Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

Compromise? There is no middle ground between a firefighter and an arsonist.

I did not have this on my fuck 2022 bingo card.

The lights are all blinking red.

Their boy Ron is an empty plastic cup that will never know pudding.

I was promised a recession.

A snarling mass of vitriolic jackals

A thin legal pretext to veneer over their personal religious and political desires.

Shut up, hissy kitty!

Elections aren’t won by handwringing, cowering, and/or bashing your own candidates.

Donald Jessica Trump found guilty as fuck – May 30, 2024!

You can’t attract Republican voters. You can only out organize them.

Everyone is in a bubble, but some bubbles model reality far better than others!

Many life forms that would benefit from greater intelligence, sadly, do not have it.

Trump’s legal defense is going to be a dumpster fire inside a clown car on a derailing train.

This year has been the longest three days of putin’s life.

Let’s not be the monsters we hate.

When we show up, we win.

The poor and middle-class pay taxes, the rich pay accountants, the wealthy pay politicians.

The republican caucus is covering themselves with something, and it’s not glory.

One of our two political parties is a cult whose leader admires Vladimir Putin.

There are some who say that there are too many strawmen arguments on this blog.

Cole, when it comes to calico cats, restraint is overrated.

Come on, media. you have one job. start doing it.

Despite his magical powers, I don’t think Trump is thinking this through, to be honest.

You are here: Home / Open Threads / Today is terrible, so here’s a groundhog

Reader Interactions

81Comments

  5. 5.

    mad citizen

    I watched the whole thing, thank you!  This past summer I had a teenage-ish raccoon that just went to town on my suet feeder.  The cake would be gone every morning.  Then it started chowing down on the suet in the daytime.  Sometimes you just gotta let them do what they’re gonna do.  It’s not around anymore.

  6. 6.

    Boris Rasputin (the evil twin)

    The Super Bowl will be played on Groundhog Day. So, if the teams come out of the tunnels onto the field and see their shadows, will they turn around, run back in, and we’ll have six more weeks of winter? Or will they play the game, then play the same game the next day, and the next, and the next, etc. ? If that’s the case, I want Bill Murray calling the game.

  8. 8.

    Sab

    My parents house used to have a woodchuck with a huge burrow under the whole backyard. Then some foxes moved in. That woodchuck really did a number on the phlox- used to stand on its hind legs and just chomp those flowers off, all around the yard. Seem to coexist with the foxes. Big burrow, different hours abroad.

  9. 9.

    Mnemosyne

    I am now feeling hopeful that my back will be mostly healed by the time I go to Disneyland next weekend. I can already walk without much pain — yay!

    I should probably skip some of the rougher favorite rides (like Indiana Jones) but I should be okay with most of the rest. Phew!

  10. 10.

    Mnemosyne

    And, yes, wearing a back brace to bed last night did seem to help. I slept better and was in slightly less pain when I woke up. Incremental improvement!

  19. 19.

    zhena gogolia

    I’m dreaming of a good old, front-page, prime-time thread that showcases the stellar work Adam Schiff has been doing. There are tons of great clips on his own twitter feed and also on The Moscow Project. For me that would be a respite and inspiring change from all Bernie all the time.

  20. 20.

    Sab

    I had one under my new room this summer. It was working on establishing a new burrow. Jackels said it might cause structural problems. I weeded around the hole into the burrow. It decided to pack up the family and move to somewhere more secure. Ate some lettuce first.

  21. 21.

    Mnemosyne

    @zhena gogolia:

    I am so looking forward to actual VOTES being cast so we can all stop with the BS speculation and have some actual non-poll data to work with.

    And I second the motion for a Schiff post.

  24. 24.

    mrmoshpotato

    @smintheus: Yeah.  Dude’s garden is gonna get chomped!  “Oh look!  Phil has a family – a very very large family!”

    “What would you like from the menu?” “All of it!”

  27. 27.

    mrmoshpotato

    @Sab:

    Six MORE weeks? We haven’t had six weeks yet, and it’s already February. 

    Shhhh.  The snow gods don’t know.

  28. 28.

    WaterGirl

    @pat: Baby shower!  What do you get a mama groundhog?

    veggies, I bet.

    edit: possibly the only baby shower that has ever made me think “that would be fun!”.

  30. 30.

    Boris Rasputin (the evil twin)

    @HinTN:  Actually, I think Bill Murray calling any game will improve it.  Though having him call a square dance might be dangerous.

  33. 33.

    Rusty

    Chunk the Groundhog has been a much needed relief the last few months. I follow him on Instagram. I am searching for a new job and it has been very stressful.  Luckily I was given warning and lead time, but counting down paychecks until they stop is a great recipe for anxiety.  Watching Chunk is a little respite from the pressure.  My kids got me a Chunk the Groundhog sweatshirt for Christmas.  Wearing it is both silly and a relief.  Go Chunk! (He has a girlfriend Nibbles and everyone is hoping for Chunkettes in the spring.)

  36. 36.

    LuciaMia

    Chunk!  Dont mind sharing either but it is frustrating when they only take one bite and leave the rest on the ground to rot.  Had an apple tree where the squirrels would take just one bite and just leave the fruit hanging there on the branch!

  40. 40.

    Aleta

    To catch a groundhog or woodchuck, try my method from a few years ago:

    Hav a heart trap

    Bait with peanut butter + cat food

    Wait about 10 minutes

    Release your cat

  41. 41.

    Ruckus

    @Mnemosyne:

    I’ve got a bad back as well. Herniated a disk, just standing still one day. Have to sleep on a very solid surface and can not sleep on my side for very long at a time. Have to use a pillow between the knees as they are as old as I am. It gets easier. Sort of. Mostly the back doesn’t bother me such that I can’t walk or sleep. Lifting heavy things, now that’s just not done any longer. Which can be difficult as I still work with metal and some chunks of that can be major paper weights. Like heavy enough to hold down the entire federal budget.

    Hope it gets better, a bad back is less than fun. I’ll tell the story of the night I missed once when I pulled the back muscles at work one day. Just has to be only adults in the room when I tell it.

  42. 42.

    Immanentize

    I have a whistlepig under my shed.  He and my cat Co exist and the little fatty ate clover and left my tomatoes and herbs alone.  One baby.  So cute.  It would just sit on a rock outside it’s burrow in the morning waiting for the sun.

  43. 43.

    Old Dan and Little Ann

    We had tons of squirrel traffic in our backyard as well as a groundhog until we got our black lab.  The critters no longer wander around back there.  Even when he’s inside.

  45. 45.

    Martin

    I do normally watch the Super Bowl, but I’m skipping is solely due to the Hannity interview. Nothing is worth watching that shit.

  47. 47.

    Betty Cracker

    @Martin: Will Hannity be performing the tuggie at halftime? I’ve never missed a Super Bowl and don’t intend to start now, but I will definitely turn the TV off for the duration of that spectacle.

  48. 48.

    Sab

    @WaterGirl:

     

    @Betty Cracker:

    Don’t we do that all the time? Toggling between two posts, one dark or one light, or East or West coast, or different candidates, or writing v music. Or food v cats. It is a dull day (and there are lots of them) when there is only one open thread. Those days are at best dull, at worst sad.

  49. 49.

    Keith P

    That groundhog video reminds me of the video of Steven Seagal eating carrots (and tapping watermelons) in Belarus…surreal.

  51. 51.

    opiejeanne

    We have squirrels who dig up our tulips and take bites out of the apples , an occasional raccoon, and meadow voles. Those are like miniature ground hogs but way cuter. The cutest mouse. And very destructive plus prolific breeders. By September we have trouble finding a carrot that isn’t hollowed out from the bottom up. They ate the roots of a young cherry tree and killed it, and they strip the bark off shrubs and fruit trees. But they are adorable.

  53. 53.

    Sab

    @MomSense: Proper whiskys don’t have that “e”. Scots and Canadians have whisky. Irish, English and various Border Southerners ( who can’t make bourbon, since wrong county) have whiskey. Very territorial, but all the makers and all the drinkers do care, a lot.

  55. 55.

    Betty Cracker

    @Sab: True. I’m glad to have an argumentative thread and light-hearted threads today because I was anxiously awaiting news on an ill relative, and I just got a good report. So, thanks, people, for helping me while away the wearisome hours! :)

  60. 60.

    MomSense

    Hey everyone, send some good vibes my kid’s way.  He’s got an audition for something big.

  61. 61.

    Sab

    @MomSense: Whistlepigs are groundhogs are woodchucks. Exact same adorable animal that will destroy your garden and let you starve (he was a rodent. He didn’t know!) Stuck record, but can’t we apply this to the Whitehouse? Sort of a non compens mentis defense? Trump was an innocent rodent. He didn’t know. Democrats ate scheming swine. Republicans are naive bumblers (why do we leave you on charge.)

  64. 64.

    Mnemosyne

    @MomSense:

    I injured it coughing while I had the flu. Still bitter about that. ?

    @Ruckus:

    Now I have to get serious about losing weight — that extra 30 pounds is really hurting my knees AND my back. Argh.

  65. 65.

    Amir Khalid

    Off topic. I think I’ve done something I shouldn’t have. My Google search is now redirected to something called xscx.xyz. It’s not Google Search and I want to change it back. Any idea how to do that?

  67. 67.

    MomSense

    @Mnemosyne:

    Oh no!  I had a bad respiratory virus but the severe coughing caused a more common problem.  Humiliating but easy to fix.  Fortunately I was at home. ?

  68. 68.

    Sab

    @Mnemosyne: I threw my pack out twisting at Yolo County Jaycee crab feed in 1986. That was just stupid. My spouse has back issues that are serious and occassionally operated on and not stupid at all. Scoliosis in his spine. Arthritis. Stenosis. Factory worker in punishng work.

    I know how much a stupid, I shouldn’t have done that back injury hurts. Thousands and thousands of people have back injuries different from that. The injuries weren’t stupid. Work required those injuries. Factory workers, like my husband. Professional sports people. Basketball, Football, Baseball. Grueling. It all hurts, often a lot.

  69. 69.

    Another Scott

    @Tehanu: Spring was trying to start today in NoVA.  Low 50F.  The shoots from the bulbs are poking out much more, the Crocuses are blooming in a neighbor’s yard, the grass is greening up, etc.

    February 1.

    It’s scary.  :-(

    Cheers,
    Scott.

  75. 75.

    Steeplejack

    @Amir Khalid:

    I think you use Firefox as your browser?

    Tools | Options | Search | Default search engine.

    Or, in the search box on your menu bar (if you have that visible), click the little magnifying glass, then “Change search settings.”

  76. 76.

    Jackie

    @Martin: The google says Hannity interview is at pre-game 3:30 ET. My ? will be diverted to a different channel. I’m hoping millions of tv’s switch channels at that time and give a poor/ dropped rating.

  79. 79.

    Kathleen

    @Mnemosyne: Glad to hear you’re feeling better and hope you can enjoy Disneyland. I have so many fond memories of that place from my childhood. My uncle was a juvenile probation officer in Orange County so we always got to go for free!

Comments are closed.