In case you’re new to Medium Cool, BGinCHI is here once a week to offer a thread on culture, mainly film & books, with some TV thrown in.
Arguments welcomed, opinions respected, fools unsuffered. We hope it’s a welcome break from the world of shit falling on our heads daily in the political sphere.
Tonight’s Topic: The Perfect Heist
In this week’s MC, we’re gonna do something illegal.
The Hypothetical:
You have a plan for the perfect heist. You need a crew, but they have to be famous, living or dead, or even fictional. Think movies, TV, books, history.
You Need:
- 1 Mastermind
- 1 Second-in-command (or Gun Moll, your choice)
- 1 Hacker/Gadgeteer
- 1 Muscle
- 1 Safe Cracker
- 1 Getaway Driver
Cast yourself in one of the roles.
If you want descriptions, or other roles, go here: https://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/CaperCrew
Briefly explain your choices.
E.
I’m just going to step in here and interrupt real real quick to say: Thank you for suggesting to me the book There There. Very good suggestion! Thank you!
oatler.
In “The Jokers” from 1966 Oliver Reed plans the perfect heist to steal the Crown Jewels with his brother and things go south in a hurry.
BGinCHI
@E.: You’re welcome!
You liked it?
I think about it all the time. Tremendous novel.
PaulB
I would just start with the team from Leverage.
BGinCHI
I love ensembles, which is one of the reason heist films appeal to me. I like the idea of assembling a team, doing an impossible job, maybe even living through it.
Now that I think about it, it’s probably due to reading those Alistair MacLean novels as a kid: Guns of Navarone, etc. When we played army I’d always be the one to set up the scenario, give out the roles, make people stick to them (“No Dave, you’re Mallory, and you’re the weapons expert”).
I’m OG Antifa, I guess.
billcinsd
I would say, if I had to pick a heist role, it would be Mastermind — I am reasonably smart and can’t/won’t do the others, except getaway driver. Truthfully, while I like some heist style entertainment — Leverage, the Dortmunder books — I am not a big fan of most of heist-based entertainment.
eta: Other roles, probably the Leverage crew with me as getaway driver
apsalar
From kid’s movies and TV shows:
Mastermind: Sofia the First (she’s a smart problem solver, good at delegation)
2nd in command: me
Hacker: Ryder from Paw Patrol (he’s got a gadget for everything)
Muscle: Elsa from Frozen (one ice monster coming up!)
Safe Cracker: Cat Noir from Miraculous Ladybug (he’s pretty slick)
Getaway Driver: Vanelope Von Schweetz from Wreck It Ralph (she’s fast)
Mary G
1 Mastermind – Baud!
1 Second-in-command (
or Gun Moll, your choice) – WaterGirl1 Hacker/Gadgeteer – NotMax
1 Muscle – John Cole
1 Safe Cracker – Martin
1 Getaway Driver – Me!
David ? ☘The Establishment☘? Koch
Our Man in Tehran: Canada and James Earl Carter break 6 Yanks out of Iran (riveting documentary Link)
scav
Ahhh, the getaway diver is The Doctor. The dramatic flair would be him basically attempting to take over all of the roles. Capaldi has form — plus my favorite basic attitude — but it’s hard to turn down Tennant’s attempt at being the gun moll. Maybe I should just cast as a multiple doctor episode and stand back. Missy v Tennant
BGinCHI
@apsalar: Perfect.
I love your getaway driver! That’s a great movie….
BGinCHI
@Mary G: Hmm. Let’s go over the “muscle” role again……
MomSense
I asked my kids and got a really good response from middle kid.
1 Sherlock Holmes
2 Gordon Ramsey
3 Satoshi (bitcoin creator, pseudonym) (whoever he is, he works remotely)
4 Bruce Lee
5 Koko the Gorilla
6 [son and fiancée]as getaway drivers, in the bug
She has an old lime green VW beetle and he says cops would never pull it over.
ETA I should note that we paid astronomical auto insurance premiums because of my son’s lead foot.
Ken
I’ll take the one that doesn’t get shot.
Actually, I’d want to play the safe cracker. I’ve always liked O. Henry’s “A Retrieved Reformation”.
NotMax
1 Mastermind – toss-up between Athena or Sherlock Homes (classic Conan Doyle version)
1 Second-in-command (or Gun Moll, your choice) – Myself (only as am obligated to be included somewhere)
1 Hacker/Gadgeteer – MacGyver
1 Muscle – Thomas Topham
1 Safe Cracker – Harry Houdini (who is less well-known for being a master locksmith)
1 Getaway Driver – Rémy Julienne
Roger Moore
@Mary G:
I take it you’re scripting a screwball comedy heist rather than an action/adventure heist.
Feathers
When I hear the term Mastermind now, I remember line from a comedy sketch show during the Tonya Harding/Nancy Kerrigan shitshow. Kids in the Hall, maybe?
Shawn Eckhardt (getaway driver), being questioned by reporters: I was only the mastermind, it was Jeff who thought the whole thing up.
BGinCHI
@MomSense: Love it.
Holmes as bank robber has to have been done by someone.
I was going to write a mystery with a main character named Shylock Holmes, but someone already used it.
debbie
Mastermind: Riley (Sigourney Weaver)
Second-in-command: Fleur (Louise Erdrich’s All Woman)
Hacker/Gadgeteer: Annie Hall (Diane Keaton; she only seems flighty)
Muscle: Okoye (Danai Gurira)
Safe Cracker: Yu Shu Lien (Michelle Yeoh. She’s inside that safe before you even knew it was there.)
Getaway Driver: Louise (despite her political predilection)
BGinCHI
@Feathers: Ha!
One thing I love about the genre is the mastermind who’s, well, not a master mind, the getaway driver who can’t start the car, etc.
Roger Moore
Hmm.
Mastermind: Albert Einstein
Second in Command: Me
Hacker/Gadgeteer: McGuiver
Safecracker: Richard Feynman
Muscle: Bruce Lee
Getaway Driver: Juan Manuel Fangio
zhena gogolia
@oatler.:
I love that movie. It’s on YouTube. James Donald is brilliant in it. It’s just candy from beginning to end.
zhena gogolia
@BGinCHI:
Guns of Navarone is so great. “Shocking taste in undies.” So many wonderful moments.
gwangung
Y’all is my crew; Leverage was mentioned within the first half dozen posts. Looking forward to the continuation. (And if I could only have one from that crew, it’d have to be Parker)(With Parker as muscle….).
zhena gogolia
@debbie:
I was with you until Louise. That sounds pretty damn dangerous.
BGinCHI
@debbie: Fleur!
Teaching that story week after next in my methods course. It’s so, so amazing (as is Tracks, the longer iteration).
I’d make Fleur my muscle.
debbie
@zhena gogolia:
She did get away, no?
Delk
Mastermind: Steve Howe
Number 2: Robert Fripp
Hacker: Tom Schotz
Safe cracker: Les Paul
Muscle: Phil Collen (NOT Phil Collins)
Get away Driver: Dick Dale
Groupie: Me
debbie
@BGinCHI:
Fleur could definitely fill in as Muscle, but having just seen Black Panther, Okoye seems more menacing.
NotMax
Gotta make mention of a few movies as it’s a mediacentric topic.
Outstanding heist film noir: Rififi
Lighthearted heist films: Topkapi (partial remake of the above, same director), also How to Steal a Million
Dullest heist film: The Day They Robbed the Bank of England
@Mary G
What with the facial hair and all you can’t tell am blushing.
;)
Ken
He’s a burglar and safecracker in Conan Doyle’s “The Adventure of Charles Augustus Milverton”.
Omnes Omnibus
I’d go for a slimmed down version.
Peter O’Toole
Audrey Hepburn
A toy boomarang
An E-type Jag
I would play the O’Toole role.
ETA: Le Samourai was on TCM the other night and I only caught the last 45 minutes. Woe is me. Woe!
Ken
@NotMax: Who’s Minding the Mint is another heist that’s lighthearted, even farcical.
billcinsd
@Ken:
The Hot Rock, is a third
hueyplong
Second-in-command/Gun Moll – Ava Gardner in The Killers (sorry, it’s an obsession)
Hacker/Gadgeteer – Elliott Alderson (R Malek) from Mr Robot
Muscle – Sterling Hayden in either Asphalt Jungle or The Killing
Safe Cracker – Ray Winstone from Sexy Beast
Getaway Driver – Jason Statham from the Transporter movies
Mastermind – Verbal Kint, a/k/a the man with the plan, a/k/a Keyser Soze, which means I can have picked poorly anywhere above and come out ok.
persistentillusion
@MomSense: When I was but a mere child (many years ago), I worked in a Porsche Audi shop. One of the guys made more than beer money by racing. He’d dropped a 911 engine into a VW Bug that looked, well, past its prime.
HumboldtBlue
@Mary G:
Oh no!
You’re all gonna die in a fiery crash!
VeniceRiley
NotMax
@BGinCHI
Come to think of it, a decent story could be plotted around Thomas Edison and the gang at Menlo Park undertaking a spectacular heist.
BGinCHI
@Delk: Phil Collins as muscle would have gotten you a stern warning.
BGinCHI
@debbie: I’d watch that buddy movie.
BGinCHI
@NotMax: Rififi is one of my faves. Along with Le Cercle Rouge and Criss Cross. Oh, and Asphalt Jungle.
Ceci n est pas mon nym
@BGinCHI: Perfect lead-in to mine.
Mastermind: Dortmunder (star of a serious of novels by Donald Westlake; he’s not exactly incompetent but things always go crazily wrong)
Second in command: Me
Muscle: Okoye (stolen from debbie @ #19)
Hacker/Gadgeteer: Shuri (because Okoye)
Safe Cracker: Barney Collier (the gadget guy from the old Mission: Impossible TV show. A natural for gadget guy but Shuri edged him out)
Driver: Stan Murch (Dortmunder’s driver)
Omnes Omnibus
@BGinCHI: He is a drummer.
BGinCHI
@Ken: I’ve never read it.
Will remedy.
HumboldtBlue
Mastermind — Bugs Bunny
Gun moll — Bugs dressed in drag
Hacker/engineer — Marvin the Martian
Muscle — Yosemite Sam
Safecracker — Tasmanian Devil
Getaway driver — Daffy Duck
Another Scott
It’s a Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad World was kindofa heist movie, wasn’t it? I guess more than kinda. Maybe it was intended to be a homage to heist movies.
The Wikipedia entry is interesting – https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/It%27s_a_Mad,_Mad,_Mad,_Mad_World
Cheers,
Scott.
hueyplong
@HumboldtBlue: Kind of feel like Daffy is how the thing falls apart.
BGinCHI
@Omnes Omnibus: I’ve long considered you an O’Toole.
But seriously, folks…..
Le Samourai has one of the absolute greatest openings in film. You can’t tell whether it’s a still for the longest time. Mesmerizing. Worth owning.
It’s available on the Criterion Channel to stream.
Delk
@BGinCHI: I’ve been watching Gabriel era Genesis videos on YouTube.
Drove past your school this morning. Stopped at Charcoal Delight.
Major Major Major Major
Genuinely surprised John Rogers didn’t find his way to this post.
NotMax
@BGinCHI
Don’t know why but made me recall Dave Bautista as the muscle juggernaut who deep down is really just a pussycat in Hotel Artemis.
:)
BGinCHI
@billcinsd: Westlake + George Segal. What’s not to like?
narya
Mastermind: Nicholas de Fleury (from the Dunnett novels)
2nd in command: Amy Shaftoe (from Cryptonomicon)
Hacker/gadgeteer: Alan Turing (the Cryptonomicon version)
Muscle: River Shoulders (Dresden novels)
Safecracker: I will second the Houdini suggestion
Getaway driver: Lewis Hamilton, or, if he’s not available, Murch or his mom (Dortmunder novels)
I would be terrible in any role, actually.
HumboldtBlue
@hueyplong:
I’m not too confident about Taz either
narya
@Ceci n est pas mon nym: I see that we share a love of Dortmunder. I love everything Westlake ever wrote.
BGinCHI
@hueyplong: I love Hayden in Asphalt Jungle. I can’t get enough of that film.
Ray Winstone an inspired choice.
I think I’d put Brendan Gleason in mine, though not sure which role.
Brachiator
For my heist…
Hal, Val and a Gal
Mastermind: HAL from 2001: A Space Odyssey
Second in command: Val Kilmer from Batman
Hacker: Val Kilmer from Real Genius
Muscle: Val Kilmer from Tombstone
Safe Cracker: Val Kilmer from The Saint
Getaway driver: Gal Gadot from Fast and Furious/Wonder Woman (invisible jet plane)
gwangung
Could also do two rival teams…who’d you put up against your team of favorites?
Ceci n est pas mon nym
@narya: As far as I know, there is only one Dortmunder film. And it stars Robert Redford in the title role.
As you can imagine, he’s a little different from Westlake’s Dortmunder. I don’t recall much about it, except I think the heist was ultimately successful.
Ooh I just thought of another beloved character: Mrs. Pollifax, a little old lady who is tired of the old-lady life and becomes a spy for the CIA. (Talking about miscasting reminded me of her; she was played in a film by a very glamorous Rosalind Russell. And then in another film by Angela Lansbury, which might have worked except they made her dotty instead of canny and worldly-wise.)
I think my team needs to be larger.
Roger Moore
@HumboldtBlue:
I’m confident Taz can get into the safe; I’m not confident whatever valuables are inside will survive the experience.
prostratedragon
Love heist/conjob movies, including the ones already mentioned (except The Joker; must check that one out) but note that most of them don’t turn out too well for the heisters, especially if Elisha Cook is involved. Being a moll like the Barbara Bain character in the Mission Impossible shows would be fun though, and they lived to tell the tale (or not) after each one. Ditto the Greg Morris gadgeteer role. Inspired improvisation can be a key to success, at least in movie heists. Hence, one of the characters in The Train, which relied on creative inputs from many people to carry off. I could easily be like Jeanne Moreau’s character, for instance.
Peale
I think they might be able to put on a rather interesting show. Obviously, they’re stealing gold records.
BGinCHI
@Ceci n est pas mon nym: God I love the Dortmunder books.
Whenever the world is getting me down (hint: a lot) I read Westlake, or I just think about all his books and it buoys me.
Major Major Major Major
As an avid consumer of sci-fi and fantasy I feel like using favorite fictional characters would be cheating.
hueyplong
@BGinCHI: Absolutely love The Asphalt Jungle.
Almost Sam Jaffe’d the mastermind for sentimental reasons.
Love it when Whitmore threatens to beat the truck driver for saying he runs over cats. He’s not much of a fan of rats, either.
narya
@Ceci n est pas mon nym: I think you’re right about the novels. A few of Westlake’s other works made it to screen (The Grifters was his, I think), and his many other novels, including the Parker novels, are great. He had to come up with pseudonyms because he was so prolific his agent/publisher didn’t think people would believe he’d written everything. I rarely am an autograph person, but I do have a book signed by him.
BGinCHI
@HumboldtBlue: Inspired.
No Roger Rabbit?
NotMax
@BGinCHI
“You boned me in front of a stranger, made me look small.”
BGinCHI
@Delk: I think I’ve only eaten there once. Worth the drive up to Super Dawg.
narya
@BGinCHI: One of the fascinating things about both the Dortmunder and Parker novels is that they rely on theft of objects or cash; the last Parker novel has that as a plot point, i.e., that so many transactions are electronic that there isn’t cash to steal.
HumboldtBlue
@Roger Moore:
Good point
Now let’s do Rodgers and Hammerstein
BGinCHI
@Delk: Also, if you’ve never tried this place on Crawford, you should.
WaterGirl
@Mary G: I am honored to be on your team and be in such esteemed company!
Not entirely certain that the heist will be successful, but we would definitely have some fun trying.
BGinCHI
@NotMax: Love him in the first Guardians movie. And 2nd.
Ken
@Ceci n est pas mon nym: Bank Shot, The Hot Rock, What’s the Worst That Could Happen, Jimmy the Kid, and Why Me have all been adapted, but the character wasn’t always named Dortmunder.
BGinCHI
@narya: GREAT choices.
NotMax
Upon further cogitation, would amend my above at #15 to:
1 Hacker/Gadgeteer – Toss-up between MacGyver or (James Bond’s) Q.
BGinCHI
@Brachiator: This may be the winning entry.
I’d watch the shit out of this.
HumboldtBlue
@BGinCHI:
Nah, wanted to keep it in Bugs’ world but that’s a great choice.
@Peale:
That’s great, well done.
Ken
Safecracker: Shadowcat, Muscle: Superman, Gadgeteer: Gizmo – that sort of thing?
oldster
Mastermind: Leonardo DaVinci
Gadgeteer: Leonardo DaVinci
Safecracker: Leonardo DaVinci
Getaway Horse-powered Tank Driver: Leonardo DaVinci
Muscle: Leonardo DaVinci
I mean, there’s a reason that he is *the* Renaissance Man par excellence.
Moll: Leonardo DaCaprio
Ceci n est pas mon nym
@Ken: That’s great news! Some new titles for my queue.
Are they more or less faithful to the tone of the books?
BGinCHI
@Peale: Aging rock n rollers do a heist.
Call my agent.
prostratedragon
“Why don’t you come down and join us?” —Criss Cross
artem1s
Ceci n est pas mon nym
@BGinCHI: You Westlake fans might already know this, but he has an entry in the “Hard Case Crime” series, which are made to look like old pulp detective novels but I think are just an excuse for well-known writers to do very different kinds of stories, not necessarily noir at all.
Westlake’s is called “Somebody Owes Me Money”
Stephen King has a fun one too called “The Colorado Kid.” And I love the Maine accents in the audio book.
Edit: Just checked the Hard Case Crime website. Both those authors have more than one title in the series.
prostratedragon
@HumboldtBlue: Yeah, was thinking that maybe even Elmer Fudd would be more reliable there, if rather, uh, slow.
narya
@BGinCHI: Murch’s mom always cracked me up. I mean, if you’re going for straight speed, then Hamilton, but if you want a full tale of the route, then Murch or his mom is the way to go. Can I provide you with some salt for that beer?
Sloane Ranger
Mastermind- Raymond Reddington from The Blacklist. He’s experienced, looks after his people and has the necessary leadership skills.
2nd in command – Me I’m a good organiser.
Hacker/Gadgeteer- Who else but The Doctor, Peter Davison incarnation. The others would be too pushy. His trusty sonic screwdriver is the only gadget he would need.
Muscle – Caine from the original Kung Fu series. Can take out guards quietly his little finger.
Safe Cracker – John Mannering alias The Baron. The cracksman hero of John Creasey’s Baron novels.
Getaway Driver – Lewis Hamilton. The best F1 driver in the business.
narya
@Ceci n est pas mon nym: Read it (a million years ago). I’ve read nearly everything he’s written; first one was Bank Shot. I would steal library books off of my dad’s pile, and that one made him laugh out loud, and then made ME laugh out loud; I was in high school at the time. I think at one point I tracked down the vast majority of his stuff, even stuff under other names.
Ken
@Ceci n est pas mon nym: I’ve only seen Hot Rock, Bank Shot, and Jimmy the Kid but those were pretty close to the books.
According to IMDB Why Me? was adapted by Westlake, which is probably a good sign. It also shows two adaptations of Jimmy the Kid, I saw the 1982 version with Paul Le Mat as Dortmunder.
HumboldtBlue
Musicals
Captain: The King Yul Brynner
Second in command: Capt. Von Trapp
Safecracker: Billy Bigelow
Muscle: The Lollipop Guild
Getaway driver: Tracy Turnblad
Gadgeteer: Glinda
Getaway driver: Bert (Mary Poppins)
prostratedragon
Unconventional and improvisational mastermind: Katie Johnson as Mrs. Wilberforce in the first The Ladykillers. Once she said, “It’s the subsidence” I was on to her.
Edited to add a theme song for her: “I’m Gonna Go Fishing,” Miss Peggy Lee
oldster
Best remake of a heist movie:
Thomas Crown affair starring Pierce Brosnian and Rene Russo.
It puts the old Steve Mcqueen version to shame. Worse, you see what a nihilistic sociopath Mcqueen’s character is. Even Faye Dunaway’s cheekbones cannot redeem that film.
BGinCHI
@hueyplong: That’s an amazing scene.
NotMax
Trek mash-up version:
1 Mastermind – Elim Garak
1 Second-in-command (or Gun Moll, your choice) – Spock
1 Hacker/Gadgeteer – Montgomery Scott
1 Muscle – Seven of Nine
1 Safe Cracker – Quark (no prob hearing the tumblers click)
1 Getaway Driver – Hikaru Sulu
:)
HumboldtBlue
@prostratedragon:
I was thinking Tweety for getaway driver but there’s no way those short legs reach the pedals from the driver’s seat.
@NotMax:
That got a chuckle
BGinCHI
@oldster: Moll: Michelangelo
Sloane Ranger
Want to suggest an alternative Mastermind to my original, Professor Moriarty from the Michael Kurland novels. Still a master criminal but a much more sympathetic one to Conan Doyle’s original.
BGinCHI
@Ceci n est pas mon nym: We did a cover from the Charles Williams one last week (or the week before)… Great novel and great series.
Just got the David Goodis one.
Dorothy A. Winsor
I’m in a Zoomed writer group meeting but I’m sneaking peeks here. You guys are great.
Ken
I forget the novel, but my favorite Murch scene is where a new member of the gang is riding with Murch down an interstate, and makes some remark like “anyone could be a driver”. So Murch does something complicated with the steering wheel and gearshift which results in the pickup truck doing a perfect 360 degree doughnut while still moving down the highway at 70 mph, ending up back in his lane moving normally.
PaulWartenberg
I wanna be the librarian who researches the floor plans to the casino and figure out the blind spots in the security camera system.
prostratedragon
@oldster: I think the point of the older version was to see that about both of them. Beautiful surfaces, various kinds of rot underneath. I prefer it to the new one, on which I completely bailed when they implied that the young woman with Crown was his daughter and the Vicki character accepted it.
prostratedragon
@HumboldtBlue: Heh-heh, had the exact same thought about Tweety.
oldster
@BGinCHI:
Agreed!
And I should have made my muscle be: the Vitruvian Man.
Austin Bailey
Mastermind – Emmett Lathrop “Doc” Brown, Ph. D Doc Brown is the ideal Mastermind for a crime that will take place in the future, with the loot being returned to the present. The perfect crime because in 2020 it won’t have happened yet.
2nd in Command – Thomas Crown Not the wimpy Thomas Crown from the remake. The original Steve McQueen, Thomas Crown. The guy who keeps Doc Brown grounded.
Hacker/Gadgeteer – Angus “Mac” MacGyver MacGyver can make a bomb out of a paperclip and a pencil.
Muscle – Fezzik He is the brute squad
Safe Cracker – Stella Bridger – come on, Charlize Theron and she can speak Afrikaans, just in case.
Driver – Me OK, the team wanted Lewis Hamilton, but he wasn’t available.
Craig
Mastermind: Dalton Russell
Gun Moll: Molly from Gibson’s stories
Hacker: The Dixie Flatline
Muscle: Robert Shaw
Safe Cracker: Parker from Leverage
Driver: Junior Johnson
bluefoot
@NotMax: You beat me to a Trek version. I completely agree for hacker and getaway driver. Spock made a good gun moll in “A Piece of the Action” :) I was thinking about Data as the safe cracker.
GrannyMC
Mastermind: Dr Lisa Su, CEO of AMD (Ph.D. in Electrical Engineering from M.I.T., dissertation titled Extreme-submicrometer silicon-on-insulator (SOI) MOSFETs, but also a business genius who turned AMD’s sinking ship around)
Gun Moll AND Second in Command: Nakana Takeko (18th C. female samurai during Boshin War, led a group of female fighters into battle)
Gadget Gal: Hedy Lamarr (actress, but here for co-inventing the first encrypted wireless transmission system)
Muscle: Sarah Robles, top American female weightlifter
Safe Cracker: Genevieve Grotjan, American WWII codebreaker who cracked the Japanese diplomatic code
Getaway Driver: Milka Duno, sports car racing champion
Lookout: Me
BGinCHI
@Austin Bailey: AWESOME.
Fezzik. I love it.
Anybody want a peanut?
BGinCHI
@Craig: Robert Shaw could do any of the parts.
My all-time favorite actor.
BGinCHI
@GrannyMC: MORE female heist movies, please.
I always wanted to see a two part film, where in the first one the men steal the money or diamonds or whatever, then in the sequel, the women put it back.
WaterGirl
@BGinCHI: I would watch that!
NotMax
@bluefoot
Garak would not only make a conniving mastermind, he’d churn out cool bespoke outfits for everyone.
Of course with Quark as safecracker, that one would by cautious necessity have no pockets.
:)
Downpuppy
@Ceci n est pas mon nym:
@narya: The Grifters was Jim Thompson. The weird thing about Dortmunder is the range of actors who’ve played him: (Wiki)
Clearly, Jodie Whittaker is next
bluefoot
If the heist were going down on Sesame Street:
Mastermind: Kermit
Second-in-command/Gun Moll: I guess this would be me.
Hacker: Ernie
Muscle: Miss Piggy
Safe Cracker: The Count, as long as he wasn’t saying the numbers out loud.
Driver: Animal
Lookouts/distraction: The yip-yip aliens
BGinCHI
@bluefoot: Big Bird the friend everyone has to swear not to tell.
narya
@Downpuppy: Westlake wrote the screenplay for Grifters.
Miss Bianca
@PaulB: Yeah, my thoughts flew right to that crew, too!
scav
Austen staffed
Sandia Blanca
Okay, I have only one entrant, and that is for Getaway Driver: Dr. Emilio Lizardo (John Lithgow) from The Adventures of Buckaroo Banzai Across the 8th Dimension.
JaySinWA
@Major Major Major Major:
You think he gives his stuff out for free? Hell he’s probably cribbing notes from this now.
BGinCHI
@Sandia Blanca: Brilliant!
“Laugh-a while you can, monkey boy…”
BGinCHI
@scav: At least with Dickens you’d have a viable crew……
scav
@BGinCHI: Alas, as with my earlier, admittedly loose, effort, I do rather go for possibilities of plot rather than eventual success of heist. I am rather enjoying working up incidents of Emma attempting to manipulate others into performing all the acts of actual violence. Mary Crawford is my other actual character stretch, but she’s certainly mercenary and sneaky.
Miss Bianca
@artem1s: This is fucking scary. I started thinking about it this morning and you’ve nailed almost all my choices in their appropriate spots! You’re not me, are you?//
gogiggs
As driver I want Frank Martin from the Transporter movies, as played by Jason Statham.
As safecracker I want Terry Leather from The Bank Job, as played by Jason Statham.
As muscle Deckard Shaw from the Fast and Furious movies, as played by Jason Statham.
I just want a whole team of Jason Stathams is my point.