Scenes From the Flood by John Cole| September 9, 20185:25 pm| 162 CommentsThis post is in: John Cole Presents "This Fucking Old House"FacebookTweetEmailWe’re now in the third day of nonstop downpour: I think I’m gonna need another willow tree.
And Florence hasn’t even gotten there!
Or maybe some aquatic plants … or gold fish in your backyard.
This just came across the Twitters.
Major Major Major Major
Is that a bunch of oranges on your railing?
I’ve seen this movie somewhere.
Willow looks happy.
@Major Major Major Major:
‘maters. I think.
Just make sure to locate it further from your house than the current one.
Willows like to have their feet wet I thought.
Stay dry Cole
Sort of glad I’m heading for the high, dry desert!
Note: The housecat will be in good hands and won’t be affected by no electricity and no Internet, if it comes to that. And Threadkill Lane is not in an area prone to flooding.
Major Major Major Major
@trollhattan: that makes more sense.
If this is indeed the new normal, you might want to consider putting a rice paddy in your back yard. Wild rice, especially: a most useful grain!
I think you need drain pipes under the fence. It looks like your neighbors yards aren’t flooding. That water needs to go somewhere else.
One of the best family vacations I ever had was as a kid we stayed in a beach house. A hurricane went along the coast while we were there and churned up the ocean. We had the most amazing tidal pools with all kinds of shells and live starfish, plus the sea foam was so fluffed up it blew into these tidal pool mini coves and piled up over a foot deep. It was fun to walk knee high in sea foam. If you kicked it, little balls would break loose and go rolling across the sand like mini tumble weeds, collecting an outer coat of sand till the foam collapsed. It was also a bit cooler, not as hot.
Your vacation is not doomed yet, tho not safe either. Also storms kick up more shells after. Hope you have some luck.
That’s nice swimming hole you have back there
A Musicale with dancing dogs and droll Kat narration?
Maybe Florence can make it to Asheville NC and take my child raping mother out.
@Roger Moore: …and keep it planted far away from the blog, the current willow was planed too close to the blog and ate the edit function.
Roots get tangled in the router cables and it’s all over, friend. There’s no coming back from that.
I think those are all tears of the Steelers owner(s). Mr. Bell gonna get paid.
Cat 4 hitting NC/SC coast, could be looking at another Hugo. Maybe we’ll see a sharp unexpected turn north, but not looking good at this point.
Yeah, far be it from me telling Mr Cole what to do with his trees, but willows…..
They grow really fast, and get really big. And branches fall off.
John, don’t be afraid to aggressively prune that thing every winter. Keep it small.
Gonna have a nice crop of Spring Peepers after next year’s spring rains.
Yikes! It looks like a swimming pool, with the fence playing the role of sides to the cement pond, keeping all the water in.
When I was a kid, I always wanted a flood because I thought it would be so cool to get to swim everywhere. In my mind, the flood water was as clean and clear as the swimming pool.
@trollhattan: Yup, once those roots get into the tubes, it’s all over.
I have a small brick patio, about the size of your deck, which wasn’t built with drainage in mind so consequently it looks a little like your yard. Question: Why doesn’t being underwater kill the dandelions and other weeds growing up between the bricks? Can’t we get a break here?
I got married on the day Hugo began having effects north of where it made US landfall. We cut the cake just as the temperature began dropping 30 degrees in an hour, then wrapped up our outdoor reception. We knew people getting married the same day in Charleston. That didn’t happen. Hugo also nailed the Virgin Islands. The real problem is going to be the possible inland flooding. Along with your vacation. A lot of the east coast is still pretty warm if you need to bail on OBX.
Completely off-topic, but I just wanted to let our esteemed blog host know that, based solely on his enthusiastic recommendation, I sought out and obtained some Gingergold apples from the orchard market in Canon City, and yeah, I agree…they are pretty much All That. They threaten to knock the Honeycrisp off the top of my favorites list.
@frosty: According to my sis, who is a horticulturalist, weeds have amazingly strong root systems.
@Barbara: Strong roots. Because of course they do. They wouldn’t be weeds if they were easy to kill.
@Cheryl Rofer: That’s not good, but I have to say the nws from Raleigh preparedness list
is interesting. https://twitter.com/NWSGSP/status/1038789177226276864
Who new that Chips Ahoy cookies would be on the list.
@Cheryl Rofer: Category 4 in the Outer Banks is devastating. Hugo was really fast moving and compact, which is what made it less awful than it could have been.
@Barbara: If I we’re Cole I’d be cashin that trip insurance and head for the gulf.
@Gvg: I have also noticed that the fence seems to be keeping the water inside the yard.
Not that I should talk. Parts of our front yard are beginning to resemble Cole’s backyard.
@frosty: Boiling water does, but that doesn’t help you.
Really?!? Not so sure. James Conner looked fine to me. With a drier ball and field, he may have had a much bigger day. I’m a huge fan.
@Barbara: The last one that hit there drained the Pamlico Sound and then overfilled it.
@Gvg: drain pipes going FROM the neighbors backyards INTO John’s yard might be the problem.?
This is from The Oregon Inlet Idiots facebook.
Have you considered unsealing the bottom of the fence so that the water doesn’t pile up inside the yard? I’m looking to the left and the right, and they look perfectly fine. Or, you could simply pour concrete and go with a giant swimming pool. You could charge admission to cover costs?
The willow is too close to the water.
Hurricane Irene Update 8-31-11 Outer Banks
What’s up with those two treads in the deck that appear unstained? They’re driving me crazy!
@Miss Bianca: Haven’t encountered Gingergold here in the PNW but we did a taste test of 8 different new varieties with friends over Lanor Day. Tops was a green apple called Lemonade followed by Rave.
Since this is an open thread, Collins is hedging about Kavanaugh, because if he lied that would bother her. I have been unable to link to the press herald article though. So maybe she’ll say he didn’t mean it?
@sukabi: It is an interesting contrast, the neighbor’s yard and driveway v. Cole’s. It does seem to indicate that it isn’t just how much rain has fallen, it is a drainage issue, and it is fixable. Maybe John needs s consultation with a landscaper or landscape architect.
@Ruviana: Moi, aussi. Why are brand new boards being installed in a brand new deck? Inquiring minds want to know.
Also too, why ain’t there show already on the road?
@Barbara: My late sister and her late husband lived in the Isle of Palms when Hugo hit. (unrelated to them both having passed)
@Cheryl Rofer: Yikes.
Doesn’t he have to wait for the rental folks to tell him he can’t come?
@HinTN: Depends on the policy I think and it wouldn’t be the rental people it would be the gubbmint.
@Dan B: might depend on grocery store…in sw washington ginger holds started showing up last year…fresh crop just hit a couple of the stores I shop at.
Popcorn sometimes bothers my teeth but I keep eating it. I suspect Collins will get over it and vote for him anyway. Prove me wrong, senator!
I am curious why Cole is not French Draining the water into the empty green space behind his property?
Also too. Honeycrisp is the superior apple. Period.
IIRC, Hazel in 1954 was also category 4 at the time of U.S. landfall.
I’m just glad that once again we can all see the fact that Ben Wittes is dumb. He is not smart. He’s not someone to be putting any stock in his analysis. Because he is quite dumb.
We’re holding our breath this week because we’re due to arrive at Holden Beach next Saturday and they’re just west of what looks like landfall at Cape Fear.
@Corner Stone: I wondered what a French drain was; sorry I asked:
@Miss Bianca: Haven’t encountered Gingergold here in the PNW but we did a taste test of 8 different new varieties with friends over Lanor Day. Tops was a green apple called Lemonade followed by Rave. @sukabi: Great news! I’ll look at several stores.
@HinTN: You insured?
That willow looks very happy. After we lose the Great Trade Wars and the Warmarts are all gone, John will have pain medicine from the bark and anti-inflammatory leaves to barter. Sitting on his porch in a homemade twig chair weaving baskets, selling fishing nets and brooms. Charcoal pencils. Theoretically.
@JPL: i want to know why all the focus is on these 2 unreliable — when we should be working on Flake and Corker to actually stand for something on their way out.
Am not a big nor a regular eater of apples but when the rare urge to buy one or two does show up have found Jazz to be quite tasty.
Jim, Foolish Literalist
@JPL: I’ll believe it when I see it, I still think she’s loyal to McConnell, but a group collecting pledges to go to her opponent has over 500K, and word’s gotten out that her staff isn’t recording anti-Kavanagh calls.
@trollhattan: you just gotta call Roto-Router when that happens.
@Corner Stone: Our Labor Day taste test included Honeycrisp. It did not come out on top. Fifth place after Lemonade and Rave came out on top. A couple others were also better. Rave is the most lkke Honeycrisp.
@WaterGirl: Agreed. Flake may need to actually keep working somewhere after the Senate (not sure of his wealth as it looks like a few million dollars). But Corker is a very wealthy man. He has FU money and can do whatever he feels is right. That means if he votes for Kavvy then it’s because he wants to.
Sounds like her constituents are letting her know their opinions. Keep it up and you might change her mind!
@raven: No, we’ve never bought or needed it in all our years of going there (and other beach places). This may be the one that bites us.
Jim, Foolish Literalist
Collins is said to have $1.2 million in cash for 2020
@HinTN: I’ve bought it for our OBX trips, we rent from friends on 30a and they’ve let us off the hook twice for weather.
@WaterGirl: I’m calling Corker but my expectation that he’s got a shred of decency left in him is indistinguishable from zero.
Jim, Foolish Literalist
@WaterGirl: Collins and Murkowski both pay lip service to choice. Heller might be a worthwhile target, but Flake is a hard-core Mormon conservative
@Corner Stone: And I presume you are basing this assertion on experience? That is, you’ve actually tasted a Gingergold, right? ; )
Third day here as well. Rain was supposed to end here by 10 am….instead it just sorta shifted to this wind-driven mist that gets inside everything, including gore-tex. Only upsides are that fall is definitely on the way and there should be lots of autumn color.
Five inches so far….
@Corner Stone: Bob is still an ambitious man.
We’ve seen this movie innumerable times before.
Collins always hedges, then when the time comes tramples the hedges down in the rush to vote aye.
If past practice is any guide (and it is) she’ll mumble something about having “received assurances” as a justification. Assurances emptier than Mother Hubbard’s cupboard.
30A is sweet. Haven’t been to Grayton Beach in a long long time. I imagine it’s grown a lot.
@JPL: Press Herald link to piece on Collins. See also:
Well, I live on Edisto Island, one block from the beach. I’m starting to freak out a little. Edisto is just south of Charleston–where Hugo hit (oddly enough on the day my oldest was born, though fortunately we lived in Maryland at the time). This is our 3rd year here as permanent residents, and we’re looking at our 3rd hurricane in a row (Matthew, Irma, now Florence).
Where’s the “BUT HER E-MAILS” sign?
Ginger Gold apples have been my favorite for years. They show up around July and the season lasts for about a month. It’s a sad day when they start turning mushy.
Around here, the Honeycrisp harvest is in trouble (weather), and orchards are canceling their Pick Your Own days.
@Miss Bianca: If one has kissed the hem of the Goddess Aphrodite need one spoil their existence worshiping any others?
But yes. My son and I are avid consumers of the apple clan, if not fresh off the tree. As all right thinking Americans, he concurs, and we remain a Honeycrisp household. When they are out of season we make do with the lesser offerings.
I think you’re gonna need a bigger boat
Definitive frightener re certain trees: Algernon Blackwood’s The Willows. Read it when I was about 10…never forgotten. Truly creepy. And the Cole backyard is definitely exhibiting a The Willows-y vibe….
Hoping one more mug of coffee will provide motivation to go outside and get a full property mowing out of the way. Must be done ahead of the arrival of Olivia.
@HinTN: He’s also *really* tiny. I mean, small in stature.
“So, BillinGlendale, Corker and Tom Cruise go into a bar in a trenchcoat…”
And that’s if you get through. I get nothing but voicemail options and most of the time the voicemail is full.
Collins doesn’t want to hear from us.
Looking at the picture and wondering if there is any gap under the fence and which way does the yard slope. Sumthin’ ain’t right. /retired landscaper
Grand Designs – Buckinghamshire https://www.netflix.com/watch/80160920?trackId=13752289&tctx=0%2C6%2C536db9d4-b385-4d07-a3e4-c7d756eeaea7-59488538%2C%2C
If you haven’t watched, it’s worth some time. British people try to manage their own house builds in unusual places, with unusual materials, and nary a clue. This episode is about a couple that decide to build a house on the Thames, on an island with no road access. Because the river floods often, they decide to build an amphibious house that floats in a hole they dig in the ground.
@chris: I used to have trouble keeping track of the Jennifers on this site. Then the “cat” related nyms. Now it’s either “Eric”‘s or “Chris”‘s. Are you the one in Newfie?
Ew! Ick! Voters!
We had a similar problem on a smaller scale where water would pond between our house and the neighbors driveway.
We rented a ditch witch and dug out a trench to a point well beyond the area that flooded. Put in cloth, gravel and drainage tubes. It solved our problem.
Wonder if something similar to our French Drain could solve your problem.
@chris: The swimming pool used to be next to the deck..
@Corner Stone: Nova Scotia.
@Another Scott: I remember that! The willow works!
That pic also looks like the bottom of the fence is blocked. If so, no drainage and the fence will rot quickly.
@debbie: Where are you located? Here in CO, the Gingers are still mighty crisp!
Ohio. I buy them from a local farmer. They stopped selling them just before Labor Day and my supply is practically gone. ?
No rain in San Diego since, I think, March. We have buckets in showers to collect water for plants, likewise bucket in kitchen to collect water as it heats up for dishes. Most restaurants don’t serve water unless it’s requested.
@NotMax: One of my clearest childhood memories is of Hazel – watching the limbs on the huge willows that surrounded the big dark brown old creepy house across the street (where the scary old widow lived who owned most all the land across the street) whipping their leaves wildly back & forth in the gales through the near-dark of midafternoon.
@debbie: I wonder if relative humidity has anything to do with apple condition…I notice that the Macintoshes (another fave rave of mine) that we get from the grocery store – and which are presumably trucked in from quite a ways away – appear to be far mushier in texture than the ones grown locally.
@Miss Bianca: They’re just not the same since Steve Jobs died.
Share some of your rain, you selfish b*stard
— Sincerely, California
TS (the original)
@Jim, Foolish Literalist:
Crowdpac for her opponent is currently at $850K – if she waits long enough to vote yes there will be more than $1.2m
@?BillinGlendaleCA: Ach, ach, ach!
For those many who are saying John just needs better drainage, better slope, maybe a french drain, while all that may be true, I am sitting on the other side of WV where I have lived for 35 years and the ground is more saturated than I have ever before seen. water is pooling in ways I have only seen twice in a quarter century, and all the usual drainage that has always worked just can’t keep up. One of the two times this happened before was this May, and I had planned to rent a backhoe to work on the drainage when we dried out, and we never dried out. And in a week Florence may be here. This is nuts.
On the other hand, you’ll never have a problem figuring which Amir Khalid is comenting. I recommend that all jackals pick an exotic foreign-sounding nym.
@Amir Khalid: One could also go with Latin.
Perfect September day in the Willamette Valley. Had a great swim in the river. Probably the last time this year.
@wvng: Joys of climate change. Southwest Nova Scotia (where it used to rain every few days) is working on its second drought in as many years. Lawns are brown and 200 year old wells are going dry. I’m afraid to look.
@TS (the original): btw, do we have any inkling of exactly who the opponent to Collins might be, who’d be receiving this windfall? Has any candidate declared her/himself?
What Have The Romans Ever Done for Us?
@Corner Stone: I like Stayman/Winesap and Cortland just as well. Maybe more if I’m being honest.
@Omnes Omnibus: Or exotic fictional characters. With or without Latin monikers.
I think you may be right. I can’t wait to see how expensive they’ll be in a month or two.
What Have The Romans Ever Done for Us?
@Kyle: we’d love to send you half of what we’ve had the past two months if we could. Signed, the entire Mid-Atlantic.
@Amir Khalid: Your name is memorable, but I won’t call it exotic. I have heard it before.
@schrodingers_cat: It is pretty exotic in much of the US.
Gin & Tonic
@What Have The Romans Ever Done for Us?: The Macoun is the best apple. This is fact.
@HinTN: It’s grown out near 30a but still funky right in town. The rest of 30a you wouldn’t recognize.
@chris: yes, climate change. We saw landslides in May from saturated ground. Rocky mountainsides.
For Florence, are there other possible paths in the current predictions? (Not at NOAA is all I know.) Is it too early for models to diverge?
Is all still normal with the weather tools, or has the Republican Revolutionary Push for Failure reduced funding for the runs,
restricted data collection‘simplified’ the report form?
(Next year Jared’s Office of Kushner Excellent Innovation expects to roll out a modernized ouija board system. )
@Gin & Tonic: Cortland and Macoun are my favorites, along with Nittany (which I believe is a cross between York and
a Delicious varietal).
@Omnes Omnibus: I was just speaking for myself not the entire country.
@schrodingers_cat: Ferraris are exotic cars, yet I have seen them.
@Corner Stone: I don’t think you have confused me with any other “cat” so far. And agreed about Wittes, and the other Lawfare blogger, Susan Hennessy is no better.
@Gin & Tonic: Macoun à son goût.
@Omnes Omnibus: I am surprised you’re still coherent.
@Corner Stone: I am an optimist.
@Ruviana: Think they’re the ones replaced after John stepped through the original boards in the days after buying the place.
@Gvg: I observed and thought the same thing. Maybe a variation on a French drain? Where exactly is John’s beach vacation supposed to be and when? I missed out on all that, although apparently it must be in the Carolina’s somewhere.
Have you ever had Empire apples? Undertones of cinnamon.
@Omnes Omnibus: I speak Hindi and Amir is not foreign sounding to my ears. Amir means rich in Hindi. Amir is not an uncommon Muslim name in India. Amir Khusro was a famous Indian poet and there is Aamir Khan.
@EBT: hope springs infernal
@Corner Stone: Macon (georgia) is going to get wet?
@schrodingers_cat: My point is that not exotic to you does not mean not exotic for the majority of the US. And I think you know that.
@Jim, Foolish Literalist: Heller knows that his only hope of remaining in office is keeping Trump’s base frothing at the mouth over him. Being a moderate is not particularly part of his “brand” beyond being from a purple state (does he even have a brand?), so he has nothing really to gain by pretending to have a moderate gene now, when the stakes are so high.
Collins and Murkowski are different. They won office by being officially pro-choice. Collins has been unassailable in the past due to her reputation for “moderation”, as undeserved as it might be. She’s up for reelection in 2020, and a vote to confirm a guy as transparently hackish and hostile to choice as Kavanaugh could really put her seat in jeopardy. Murkowski is currently in the Senate directly due to Democratic voters. Supporting Kavanaugh would trash the coalition which put her in power last time, so there are serious risks to doing that. But she’s not up for reelection until 2022, so maybe she’ll decide it’s worth the risk.
Both Collins and Murkowski, like all Senate Republicans, want to vote yes. If Trump had picked a garden variety hard-right judge, one who could play the normal kabuki and had absolutely no paper trail, Collins and Murkowski could play dumb and possibly get away with it (at least believe they could get away with it). But Trump wanted more than a garden variety Stone Age conservative; he wanted a totally corrupt hack. And as more comes out about how hackish and corrupt Kavanaugh is, the greater the risk for Collins and Murkowski.
I won’t believe they’re voting against him until he’s officially been withdrawn, but those two are definitely the only two who have any real incentive to do so.
@Gin & Tonic: Hmm…
I would have said that about the Winesap. The ones I’ve had were from an orchard in west-central Ohio (near Wapakoneta). It’s apparently an ancient variety in the USA.
Gin & Tonic
@Another Scott: You will note that on that blog you link to, the Macoun is one of only five “3-star” apple varieties. Your Winesap is not one of the five.
@Omnes Omnibus: I did specify that I was only speaking for myself, in an earlier response. Yes, it would be an exotic name to most here, I never disputed that.
@schrodingers_cat: Then what was your point?
@catclub: I wouldn’t be averse to that. After a relatively wet summer we’ve gone bone dry for the last couple of weeks under a blazing sun. Early September weather here has always been my least favorite time of the year. The summer blahs.
@sdhays: Thanks for this. I’ve folks who are so called pro life so my argument to them is that those hearings proved that he’s a liar and no one should want him to get a lifetime appointment on the SC.
@Another Scott: Winesaps are, indeed, an heirloom varietal. I remember falling in love with the name when I was a kid reading some book set on a farm in Iowa, where it was one of the apple varieties grown in the orchard. Remember being thrilled when I finally found some after moving to Colorado! I like them well enough, but don’t love them – that being said, when I get around to blending my own cider, I am definitely going to include them in the mix.
@dww44: Trump’s “lodestar” is always to find the absolute worst people for any given job. Kavanaugh is the Supreme equivalent of the guy he tried to appoint to the Federal Circuit who barely had a law degree, had never been in court, and couldn’t explain what habeas corpus is (or some other similarly basic concept). He is extremely unqualified, even by the low standards of the other Republicans currently on the Court. So of course he was the one Spankee chose.
@Corner Stone: Of the widely available varieties, Honeycrisp and the other newfangled varieties (Snapdragon and Sweetango) are the best. Hands down.
I do love the Rubinette, Orin, and Cox Orange, though. You won’t find those in your grocery unfortunately.
Well shitgibbon is a narcissist deluxe, so he believes that everyone should be like him, the perfect person. One that’s self centered, arrogant, and consistently wrong. And Kav is that bad. Not exactly like shitgibbon of course no one will ever measure down to that level. At least no one in public life, ever again. A boy can dream, right?
@Gin & Tonic: Hey, no fair actually reading the things I cite!!
J R in WV
@Jim, Foolish Literalist:
Wait — I thought those religious people didn’t believe in violating civil criminal law, lying, theft of valuable information (emails) all that immorality — right? Wrong? I dunno, not being churched and all, I don’t believe in lying, stealing, illegal shenanegans like that… but I’m not religions.
Maybe Mormons have different standards?? Like, some lying is OK, even under oath?
If you ever run across them, try Northern Spy for makin’ cider.
Why that above is completely struck through I have no idea.
If you ever run across them, try Northern Spy for makin’ cider.
@Ruckus: Well shitgibbon is a narcissist deluxe
That’s a narcissist in a pickle that comes with fries, mayo and
a small cokeno one knows how much coke, right?
@debbie: Empire apples are the best that I’ve ever tasted. They have a delicious crab apple scent; I have never noticed any cinnamon but maybe here in Quebec we’re too far north.
@PIGL: Late to the thread, it’s probably dead. We grow an apple called Williams Pride that we love. Ripens late August here, though this year they were a bit early and some cooked on the tree it was so hot, but the rest were divine. They have a perfumy scent and are lovely apples. I just used the last of them in an apple crisp.
Stay safe, all you jackals in hurricane zones !
I remember Hurricane Hazel – was quite young then, but ’twas Big Thing – family had gathered at my grandfather’s place, power went off, candles, and his roof blew off – think that happened after I was asleep…
Has gone from 95 high Wednesday to 65 Sunday, me old bones no like.
Apples – I’d put Staymans and Winesaps at top of my list, and a supply of sharp cheddar and peanut butter
Go Iggles !
What Have the Romans Ever Done for Us?
@Gin & Tonic: Oh yes, I forgot about those. They’re delicious too.
What Have the Romans Ever Done for Us?
@opiejeanne: Those are good too.
The Pale Scot
Mulberry trees suck the water up also. And you could always try silk farming
On the bright side, you now have that outside pool that you’ve always wanted.
@What Have the Romans Ever Done for Us?: I’m stunned that anyone else has heard of them. I’ve never seen them grown commercially but maybe they are somewhere. My only grocery store, the stupid Haggens which is really an Albertsons and not as good as before, only carries the usual apples with the addition of Jazz. They just showed up and I’m suspicious that they’ve been in cold storage for the past year.
I’m in Washington. Apples should not cost $4 a pound!
Your yard looked like this last year too. You appear to be the lowest property in your vicinity. You either need a drain that runs to a nearby creek or you need to raise your property a few feet higher. You won’t get there with French Drains. Those are meant to handle rain surges to accelerate movement to a lower place and prevent scouring and overcome impermeable surface. You just have rain rain rain. You can check your soil permeability but in your part of the country it is likely OK. I realize you have put in hard work on the current landscaping, but this will continue happening and likely get worse as our new normal moves to harder rainfall in your area. How high is your foundation from your crawlspace planks? Are you still dry under your home?