Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

Pessimism assures that nothing of any importance will change.

These days, even the boring Republicans are nuts.

It is not hopeless, and we are not helpless.

It may be funny to you motherfucker, but it’s not funny to me.

The Supreme Court cannot be allowed to become the ultimate, unaccountable arbiter of everything.

Polls are now a reliable indicator of what corporate Republicans want us to think.

Not loving this new fraud based economy.

Boeing: repeatedly making the case for high speed rail.

JFC, are there no editors left at that goddamn rag?

The gop is a fucking disgrace.

The republican caucus is covering themselves with something, and it is not glory.

The next time the wall street journal editorial board speaks the truth will be the first.

This chaos was totally avoidable.

Oh FFS you might as well trust a 6-year-old with a flamethrower.

Republicans: The threats are dire, but my tickets are non-refundable!

If a good thing happens for a bad reason, it’s still a good thing.

Jesus, Mary, & Joseph how is that election even close?

Republicans firmly believe having an abortion is a very personal, very private decision between a woman and J.D. Vance.

The line between political reporting and fan fiction continues to blur.

Bark louder, little dog.

Sometimes the world just tells you your cat is here.

If rights aren’t universal, they are privilege, not rights.

Quote tweet friends, screenshot enemies.

There are consequences to being an arrogant, sullen prick.

You are here: Home / Open Threads / Open Thread: Failures in Corporate Branding

Open Thread: Failures in Corporate Branding

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(I think the homemade version of this mixture is what my local sub shop uses for its delicious potato salad, but still… ‘Mayomust’ sounds like a translation error!)

Reader Interactions

214Comments

  6. 6.

    Keith P.

    At least they didn’t go with “Mustmayorstadainnaise”….that one has already been done.

  9. 9.

    mrmoshpotato

    Ugh. More of this crap. Reminds me of Smuckers striped peanut butter and jelly in one jar. What’s so hard about mixing the two parts if that’s what you want?

  19. 19.

    Jim, Foolish Literalist

    @mrmoshpotato: Ugh. More of this crap. Reminds me of Smuckers striped peanut butter and jelly in one jar.

    Ugh, indeed. I think it was in a squeeze bottle at one point

  21. 21.

    Jim, Foolish Literalist

    also, Schakowsky 2020

    @ jdawsey1
    At one point, Rep. Jan Schakowsky (D-Ill.), a close Pelosi ally, pleaded with Democrats: “Everyone stop tweeting!”

    @schrodingers_cat: it was a favorite when I was a kid, now I kind of wonder how anyone ever thought of it, and why. Also, fluffernutters. And peanut butter and brown sugar. I’m lucky to have teeth, I guess.

  26. 26.

    Johnny Gentle (famous crooner)

    @Keith P.: I’m glad someone else remembers that bit because it’s all I can think of literally every time this product is mentioned.

  27. 27.

    Jim, Foolish Literalist

    @A Ghost To Most: Correction: Greg Marmalade became a WH aide, and went to prison for Watergate. Even better

    You wonder if he was interrogated in hearings by Senator Blutarski

    it was Niedermeyer who got fragged, there was a call back to that in a Vietnam scene in…. I wanna say the Twilight Zone movie?
    ETA: Guess I should have made a Spoiler Alert, that movie’s only 35 years old

  29. 29.

    Sab

    @schrodingers_cat: Was discussing this very topic with the cashier and the bagger at the grocery last night. I said I don’t like peanut butter with sweets. She was horrified that I don’t like reeces cups. I said my husband likes peanut butter and mayo sandwiches. She thought that sounded delicious. The bagger said it made him gag.

    The guy in line behind us said the whole conversation put him off food.

    Oh yeah. Forgot: cashier’s favorite is peanut butter, syrup and cheese. That just boggles my mind.

  31. 31.

    A Ghost To Most

    @Sab:
    Ilke peanuts and peanut butter, but despise it cooked in anything. The fork marks on pb cookies are appreciated.

  32. 32.

    Aleta

    Does it come from expressing the glands of a rabbity goat-like forest creature? (Not harmed in the process of course.)

  33. 33.

    Jeffro

    Sriracha mayo’s pretty good but I don’t buy it that way – just buy sriracha, buy mayo, and mix a tablespoon of each when needed; otherwise, just keep you options open.

    Flexibility – ESPECIALLY condiment flexibility – it’s the key to a good life

  34. 34.

    Gravenstone

    @Shana: peanut butter on well buttered toast? Why yes, thank you! Good stuff, Maynard. Of course, I also like peanut butter and mayo sandwiches. Except I put lettuce on mine. Maybe it’s just an Ohio thing.

  35. 35.

    Jim, Foolish Literalist

    @Aleta: Does it come from expressing the glands of a rabbity goat-like forest creature?

    Rabbity goat-like…? Reince Priebus? I don’t want anything from his glands

  36. 36.

    Sab

    @Shana: I had two last night. They were both delicious. It’s why I take statins, so I can eat stuff like that.

  37. 37.

    Anne Laurie

    @Jim, Foolish Literalist:

    I think it was in a squeeze bottle at one point

    Combined pbj in an unbreakable tube actually makes some sense, if you live with small children who want to “help” make their own sammiches.

  38. 38.

    Gloomyjim

    @mrmoshpotato: GooberGrape! I grew up on that stuff. Might have had something to do with the family working for/selling to the processing plant here in OR. Fond memories of only having to open one jar!

  40. 40.

    Anne Laurie

    @schrodingers_cat: Be appalled: I finished off the last of the delicious mango chutney from my latest Indian-restaurant takeout with peanut butter, on an English muffin. Agree that the peanut-and-sweet combo is something that usually has to be introduced to someone at a young age… but then, that’s how I feel about fish sauce on anything, and plenty of people give me the side-eye for politely rejecting *that*…

  42. 42.

    plato

    Scared that very slow moving caravans are going to get past border patrol & show up in your neighborhood?Worried about an invasion of children?Concerned you won't be able to play golf?You might be suffering from National Emergency Anxiety. IT'S DAY 19. Can you feel it?— Ted Lieu (@tedlieu) March 6, 2019

  44. 44.

    BellyCat

    @Gravenstone: Peanut butter and Lettuce sandwiches (gots to be Iceberg) indeed! Also popular in the house when growing up was celery with peanut butter on it. Lays nicely in the groove. Both taste far better than they sound…

    (Why, yes—my mother is from Ohio.)

  51. 51.

    satby

    For the rest of my life when my dieting resolve is weakening, I’m going to be able to refer back to this thread and completely lose my appetite for food. Any food.
    Possibly even living.
    Blech!

  53. 53.

    Another Scott

    In other news, Kim Zetter:

    Kim Zetter Verified account @KimZetter

    House Oversight is investigating Georgia Gov Brian Kemp on voter suppression that occurred in GA under his watch. They want him to hand over communications and docs relating to voter roll purges, polling place closures, voter reg and voting machine probs.

    11:10 AM – 6 Mar 2019

    Good, good.

    (via LOLGOP)

    Cheers,
    Scott.

  56. 56.

    Sab

    @mrmoshpotato: It goes against my own personal prejudice about peanuts with sweets, but it’ s pretty popular around here.

    Cleveland Orchestra included it about 50 years ago in their summer home (Blossom Music Center) picnic cookbook “Bach’s Lunch.” And yes, that was the Girl Scouts recipe.

  59. 59.

    judyinsd

    When younger didn’t care for tomatoes so my mom would make BLTs and replace the T with peanut butter. It was delicious!

  60. 60.

    Amir Khalid

    @The Midnight Lurker:
    Ahem. The word comes from my native land, where it is currently spelled kicap (before 1972, kichap) and means soy sauce. It baffles me that you Americans can confuse tomato sauce with soy sauce. The two look and taste markedly different.

  61. 61.

    bluehill

    This approach on net neutrality is the one I think dems should take on taxes. Just repeal the Trump tax cut. It looks like most people including non-uber-wealthy Trump voters don’t like. Easy to explain and argue.

    On Monday, the Democratic Party leadership informed the public that they would be unveiling their “Save the Net” legislation to re-install net neutrality consumer protections rolled back under Donald Trump. On Wednesday, they have released a three page bill. The Bill, titled “To restore the open internet order of the Federal Communications Commission,” or “Save the Internet Act of 2019,” seeks to simply reinstate those protections rolled back by the Republican FCC. While many of us hoped that the Democrats would release a more robust set of net neutrality laws, more in line with what California recently passed, there is some very smart politicking going on here. As Speaker Pelosi said during the press conference, “A full 86 percent of Americans opposed the Trump assault on net neutrality, including 82 percent of Republicans. That’s hopeful.”

  66. 66.

    Alternative Fax, a hip hop artist from Idaho

    @Sab: Something I’d gleefully force feed to people who’ve crossed me.*

    Oops, you didn’t ask me. I’ll show myself out.

    *Full disclosure: I am not a nice person, and a few people believe I’m dangerous. Oddly, some of them LEOs. Musicians don’t seem to find me scary. Artists and lawyers seem to have mixed views.

  67. 67.

    Mary G

    Chuck Wendig is always pushing a sandwich on Twitter that has mayo, bacon, peanut butter, and pickles. People are always saying eww, then trying it and loving it. I have never felt the call to try it. Scalzi makes burritos with all kinds of horrible-sounding food combinations.

  70. 70.

    Alternative Fax, a hip hop artist from Idaho

    @Amir Khalid: I imagine that a great deal baffles you about us Americans. It sure as hell does me. Though I am clear about the difference between tomato sauce and soy sauce at least.

  71. 71.

    PJ

    @Sab: Mayonnaise is an abomination, an offense to the tongue, a degradation of sliced bread and lunch meat.

    That is all.

  75. 75.

    Alternative Fax, a hip hop artist from Idaho

    @Omnes Omnibus:

    You don’t scare me.

    Good to hear. The views of others in our field here on the topic are unknown to me, but it’s unimportant.

    I found a very funny line in an email that you might enjoy and will even know what it was autocorrected from. You can email Adam if you’re interested as I sent to him.

    Tomorrow Townes would be 75 if he’d lived. I have a plan to honor him that I hope succeeds.

  77. 77.

    Jeffro

    @Sab:

    The whole point of a sandwich is to have multiple layers on which to spread mayonnaise, in between the other stuff.

    That’s how I feel about french fries, aka “ketchup delivery devices” ;)

  79. 79.

    Sab

    @Sab: Wikipedia says it goes back to Chinese Amoy (is that Fujian?) dialect, but I am going with your version.

  80. 80.

    Old Dan and Little Ann

    I was just going to make a peanut butter and fluff sandwich. Now I need to throw some mayo and lettuce on it.

  81. 81.

    Jeffro

    Hey I see Twitler never saw a food fight he couldn’t start/get in the middle of/throw more ‘mustaise’ around…he’s now thinking he’s going to ban the ‘fake news’ from carrying any RNC debates.

    I thought no one was going to challenge His Orange Eminence anyway – what RNC debates?

    The guy only knows one thing, and it is to provoke, then turn things to shit.

  90. 90.

    Steeplejack

    House Hunters International has got to be the most maddening of the HGTV shelter shows. Currently watching two Los Angeles real-estate people trying to find an apartment in Florence, Italy, for $950,000. At least it looks like their marriage will survive this adventure, which is not my impression in most episodes.

  92. 92.

    Amir Khalid

    @Sab:
    Over here we trace the word to the Hokkien dialect spoken in Penang. Most Penangites know at least a few words of Hokkien.

  93. 93.

    Anne Laurie

    Consumer report: I’ve always been meh about mayo in general, but Japanese Kewpie mayo is worth the premium. (I think it’s the vinegar more than the egg yolks, but it makes bland sandwiches *sing*.)

  97. 97.

    Jay

    “Customs and Border Protection has compiled a list of 59 mostly American reporters, attorneys and activists for border agents to stop for questioning when crossing the U.S-Mexican border at San Diego-area checkpoints, and agents have questioned or arrested at least 21 of them, according to documents obtained by NBC station KNSD-TV and interviews with people on the list.”

    https://www.nbcnews.com/politics/immigration/u-s-officials-made-list-reporters-lawyers-activists-question-border-n980301

  99. 99.

    Achrachno

    @Amir Khalid: “It baffles me that you Americans can confuse tomato sauce with soy sauce.”

    You seem very familiar with us, you must have noticed we’re an easily confused people.

  100. 100.

    Omnes Omnibus

    @Steeplejack: “I want a home with everything I had in Dallas. But it has to be in Belgavia and I won’t go higher than $250,000. And I need green space for my cats.”

  101. 101.

    Sab

    @Amir Khalid: How many languages do you speak? How far down the list is English as far as languages you feel fluent or competent using.

    You are our resident polite pedant for English. Humbling for us monolinguals.

  105. 105.

    Amir Khalid

    @Sab:
    It is typical for a Malaysian to be fluent in three languages — Malay and English, plus your own mother tongue — and have at least a smattering of one or two more.

  106. 106.

    Amir Khalid

    @NotMax:
    It’s sold in the supermarkets here, and I think not just to white expatriates. As a tech journalist I would sometimes ask Hewlett-Packard employees about the staff discount they got on it.

  107. 107.

    Steeplejack

    @Omnes Omnibus:

    Exactly. “And why are the people here so weird? What’s up with that?”

    This couple spent the whole episode rhapsodizing about the classical beauty of Florence and wanting to own a little piece of the dream, and then at the very end, in the very short “four months later” snippet, it seemed to become clear that they’re going to set up an Airbnb that they will use occasionally. Womp womp.

    Also, their “budget” was $950,000, but the Italian real-estate guy showed them nothing under $1.1 million. WTF? Seems like they had some expensive requirements, like “must be within spitting distance of the Ponte Vecchio.” Would like those made more explicit for my predictions on which choice they will go for.

  109. 109.

    Sandia Blanca

    How is it possible that we are 106 comments in and not one person has mentioned John Cole’s MISSING JAR OF MUSTARD???

  114. 114.

    NotMax

    @NotMax

    Come to think of it, if there are shortages or steep price hikes in the U.K. post-Brexit, there will be rioting in the streets.

  117. 117.

    Aleta

    @Anne Laurie: It’s great with shredded cabbage or on cukes. There used to be a movie theater ad for it that was just a giant head of cabbage that slowly filled the screen. No image of the mayo. Its name spoken once at the tail end of the ad.

  120. 120.

    Origuy

    @Anne Laurie: Chutney and peanut butter on an English muffin sounds delicious. I just had tile put on my kitchen floor and I can’t go in there for three days. That will be one of the first things I make.

  122. 122.

    Steeplejack

    @Omnes Omnibus:

    I know the shows are rigged and the producers try to heighten the drama, but I can’t resist trying to figure out the relationship dynamics. And I do like seeing the houses and what people respond to.

    ETA: The three Florence places sucked. Maybe the only thing they had going for them was spitting distance to the Ponte Vecchio.

  124. 124.

    Yutsano

    @Amir Khalid: Because language is weird like that. It’s entirely possible to borrow a word like ketchup but have it mean something else. And in this case it’s all on us. Ketchup did in fact mean originally a type of fish sauce but in the 19th century we changed the primary preparation ingredient to tomatoes. So it’s because we just kept the name instead of calling it something else. Who knew?

    Also: the original tomato ketchup recipe called for anchovies. That sounds…even more brilliant.

  125. 125.

    suzanne

    Mayonnaise plus yellow mustard is somehow, like, logarithmically bad. Two gross things that, when added together, are more bad than the two individual condiments would indicate.

  130. 130.

    Yutsano

    @Jay: You laugh but…a friend of mine said she wanted something like that the other day. I never understand humans sometimes…

  131. 131.

    Jay

    Could be worse, castoreium is a beaver anal gland extract used as a substitute for vanilla in ice cream.

  132. 132.

    Barbara

    @Sab: I worked for a summer for someone who ate pb and bacon sandwiches for breakfast, along with scotch whiskey.

    My favorite pb sandwich combination is with strawberries, agave and flax seed. No alcohol is involved. When I run low on proper desserts I make an impromptu Reeses by pressing bittersweet chips into a spoonful of peanut butter. I would not have survived childhood without peanut butter.

  133. 133.

    suzanne

    @mrmoshpotato: Yes. Mayo is slimy and yellow mustard is like good food that was left out to spoil.

    Dijon mustard is delicious. That shit in a squeeze bottle is like licking a dog’s ass.

  137. 137.

    Jay

    @Yutsano:

    People have spent masses of time and money, trying to come up with a meatless meat substitute that captures all the complexity of meat.

    Dated a Vegan for a while who was trying to launch an array of vegan pates. Tasted like baby food, not pate. Didn’t have the fats, mouth feel, flavour or serving texture.

    Money’s Mushrooms came up with a mushroom burger that came close, but in the end, you had to accept that you were eating mostly a Portabello mushroom.

    A&W has come closest so far with their Meatless Burger, but unless you eat your burgers “factory loaded”, it’s close, but no cigar.

  139. 139.

    suzanne

    @Luthe: I like the smell of bacon more than the taste. I can take or leave bacon. Absolutely do not like ham. Food should not be that color.

  144. 144.

    scav

    @Yutsano: Anchovies might just possibly make tomato catchup edible. I’ve been wondering about attempting some mushroom catchup for a while though.

  146. 146.

    NotMax

    Speaking of eating moose –

    A military chaplain (Rev. Joshua Fraser) writing of a dinner in an Indian camp on the upper Ottawa thus describes a dish of muffle ‘The crowning dish was that grandest of all dishes moose mouffle. This is the immense upper lip and nostrils of the animal, and I have no hesitation in pronouncing it one of the most toothsome and savoury of all the dishes within the range of the gastronomic art. It is white and tender as spring chicken, yet firm and substantial as fresh beef, with a flavor combining the excellencies of both. I eat to repletion, yet was not sensible of any of that uneasy heaviness which generally follows a too hearty meal.’ Source

  147. 147.

    Jay

    @NotMax:

    Back around 1974, on a wet, cold winters day, in Fundy National Park, Tar, a blab/x, running off leash, found and rolled in ambergris. Funny thing is, ambergris is used in perfumery, for it’s ability to capture and hold any scent, but first it has to be “stripped” of it’s previous scent, captured in a Sperm Whales stomach.

    They don’t tell you about that part.

    A 60 mile drive in a station wagon with all the windows rolled down, in the February rain, to a groomers, will burn that fact deep into your soul, and the dog, when wet for the next 6 months, will remind you.

  148. 148.

    Jacel

    These products are a surprising misstep from Heinz, after they introduced a good non-crap-ingredients mustard as a companion to their incumbent ketchup brand a few years ago.

  149. 149.

    Barbara

    @Jay: the only way to make vegan pate palatable is to incorporate some kind of nuts, like cashew cream. This is also true for vegan pumpkin pie.

  150. 150.

    Amir Khalid

    In my view, The One True Mustard is Colman’s. Just don’t try swallowing it by the jar, as some weird people on YouTube have tried. It’s not meant to be taken that way, it’s too strong for that, and any such attempt will not end well.

  151. 151.

    Sab

    @Amir Khalid: Just spent an hour babbling with my sister who speaks Mandarin, Shanghainese, French, as well as her native English and a bit of Japanese and Korean. She was fascinated about ketchup, and also the Fujian and Hokkainese connection. She also has a very impressive US Southern acent in English, which drives the rest of her family crazy.

    I only speak English, read French , and understand a smattering of Spanish, Hebrew and Gaelic ( who knows any of that?) I think her language fluency is very weird, but I live in America.

  153. 153.

    ??? Goku (aka Amerikan Baka) ??

    OT: This is going to sound really stupid, but dust mites freak me out. The very thought that these things are crawling around in my bedding, the carpets I walk on, the sofas and chairs I sit on, my clothing; floating in the very air I breathe is very disquieting. It’s true I can’t see them or feel them. They don’t cause me any harm. The “not seeing them” doesn’t really help. I think I have a problem with dust mites and not other microbes simply because I don’t like insects in general.

    They’re even in our cars so that’s not an escape either. Probably not going to get much sleep tonight after reading about them.

  154. 154.

    Jay

    @??? Goku (aka Amerikan Baka) ??:

    Chill. Between mites of assorted types and bacteria, each one of us is a walking, talking Amazon forest. When the ecosystem is healthy, all is well. When you futz with the ecosystem, the consequences can be severe.

    Think of the dust mites like little WallE’s carefully recycling all the dead cells that fall off you, with out whom, you would have to wade through the castoff cells like deep snow.

  156. 156.

    Wapiti

    @Jay: I sometimes use “my 300 million closest friends” when talking about my gut bacteria. I guess that number is actually low; we’ve got something like 10-30 trillion microbes of all sorts, along for the ride. (So at least as many microbe cells as human cells.)

  157. 157.

    ??? Goku (aka Amerikan Baka) ??

    @Jay:
    I’d rather have to clean up my excess dead skin myself than have those eldritch abominations exist. I’m well aware there’s lots of microbes on my body, as well as inside me. But they don’t bother me as much. They’re tiny blobs that move around. Not as scary as creatures with eight legs that scurry around, unseen, in the millions in our bedsheets.

  159. 159.

    Jay

    @??? Goku (aka Amerikan Baka) ??:

    You would be cleaning up your body weight 16 times a year.

    You would have to vacume 8 times a day to prevent your dead cells from becoming a neucleus for deadly virii and bacteria.

    A lot easier to have the bioorgasims that live with us as almost pets, do the job.

  160. 160.

    ??? Goku (aka Amerikan Baka) ??

    @Jay:
    Source? Besides, I’m sure in a world without dust mites, somebody would have have made a Roomba-esque vacuum cleaner capable of holding the typical amounts of dirt manual vacuum cleaners do. I’d prefer the peace of mind

  162. 162.

    Jay

    @??? Goku (aka Amerikan Baka) ??:

    Follicle motes are the either the pregener or postgener of dust mites. They live in the follocles of your hair, ( body, head, face, ears, nose),

    Suck it up butter cup.

    With out follicle mites, you would be bald, hairless, suffer from a broad array of skin diseases and infections, and have a higly compromised immune system.

    The Roomba came out in 2002. The vacume, 1860’s.

    With out dust mites colonizing our debris, we would have never made it out of Africa.

  167. 167.

    ??? Goku (aka Amerikan Baka) ??

    @Jay: @Fair Economist:

    They don’t like the light apparently. Would sleeping with the lights on help? I’m going to bathe myself in tea tree oil one of these days. Also, the younger you are, the less likely you are to have Demodex.

  172. 172.

    ??? Goku (aka Amerikan Baka) ??

    @Jay:
    Like I said, I couldn’t care less about the bacteria on my skin and in my body, such as my gut. I hate bugs. They give me the creeps.

  174. 174.

    ??? Goku (aka Amerikan Baka) ??

    @Jay:
    Tell you what. Every six weeks for the next year, I’m going to wash with tea tree oil. We’ll see if I end up “bald, with a highly compromised immune system, and skin infections”.

  175. 175.

    John Revolta

    Well this has been a helluva day. First Betty C. gets bit on the face by a wolf spider and now it’s billions and billions of creepy fuckers living on my nose hairs. I can’t wait to see what’s waiting for me in Slumberland.

  177. 177.

    Fair Economist

    @??? Goku (aka Amerikan Baka) ??: Dunno how follicke mites would respond to indefinite light. They would still be happy chewing inside your follicles. I’m sure they would manage to get it on eventually, they would probably just not get to have as much fun.

  178. 178.

    Jay

    @??? Goku (aka Amerikan Baka) ??:

    “Although there is little evidence of efficacy, it is typically used as a topical medication in low concentrations by folk medicine for attempted treatments of skin conditions.[2][3][4] Tea tree oil is claimed as useful for treating dandruff, acne, lice, herpes, insect bites, scabies, and skin fungal or bacterial infections.[3][4][5] However, the quality of the evidence for efficacy in these conditions is minimal.[3][6] Tea tree oil is neither a patented product nor an approved drug,[4] and is poisonous if consumed by mouth.[7]”

    https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tea_tree_oil

  182. 182.

    Fair Economist

    @John Revolta: It’s billions of germs. There’s probably only a few million creepy spider relatives living on you.

    (As pointed out above they are probably good for you, not really creepy. I wouldn’t be surprised if skin oils had stuff in them specifically to help feed them.)

  183. 183.

    ??? Goku (aka Amerikan Baka) ??

    @Jay:

    Tea tree oil won’t effect demodex and other species.

    Remember, it’s not a lie if you believe it //

    TBH, I remember reading about those mites in the past. I was freaked out at the time, but I eventually forgot. I guess it’s best if I just don’t think about it.

    @Fair Economist:

    It stands to reason that if they couldn’t leave the follicles, they would eventually die out, not being able to mate.

  185. 185.

    sukabi

    @Jay: they might adjust, but constant exposure to light will have an adverse effect on the human body…sleep cycles screwed up, hormones messed up…

  186. 186.

    Fair Economist

    @NotMax: Just tell them they *are* in the BJ calendar. They don’t have the visual apparatus to see for themselves. You could make millions happy!

  187. 187.

    ??? Goku (aka Amerikan Baka) ??

    @sukabi:
    Actually, I slept just fine for years with a window candle on in my room. My house has them in all the street facing windows and I never bothered to turn the one in my room off. It’s bright enough to read by and lights up the room.

  189. 189.

    Jay

    @??? Goku (aka Amerikan Baka) ??:

    They can leave the follicles in light, they just prefer the dark.

    Remember those sci-fi plots where our universe is just a molecule or atom in another universe?

    So we are a planet, cononized by millions of species, mostly living in harmony. A walking ecosystem. Some of the colonists that live inside are inside our very cells. All of them help keep this walking planet healthy.

  190. 190.

    Jay

    @sukabi:

    Nope. It’s the sleep cycles getting futzed up that has the impact. Even the 2 week shift wasn’t enough to not damage the sleep cycle.

    It’s not the light.

  191. 191.

    ??? Goku (aka Amerikan Baka) ??

    @Jay:
    I understand what you’re saying. As I said, I think it’s best to try to just not think about it.

  193. 193.

    ??? Goku (aka Amerikan Baka) ??

    @Jay:
    I admit I didn’t research the tea tree oil much. I’m very much against woo of any kind.

  195. 195.

    Jay

    @??? Goku (aka Amerikan Baka) ??:

    I think it’s actually important to think about.

    For example, for medical reasons, you do a course of antibiotics.

    For every bad guy they kill, there’s 1,000, 10,000 good guys dead as collateral damage.

    Antibacterial soap for example.

    There’s shit loads of “woo” out there that if you buy into it, has severe consequences for your ecosystem.

    We should remember that from time to time.

  197. 197.

    ??? Goku (aka Amerikan Baka) ??

    @Jay:
    I meant not think about the mites because I find them disturbing. I was referring to myself. I’m a nursing student so of course I think about the body’s microbiota when it comes to antibiotics.

  199. 199.

    smike

    @Jay:
    I found:
    cil·i·a
    Dictionary result for cilia
    /ˈsilēə/

    plural form of cilium.

    Dunno. Been wrong before.

  200. 200.

    Jay

    @smike:

    Cool@??? Goku (aka Amerikan Baka) ??:

    The mites, lice and spiders are also part of the ecosystem, along with the ecosystem that used to live in the furs we used to sleep in, but has now migrated to sheets.

    Anybody know at what temps bedbugs go dormant?

    I’m thinking of taking a White House tour with a fake insulin pump.

  201. 201.

    different-church-lady

    DEAR HEINZ:

    IF I WANT TWO OF MY CONDIMENTS MIXED TOGETHER I CAN DO IT MY FUCKIN’ SELF.

    SIGNED,
    SHOUTY-CHURCH-LADY

  203. 203.

    Jay

    @different-church-lady:

    Some people don’t have the time to use two different squeeze bottles.

    Remember the old daze when ketchup required a knife, or the deadly, inaccurate tap, tap, tap, splooge?

  204. 204.

    Anne Laurie

    @Omnes Omnibus:

    Oh, high quality evil. That makes it soooooo much better.

    I’ll take your share of the Kewpie mayo, and you can have my share of the Wisconsin lutefisk cheddar. Fair?

  205. 205.

    different-church-lady

    @Jay:

    Some people don’t have the time to use two different squeeze bottles.

    SOME PEOPLE CAN KISS MY ASS.

    I’M NOT SHOUTING AT YOU. I’M JUST SAYIN’.

  212. 212.

    Uncle Cosmo

    @Sab: Mayo is good for meat & fish salads, & turkey sammiches after the Great American Pig-Out (bka Thanksgiving). Miracle Whip (“Murkle Whup” sayowth of the Potomac) is however both vile & evil. (NB I believe “Miracle Whip” was Mr Kraft’s nom de gloom in Tampa.)

  214. 214.

    karen marie

    @Jim, Foolish Literalist: Have you had peanut butter and bacon? OMG – it is the best thing ever. On toasted white bread. Like you’ve died and gone to heaven.

    Also too, I don’t know if anyone mentioned it (I am on my way out the door, don’t have time to read 200 comments) but DIY mayo is THE BEST! It is so easy. You make it with a whole egg, oil, lemon juice or vinegar, salt, a clove of diced garlic, and a slap of dijon mustard, in a jar, with a stick blender. It’s not stick-to-the-ceiling thick like store bought but 10,000,000 times more delicious. And if you want “mayomust,” sub your mustard of choice for the dijon, and add more at the end to get it the way you want it. Ditto, mayocue.

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