWP purgatory?

  56. 56.

    Mnemosyne

    February 24, 2018 at 2:29 pm

    @tobie:

    Either way, I’ll probably stay out of the primary and wait until the general election to donate. Exurban Wisconsin (which is where Janesville is) can be pretty bigoted and sexist, so I’m not sure how good Myers’ chances would be in the general.

  57. 57.

    HeleninEire

    February 24, 2018 at 2:31 pm

    Loving on your Twitter avitar, Betty. My Facebook Profile pic is Patsy Stone from Ab Fab. Because of course it is.

  58. 58.

    sukabi

    February 24, 2018 at 2:33 pm

    @NotMax: I thought about that after I posted…seems like it worked, or the links are important enough that even WordPress won’t füçk with them?

  59. 59.

    WereBear

    February 24, 2018 at 2:36 pm

    @MomSense: Ice is the worst. Feel better.

  60. 60.

    Corner Stone

    February 24, 2018 at 2:38 pm

    @Baud:

    Test

    Dammit! Another one I failed to prepare for. Am I back in school or is this just one long unending nightmare? *Checks TV* Trump is still alive. Yep, it’s a nightmare.

  61. 61.

    Baud

    February 24, 2018 at 2:40 pm

    @Corner Stone: FYWP booted me for using the N-word. “n a k e d”

  62. 62.

    germy

    February 24, 2018 at 2:42 pm

    @Mnemosyne:

    I’m slightly wary of Myers because Sanders worshippers and other troublemakers are suddenly popping up to challenge the only Democrats who were willing to try and run against people like Ryan and Issa pre-Trump. I have no actual information, but it makes me nervous that unknown people are suddenly coming out of the woodwork.

    Sanders is endorsing Randy Bryce.

    5/10 Randy thinks he's "the candidate Latinos have been waiting for" but supported state/local enforcement of immigration law his last race pic.twitter.com/7uO8gsZu4S— Cathy Myers (@CathyMyersWI) October 5, 2017

    7/10 Randy supported restrictions on abortion until July of this year, but I've advocated for a woman's right to choose since high school pic.twitter.com/48R2zTbamX— Cathy Myers (@CathyMyersWI) October 5, 2017

    8/10 Randy is a union leader that has never been elected union officer. I've served as union president, VP & led a successful 3-week strike— Cathy Myers (@CathyMyersWI) October 5, 2017

  63. 63.

    NotMax

    February 24, 2018 at 2:42 pm

    @Corner Stone

    Psst.

    The answer to #1 is “jackals.”

  64. 64.

    Baud

    February 24, 2018 at 2:44 pm

    @germy:

    Randy supported restrictions on abortion until July of this year,

    After July, however, abort away, ladies!

  65. 65.

    Mnemosyne

    February 24, 2018 at 2:47 pm

    @germy:

    Like I said, I will most likely continue stay out of it until a candidate is chosen (I haven’t donated to the ‘Stache, either). If Myers is able to convince primary voters in WI to choose her, I will happily donate. I suspect that Bryce’s Blue Doggish qualities may be more appealing in Janesville, but we shall see. I’d be thrilled to be proven wrong and see a liberal woman beat Paul Ryan like a drum.

  66. 66.

    germy

    February 24, 2018 at 2:50 pm

    @Mnemosyne: The main thing here is that Paul Ryan returns to the private sector. We need him out of government.

  67. 67.

    Betty Cracker

    February 24, 2018 at 2:51 pm

    @HeleninEire: I almost went with Bubble, but we’d just seen Serial Mom. :)

  68. 68.

    Baud

    February 24, 2018 at 2:51 pm

    @germy: Hear hear!

  69. 69.

    MattF

    February 24, 2018 at 2:54 pm

    @Brachiator: A squirrel is a rat with a long tail. At least that’s what an ex-girlfriend of mine claimed. It’s fair to note that she didn’t like squirrels.

  70. 70.

    trollhattan

    February 24, 2018 at 2:55 pm

    @Mnemosyne:
    We need Cliff Notes. Another sporting goods corporation dealt the brands to Vista two years ago.

    On February 25th, 2016, BRG Sports announced its acceptance of a $400-million cash and earn-out deal to sell its “Action Sports” business to Vista Outdoor. Vista gained control of the Bell Sports, Giro, Blackburn, and C-Preme brands.

  71. 71.

    donnah

    February 24, 2018 at 2:56 pm

    @Brachiator:

    I got a phishing call the other day about the IRS collecting a debt. It was a recorded message with a threatening tone. I copied down the phone number they gave me but didn’t call it. I sent it to the IRS information site and hope they can catch these criminals.

  72. 72.

    Major Major Major Major

    February 24, 2018 at 2:56 pm

    Reminds me that I should give the poor, poor squirrels in my comic some agency.

  73. 73.

    efgoldman

    February 24, 2018 at 2:56 pm

    @Brachiator:

    Isn’t a squirrel without fur a rat?

    And a squirrel with fur is a furry rat with a bushy tail.

  74. 74.

    germy

    February 24, 2018 at 2:59 pm

    @Baud: Was he ever IN the private sector?

  75. 75.

    Ruckus

    February 24, 2018 at 2:59 pm

    @trollhattan:
    Well as usual anything he says is opposite of the truth. Not just not true but 180 deg out. So if he’s saying that we should stop talking about drumpf because it’s encouraging his base, we know for sure that we are getting to drumpf and his supporters and need to keep it up.

  76. 76.

    NotMax

    February 24, 2018 at 3:00 pm

    @Major Major Major Major

    Not your comic but Morocco Mole didn’t get no respect, it all gravitated to the squirrel.

  77. 77.

    Joyce H

    February 24, 2018 at 3:00 pm

    @cope:

    The Illinois town of Olney is known for its population of 100-200 white squirrels, so there’s that.

    I used to live in Olney! The white squirrels were their claim to fame – “Home of the White Squirrels”. The squirrels in Olney, though, were albinos. They had red eyes. And what always amused me – the local PD had white squirrel patches on their uniforms.

  78. 78.

    Mnemosyne

    February 24, 2018 at 3:00 pm

    @Major Major Major Major:

    If you’re ever down in my neck of the woods, I know a place where the squirrels will eat out of your hand.

    They strongly discourage it, but people are unable to resist.

  79. 79.

    Baud

    February 24, 2018 at 3:01 pm

    @germy: Not to my recollection.

  80. 80.

    MattF

    February 24, 2018 at 3:01 pm

    @Mnemosyne: There’s a long and dishonorable tradition of scientists making incorrect statements about aerodynamic capabilities of flying animals. In reality it’s just– complicated, hard to measure, and hard to explain. Goes along with the fact that, about once every decade, everyone suddenly realizes that we all don’t really understand how airplanes fly.

  81. 81.

    trollhattan

    February 24, 2018 at 3:02 pm

    @donnah:
    I got a hilarious phone call last week from a Kentucky area code (likely spoofed) warning me of four “very serious charges” against me and that if I did not call the number that day the matter would be handed over to “the local cops.”

    Ur mah gurrrd, anybody but the local cops!

  82. 82.

    Baud

    February 24, 2018 at 3:02 pm

    @MattF: Aerodynamic lift. You can’t explain that.

  83. 83.

    NotMax

    February 24, 2018 at 3:03 pm

    @germy

    Oscar Mayer Wienermobile driver. He peddled baloney.

    (Insert your own jokes here.)

  84. 84.

    trollhattan

    February 24, 2018 at 3:03 pm

    @Ruckus:
    My feeling as well. I can practically hear them sweat.

  85. 85.

    MattF

    February 24, 2018 at 3:04 pm

    @Baud: You’ll get different opinions about that.

  86. 86.

    Major Major Major Major

    February 24, 2018 at 3:05 pm

    @Mnemosyne: Eh, wild rodents. I’m gonna go to the park in Japan where deer eat out of your hand, though.

  87. 87.

    germy

    February 24, 2018 at 3:05 pm

    @NotMax:

    He peddled baloney.

    Like his favorite author.

  88. 88.

    Mnemosyne

    February 24, 2018 at 3:06 pm

    @MattF:

    Did you read the article? It’s actually pretty interesting — it turns out that the squirrels have very precise control over their “wings” and can do things like carry large pine cones that should prevent them from staying airborne.

    It has cool photos, too.

  89. 89.

    Ruckus

    February 24, 2018 at 3:07 pm

    @NotMax:
    I normally don’t answer the phone for numbers I don’t know, let them leave a VM and I’ll call them back if important. However there is the occasional call I do answer. If it is in any way a scam it’s fun because I get to practice my sailor talk. First you have to keep an even, normal tone, second you have to be coherent, third to be real sailor talk every other word must be a swear word. Fourth, too much repetition in #3 shows a lack of imagination and slacking off and is to be avoided. If done properly they hang up in less than 15 seconds and never call back.

  90. 90.

    donnah

    February 24, 2018 at 3:07 pm

    @trollhattan:

    The area code on this call was 360, which is outside Seattle, I think. It was recorded by a man with a very serious tone and threatened prosecution and potential arrest if not followed up with. I already knew that the IRS did not do business via the phone and promptly copied down the number so I could turn them in.

    But people who don’t know better could easily be fooled. I hate this kind of crap.

  91. 91.

    MattF

    February 24, 2018 at 3:10 pm

    @donnah: I’ve gotten calls like that– my policy is just don’t answer the phone, although I’m often tempted to ask them “Does your mother know you make a living by trying to frighten and defraud elderly people?”

  92. 92.

    HinTN

    February 24, 2018 at 3:10 pm

    @NotMax: I saw them years ago at Atlanta Fulton County stadium. It had been a long rainy summer day and they came on late. Just as they began to play the setting sun broke through and shone a beam on the stage. Oh yeah, it was a beautiful day.

  93. 93.

    Mike J

    February 24, 2018 at 3:10 pm

    @germy:

    The main thing here is that Paul Ryan returns to the private sector.

    He’s never been in it so he can;’t return.

  94. 94.

    Ninedragonspot

    February 24, 2018 at 3:14 pm

    @Ruckus: When I get scam calls, I sometimes say, “I’m so glad you’ve called. I’ve just finished writing a poem. May I read it to you?”

    Then I pull some Tennyson off the shelf…

  95. 95.

    Major Major Major Major

    February 24, 2018 at 3:16 pm

    @Ninedragonspot: I get at least one call a day “from” either Houston, Atlanta, or the exchange my phone has, with one of three recorded spam calls. I just don’t answer numbers I don’t know.

  96. 96.

    gbbalto

    February 24, 2018 at 3:18 pm

    @Major Major Major Major: I went to that island! The deer come up and harass you, and will eat your guidebook if you haven’t put it away..

    ETA Yes they will eat out of your hand but they are fucking aggressive about it.

  97. 97.

    Corner Stone

    February 24, 2018 at 3:18 pm

    @Major Major Major Major: Why won’t you answer me! Or Suburban Dianne in Hotlanta?

  98. 98.

    Major Major Major Major

    February 24, 2018 at 3:19 pm

    @gbbalto: That sounds great.

    @Corner Stone: I think you know why.

  99. 99.

    Betty Cracker

    February 24, 2018 at 3:19 pm

    @Ninedragonspot: Diabolically brilliant!

  100. 100.

    NotMax

    February 24, 2018 at 3:24 pm

    @Ninedragonspot

    Better yet, Robert Service.

    :)

  101. 101.

    Corner Stone

    February 24, 2018 at 3:25 pm

    @Major Major Major Major: You’re not interested in a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to take advantage of a fantastic MLM at the foundation stage?

  102. 102.

    Ninedragonspot

    February 24, 2018 at 3:26 pm

    @Major Major Major Major: Reasonable, of course.

    Occasionally, though, I feel impish.

    Had a spam call a couple weeks back from a number spoofing the Chinese Consulate in SF. A friend told me this has been happening a lot and the Consulate is Displeased.

  103. 103.

    Mnemosyne

    February 24, 2018 at 3:26 pm

    @NotMax:

    Lewis Carroll, as long as one can pronounce “brillig” smoothly.

  104. 104.

    Ruckus

    February 24, 2018 at 3:27 pm

    @trollhattan:
    I love the sound of dripping conservative sweat. Of course you have to listen to a ton of bullshit to catch the sound of a drop but still……

  105. 105.

    donnah

    February 24, 2018 at 3:28 pm

    My home phone is still a landline because I have a business and don’t want my personal cell phone to be filled with business calls. I have an answering machine, but I try to answer calls coming in because they may be a student or customer whose number I wouldn’t know offhand. And we’ve been on the Do Not Call list for years. So the occasional rotten apple comes along.

  106. 106.

    Mnemosyne

    February 24, 2018 at 3:30 pm

    On the one hand, it’s a little creepy that web merchants know when I’ve been visiting their site to browse stuff.

    On the other, they just sent me a 50 percent off coupon that I can use for the jacket I want to buy but was waiting for a sale.

  107. 107.

    NotMax

    February 24, 2018 at 3:30 pm

    @Mnemosyne

    Wish unfulfilled is to once – just once – hear a weather reporter forecast “and for tomorrow, mostly brillig.”

  108. 108.

    Ruckus

    February 24, 2018 at 3:31 pm

    @Ninedragonspot:
    You don’t have it memorized? For shame!
    I find my process is more fool proof. Because if the fools talk back I can always up my game. And now T Mobile allows one to block calls from a specific number. That’s very nice. They don’t however allow you to block VM from the same number. Baby steps.

  109. 109.

    Jake the antisoshul soshulist

    February 24, 2018 at 3:34 pm

    @Redshift:
    Sounds like a threat to me.

  110. 110.

    Jake the antisoshul soshulist

    February 24, 2018 at 3:37 pm

    We have have white squirrels here in KY. At one time they were only common on the local college campus, buut have since spread around the city. Our cat brought a live one in once. Had a hell ova time catching it to get it out of the house.

  111. 111.

    Ninedragonspot

    February 24, 2018 at 3:39 pm

    @Ruckus: my memory’s not that good, and sometimes it takes a couple minutes for the joke to play out.

    Once I got the response, “I don’t have time for this, sir, and I’m sure you don’t either.” I replied, “Oh, nonsense! Here we go!” I pulled Wordsworth’s “Prelude” off the shelf, but it was a volume that had different editions of the poem on facing pages, so I inadvertently read a lot of the same material twice.

    Nice pome, tho.

  112. 112.

    Ruckus

    February 24, 2018 at 3:46 pm

    @Ninedragonspot:
    That inadvertent mistake is gold. They don’t know and if you got to the second page you wasted a lot of their time, keeping them from doing the same to others.
    Whatever works for you is fine, maybe I should learn to rhyme my swearing. Or swear in poems. Of course that’s been done but maybe there’s a twist to it. Hey a writing career! A sailors fucking poems.

  113. 113.

    Kayla Rudbek

    February 24, 2018 at 3:47 pm

    @Bill Arnold: that is even better than my grandpa, who lived in Minneapolis and would drive the squirrels he trapped over the Mississippi River into St. Paul and released them over there. (I would joke that one of my great-uncles or other Italian relatives was then catching squirrels in St. Paul and releasing them in Minneapolis)

  114. 114.

    NotMax

    February 24, 2018 at 3:50 pm

    @Kayla Rudbek

    Resided in St. Paul for a while.

    That explains a lot.

    ;)

  115. 115.

    jon

    February 24, 2018 at 5:12 pm

    Who wore it better? The squirrel or this guy?

  116. 116.

    Aleta

    February 24, 2018 at 6:05 pm

    Beautiful pictures of flying squirrels. Moonlight gliders.

    Funny how much they look like parachute gliders.

  117. 117.

    Matt McIrvin

    February 24, 2018 at 6:44 pm

    @NotMax: Squirrel Girl is moving up in the world! She has her own book and it’s awesome (my daughter is a big fan).

  118. 118.

    schrodingers_cat

    February 24, 2018 at 6:56 pm

    I love BC’s petite and white Florida squirrels. They look so much daintier than the big grey variety I see running around here.

  119. 119.

    Tata

    February 24, 2018 at 7:19 pm

    Thought black squirrels were only in the UK and Princeton, but that’s wrong. They’re all over the place, and in my tiny town, 19.7 miles north of Princeton. Saw one today.

  120. 120.

    workworkwork

    February 25, 2018 at 5:07 pm

    @NotMax: I’ve done this with other types of pasta. I found a really good low-sugar garlic marinara in the store (I add a couple of minced cloves, though).
    Just five minutes at pressure. Super easy and as you say, not much cleanup.

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