The post title is from a song by Clem Snide, that has this lyric:
They asked him
“Hey, where’s this bus going?”
And he said, “well, I’m really not sure”
“Well then how will you know where to get off?”
And he said, “the place with the most allure”
It looks like the place with the most allure, at the moment, is no testimony from Bolton. Aides are saying that the only firm vote for witnesses is Mittens, and the Angel Moroni and his wife both know that firmness is not his strong suit. Murkowski is meeting with McConnell this morning to stare slowly at the swinging watch, and the Post is casting McConnell’s position as he “did not yet have” the votes to block Democrats from calling witnesses.
If I had to put money on it, I’d bet that Bolton doesn’t testify. Letting Democrats ask Bolton questions under oath is just too dangerous to the whole enterprise. Though, I have to admit that not letting him testify will lead to hundreds of campaign ads smashing the weaker Republicans who don’t vote that way, so I’m not 100% sure.
It’s pretty common to know how something is going to turn out in the end. The ring had to go back into the fires of Mordor, Harry had to kill Voldemort, Samantha and Endora had to burn Darren at the stake after one martini too many, and Trump’s gonna skate. But god damn can there be a lot of filler material in the middle.
Open thread.
Targeting Veterans With Disinformation
West of the Rockies
Um, I don’t remember that episode of Bewitched.
HRH mistermix, Lord Bombay Sapphire, Duke of Schweppes
@West of the Rockies: It was in the never-aired crossover episode, where Tabitha rode the train to Petticoat Junction and Samantha had a guest spot on Green Acres.
Mary G
With polls that say anywhere from 55% to 75% of voters, including not many but some Republicans, wanting witnesses and documents, this could be the moment McConnell loses his mojo. I have the sense that everyone but the MAGAts are thoroughly sick of the president’s antics and all the drama. That might be a factor in Biden’s appeal, too.
Barbara
The devil you know is almost always preferable. Yes, if he doesn’t testify that creates known headaches, but if he does, it could create a fatal stroke — or just a few sniffles. If only they knew for sure. Maybe they actually do, because I have to believe that many have backdoor channels to Bolton or his surrogates.
NotMax
Trivia:
According to reliable sources, that wasn’t stage hooch on the set of Bewitched, they always used the real stuff.
Betty Cracker
Lev Parnas and his attorney have tickets to today’s show. Is Parnas executing a reverse Pentangeli?
West of the Rockies
@HRH mistermix, Lord Bombay Sapphire, Duke of Schweppes:
Oh. I thought maybe it was the episode where Samantha used a spell on the castaways to get them off the island and Gilligan lost Tabitha in a bad drug deal (but Pete Malloy and Jim Reed rescued her).
Barbara
Lev Parnas has receipts. Could U.S. Senators possibly not have realized that a mobster relies on his own resources for protection?
Gin & Tonic
@Betty Cracker: Parnas and his lawyer seem to have a good sense of drama.
HRH mistermix, Lord Bombay Sapphire, Duke of Schweppes
@West of the Rockies: Nope, at the end of the one you mentioned, John Gage and Roy DeSoto rode in on Engine 51 and put out the fire before Endora and Sam could get the burning done.
Kai-two
@HRH mistermix, Lord Bombay Sapphire, Duke of Schweppes:
The one with the fling with Mr. Haney?
geg6
@Mary G:
The last poll I saw said that half of Republican voters want witnesses to be called. It may be they want Hunter, but I’m willing to side with them on the calling the witnesses thing.
The Dangerman
Drugs … well, that would explain how the Harlem Globetrotters wound up on Gilligans Island to play robots…
MattF
@Barbara: Not keeping notes and and not bothering with receipts is just careless and lazy. Even career criminals know better. Are Senators serious at their job? Guess not.
HRH mistermix, Lord Bombay Sapphire, Duke of Schweppes
@Kai-two:
Yeah, the one where they had a threesome with Arnold Ziffel.
Joey Maloney
@Barbara: I can easily believe nimrods like Graham fail to appreciate the difference between, you know, steering a contract to a big campaign contributor or sneaking a rider onto an omnibus bill, and dealing with a global crime syndicate.
zhena gogolia
@Betty Cracker:
trollhattan
@West of the Rockies:
Was that the episode with Lurch?
MattF
@geg6: McConnell is relying on the short attention span of the media and of media consumers, i.e., us. He just wants the circus to leave town.
trollhattan
@Betty Cracker:
“More Democrat shenanigans, I see. Hrrumph and good day to you, sir, I say good day!”
trollhattan
@MattF:
Seems a viable strategy, based on history. Time for Trump to do something funny. “Shiny bug!” [scramble, scramble]
Jim, Foolish Literalist
Nicole Wallace said a few minutes ago that Graham is telling the White House to back off of threatening Bolton. Doesn’t look like they’re listening. I’ll bet on a Republican standing up to trump an hour after it actually happens, but it would be sweet if trump’s bullying finally, finally blew up in his face (repost from below):
IANAL but as I understand it, they can’t stop John Bolton from testifying freely, and while IANA friend of John Bolton, and I get that he’s a hard-core, lib-hating right-winger, but he also strikes me as an angry man who would want to settle scores in any way he can
The Dangerman
Barrington Towers are burning AGAIN?
Jim, Foolish Literalist
And if it were cast and written right, I would watch a dark-comedy remake of Bewitched.
HRH mistermix, Lord Bombay Sapphire, Duke of Schweppes
@Jim, Foolish Literalist: Bolton’s such a piece of shit. All he needs to do is walk to the nearest microphone and tell his story. He could do it at some foreign policy think tank luncheon, or he could have an interview with Chris Wallace. But no, he wants to sell that fucking book instead.
Mai naem mobile
I don’t believe that Mitch didnt know what was in the Bolton book. Come the f@&k on. They’ve been talking about this stupid book for a few months. Mitch should have his own resources. Do not find believable .
West of the Rockies
@trollhattan:
I think so. He hooked up with Lovey while Gomez and The Professor were blowing up trains.
MattF
@Jim, Foolish Literalist: See: Sabrina. On Netflix.
JMG
The thing is, Mitch counts votes as a skilled legislator does, not counting on any vote until he’s heard personally from the voter, while the rest of us count votes in Congress based on our past experience of how those voters behave on a tough one. So Mitch isn’t lying when he says it’s not a done deal, he’s just being technical. The fix is in and always has been. It is the belief of the Republican Party that nothing it does can possibly have any negative blowback at the polls. They weren’t exactly right about that in 2018.
Jager
@MattF:
When the circus leaves town, who cleans up all the elephant shit?
MattF
@Jager: That question occurred to me as well.
Cheryl Rofer
OT, but here’s a fun challenge in case you don’t have any unmarked maps around your house.
Betty Cracker
Reposting from downstairs — fits better here.
Rep. Eliot Engel says he reached out to Bolton back in September (after Bolton was fired) to see if he’d talk to the House Foreign Affairs Committee, and Bolton said they should look into Ambassador Yovanovitch’s firing and implied something improper was going on. Dayum!
The Dems have been patiently sitting on this for months.
HRH mistermix, Lord Bombay Sapphire, Duke of Schweppes
@The Dangerman:
Never trust Tabitha with a book of matches.
But don’t worry, after Cap and Chet rescued her, and Roy and John treated her for smoke inhalation, Dixie had a good talk with her at Rampart and all is well.
jc
The attempts by the Republicans to cover-up for a skunk like Trump, the corrupt game playing would be laughable if it wasn’t so horrifying.
Kent
I honestly think we are better off with the Senate voting against witnesses then rushing to acquittal in a fraudulent trial. Then having more and more shit continually drip out all summer long.
We aren’t about removing Trump at this point. We are about tainting his 2020 campaign with the endless drip drip of scandal that he can’t get out from underneath because they rammed through a fraudulent show trial. And, of course this is about retaking the Senate. Refusal to hear witnesses and then having a lot of new shit come out is only going to make things worse for all the Senate candidates in purple states.
Bolton, on the other hand is a genius. Either way he sells more books.
Jager
trunp will be so wound up at the SOTU speech he may drop his pants and show his ass to the dem side, giving Nancy P a view of his man parts. Her press conference will include a Vienna sausage as a visual aid.
?BillinGlendaleCA
@Betty Cracker: Must have been Gilligan’s drug deal.
Jim, Foolish Literalist
@JMG: in 2012, I would watch Mitt Romney put on a figurative little hat and figuratively dance for the sort of people he would never allow to use the front door of one of his homes or sit on the living room furniture and think, “There must be at least a small part of that man that wants to say, ‘you know what? I’ve got a beautiful wife, a couple of dozen grandchildren, three or four pieces of the choicest real estate in the country, and more money than gosh. You goobers can all go chase yourselves [ed: Mormon swearing]”. It’s a wonder to me that just out of dignity and arrogance he doesn’t smile coldly and say something similar to Mitch. But I’m not looking to fulfill my father’s dream of the Mormon Kennedys, so….
Daddy issues gonna be the death of our Republic.
bjacques
My favorite version of Bewitched has always been National Lampoon’s, illustrated by the late Berni Wrightson.
Barbara
@jc: Like I keep saying, they have sold their souls for a mobbed up piece of excrement. It’s just revolting. All of them, no redeeming virtues whatsoever after showing how low they are willing to go.
West of the Cascades
I suspect there will be no witnesses, but it’s not a good look for the GOP (and especially folks like Ernst, Tillis, Collins, McSally, and Gardner when the even the FTFNYT has headlines like “GOP Scrambles for Votes to Block Witnesses.”
Also rooting for injuries in the Parnas-Graham throwdown.
Tractarian
Does anyone else think the fight over witnesses in general, and Bolton in particular, is a little misguided?
Given the extreme likelihood (somewhere north of 99.99999%) that at least 34 GOP senators will vote for acquittal no matter what evidence is introduced, this is all about setting up political arguments for November.
And politically speaking, there really is no difference between Bolton publishing his manuscript and Bolton testifying before the Senate. Either way, the public will hear it. And either way, 34 GOP senators will vote to acquit.
In my opinion, it’s better for Dems to be able to say “The GOP didn’t allow any witnesses and didn’t let us have a fair trial.”
Tractarian
@Kent: Beat me to it.
The only people who should rationally want witnesses to testify are senators like Mitt and Collins, who will inevitably vote to acquit but want to make it look fair.
Jim, Foolish Literalist
wait… what? Elliot Engel is the chair of foreign relations, I believe
Nicole Wallace droppin’ gossip like it’s about to go out of style: Mike Pompeo has lawyered up
zhena gogolia
@Cheryl Rofer:
I got 8 out of 10. I changed my answer on one at the last second and was wrong. And I should have known the 10th one too!
Kent
I don’t think it is about vote counting at all. This is all for show. What the GOP leadership and Trump need is a LEGITIMATE exoneration. Or one that can be reasonably spun as legitimate. Before the Bolton book leak exploded, they could reasonably push forward to a vote without witnesses using whatever excuse of the day they wanted….executive privilege, national security, irrelevance, whatever. And then it would be mostly buried and forgotten. If Mulvaney and Pompeo just simply don’t ever testify then the media moves on. Bolton forced the issue with the book leak. Once that was out there it was going to be much more difficult to cover up what everyone already knew.
At this point what McConnell needs is the shortest trial they can push through that still has the whiff of legitimacy and that is looking more and more like it requires Bolton’s testimony. So then they can bury the Bolton stuff as asked and answered and old history next summer and send the media off to chase the next new shiny thing. So we will likely see as much wiggling as they can do to figure out how to hear from Bolton in the most sanitized way, quickly, and then just move on to the vote. All this concern nonsense from Collins and the rest is just part of the show. I seriously think it is all scripted. They are all just trying to feel their way to the shortest and most limited trial they can get away with while still selling it to the media and public as legitimate.
AliceBlue
@Jager: Either that or his guardians will have him so sedated that he’ll be drooling all over the teleprompter. There’s a good chance of him dropping his pants in that scenario too.
zhena gogolia
@Jim, Foolish Literalist:
Remember the frog-leg dinner? He’s been eating s–t for a long time and just can’t stop.
HRH mistermix, Lord Bombay Sapphire, Duke of Schweppes
@Tractarian: If you want to talk downside for Dems, I think a swap where Hunter Biden and some other Democrats who are wingnut enemies gets called, or even if Joe is called and refuses a subpoena, is a not the best outcome. Better to not let them muddy the waters. Otherwise, everything we do to point out that Republicans aren’t taking impeachment seriously is pretty good for Democrats, IMO.
zhena gogolia
@zhena gogolia:
I didn’t appreciate this:
jc
@Barbara: It was less than a week ago that some Dem. Senator (I forget who) used the term “coverup” and some ‘R’ Senator (I forget who) made a big, public stink about what an outrage it was to say that word. This thing is moving fast.
Jim, Foolish Literalist
@zhena gogolia: I felt the same way about Collins and Snowe back in the day: Power was theirs for the taking, they never dared. I’m an introvert who gets tongue-tied speaking in public, I am one of those liberal elitists who looks down on a lot “real Americans”, I could never run, still less be elected, but isn’t the whole point of going into politics, on some level, ambition and a desire for power? The man wanted to be president, he tow-towing to a third-rate racist game-show host and a glorified ward-heeler. A very skilled ward-heeler, but a ward-heeler.
MattF
@Tractarian: The argument in favor of witnesses is 1) it will prolong the circus, 2) there will be unpleasant surprises for Republicans, 3) it will enrage Trump, who has certain honesty and anger-management issues. Given a choice (which is rather doubtful) I’d go for it.
zhena gogolia
@jc:
It was Rep. Nadler. Sen. Collins sent a note to the teacher (Roberts) and Roberts admonished “both sides.”
jc
@Cheryl Rofer: I agree that most Americans couldn’t find (name the place) on an unlabelled map. But I also think Pompeo is an asshole to use that to justify his and Trump’s corruption.
Frankensteinbeck
@geg6:
I’m betting because they’re so deeply stupid and convinced of their side’s infallibility that they actually believe the witnesses will exonerate Trump. But that doesn’t actually matter. If they want witnesses, even for a stupid reason, they want witnesses.
@JMG:
Experience says this is not true. Mitch yells at his caucus to do what he wants, and when that doesn’t work flails about trying to find what will pass. Remember the mess with the tax bill and Obamacare repeal, which his caucus actually wanted? McConnell’s reputation is based on doing easy things that no one else had the chutzpah to do. It’s based on convincing large numbers of assholes to do what they already want, which is to give a middle finger to Dems and pass no legislation.
EDIT – McConnell has ALREADY had this problem with THIS situation. His first draft of the process he wanted failed, and he had to pencil in a new one.
Cheryl Rofer
@zhena gogolia: Was not my idea of an attagirl either
Kent
You are assuming that these two bills didn’t come out exactly as McConnell and the leadership wanted. I don’t truly believe that McConnell and the GOP leadership actually wanted to jam through total Obamacare repeal. That would have been a political disaster for them leading to even bigger 2018 losses and much more likely guaranteed loosing the Senate in 2020 and would have made Trump’s 2020 election campaign much more of an uphill struggle.
McConnell is not stupid. He knows all of this. He also needed red meat for the rubes. Lucky for him he had McCain ready to play the role with all his drama of the thumbs down vote. I think there is a reasonable chance that entire thing was scripted between McConnell and McCain. Be more cynical. It is impossible to be cynical enough when dealing with this bunch.
As for the Tax bill? They rammed through a ridiculously large tax break that was even bigger than even the lobbyists thought to ask for. Took some detours getting there but they got there. I’m not sure what you think was out of McConnell’s control in that process.
WaterGirl
Damn you, mistermix! I haven’t finished Harry Potter yet. :-)
Just being silly, of course, I’m pretty sure the “no spoilers” rule doesn’t apply to anything that old.
?BillinGlendaleCA
@Frankensteinbeck: The Turtle is good at obstruction, he’s not good in getting anything done.
Frankensteinbeck
@Kent:
I saw his expression when McCain betrayed him. Those bills did not come out exactly as McConnell and the leadership wanted. He failed repeatedly on both and pulled one out at the last second and totally failed the other. McConnell is not the mastermind he is painted to be. He’s moderately competent and psychopathic enough to break unwritten rules
Jay
Gin & Tonic
@zhena gogolia: The Ukraine and Bangladesh were too easy, but I got all the rest anyway.
artem1s
@Barbara:
Too bad for the GOP that Stoopid Watergate has a mobbed up John Dean.
Gin & Tonic
@WaterGirl: Just don’t tell me whether Ahab catches the whale.
Jim, Foolish Literalist
@Gin & Tonic: and Russia– I got tripped up on Turkmeinistan
Gin & Tonic
@zhena gogolia: I think that was their attempt at humor.
trollhattan
@Gin & Tonic:
Heh! Everybody knows Ahab tried to catch the windmill.
Kristine
@Jim, Foolish Literalist:
I was thinking the other day that anyone running for POTUS needs to be evaluated for Daddy issues. If yes, barred from seeking the office for life.
pluky
@Cheryl Rofer: 8/10 — having to read all those country briefing papers for Zama HS World History class seems to have worked!
Tenar Arha
@zhena gogolia: Yes. I made a real moue of distaste for that supposed compliment.
Kristine
@Cheryl Rofer: Got 8/10. I admit I surprised myself, and a few were guesses.
Bill Arnold
@Kent:
Looks to me like it’s all or mostly improv on the R side. Agreed it’s about trying to make it look like it’s not a sham trial, but they might not succeed at that; that’s for the press to decide, not the Republican party or even Fox News. And the press can be influenced.
Bill Arnold
@zhena gogolia:
Yeah, that was a little unsettling.
Bob7094
@Cheryl Rofer:
I got 9/10. Who can tell Kyrgistan from Turmenistan?
randy khan
I was thinking “I didn’t know angels had wives.”
And then it slowly dawned on me.
rekoob
@Jim, Foolish Literalist: @Bob7094: Same here. I knew I was close, but no cigar.
Chris Johnson
@Mai naem mobile: Mitch McConnell is at the absolute center of the Putin-guided Russian agent contingent in the US government. He’s like Traitor #1. I’m also real suspicious of Paul Ryan.
That doesn’t mean he is directly conspiring with Bolton to accomplish Bolton’s goals. The problem McConnell has is, he’s accomplished most of his work by relying on ‘don’t ask questions, we are going to deliver results and power’, and relying on Republicans falling in line, which they naturally do.
We’re watching a breaking point unfold, because the wingnut warmonger Republicans who traditionally hated Russia had to be kept in the dark about SO MUCH. And that worked for a long time… but there’s a breaking point, and we’re clearly arriving at it.
One possible outcome is, right wing fascist dictatorship that HATES Russia rather than ‘is puppet of Russia’. I don’t think that would be good, but McConnell has to be shitting himself contemplating that possibility. I think they’d rather see Bernie be President than face that.
Cheryl from Maryland
@zhena gogolia: I know! That’s some first-class trolling from a federally funded organization.
Kent
I don’t mean that they are word for word working through a script. Yes, it is improv. But everyone is still just playing their roles. The objective is an exoneration that is accepted by the press and enough Americans as legitimate. So they have Collins and Mittens and whoever tossing out trial balloons. That is their role. Then they run it up through the FOX universe and see it it takes. Yesterday’s trial balloon was to have the Senate “read” the book sections in private under lock and key to inform themselves of the Bolton allegations without actually putting him on the stand. That didn’t work and the president’s attorney’s accidentally shot that down anyway. So next will be some sort of proposal for limited Bolton testimony that is as scripted and limited as possible. They will keep tossing out ideas until they find the least meaningful one that takes.
Collins knows her script is to provide “legitimacy” to the project by pretending to express concerns and push just far enough until they get to where they think they need to be. By scripted, I think all the votes are pre-determined. They are just fishing around for the way to get there.
Geeno
@Gin & Tonic: I got 9/10 – I missed Turkmenistan – I keep confusing it with Kyrgyzstan.
HRH mistermix, Lord Bombay Sapphire, Duke of Schweppes
@randy khan: Yeah, “the Angel Moroni, as well as Mitt’s wife, both know…” would be a better way to phrase it. I’ve fired my editor and I’m looking for a new one.
Gravenstone
@West of the Rockies:
/Thumbs Up!
Gravenstone
@Jim, Foolish Literalist: No one is going to beat Elizabeth Montgomery for pure unadulterated sex appeal. Hell, even my pre-pubescent self recognized that she had something going on.
Her and Angie Dickinson. /nods
randy khan
@HRH mistermix, Lord Bombay Sapphire, Duke of Schweppes:
Oh, no, it was better the way you wrote it.
J R in WV
@Cheryl Rofer:
I got 8 out of ten, confused about Turkmenistan and Uzbekistan, lucky guess on Bulgaria… Nailed Ukraine and Bangladesh, Pompeo is a dumbass.
Just Chuck
@Chris Johnson: Paul Ryan always struck me as a College Republican who never grew up more than an out-and-out traitor like Turtle or Nunez.
Just Chuck
@J R in WV: I got Eminemstan mixed up with Ubeki-beki-beki-stan-stan.
J R in WV
@zhena gogolia:
I had trouble with all the ‘stans that aren’t in daily combat news. Was lucky on SE Europe…
Sab
@Cheryl Rofer: How’d you do? I got 8/10.
Yutsano
@Cheryl Rofer: 7/10. I overthought too many of them.
J R in WV
@Gravenstone:
And Diana Riggs !!! Whoo, boy, and in leather too !!!
Felanius Kootea
Wow, you guys are good! I only got 5/10. I did get Bangladesh and Ukraine right though,
so I would have passed Pompeo’s specific Mary Louise Kelly test.
Uncle Cosmo
@zhena gogolia: 10/10 here. Helped to have spent two decades researching all things east of the Iron Curtain out of a fascination with Balkan folkdancing. And puck Fompeo with an Ebola-inoculated hockey stick.
TomV
@Geeno: That was my only miss too! I mistook it for Uzbekistan.