Not the Onion:
Secret Service wants jet skis to protect Trumps: "The first family is very active in water sports" https://t.co/MFuTJWAOEr
— Newsweek (@Newsweek) September 16, 2019
Proximate excuse cause:
New: Alt-right grifter Jacob Wohl and all-but-admitted white nationalist Nick Fuentes are planning a “free speech” rally on some sort of yacht in Miami next week: https://t.co/hE0dVqfnwW
— Jerry Iannelli (@jerryiannelli) September 16, 2019
A veritable who’s who of right-wing con artists, alt-right media hounds, and outright racists apparently plan to hold some sort of Art Basel for Grifters conference in Miami this month. An avalanche of some of the worst pundits online — including at least one fascist — say they’ll hold a “Demand Free Speech” rally Saturday, September 28, on an undisclosed yacht somewhere in the Magic City.
The event’s top billing? Serial con artist Jacob Wohl, who is charged in California with a felony for unlawfully selling investments in a company called Montgomery Assets, will apparently debate Nick Fuentes, a self-described “American nationalist” who has appeared on white-nationalist programs and at one point was recorded going on an anti-Semitic rant about a fellow conservative blogger by calling him a “race traitor” and saying he “worked for Jews.” It’s unclear what Wohl and Fuentes might actually debate, but the event seems designed more to generate protests and controversy than to conduct intellectual discussions…
… [T]ickets are being sold on the website 1776.shop, which is run by Enrique Tarrio, a Miami native who leads the neofascist Proud Boys group. “Early-bird” VIP tickets cost $150 for whatever reason. Among the other guests, the group says Zoe Sozo, an ambassador for the campus conservative group Turning Point USA, will also attend…
My personal bet would be that these clowns haven’t so much as charted a boat — once enough ‘VIP tickets’ have been sold, they’ll announce that ‘the (((globalists))) have forced us to reschedule to an as-yet-to-be-determined date, for the safety of our supporters’. And as proof: Secret Service agents on jetskies!
I really hope during the general election debate, when the moderator asks the Democratic nominee to say one nice thing about Trump, that person responds with, “how active his family is in water sports.” https://t.co/FGMjb693Yw
— Daniel W. Drezner (@dandrezner) September 16, 2019
BlueDWarrior
The headlines write themselves… I guess…
NotMax
And we’ve come full circle back to the pee tape.
;)
The Lodger
Florida and the Hamptons, yet no mention of Moscow..
RedDirtGirl
Blech
NotMax
50 Shades of Bray.
Elizabelle
A fresh thread. Thank you very much.
@NotMax:
Laughing. Although, that is accurate.
Jeffro
I think jet skis to help the Secret Service out are fine, as long as we actually see trumpov or one of the traitor tots out there swimming, snorkeling, scuba diving…anything that potentially ups their chances of being caught in a rip current or serving as some toothy predator’s lunch.
Deal, GOP?
Keith P.
They’re really dancing around the fact that Donald Trump will not go anywhere near the fucking water.
ThresherK
In a better world I’m imagining John Kerry windsurfing with a half dozen black-suited sunglasses-wearing inconspicuous SecSvc agents on six windsurfboards around him.
mrmoshpotato
Shouldn’t that be “including at least all fascists”?
Elizabelle
@Keith P.: I hope the water will come to him.
We still got a few weeks of Hurricane Season left.
Gelfling 545
So, on the home front, tomorrow an exterminator is coming – at a no small price- to get the yellow jackets out of the overhang so that the guys who were supposed to replace the trim in the spring (pre-yellow jackets) & couldn’t because of nesting birds can come & finish that. The wild life has it in for me.
Sigh.
Mary G
Donald Trump wouldn’t touch water because his hair would dissolve.
Spanky
Maybe “the first family” means Barron, although I don’t know which “water sports” that would be.
Unless he takes after his old man.
Ohio Mom
I remember seeing photos of the Obama family playing in the waves on vacation and somehow the Secret Service managed to do their job without jet skis. And we know the Service prohibited certain water sports, we all remember when post-presidency, Obama got to go wind-surfing. Who could forget that photo of the ear-to-ear grin?
Meanwhile, I am having trouble imagining the (to their minds) perfectly coifed and made-up Trumps getting in the water, being playful, and mussing up their hairdos.
Wag
@NotMax:
I’m hoping for wetsuits and dildos, myself…
Brachiator
Would it be unkind to pray for a capsizing, with all hands lost?
Wag
@Brachiator:
No. It would be merciful.
??? Goku (aka Amerikan Baka) ??
@Brachiator:
You sound like TenguPhule. Not that there’s anything wrong with that ; )
ola azul
@Gelfling 545:
Hope you’ll forgive me if I’ve got this wrong, but my recollection is you have a son who is an aficionado of sharp knives?
If ya, am wondering if he has a source/fount of info on how this small miracle is accomplished?
Am a commercial fisherman, can sharpen knives (with stones) adequately, but they need frequent maintenance. Wondering if there’sa silver bullet that’ll last longer’n what I know.
Ohio Mom
@Spanky: Rumor has it that Barron lives with his grandparents in suburban Potomac, Maryland. Pretty far from the Florida beaches.
Elizabelle
@Ohio Mom: I am guessing that is the case. And thank Dog for that. Barron deserves to be out of that maelstrom.
Especially since he’s “Melania’s son.”
Elizabelle
@Brachiator: As long as the crew can escape. Unless they’re asshats too. Then: no mercy for them.
dnfree
So they can’t spell Mar-a-Lago after all this time?
philpm
More likely, the judge in Wohl’s case will find out he’s leaving the state and put the kibosh on him attending. And there will be no refunds.
SFAW
And I am hoping for “You don’t sweat much, for a fat man.”
TS (the original)
But Obama had a vacation – and wore a tan suit – and his children went to school – so what’s a few jet skis between friends.
kindness
I don’t ever want to hear any whining from Republicans about Democratic budgets or what we spend money on.
Jay
@ola azul:
Start with good steel, then diamond stones. Have a bunch of knives with edges tailored to the work, ( fatter angles for chopping, narrower angles for sliceing), and then keep them sharp. I swipe 3/2/1 over a diamond stone before every use, that way I never have to “repair” a worn edge. Always cut on a soft surface, no glass cutting boards.
ola azul
@Jay:
All cutting is gills n guts. Purty soft.
‘Member when John C. put up his thread ’bout stabbing hisself tryn’ta cut a watermelon.. ‘Member thinking to myself: “Good Lord, keep that clumsy good-hearted lug offa my boat!” If you can puncture yerself with a knife on the flat still earth, I’d hate to see what’s possible try’nta dress a coho onna pitching ocean in 10-foot seas.
?BillinGlendaleCA
@Wag:
(The safe word is “Green Balloons”.)
TS (the original)
@kindness:
But you know you will – as soon as there is a democrat in the White House. They have to budget to pay for all those tax cuts.
Jay
I use shears for gills, ( Heinkel) because you are cutting through the bone attachments, front and back,
And a drop point knife for gutting and removing the blood sack, because it allows opening up the belly, with out nicking the gut or other organs. I also eat the liver, cheeks, brain, heart, eggs and miltsacks. Great scrambled with eggs on a good toasted bagel with onions and cream cheese.
ola azul
@Jay:
Funny you say. I routinely horrify my intermittent deckhands (male and female) by rinsing off the beating hearts of fresh-cleant salmons and eating ’em like artcihokes. Taste like liver. Which I likes, inordinately. Specially blacktail deer.
Will say: the rest of the guts I try’n provide intact for the seagulls for one very specific reason: seagulls is gotta habit of standing atop both wayward logs and kelp islands. Whenever I sees ’em denote this particular hazard, I sez: “Thanky, sailor!” (Based loosely on the belief that seagulls is the incarnations of dead seamen who give warning as warranted.)
Amir Khalid
I remember that the Obamas knew not to make the kind of absurd and excessive demands on the Secret Service that made it burn through its annual budget allocation by the middle of the year, which the Trumps did in 2017.
Jay
@ola azul:
Yeah, coming back one night, heard the gulls calling. Had mis-DR’d my position by half a kilo and was on track to hit the reefs and rocks.
Saved my ass they did.
Wire cutters would probably work beaut on gills with no sharpening needed.
ola azul
@Jay:
No doubt. Matter a expediency, tho. Goal is to dress a salmon (with pressure bleeding) in not much more’n 30 seconds. It’s like hog-tying, just w/o the ego. You wanna achieve production-line efficiency. When you’re onnem, you wanna pick ’em up n puttem down. When you got more’n one manner of dressing a fish, you add complication.
It’d work, will concede freely. It’d just complicate matters to have a second implement.
Jay
@ola azul:
You stack them on a board with slots.
In trimming a tenon, I use up to 18 different chisels. They get laid out like surgical instruments. Just takes a different muscle memory. Stabbing a gutting knife into the gill anchors, isn’t as fast as changing the knife and grabbing clippers, snip, snip, and much less chance of injury.
The Canneries used to rely on the pair of wire cutters/shears, and drop point knifes, back in the day of fish wheels.
Zinsky
Right-wingers always find new ways to fleece their followers. Liberals should rent scuba gear and drill holes in the bottom of this yacht!
trnc
@SFAW:
Personally, I’d rather see a truthful answer – list several past republican presidents and one or two redeeming qualities about each (yes, every single one had at least one) and then say they can’t find a single redeeming quality about DT unless you support money laundering or the attitude from bratty 5 year olds.