— Miss T (@TaMarasKitchen) September 25, 2018
I hate these people. If you’re on Twitter, feel free to go express your outrage. (If that tweet disappears, I have a screenshot)
UPDATE: I’ve added my tweet with the screenshot
My morning started on a frustrating note. At 7 am I received a text from my niece/goddaughter. She’s not quite 12. She received a “code violation” this morning and to quote her “had to take time out of learning to change my clothes.” She knows the score.
For the last three years, she and I have had the tradition of going back-to-school shopping together. Fewer tears when you’re doing it with Auntie. If you’re a mom, you understand. We’ve gone from shopping in the kiddie section of Target and Old Navy, to the Juniors section. And with those changes, the conversation changes. To code violations.
Seriously, before she was 11 years old, she was being told she couldn’t wear things because they would distract the boys. Luckily, she has me, her mom and my brother, who know bullshit when we hear it. So her response is a sassy, “oh, look, do my shoulders distract the boys? Maybe that’s their problem.” And we put that sweater back and look for another.
She’s promised to call me when she’s free today – she’s a competitive dancer who just tried out for the school play, is in band and choir and is on the honor roll, so free time won’t be easy. But really, what the ever fuck? This is how it starts. This is what our girls are up against.
Okay, rant over. Open thread.
I am more and more convinced that these dress codes are all about teaching boys to abuse and harass girls, and later women.
Think about it. Why don’t we let the girls wear what they want and punish the boys if they tease or touch them. That would be far better than teaching them that girls are responsible for boys bad behavior, and will, in fact, be punished for being girls daring to exist in a world where boys are still the norm.
Note: there can be room for a dress code, but it cannot be one which excludes what is being sold in the stores that year. If you are banning mainstream clothes being sold at Target or Walmart, then you are just taking your anger at the changing world out on the young women in your care.
It also teaches boys that girls don’t have a right to be in the class as human beings. Their inclusion is reliant on correct performance of femininity.
TLDR: Whatever a school punishes girls for, the boys are learning is what the acceptable excuse for getting away abusing and harassing them later.