Also, feral chickens are tormenting England. (h/t Dorothy Winsor)
Jersey is being terrorised by hordes of feral chickens, which have been waking up locals, damaging gardens and even chasing joggers.
Residents have been making complaints about the birds, which have also become a traffic hazard. Two small culls have been carried out, but they continue to cause chaos, the Environment Minister has admitted.
It is believed the chickens were once pets which were abandoned, before rapidly breeding. They now roam the British island in 100-strong groups.
It looks like you’ve been abandoned today! Here’s a nice fresh open thread, which will now be followed by a flurry of open threads.
Have at it.
Baud
Affectionately known as Chris Christies.
HumboldtBlue
Gangs of feral chickens in a country where Nandos rules the fast food landscape, I see a battle royale coming up!
Amir Khalid
@Baud:
On his next British tour, Bruce should play a show on the Isle of Jersey. Think of the headlines, man:
JaySinWA
There’s a stone cold cat joke in here somewhere.
Nora
That feral chickens story sounds like something out of Monty Python.
sukabi
Sounds like a good reason for a community fried chicken dinner.
evap
Speaking of feral birds, a dog was killed by a swan in a park in Dublin:
Wakeshift
At last we learn the provenance of Brave Sir Robin’s sigil
Edit: scooped by Nora
evap
here’s the link: Dog kill by a swan
Baud
Worst West Side Story remake ever.
Plato
Are Jerseyans chickenshits?
John Revolta
When you find yourself in danger
When you’re threatened by a stranger
When it looks like you will take a lickin’
There is someone waiting who
Will hurry up and rescue you
Just caaalllll for SuperChicken!!
tam1MI
Bill Maher has some thoughts on how to cull the Democratic Presidential filed:
https://twitter.com/RealTimers/status/1144821916156383232?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw%7Ctwcamp%5Etweetembed%7Ctwterm%5E1144821916156383232&ref_url=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.mediaite.com%2Ftv%2Fbill-maher-lists-10-dem-candidates-who-should-leave-the-race-now%2F
That bit about Kristin Gillibrand… Ouch.
Immanentize
Feral chickens? Welcome to our 50th State!
Jim Parish
@evap: Cf. also one of my favorite Yeats poems: Leda and the Swan. The first half of the last verse gives me the shivers.
David ??Merry Christmas?? Koch
Feral chickens terrorize China.
World wide, everyone says General Tso’s chicken
Nora
@John Revolta: Wasn’t it “squawk” for SuperChicken? That’s how I always heard it.
Formerly disgruntled in Oregon
@tam1MI: Like I want to hear what that smug, racist, misogynistic asshole’s judgements of our candidates are.
No offense. But seriously, fuck Bill Maher.
RepubAnon
Sounds like an homage to Weird Al’s song “Psycho Chicken” (sung to Talking Heads’ Psycho Killer).
tam1MI
Ooops, should have been Kirsten…
RepubAnon
@John Revolta: “You knew the job was dangerous when you took it, Fred!”
MisterForkbeard
In generally uninteresting news, John Scalzi has weighed in on the Primary and I find we’re pretty close in preferences:
https://whatever.scalzi.com/2019/06/29/hey-scalzi-who-would-you-vote-for-as-the-democratic-candidate-if-you-had-to-vote-right-now/
Kamala, then Warren. Then a bunch of other people, then Bernie. Then a bunch more people and then Tulsi.
The Pale Scot
I’m surprised that a Golden Eagle hasn’t shown up. Eagles are a problem for free range chicken farms
An Organic Chicken Farm in Georgia Has Become an Endless Buffet for Bald Eagles
It’s England, eventually a pigeon eating gull might show up and try the menu
mrmoshpotato
@Formerly disgruntled in Oregon:
Seconded. Talk shit about the most qualified candidate for President since at least LBJ, and you can fuck off forever.
westyny
@MisterForkbeard: On some alternate timeline it’s come down to Tulsi or Woo Lady.
mrmoshpotato
The chickens are pissed off about the beating the Red Sox are taking.
Twenty-five minutes until real baseball. Go Cubs!
Anonymous at Work
@David ??Merry Christmas?? Koch: General Tso would be routed by Colonel Sanders….
Raven
I just talked to my buddy in Berkeley. His wife is a lawyer there and does a ton of progressive work. She hates Harris but he thinks she’ll come around if it’s the only way to win.
Raven
In other news we just booked an incredible fishing trip in Louisiana for my retirement gig in September!!!!
donnah
On an different note, Trump has co-opted the Lincoln Memorial for his own Fourth of July celebration, or campaign rally, whatever.
https://www.washingtonpost.com/local/public-safety/trump-plans-ticketed-access-area-for-vips-friends-and-family-at-july-4-celebration/2019/06/28/005fd56a-99a4-11e9-8d0a-5edd7e2025b1_story.html?noredirect=on&utm_term=.f76ff8b3e0c5
We knew it would happen. but it still pisses me off.
Skepticat
When I lived on Boston’s North Shore, we had large (as many as forty-five or fifty) flocks of wild turkeys that were real … well, turkeys. They used to chase cars, pecking at the chrome and mirrors, and they’d chase anyone who walked along the road, squawking like mad the whole time. It probably was mating season, but they could be nasty. We have fewer and calmer versions on the island in Maine, and I’m looking forward to seeing them again soon.
oatler.
@RepubAnon: Psycho chicken (WHAT THE FUCK?)
buk buk buk buk buk buk buk
He’s got a grudge against Frank Perdue!
I always thought that was by the As
mrmoshpotato
@The Pale Scot: Holy hell. That gull documentary is something.
Seems like it would be easier to steal sandwiches from picnicking hoomans. Also – the pigeons need to band together. Peck the bastard within inches of its life.
JPL
@donnah: If there is an uproar, they will give a few seats to members of the military.
trollhattan
@MisterForkbeard:
He-he-ha, at #13:
Mary G
@MisterForkbeard: Tulsi’s not dead last:
Personally, I’d still crawl over the broken glass to vote for her, cuz Twitler. But glad she’s not winning people over. It would be a nightmare to have Hillary Clinton lose to a con man and then see the idiots elect a con woman.
Melusine
Since it’s an open thread, how about Veep picks?
Warren and Harris have both become such strong figures I don’t know if either would want to be VP, or prefer to remain as Queen of the Senate/AG/Sec Ed/CFPB/Czarina of Kicking Wall Street’s Ass.
Personally, I’d love to see Stacey Abrams on the ticket. I know she said she wasn’t interested in being #2, but I think that was in reference to Biden/Sanders.
She’s charismatic, she knows how to get things done, and Goddess forbid if something happened (and age isn’t the only factor – stroke, heart attack, cancer, evil fuckers can strike without warning), then she’s intelligent enough to know what she doesn’t know and wise enough to make sure she has someone experienced backing her up.
Plus she’s be great at reassuring the nation in a crisis. Can you imagine Bernie trying to comfort-shout people after another Sandy Hook?? He’d double the PTSD.
So currently my picks would be…
1) Stacey Abrams
2) Julian Castro
3) Mayor Pete/Amy Klobuchar (but you’d have to give staff lots of extra personal days and free muffins)
Baud
@trollhattan:
Honorary Juicer there.
debbie
@HumboldtBlue:
It sounds like a real Situation.
debbie
@Nora:
I always heard, “Pluck, pluck, pluck, pluck, pluck, pluck, pluck.”
Oddly, I sang this very tune at someone at work last week.
MisterForkbeard
@trollhattan: I’ll admit that Scalzi nearly exactly nails how I feel about Bernie, but particularly mentions his more zealous supporters. I approve.
MomSense
@Immanentize:
More like my new band name.
schrodingers_cat
@tam1MI: And I should care what the misogynist racist fuck says because?
John Revolta
@RepubAnon: “I can see them now, with my super vision!”
“Gee, I wish I had super vision!”
“Well gosh, I do the best I can for you, Fred…”
Redshift
@Mary G: Trump is such an incompetent that a woo lady like Williamson can successfully do what he failed at – run for president to promote her personal brand.
JPL
@Melusine: If the top is a male, then the VP has to be a female. imo. Castro would be a good pick for any female at the top.
OzarkHillbilly
“What’s for dinner?”
“Chicken.”
“Again??!??!”
“Well, I was gonna make a nice eggplant parmigiana, but this bastard beat us to it.”
“Chicken sounds great.”
Immanentize
@Redshift:
Woo lady won me over with her closing. Not for President!!
But as, perhaps, the voice to replace Siri?
Redshift
@Formerly disgruntled in Oregon: Hear, hear. I happened to hear his closing bit last night. (Ms. Redshift still watches the opening and closing, but even she admits he’s pretty much devolved into “old man yells at cloud.”)
He talked about space exploration, and apparently thought “why don’t we spend that money fixing things down here instead” was fresh and original, rather than literally a fifty year old whine. Feh.
Immanentize
@OzarkHillbilly: my friend in San Antonio grew up on a chicken farm in Texas City. That man hated chickens. Hated how awful his chicken raising childhood was. We were out at a Thai restaurant and he got his usual cashew chicken. I asked given his childhood, if he hated chickens so much, how could he stand to eat any. And he said, every meal is another dead chicken.
NotMax
Breggsit?
mrmoshpotato
“Hello Dallas-area pizzeria. Will you deliver to Chicago?” Crazy-ass ads.
Immanentize
@mrmoshpotato:
That add is about delivering underage children for sex, libtard!!!!!
Tenar Arha
@TaMara This photo tweet is way too hilarious; I’m sharing it.
“it’s called style, Cynthia, you wouldn’t understand”
mrmoshpotato
@Immanentize:
Haha. You don’t want Wilmer shouting driving directions at you and telling you about the greatness of the Soviet Union through your iPhone?
NotMax
@mrmoshpotato
Wasn’t it Hawkeye Pierce who connived to have a delivery from a Chicago BBQ joint delivered to Korea in M*A*S*H?
;)
debbie
mrmoshpotato
@NotMax: Don’t know. M*A*S*H was ummmm…..hehehe.
Raven
@mrmoshpotato: The idea that there was something funny about the Korean War never quite resonated with me.
mrmoshpotato
@Raven: Check the air dates of the show. ?
chopper
@Baud:
“cause every chicken’s a lousy puerto rican” doesn’t quite have the ring of the original but it can work.
?BillinGlendaleCA
@NotMax:
(Looks @ NotMax and shakes head).
satby
@NotMax: yes! Great episode!
But poor Hawkeye never got to eat them.
Immanentize
@Raven:
C’mon. Gen. MacArthur was a figgin’ laugh a friggin’ minute:
OzarkHillbilly
@Immanentize: I sympathize. They are dirty, nasty, mean little critters. They are also quite tasty and they give free breakfasts every day. So we compromised. They get to live like kings and I get all the eggs and roasted chicken I want.
Baud
@Raven:
I’m still bitter about Hogan’s Heroes.
satby
@Raven: the war was never the vehicle for humor, the army bureaucracy and people’s personalities were where the humor was mined. It was pretty subversive for its time.
Melusine
@JPL: I”m assuming/hoping it will come down to a choice between Warren and Harris for the nominee. (fingers crossed, mutters quick approximation of Hail Mary, throws salt over left shoulder)
Booker might be worth it just for the opportunities for epic side-eye moments to liven up dull press conferences. He and Michelle Obama could have an “Uh-Huh”-Off for charity on Ellen.
Michelle would win, of course. NOBODY can cast ocular shade like she can. Except maybe Prince, but I don’t think Marianne is up to channeling him.
raven
@Immanentize: My old man was in his “Jungle Navy” and hated him. Do you know he never spent a night in Korea during the war? He’d fly back to his palace in Japan.
Immanentize
@Baud:
Mad Magazine was always too smart for the kids:
Hochman’s Heroes
satby
@OzarkHillbilly: oh, hey! Replying to your comment this morning, yes I have a fan. And I was planted in front of it the whole day. It was only about 84°, but full sun and metal building makes for quite a bit hotter temps inside.
Immanentize
@raven:
No, I did not know that. But my Dad, who got out in ’46 and did not go back, hated MacArthur for what he did in Korea. I suspect your Dad was a difficult father at times, but his instincts seem true. Fuck MacArthur.
RAVEN
@Immanentize: Read “The Coldest WInter” by Halberstam?
?BillinGlendaleCA
@Immanentize: My dad who also got out in ’46 felt the same. He always though McArthur to be a showboat.
Immanentize
@Melusine: You make a good point (sideways). If Harris is the winner of the primary, Barak, Obama, Holder, Rice and everyone else on the team will be in it, full time, 24/7 to help her win.
Probably true of many of the others.
NotMax
@satby
Never occurred to me before that with all the hype of “Send a salami to your boy in the army” am hard pressed to come up with a single instance in any film or show about WW2 which showed a soldier receiving or consuming same.
Immanentize
@RAVEN: no, but I will if you recommend….
Immanentize
@Immanentize: odd, can’t edit. I meant to include Michele….
?BillinGlendaleCA
@Immanentize: I couldn’t edit either, FYWP.
NotMax
Some of the above led to finding an interesting synopsis about delicatessen and WW2.
OzarkHillbilly
Jess Dweck
@TheDweck
·
6m
Both sides are the same.
raven
@Immanentize: I loved it but he’s always been a favorite.
OzarkHillbilly
@RAVEN: It’s sitting on my desk right here. I have to admit I’m a little intimidated by the size of it, but it’s next.
Raven
@OzarkHillbilly: Cool!
mrmoshpotato
@OzarkHillbilly:
How do the chickens roast themselves? Is Jeff Ross a chicken in a human suit? ?
Melusine
@OzarkHillbilly: I snorted water all over my screen.
Then I cried.
Horribly, horribly true.
OzarkHillbilly
@NotMax: During WWII my old man had 2 sisters who worked in a cannery. His care package arrivals were the cause of week long celebrations by his bomber crew. Everything came canned. Salamis and polish sausage and hams, crackers, home made bread, and layer cakes (icing separately canned), dill pickles, pickled onions, pickled okra, pickled pike, everything came canned and almost as fresh as the day it came out of the oven or out of the smoker.
LuciaMia
Guess theres a chicken in every pot now in Jersey.
NotMax
@OzarkHillbilly
For which he owed a nod to the French. A Brief History of Canned Food.
Steve in the ATL
@NotMax: Adam’s Rib
Raven
Has anyone watched “Gentleman Jack”? It’s really good and the fact that Anne Lister wrote abut her lesbianism in code is fascinating.
JPL
Until my grandson is six months old, I have been doing the Nanny stuff MWF. I wanted one day where I could forget about the Wheels on the Bus, but no trump has to manage to ruin that, too.
NotMax
@OzarkHillbilly
Kind of related: Sampling Boer War canned meat rations, in 2018.
joel hanes
@Melusine:
how about Veep picks?
Small-bore job perfect for a small-bore politician.
Biden would be fine.
SiubhanDuinne
@satby:
You have lots of fans, satby.
JPL
@joel hanes: He’d excel at that. Just for laughs, Hillary would be fine also. Trump would sweat off his fake tan.
mrmoshpotato
@NotMax: Ozark’s dad was eating food that was recently canned. :)
Alternative Fax, a hip hop artist from Idaho
@SiubhanDuinne:
I’m one!
joel hanes
@Immanentize:
grew up on a chicken farm
When I Set My Chickens Free
David ??Merry Christmas?? Koch
In a pitchers duel, Yankees beat Red Sox 17-13 in London
JPL
@David ??Merry Christmas?? Koch: I hate the Yankees but wanted that game to end.
mrmoshpotato
In other baseball news, Baez just unloaded the bases with a grand slam. 5-0 Cubs in Cincinnati.
David ??Merry Christmas?? Koch
@mrmoshpotato: Joan Baez still a clutch hitter after all these years.
seefleur
@Skepticat: I’m in the close-to-Downeast area, and the turkeys here are scary stupid/vicious. They’ll take on a car with no regard for safety or windshields. Only thing worse is my neighbor’s guinea hens. If you’re on an island, I hope that everyone there is okay with keeping the turkey population under control! at one point years back, Swans Island had a really bad run of dealing with deer that got out of control population-wise.
Steeplejack
@Tenar Arha:
Fixed link: “It’s called style, Cynthia!”
eldorado
someone needs to give that adorable murder floof a home
Matt McIrvin
@MisterForkbeard: Mine right now is Warren, then Harris by a microscopic margin. After them, a gap. Booker, Castro, Gillibrand, a bunch of other people I guess.
Biden is near the bottom just below Bernie Sanders and above the total cranks like Williamson and Gabbard. All of them are preferable to Trump, all of them.
Matt McIrvin
(I have a good friend who supports Booker and REALLY FUCKING HATES Warren and another one who supports Warren and REALLY FUCKING HATES Harris, so this campaign is going to be fun if either of my favorites gets nominated. I think we all hate Joe Biden so maybe I should hope he gets nominated for comity.)
HumboldtBlue
@The Pale Scot:
Simply fascinating, thanks for that link on the eagles and chickens.
Ruckus
@Melusine:
Abrams was actually my first pick as well, but as she isn’t running I’m going with Harris, then Warren, then I’m waiting to be inspired. I’d really like to see Warren as senate majority leader, her plans are for legislation to get things done. We need that almost more than we need to get shit for brains out of the WH. So if Harris gets it and Warren stays in the senate Abrams would IMO be a great VP and in 8 yrs be ready to relieve Harris as pres.
A boy can dream.
THe Pale Scot
@mrmoshpotato: That gull doesn’t cut corners on his diet, no Freedom Fries for him. Willing to kill for high protein raw meat
Ruckus
@Raven:
@satby:
Raven, satby is right, it wasn’t actually about the war or the country it happened in. I was in the Navy, stationed at Great Lakes for school, when Mash was being shown and the lifers were very upset about it being shown at the base theater. The base commander said “Fuck it, it’s about the army, not the navy and so it played. The lifers that went to see it were mostly pissed the entire movie for all the hits the army took. Everyone not a lifer thought it was great because really the navy wasn’t any different than the army, after all a lifer is a lifer is a lifer……..
Ruckus
@joel hanes:
He was fine 10 yrs ago. And I’d bet he’s not dropping out till it’s apparent from Mars that he’s not going to win. IOW he’s going to pull a BS. Undoubtably not anywhere near as bad as that, but still noticeable. In his mind it’s finally his turn. I don’t think he’d be fine with any woman as president that he lost the primary to. And our best candidates are women, Harris and Warren.
Ken
Just how feral do chickens get? Could they drive humans from Jersey, much as feral hogs have taken over large parts of Texas?
Origuy
114 comments and no pedant pointed out that Jersey is not part of England? It’s not even really part of the UK. It’s a British Crown Dependency.
SectionH
@Origuy: Completely late, but I read a lot of the posts earlier, and wth – yeah, Jersey is a British Crown Dependency. But what’s cool to me is that Jersey and Guernsey are the remnants of the Duchy of Normandy, and E2 rules there as the Duchess of Normandy – not anything else. (I’ve never made it to Guernsey, but have been to Jersey thrice. Lovely island – scenery, old castles, some incredible pottery, and it’s off-shore banking territory, so many restaurants catering to ppl with too much money to spend, but bargain prices compared to London. But also the Jersey Wildlife Preservation Trust.)
What I was actually amazed by about this thread was we got through all these comments and no one mentioned Kauai and wild chickens. Because damn. They’re everywhere on the island. I never saw more than a few dozen at one time, and they were spread out over a lot of space, but still. You drive out of LIH and there are chickens…
SectionH
@Ken: Um, no. Don’t be silly.
@The Pale Scot: all the gulls around here seem to be wimps. The pigeons drove the gulls off the Fishing Pier, ffs. The City poisoned the poor pigeons… sigh. I like pigeons, unlike most people, apparently. I get all the complaints, but they’re just very well adapted birds.
At least we’ve got brown pelicans (aka actual flying dinosaurs) on the pier to keep most of the birds in line. I’m glad to see a few “assertive” gulls. There’s one female gull who seems to negotiate with a brown pelican (probably female too) around the little boat dock. Fairly clearly over sharing the territory, but so far so good.
Zinsky
Free chicken nuggets for everyone!