It’s been a while since we checked in with Floriduh! Man, or at least Floriduh! Man not trying to blow up a couple of dozen people, so let’s see what we’ve got cooking. Er, um…
Police in Florida stumbled upon the strange video of a naked man helping himself to food from a restaurant while investigating a separate burglary at the establishment. ?https://t.co/E32AKmfRwD
— CBS4Local (@CBS4Local) November 13, 2018
Take it away Tampa Bay Times!
ST. PETERSBURG — It started with chicken wings, a beer and a burglar.
It went downhill from there.
A St. Petersburg police officer was investigating a Nov. 6 break-in at The Chattaway restaurant, reviewing surveillance video that shows the burglar devouring a plate of chicken wings and enjoying a beer inside the kitchen. But then the officer stumbled across another incident from the night before.
The video shows a man riding his bike up to the restaurant at 358 22nd Ave S, pedaling around the parking lot for 10 minutes, then slipping in through the back gate. After wandering around for a bit, he opens the door to a shed for storing odds and ends, and removes them one by one.
Then the man gains access to a restaurant bathroom. And exits without his clothes.
He proceeds to sit naked at one of the restaurant’s picnic tables and digs into a meal he brought with him — Maruchan Instant Lunch ramen. The video also shows him playing the bongos, also naked.
“He came in with pants on but he rode off on the bike without pants,” Chattaway server Chad Pearson said. “I’m not sure if he took his pants with him but we didn’t find them. We still don’t know where his pants are.”
He spray-painted a few chairs, the bongos and a pickle jar, but his handiwork was barely noticeable, manager Amanda Kitto said. Everything was put back so neatly, in fact, it was four hours before anyone noticed he had been there.
“We would not have known about the naked guy without the cop finding that video,” Kitto said.
Police identified the man, who is homeless, but did not release his name publicly. Kitto declined to give his name and said the restaurant will not press charges because he caused no harm.
“His goal was to not break in, his goal was to just hang out at The Chattaway.”
What about the first guy?
Police still are trying to catch him.
He enjoyed the plate of chicken wings and some beer, and stole an estimated $500 worth of stuff, including cash tips, a laptop, a tablet, and a grocery bag he filled with beer.
“He made himself at home,” Kitto said. “He spent over an hour just milling around going room to room and eating and drinking while he did it.”
The man also tried unsuccessfully to access the safe using his hands, a pot handle and tongs.
Kitto is confident that even though the two incidents happened back-to-back, they are not connected.
“I used to always joke and say that if you were going to break into The Chattaway to make sure to grab a beer. And it finally happened.”
https://getyarn.io/yarn-clip/2cba7a9f-3ccb-4279-a0d9-6808522ea0c4
Also, given the Real Genius reference, this cannot be unseen!
Who knew @gatewaypundit was Kent from "Real Genius?" #JacobWohl #JacobsMom #MuellerIsComingForYou pic.twitter.com/d3zLl1jsqr
— Afrea Kingmen / podpisano a Ziomek (@TEZNYC) October 31, 2018
Floriduh! Woman, however, also put in a strong showing.
42-year-old Kimberly Gabel cursed out the manager of a Red Lobster before snatching a live lobster from its tank and running out.https://t.co/CFUlJQ669j
— KOLD News 13 (@KOLDNews) November 14, 2018
Once again The Tampa Bay Times has got this story well in hand…
The lobster never saw it coming.
One second it was floating listlessly in a glass tank, vying against endless shrimp, the smell of Cheddar Bay Biscuits hanging hauntingly in the air. Then, the Pinellas County Sheriff’s Office said, an apparently intoxicated St. Petersburg woman snatched the lobster from its crustaceous purgatory and ran.
The lobster was never seen again.
Kimberly Gabel was arrested Saturday on charges of disorderly intoxication and petit theft for causing a disturbance in the Red Lobster at 6151 34th St N . The restaurant had barely been open two hours.
It was just after 1:15 p.m., deputies said, when a manager at the restaurant asked Gabel to leave. The manager said she was disturbing customers and shouted obscenities as she made her way to the door. Before she could leave, though, the 42-year-old woman reached into the oft-familiar entryway lobster tank, grabbed a live lobster and bolted.
Deputies said they caught up with Gabel a “short distance later.” They said she smelled of alcohol and slurred her words as she continued cursing, telling deputies she didn’t know what she did with the lobster because she was “blacked out drunk” and that she “did not care because she did not do anything wrong.”
Deputies described Gabel as a homeless woman. According to Pinellas County Jail records, she has been arrested numerous times for charges ranging from public intoxication to multiple counts of burglary and theft. She is currently awaiting trial in Pinellas County Jail.
Stay hungry!
Open thread!
A Ghost To Most
All this wierdity, plus heat, humidity, bigots, and bugs, all played out on a pool table with swamps for pockets.
What’s not to like?
Adam L Silverman
@A Ghost To Most: The heat, humidity, bigots, and bugs. Other than that it’s paradise.
p.a.
After eating, he mopped naked, was hear to mutter “where’s the goddamned mustard”, then decided to give up drinking.
p.a.
What happened to my comment? Misspelled email? Why is my iPad keyboard so clunky on only this website?
Never mind.??
debbie
Two nice ledes!
Le Comte de Monte Cristo, fka Edmund Dantes
Along similar amusing lines, in Elizabethtown, KY (about 45 min south of Louisville), proprietors of a car dealer took umbrage at being the recipients of Bags of Dicks, dick cards, jizz confetti, etc.
They were so upset, they filed a lawsuit this week.
spectacular pleading referencing dick-modeled confections, dick confetti, spring loaded bags of jizz, etc.
The courtroom giggles are going to be spectacular as the plaintiff utters their butthurt.
TaMara (HFG)
Ewww
A Ghost To Most
@Adam L Silverman: Paradise isn’t flat, at least not in my timeline.
Mary G
Cool thread and images:
My favorite:
lamh36
Ya’ll…I’ve been sitting here watching the old BBC Documentary about the band Queen on YouTube for the past 30 minutes, and I’m gonna continue watching the remaining 90minutes of it…LOL.
At the very least, I’m sitting here and realizing just how well Remi Malek did with his stage movements as Freddie Mercury. If there was limits to the physicality (seeing old footage, Mercury’s teeth were pretty big, but not as perectly formed as the ones Malek wore), the stage performance, presence and movement, Malek did pretty darn good.
Queen BBc documentary https://youtu.be/CoM0vd4cWiY via @YouTube
A Ghost To Most
crooks&liars
lamh36
@lamh36: It’s crazy to me that MTV banned the video for Queen’s “I Want To Break Free”…cause the band was dressed in drag.
It’s to interesting how times have changed so much…that a video like that wouldn’t even make a blip on the radar.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f4Mc-NYPHaQ
Adam L Silverman
@Le Comte de Monte Cristo, fka Edmund Dantes: Well isn’t that special…
Dr. Ronnie James, D.O.
“…arrested Saturday on charges of disorderly intoxication and petit theft”
… Sacre Bleu!
Adam L Silverman
@p.a.: I freed it.
guachi
Cisneros is now only 122 votes behind Kim in CA-39. Gained 344 votes today. I thought he’d pass him today. Maybe tomorrow.
On the other hand, the Utah seat is moving in the opposite direction.
The Dangerman
And i just made separate orders from Amazon for a chicken and an egg,
I’ll let you know.
Le Comte de Monte Cristo, fka Edmund Dantes
Along similar amusing lines, in Elizabethtown, KY (about 45 min south of Louisville), proprietors of a car dealer took umbrage at being the recipients of Bags of D!cks, d!ck cards, j!zz confetti, etc.
They were so upset, they filed a lawsuit this week.
The most spectacular pleading ever written
Adam L Silverman
@TaMara (HFG): If you’re not going to post food threads, someone has to fill the vacuum…
Adam L Silverman
@A Ghost To Most: Mine either. Nor hot, nor humid. Nor bug infested.
rikyrah
These? Are?Beto’s?Coattails?
Nicholas Warren (@NLVWarren) Tweeted:
The blue wave broke hard in the Texas Courts of Appeals last week, where Dems flipped 24 judgeships. In four courts, they went from *zero* seats to a majority.
https://t.co/EnzCyB7qPp https://twitter.com/NLVWarren/status/1062718271982592005?s=17
Adam L Silverman
@lamh36:
As someone who lived in Scotland for 3 years, I can attest that British dentistry leaves much to be desired.
A Ghost To Most
@Adam L Silverman: I hope you end up where you want to be. It took living in 8 states, both coasts plus Gulf coast and Canadian border, but I know this is the place.
jeffreyw
@Adam L Silverman:
‘ere, ‘ave a bite, mate.
imonlylurking
I just did 25 postcards for Mike Espy. I hadn’t signed up for Postcard Patriots because I didn’t know what to write, but they will give you suggestions. I’ve got a nice spiel if anybody wants to use it. It’s really easy!
NotMax
Lobster immediately whisked to the nearest Saudi consulate.
(Too soon?)
Adam L Silverman
@A Ghost To Most: I was willing to go back to SOCOM over the summer, despite that not being my favorite place to work (that is one ate up headquarters!). And Florida is not my favorite place to live. Both of those contracts went poof. The company that recruited me still wants me, and we’re in touch, but until they have a funded line to plug me into…
cthulhu
@rikyrah:
If every statewide losing Dem can manage gains like this, we won’t keep losing statewide for long…
?BillinGlendaleCA
@Le Comte de Monte Cristo, fka Edmund Dantes: I doubt it will rival Fox v. Franken.
?BillinGlendaleCA
@guachi:
Young Kim is a woman.
A Ghost To Most
@Adam L Silverman: I guess your specialties limit your options. Working in IT afforded me choices. Still, it really screwed with my brain in ways I’m still recovering from. Your job must be stressful in a completely different way. I envy your people skills.
JaySinWA
Rick WIlson confessed to being the Naked guy, that explains why he got top billing over the real thief. The PR guy grabs the glory.// https://twitter.com/TheRickWilson/status/1062533199048425472
Adam L Silverman
@A Ghost To Most: What limits my options is I’ve either been a GS15 or a contractor, with supervisory, pay graded equivalent to a GS15. That makes it very hard to get a civil service position, even if there wasn’t a sequester, as no one brings in a GS15 that they don’t know and it makes it very hard to get a contractor position because of what the sequester has done to the contracts.
?BillinGlendaleCA
@JaySinWA: Did he find the mustard?
JaySinWA
@?BillinGlendaleCA: Wasn’t asked, didn’t tell.
NotMax
@Adam L. Silverman
Balloon Juice opens all doors.
Or none. I forget which.
;)
A Ghost To Most
@Adam L Silverman: GS-15, no wonder. Sorry everything is fucked up. I will hate the motherfucking GOP until I die. I left working for DOD in 2009 (Joint Medical Asset Repository at Detrick) when we moved out here. Do not miss working down the street from USAMRIID (sp?).
Adam L Silverman
@NotMax: It worked out well for Anderson and, perhaps, ABL. Of course they also have solid twitter/social media presences and I don’t. That said, it hasn’t done anything for me.
different-church-lady
Seen at Lawyers, Guns and Money:
Mike in NC
@A Ghost To Most: Jimmy Kimmel recently spoofed those horrible “Trumpy Bear” toy ads (made in China, of course). He shows the hidden compartment has more than the flag blanket, but also a photo of Putin, half a cheeseburger, a bucket of KFC, and a fully loaded assault rifle.
A Ghost To Most
@NotMax: I was told there would be no doors.
Adam L Silverman
@A Ghost To Most: It is what it is. I can only do what I’m doing – consulting to survive and working all my contacts to get back on a full time equivalent.
A Ghost To Most
@Mike in NC: What, no bronzer?
Baud
@different-church-lady:
From Reddit
Steeplejack
@Le Comte de Monte Cristo, fka Edmund Dantes:
What did the car dealer do to deserve this plague? Don’t get me wrong, I’m sure they deserved it, but it must have been something heinous to get that reaction.
psycholinguist
Two things I haven’t seen discussed this evening.
1 – Flake apparently grew a pair on his way out the door. He went on the senate floor and said no more judges until legislation to protect Muller. He should get rewarded for good behavior.
2 – what the hell happened to Giuliani? Trump have him chained in the basement or something?
NotMax
FYI.
Litlebritdifrnt
@Adam L Silverman: @?BillinGlendaleCA: @?BillinGlendaleCA: Anyone born in England after the 1960s has pretty good teeth. The Scots however are a breed unto their own. I have to say though having spent 26 years in NC, USA I have never seen so many toothless or nearly toothless individuals in my life as I did there. There is a huge difference between not going to the dentist cause you don’t want to to not going because you can’t afford to.
Adam L Silverman
@psycholinguist: He’s been bouncing around eastern Europe and appearing with various Putin aligned oligarchs.
Adam L Silverman
@NotMax: What did TaMara know and when did she know it?
Adam L Silverman
Speaking of stupid members of my tribe…
different-church-lady
@Adam L Silverman: Guns don’t kill people, sharks with guns kill… no, wait…
opiejeanne
@lamh36: It’s odd that the cross-dressin Monty Python had been around for quite a while before that video dropped in 1984.
chris
This is wonderful.
NotMax
Paging Mr. Silverman…
US Could Lose War Against Russia Or China, Warns Panel
Color me skeptical, sounds more like allocation and strategic program problems, not a monetary one.
JaySinWA
@Adam L Silverman: He must have misheard sharp shooter as shark shooter.
Adam L Silverman
@Litlebritdifrnt: I know a lot of folks from England born after 1960 with dental issues.
Adam L Silverman
@different-church-lady: Unless you’ve got the right gun and it is outfitted with maritime spring cups so it can function/fire under water, you and your gun are going to get eaten.
NotMax
A kilo is a kilo is….
Perhaps the Grand K can be renamed the Pretty Good K.
different-church-lady
@Adam L Silverman: Well sure, but try telling that to the shark!
Adam L Silverman
@NotMax: From May 2017:
https://balloon-juice.com/2017/05/09/we-are-not-escalating-operation-freedoms-sentinel-or-much-of-anything-else-despite-the-clickbait-headlines/
From May 2018:
https://balloon-juice.com/2018/05/07/war-with-iran-a-campaign-of-catastrophe/
Adam L Silverman
@JaySinWA: I don’t think a Sharp’s rifle will fire under water.
Chetan Murthy
@Adam L Silverman: The British Dental Association!
https://youtu.be/TA4H_v_g6rg?t=177
Adam L Silverman
@Chetan Murthy: Pretty much.
opiejeanne
@NotMax: Well, that’s not very helpful. I have two turkeys in my freezer right now, one for Thanksgiving and one for a dinner later, probably January. I’d like to know if one of them is going to kill us.
I know how to handle foods safely and know how to cook it properly.
Mary G
Good news about some of the mountain lions in the Woolsey fire, but four bobcats whose entire habitat burned are MIA.
jl
Saw a tweet someplace, maybe in a comment on this here blog, that says there is evidence that Wohl framed Avenatti on the domestic abuse charge?
That true?
The Avenatti story deserves a front post explainer, regardless of what happened. And if Wohl framed him, that seems a none too bright thing to do, whether the law charges him or not.
Edit: I did hear a news report that the charge was not about his extranged wife, but some supposed girlfriend. That made me wonder, then saw a tweet someplace,
Adam L Silverman
@jl: I posted it in the previous thread.
jl
@Adam L Silverman: Thanks. I’ll go look.
Adam L Silverman
@jl: Here you go:
Yarrow
@Adam L Silverman: I don’t understand this. Did Wohl pay someone to accuse him of abusing them or something? Didn’t the LAPD say they booked him? Seems like if they showed up and there was nothing happening they wouldn’t have done that.
eclare
@chris: What a soothing video
NotMax
@opiejeanne
A favorite grocery store turkey scene.
Ought to be cued up to where the scene starts. If not, it runs from ~18:10 to ~22:05.
Platonailedit
That’ll be fifth flip?
Still too many rethugs for a deep blue state. Traitors nunes, mccarthy and mcclintock seem well entrenched.
joel hanes
@psycholinguist:
[Flake] went on the senate floor and said
Words are cheap.
Let’s see how he acts when Mitch wants more judges confirmed.
I expect Flake to fold.
MisterForkbeard
@Adam L Silverman: I think the current situation for Avenatti is:
* He WAS arrested and held at $50k bail for felony domestic violence.
* The initial reports of it being his ex-wife are completely unfounded. His ex says no, and that he never displayed anything like that while they were married.
* There’s no indication of whether this was a complete set up or he was accused of hitting his girlfriend or something.
That’s all I’ve got.
lamh36
@opiejeanne: Right…the documentary I was watching, touched on the fact that the video had an “English” sensibility and humour that TPTB at MTV and middle America coudn’t quite get. And I know bout Monty Python, but I think folks over-estimate how significant of an impact things they may love and find iconic have on the mainstream pop culture zeitgeist.
Someone I saw somewhere made the point that Freddie Mercury is not as well known as say his contemporaries, like Elton John, Bowie, I guess even MJ…are today. And folks jumped down her throat, but I actually understood what she was saying. Sure you have hardcore classic rock fans, who knew Queen even before Wayne’s World, but you also have a generation of folks who only know of Bohemian Rhapsody BECAUSE of Wayne’s World.
Course so much of Queen’s music has been used in film, tv and commercials and such, that of course they know more of Queen’s music than they realize, but that doesn’t mean they KNOW they be able to tell you who Freddie Mercury was, let alone the name of band.
All that to say, I can certainly see the TPTB from the 80s being prudish enough to ban the video (I mean let’s be frank, MTV didn’t even play any video from musicians of color, until MJ revolutionized the music video genre w/Thriller)
Yarrow
@chris: That’s wonderful. So soothing.
opiejeanne
@lamh36: Oh, Duh! I was thinking British tv aven though I knew it was MTV. Total brain fart.
I didn’t realize that MTV never played videos by PoC before Thriller. I thought MC Hammer and a group with an Asian member came before then but I’ll take your word for it. .
lamh36
@opiejeanne:
How MTV Handled Accusations of Racism and Became More Inclusive
lamh36
@opiejeanne: Also too MC Hammer was late 80’s (’88 to be exact) early 90s. “Billie Jean” was in ’84
Luciamia
The lobster is still at large and is considered delicious.
NotMax
@Luciamia
May be suffering an inferiority complex after encountering Florida cockroaches.
Mnemosyne
@lamh36:
Sadly, IMO it’s because Mercury died young of AIDS when it was still pretty stigmatized. People didn’t want to talk about him because he died of “that” disease.
Yarrow
She’s awful:
I’ve never trusted her. That whole “Lean In” crap just seemed so oblivious and entitled to me. And she lies like she breathes. Her whole job seems to be to put a nicer face on the crap Facebook does because Zuck is so bad at it. Traitors.
Jay
@different-church-lady:
What, no frikken Lazers?
Yarrow
Oooh…missed this earlier:
Viva BrisVegas
@lamh36:
“not as well known in the US”, should be inserted in there somewhere.
In the English speaking world outside of the US, Queen loomed just as large as their contemporaries.
?BillinGlendaleCA
@Litlebritdifrnt: Huh?
TS (the original)
@joel hanes:
They don’t need his vote to get through – and come January his vote is irrelevant
NotMax
The depopulation of Balloon Juice After Dark continues apace.
:(
Viva BrisVegas
@TS (the original):
All that has to happen is for Pence to turn up.
Unless Collins is inflicted with a sudden bout of conscience.
?BillinGlendaleCA
@Viva BrisVegas: Queen was quite well known in the US in the mid to late 70’s.
trollhattan
Will link to tonight’s Camp Fire Incident report. Says it all.
?BillinGlendaleCA
@trollhattan: Gawd, that’s awful but it looks like they’re starting to get a handle on it.
Yutsano
@TS (the original): And they all have to get re-nominated. End of session = starting all over. And no McGahn to back them up this time. Have to see who gets Flake’s seat on Judiciary.
Amir Khalid
@Mnemosyne:
Queen first made their mark with their 1974 album Sheer Heart Attack, but they got big all over the world with the next one, A Night At The Opera — the album with Bohemian Rhapsody. It’s hard to imagine them, or Freddie, being unknown to anyone who followed the pop culture of the 1970s.
?BillinGlendaleCA
Shhhh, the jackals are sleeping.
Martin
@Platonailedit: Yeah, CA-45 is the 5th. Katie went up by 4,000 votes tonight and that’s almost certain to climb. I expect she’ll finish 2-3% ahead.
I’m still expecting CA-39 to come in for Dems. There’s still a lot of ballots to count and they’re steadily coming in for Dems. Not only will we have picked up 4 House seats in OC, all 7 seats that touch Orange County will be blue. We’ve also flipped another state assembly seat – my district 74. This district has never been represented by a Democrat at the federal or state level, and now we have both.
I have to also say that Dems turned out like a fucking army here. I never had a Dem canvasser before, and we had canvassers for both the House and Assembly races. I canvassed as well. Dems put money in Orange County races they’ve never touched before and I’m really proud we’ve come through.
MomSense
We’ve got a bit of the Florida vote madness up here in Maine. Poliquin is suing to try and block Maine’s ranked choice voting law. The margin between Poliquin and Golden was so small that it triggered going to the ranked choice votes. Even though Golden is too conservative and gun happy for me, I am really hoping he gets the win.
Martin
@MomSense: Poliquin is going to lose that suit quite badly. You can’t claim that the rules that were clearly pointed out long before the election started are somehow unfair now that the election has ended. Any rational judge is going to look at that suit as bullshit.
The time to litigate the rules of the election is prior to the election, not once you find yourself at a disadvantage of the rules.
But this is more or less par for the course for Republicans.
Fair Economist
@lamh36:
Of course he isn’t as well known. Mercury has been dead over 30 years so he hasn’t been in the news. Bowie was active to the mid-aughts, MJ to 2009, and Elton John is still active. Pop culture, with rare exceptions, is very ephemeral, and even the most famous stuff goes poof pretty fast. Queen’s music is still pretty well known to those that listen to 70’s music, but that’s on oldies stations now.
Doug R
Humble brag-the actress who played Jordan in Real Genius Michele Meyrink was in the same graduating class as me. We were both in our high school play Music Man. She played Zaneta Shin, I had a few bit townsfolk parts.
John Revolta
@Doug R: Ye Gods!
Mandalay
@Litlebritdifrnt:
I find this pretty amazing, and may help explain their teeth issues:
Those in the media in Britain seem to have the same dazzling white perfect teeth as their counterparts here, but many British politicians still don’t seem to give a shit. Now be honest: would you want to put your tongue in Theresa May’s mouth? It looks like she sets aside three minutes every month to brush her teeth whether they need it or not.
Atticus Dogsbody
oft-familiar? Was it sometimes not familiar?
Also, SPRING LOADED JIZZ BOMB was my nickname in high school.
Frankensteinbeck
@Fair Economist:
Just ask John Banvard.
Sloane Ranger
Brexit – apparently Dominick Raab has just resigned as Brexit Secretary. I am sick to death of these gutless wonders. They did this after Chequers as well.They let the PM go out and say there is Cabinet agreement and then resign in high dudgeon the next day.
If you don’t like the deal you should resign on the spot. Actually as Brexit Secretary, he was responsible for negotiating the deal so he should have resigned before.
Amir Khalid
@Sloane Ranger:
Theresa May has struck me as a shockingly inept PM and party leader on Brexit. She seems oblivious to the damage it is already doing to Britain. Her Cabinet doesn’t seem any more unified on this issue than the general public.
Platonailedit
May’s end may be near. As usual, the men left the woman holding the baby in the end. Fucking cowards.
Platonailedit
@Martin: That’s great news for mccain. (Wonder what that useless pos & sexual abuser hackperin is doing now)
Sloane Ranger
@Platonailedit: My thoughts exactly! Gutless wonders, one and all!
danielx
Ordinarily I wouldn’t consider Florida as an abode, but what with having to take my daughter work this am during an ice storm in goddamned November….I could be persuaded.