• Menu
  • Skip to primary navigation
  • Skip to main content
  • Skip to primary sidebar

Before Header

  • About Us
  • Lexicon
  • Contact Us
  • Our Store
  • ↑
  • ↓
  • ←
  • →

Balloon Juice

Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

We cannot abandon the truth and remain a free nation.

… pundit janitors mopping up after the GOP

Insiders who complain to politico: please report to the white house office of shut the fuck up.

This fight is for everything.

A Senator Walker would be an insult to the state and the nation.

A last alliance of elves and men. also pet photos.

Schmidt just says fuck it, opens a tea shop.

Meanwhile over at truth Social, the former president is busy confessing to crimes.

Since when do we limit our critiques to things we could do better ourselves?

So it was an October Surprise A Day, like an Advent calendar but for crime.

Their freedom requires your slavery.

Damn right I heard that as a threat.

Let us savor the impending downfall of lawless scoundrels who richly deserve the trouble barreling their way.

Do not shrug your shoulders and accept the normalization of untruths.

Why did Dr. Oz lose? well, according to the exit polls, it’s because Fetterman won.

Never entrust democracy to any process that requires republicans to act in good faith.

Too often we hand the biggest microphones to the cynics and the critics who delight in declaring failure.

Today’s GOP: why go just far enough when too far is right there?

“Squeaker” McCarthy

That’s my take and I am available for criticism at this time.

Incompetence, fear, or corruption? why not all three?

rich, arrogant assholes who equate luck with genius

The revolution will be supervised.

Come on, man.

Mobile Menu

  • Winnable House Races
  • Donate with Venmo, Zelle & PayPal
  • Site Feedback
  • War in Ukraine
  • Submit Photos to On the Road
  • Politics
  • On The Road
  • Open Threads
  • Topics
  • Balloon Juice 2023 Pet Calendar (coming soon)
  • COVID-19 Coronavirus
  • Authors
  • About Us
  • Contact Us
  • Lexicon
  • Our Store
  • Politics
  • Open Threads
  • War in Ukraine
  • Garden Chats
  • On The Road
  • 2021-22 Fundraising!
You are here: Home / Open Threads / Late Night Open Thread: Depth of the GOP Field

Late Night Open Thread: Depth of the GOP Field

by Anne Laurie|  April 18, 201912:49 am| 30 Comments

This post is in: Open Threads, Republican Stupidity, Clown car, Ever Get The Feeling You've Been Cheated?

FacebookTweetEmail

Wonderful! Will we see Disney princesses in the new stained glass? https://t.co/al6W7bvFyb

— Ted Cruz (@tedcruz) April 17, 2019

Repubs don’t tell jokes, Ted; Repubs are jokes…

Moore’s tanned, rested and sassy I’m sure. pic.twitter.com/hKYcSxIquG

— Larry Gassan (@larrygassan) April 16, 2019

The only Roy Moore tweet you'll ever need. https://t.co/y8ZRPl0DKN

— Will Saletan (@saletan) April 17, 2019

And finally… Click on the tweets below for the entire extremely NSFW thread:

HOBO COMPOUND: WINDOWSILL PIE WARRIORS https://t.co/jlm600jTsj

— kilgore trout’s mom (@KT_So_It_Goes) April 17, 2019

PROFESSOR HOBO: rule two. no anime

*entire class bolts for door*

PROFESSOR HOBO: *pushes button that drops portcullis* GET BACK HERE YOU COWARDS

*asthmatic coughing fit*

— kilgore trout’s mom (@KT_So_It_Goes) April 17, 2019

FacebookTweetEmail
Previous Post: « A Quick Message Before Tomorrow’s Partial Release of the Mueller Report
Next Post: Thursday Morning Open Thread: Stuff That Doesn’t Sukk »

Reader Interactions

30Comments

  1. 1.

    Jerzy Russian

    April 18, 2019 at 12:59 am

    Looks like I picked the wrong week to stop drinking, smoking, sniffing glue, etc. Is it too early for bed now?

  2. 2.

    plato

    April 18, 2019 at 1:02 am

    New Yorker reveals that the NRA is in a dire financial state, running annual deficits of up to $40,000,000 in recent years while a small group of execs, contractors, and venders have extracted hundreds of millions the NRA's budget.https://t.co/IqEfe8Sf8l— Kyle Griffin (@kylegriffin1) April 18, 2019

    The grifters gotta grift even their own.

  3. 3.

    Peale

    April 18, 2019 at 1:04 am

    Christ almighty. It’s like they watched Bond movies and thought SPECTRE were the good guys. How much do you want to bet that Erik Prince shows up here.

  4. 4.

    Duane

    April 18, 2019 at 1:17 am

    The word depth as applied to republicans doesn’t mean what they think. Their 2016 primary field had depth according to them. If you were searching for the bottom of hell that’s correct.

  5. 5.

    burnspbesq

    April 18, 2019 at 1:27 am

    Wild-ass hour of thunderstorms in central Texas. Tornado watch in effect in and around Florence, about 40 miles NW of Austin.

    This shit will take some getting used to.

  6. 6.

    burnspbesq

    April 18, 2019 at 1:30 am

    @plato:

    If it isn’t nailed down, it’ll be stolen.

  7. 7.

    ?BillinGlendaleCA

    April 18, 2019 at 1:36 am

    @Jerzy Russian:

    Is it too early for bed now?

    Did you pick the wrong week to quit amphetamines?

  8. 8.

    Anne Laurie

    April 18, 2019 at 1:43 am

    @Peale:

    How much do you want to bet that Erik Prince shows up here.

    Heck, I assumed Prince was bankrolling this new grift. Unlike Bannon (who lost his sugar mama, Rebekah Mercer), Prince can fund a little summer-camp side project like Bannon’s Proud Boy Gap Year with the interest on his ex-Blackwater company’s interest.

  9. 9.

    Jerzy Russian

    April 18, 2019 at 1:50 am

    @?BillinGlendaleCA: How could I forget those? Probably all of those other things which I have given up have contributed to my cognitive decline.

  10. 10.

    Jay

    April 18, 2019 at 1:52 am

    @?BillinGlendaleCA:

    He’s on the dried Todd,

    Makes you sleepy.

  11. 11.

    ?BillinGlendaleCA

    April 18, 2019 at 1:54 am

    @Jay: Ah, he and jl.

  12. 12.

    Jerzy Russian

    April 18, 2019 at 1:55 am

    I have determined that it is not too early for bed now. I am having trouble sleeping at work, and the sleep aids prescribed by the doctor are starting to kick in.

  13. 13.

    Comrade Colette Collaboratrice

    April 18, 2019 at 1:55 am

    “… the populist national sovereignty movement is about the reinforcing of the kind of traditional Judeo-Christian West.”

    Judeo-humans everywhere say leave us the fuck out of this, pasty bubble-boy. Next he’s going to be saying that Pope Francis is secretly Jewish. You heard it here first.

  14. 14.

    mrmoshpotato

    April 18, 2019 at 2:05 am

    @plato: SAD!

  15. 15.

    cain

    April 18, 2019 at 3:02 am

    NRA being destroyed by friendly fire. When you sleep with grifters, don’t be surprised if you wake up to an empty room and your sleeping on the floor.

  16. 16.

    cain

    April 18, 2019 at 3:03 am

    I hate dating, I really hating having to be ‘the man’, and pick where to go, and what not.. I like doing the take charge thing when I’m in a leadership role, but not really during my social time. I turn 50 in about 3 weeks, and I’m not even having a birthday party, that’s how lazy I am.

  17. 17.

    Bill

    April 18, 2019 at 3:09 am

    I walked past the Beacon Theater tonight and saw a lot of fools coming out. Then I saw the marquee – “Sold Out – 12 Rules for Life tour – Jordan B. Peterson”

  18. 18.

    prostratedragon

    April 18, 2019 at 4:27 am

    I finally remembered who Barr has been reminding me of. As someone said in the comments,

    How could something so ridiculous be so terrifying?

  19. 19.

    ola azul

    April 18, 2019 at 4:48 am

    @cain:

    I hate dating …

    Ya, hear ya. Me, am a conscientious objector, far’s portentious official stilted “dating” goes. If two peeps agree to go out with open minds and willing hearts to see what might could be and are willing to hazard the emotional consequences, I’m in. Things develop freely, naturally, organically, or — they don’t. Which is OK.

    Kinda look at it like this: If a woman requres going onna official “date”, i.e. with alla artificiality and fakery that generly entails, no thanks. (Not saying it can’t be done, cuz it can — peeps do it! — just that it generly isn’t a successful formula; generly most “dates” entail two peeps acting quite unlike themselves, adhering to dictates to which neither agrees or can sustain.)

    Non-date culture (i.e. declaring who you are rather than deliberately artfully concealing it) is a self-selecting society. I like that. Honesty upfront. All or nothing. (Which does not preclude, necessarily, hooking up; some peeps actually appreciate honesty and like to fuck anyway. Go figure.)

    Got no interest in me (or her!) tryn’ta fake it till you, me, we make it. Life is short. Say who you are and take your chances.

    Will say: After my wife was killt inna car crash 14 year back, went a little crazy for a coupla years, then started looking (life goes on or you give up). As I creep into my dotage, find it’s easy enough to hook up, but *very* hard to find one’s simpatico. Mostly, I expect I’m at fault for this (as with most things, alas). When you’re with someone new, you getta sense, purty fucking quick, of whether you wanna spend your life with them, and, guided by the hoary hand of time and experience, you kinda know whether it’s gonna work. Have sorta likened it to the process of reduction in making maple syrup, boiling things down to their essence.

    Expect when you’ve made enough mistakes, patterns become clearer.

  20. 20.

    OzarkHillbilly

    April 18, 2019 at 5:05 am

    “Joey? Do you like movies about gladiators?”

    -Steve Bannon

  21. 21.

    ola azul

    April 18, 2019 at 5:10 am

    String onna Stick:

    Not sure if you’ll see this, but:

    Wanted to thank you for your rec on Dollhouse Thieves. Sounds glorious. Always loves me some serendipitous shooting stars.

    Putta request in at the library to try’n track some down Dollhousian jams, but no go (done a search on the library web site and din’t nothing come up, but our library folk — who I loves — is *very* good at bloodhounding all sorta esoterica, so am hopeful).

    How’s yer bionic-knee convalescence, btw? ‘Member you being pushed back to work a lil’ earlier than was optimal. Was hoping you reclaimt the mountain goat as yer spirit animal.

  22. 22.

    Jeffro

    April 18, 2019 at 6:23 am

    That thread made my week ?

  23. 23.

    Kobekid

    April 18, 2019 at 8:03 am

    @Bill: Brick oven Bill?

  24. 24.

    Denali

    April 18, 2019 at 8:45 am

    @Jerzy Russian,

    Do they pay you to sleep at work?

  25. 25.

    Jerzy Russian

    April 18, 2019 at 8:55 am

    @Denali: Technically no. That is the joke I tell my students or the one I tell at meetings if I had a rough night. I get fitted for a CPAP mask next week so hopefully I can start to retire that joke.

  26. 26.

    Cacti

    April 18, 2019 at 9:10 am

    @Comrade Colette Collaboratrice:

    Judeo-humans everywhere say leave us the fuck out of this, pasty bubble-boy. Next he’s going to be saying that Pope Francis is secretly Jewish. You heard it here first.

    Funny thing about those pushing “Judeo-Christian” heritage is that they never seem to be lamenting a lack of Jews or Judaism in the public sphere. Quite the opposite most of the time.

  27. 27.

    Citizen Alan

    April 18, 2019 at 10:13 am

    @Cacti:

    That’s because the “Judeo” in “Judeo-Christian” refers to Jews for Jesus. I’m not kidding about that. Evangelical eschatology states that exactly 144,000 Jews will convert to Christianity post-Rapture and all the rest will be personally exterminated by Jesus Christ upon his return … and this is presented as a good thing.

  28. 28.

    J R in WV

    April 18, 2019 at 12:00 pm

    @Citizen Alan:

    There was lots of genocidal mania in the Old Testament, mostly either committed by gawd hisself or by his chosen people at his command. All that was in theory replaced in the period 15-35 AD by the newest messenger from gawd, who was supposed to bring peace and love thy neighbors. Somehow that didn’t work out quite like that.

    Regarding the original post, the Republican Talent Pool mostly closely resembles one of the Smithfield Farms hog waste ponds in North Carolina, you know, one of those vast ponds of poison spread all around the countryside every time there’s a tropical storm that hist the East Coast. Not too deep, but equally toxic all over the pool.

  29. 29.

    Mart

    April 18, 2019 at 12:29 pm

    Hugo and Jake, two young atheists reviewing Steve Cannons “Torchbearer” starring the old Duck Dynasty bigot is awesome: https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=CDSUenjSq8U

    I really cannot stand how awful and mainstream Ban non is.

  30. 30.

    Dev Null

    April 18, 2019 at 1:28 pm

    There’s gotta be a meme around here somewhere [empties waste basket on floor] …

    The Long Con becomes expensive?

    The Revolution is eating its, uh, guns?

    Hmm, the Urban dictionary has a definition for this, which also works.

    So many cons; so few lions?

    Conservatives rifling the NRA?

Comments are closed.

Primary Sidebar

🎈Keep Balloon Juice Ad Free

Become a Balloon Juice Patreon
Donate with Venmo, Zelle or PayPal

2023 Pet Calendars

Pet Calendar Preview: A
Pet Calendar Preview: B

*Calendars can not be ordered until Cafe Press gets their calendar paper in.

Recent Comments

  • mrmoshpotato on TGIFriday Morning Open Thread: Busy, Busy, Busy (Jan 27, 2023 @ 1:34pm)
  • eclare on TGIFriday Morning Open Thread: Busy, Busy, Busy (Jan 27, 2023 @ 1:34pm)
  • MisterDancer on TGIFriday Morning Open Thread: Busy, Busy, Busy (Jan 27, 2023 @ 1:32pm)
  • eclare on TGIFriday Morning Open Thread: Busy, Busy, Busy (Jan 27, 2023 @ 1:31pm)
  • MisterDancer on TGIFriday Morning Open Thread: Busy, Busy, Busy (Jan 27, 2023 @ 1:28pm)

Balloon Juice Posts

View by Topic
View by Author
View by Month & Year
View by Past Author

Featuring

Medium Cool
Artists in Our Midst
Authors in Our Midst
We All Need A Little Kindness
Favorite Dogs & Cats
Classified Documents: A Primer

Calling All Jackals

Site Feedback
Nominate a Rotating Tag
Submit Photos to On the Road
Balloon Juice Mailing List Signup

Front-pager Twitter

John Cole
DougJ (aka NYT Pitchbot)
Betty Cracker
Tom Levenson
TaMara
David Anderson
ActualCitizensUnited

Shop Amazon via this link to support Balloon Juice   

Join the Fight!

Join the Fight Signup Form
All Join the Fight Posts

Balloon Juice Events

5/14  The Apocalypse
5/20  Home Away from Home
5/29  We’re Back, Baby
7/21  Merging!

Balloon Juice for Ukraine

Donate

Site Footer

Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

  • Facebook
  • RSS
  • Twitter
  • YouTube
  • Comment Policy
  • Our Authors
  • Blogroll
  • Our Artists
  • Privacy Policy

Copyright © 2023 Dev Balloon Juice · All Rights Reserved · Powered by BizBudding Inc

Share this ArticleLike this article? Email it to a friend!

Email sent!