Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

The poor and middle-class pay taxes, the rich pay accountants, the wealthy pay politicians.

… pundit janitors mopping up after the GOP

Republicans are the party of chaos and catastrophe.

Speaking of republicans, is there a way for a political party to declare intellectual bankruptcy?

Optimism opens the door to great things.

Sadly, there is no cure for stupid.

Motto for the House: Flip 5 and lose none.

DeSantis transforms Florida into 1930s Germany with gators and theme parks.

In short, I come down firmly on all sides of the issue.

Republicans are radicals, not conservatives.

Happy indictment week to all who celebrate!

If you are still in the GOP, you are an extremist.

I really should read my own blog.

Damn right I heard that as a threat.

Today’s GOP: why go just far enough when too far is right there?

Following reporting rules is only for the little people, apparently.

I’d like to think you all would remain faithful to me if i ever tried to have some of you killed.

Technically true, but collectively nonsense

No Justins, No Peace

That’s my take and I am available for criticism at this time.

Thanks for reminding me that Van Jones needs to be slapped.

The cruelty is the point; the law be damned.

People are complicated. Love is not.

Within six months Twitter will be fully self-driving.

You are here: Home / Humorous / A Break From All That

A Break From All That

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Hey, everybody.  Just prairie-dogging here, coming up from book-hell to say “hi.”  I’m sure I’m not alone in having just about every working day disrupted by Trumpian and GOP dysfunction — which is what I blame the fact that my book is a crooked number of Friedman Units overdue.

Still, while I can’t really blog till the ms is in to my long suffering editors, I find myself needing antidotes to political madness, and I figure some of our fellow jackals might too.  So, w/out further ado, here’s some brain candy.

First up, horse twitter:

My favorite in this vein is one from the GoS:

Justify won the Belmont Stakes, becoming the 13th triple Crown winner, and turned down an invitation to the White House. Asked why, the winner neighed, “If I wanted to see a horse’s ass, I would’ve finished second.”

And now, for a true hit of the absurd, a couple of noodle advertisements from the Japanese packaged food company, Nissin.  First up, this piece of majesty and terror:

 

And next, one so wholly bonkers I can only let it speak for itself:

 

I find solace in the fact that, no matter how crabbed and pinched a view of the world and its joys Trump and his party seek to gaslight the rest of us into sharing, it is, in fact, irreducibly stranger and more fun than they’ll ever know.

This thread?

It’s more open than a Best Buy on Black Friday.

Reader Interactions

148Comments

  2. 2.

    TenguPhule

    And now, for a true hit of the absurd, a couple of noodle advertisements from the Japanese packaged food company, Nissin.

    This is nothing. Look for the old Japanese Sega Dreamcast System commercials.

  3. 3.

    Baud

    I think the Baud! 2020! campaign has found its message.

    The sun poses a significant threat to modern life on Earth. 

    While the other candidates ignore the solar threat, Baud! has a eight-point plan that will defeat the sun once and for all.

  6. 6.

    M4

    My day is pretty alright! Two companies offered to fly me out to NY for final-round interviews so I’m feeling smart and capable for once. Which is funny since I was very sure I’d royally fucked up one of their interviews yesterday. Yay depression!

    I know I got roundly mocked here last time I shared good job hunt news so screw you guys in advance.

  7. 7.

    Steeplejack

    “Prairie-dogging” in line 1.

    “MS.” for one manuscript, “MSS.” for multiple; “mss” is right out. C’mon, man, you’re a professional writer throwing around pro-writer lingo!

  13. 13.

    Gin & Tonic

    @M4: Not many people can look forward to the prospect of reducing their housing costs by moving to NYC. Hope you get a solid bite.

  16. 16.

    M4

    @Gin & Tonic:

    Not many people can look forward to the prospect of reducing their housing costs by moving to NYC.

    This is a nontrivial reason for my move! Thanks.

    @Baud: you will be missed.

  17. 17.

    Gin & Tonic

    Oddly, neither of those commercials compels me to eat the product being advertised.

  20. 20.

    Yutsano

    @Gin & Tonic: I think that’s not the point for Japanese advertising. If it ever has a point beyond loud and obnoxious.

    Personally I haven’t had much in the way of an appetite for a few days. Ate some old cheese and have been fighting lingering nausea and such for a few days now. Just drank a bunch of milk of magnesia and gonna keep doing that. And eat some chicken soup tonight.

  22. 22.

    Bill Arnold

    @Baud:

    While the other candidates ignore the solar threat, Baud! has a eight-point plan that will defeat the sun once and for all.

    I’d suggest the lazy approach of just waiting it out, but there’s that pesky red giant phase.

    Now this is where things become a bit of a “good news/bad news” situation. The bad news, according to Schroder and Smith, is that the Earth will NOT survive the Sun’s expansion. Even though the Earth could expand to an orbit 50% more distant than where it is today (1.5 AUs), it won’t get the chance. The expanding Sun will engulf the Earth just before it reaches the tip of the red giant phase, and the Sun would still have another 0.25 AU and 500,000 years to grow.

    Solar flares, you say? Just details.

  24. 24.

    VeniceRiley

    How, is my day going, asked no one? I’m experiencing the slowest last hour in the history of a workday.
    I plan to follow this by experiencing the slowest commute to home; so I can record Maddow and hit the pool for a workout.
    Failing that (if there are kids in there-no go) I will watch her live and have a cocktail. And by cocktail, I mean whiskey polluted with ice.

    If Baud can do a 12 point plan in 8 points, he’s got my vote!

  25. 25.

    M4

    @Gin & Tonic:

    Not many people can look forward to the prospect of reducing their housing costs by moving to NYC.

    This is a non-insignificant motivator, for sure.

  30. 30.

    J R in WV

    @VeniceRiley:

    I like my whiskey with just a touch of branch water. Well actually, well water, it isn’t dipped out of the creek. Otherwise neat. About a tablespoon of water or two if it’s high proof liquor.

  31. 31.

    M4

    @Steeplejack: for sure. Fortunately I already did the live-programming and systems-trivia portions for both. I imagine they try not to spring for travel for total duds.

  35. 35.

    VeniceRiley

    @J R in WV: That’s about how much water I get from the cube melt before I’ve finished it off. Ha! I do prefer sweet tasting filtered store bought ice cubes, but I hate lugging the bag home.

  36. 36.

    lamh36

    ‘Sup Balloon Juice.

    Been a long day away from the city for me, but I finally made it back to the house about 2 hours ago. So I’m just catching up on things I missed.

    Oh, and I FINALLY finished my last blog post for my Australia trip with pics from my time in Sydney.

    You can check it out here, and I hope ya enjoy my pics. I’m pretty sure the post is longer than the Melbourne post, but I’m not really surprised because while I enjoyed Melbourne, Sydney was a much better fit for me picture taking-wise.

    Anyhoo, you’ve been warned… :-)
    G’Day Sydney!! Aussie VayKay BlackNOLAGirlInOz…Sydney Dreamin’

  37. 37.

    sukabi

    @Bill Arnold: 500,000 years from now? Who says there will be anything left to incinerate?

    Between Trump’s blow everything up now M.O. and Baud’s 8 point plan if we make it through the next 2 years we’ll be lucky.

  40. 40.

    different-church-lady

    1998: “We’ll all make our living selling our stuff to each other on EBay!”

    2008: “We’ll all make our living selling houses to each other!”

    2018: “We’ll all make our living driving each other around and sleeping in each others’ houses!”

  41. 41.

    Mnemosyne

    If you’re the kind of person who really, really cares about the difference between “affect” and “effect,” then proofreading is probably for you.

    Personally, I love that shit.

  45. 45.

    M4

    @Mary G: not sure whether to tell them about each other unless I end up with two offers. We’ll see how the schedules shake out.

  46. 46.

    divF

    @M4: My day is less than alright. I’m in DC, on the second day of a review panel, and my shirt is soaked from walking the .3 miles from the restaurant to the hotel. I am so glad to be going home tomorrow.

    I keep thinking of different abbreviations of your former name. 4K, 10^12, and 1T come to mind.

  48. 48.

    MagdaInBlack

    Waiting to for my lunch today, the young man in front of me was having trouble with his English; the cashier asked him if it would be easier for him in Spanish. He visibly relaxed, and finished ordering.
    I told her she had warmed my heart.

  49. 49.

    HAL

    Huh…

    Press secretary Sarah Sanders and principal deputy press secretary Raj Shah are both heading for the exits, according to sources inside the White House and close to the administration. Sanders, who has become a confidante of President Trump since the departure of former communications director Hope Hicks, has told friends that she plans to leave the administration at the end of the year.

    https://www.cbsnews.com/news/sarah-sanders-raj-shah-planning-to-depart-the-white-house/

  50. 50.

    M4

    @divF: sounds dreadful. It cracked 75 here today so I know how you feel ?

    I’d like to keep my nym but will wait until we get the mobile form entry persistence fixed.

  55. 55.

    Jack the Cold Warrior

    Never knew Japanese noodles create such violent conflict….

    Never feed them to Trump!!!!!!!

  59. 59.

    chris

    Some good news from Charlie Stross. The British press may be starting to turn on the Brexiteers, some of whom were also involved with tRump and the campaign.

    From Charlie himself in the comments:”…what we’re seeing is the equivalent of Fox News turning on Trump and the New York Times going into Watergate Investigation target-seeking mode on the alt-right. It’s spectacular. Where it leads? Who the hell knows.”

    A boy can hope, right?

    And some bad news. Balance! Not for the faint of heart.

  61. 61.

    Platonailedit

    I hire only the best people.

    "Nobody wants to come in," a source close to the administration said. "So they've gone through two rounds and now they're at 3rd tier of people who are just lucking out—battlefield promotion ends up promoting people who aren't qualified for the position.

    " https://t.co/1WfxS2oC6m— Kyle Griffin (@kylegriffin1) June 14, 2018

  62. 62.

    M4

    @Dorothy Winsor: thanks, so I hear, I’ve never done this before.

    @Dorothy Winsor: I get really annoyed by incorrect or imprecise verb tenses. Six years of Latin in catholic school ruined me. Subjunctive I’m less of a stickler about, probably because ours is so weak.

  72. 72.

    Steve in the ATL

    @M4:

    I imagine they try not to spring for travel for total duds.

    Have you ever seen the movie “dinner for schmucks”?

  73. 73.

    TenguPhule

    Secretary of State Mike Pompeo, who traveled to Seoul to brief South Korean officials, said the next step in negotiations had not been decided, but added that he expected to “begin the engagement” with North Korea within the next week.

    Speaking with reporters, he said that the Trump administration hoped to complete the “major disarmament” of North Korea within the next 2½ years without defining what that would entail.

    Every day in every way they LIE LIE LIE.

  74. 74.

    TenguPhule

    @M4:

    I heard that some people even make a living nowadays by pretending to be somebody else, in talking moving pictures! Can you imagine?

    How dare you Suh! Voice acting is a perfectly respectable profession. Ah am outraged, outraged do you he’a me! //

  76. 76.

    zhena gogolia

    @M4:

    I think she was referring to the period when people were just frantically buying and selling houses, and also buying houses they really couldn’t afford on the assumption that the value would just keep going up and up.

  77. 77.

    Mike in NC

    Certainly the horse’s ass squatting in the Oval Office would look a lot better in a filthy barn.

  79. 79.

    El Caganer

    Two members of the Norwegian parliament have nominated Donald Trump for the Nobel Peace Prize according to Fortune.

  82. 82.

    magurakurin

    My wife loves that Chicken Ramen commercial. She went out and bought some the very next day after she saw it.

  83. 83.

    NotMax

    Assiduously working to convince myself to put off mowing for another day.

    Smart money is on this being successful.

  86. 86.

    ??? Goku (aka Amerikan Baka)  ??

    @M4:
    Good for you! Hope you knock em dead and enjoy NYC while you’re there. I preferred LA when I was there over NYC but the weather (winter) probably played a part in that.

  92. 92.

    tybee

    @The Midnight Lurker: a reasonable part of Glory was filmed in Savannah.
    i got to see several sets – particularly the one set on Isle of Hope.
    didn’t see any stars but saw lots of extras sweating bullets wearing those woolen uniforms in 95 degree weather.

  96. 96.

    Steeplejack

    More screenwriter gaffes. Bull tonight:

    Distraught defendant: “Your Honor, my son’s in the hospital. He’s waiting for me!”

    Judge: “Well, someone will just have to explain to him what happens when people flaunt the law.”

    No one in scene: “It’s flout, asshole.”

    Although I guess it could have been written correctly and mangled by the actor. I’ve seen that happen in my bush-league corporate media career.

  100. 100.

    lamh36

    Shoutout to The Root’s headline writer for this one…LOL

    Ha… Shoutout to the The Root’s headline writer!

    @TheRoot
    5m5 minutes ago
    More
    White House Wizardess of Weird Ass Lies Will Willingly Walk Away From Her Job: Report https://trib.al/6adcgZk

  101. 101.

    eemom

    @M4:

    LA is fine

    “….the sun shines most of the time, and the feeling is laid back….”

    Cyberkissies to anyone ancient enough to recognize that.

  102. 102.

    TenguPhule

    @El Caganer:

    Two members of the Norwegian parliament have nominated Donald Trump for the Nobel Peace Prize according to Fortune.

    Every man has his price.

  103. 103.

    lamh36

    I know this is supposed to be a leisure thread, but this thread…wow…I missed this being away from my computer.

    This is heartbreaking…

    No matter how you feel about immigration, “legal” or otherwise…this is just not right at all

    I mean…what about the little girls?

    I actually shudder to think of it. This country already treat white girls with barely any respect…lets not even talk about Black children…these are “illegals”, I just don’t even want to think bout the treatment they might be receiving.

    I’m a part of the first group of journalists to go into the shelter for detained child migrants in Brownsville Texas since the zero tolerance separation policy was announced. 1000+ boys here.

    Going in right now.

    More tonight w @chrislhayes on @allinwithchris @MSNBC. #inners
    https://twitter.com/jacobsoboroff/status/1007019318293553153

    oh and this is an invited visit…so even “cleaned” up for company, it still makes me sick

  104. 104.

    Ruckus

    @?BillinGlendaleCA:
    I’ve done a 3 week tour of NZ, it was spectacular. Sister asked what I liked best when she picked me up at LAX and I started naming off stuff and ended up saying “It was the people.” Even when something went wrong, everyone just pitched in and helped. I’ve had good times in lots of cities around the world but NZ was the best. If I was a couple of years younger I’d probably have emigrated there.

  105. 105.

    Josie

    @Dorothy Winsor: This made remember the difficulty I had when I was fresh out of college many years ago, teaching grammar to high school sophomores – more specifically lay, lie and lain. The ribald humor in the classroom that day was something to behold.

    ETA: It was obviously a more innocent time.

  109. 109.

    Mnemosyne

    @M4:

    Actually, I think Bay Area to NYC won’t be too bad of a transition. NYC winters aren’t great, but they’re not Chicago or Buffalo winters, and summers aren’t great, but they’re not Phoenix or Houston summers. Plus you guys are already used to public transportation and the crazy people thereon, so you won’t pine for a car.

  113. 113.

    lamh36

    Oooh…who’s got the popcorn.

    Per April Ryan, apparently the WH is fighting back at CBS over the reporting of the SHS leaving and the problem they are having hiring someone to repace her and Shah…

    @AprilDRyan
    I know a lot of phone lines are burning up about this story among White House staffers and White House folks calling @CBSNews. @CBSNews has not backed down. I see you @CBSNews
    https://twitter.com/AprilDRyan/status/1007072808189530112

  118. 118.

    schrodingers_cat

    @M4: Congrats and good luck with the next phase. If you move to NYC we are practically neighbors! (Well not really, but compared to California you will be a train ride away)

  125. 125.

    Mai naem mobile

    I wonder if any media org will hire Huckster or if she’s end up doing ‘consulting on how to deal with Trumpov’ like Reince. Or maybe she’ll be too busy with Mueller. Hope Daddy Huckster has to spend big money on lawyers for Huckster.

  127. 127.

    Gin & Tonic

    @Jager: There’s a really good whiskey bar in San Francisco called Hard Water. They give you an eyedropper for adding water to your drink.

  128. 128.

    Omnes Omnibus

    @Gin & Tonic: The right amount of water depends on the whisk(e)y and the moment. But then I am currently enjoying a Presbyterian, so what do I know?

  129. 129.

    Gin & Tonic

    @Omnes Omnibus: I learned “beer” is “øl” when I was there last month. I also learned that beer, no matter how you say it, is insanely expensive.

  134. 134.

    Jager

    @Gin & Tonic: I love going to the old school bar where they bring you ice, whiskey and a little pitcher of water. My old man would put ice in the glasse, fill it with water, drink it down and then pour in the whiskey. He also warned me against drinking any sweet drinks. I’ve been a scotch and whiskey guy since my late 20’s.

  135. 135.

    lamh36

    Alright alright…movie trailer news for today.

    Disney released a teaser trailer for their LIVE action Dumbo directed by Tim Burton!

    Dumbo – Official Trailer

    If this is Tim Burton at his best, this could be a real tearjerker and nostalgic…I mean just hearing the lilt bit of Baby Mine had me a bit verklempt…

    the big question though is will the film include the Jim Crows?

  136. 136.

    Platonailedit

    Asshole zuckerberg slowly killing his ‘baby’.

    Fewer people are using Facebook to discover and discuss news, as messaging apps such as WhatsApp gain in popularity, a study has suggested.

    The seventh annual Digital News Report said the fall in users accessing news on Facebook reflected concerns about privacy and the toxic nature of debate.

    Changes to Facebook’s algorithms, which had de-prioritised news in people’s feeds, had also played a part.

    Using Facebook for news has declined in a number of countries. In the US, for example, consumption is down 9% compared with 2017.

    And focus groups suggested this was partly due to the way people debated issues on the platform.

  138. 138.

    Ruckus

    @Dorothy Winsor:
    I actually liked a number of places in the world. Unfortunately a couple of them have worse winters than Los Angeles. Norway, Belgium, Denmark. NZ isn’t quite as bad, especially on the north island.

  140. 140.

    J R in WV

    @Mike in NC:

    Certainly the horse’s ass squatting in the Oval Office would look a lot better in a filthy barn.

    Horse barns are usually as sterile as possible, as horses are worth millions of dollars, if they have the right genetics. Unlike certain human horse’s asses.

  141. 141.

    Mnemosyne

    @lamh36:

    Okay, I’m going to put myself on the line and defend the Jim Crows as secretly subversive characters. Yes, they’re horrible stereotypes … who are also the only characters in the whole damn film who are kind and helpful to Dumbo and Timothy (the mouse).

    Hang on, I’m putting on my flameproof suit …

    (I can pretty much guarantee that they will be replaced in the live action version, though, because they no longer come across as subversive since we’ve moved past that specific stereotype.)

  147. 147.

    Mnemosyne

    @Omnes Omnibus:

    Ay-up. That’s them. They end up giving Dumbo a “magic” feather to help him fly, so they’re pretty much the only helpful characters in the whole dang movie. And they’re horrible, cringey stereotypes.

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