The primaries summed up in one tweet. pic.twitter.com/syUhfqo0vw
— The Hoarse Whisperer (@HoarseWisperer) April 2, 2019
CNN will host 5 town halls next week with 2020 Democratic candidates:
• Kirsten Gillibrand on April 9
• Jay Inslee on April 10
• Julián Castro on April 11
• Marianne Williamson on April 14
• Andrew Yang on April 14 https://t.co/hvnUVlRiPx pic.twitter.com/O4sPXgphww— CNN (@CNN) April 2, 2019
Give CNN credit: They are committed to the bit.
My personal bet: Third or fourth questioner at Yang’s event brings up the Great Foreskin Controversy. Viral video of the evening will be how the moderator (or the unfortunate CNN staffers) manage this, hopefully before the show&tell portion of the evening begins.
Meanwhile, Marianne Williamson, or her handlers, decides that she can’t participate because the aura in the hall is wrong, or she remembers that’s the night she’s supposed to be spiritually harmonizing her jade vaginal egg. She goes back to her safe space, and bumps up her speaking fees to reflect her new ‘presidential candidate’ status. (I am no doubt being very unfair to these candidates; blame it on the hay fever.)
Good. https://t.co/z9uI9T74rO
— emptywheel (@emptywheel) April 2, 2019
On the brighter side:
Serious offer: I will write a colum that analyzes Cillizza’s terrible analysis. In lieu of a salary, the organization needs to fund scholarships for students who are struggling financially. Dm with serious offers only. https://t.co/d64ZgO9hDD
— Soledad O'Brien (@soledadobrien) April 2, 2019
Already getting real offers! Exciting!
— Soledad O'Brien (@soledadobrien) April 2, 2019
5400 RTs, 3 serious offers with next steps meetings, and we’re now searching for a title. This has been a fun day! https://t.co/ffeURkzGB1
— Soledad O'Brien (@soledadobrien) April 3, 2019
Can one of the conditions be that she gets to smack Cillizza upside the head with a large, dead fish? Because IMO, that’s the only kind of correction the Mad Bitcher might be able to understand…
Chyron HR
You don’t need to worry about that, James. It’s not a “possibility”.
OzarkHillbilly
Marianne Williamson
Andrew Yang
Question: Who are these people?
mrmoshpotato
@Chyron HR:
Damn straight. I wonder how many people hopped off the fence or even over the fence because of him.
There’s no way it might’ve affected the outcome with the Hillary hate machine going full bore.
rikyrah
Good Morning, Everyone ? ??
rikyrah
Front page of the Chicago Tribune
https://twitter.com/chicagotribune/status/1113304862870122496
different-church-lady
Not until they include Baud is this true.
JPL
@rikyrah: Happy day to you
Another Scott
@rikyrah: Looks good! He’s hoping she does, and is able to do, a good job for the city and her people.
Cheers,
Scott
mrmoshpotato
@different-church-lady: I think Baud is avoiding the goat rodeo and is going to surprise most by being a dark horse.
(We will not be surprised here. We knew all along.)
rikyrah
Lightfoot won all 50 wards
https://twitter.com/chicagotribune/status/1113263841331372033
germy
Speaking of Sausage Manufactury :
https://www.washingtonpost.com/business/economy/pork-industry-soon-will-have-more-power-over-meat-inspections/2019/04/03/12921fea-4f30-11e9-8d28-f5149e5a2fda_story.html?utm_term=.acc4a6a60eda
rikyrah
We often comment that a candidate has a certain time that they should run for something. For Preckwinkle, her time to run for Mayor was 2015. If she had run then, I have no doubt, because of how close Garcia came that she would have beat Rahm.
bemused
My first thought seeing the trump “oranges” episode was wondering if he was having a stroke. My second thought was Pence watching this with his fingers crossed.
rikyrah
Uh huh
Uh huh ?
BPS ?⚾️?? (@porterguy1969) Tweeted:
HUD has more employees than Mayor Pete got in votes. Castro went to Harvard too. He was Mayor of San Antonio -7th largest US City. Are you starting to understand my issues with the Mayor Pete mania? https://t.co/yhQV3yFt1a https://twitter.com/porterguy1969/status/1113245093731893248?s=17
rikyrah
@germy:
Yeah
Uh huh ??
rikyrah
@Chyron HR:
Muthaphucka, just shut up!??
James E Powell
@rikyrah:
Many comments about low turnout. What’s up with that? Don’t know Chicago.
Richard Guhl
My beef with Inslee is that while he says climate change is a matter of the greatest urgency, he comes across as the friendly banker approving a car loan application.
JPL
@bemused: True. When you listen to the tape, it was clear that trump knew something was off, because he kept explaining the beginnings.
He’s so obsessed with windmills, that pretty soon he will go in search of a sword. Cervantes would be so proud to
know that his hero has come to life.
plato
Fuck comey. Fuck mueller.
rikyrah
skeptical brotha ? (@skepticalbrotha) Tweeted:
Black women now hold all of Chicago’s most powerful elected positions: Cook County Board President, State’s Attorney, and Mayor. https://twitter.com/skepticalbrotha/status/1113253974264516610?s=17
rikyrah
He threatens our National Security on a daily basis ??
https://twitter.com/jonswaine/status/1113164512625143808
Gin & Tonic
@bemused: Missed that, probably mercifully. Anything like Queeg and strawberries?
SRW1
And the event be televised.
Dorothy A. Winsor
I do my morning skim thru twitter. I see a second woman saying Epstein directed her to have sex with Dersh. I see our president saying windmills give you cancer. I see a Chinese woman smuggling malware into Mar-a-Lago.
This is now our national news. Thanks Rs.
Dorothy A. Winsor
@rikyrah: Best of luck to Mayor Lightfoot. She’s taken on a big job that’s been royally screwed up in the past.
JPL
@Dorothy A. Winsor: Hadn’t heard about the new allegation about Dersh, and might I add that maybe next summer he’ll be completely shunned at Martha’s Vineyard.
SRW1
@germy:
What could go wrong?
rikyrah
Hmmm???
A theory about William Weld and Bernie
https://twitter.com/BlueSteelDC/status/1113410633221984257
Spanky
@rikyrah: A minor quibble: Not “threatens”, but “degrades”.
OK, maybe not minor, but I wish the msm would point out how all these clowns are compromising the country on a daily basis. I also wish I had a unicorn.
A Ghost To Most
Reality has gotten truly weird. I blame comic book movies.
Congratulations to Lightfoot and Chicago.
If being mayor is first prize, what was second prize?
A Ghost To Most
@JPL:
Donald Quixote.
Dorothy A. Winsor
It’s Lawrence Ferlinghetti’s hundredth birthday. Here’s one of his poems.
“Pity The Nation”
Pity the nation whose people are sheep,
and whose shepherds mislead them.
Pity the nation whose leaders are liars, whose sages are silenced,
and whose bigots haunt the airwaves.
Pity the nation that raises not its voice,
except to praise conquerors and acclaim the bully as hero
and aims to rule the world with force and by torture.
Pity the nation that knows no other language but its own
and no other culture but its own.
Pity the nation whose breath is money
and sleeps the sleep of the too well fed.
Pity the nation — oh, pity the people who allow their rights to erode
and their freedoms to be washed away.
My country, tears of thee, sweet land of liberty.”
OzarkHillbilly
@SRW1: Asked and answered.
Amir Khalid
@germy:
I’m really glad I don’t eat American pork products anyway.
tobie
After seeing last night’s disappointing WI Supreme Court election results, and noticing how low the turn-out in Milwaukee was, my new criterion for what makes a good candidate is if they can excite irregular Democratic voters in places where we need them most–Milwaukee, Detroit, Allentown, Bethlehem, etc. I don’t see Buttigieg doing this but I could be wrong. The debates will be a tell. In the meantime, it looks like the DNC’s decision to hold the convention in Milwaukee was a smart one.
Kay
@JPL:
You really wonder about the disconnect. The biggest private sector development project in this area of Ohio- by a mile- is a new solar panel manufacturing facility. It’s not like people aren’t benefitting from alternative energy! It’s not some distant “California” thing- they work in it. We have a municipal solar field here- in a 75% Trump county. Publicly-owned and funded They take school groups out there and show it off.
It’s this deliberate dumbness- he’s like some kind of bizarre, malevolent 1980s-era sitcom actor. It’s not anywhere close to reality.
germy
@JPL:
Is it a new allegation, though?
The most recent news about the Dersh is how he’s advising this administration on Middle East policy.
Amir Khalid
I need some help. Google Translate was unable to render this in English for me.
Dorothy A. Winsor
@Kay: Iowa gets something like 15% of its power from wind. I suspect most of its citizens don’t know that though.
zhena gogolia
@rikyrah:
I worry that this kind of thing is helping Bernie. Let Buttigieg have his moment in the sun and take votes away from BS! He’s not going to be the nominee.
I truly worry that Sanders is getting help from Russia to push out the other candidates. WE CANNOT HAVE HIM BE THE NOMINEE!
zhena gogolia
@Gin & Tonic:
THE MESS BOYS ATE THE ORIGINS, I MEAN THE ORANGES
?BillinGlendaleCA
@tobie:
As I pointed out in a thread downstairs…if we went by election night results, there would have been 3 Republican Congresscritters in the OC that got re-elected as opposed to 3 freshman Democratic Congresscritters.
JPL
@Kay: He’s fixated on windmills because he opposed a wind farm near his course in Scotland. Letting go is not an option for him, but the new windmills cause cancer is off. I watch CBS Morning News and they ignored his quaffs yesterday and instead focused on Joe Biden. In fairness I did turn it off after thirty minutes.
?BillinGlendaleCA
@Amir Khalid: Forget it Amir, it’s Crazytown.
kindness
Substitute that fish with a light sabre and I’m all in. Cillizza constantly hurts us Dems more than Republicans. One wonders if he is secretly on Republican’s payroll.
Jim, Foolish Literalist
@Amir Khalid: Marianne Williamson is a new age spiritual sort, as I understand, but not as far into the pseudo-mystic woo-woo as Anne Laurie suggests (I could be wrong). The jade vaginal egg I believe comes from whatever online-scam/long-running nervous breakdown Gwyneth Paltrow has been running. Remember when she was an actress?
tobie
@?BillinGlendaleCA: I gather the turnout pattern was skewed with rural and exurban communities coming out big last night. Your stats bring that home. To be fair, Madison turned out, too, but Milwaukee didn’t, and we will need largely African-American, struggling urban centers like Milwaukee, Detroit, St. Louis, Cincinnati and Cleveland to turn out to win the electoral college in 2020.
OzarkHillbilly
@Dorothy A. Winsor: I rather suspect most residents of Iowa, while ignorant of the exact percentage are well aware they get a considerable amount of their electricity from wind power. One drive across Iowa and thru the countless wind farms makes it hard to ignore.
Amir Khalid
@Jim, Foolish Literalist:
I think I last saw a Blythe Danner movie more recently than I last saw a Gwyneth Paltrow movie.
OzarkHillbilly
@tobie: St Louis and KC can’t turn Misery blue.
NotMax
Couple of things.
1) A timely reminder.
2) Oddity discovered on Amazon Prime, under the title Brotherhood, a series of three recently produced big budget TV movies (with English subtitles) based on the Winnetou series, apparently an extremely and perennially popular franchise in Germany. 19th century American Old West, in and near Roswell. Riddled with anachronisms and historical inaccuracies, nevertheless entertaining and beautifully filmed (the outdoor vistas are truly spectacular). Trailer (in German, no subtitles).
Betty Cracker
@tobie: You could be right, but I don’t think we can possibly know that for months and months, and I’m rapidly concluding that trying to read the tea-leaves and “stan” (as the kids say) for candidates at this stage is unnecessarily creating its own toxic environment. That cat’s out of the bag, unfortunately. But I am seriously considering ignoring all this shit until mid-summer, when the weather drives me indoors! :)
p.a.
Is Soledad actually employed by a MSM outlet? She seems far too mentally competent be retained as an employee.
raven
@Betty Cracker: me three
NotMax
Bossa nova on line 2.
;)
Jim, Foolish Literalist
@Betty Cracker: I watched Julian Castro on TRMS last night and was favorably impressed, but with the exception of Obama I don’t tend to respond to the same candidates and types of charisma most people seem to.
One of my way-too early concerns is that our field is light on foreign policy; people don’t get deep into it, but they do want some impression of competence or, as we’re seeing now, “toughness”, even a cartoonish version of it. And I don’t see anyone out there who can do for a ticket what Biden did for Obama, maybe Chris Murphy. Letting it be understood that Very Serious Joe Biden would be SoS might go a long way with persuading Villagers and the local news headline writers who parrot them that we got that.
Jim, Foolish Literalist
@Amir Khalid: Time better spent, but that Shakespeare one was kind of a cute sitcom with costumes, elevated at the end by National Treasure Judi Dench
Dorothy A. Winsor
Open thread: I had a routine (for heart attack patients) 6 month doctor appointment Monday. Some liver enzyme was elevated and he sent me to the hospital to have an ultrasound “stat.” I’m waiting for the results. He suggested gall bladder surgery. Blech. I swear once you fall into the hands of the medical people, they find more and more wrong.
ETA: I had to look up what Betty meant by “stan.” Overly obsess as with a celebrity. That fits.
tobie
@OzarkHillbilly: You’re probably right.
@Betty Cracker: I agree it’s far too early to tell who will move people to vote, and especially who will move infrequent voters to vote, but the challenges facing any Democratic candidate are clear. And they’re structural–things like people having to work multiple jobs while relying on a lousy public bus system or having to have a stable permanent address attested to in select documents–which makes this such a tough nut to crack.
e markham
just an upvote to this entry, thanks Anne
patrick II
Back in 2013 I watched Soledad O’Brien on CNN interrupt a couple of republican propagandist liars and correct them with facts much like I have seen Joy Reid do, but even more bluntly. I thought, when I watched it, “I wonder how much longer she will be working at CNN?”.
It turns out, not much longer. The story is she wanted to start her own “Starfish Media Group” that made some documentaries, and joined Real Sports with Bryant Gumbel, but without evidence other than I know she bruised some republican snowflake feelings, I assumed she was fired. Does anyone know the full story behind that? Was she really happy to go?
raven
@NotMax: Strange I was just listening to this
NOVA – Agua de Beber (Water to Drink) – Antonio Carlos Jobim
Alien Radio
@Kay: You mean he’s crossed the line between everyday villainy and Cartoonish Supervillainy
Ladyraxterinok
@NotMax: Karl May wrote the Winnetou series. Incredibly popular in Germany and Europe. Mercedes Lackey, major science fiction/fantasy author from OK, wrote a bit about author and phenomenon in introductory remarks to her recent book From a High Tower. I believe she uses Winnerou and a touring wild west show in a retelling/version of Rapunzel.
Betty Cracker
@tobie: You are right; the problems are structural, and it will be a tough nut to crack. Primary slap-fights may be a waste of time at this point, but addressing those structural barriers isn’t, and the earlier we get involved in that, the better!
Major Major Major Major
@Jim, Foolish Literalist: yeah, I am absolutely not ruling out any (sensible) candidate until we get some detailed foreign policy statements.
geg6
Totally off any possible political topic, but I was having fun last night watching HGTV. An old friend’s aunt’s house in Sewickley was given a makeover by Leanne and Steve Ford on last night’s Restored by the Fords. I was there many times when we were young adults and it was really cool seeing it looking new and shiny again. The aunt just sold it about a year ago and this couple brought in the Fords.
Back in the mid-70s (when the house was built, BTW), this unmarried aunt of my friend was a real feminist role model for me. She was a very successful business woman who had created and built her own business. She never married or had kids. She built this beautiful, huge house and traveled and lived exactly how she wished. She had the biggest and most fabulous closets I’ve ever seen.
Anyway, the house when built was the quintessential 70s modern. The Fords did a great job of honoring the style and feel of that era, but with a modern eye. I’m really happy for the family who now lives there. It always was and still is a spectacular house.
geg6
@rikyrah:
I have to say, I pretty much agree with that sentiment. I like Julian Castro a ton more than I like Mayor Pete, from everything I’ve seen so far.
Redshift
@Dorothy A. Winsor:
I’d say it’s their cunning plan to help their pals at the National Enquirer compete with mainstream newspapers by making their headlines look exactly the same, but I know they’re not competent enough for cunning plans.
geg6
@p.a.:
She has a syndicated show “As a Matter of Fact.” It’s on Sunday mornings and repeated late Sunday night here. It’s pretty good.
tobie
@Betty Cracker: Are you at all involved with Andrew Gillum’s Bring It Home Florida registration effort? I know you’re living in a remote location with more alligators than people, so it may be hard to do the hands-on work. I liked this quote from Gillum when he launched the group:
I still give regularly to the League of Women Voters for registration efforts but I’d love to hear people’s thoughts on the most effective voter registration groups.
Betty Cracker
@geg6: I’ve been binge-watching HGTV to get budget makeover ideas for our ramshackle money pit. I am almost confident I can build a platform bed and tufted headboard but may yet chicken out.
Eunicecycle
The new Chicago mayor is from my little town in Ohio! Her mother was the first black woman on the school board.
Redshift
@Jim, Foolish Literalist: I don’t disagree, but I also seem to recall it being generally believed that foreign policy doesn’t sway anybody’s votes. So yeah, it’s important, but electorally it’s mainly something pundits care about, and I think satisfying them by making noises about appointments and advisors can wait until the nomination is wrapped up.
Kathleen
@Dorothy A. Winsor: I am stunned by its relevance.
Villago Delenda Est
What Cillizza (and the utter asshat Chuckles the Toddler) needs is a tumbrel ride.
Fair Economist
@rikyrah:
And even though Castro has much more governmental experience, people were complaining, with some justification, that his resume was thin for President.
Betty Cracker
@tobie: I am not, but you’re right, that’s a great quote.
Kathleen
@zhena gogolia: I agree with you. My concern also.
Kathleen
@kindness: To me that’s not a secret. The Lizatd and 99% of his media who peers are in the tank for Rethugs/Bernie (no difference).
JMG
Mayor Pete seems like a good fellow with a good record as Mayor. It was inevitable that given his biography, he’d draw considerable media attention. It’s a long race. Every candidate is going to get their little media boomlet and following media backlash, because most of our political media is trapped in its decades old formulas of campaign coverage. Which is a real polite way to say they’re lazy and shallow.
Ladyraxterinok
@tobie: Helping with IDs, transportation. AND getting rid or laws hindering minorities, seniors, poor people, students voting!!
Maybe a front page post with links, suggestion, hints!!
rikyrah
Trump appears to be changing his mind on Mueller report release
Rachel Maddow reports on the latest in the fight for the release of Robert Mueller Trump Russia report to Congress and to the American public, noting that Donald Trump’s comfort with the release of the report is waning.
Barbara
@zhena gogolia: I hesitate to say this, but as the first gay candidate for president, I assume that Buttigieg’s fundraising was definitely assisted by the many, many people who, similar to Emily’s List, really want to see gay people succeed in elective office. My county had one of the first gay county board members elected in the nation and when I told my husband I wanted to support him with a donation, he told me it really wasn’t necessary, because he didn’t have to raise money, ever, just for the local election, because so many people outside the county wanted to see him succeed they basically raised money on his behalf. So it didn’t surprise me that his fundraising was as strong as it was. I wonder sometimes whether journalists know anything real and gritty about how politics actually works.
oldgold
@Dorothy A. Winsor:
36.6% of electricity generated in Iowa is from wind power.
By 2020, it will be 40%.
Smedley Darlington Prunebanks (formerly Mumphrey, et al.)
Judiciary Committee just voted to supœna the full Mueller report.
rikyrah
Bizarre breach of Mar-a-Lago highlights Trump security ineptitude
Rachel Maddow reports on the strange story of a woman who wandered Mar-a-Lago during a presidential visit and was only caught by a resort receptionist whereupon it was discovered the woman had four cell phones, a laptop, an external hard drive, and a thumb drive reportedly containing malware.
Barbara
@rikyrah: Well, duh, as his staff prepares the Cliff Notes version of what is actually in the report it might not be so appealing after all. Who coooda node!
Smedley Darlington Prunebanks (formerly Mumphrey, et al.)
@Barbara:
Ah, but we’ve already had a gay president. It was an open secret in the 1850’s that James Buchanan was gay.
Ladyraxterinok
@Fair Economist: Which Castro spoke at the dem national convention in 2012? I was underwhelmed by the Castro who spoke.
Probably because he was over-hyped by the M$M as ‘the new Obama.’
Omnes Omnibus
@tobie: Have you considered that Milwaukee is ground zero for voter suppression activity in WI? Voter ID has a real world effect.
rikyrah
Julián Castro, from humble beginnings to the president’s cabinet
Rachel Maddow reviews some of the biographical details of Julián Castro’s life, including his experience in politics and government and his family history.
Castro predicts Texas, Arizona, Florida 2020 wins if nominated
Julián Castro, former Obama HUD secretary, talks with Rachel Maddow about his decision to run for president in 2020 and the qualities he brings to the race that will give Democrats the advantage in taking back the White House.
Castro: Trump administration ‘sloppiest’ on security matters
Julián Castro, Democratic candidate for president in 2020, talks with Rachel Maddow about his criticisms of the Donald Trump administration’s handling of classified and national security matters, as well as Trump’s policy of cruelty at the border.
zhena gogolia
@Omnes Omnibus:
As I said on a dead thread, OUTAGAMIE COUNTY IN DA NEWS
Never thought I’d see Outagamie County front-paged on BJ.
Ruckus
@Kay:
He wouldn’t be Donald if he was anywhere close to reality.
And it’s not deliberate. That portends ability to form some level of thought, even if said thought is horrible. He doesn’t think, he responds to malicious input, say faux news…… Or I repeat myself – the conservative puke funnel.
Tony Jay
Open Thread? Good. Sorry about this, but I need to vent again.
Brexit News – Why can’t you just let me die?
I’ll say one thing for Conservatives of all breeds and nationalities. They are bloody relentless. Whether its beaten into them at Arrogant Bastard School or just a characteristic innate to the breed, like a propensity for neck-fat and involvement in tax avoidance schemes, these turds just will not flush. Thoughtless entitlement can evidently get you across a sea of shit that a more ethical and rounded person would become bogged down in, and as long as they can detect even the faintest whiff of an opportunity for self-advancement they’ll keep on paddling, hoarding all the emergency rations for themselves and chucking the weak and vulnerable overboard whenever they think no one’s looking. Just living in a world with them is exhausting, I can’t even imagine how much worse it would be to have to negotiate with them.
Anyway, I suppose I’d better clarify what, exactly, has been happening in Ye Olde Westminster over the last week or so. Not an easy task, given that the depth of the rift in consensus reality underlying the old Palace’s foundations could swallow at least a month’s supply of Trump Lies (yeah, it’s that big) but I’ll give it a crack.
When last we spoke Parliament had got the Government in a headlock and wrestled away the authority to choose what kind of business it would most like to talk about. Drastic, yes, but necessary because Theresa May and her Cabal of incompetent dunderbollocks had spent the last three years mastering the ‘one, simple trick’ to stop the rest of the UK’s democratically elected representatives from having any say whatsoever in the course of the nation’s future. The idea behind it all was pretty (perhaps too) simple. Ask MPs what kind of solution they would favour to end the ‘Great British Balls-Up’, sift through the suggestions, discarding the ones with least chance of gaining support (“Just crown me Supreme Leader”, “Whatever we do, let’s do it naked”, “I know, let’s ask Nigel”) until what was left could be debated and voted on to get a sense of where, exactly, Parliament’s head was at. Sort of like having a referendum, but without the helpful input from Facebook and the GRU being so overt. The winning suggestion or suggestions would be put to the Government with a tactful little note attached saying “This is what a majority looks like, dear” and we could go from there.
But not so fast.
As it happened, the Dread Lady of Downing Street and her advisors weren’t quite done with cock-blocking the concept of Parliamentary sovereignty. Following a truly heart-wrenchingly emotional (“You’ve misspelt ‘Cringingly embarrassing’” – Ed) meeting with the 1922 Committee (the workplace Union for Tory backbench MPs) it was announced that she would be willing to step down as Prime Minister if MPs would only vote through her godawful Withdrawal Deal. Now, given the stonkingly huge defeats it had already suffered the previous two times she’d exposed it to scrutiny you’d have thought she’d have wanted to spare herself another dose of humiliation, but these are Tories, and they don’t do things like what normal people do. In addition, there was the small matter of the Speaker of the House already saying she couldn’t have a third vote on her Necro-Deal without there actually being something different in it, but in the tricksie-pixie world of Tory make-believe that was a problem for tomorrow to solve, and we all know who tomorrow belongs to, don’t we?
So, what went ahead that afternoon and evening was an actual debate with actual Members of Parliament actually talking about what the solution to Brexit could be. So novel and, some might say, bracingly democratic was this unusual sight that the Government choose, with typical class, to whip its MPs to vote against the procedural business motion that would allow it to happen, thus ‘honouring’ its promise to listen to other opinions in the breach rather than in the observance. I can only assume that Theresa May has developed a flagellant’s taste for the lash of defeat because she certainly never lets an opportunity for a leathering go by, and this was no different. Resignations were announced, whips were broken, the Government lost, the debate proceeded. In the end the Speaker bounced up from his throne, eagerly contemplating which silver-fox of a character actor would be playing him in the inevitable Channel 4 docudrama (Simon Callow has stopped taking his calls and gone on a walking tour of the Trossochs instead) and selected 8 motions to be voted on.
I won’t bore you with a run-down of…. Oh, go on then.
Motion B: No-Deal in the absence of a Withdrawal Agreement
Put forward by Brexiteer cheese-brain and/or U.S. Presidential pseudonym John Baron, calling for a No-Deal Brexit on 12 April if Parliament couldn’t agree on any other deal to detonate a million tons of TNT under the economy and leave society spread-eagled on a table praying for a swift death that will not come, like John Hurt after that foetal alien exploded from his chest and ran off to become MP for North East Somerset. Why? How? Stop it with that dago-talk and get me another G and T, bah!
Defeated 400 to 160.
Motion C: Customs Union
Former Tory Chancellor Kenneth ‘Goering with good PR’ Clarke’s plan ordering the Government to commit to negotiating a “permanent and comprehensive UK-wide customs union with the EU” that would reduce the damage of Brexit from 50 megatons to a mere 20 megatons. Hair-messing territory, obviously, but since it has the words “Government” and “negotiating” in the same sentence…. (Insert gif of Stewie Griffin looking awkward and going “Uh, Yeah, about… that”)
Defeated 271 to 265.
Motion D: Common Market 2.0
A cross-party plan that would basically add participation in the Single Market and membership of the European Free Trade Association (Efta) and European Economic Area to Motion C. The most Brexit-in-name-only of all the choices, and therefore something the Tory Party base would see as tantamount to unilateral surrender to the ghastly Hun and his ilk, while for Remainers it would be a case of “All the cons, none of the pros, so why Leave at all?”
Defeated 283 to 189.
Motion E: Confirmatory Public Vote
The thrice-beloved Kyle/Wilson/Beckett amendment that would require a public vote to confirm any Brexit deal passed by parliament before its ratification. A 2nd Referendum by another name, which is why the fight over which options would be put to the public if it passed would be more Kill Bill – Volume One than Tyson v Holyfield, though ears would still be bitten.
Defeated 295 to 268
Motion K: Labour’s alternate plan
How best to describe this? More of a negotiator’s first draft than a real policy. A bespoke Customs Union but no Single Market. Not all the way in but not all the way out, satisfying no-one. Basically hanging around with the E.U. and going dutch on cocktails at the bar, but the EU can’t stay over and there’s no spare toothbrush in the bathroom.
Defeated 307 to 237
Motion L: Revocation to avoid No-Deal
Cross-party but put up by the Scottish Nationalists, to seek an extension to the Brexit process, and if this is not possible, then Parliament would choose between either No-Deal or revoking article 50, followed by an inquiry to assess the future relationship likely to be acceptable to Brussels and have majority support in the UK. More or less a case of “This is what we should have done years ago, but didn’t, because fuck you, that’s why.”
Defeated 293 to 184
Motion H: Efta and EEA
Truly pointless Tory Brexiteer motion that would ask for a short extension to Brexit so the UK could arrange membership of Efta and send The Maybot back to Brussels to ask for yet more changes to the Northern Ireland Backstop and various other Brexiteer bugbears, except this time “Just Bellow A Bit Louder Love, They Can’t Hear You!!!” Wankers.
Defeated 377 to 64
Motion O: Contingent Preferential Arrangements
Not, as you might think, a sequel to early 80’s ultra-soft-porn classic ‘Private Lessons’, this one was even more of a pointless Brexiteer unicorn hunt, instructing the Government to agree ‘mates-rates’ with the EU on all kinds of complicated trade issues in the event that actual long and exhaustive negotiations can’t get a deal that Parliament can swallow. It’s just… what’s the point? Plus, it’s put forward by a guy named Fysh, so he can’t even get his own bloody name right, and frankly ‘Contingent Preferential Arrangements’ sounds filthy.
Defeated 422 to 139
And yea verily, there was much rejoicing amidst the Brexiteers and the Tribes of Gammon. All that palaver about letting Parliament have its say and they couldn’t even get it all sorted out after a whole One Day of debate and voting? Pathetic. (Insert gif of God pursing His lips and shaking His head “One Day? You’re having a laugh, sunbeam. That’s at least a fortnight’s work right there.”) OTOH, you might notice that all of the Brexiteer designed motions got absolutely hammered, which kind of shows what Parliament as a body does NOT want to consider. The ones that came closest to reaching a majority were the Customs Union idea and, surprisingly, the Confirmatory Public Vote, either of which could easily achieve a majority with a bit of give and take between their supporters. And don’t discount the chilling effect of May’s offer to fall on her sword if only the Tories and a few Labour turncoats would agree to back her deal. There will have been quite a few Tories on those benches who knew how awful the prospect of crashing out without a negotiated deal of any sort would be, and who would much prefer, at the very least, a considerably ‘softer’ version of Brexit than envisaged in May’s Withdrawal Agreement, but who froze at the prospect of voting for what they could actually live with only to turn around and realise the Prime Minister had managed to bribe, blackmail and bullshit enough of their Tory colleagues to stuff her turd of a deal through the national letterbox. The kind of courage required to do what is right because it’s right, and not because you can get away with it as part of a crowd, is so very rare on the Government benches that if it were ever spotted Trump’s idiot sons would probably organise a safari to shoot it.
Undaunted, the proponents of the indicative votes process pointed out exactly that. It was a process, not an event. The idea was to winnow through and weed out what didn’t work and arrive at a compromise that – could – gain a majority. The next round of votes were scheduled for Monday and all the MPs were released to go and phone their families, find a brothel with mid-week Happy Hour rates or just blather endlessly in front of the BBC’s ever present phalanx of cameras. Nothing important was going to happen in the meantime, was it?
She’s doing WHAT now?
Apparently the little devil on Theresa May’s hunched shoulder had been at it again, because she’d only concocted yet another scheme to get her deal voted down, hadn’t she? And this one was, in the words of goggle-eyed hair-vehicle Russell Brand “A right fakkin peach”. She couldn’t bring her twice-twatted Deal back to Parliament as it was, so, with all the political skill she could muster on short notice (eyeroll) she just Solomoned the bloody thing in two and dumped half of the twitching mess on John Bercow’s desk. You see, the thing we call The Deal actually consists of two parts. The legally binding Withdrawal Agreement that sets out how the UK will leave the EU, how much we’ll pay in back-fees and (crucially) what we’ll agree to keep the Northern Irish border open (the dreaded Backstop), and the non-binding Political Declaration that is supposed to be a guidemap to what the future relationship will be, but is basically just some nice words about how we’ll all stay friends and keep in touch and definitely meet up for a drink at least once a month. Now, legally, and according to Theresa May herself, both parts – had – to be passed by Parliament at the same time, but Theresa ain’t got time for that jibber-jabber no more. Having Parliament vote on just the Withdrawal part of her deal wouldn’t technically be ‘passing’ the deal, so it would be different enough to pass the Speaker’s test for ‘meaningfully different’ but politically it would be just enough to fudge the technicalities and let her claim to have ‘achieved Brexit’, should it pass.
At this point the Grand Wizards of the ERG seem to have realised that the con had gone on as long as it could and they needed to lube-up for a change in direction. They could see from the direction Parliament was going in with its indicative votes that No-Deal, while technically the default position, was not going to be allowed to happen, but all hope was not lost. May’s offer to resign should her truncated Withdrawal Deal pass would leave Number 10 vacant for a Brexiteer to move in after a Tory leadership election, and with the Political Declaration part of the Deal left behind they would be technically free to troll the EU unmercifully and achieve the ‘benefits’ of a No-Deal crash out that way. Their Daily Mail reading acolytes would hate it in the short term, but they would be won back once it was clear that a post-May Tory Party was all-in on the Europhobia and Little Englander paranoia. So Boris, ever the Poundshop Churchill, began chundering on about how he could vote for the Deal as the least worst option, while Jacob Rees-Voldermogg, looking more and more like a carnivorous head sprouting from a dead man’s suit, emerged briefly from a pool of shadow to explain how entirely reasonable it was that he would now be voting in favour of the same Deal he’d been utterly opposed to just that morning.
Unfortunately for them, but entirely predictably, the ERG split down the middle over the sudden acceptability of May’s ‘Vassal State’ betrayal. The true-believer Gammons clenched their fists and blew steamy gusts of outrage from every cherry-red orifice, while their sleeker cousins shrugged languidly and drifted over to the ‘Aye’ side on a gust of cynicism. The DUP did what it was spawned to do and just said “No. No. No.” refusing to even consider shifting its position. The math simply wasn’t there and Theresa May suffered a third humiliating defeat, this time by a ‘mere’ 50+ votes. The momentum, it seemed, had shifted back to Parliament and the moderate majority who just wanted this whole national disaster to end.
Outside Westminster thousands of hardcore Quitters, having already booked their return tickets to the capital years ago to celebrate what they had thought would be ‘Victory Over Europe Day’, had two separate and feuding ‘events’ to shuttle between. Nigel Farage’s ‘March to Leave’ embarrassment, which had seen the newt-lipped propagandist encapsulate his entire cynical career by charging around 200 radicalised flag-humpers £50 each for the privilege of marching with him to London, treating them to a whiny speech full of victimitude and resentment, then buggering off after the first mile when here were no more TV cameras to preen in front of only to reappear for the last mile so that he could ‘lead them’ to Parliament Square. If the numbskulls who took part weren’t such a bunch of conspiracy spouting loons I’d feel sorry for them, almost. The competing ‘Make Brexit Happen’ rally didn’t even try to disguise the reality that it was a full-on Fascist hate-fest. Organised by the now completely alt-Right dominated UKIP and headlined by Stephen Yaxley-Lennon, a moon-faced wannabe yob who masquerades as ‘Lil Hitler for the cosplay Nazi lot under the stage name Tommy Robinson. Drunken violence, arrests, threats chanted at MPs and BBC reporters, all laughingly brushed off by the knobs all safe and sound back in the TV studio as “Strong opinions there on both sides.” instead of the much more accurate “Those stupid fucks are dangerous, why aren’t they being kettled by police and tear-gassed to within an inch of their lives?” Needless to say, the stark contrast with the million + people of all colours, creeds and income brackets who marched peacefully around London a week before went firmly unmentioned on State TV. Wouldn’t want to upset the wrong shade of opinion, after all.
With May driven back to her crypt and the slime of Quitalnacht cleared off the streets, all eyes returned to Parliament for the 2nd round of indicative votes. This time the Speaker did away with even the pretence of pandering to Brexiteer lunacy and chose only the four strongest alternatives to No-Deal, but again things didn’t quite work out as hoped. The Customs Union deal lost by a mere 276 to 273. Common Market 2.0 went down 282 to 261. Confirmatory Referendum lost by 292 to 280. The reworked Revocation or No-Deal motion took the worst beating, losing by 292 to 191. Recriminations and disappointment were heard, with all of the factions opposed to May’s Deal and No-Deal accusing each other of being too precious to just vote for each other’s favourite motions and, as a result, taking the pressure off May, who could now claim that Parliament had had two chances to find a compromise and had failed as badly as her Government. That wouldn’t be anything close to being true, but in politics ‘true’ tends to be whatever enough people are unwilling to call an outright lie.
The inevitable stirrings were heard about yet another Return of the Undead Deal, with May still adamant that if everyone would just do as she told them it would all be fine. A special meeting of the cabinet was called for on Tuesday morning, with the dismal state of Tory Party unity in full display. Phones were confiscated, because no-one could be trusted not to tweet out spoilers to favoured Media outlets or engage in Whatsapp chicanery under the Cabinet table. Hell, they weren’t even allowed a lunchtime stroll because May’s people were sure they’d use the opportunity to plot a coup. Seven hours later, after what I can only imagine to have been a bit like the Red Wedding if everyone involved had known in advance what was going to happen and planned accordingly, the various Sers and Ladies of House Tory staggered into the evening gloom with their mouths uncharacteristically stapled shut. Rumours began to fly, because that’s all our national media is good for these days. May had agreed to hold tight for a No-Deal. She was going to ask the EU for a short extension so the Government could arrange a No-Deal (Seriously? Someone put that under their own byline? – Ed) Mass resignations were imminent.
And then. Bombshell.
Standing small and alone in front of the Press, Theresa May announced that, as the Brexit situation had developed not necessarily to the Conservative Party’s advantage, and while the general trends of the nation had all turned against its interest, her Government would be seeking terms from the Leader of the Opposition. Stunned silence. Journalists with decades of experience sucking up politician’s effluent and decanting it into vials for further study were momentarily baffled. It certainly sounded like the Prime Minister was saying she was open to negotiations with Jeremy Corbyn to find a compromise that could pass the House. She even said that she’d be willing to accept whatever Parliament’s indicative votes process threw up as binding on her Government. Sure, she also said that any compromise had to include passing her Deal, but taken alongside everything else she was saying, and the way she was saying it, that could be put down to a loose connection in the Maybot’s vocal array throwing up a sample of old code. There was no getting around it. After three years and hundreds of hours of stubborn, selfish intransigence and the doomed pursuit of loyalty from her Party’s far-right flank, May was throwing the Brexiteers under a bus and surrendering the future of Brexit to the Labour Party, and Corbyn was graciously going to take her up on her offer.
Yeah, not so fast there, mister. I only look that stupid.
It didn’t take long before people began heeding the warnings from the MP for Mon Calamari that this was clearly a trap. Brexiteer heads were exploding left, right and centre, which was delicious and endlessly entertaining, but you’d expect that regardless of what May’s offer really meant. They’d been her centre of attention for two years, lovingly rewarded with veto points and credibility from the BBC when what they really needed was a jolly good slap across both of their faces, but now she was abandoning them for the beardie Marxist hippy? Of course they’d whine.
The real question was how many of the No-Deal supporting Brexiteers in the Cabinet itself had handed in their resignations? Just one, and a very junior one at that, which raised suspicions that whatever offers May was making to Corbyn, the Ultras in Cabinet weren’t too concerned about having to honour them. It was looking and sounding like May had assured them that any concessions she agreed with Corbyn in order to get her Withdrawal Agreement through would only apply to the Political Declaration part, and once she had stepped down, they could blow that off with no legal problems, leaving Labour to take the blame. It was the original resignation deal with the Boris/Rees-Mogg faction all over again, except this time she was planning to use the Labour Party as a disposable cut-out.
So where are we now? Well, it all depends on how genuine May’s desire is to get some kind of Brexit Deal through Parliament, even if Brexit itself doesn’t get to happen. It also depends on how firmly Corbyn sticks to Labour’s own policy on Brexit. I’ve defended him here quite a bit and I’ve explained why I understand his unwillingness to break Labour apart in order to save the Tory Party from having to make hard decisions. Just getting to this point with the Labour Party in one piece (apart from the vile Tigger slugs – spit) and with the Conservatives falling apart has been a real triumph of Party discipline, especially in this relentlessly negative Media environment, but this is the real test. If Corbyn emerges from negotiations with May with a legally binding agreement to hold a confirmatory vote on any deal they make that includes a Remain option, he’ll deserve a bloody knighthood (that he won’t accept, because he’s a Socialist). If it turns out that it’s all just a play by May to scare Tory hold-outs into backing her Deal on a 4th vote (however that might come about), he has to walk away and call a vote of No-Confidence.
Whatever happens, my head is officially battered. And this is before anything decided goes to the EU for their verdict on whether or not it’s good enough. One thing’s for sure, I definitely picked the wrong week to give up injecting sea-horse glands into my eyeball.
JPL
@Dorothy A. Winsor: ugh Do take care.
tobie
@Omnes Omnibus: I wasn’t criticizing anyone…just noting that doing everything we can to get people to the polls in the face of major obstacles has to be a priority. Geez. Since it’s lost on everyone, my first post was a response to the tweet posted at the top of AL’s diary. I give up when talking about getting people to the polls becomes a source of rancor on this site.
ETA: If I’ve jumped the gun here and gotten defensive unnecessarily, I apologize.
JPL
@Eunicecycle: That is pretty cool. I wonder if she ever mentions that her mom was an excellent role model.
JPL
@Tony Jay: Uh Oh
AnotherBruce
@rikyrah: Ya got to give it to Donald. He goes where no other men go to fuck things up. Hopefully he dines on a dish of pork chop with E Coli.
Omnes Omnibus
@tobie: I was trying to point out that what you were witnessing with Milwaukee may not have been lack of enthusiasm.
Kathleen
@geg6: She is also still on Real Sports, the best news show on TV IMHO.
oatler.
@AnotherBruce: Washed down with a glass of fresh-squeezed origin juice.
bemused
@JPL:
He was loco throughout the whole thing.
tobie
@Omnes Omnibus: The problem is you need mega-voter-enthusiasm to begin to combat all the roadblocks that Republicans have set up to prevent people of color, seniors, students, and the poor from voting. And in off years you have the added complication that it is tough to get the word out about local and state races. I spend three-quarters of my time in a town with 673 residents. There’s lots of open space and you see huge billboards for every local election. Everyone knows when there’s an orphan’s court or a school board race. And most people work locally, are not juggling multiple jobs, and are assured that when they go in to cast their ballot, a machine will be available. Hence voter participation is high. I don’t see how you replicate that in cities.
rikyrah
@Tony Jay:
I hope someone frontpages you again. You have become my go-to voice in trying to understand all this ridiculousness.
Emma
@Tony Jay: Thank you for the actual, real, update. The press is pretty much useless.
Front pagers: move this to the top, STAT!
Amir Khalid
@Tony Jay:
1. A magnificent rant. All meat, no filler. I tip my hat to your comprehensive coverage of the situation and the sheer energy of your indignation.
2. I don’t think I’ve ever seen a national leader flailing as helplessly as May has been doing re Brexit. I’m surprised she hasn’t been no-confidenced out of No 10 already — or I would be, if I weren’t aware that right now no one really wants to be in her place.
Gravenstone
@germy: e coli and listeria for everyone!
Origuy
@Amir Khalid: She’s in all of the Marvel movies that Iron Man is in, playing Tony Stark’s love interest and business partner Pepper Potts.
Kathleen
@Villago Delenda Est: That’s too good for them.
TomatoQueen
On the ground, spreading slowly and steadily, particularly in those states with overt obstacles, needing all the help they can get and in the months I’ve been following them doing the job right is: Spread the Vote, https://www.spreadthevote.org/ , who are doing the work of angels.
Gravenstone
@tobie: Remember that we’re still under the restrictions of the Republican created voter suppression laws here. The need for appropriate photo ID disproportionately affects low income people and those who don’t otherwise need drivers licenses, like those in urban areas. A lot of Milwaukee area votes were never able to be cast as a result of these restrictions.
Dog Mom
@Dorothy A. Winsor: Sorry to hear that you have to deal with medical issues. Keep in mind that the liver has great abilities to regenerate and repair itself. Diet changes and supplements sometimes help resolve many problems. I hope that your doctors can identify what is going on quickly and you can have some peace of mind and a treatment path to go forward.
Eunicecycle
@JPL: Yes, she has! Here is an article where Mayor-Elect Lori is quoted, praising her mom:
Sorry I always screw up links.
tobie
@TomatoQueen: Cool. I’ve bookmarked Spread the Vote. Didn’t know about them until you posted, so thank you!
Gravenstone
@zhena gogolia: They had to give Waukesha a break from the designated bad guy role.
Tony Jay
@rikyrah:
No one really understands this ridiculousness. But it always feels better to have a good old moan about it.
Barbara
@Tony Jay: It’s hard for me to believe that it can actually get worse, but every day, somehow, it manages to get worse. It’s unbelievable.
Tony Jay
@Emma:
You’re very welcome. Plus venting gives me something productive to do at work.
Porky Pine
@Tony Jay: Epic! I printed out the rant because I was starting to go bleary-eyed. It came to 7 pages single-spaced.
Thanks for wringing all the gallows humor out of the fuster-cluck. As the Hapsburgs used to say, “Situation desperate, but not serious.”
Since the English are, Brexit or Remain, a betting nation, what odds are Ladbroke’s offering on the various deals/no-deals?
J R in WV
@Ladyraxterinok:
This is all true, and it was a great novel, if you like mittle European fantasy fiction with strange supernatural things around, as I do. Anything to take my mind off of the strange times we’re living in.
Highly recommended!
Tony Jay
@Amir Khalid:
She really and truly isn’t good at this, but she wanted the job and this… thing is all her own work. Not that it doesn’t tickle me pink that all of the psychos who would otherwise have had the job now find themselves contemplating taking over a Tory Party even more broken down and divided than it was in the 1990s.
But on a more important note, I’d sacrifice every goat I could rustle to bring about a Cardiff win tonight. Given the travesty of their loss to Chelsea at the weekend it would only be fitting that they stick a spoke in the wheels of Big Money City, and purely coincidentally leave the Mighty Reds 2 points clear at the top.
Tony Jay
@Barbara:
We really are gifted every day by the Joy that is Brexit. It’s like syphllis on a national scale.
CaseyL
@Tony Jay:
I ***love*** this. It so beautifully describes what Conservatives are doing to the UK and to the US.
jonas
Marianne Williamson? Le sigh.
Barbara
@Tony Jay: Tertiary syphilis, at that. A rational person (that is, someone other than David Cameron) would address the hyenas in his party screaming to leave the EU by convening a process that would look at the costs and benefits of leaving and lay it out for them, and only then authorize anything like referendum if there was still an appetite for it. Cameron basically bet his house on a coin flip, with no upside and the downside of being kicked out and not having any plan or money for a rental. I mean, really, it is unbelievable, probably the single stupidest and least astute political decision in the post-war western world, and there have been some real doozies to compete for that prize.
Amir Khalid
@Tony Jay:
Amen on the football. Even though I’m no fan of Vincent Tan.
texasdoc
@Tony Jay: Thanks so much for your commentary on this farce of Brexit. This really should be front-paged so more people find it!