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Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

It may be funny to you motherfucker, but it’s not funny to me.

Make the republican party small enough to drown in a bathtub.

They fucked up the fucking up of the fuckup!

A snarling mass of vitriolic jackals

Let’s delete this post and never speak of this again.

Fuck these fucking interesting times.

We’ve had enough carrots to last a lifetime. break out the sticks.

Putting aside our relentless self-interest because the moral imperative is crystal clear.

Republicans do not pay their debts.

And now I have baud making fun of me. this day can’t get worse.

A thin legal pretext to veneer over their personal religious and political desires

In my day, never was longer.

When someone says they “love freedom”, rest assured they don’t mean yours.

Tick tock motherfuckers!

… riddled with inexplicable and elementary errors of law and fact

Do not shrug your shoulders and accept the normalization of untruths.

The poor and middle-class pay taxes, the rich pay accountants, the wealthy pay politicians.

Impressively dumb. Congratulations.

Perhaps you mistook them for somebody who gives a damn.

All your base are belong to Tunch.

That’s my take and I am available for criticism at this time.

Is it negotiation when the other party actually wants to shoot the hostage?

I’ve spoken to my cat about this, but it doesn’t seem to do any good.

The GOP couldn’t organize an orgy in a whorehouse with a fist full of 50s.

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You are here: Home / Politics / Republican Convention – Dumpster Fire: Day 2

Republican Convention – Dumpster Fire: Day 2

by WaterGirl|  August 25, 20208:37 pm| 481 Comments

This post is in: Politics

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Here you go.

Republican Convention Thead 1

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Previous Post: « Tuesday Evening Open Thread: Strap in for the RNC Carnival
Next Post: Open Thread: Anything But The Convention »

Reader Interactions

481Comments

  1. 1.

    Mary G

    August 25, 2020 at 8:41 pm

    I started to try to watch; there was a guy from the Navajo Nation, but the sound and the picture were so far out of sync I had to stop.

  2. 2.

    MomSense

    August 25, 2020 at 8:41 pm

    And we’re off.  So looks like tonight is going to be about commuting sentences.

  3. 3.

    MomSense

    August 25, 2020 at 8:42 pm

    @Mary G:

    He was talking super fast, too.

  4. 4.

    SiubhanDuinne

    August 25, 2020 at 8:42 pm

    Is this a political convention or a revival meeting?

  5. 5.

    Steeplejack

    August 25, 2020 at 8:43 pm

    Black criminal guy (John Ponder?) redeemed by Jesus—and Trump!

  6. 6.

    dmsilev

    August 25, 2020 at 8:45 pm

    @MomSense: Reality-TV show host again, I guess.

  7. 7.

    Steeplejack

    August 25, 2020 at 8:46 pm

    @SiubhanDuinne:

    Revival/A.A.-style meeting so far.

  8. 8.

    debbie

    August 25, 2020 at 8:46 pm

    Loved the dumpster fire photo from last night.

  9. 9.

    MomSense

    August 25, 2020 at 8:47 pm

    Here we go – no reason for a black man to be afraid of police.  Just pray harder and God will give you good LEO.

  10. 10.

    WaterGirl

    August 25, 2020 at 8:47 pm

    @debbie: Are you talking about the GIF up top, or the photo from last night’s thread?

  11. 11.

    Steeplejack

    August 25, 2020 at 8:49 pm

    Trump standing woodenly between Jon Ponder and Richard Beasley, former FBI agent involved in Ponder’s case. Ponder spoke at length, Beasley speaking at length. I don’t know what this is supposed to accomplish. Do Trump voters care about ex-offenders? Rhetorical question.

    Okay, Beasley pivoting to “people are being mean to law enforcement.” Now we’re talking.

    Trump surprise: he’s granting a full pardon to Ponder! Straight out of cheesy “reality” TV.

  12. 12.

    Steeplejack

    August 25, 2020 at 8:50 pm

    @Steeplejack:

    LOL. Closeup of Trump signing pardon with huge Sharpie. Sharpie scratching is extremely loud.

  13. 13.

    Steeplejack

    August 25, 2020 at 8:51 pm

    Rand Paul. “I did medical missionary work in Guatemala.” Fuck this guy. Donald Trump somehow helped make that happen. Allegedly.

  14. 14.

    Steeplejack

    August 25, 2020 at 8:51 pm

    “President Trump gets things done.” C’mon, man!

  15. 15.

    MomSense

    August 25, 2020 at 8:51 pm

    Trump has the chin jut tough face while he stands woodenly listening to these testimonials.

    LEO are being treated so unfairly.  Trump is now granting John a full pardon. Now he’s signing an EO – with his sinus rhythm signature.

  16. 16.

    Steeplejack

    August 25, 2020 at 8:51 pm

    “Association health plans”? What even are those?

  17. 17.

    MomSense

    August 25, 2020 at 8:52 pm

    Rand Paul hates red tape and the Biden crime bill because it harms POC.

    Really.

  18. 18.

    Ken

    August 25, 2020 at 8:53 pm

    @Steeplejack: Given the cheap writers for this timeline, I expect to see Ponder commit some crime – or perhaps kill someone in a drunk driving accident. Cliches, cliches.

  19. 19.

    MomSense

    August 25, 2020 at 8:53 pm

    Rand Paul quotes Madison. Drink!

  20. 20.

    Steeplejack

    August 25, 2020 at 8:54 pm

    Paul: “Fight the socialist poison in our schools.” Whut?

  21. 21.

    Another Scott

    August 25, 2020 at 8:54 pm

    Thread.

    It's been a month since Senate Republicans cruelly allowed Americans' enhanced unemployment benefits to expire amid a pandemic and economic crisis.

    Don't be fooled by the stock market: millions of families are experiencing deep hardship. Warning signs for the economy abound. 1/

    — Rep. Don Beyer (@RepDonBeyer) August 25, 2020

    Eyes on the prizes.

    Cheers,
    Scott.

  22. 22.

    MomSense

    August 25, 2020 at 8:55 pm

    Socialists are poisoning our schools and burning our cities!

  23. 23.

    Steeplejack

    August 25, 2020 at 8:55 pm

    Montage: forgotten men and women in America. Apparently white people in outtakes from pickup truck commercials.

  24. 24.

    Jinchi

    August 25, 2020 at 8:55 pm

    @Steeplejack: So he’s literally using the power of his office as a campaign stunt with the bonus of it being payment for campaign services rendered.

  25. 25.

    Steeplejack

    August 25, 2020 at 8:56 pm

    @Ken:

    Multi-state crime spree. My first thought.

  26. 26.

    SiubhanDuinne

    August 25, 2020 at 8:56 pm

    @Steeplejack:

    Sharpie scratching is extremely loud.

    Somebody on the crack planning team forgot to do a mic check.

  27. 27.

    Steeplejack

    August 25, 2020 at 8:56 pm

    Mucho Getty-esque stock footage in that montage.

  28. 28.

    WaterGirl

    August 25, 2020 at 8:57 pm

    @Steeplejack:

    LOL. Closeup of Trump signing pardon with huge Sharpie. Sharpie scratching is extremely loud.

    Is that made up, or for real?  Impossible to tell without watching.

  29. 29.

    MomSense

    August 25, 2020 at 8:57 pm

    @Steeplejack:

    INORITE!  Why was it so loud?

  30. 30.

    MomSense

    August 25, 2020 at 8:58 pm

    @WaterGirl:

    Totally for real.  It was like watching a toddler color.

  31. 31.

    Steeplejack

    August 25, 2020 at 9:00 pm

    Jason Joyce, lobsterman from Swan’s Island, ME. Weird story: Obama and Biden put some fishing grounds off limits. Even though we lobstermen don’t fish there, it offended us greatly. No input from stakeholders, etc. Trump rescinded those orders. Yay! (Implied? And now we will fish the hell out of those grounds.)

  32. 32.

    MomSense

    August 25, 2020 at 9:00 pm

    Cow milking!  Reformed city slicker! Drink!
    City slicker?  Who the fuck talks like that anymore?

  33. 33.

    different-church-lady

    August 25, 2020 at 9:00 pm

    Ooopsie:

    Convention speaker Mary Ann Mendoza removed from lineup after tweeting anti-Semitic conspiracy theory

  34. 34.

    MomSense

    August 25, 2020 at 9:01 pm

    @Steeplejack:

    Some of this hose lobstermen are dumber than a post.

  35. 35.

    WaterGirl

    August 25, 2020 at 9:01 pm

    @Ken: What is the Ponder guy being pardoned for?

  36. 36.

    Steeplejack

    August 25, 2020 at 9:01 pm

    Cris Peterson, dairy farmer lady from Grantsburg, WI. Her barn burned, neighbors helped her rebuild even better. Her title is CFO of Four Cubs Farm. Wonder how small and mom-and-pop that operation is. ?

    Somehow Trump was intimately involved in all of this.

  37. 37.

    Baud

    August 25, 2020 at 9:01 pm

    @different-church-lady:

    That happens every convention.

  38. 38.

    ?BillinGlendaleCA

    August 25, 2020 at 9:02 pm

    @SiubhanDuinne: Technically the convention adjourned yesterday afternoon until 2024.

  39. 39.

    TS (the original)

    August 25, 2020 at 9:02 pm

    @MomSense:

    Thanks for watching – Last night I watched but did not listen – today I can’t bring myself to do either. I’ll watch Rachel’s summary when its over

  40. 40.

    Steeplejack

    August 25, 2020 at 9:02 pm

    Lower energy level, slower pace than last night so far.

  41. 41.

    Steeplejack

    August 25, 2020 at 9:03 pm

    Montage: businesses closing because of regulations. Trump slashed regulations, business is back! And it’s all small mom-and-pop business, let’s get that straight.

  42. 42.

    Steeplejack

    August 25, 2020 at 9:04 pm

    “The president’s job is to be CEO of our country.” Colossally bad take from some nitwit who probably isn’t even a business owner.

  43. 43.

    Another Scott

    August 25, 2020 at 9:04 pm

    @different-church-lady: There’s always a tweet, part 13,123,123,123.

    I will help Angel Mom (and great woman) Mary Ann Mendoza with Twitter. I know Mary Ann from the beginning, and she should never be silenced. She is a winner who has lost so much, her child. Twitter, if you’re watching, please do what you have to do, NOW! @foxandfriends

    — Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) July 21, 2019

    Cheers,
    Scott.

  44. 44.

    Steeplejack

    August 25, 2020 at 9:04 pm

    Larry Kudlow. Time to start the drinking. Rum and tonic tonight. Mount Gay Eclipse.

  45. 45.

    MomSense

    August 25, 2020 at 9:05 pm

    Joe Biden is going to raise taxes for everyone and kill our American dreams.

  46. 46.

    Steeplejack

    August 25, 2020 at 9:05 pm

    “Rising tide lifts all boats.” Thanks, Larry. Genius insight.

  47. 47.

    MomSense

    August 25, 2020 at 9:05 pm

    Larry Kudlow isn’t slurring too badly.  They must ave taped this early this morning.

  48. 48.

    lgerard

    August 25, 2020 at 9:06 pm

    @Steeplejack:

    Paul: “Fight the socialist poison in our schools.” Whut?

    My wingnut friend has been going on about how we have to open the schools because “socializing” is an important part of education.

    When I pointed out that he has spent the 5 years I have known him ranting against “government schools” and “indoctrination” he pretends not to understand.

  49. 49.

    Ken

    August 25, 2020 at 9:06 pm

    @Steeplejack: Montage: forgotten men and women in America. Apparently white people in outtakes from pickup truck commercials.

    Look for the “PHOTOSTOCK” watermarks.

  50. 50.

    Winston

    August 25, 2020 at 9:07 pm

    payroll tax cuts. This right here makes Trump voters mortal enemies of seniors on SSA.

  51. 51.

    Steeplejack

    August 25, 2020 at 9:07 pm

    @SiubhanDuinne:

    It was like cartoonishly loud.

  52. 52.

    MomSense

    August 25, 2020 at 9:07 pm

    So many booms!  Manufacturing housing tax cuts regulatory relief.

    Biden wants to pick pockets and drain money from our wallets.  How does he find the time with all that school poisoning and dream killing?

  53. 53.

    Gin & Tonic

    August 25, 2020 at 9:08 pm

    @Steeplejack: They are model citizens who get along great with their neighbors.

  54. 54.

    Urza

    August 25, 2020 at 9:08 pm

    @WaterGirl: Bank Robbery

  55. 55.

    debbie

    August 25, 2020 at 9:09 pm

    @WaterGirl:

    I like tonight’s also, but last night’s cracked me up.

  56. 56.

    Steeplejack

    August 25, 2020 at 9:09 pm

    John Peterson, owner of Schuette Metals, Wausau, WI. Obama and Biden put our business in a tailspin. Apparently with banking regulations? “Tied uor lenders’ hands.”

    Trump cut “draconian-type banking regulations.” I don’t see any future problems there.

  57. 57.

    Ken

    August 25, 2020 at 9:09 pm

    @Steeplejack: Montage: businesses closing because of regulations. Trump slashed regulations, business is back! And it’s all small mom-and-pop business, let’s get that straight.

    Meanwhile, here in the real universe mom-and-pop businesses are going bankrupt at a record rate due to the pandemic.

  58. 58.

    MomSense

    August 25, 2020 at 9:09 pm

    Wisconsin business owner also hates red tape and regulations!  Why does Biden hate capital so much?

  59. 59.

    MomSense

    August 25, 2020 at 9:10 pm

    @Ken:

    Unpossible!  Kudlow says the pandemic is over!

  60. 60.

    Steeplejack

    August 25, 2020 at 9:10 pm

    @WaterGirl:

    I will tell you when I’m joking! You didn’t believe us about Kim Guilfoyle last night, and look how that turned out.

  61. 61.

    Baud

    August 25, 2020 at 9:11 pm

    @MomSense:

    Are they trying to get Bernie supporters to come out for Biden?

  62. 62.

    Ken

    August 25, 2020 at 9:12 pm

    @different-church-lady: @Another Scott: Apparently her twitter history is full of anti-semitic stuff, so the issue must have been the timing.  Got to keep quiet for the two days before speaking at the RNC, perhaps.

  63. 63.

    Steeplejack

    August 25, 2020 at 9:12 pm

    Cissie Graham Lynch, granddaughter of Billy Graham. Looks a bit like an edgy alt-country singer in late career.

    “People of faith suddenly had a strong advocate in the White House.”

  64. 64.

    Calouste

    August 25, 2020 at 9:12 pm

    @Steeplejack:

    Nice people, as to be expected:

    The complaint states that after Cris had served on the co-op’s board of directors for three years, she lost her re-election bid and then became “a bitter enemy of the Cooperative, its Board of Directors and its management.”

    http://www.burnettcountysentinel.com/news/dairy-lawsuit-claims-campaign-of-defamation-and-deception-by-four-cubs-farm/article_c53ba38c-6875-11ea-8bc1-1395cbf16ee5.html

  65. 65.

    Eljai

    August 25, 2020 at 9:12 pm

    Why is religious lady dressed like Hermoine from Harry Potter?

  66. 66.

    MomSense

    August 25, 2020 at 9:12 pm

    Cissie is going to tell us how our founders wanted us to exercise our religion in our schools and town centers while Obama Biden wanted to crush religion and force abortion drugs on us.  They wanted boys to play girls sports.

  67. 67.

    Steeplejack

    August 25, 2020 at 9:13 pm

    “The radical left’s God is political power.”

  68. 68.

    Leto

    August 25, 2020 at 9:13 pm

    I’m able to watch about thirty seconds at a time before I want to start hurling shit at the TV. Instead I turn it back over to the Philly Union v NYC Red Bull soccer match. At least I know the paid actors here.

  69. 69.

    Winston

    August 25, 2020 at 9:13 pm

    religious freedom: threesomes at last.

  70. 70.

    MomSense

    August 25, 2020 at 9:14 pm

    @Eljai:

    What is her tie holding together?
    Oh this lady is Billie Graham’s granddaughter.

  71. 71.

    WaterGirl

    August 25, 2020 at 9:14 pm

    @?BillinGlendaleCA: For real?  Then they really should stop airing it.

    So did Trump already accept the nomination, or are they stupid enough to adjourn the convention without doing that step?

  72. 72.

    Steeplejack

    August 25, 2020 at 9:15 pm

    Robert Vlaisavljevich, mayor of Eveleth, MI. Yeah, I’ma catch up on the comments. This guy radiates “snoozer.”

    But, wait, he’s a lifelong Democrat!

  73. 73.

    debbie

    August 25, 2020 at 9:15 pm

    @Steeplejack:

    Did she thank Trump for her bailout money?  //

  74. 74.

    WaterGirl

    August 25, 2020 at 9:15 pm

    @Steeplejack: I bet all the people – who lost their unemployment and can’t pay their rent or buy food – feel really good about these businesses booming.

  75. 75.

    Ken

    August 25, 2020 at 9:16 pm

    @WaterGirl: Did you miss the memo? Trump is the Party, the Party is Trump.

  76. 76.

    Baud

    August 25, 2020 at 9:16 pm

    @Steeplejack:

    I wonder if conservatives will complain about Dems appearing at the RNC.

  77. 77.

    WaterGirl

    August 25, 2020 at 9:16 pm

    @MomSense: Hey, Trump already did half of that for Joe already.

  78. 78.

    Leto

    August 25, 2020 at 9:16 pm

    “We lost a generation of young people… (long pause)… from the Iron Range when they had to leave to look for jobs.”

    I honestly thought, with that 9 month pregnant pause, that an entire generation of cheddar heads was gone forever. Maybe they followed Farve to MN?

  79. 79.

    MomSense

    August 25, 2020 at 9:17 pm

    Oh here we go the radical environmentalists have dragged Th e Democratic Party so far left this mayor of some Minnesota town had to support the straight talking New Yorker.  Biden is so week scared and sleepy that AOC is the one running things.

  80. 80.

    SiubhanDuinne

    August 25, 2020 at 9:17 pm

    @WaterGirl:

    What is the Ponder guy being pardoned for?

    He knows what he did.

  81. 81.

    Baud

    August 25, 2020 at 9:18 pm

    @MomSense:

    Seriously, are they trying to get Bernie supporters to come out for Joe?

  82. 82.

    Steeplejack

    August 25, 2020 at 9:18 pm

    Abby Johnson, “pro-life” activist who used to work at Planned Parenthood. (Background from me: Her “conversion” story has been widely questioned as suspect.)

    Margaret Sanger, a racist, founded Planned Parenthood to “eradicate” minority groups. (Not a joke, WaterGirl!)

    “I was assigned an abortion quota.”

    ETA: This is execrable.

  83. 83.

    Mike in NC

    August 25, 2020 at 9:18 pm

    @Steeplejack: Thanks to the trade war, the Chinese are buying all their lobster from Canada.

  84. 84.

    Jeffro

    August 25, 2020 at 9:19 pm

    @lgerard: that’s because what he means is he wants kids back in school so that parents can go to work (pandemic? What pandemic??!) but while they are in school he wants them to learn hard-core capitalism

     

    see? So easy ?

  85. 85.

    WaterGirl

    August 25, 2020 at 9:19 pm

    @debbie: I liked it, too.  I just added it to tonight’s post, also.

  86. 86.

    MomSense

    August 25, 2020 at 9:19 pm

    @Baud:

    This is a whiplash night.  Cops are good Biden crime bill bad.

    oh an Cissie’s abortion drugs are really contraception.

  87. 87.

    HumboldtBlue

    August 25, 2020 at 9:20 pm

    @Steeplejack:

    I bet her husband watches from the closet as well, she has that same dead-eye-Christian-freak-for-Jesus (pronounced Hayzoos) look going on.

  88. 88.

    Urza

    August 25, 2020 at 9:20 pm

    @WaterGirl: He accepted the nomination yesterday.  Seems like that should take longer in normal years, but i’m not watching this mess so what do I know.

  89. 89.

    Steeplejack

    August 25, 2020 at 9:20 pm

    This woman is awful: straight up abortion carnography in the most unbelievably explicit, overwrought terms. This is beyond the pale.

  90. 90.

    Winston

    August 25, 2020 at 9:20 pm

    @Jeffro:
    Nearly 9,000 Florida Children Diagnosed With Coronavirus in Two Weeks as Schools Reopen

  91. 91.

    MomSense

    August 25, 2020 at 9:21 pm

    Oh fuck – Abby johnson is talking about how abortion smells?  They tear corpses into bits.  Holy hell this is gruesome.

    She is all about the pro life judges.

  92. 92.

    Steeplejack

    August 25, 2020 at 9:21 pm

    Trump is “the most pro-life president we have ever had.”

  93. 93.

    WaterGirl

    August 25, 2020 at 9:21 pm

    @Steeplejack: Point taken.

  94. 94.

    debbie

    August 25, 2020 at 9:21 pm

    @Steeplejack:

    Who’da thunk whoremonger Trump would be Christianity’s savior? Let me off this crazy bus!

  95. 95.

    Steeplejack

    August 25, 2020 at 9:22 pm

    Uh-oh, montage leading into smirking teenager Nicholas Sandmann. “et’s here this creep speak.

  96. 96.

    MomSense

    August 25, 2020 at 9:22 pm

    Catholic shit head kid was at a pro life rally when he was unfairly persecuted for his MAGA hat.

  97. 97.

    WaterGirl

    August 25, 2020 at 9:23 pm

    @Ken: I did see their little “whereas” document.  Appalling.

    It’s “I’ll have what he’s having”, taken to the nth degree.

  98. 98.

    Leto

    August 25, 2020 at 9:23 pm

    @MomSense:  Yeah, Maddow covered the lie of birth control being an abortion inducing drug. Funny that’s it’s just female birth control, and not condoms, that’s an issue.

  99. 99.

    MomSense

    August 25, 2020 at 9:23 pm

    Sandmann was just trying to defend the unborn and was persecuted for his hat.

  100. 100.

    MomSense

    August 25, 2020 at 9:24 pm

    @Leto:

    Every sperm is sacred?

  101. 101.

    Suzanne

    August 25, 2020 at 9:24 pm

    This kid is not very smart.

  102. 102.

    SiubhanDuinne

    August 25, 2020 at 9:24 pm

    Who is this zombie who’s on now?

    ETA: Never mind, it’s the Kovington Kristian Kid. Yuck.

  103. 103.

    WaterGirl

    August 25, 2020 at 9:25 pm

    @Urza: thanks.  It must have been in the morning or sometime during the day.

  104. 104.

    Steeplejack

    August 25, 2020 at 9:25 pm

    @Gin & Tonic:

    Good catch!

  105. 105.

    Leto

    August 25, 2020 at 9:25 pm

    @MomSense: He has a Richard Spencer level punchable face.

  106. 106.

    Steeplejack

    August 25, 2020 at 9:25 pm

    Sandmann is actually making more people want to punch him in the face.

  107. 107.

    MomSense

    August 25, 2020 at 9:25 pm

    The lame stream media tried to cancel him.  The far left is trying to cancel people.

  108. 108.

    Suzanne

    August 25, 2020 at 9:26 pm

    @MomSense: She was fucking grotesque and it made me want to throw up. Does she know that she just described a D&C and probably made every woman who ever had to have one due to a miscarriage pretty freaked out.

  109. 109.

    NotMax

    August 25, 2020 at 9:26 pm

    @Steeplejack

    Trump surprise: he’s granting a full pardon to Ponder! Straight out of cheesy “reality” TV.

    “And a year’s supply of Goya beans!”

  110. 110.

    Emma from FL

    August 25, 2020 at 9:26 pm

    That kid is going to get his ass handed to him throughout his life. Hiss asshole parents should have been less publicity-driven.

    This is all red meat to the base. I am betting that for every idiot feeling exhalted by this freak parade there are five that are feeling queasy to their stomach and rethinking their beliefs.

  111. 111.

    Suzanne

    August 25, 2020 at 9:27 pm

    Oh FFS the hat.

  112. 112.

    Baud

    August 25, 2020 at 9:27 pm

    @Suzanne: I doubt she would care.

  113. 113.

    Steeplejack

    August 25, 2020 at 9:27 pm

    Pam Bondi: “I helped steal the 2000 election!” Sorry, that’s a joke, WaterGirl.

    “I fought corruption, and I know what it looks like.” Because I was tits-deep in it.

  114. 114.

    Leto

    August 25, 2020 at 9:28 pm

    @MomSense: If that’s the case:

    ”Magnum Man, let my sperm go!” – Moses, Exodus 4:20

  115. 115.

    Steeplejack

    August 25, 2020 at 9:28 pm

    Okay, Bondi is hitting Hunter Biden. I cannot believe the Republicans think nepotism is a good angle for them.

  116. 116.

    TS (the original)

    August 25, 2020 at 9:28 pm

    @Gin & Tonic:

    They are model citizens who get along great with their neighbors.

    That is some read – got all upset because

    1. voted out of co-op board
    2. their milk was not up to standard

    Sound like a great MAGA family

  117. 117.

    Yutsano

    August 25, 2020 at 9:29 pm

    @SiubhanDuinne: This is terrible. He’s so wooden. And it’s so obviously terribly edited. He is literally reading with no inflection. That’s gonna win votes.

    Ooh Bondi trying to bash Biden for corruption? Another soulless delivery. I had to stop. I just wanted to listen to the kid. And he’s been so exploited. When they dump him after this it’s gonna be hard. Bless his heart.

  118. 118.

    Amir Khalid

    August 25, 2020 at 9:29 pm

    How many times has Hunter Biden been mentioned today?

  119. 119.

    Yutsano

    August 25, 2020 at 9:30 pm

    @Amir Khalid: She won’t be the last. They still think this is a winner for them.

  120. 120.

    Jeffro

    August 25, 2020 at 9:31 pm

    So…not exactly bringing in swing voters or waffling Democrats tonight, huh??

    Then who cares?  Let ‘em fly those freak flags high.

  121. 121.

    khead

    August 25, 2020 at 9:31 pm

    @Steeplejack:

    Yeah, I just burst out laughing anytime these folks (or anyone else I know) start complaining about “family members of Joe Biden with no experience” being hired for something.

  122. 122.

    MomSense

    August 25, 2020 at 9:31 pm

    Pam Bondi knows what corruption looks like.

    Bet she does.  But we’re on to Hunter Biden and Ukraine and how he was being investigated by a prosecutor that his dad took care of.  And now he’s up to his old tricks with communist Chinese bankers who gave us coronavirus.

     

    I’m going to need some red yarn or charts or something to follow this.

  123. 123.

    MomSense

    August 25, 2020 at 9:31 pm

    Wait what?  747s full of cash?

  124. 124.

    Gin & Tonic

    August 25, 2020 at 9:32 pm

    @TS (the original):  And besides, doesn’t “dairy co-op” sound a lot like, you know, socialism?

  125. 125.

    Jeffro

    August 25, 2020 at 9:32 pm

    @Steeplejack: well, there’s their nepotism, and then there’s our nepotism.  Which are totally different…

  126. 126.

    MomSense

    August 25, 2020 at 9:32 pm

    How did she get her face to be about five shades lighter than her neck?

  127. 127.

    Leto

    August 25, 2020 at 9:35 pm

    @khead: Joy Reid bringing up all those points, as well as reminding everyone that she dropped the case against Trumpov U after receiving a campaign donation from Trumpov.

  128. 128.

    James E Powell

    August 25, 2020 at 9:35 pm

    @Leto:

    An illegal campaign donation that no one in the press/media thought was worth talking about.

  129. 129.

    Steeplejack

    August 25, 2020 at 9:35 pm

    Montage: women in power.

    Kimberly Guilfoyle: “I don’t want the job because I’m a woman. I want the job because I’m the best person for the job.” Which is why I’m getting $15,000 a month to be Don Jr.’s girlfriend.

  130. 130.

    Emma from FL

    August 25, 2020 at 9:36 pm

    @MomSense: By using the same base. Big lights hits differently at the cheekbones than at the neck. Creates a sort of disembodied face.

  131. 131.

    Another Scott

    August 25, 2020 at 9:36 pm

    @Steeplejack: This is the same party that thought letting Pat Buchanan speak in 1992 was a good idea.

    Cheers,
    Scott.

  132. 132.

    SiubhanDuinne

    August 25, 2020 at 9:36 pm

    @Yutsano:

    Bless his heart.

    Well done. Usually Canadians who live in the PNW have trouble pulling that off.

  133. 133.

    MomSense

    August 25, 2020 at 9:36 pm

    @Suzanne:

    That was horrible.

  134. 134.

    Morzer

    August 25, 2020 at 9:36 pm

    @MomSense:

    Pam Bondi knows what corruption looks like.

     

    She sees it in the mirror every day.

  135. 135.

    Steeplejack

    August 25, 2020 at 9:37 pm

    Tiffany Trump! There’s a self-made woman. I want to hear what she has to say. Mostly why she decided to get back on the Titanic.

  136. 136.

    MomSense

    August 25, 2020 at 9:37 pm

    This is trumps binders full of women like kellyanne and Sarah Sanders and Guilfoyle.

    Tiffany!  Drink!

  137. 137.

    HumboldtBlue

    August 25, 2020 at 9:37 pm

    @MomSense:

    Hahahahahaha

    We’re back in the theater with all this fucking projection.

  138. 138.

    Morzer

    August 25, 2020 at 9:37 pm

    @MomSense: Gargling Trump Bleach?

  139. 139.

    Luciamia

    August 25, 2020 at 9:38 pm

    @Steeplejack: bring back prayer!

  140. 140.

    Leto

    August 25, 2020 at 9:38 pm

    Tiffany who? Anyone know who this is? Does Donald know this person?

  141. 141.

    MomSense

    August 25, 2020 at 9:38 pm

    More bumper stickers.
    They are really pushing criminal justice reform tonight.

  142. 142.

    Aleta

    August 25, 2020 at 9:39 pm

    Thank you sir for all these things you’ve done using the word women.

    Also I thought Jared managed the campaign?

  143. 143.

    Ken

    August 25, 2020 at 9:39 pm

    @Winston: Yeah, it turns out the reason that kids didn’t seem to be getting coronavirus is they were all sheltering at home. Now that they’re being exposed, they’re just as likely to get the disease as adults.

  144. 144.

    Leto

    August 25, 2020 at 9:39 pm

    @MomSense: It’s amazing (not really) that all of these women basically look the same. Like, plug and play the same. This is what Pam Bondi looked like 15 years ago, and Pam is what Tiffany will look like in 10.

    Edit: she also talks out the side of her mouth. Weird.

  145. 145.

    Quinerly

    August 25, 2020 at 9:41 pm

    So is Tiffany still off limits?

    Does anyone doubt her allegiance?

  146. 146.

    Steeplejack

    August 25, 2020 at 9:42 pm

    Okay, I’m going to play my sexist-comment pass card for tonight. I haven’t heard Tiffany speak before, and her makeup, voice, inflections and affect make her come across like a blow-up doll version of Ivanka. ?

  147. 147.

    dmsilev

    August 25, 2020 at 9:42 pm

    So, I’m gathering from these comments that the promised happy uplifting convention might be falling just a tad short of what was sold?

  148. 148.

    Suzanne

    August 25, 2020 at 9:42 pm

    Where would these women be without the Beachwaver?

  149. 149.

    HumboldtBlue

    August 25, 2020 at 9:42 pm

    Those fucking choppers have her lisping like a drunken sailor during Fleet Week.

    She’s just spouting nonsense but I guess that’s the goal.

    Next we get the Nancy Reagan wannabe Pez dispenser-head lady who has tens of thousanda of constituents without basic public service and who today annopunced some of them will just have to go it alone.

  150. 150.

    Leto

    August 25, 2020 at 9:43 pm

    @Quinerly: *Checks with the refs*

    FAIR GAME! PLAY BALL!

  151. 151.

    Mike in NC

    August 25, 2020 at 9:43 pm

    @Steeplejack: Recall that one of Cohen’s jobs was to arrange for abortions for the women Fat Bastard impregnated.

  152. 152.

    MomSense

    August 25, 2020 at 9:43 pm

    Cancel culture is ruining our schools- killing diversity of ideas.

    I believe in miracles. Where you from? You sexy thing.  I believe in miracles.

    Her speech about miracles is really boring so I jazzed it up.

  153. 153.

    Amir Khalid

    August 25, 2020 at 9:43 pm

    I am impressed to see that Tiff Trump knows all the platitudes, and uses them enthusiastically.

  154. 154.

    SiubhanDuinne

    August 25, 2020 at 9:44 pm

    Iowa is the birthplace of the computer?

  155. 155.

    MomSense

    August 25, 2020 at 9:44 pm

    @HumboldtBlue:

    She looks like a bush baby.  I’m trying not to be mean but she really does.

  156. 156.

    Steeplejack

    August 25, 2020 at 9:44 pm

    Kim Reynolds, governor of Iowa. “Iowa truly is a land of opportunity.” Unless you recently got blown off the map by the derecho. In that case, sucks to be you.

  157. 157.

    NotMax

    August 25, 2020 at 9:44 pm

    @Leto

    Extra-strength Botox.

    //

  158. 158.

    Eljai

    August 25, 2020 at 9:44 pm

    @MomSense: I like your version better!

  159. 159.

    MomSense

    August 25, 2020 at 9:45 pm

    Kim Reynolds loves farms and single mothers but hates storms.

  160. 160.

    Steeplejack

    August 25, 2020 at 9:45 pm

    “What happens when a storm rips through the state?” Please tell us, Kim. I bet Donald Trump managed to help somehow.

    Called it!

  161. 161.

    Stacib

    August 25, 2020 at 9:45 pm

    @Amir Khalid: It’s the only way to stay in the will.

  162. 162.

    Morzer

    August 25, 2020 at 9:45 pm

    @Steeplejack: She’s the blow-up doll version of the blow-up doll? That’s meta, even for Trumpworld.

  163. 163.

    Suzanne

    August 25, 2020 at 9:45 pm

    @Steeplejack: I was thinking that I think Tiffany is prettier than Ivanka. Ivanka looks somehow asymmetrical or disproportionate to me. Not quite as bad as Sarah Sanders, who looked like a freaking Picasso. But Ivanka’s features seem like the wrong proportion or wrong place for her face.

  164. 164.

    HumboldtBlue

    August 25, 2020 at 9:46 pm

    @MomSense:

    Yeah, she has a doll-quality look with that odd-shaped head.

  165. 165.

    Redshift

    August 25, 2020 at 9:46 pm

    Hey, that floating dumpster fire is from my trash collection company!

  166. 166.

    Ken

    August 25, 2020 at 9:46 pm

    @Steeplejack: Especially sucks if you’re in one of the counties that’s not getting federal disaster aid.  Someone predicted earlier today that Trump will “generously” authorize the aid tonight.

  167. 167.

    Leto

    August 25, 2020 at 9:46 pm

    “The Trumpov Administration was here in full force.”

    So he was there with a paper towel cannon? That’s about the extent of Trumpov help.

  168. 168.

    Steeplejack

    August 25, 2020 at 9:46 pm

    I want to see this bitch fact-checked. Lots of government “declarations” and “Trump has our back,” no mention of funding amounts or disposition.

  169. 169.

    Chetan Murthy

    August 25, 2020 at 9:48 pm

    Man, Trumpov sure has a *type* don’t me?  I saw a pic of Bondi, and thought “wait, that look like Nielsen, the ex-DHS secy goon”.

  170. 170.

    Morzer

    August 25, 2020 at 9:48 pm

    @Steeplejack: Is it really fair to ask fact-checkers to lay down their lives for the nation?

  171. 171.

    MomSense

    August 25, 2020 at 9:48 pm

    @Steeplejack:

    HA!

    The themes of this night are all over the map.  Feels like they think they need to firm up support in their base and they’re hoping to pick up support from black men over the crime bill but they also need to support cops.  It’s a tight spot.

  172. 172.

    Steeplejack

    August 25, 2020 at 9:48 pm

    Montage: Mike Pence. Where is this going? I think Mother is actually scheduled to be a speaker. Could this be her walk-up music?

    “Fellow Hoosier” with Lincoln?! Lincoln was burn in Kentucky, you idiot.

  173. 173.

    Morzer

    August 25, 2020 at 9:48 pm

    @Chetan Murthy: Corn-fed, big-haired, bigoted blonde.

  174. 174.

    Eljai

    August 25, 2020 at 9:48 pm

    @Steeplejack: Let’s hear what Puerto Rico has to say about quick disaster relief under this clown.

  175. 175.

    Steeplejack

    August 25, 2020 at 9:49 pm

    Okay, I need to get another drink. Make it a double, barkeep.

  176. 176.

    MomSense

    August 25, 2020 at 9:49 pm

    Dense with video of Lincoln and Mt Rushmore with sappy movie music.

    ETA more school choice

  177. 177.

    SiubhanDuinne

    August 25, 2020 at 9:49 pm

    @Suzanne:

    They both look pretty vapid AFAIC.

  178. 178.

    NotMax

    August 25, 2020 at 9:50 pm

    @Leto

    Regional accent or misreading the word farce on the speech machine?

  179. 179.

    Ken

    August 25, 2020 at 9:50 pm

    @MomSense: Kim Reynolds loves farms and single mothers but hates storms.

    I used to be good at this game.  Hmm, can’t be the letters “rms” because they all have those, not double letters – is it that she only likes words/phrases with exactly one “a” or “i”?

  180. 180.

    Stacib

    August 25, 2020 at 9:50 pm

    @Steeplejack: I live near the IN / IL state line. There is a HUGE sign claiming IN as the Land of Lincoln.

  181. 181.

    Steeplejack

    August 25, 2020 at 9:51 pm

    Jack, this “eight-year-old from Wisconsin,” is the first person I have seen tonight that I don’t want to punch in the face. Some kind of special-needs case, I didn’t catch it.

    Now a kid with a “fatal illness.” Pence’s words, not mine! But he gets to try experimental treatments. If only we had something like that for COVID-19.

  182. 182.

    MomSense

    August 25, 2020 at 9:51 pm

    @Steeplejack:

    He said NEAR Indiana NEAR.  This is nuts. Now he’s on Right to Try and they got a kid to call trump a hero. Barf

  183. 183.

    Sister Golden Bear

    August 25, 2020 at 9:52 pm

    @Steeplejack: Hoarse Whisper had the right idea: a bandolier of little airplane booze bottles.

  184. 184.

    Ken

    August 25, 2020 at 9:52 pm

    @Steeplejack: I want to see this bitch fact-checked.

    If you mean Reynolds, I posted the link to the Des Moines Register article where she already said many Iowa counties won’t be seeing a dime of disaster relief. She may have taped her piece before finding that out, or she may just be lying.

  185. 185.

    cain

    August 25, 2020 at 9:52 pm

    @Stacib:

    If memory serves, he did spend quite some time in Indiana.

  186. 186.

    Leto

    August 25, 2020 at 9:52 pm

    Does MOTHER know he sat that close to another woman? His face is saying, “OMG, GET ME THE HELL OUT OF HERE” or “I really need to poop”. Maybe it’s both?

    Edit: he looks happier talking to this guy. His face is visibly happier.

  187. 187.

    MomSense

    August 25, 2020 at 9:52 pm

    Jesus fucking Indiana Christ can we please ban fifth rate composers from trying to copy Aaron Copeland?  Can’t you find someone else to dishonor?

  188. 188.

    cain

    August 25, 2020 at 9:53 pm

    @Ken: If you mean Reynolds, I posted the link to the Des Moines Register article where she already said many Iowa counties won’t be seeing a dime of disaster relief. She may have taped her piece before finding that out, or she may just be lying.

    Trump spent all that golfing. Oops.

  189. 189.

    tokyokie

    August 25, 2020 at 9:53 pm

    @MomSense:

    Wait what?  747s full of cash?

    I’d be happy with a Cessna full of cash. Maybe that’s why I’m not a Republican.

  190. 190.

    NotMax

    August 25, 2020 at 9:53 pm

    @Steeplejack

    Did you see the link downstairs for the solitaire?

  191. 191.

    Steeplejack

    August 25, 2020 at 9:54 pm

    Pence still bloviating. Glad I didn’t miss anything.

  192. 192.

    MomSense

    August 25, 2020 at 9:54 pm

    @tokyokie:

    I’d settle for a smart car full.

  193. 193.

    Aleta

    August 25, 2020 at 9:55 pm

    Phoned my Reps,  asked them to make a law outlawing Pence’s voice on all future broadcasts forever and ever.

  194. 194.

    MomSense

    August 25, 2020 at 9:55 pm

    Dense is so fucking boring.

  195. 195.

    NotMax

    August 25, 2020 at 9:55 pm

    @MomSense

    Theme for the 1% Man, uses only the white keys on the piano.

    //

  196. 196.

    Leto

    August 25, 2020 at 9:56 pm

    @NotMax: My autocorrect can only spell his name one way.

  197. 197.

    MomSense

    August 25, 2020 at 9:56 pm

    Did he ease up on the Botox so he could do a concern furrow his brow when a PPP recipient tells him how blessed they are to live in America.

  198. 198.

    stacib

    August 25, 2020 at 9:57 pm

    @cain: I know.  I think it’s hilarious that both IL and IN claim to be the “Land of Lincoln”.  I’ll have to take a trip to KY to see what they say. :-)

  199. 199.

    Steeplejack

    August 25, 2020 at 9:57 pm

    Ryan Holets, police officer from Albuquerque, NM. Heartwarming story of intervening with homeless drug addicts who apparently he was not forced to shoot.

  200. 200.

    WaterGirl

    August 25, 2020 at 9:57 pm

    @Steeplejack:

    Kimberly Guilfoyle: “I don’t want the job because I’m a woman. I want the job because I’m the best person for the job.” Which is why I’m getting $15,000 a month to be Don Jr.’s girlfriend.

    I just wanted to see that again.

  201. 201.

    Leto

    August 25, 2020 at 9:58 pm

    @MomSense: Oh, that was Mike Dense? I thought that was a can of creamed corn with a tie.

  202. 202.

    MomSense

    August 25, 2020 at 9:58 pm

    @NotMax:

    HA!

     

    ok now they are going to efficiently pick one guy to cover all the demos. White cop adopted baby of addict Crystal.

  203. 203.

    Aleta

    August 25, 2020 at 9:58 pm

    Is this the guy who talked her into giving him her baby?

    ok, yes it is.  how is that legal for a policeman in power over someone to do.

  204. 204.

    Amir Khalid

    August 25, 2020 at 10:00 pm

    @MomSense:

    We must have some kind of psychic connection, you and I. I just had that very same thought about Copeland-imitating hacks.

  205. 205.

    MomSense

    August 25, 2020 at 10:00 pm

    Last night was cocaine fueled and tonight is a snooze fest.

  206. 206.

    Ken

    August 25, 2020 at 10:00 pm

    @Aleta: It’s not child trafficking when the cops do it?

  207. 207.

    Redshift

    August 25, 2020 at 10:01 pm

    @Mary G:

    I started to try to watch; there was a guy from the Navajo Nation, but the sound and the picture were so far out of sync I had to stop. 

    We weren’t intending to watch, but we were watching Rachel’s intro when it switched over to that, so I caught most of it. His “praise Trump” address was so obviously ludicrous I looked up a couple of points, but you could do an entire fact-checking column on that one five-minute speech.

    He praised Trump for “reestablishing” the White House Council for Native American Affairs. You will be unsurprised to find out that it was established by Barack Obama in 2013, and went “dormant” in January 2019, and was only reactivated in April. (And when it was reactivated, the top Native official working at the White House was made its executive director and booted out of the White House to the Bureau of Indian Affairs. During a pandemic.

    Then the praise for Dear Leader giving him all the credit for delivering lots of money to Indian Country through the CARES Act…

    As many people explained to political newbies on social media last night, minority speakers at the RNC aren’t there to “reach out” to minority voters. They’re there to convince white people they’re not racist for voting Republican. This was more of the same, since I doubt many Native people are going to be convinced to ignore their lying eyes and believe Trump did great things for them during the pandemic.

    Nobody escapes the Trump orbit with their dignity intact.

  208. 208.

    MomSense

    August 25, 2020 at 10:01 pm

    @Amir Khalid:

    I’m so glad I’m not the only one!

  209. 209.

    WaterGirl

    August 25, 2020 at 10:02 pm

    @Redshift: That’s really funny!

  210. 210.

    Aleta

    August 25, 2020 at 10:02 pm

    Are they alternating the blonde with the brown-haired women speakers?

  211. 211.

    Leto

    August 25, 2020 at 10:02 pm

    My, what big teeth and eyes you have, Lt Gov Nunez.

    Also I’m glad that we’ll forever have Cuba to be scared of. Surprised they’re not showing the original Red Dawn and claiming this is Joe Biden’s America.

  212. 212.

    Steeplejack

    August 25, 2020 at 10:02 pm

    Jeanette Nuñez, lieutenant governor of the (“great state of”) Florida. Michele Bachmann crazy eyes—not quite, but almost.

    “I’m a Cuban immigrant. Socialism bad.” Next.

  213. 213.

    Kent

    August 25, 2020 at 10:02 pm

    The eyes on these GOP women just scare me.  Cold, harsh, and empty, every one of them.

    Very scary.

  214. 214.

    MomSense

    August 25, 2020 at 10:02 pm

    This bug eyed Cuban lady hates socialism.  St. Ronnie quote. Drink!

  215. 215.

    NotMax

    August 25, 2020 at 10:03 pm

    @Leto

    Vivid demonstration of the difference between “Who’s your daddy” and “Hoosier daddy.”

    //

  216. 216.

    Kent

    August 25, 2020 at 10:03 pm

    @Aleta:Are they alternating the blonde with the brown-haired women speakers?

    Diversity!

  217. 217.

    Omnes Omnibus

    August 25, 2020 at 10:04 pm

    @MomSense: After the high comes the crash.

  218. 218.

    Leto

    August 25, 2020 at 10:04 pm

    @MomSense: Well when you let Jr imitate Jack Black’s character from the end of Tropic Thunder, this is what you get.

  219. 219.

    HumboldtBlue

    August 25, 2020 at 10:04 pm

    @Kent:

    Every single one.

  220. 220.

    slightly_peeved

    August 25, 2020 at 10:04 pm

    @Steeplejack:

    Was the lobsterman here just because Trump had to one-up the calamari ninja?

  221. 221.

    Jinchi

    August 25, 2020 at 10:04 pm

    @cain: If memory serves,

    Memory! I knew we had some older commenters at BJ, but if you remember Lincoln, I salute your good genes.

  222. 222.

    Steeplejack

    August 25, 2020 at 10:04 pm

    @Suzanne:

    All of Tiffany’s features are round: round face, round, plump cheeks, round mouth. And her 1980s Farrah Fawcett-adjacent hairdo does not help at all.

  223. 223.

    MomSense

    August 25, 2020 at 10:05 pm

    Woops her pronunciation sounded a little too Spanishey there.  Wouldn’t want to alienate the Karens.  They hate it when people speak Spanish.

  224. 224.

    Aleta

    August 25, 2020 at 10:05 pm

    There’s no one who can write like HST would have about this convention.  It’s a loss for the country.  And he’d be definitive about what drugs they are taking.

  225. 225.

    dnfree

    August 25, 2020 at 10:05 pm

    Dark road of chaos and government control, warns the lieutenant governor of Florida. She says Trump has confronted tyrants. Maybe some tyrants? Certainly not all.

  226. 226.

    Quinerly

    August 25, 2020 at 10:06 pm

    @MomSense: what would this convention been like if Bernie woulda won the nomination? ?

    And, yes, she is quite bug eyed.

  227. 227.

    Aleta

    August 25, 2020 at 10:06 pm

    @Steeplejack:  She was like a mermaid sent from heaven to warn us.

  228. 228.

    HumboldtBlue

    August 25, 2020 at 10:06 pm

    Here’s captain dumbass!

    The guy who is his position illegally is now using brown people as props for the lumbering block of cheese.

  229. 229.

    MomSense

    August 25, 2020 at 10:06 pm

    Heil to the Chief and flag waving. A naturalization ceremony?

  230. 230.

    Ken

    August 25, 2020 at 10:06 pm

    Some years ago, someone compared the Trump administration to a whole bunch of cockroaches that formed a pyramid to turn on the kitchen light – meaning they were all doing fine at their grifts and crimes because the media wasn’t paying attention, but then got out in public.

    Any candidates for that list tonight?  The Wisconsin dairy farmers sound possible, what with the disputes with their neighbors and quality issues. Maybe the cop, depending on the circumstances of that baby?  Other nominations?

  231. 231.

    WaterGirl

    August 25, 2020 at 10:07 pm

    @Aleta: HST?

  232. 232.

    Steeplejack

    August 25, 2020 at 10:07 pm

    The president! But at some prerecorded event.

    Five candidates for naturalization. Oath administered by some minion while Trump stands by looking presidential.

    The five look like hostage-video participants. Checking for Morse code eye-blinks.

  233. 233.

    MomSense

    August 25, 2020 at 10:07 pm

    @Quinerly:

    More Cubans!

  234. 234.

    Aleta

    August 25, 2020 at 10:07 pm

    They should be arrested for indecency, hypocrisy and crimes against humanity for doing this.

  235. 235.

    Quinerly

    August 25, 2020 at 10:08 pm

    @Kent: no souls.

    True story.

  236. 236.

    zhena gogolia

    August 25, 2020 at 10:08 pm

    @WaterGirl:

    Hunter S. Thompson, not Harry Truman, I assume.

  237. 237.

    Amir Khalid

    August 25, 2020 at 10:08 pm

    “Socialist takeover”? What is she talking about? Biden/Harris and the Democratic party are centre-right.

  238. 238.

    HumboldtBlue

    August 25, 2020 at 10:08 pm

    @WaterGirl:

    Truman?

  239. 239.

    MomSense

    August 25, 2020 at 10:08 pm

    Trump’s stance is really wooden tonight.  It’s like his arms are screwed on wrong.

  240. 240.

    Ken

    August 25, 2020 at 10:08 pm

    @dnfree: She says Trump has confronted tyrants.

    As I recall, his line was “Where’s my favorite dictator?”  Which is not quite what I understood by “confront”, but perhaps there are nuances that I don’t appreciate.

  241. 241.

    Steeplejack

    August 25, 2020 at 10:09 pm

    Is this minion DHS Chad? Is their citizenship legal if they get the oath from someone in his post illegally? ?

  242. 242.

    Ken

    August 25, 2020 at 10:09 pm

    @Steeplejack: Five candidates for naturalization. Oath administered by some minion while Trump stands by looking presidential.

    He just stands there, while foreigners come in and take our jobs?

  243. 243.

    NotMax

    August 25, 2020 at 10:10 pm

    @Aleta

    Truman was a connoisseur of drugs? Who knew?

    :)

  244. 244.

    Amir Khalid

    August 25, 2020 at 10:10 pm

    He’s swearing in new citizens now. “See, I can too be presidential, so there!”

  245. 245.

    Sister Golden Bear

    August 25, 2020 at 10:10 pm

    @Steeplejack:

    Five candidates for naturalization. Oath administered by some minion while Trump stands by looking presidential.

    The anti-immigrant President is making some immigrants citizens.? I knew it was the wrong week to stop taking acid.

  246. 246.

    MomSense

    August 25, 2020 at 10:11 pm

    God I hate his mouth.  Is he mocking this guy with the way he over pronounces his name or is there just something wrong with his mouth?

  247. 247.

    James E Powell

    August 25, 2020 at 10:11 pm

    @dnfree:

    She says Trump has confronted tyrants.

    She means Hillary Clinton and Nancy Pelosi.

  248. 248.

    MomSense

    August 25, 2020 at 10:11 pm

    This new citizen speaks too many languages – the Karens will hate this part.

  249. 249.

    Aleta

    August 25, 2020 at 10:11 pm

    @WaterGirl: Hunter Thompson.  Covered some elections and Nixon.  ’68 and one other.  Wrote about Bush Sr. and the CIA and Iran Contra when Bush was running for Pres.

  250. 250.

    Jinchi

    August 25, 2020 at 10:12 pm

    @Sister Golden Bear: The anti-immigrant President is making some immigrants citizens.?

    Which East European country are they from?

  251. 251.

    Steeplejack

    August 25, 2020 at 10:12 pm

    @Stacib:

    I thought Illinois is the land of Lincoln. Isn’t it even on the license plates? That makes it bona fide.

  252. 252.

    MomSense

    August 25, 2020 at 10:12 pm

    The apples of your light?  He just asked this woman if her kids are the apple of her light.
    The balance is tipped too far to Benzos.

  253. 253.

    Jinchi

    August 25, 2020 at 10:13 pm

    @Steeplejack: So New Jersey really is the garden state?

  254. 254.

    Leto

    August 25, 2020 at 10:13 pm

    @MomSense: He can barely speak English, trying to get him to say anything other than, “BIGLY”, is a challenge. He’s probably seeing these words for the first time, so he’s sounding them out in real time.

  255. 255.

    Steeplejack

    August 25, 2020 at 10:13 pm

    @MomSense:

    I’m pretty sure Pence said “fellow Hoosier.” That’s sort of unambiguous.

  256. 256.

    MomSense

    August 25, 2020 at 10:14 pm

    Is this just his Biff Tannen nature or is he mocking these people?

  257. 257.

    Steeplejack

    August 25, 2020 at 10:14 pm

    @Sister Golden Bear:

    I’ve been buying in bulk since 2017. I keep asking the guy at the liquor store what’s bigger than a hogshead.

  258. 258.

    Quinerly

    August 25, 2020 at 10:14 pm

    @MomSense: I find this segment the most disturbing of the 2 nights.

  259. 259.

    MomSense

    August 25, 2020 at 10:14 pm

    @Steeplejack:

    I had  a hard time paying attention.  The guy is DULL

  260. 260.

    Steeplejack

    August 25, 2020 at 10:15 pm

    Eric Trump. Drink drink drink.

  261. 261.

    TS (the original)

    August 25, 2020 at 10:15 pm

    @Steeplejack:

    The five look like hostage-video participants.

    Like last night’s video from the White House.  Trump talks like a wooden horse – no idea why anyone with half a brain thinks he is a leader – of anything except his woe begotten family.

    I chanced a look on MSNBC – ahhhhhhh

  262. 262.

    Steeplejack

    August 25, 2020 at 10:15 pm

    At least no spread collar.

  263. 263.

    MomSense

    August 25, 2020 at 10:16 pm

    And it’s Eric.  Scruff is not a good look on him.

  264. 264.

    Aleta

    August 25, 2020 at 10:16 pm

    ‘Pledge your undying loyalty’  …

  265. 265.

    NotMax

    August 25, 2020 at 10:16 pm

    @Sister Golden Bear

    With 180,000 dead – and counting – “We’re full” is no longer 100% operative. (ref., WaPo link)

    //

  266. 266.

    Leto

    August 25, 2020 at 10:16 pm

    So regarding his posture, the reason it’s so bad is two parts: 1) he has no core muscles. You gotta have those. 2) weak hip flexors. Those two together help you stand straight. I know a lot more about that since my accident because I’m having to actively work against looking like that.

    And now Gilbert Gotfried is up.

  267. 267.

    Eljai

    August 25, 2020 at 10:16 pm

    I think this is the same speech his brother gave last night.  How embarrassing.

  268. 268.

    MomSense

    August 25, 2020 at 10:17 pm

    Democrats don’t want the pledge and they don’t want one nation under god.
    St Ronnie quote. Drink!

  269. 269.

    Ken

    August 25, 2020 at 10:17 pm

    @Steeplejack: Yes, Illinois is the “Land of Lincoln”, though he was born in Kentucky, and before either Illinois or Indiana was made a state.

  270. 270.

    Steeplejack

    August 25, 2020 at 10:17 pm

    @NotMax:

    Thanks, I’ll get to it after I get done live-drinking the RNC. Don’t suppose you’ve got similar for old Minesweeper, which Win10 also fucked up?

  271. 271.

    MomSense

    August 25, 2020 at 10:17 pm

    Fly over states MAGA banners and flags.

    Oh my.

  272. 272.

    Leto

    August 25, 2020 at 10:18 pm

    @Aleta: I caught that too, immediately yelled, “FUCK OFF!” That’s not the oath I took. That’s some Fuhrer pledge shit there.

  273. 273.

    Amir Khalid

    August 25, 2020 at 10:18 pm

    This commingling of presidential duties and campaigning doesn’t feel quite on the up-and-up.

  274. 274.

    Quinerly

    August 25, 2020 at 10:18 pm

    @Steeplejack: both sons have beards now. I read somewhere that Trump hated beards.

    Just an observation.

  275. 275.

    WaterGirl

    August 25, 2020 at 10:19 pm

    @zhena gogolia: Ah, thank you.

  276. 276.

    MomSense

    August 25, 2020 at 10:19 pm

    America became the envy of the world! He’s getting a little heated up now, but still low energy. Sad!

  277. 277.

    WaterGirl

    August 25, 2020 at 10:19 pm

    @MomSense: So Trump is there in person tonight, just now speaking?

  278. 278.

    MomSense

    August 25, 2020 at 10:19 pm

    List of things!

  279. 279.

    Aleta

    August 25, 2020 at 10:20 pm

    They told Eric, “Keep your hands tight on the podium.  Don’t wave your hands don’t lift your arms, no V’s no heils.”

  280. 280.

    MomSense

    August 25, 2020 at 10:20 pm

    @WaterGirl:

    Nope.  Pre taped from the White House.

  281. 281.

    NotMax

    August 25, 2020 at 10:20 pm

    @Steeplejack

    Strangely enough, a butt.

    ;)

  282. 282.

    Quinerly

    August 25, 2020 at 10:20 pm

    @Amir Khalid: I said above… The swearing in ceremony has really disturbed me. I guess it could have been worse… It could have been in the Oval Office.

  283. 283.

    WaterGirl

    August 25, 2020 at 10:20 pm

    @James E Powell:

    She means Hillary Clinton and Nancy Pelosi.

    That was good for a laugh out loud.  Literally.

  284. 284.

    Sister Golden Bear

    August 25, 2020 at 10:20 pm

    @NotMax: If Chad Wolf is not the legitimate acting DHS secretary, do these citizenship rights disappear? Not snarking.

  285. 285.

    WaterGirl

    August 25, 2020 at 10:21 pm

    @MomSense: I’m sure he meant apple of your eye.  He really is in bad shape.

  286. 286.

    Ken

    August 25, 2020 at 10:21 pm

    @Sister Golden Bear: Shhh!  That’s the surprise for the fourth night of the convention.

  287. 287.

    Steeplejack

    August 25, 2020 at 10:22 pm

    I would be in favor of giving Eric a little cocaine to goose up his delivery.

  288. 288.

    Redshift

    August 25, 2020 at 10:22 pm

    @Steeplejack:

    Jason Joyce, lobsterman from Swan’s Island, ME. Weird story: Obama and Biden put some fishing grounds off limits. Even though we lobstermen don’t fish there, it offended us greatly. No input from stakeholders, etc. Trump rescinded those orders. Yay! (Implied? And now we will fish the hell out of those grounds.) 

    The lobster thing has come up before, a few months ago, I think? Unsurprisingly, it’s a lie, too. If they didn’t lie, they wouldn’t have any accomplishments to talk about at all.

  289. 289.

    Leto

    August 25, 2020 at 10:22 pm

    It’s interesting that he’s never called him, “My dad/My father”… it’s always, “President Trumpov”.

  290. 290.

    MomSense

    August 25, 2020 at 10:22 pm

    My Rushmore and Gettysburg randomly invoked.
    More St. Ronnie!  Drink!
    I’m pounding seltzer and eating gummy bears.

  291. 291.

    Chris Johnson

    August 25, 2020 at 10:22 pm

    @Leto: And now Gilbert Gotfried is up.

    Literally or metaphorically?

  292. 292.

    NotMax

    August 25, 2020 at 10:22 pm

    @Steeplejack

    Minesweeper is also included in the same installer.

  293. 293.

    Aleta

    August 25, 2020 at 10:23 pm

    I wonder what the Trump org. billed  the convention fund for Eric’s giant tie.

  294. 294.

    Aleta

    August 25, 2020 at 10:23 pm

    Choose me, Dad.

  295. 295.

    MomSense

    August 25, 2020 at 10:24 pm

    Dear Dad, it’s me Eric.  I miss working with you, but I’m so proud of you.  And forgotten men and women who are forgotten no more will never be forgotten.

  296. 296.

    WaterGirl

    August 25, 2020 at 10:24 pm

    @Steeplejack: I had never heard that term until last night, an dI had no idea what that even was.

    What is a spread collar?
    A spread collar has wider collar points that are angled outwards instead of pointing down.
    It suits men with slim or long faces, or anyone who appreciates a modern twist to traditional attire.
    Team the spread collar with a full or half Windsor tie knot, among the easiest tie knots to master.
  297. 297.

    Steeplejack

    August 25, 2020 at 10:24 pm

    @WaterGirl:

    Hunter S. Thompson.

  298. 298.

    MomSense

    August 25, 2020 at 10:24 pm

    @Aleta:

    HA!

  299. 299.

    Omnes Omnibus

    August 25, 2020 at 10:25 pm

    @Sister Golden Bear: If I were them, I would find a federal judge pronto.

  300. 300.

    Sister Golden Bear

    August 25, 2020 at 10:25 pm

    @Ken: I forgot it that takes time to assemble the cages.

  301. 301.

    Steeplejack

    August 25, 2020 at 10:26 pm

    Montage: Women saying stuff, I can’t get the theme.

    Clueless black woman: “To say we’re oppressed in America—how?”

  302. 302.

    Leto

    August 25, 2020 at 10:26 pm

    @Chris Johnson: Metaphorically; he looks similar, sounds similar. But his material is about 60 years out of style.

    @MomSense: LOL; ty for that :)

  303. 303.

    WaterGirl

    August 25, 2020 at 10:26 pm

    @Amir Khalid:

    This commingling of presidential duties and campaigning doesn’t feel quite on the up-and-up.

    That was born to be a rotating tag.

  304. 304.

    Leto

    August 25, 2020 at 10:27 pm

    @Aleta: Always the bankruptee, never the bankruptor.

  305. 305.

    HumboldtBlue

    August 25, 2020 at 10:27 pm

    Rachel called him Eric Prince, twice.

  306. 306.

    WaterGirl

    August 25, 2020 at 10:27 pm

    @MomSense: Huh.  I thought he was against taping.  I can’t keep up!

  307. 307.

    Mike in NC

    August 25, 2020 at 10:28 pm

    What kind of freak names his kids Barron and Tiffany?

  308. 308.

    Steeplejack

    August 25, 2020 at 10:28 pm

    Daniel Cameron, Kentucky attorney general. Maybe he can settle the Lincoln question.

    Yes! He says he was born just a few miles from Lincoln—in Kentucky, bitches!

    Mr. Cameron is that rare  thing, a black Republican.

  309. 309.

    WaterGirl

    August 25, 2020 at 10:28 pm

    @MomSense: Special gummy bears?  Or the kind kids can eat, too?

  310. 310.

    MomSense

    August 25, 2020 at 10:29 pm

    Kentucky AG was once MItch’s legal counsel. He loves history – especially statues.
    So mellow and then all of a sudden our western values are under assault!  When did that happen?

  311. 311.

    MomSense

    August 25, 2020 at 10:29 pm

    @WaterGirl:

    Plain old sugar ones.

  312. 312.

    NotMax

    August 25, 2020 at 10:31 pm

    @Sister Golden Bear

    Not anywhere close to well-versed enough in the law to begin to answer that.

  313. 313.

    MomSense

    August 25, 2020 at 10:31 pm

    He’s pissed at Biden for saying he ain’t black if he votes for trump.  Democrats just want to destroy jobs cancel people and kill unborn babies.

    Oh my god this guy is all cliches

  314. 314.

    Leto

    August 25, 2020 at 10:31 pm

    Can Pompeo be charged with violating the Hatch Act once we flush the orange turd?

  315. 315.

    dnfree

    August 25, 2020 at 10:32 pm

    @Aleta: and you don’t mean Harry S Truman, which was my first thought.

  316. 316.

    Ken

    August 25, 2020 at 10:32 pm

    I’m not understanding the planning here.  Typically the speakers are in increasing importance of the office – last week Obama made a point of switching with Harris, because conventionally he would have followed her.  But tonight they’ve had vice-president Pence, then Eric Trump, then the attorney general of Kentucky.

  317. 317.

    Aleta

    August 25, 2020 at 10:32 pm

    @Mike in NC:  Named after their godparents, an investment magazine and a jeweley store.

  318. 318.

    WaterGirl

    August 25, 2020 at 10:32 pm

    @MomSense: Oh, well. :-)  Probably for the best.  Can’t have you looking like half the folks from last night.

  319. 319.

    Steeplejack

    August 25, 2020 at 10:32 pm

    @Leto:

    Also shoe lifts tilting him forward.

  320. 320.

    Steeplejack

    August 25, 2020 at 10:33 pm

    Mike Pompeo! Speaking from “beautiful Jerusalem.”

    This is out of bounds for a sitting secretary of state to speak at a political convention. Shame!

  321. 321.

    NotMax

    August 25, 2020 at 10:33 pm

    @Mike in NC

    Eric missed being named Cartier by that much.

    //

  322. 322.

    lgerard

    August 25, 2020 at 10:34 pm

    @Mike in NC:

    Trump wanted to give Ivanka the name Tiffany, but Ivanna put her foot down and named her after herself, foiling that marketing effort.

  323. 323.

    Steeplejack

    August 25, 2020 at 10:35 pm

    @WaterGirl:

    EVERYTHING IS PRERECORDED!

  324. 324.

    Leto

    August 25, 2020 at 10:35 pm

    Sec of State bragging about killing people. Hooooooly fuck.

  325. 325.

    David ? ☘The Establishment☘? Koch

    August 25, 2020 at 10:36 pm

    @Mike in NC: Dump tower is literally next door to Tiffany Jewelers (lack of imagination).  It’s also a well known strippers name and he objectifies women.

    Dump has blubbered in the past about wanting to be Conrad Hilton’s son (W. Barron Hilton).  Sad!

  326. 326.

    WaterGirl

    August 25, 2020 at 10:37 pm

    @Steeplejack: Okay, then.

    Isn’t this thing over yet?

  327. 327.

    Steeplejack

    August 25, 2020 at 10:37 pm

    @NotMax:

    Cool, thanks.

  328. 328.

    MomSense

    August 25, 2020 at 10:37 pm

    Mike Pompeo from Jerusalem.

    He has a really big job- being dad and husband.  Aw shucks that false modesty is so sincere. His face is in a frozen sort of smile.  This guy does not know how to be pleasant.  Betcha he has a wicked temper.  Does anyone know?  I’m going with quick to rage.

    Hes fucking maintaining that weird smile while saying terrorist beheadings.

    This guy freaks me out.  Expressions do not match his words.  Totally frozen affect.

  329. 329.

    WaterGirl

    August 25, 2020 at 10:37 pm

    @Leto: Can you elaborate?

  330. 330.

    Aleta

    August 25, 2020 at 10:38 pm

    @NotMax: Probably named after the Swedish kings so DT could claim title.

  331. 331.

    David ? ☘The Establishment☘? Koch

    August 25, 2020 at 10:38 pm

    {{{GONG!}}}

  332. 332.

    MomSense

    August 25, 2020 at 10:38 pm

    Melanie in the rose garden with the kkk shrubs.  It’s a thing.

  333. 333.

    Amir Khalid

    August 25, 2020 at 10:38 pm

    @MomSense:

    Haribo don’t actually make “special” Gummibears, do they?

    I find it remarkable how … generic they sound, the life stories of these convention speakers. How perfunctory they are in telling their own stories.

  334. 334.

    Steeplejack

    August 25, 2020 at 10:38 pm

    MOTHER! With Pence. Could this be live? Rose Garden, outside. I think it is.

    And here comes the man himself! President Donald J. Trump.

  335. 335.

    WaterGirl

    August 25, 2020 at 10:38 pm

    @WaterGirl: I see that MomSense has.

    :: shudder ::

  336. 336.

    ?BillinGlendaleCA

    August 25, 2020 at 10:38 pm

    @David ? ☘The Establishment☘? Koch: Trump has used “John Barron” as one of his pseudonyms when talking to reporters.

  337. 337.

    Steeplejack

    August 25, 2020 at 10:38 pm

    Oh, God, it’s the setup for Melania. Trump taking a seat in the first row of the audience.

  338. 338.

    Aleta

    August 25, 2020 at 10:39 pm

    Mask free or and die

  339. 339.

    zhena gogolia

    August 25, 2020 at 10:39 pm

    @MomSense:

    I guess you forgot that time he started screaming at the reporter who dared to ask him a question on a topic he didn’t want to talk about?

  340. 340.

    Ken

    August 25, 2020 at 10:39 pm

    @Leto: Sec of State bragging about killing people.

    From the Holy City, yet.

  341. 341.

    MomSense

    August 25, 2020 at 10:39 pm

    He was supposed to escort her but they cut it.  He walked out alone instead

  342. 342.

    L85NJGT

    August 25, 2020 at 10:39 pm

    @Jinchi:

    You’d prefer “The Truck Farm State”?

  343. 343.

    WaterGirl

    August 25, 2020 at 10:39 pm

    @MomSense: KKK shrubs?  Dare I ask?

  344. 344.

    Steeplejack

    August 25, 2020 at 10:39 pm

    I can’t believe her accent is still so “is crazy moose and squirrel” after so many years in America. Isn’t she a genius or something?

  345. 345.

    Leto

    August 25, 2020 at 10:40 pm

    @WaterGirl: Basically just talking about how great is was that we killed Sulimani (the Iranian general), killed the “Islamic Caliphate”… I mean, it’s just he’s saying it so gleefully. It’s disturbing. It’s on brand.

    JFC, announcing the Third Lady they’re yelling at us; WHY ARE THEY ALWAYS YELLING AT US?!?! Now it’s a infomercial.

  346. 346.

    Steeplejack

    August 25, 2020 at 10:40 pm

    She hasn’t even started yet, and I feel sorry for her already. But then I remember she was an O.G. birther and the feeling goes away.

  347. 347.

    MomSense

    August 25, 2020 at 10:41 pm

    @zhena gogolia:

    I did forget.  He’s scary.  Do not like.

  348. 348.

    Ken

    August 25, 2020 at 10:41 pm

    @Steeplejack: IIRC she was admitted to the US under a “genius visa” program of some sort. There are questions as to whether she qualified.

  349. 349.

    gene108

    August 25, 2020 at 10:41 pm

    @SiubhanDuinne:

    Kinda sort of in the USA:

    Conceived in 1937, the machine was built by Iowa State Collegemathematics and physics professor John Vincent Atanasoff with the help of graduate student Clifford Berry. It was designed only to solve systems of linear equations and was successfully tested in 1942. However, its intermediate result storage mechanism, a paper card writer/reader, was not perfected, and when John Vincent Atanasoff left Iowa State College for World War II assignments, work on the machine was discontinued.[3] The ABC pioneered important elements of modern computing, including binary arithmetic and electronic switchingelements, [4] but its special-purpose nature and lack of a changeable, stored program distinguish it from modern computers. The computer was designated an IEEE Milestone in 1990.[5]

    https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Atanasoff–Berry_computer

  350. 350.

    ?BillinGlendaleCA

    August 25, 2020 at 10:41 pm

    @WaterGirl: All the roses are white, or off white.

  351. 351.

    Leto

    August 25, 2020 at 10:41 pm

    She’s walking… smiled, stopped smiling, smiled… stopped, smiled again… it’s like someone was flicking the switch on and off. Weird.

  352. 352.

    Aleta

    August 25, 2020 at 10:41 pm

    Defeated  those messy trees for all America

  353. 353.

    MomSense

    August 25, 2020 at 10:41 pm

    She’s walking down the entire colonnade- audience is struggling to maintain applause. How long is the fucking colonnade?

  354. 354.

    HumboldtBlue

    August 25, 2020 at 10:41 pm

    This is fucking disgusting.

    The only fucking reason they destroyed the Rose Garden was so this three-dollar-titty-bar-dancer wouldn’t get her heels stuck in the grass.

  355. 355.

    Mary G

    August 25, 2020 at 10:42 pm

    Zero social distancing in the Rose Garden, because one must court death in order to gain the approval of the Dear Leader.— Tom Nichols (@RadioFreeTom) August 26, 2020

  356. 356.

    MomSense

    August 25, 2020 at 10:42 pm

    She’s wearing an olive green shirt dress – straight out of Indiana Jones NAZI costume department.

  357. 357.

    Steeplejack

    August 25, 2020 at 10:42 pm

    @WaterGirl:

    Spread collar.

  358. 358.

    Another Scott

    August 25, 2020 at 10:42 pm

    @MomSense: He’s a bully.

    He tried to bully Mary-Louise Kelly and it didn’t go well.

    https://www.npr.org/2020/01/25/799562818/after-contentious-interview-pompeo-publicly-accuses-npr-journalist-of-lying-to-h

    Cheers,
    Scott.

  359. 359.

    WaterGirl

    August 25, 2020 at 10:43 pm

    @?BillinGlendaleCA: Ugh.  Of course they are.

  360. 360.

    Leto

    August 25, 2020 at 10:43 pm

    She definitely needs more teleprompter practice. She’s basically just staring at it, reading it. Or they need to give her the speech more than 45 mins out.

    “My deepest sympathy goes out…” said in that monotone, with those cold dead eyes.

  361. 361.

    MomSense

    August 25, 2020 at 10:43 pm

    No masks and no social distancing.  Must be nice to have enough tests.

  362. 362.

    WaterGirl

    August 25, 2020 at 10:43 pm

    @Leto: She does that all the time. It’s because she’s not actually smiling – she’s just moving her facial muscles.

  363. 363.

    MomSense

    August 25, 2020 at 10:43 pm

    She is praying for those who are eels.

  364. 364.

    NotMax

    August 25, 2020 at 10:43 pm

    @Ken

    Crusader Babbitt.

  365. 365.

    HumboldtBlue

    August 25, 2020 at 10:44 pm

    @MomSense:

    That’s straight East Germany 1980.

    Sweet fucking Jesus beating a Jew in a Cossack pogrom, not only does our presidency look like a cheap mob knock-off it comes with this fucking Natalia sounding dipshit.

  366. 366.

    Chetan Murthy

    August 25, 2020 at 10:44 pm

    @Leto:

    She’s walking… smiled, stopped smiling, smiled… stopped, smiled again

    As Laura Benanti so hilariously lampoons in her segments on Colbert, this *is* her genius skill.  A truly superlative model knows where the camera is, and instinctively turns to present the proper profile for a flattering shot …. every time.

  367. 367.

    Aleta

    August 25, 2020 at 10:44 pm

    putting the sad into the surreal

  368. 368.

    MomSense

    August 25, 2020 at 10:44 pm

    They need to upgrade the animatronic software.

  369. 369.

    WaterGirl

    August 25, 2020 at 10:44 pm

    @Steeplejack: Do all the spread collars come with a creepy Ken doll head?

  370. 370.

    gene108

    August 25, 2020 at 10:45 pm

    @SiubhanDuinne:

    Iowa is the birthplace of the computer?

    Kind of:

    Conceived in 1937, the machine was built by Iowa State College mathematics and physics professor John Vincent Atanasoff with the help of graduate student Clifford Berry. It was designed only to solve systems of linear equations and was successfully tested in 1942. However, its intermediate result storage mechanism, a paper card writer/reader, was not perfected, and when John Vincent Atanasoff left Iowa State College for World War II assignments, work on the machine was discontinued.[3] The ABC pioneered important elements of modern computing, including binary arithmetic and electronic switching elements, [4] but its special-purpose nature and lack of a changeable, stored program distinguish it from modern computers. The computer was designated an IEEE Milestone in 1990.[5]

    https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Atanasoff–Berry_computer

  371. 371.

    Steeplejack

    August 25, 2020 at 10:45 pm

    @WaterGirl:

    It ends at 11:00. Every night.

  372. 372.

    Quinerly

    August 25, 2020 at 10:45 pm

    @MomSense: crisp shoulder pads.

  373. 373.

    MomSense

    August 25, 2020 at 10:46 pm

    @HumboldtBlue:

    That’s it!

  374. 374.

    Steeplejack

    August 25, 2020 at 10:46 pm

    @WaterGirl:

    Terrorists.

  375. 375.

    ?BillinGlendaleCA

    August 25, 2020 at 10:47 pm

    @Steeplejack: It usually goes over 5 to 10 minutes, if we’re lucky.

  376. 376.

    HumboldtBlue

    August 25, 2020 at 10:47 pm

    This is really a scene from an Austin Powers movie, right? Right?

  377. 377.

    Leto

    August 25, 2020 at 10:48 pm

    @Chetan Murthy: Laura does an impeccable impression of her. As soon as the Third Lady started speaking, I started laughing, because Laura’s impression is just so spot on.

  378. 378.

    Amir Khalid

    August 25, 2020 at 10:48 pm

    At least this time she’s not plagiarising Michelle Obama’s speech.

  379. 379.

    Steeplejack

    August 25, 2020 at 10:48 pm

    Rose Garden chairs are socially distanced. No masks seen in brief crowd shot.

    Oh, we’re getting into some traditional convention stuff here—interruptions for clapping every so often.

    Melania not sounding so foreign. She’s getting into the Greta Garbo “I vant to be alone” zone.

  380. 380.

    Aleta

    August 25, 2020 at 10:49 pm

    The clearing of the Rose Garden has turned out to be fortuitous.

  381. 381.

    Mary G

    August 25, 2020 at 10:50 pm

    You know; it's bad when Ferdinand and Imelda Marcos had more class and taste than the Trumps. #RNCConvention2020— John Smith (son of Harry Leslie Smith) (@Harryslaststand) August 26, 2020

  382. 382.

    tokyokie

    August 25, 2020 at 10:50 pm

    @dnfree:

    Dark road of chaos and government control, warns the lieutenant governor of Florida. She says Trump has confronted tyrants.

    He only confronted them about the possibility of a Trump tower in their capital.

  383. 383.

    Sister Golden Bear

    August 25, 2020 at 10:51 pm

    The military outfit is a classy touch. //

  384. 384.

    MomSense

    August 25, 2020 at 10:52 pm

    Holy hell this is awful.  How is this real life?

  385. 385.

    WaterGirl

    August 25, 2020 at 10:52 pm

    @Steeplejack: That’s 3-1/2 hours!

  386. 386.

    Aleta

    August 25, 2020 at 10:53 pm

    And who could ever forget the story of all the little children my husband has locked up.

  387. 387.

    Jeffro

    August 25, 2020 at 10:53 pm

    @MomSense: Pompeo, Cotton, Hawley, Haley, Pence, and Don Jr…quite a field you’ve got there for 2024, QP!

  388. 388.

    Sister Golden Bear

    August 25, 2020 at 10:53 pm

    @MomSense: I think you need the special gummies STAT.

  389. 389.

    WaterGirl

    August 25, 2020 at 10:53 pm

    @Aleta:

    The clearing of the Rose Garden has turned out to be fortuitous.

    ?

  390. 390.

    Another Scott

    August 25, 2020 at 10:54 pm

    So many Hatch Act violations. Trump corrupts all he touches. The Office of Special Counsel will be busy.

    — Rep. Don Beyer (@RepDonBeyer) August 26, 2020

    Cheers,
    Scott.

  391. 391.

    Leto

    August 25, 2020 at 10:54 pm

    BE BEST! DRINK!

  392. 392.

    Steeplejack

    August 25, 2020 at 10:54 pm

    @WaterGirl:

    Yes. Like I said last night, Jared, Stephen Miller and I forget the third one.

  393. 393.

    MomSense

    August 25, 2020 at 10:54 pm

    @Sister Golden Bear:

    On a scale of 1 to Mussolini, how fascist does this event look?

  394. 394.

    Sister Machine Gun of Quiet Harmony

    August 25, 2020 at 10:54 pm

    @Baud: Bernie supporters aren’t watching.

  395. 395.

    Leto

    August 25, 2020 at 10:55 pm

    “Helping children…”  the fucking gall of this woman…

  396. 396.

    ?BillinGlendaleCA

    August 25, 2020 at 10:55 pm

    @WaterGirl: 2 1/2, it just seems longer.

  397. 397.

    Emma from FL

    August 25, 2020 at 10:56 pm

    @MomSense: Rally scene in Triumph of the Will. Every damned minute of it.

  398. 398.

    Steeplejack

    August 25, 2020 at 10:56 pm

    @WaterGirl:

    It’s 2½ hours: 8:30 to 11:00. Lots of montage filler and prerecorded speeches. Not hard to do. Hard to watch, yes. Drink drink drink.

  399. 399.

    MomSense

    August 25, 2020 at 10:57 pm

    ok now she’s talking about her trip to Africa where she did dress exactly like the blond NAZI from Indiana Jones

  400. 400.

    ?BillinGlendaleCA

    August 25, 2020 at 10:57 pm

    @Leto: They’re helping some children into cages.

  401. 401.

    Quinerly

    August 25, 2020 at 10:57 pm

    @MomSense: jarring.

    Entire night very disturbing.

    I prefer the coke fueled Mon night. Suddenly DJTJ’s girlfriend isn’t so scary anymore.

    Tonight has been horrifying.

  402. 402.

    MomSense

    August 25, 2020 at 10:58 pm

    They keep going to donald in the split screen and he looks like he’s falling asleep in the toilet.

  403. 403.

    Sister Golden Bear

    August 25, 2020 at 10:58 pm

    @Sister Machine Gun of Quiet Harmony: Can we arrange for them all to undergo the treatment scene in “A Clockwork Orange”?

  404. 404.

    MomSense

    August 25, 2020 at 10:59 pm

    @Quinerly:

    Me too.  This is over the top fascist staging.

  405. 405.

    Aleta

    August 25, 2020 at 10:59 pm

    I’m so proud of my husband.  Agree to be alone with him?  Never again.

  406. 406.

    ?BillinGlendaleCA

    August 25, 2020 at 10:59 pm

    @MomSense: Has he shit himself again?

  407. 407.

    Aleta

    August 25, 2020 at 11:00 pm

    @MomSense: The lighting feels fascist

  408. 408.

    NotMax

    August 25, 2020 at 11:00 pm

    @MomSense

    “The truth is that men are tired of liberty.”
    – Benito Mussolini
    .
    And another.

    “We become strong, I feel, when we have no friends upon whom to lean, or to look to for moral guidance.”
    – Benito Mussolini
    .

  409. 409.

    Steeplejack

    August 25, 2020 at 11:00 pm

    Melania is not disgracing herself. She’s just monotonous and boring. Let’s wrap this thing up.

    I will say that I have found the C-SPAN feed to be the best. Absolutely no filler, and they do a good job of identifying the speakers with quick chyrons. Also (apparently) identifying which parts are live, like Melania’s speech.

  410. 410.

    Bill Arnold

    August 25, 2020 at 11:01 pm

    @MomSense:

    Pam Bondi knows what corruption looks like. Bet she does.

    Why Trump’s Pam Bondi Scandal Isn’t Going Away (Shawn Tully, September 12, 2016)

    But now, Trump’s $25,000 gift to Florida’s attorney general is stirring a blizzard of controversy. Critics claim that the contribution swayed AG Pam Bondi’s decision not to investigate scandal-plagued, now-defunct Trump University.

  411. 411.

    Yutsano

    August 25, 2020 at 11:01 pm

    Oh good Lard. She’s terrible. Like she has no training in how to use a teleprompter. No presence. No emotion. And this babble about drug addiction is almost shade.

    EDIT: the fake applause lines are just gross.

  412. 412.

    Steeplejack

    August 25, 2020 at 11:02 pm

    “In my next four years as First Lady . . .” Oh, hell, no.

  413. 413.

    Aleta

    August 25, 2020 at 11:02 pm

    Imelda Marcos was a beauty queen

  414. 414.

    Tulip

    August 25, 2020 at 11:02 pm

    Jesus… will she ever stfu? Lying bitch.

  415. 415.

    Amir Khalid

    August 25, 2020 at 11:02 pm

    @MomSense:

    Funny how everything Melania wears looks like it’s from the discount racks at H&M.

  416. 416.

    MomSense

    August 25, 2020 at 11:03 pm

    oh god she wants to do more to restore the people’s house.
    Leave it the fuck alone.

     

    ok a special message to the mudders.

  417. 417.

    Aleta

    August 25, 2020 at 11:03 pm

    Oh god.  Leave the place alone.  Just leave it.

  418. 418.

    HumboldtBlue

    August 25, 2020 at 11:04 pm

    Da modders of this country?

    Is this Quadrophenia?

  419. 419.

    Quinerly

    August 25, 2020 at 11:04 pm

    @MomSense: I love to joke around, but I am more disturbed than usual tonight.

    Asking an honest and serious question… Are average people finding this as disturbing as we are? (I don’t know any average people?)

  420. 420.

    Sister Golden Bear

    August 25, 2020 at 11:04 pm

    @MomSense: Thursday night will begin with Air Force One descending through the clouds, its shadow visible as it passes over the tiny figures marching below, accompanied by an orchestral arrangement of the Horst-Wessel-Lied as it lands in Nuremberg, PA.

  421. 421.

    MomSense

    August 25, 2020 at 11:06 pm

    @Amir Khalid:

    There is a reason runway models don’t get new kidneys

  422. 422.

    Leto

    August 25, 2020 at 11:06 pm

    Her speech is like 2020 in that it just won’t fucking end. PLAY THE MUSIC ALREADY!

  423. 423.

    Amir Khalid

    August 25, 2020 at 11:06 pm

    I just clicked away from the PBS live feed on YouTube. I can’t take any more of this rubbish.

  424. 424.

    MomSense

    August 25, 2020 at 11:06 pm

    Total honesty?  Donald?  GTFO

  425. 425.

    ?BillinGlendaleCA

    August 25, 2020 at 11:06 pm

    @Quinerly: Most average people are  probably not watching and spending their time trying to figure out how to pay the rent next week.

  426. 426.

    Quinerly

    August 25, 2020 at 11:07 pm

    How many fucking times has she said, “my husband”?

  427. 427.

    HumboldtBlue

    August 25, 2020 at 11:07 pm

    @Quinerly:

    The people I think you are thinking of are not watching. They will get Facebook and FOX News clips to feast on and that feeds the base.

  428. 428.

    MomSense

    August 25, 2020 at 11:08 pm

    @Quinerly:

    I hope so.  This is nightmare fuel

  429. 429.

    Yutsano

    August 25, 2020 at 11:08 pm

    Oh thank Jeebus it’s over.

    WTF KIND OF KISS WAS THAT???

  430. 430.

    Leto

    August 25, 2020 at 11:08 pm

    Her cheek is oranger after the hug.

  431. 431.

    Calouste

    August 25, 2020 at 11:08 pm

    @MomSense: It’s not Right to Try. It’s Right to Try And Have Someone Else Pay For It. You know, socialism.

  432. 432.

    tokyokie

    August 25, 2020 at 11:08 pm

    @Emma from FL:

    Rally scene in Triumph of the Will. Every damned minute of it.

    Except with crappier production design and lousy cinematography. Leni Reifenstahl would be aghast at how slipshod this production is.

  433. 433.

    zhena gogolia

    August 25, 2020 at 11:09 pm

    @Quinerly:

    My theory? They don’t watch it. They don’t want to know. They just want to feel okay voting for Republicans. I guarantee you my neighbors are not watching it, but they’ll vote for him.

  434. 434.

    Aleta

    August 25, 2020 at 11:09 pm

    They didn’t clear the rose garden for drainage and disability access.  It was to get the shot.

  435. 435.

    MomSense

    August 25, 2020 at 11:09 pm

    Wolf called it a very moving speech?  As in move to Canada this is fucked

  436. 436.

    NotMax

    August 25, 2020 at 11:09 pm

    @Aleta

    Distinctly remember one snippet from an interview she gave on the capacious, precisely manicured lawn of the enormous palace-in-exile (shown in the background, with pristine beach and blue. blue ocean beyond) on Oahu.

    “Look around. This is Hell.”

  437. 437.

    HumboldtBlue

    August 25, 2020 at 11:10 pm

    @Leto:

    And he’s sweating like a pig as he always is.

  438. 438.

    Steeplejack

    August 25, 2020 at 11:10 pm

    Boom shot of the crowd waking up after the Trumps walk off. No masks, chairs semi-distanced, about three feet, not six. Looks like “every other seat” placement.

    Okay, over to the Crew on MSNBC.

  439. 439.

    MomSense

    August 25, 2020 at 11:10 pm

    @Aleta:

    Nope.  They did it to make a set for that disgrace.

  440. 440.

    frosty

    August 25, 2020 at 11:11 pm

    @Bill Arnold: Nice try by someone, but the Pam Bondi scandal did go away, just like all the others.

  441. 441.

    Leto

    August 25, 2020 at 11:13 pm

    @MomSense: And Joy Reid taking this entire shitshow to task. Specifically focusing on the naturalization ceremony because her mom was naturalized, and instead of it being about the recipients, it’s about him. And how fucking disgusting that is.

  442. 442.

    different-church-lady

    August 25, 2020 at 11:13 pm

    @Steeplejack: OK. Sure. But let me tell you something: Plantation 5 year.

  443. 443.

    Sister Machine Gun of Quiet Harmony

    August 25, 2020 at 11:14 pm

    @Sister Golden Bear: LOL.  I support that completely!

  444. 444.

    WaterGirl

    August 25, 2020 at 11:15 pm

    @Aleta: That’s the first thing BillinGlendaleCA said when we saw the newly redone Rose Garden.

    The photographer who is probably always mentally framing shots knew that immediately.  I am not watching so I don’t know, but it sounds like you are in complete agreement with BillinGlendaleCA.

  445. 445.

    NotMax

    August 25, 2020 at 11:16 pm

    @MomSense

    The free trial period on the rose bushes probably ends this weekend.

    “Hurry up and finish loading them. The nursery closes at 6.”

  446. 446.

    MomSense

    August 25, 2020 at 11:18 pm

    @Leto:

    Thank goodness because I’m a little freaked out.

  447. 447.

    Steeplejack

    August 25, 2020 at 11:18 pm

    @different-church-lady:

    Will check it out. I also like Barbancourt three-star, but Mount Gay is my usual.

  448. 448.

    MomSense

    August 25, 2020 at 11:19 pm

    @WaterGirl:

    They took out all those crab apple trees just to get that fucking walk on the colonnade.  I’m so furious right now.

  449. 449.

    zhena gogolia

    August 25, 2020 at 11:21 pm

    @MomSense:

    I hate them so much it is eating away at my soul. And I didn’t even watch it.

  450. 450.

    MomSense

    August 25, 2020 at 11:22 pm

    Can we just go back to one flag in the corner like in the old days before we had to make such a big show of loving the flag?

  451. 451.

    WaterGirl

    August 25, 2020 at 11:23 pm

    @MomSense:  We knew that as soon as we saw the photos, but clearly to folks watching tonight it was absolutely, undeniably obvious, which takes the anger from 10 on a scale of 10, to something higher.

    They are truly despicable, and it knows no bounds.

    He’s fucking campaigning from the white house and he destroyed a beautiful historic garden to do it.

  452. 452.

    MomSense

    August 25, 2020 at 11:24 pm

    @zhena gogolia:

    I know.  We have to figure out how to find out humanity again.

  453. 453.

    Amir Khalid

    August 25, 2020 at 11:24 pm

    Victoria Station (local steakhouse) said that if I walk in around 12:30pm, I should be able to get a table for one and enjoy my nice once-in-every-few-years steak. Yay!

  454. 454.

    zhena gogolia

    August 25, 2020 at 11:24 pm

    @MomSense:

    My husband is so sure Biden is going to become president. I wish I could channel that.

  455. 455.

    NotMax

    August 25, 2020 at 11:24 pm

    @MomSense

    And put a Chinese cut-rate flag factory out of business?

    //

  456. 456.

    MomSense

    August 25, 2020 at 11:25 pm

    @Amir Khalid:

    That’s wonderful!  Enjoy!

  457. 457.

    zhena gogolia

    August 25, 2020 at 11:25 pm

    @Amir Khalid:

    What cut did you decide on?

  458. 458.

    ?BillinGlendaleCA

    August 25, 2020 at 11:25 pm

    @WaterGirl: Pretty much, that’s why they got rid of the trees, they interfere with a clean shot.

  459. 459.

    ?BillinGlendaleCA

    August 25, 2020 at 11:26 pm

    @MomSense: Yup.

  460. 460.

    MomSense

    August 25, 2020 at 11:27 pm

    @NotMax:

    ????????????????????????????????????????????????????

  461. 461.

    MomSense

    August 25, 2020 at 11:30 pm

    @WaterGirl:

    They said they plan to replant them but I call BS.  You don’t transplant trees like that in the heat of July and August.  They won’t do well if they survive it.

  462. 462.

    MomSense

    August 25, 2020 at 11:31 pm

    Pompeo delivered his speech from the rooftop of the King David hotel.  Dear god.

  463. 463.

    NotMax

    August 25, 2020 at 11:32 pm

    @MomSense

    The areas with the suddenly appearing big golden planters at his hotel are air conditioned.

    //

  464. 464.

    Steeplejack

    August 25, 2020 at 11:33 pm

    @Amir Khalid:

    Enjoy! Let us know how it turns out. What side dishes, etc.

  465. 465.

    WaterGirl

    August 25, 2020 at 11:34 pm

    @?BillinGlendaleCA: Fuckers.

  466. 466.

    Aleta

    August 25, 2020 at 11:34 pm

    @MomSense: And to level the area for even rows of chairs.

  467. 467.

    WaterGirl

    August 25, 2020 at 11:35 pm

    @MomSense: The balls of the trees would have to be beyond HUGE to even have a chance of survival.  Yeah, and July and August are not when you would do it.

    They are lying like they lie about everything else.

  468. 468.

    WaterGirl

    August 25, 2020 at 11:36 pm

    @Aleta: I hate these people.

  469. 469.

    Aleta

    August 25, 2020 at 11:47 pm

    @WaterGirl: They spent tonight telling us they’re the party of Lincoln and women and little children, who loves immigrants, cares about prisoners and floats above racism.

  470. 470.

    Sister Golden Bear

    August 25, 2020 at 11:54 pm

    After seeing tonight’s speakers, I didn’t realize there are still that many Quaaludes left in existence.

  471. 471.

    Sally

    August 25, 2020 at 11:59 pm

    @khead: This sounds like it really should be Ivanka’s speech //

  472. 472.

    Amir Khalid

    August 26, 2020 at 12:02 am

    @zhena gogolia:

    T-bone, if they have it.

  473. 473.

    NotMax

    August 26, 2020 at 12:06 am

    @Amir Khalid

    Promise there will be no ketchup involved.

    ;)

  474. 474.

    Anya

    August 26, 2020 at 12:28 am

    @Quinerly: To me, she’s off limits because she’s like those countries Bush blackmailed into joining the “coalition of the willing” or as my dad used to call it, the coalition of the bribed and blackmailed. She’s like Estonia or Toga.

  475. 475.

    Chetan Murthy

    August 26, 2020 at 12:35 am

    @Anya: If I were an Iraqi, I would make no differences between Americans and Estonians: they both came to kill my people.

    As a loyal and patriotic American, she’s a Trumper now, a Trumper in full, trying to destroy our country.  That she’s doing it for probably a paltry sum makes it all the more deplorable.  She can DIAF with the rest of them.  She should never be able to eat out in public again, without wondering what’s in her meal, without getting heckled, ,etc.  She should *long* to move to Russia, for the peace and quiet.  She’s a Trumper in full.

  476. 476.

    Anya

    August 26, 2020 at 12:42 am

    @Chetan Murthy: I think they sent 40 technicians or such but I get your point.

  477. 477.

    Ian

    August 26, 2020 at 12:45 am

    @Jinchi:

    Did you expect anything less?

  478. 478.

    Chetan Murthy

    August 26, 2020 at 12:47 am

    @Anya: What’s worse is, it’s not 2016, where she could tell herself “oh, he can’t win, this is just for my share of the inheritance”.  Now, it’s for all the goddamn marbles, with hundreds of thousands of lives *immediately* on the line (b/c the fucker won’t do the minimum to get this pandemic under control) and so many more in the medium-to-long term, as we decide whether we’re going to be a democracy or a fascist state.  She should know this, what with her oh-so-pricey education at UPenn and Georgetown Law?  I mean, what, do they not teach people about the history of democracy, of fascism, of the rule of law, all those things?  b/c shit, she should know these things, to graduate with a J.D.  FFS.

  479. 479.

    The Lodger

    August 26, 2020 at 1:39 am

    @Suzanne: Think of Ivanka’s face as construction without a general contractor.

  480. 480.

    Amir Khalid

    August 26, 2020 at 3:37 am

    @NotMax:

    No ketchup was involved, the T-bone was medium-rare and well worth it.

    My experience with Grab trying to get a car home was quite another matter, though.

  481. 481.

    Steeplejack

    August 26, 2020 at 4:01 am

    @Amir Khalid:

    Glad it was good. [Checks time.] You deserve an afternoon siesta. Any take-home bits for Bianca?

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