• Menu
  • Skip to primary navigation
  • Skip to main content
  • Skip to primary sidebar

Before Header

  • About Us
  • Lexicon
  • Contact Us
  • Our Store
  • ↑
  • ↓
  • ←
  • →

Balloon Juice

Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

Oh FFS you might as well trust a 6-year-old with a flamethrower.

“I was told there would be no fact checking.”

We are aware of all internet traditions.

It’s a good piece. click on over. but then come back!!

Republicans are radicals, not conservatives.

Accountability, motherfuckers.

Seems like a complicated subject, have you tried yelling at it?

There are a lot more evil idiots than evil geniuses.

Relentless negativity is not a sign that you are more realistic.

The republican ‘Pastor’ of the House is an odious authoritarian little creep.

When do we start airlifting the women and children out of Texas?

If rights aren’t universal, they are privilege, not rights.

Red lights blinking on democracy’s dashboard

Everything is totally normal and fine!!!

… pundit janitors mopping up after the gop

The real work of an opposition party is to oppose.

Every decision we make has lots of baggage with it, known or unknown.

Weird. Rome has an American Pope and America has a Russian President.

The low info voters probably won’t even notice or remember by their next lap around the goldfish bowl.

“Perhaps I should have considered other options.” (head-desk)

Sadly, there is no cure for stupid.

Washington Post Catch and Kill, not noticeably better than the Enquirer’s.

This isn’t Democrats spending madly. This is government catching up.

Republicans do not pay their debts.

Mobile Menu

  • Seattle Meet-up Post
  • 2025 Activism
  • Targeted Political Fundraising
  • Donate with Venmo, Zelle & PayPal
  • Site Feedback
  • War in Ukraine
  • Submit Photos to On the Road
  • Politics
  • On The Road
  • Open Threads
  • Topics
  • COVID-19
  • Authors
  • About Us
  • Contact Us
  • Lexicon
  • Our Store
  • Politics
  • Open Threads
  • 2025 Activism
  • Garden Chats
  • On The Road
  • Targeted Fundraising!
You are here: Home / Elections / Election 2020 / I Am Nervous As Fuck

I Am Nervous As Fuck

by John Cole|  November 2, 20204:46 pm| 81 Comments

This post is in: Election 2020

FacebookTweetEmail

I really just want this to be over and am really trying to summon my inner Steve and just chill the fuck out:

I Am Nervous As Fuck

I mean who sits like that, Steve?

FacebookTweetEmail
Previous Post: « Election Day Eve Afternoon Open Thread
Next Post: Open Thread: Minor Campaign Diversions »

Reader Interactions

81Comments

  1. 1.

    raven

    November 2, 2020 at 4:48 pm

    Nervous as a cat crappin ground glass.

  2. 2.

    Jim, Foolish Literalist

    November 2, 2020 at 4:49 pm

    I’m thinking I should go over to my sister’s house to pet dogs

  3. 3.

    CaseyL

    November 2, 2020 at 4:50 pm

    I mean who sits like that, Steve?

    The most interesting cat in the world, that’s who.

  4. 4.

    JCJ

    November 2, 2020 at 4:50 pm

    @raven: As nervous as a long-tailed cat in a room full of rocking chairs

  5. 5.

    Sebastian

    November 2, 2020 at 4:50 pm

    I hear ya and I was the same until yesterday but I started reading Wassermann (of Cook) and leantossup.ca.

    Now I cannot wait, am in great mood, savoring the last hours before the triumph.

  6. 6.

    trollhattan

    November 2, 2020 at 4:51 pm

    @Sebastian:

    I’m trending that direction myself.

    Can’t wait. LFG!

  7. 7.

    judyinsd

    November 2, 2020 at 4:53 pm

    Have a listen to Leslie Odom Jr. and Wait for It.

    https://twitter.com/leslieodomjr/status/1323359068870877191

  8. 8.

    raven

    November 2, 2020 at 4:53 pm

    @JCJ: There it is.

  9. 9.

    Mary G

    November 2, 2020 at 4:54 pm

    I am irrationally exuberant today. Possibly my brain is fried because I only slept two and a half hours, but feeling certain of winning feels good.

  10. 10.

    Benw

    November 2, 2020 at 4:54 pm

    Steve looks comfy. My 14 yo orange tabby has taken to napping on the sliver of space in front of my oven range that doesn’t have the burners. I have to shoo her off to cook anything

    I’m going to run and listen to loud angry music now to decompress from an all day spreadsheet-fest.

  11. 11.

    NotMax

    November 2, 2020 at 4:54 pm

    4 out of 5 doctors agree that operating as if Twitter doesn’t exist will reduce nervousness by 66%.

  12. 12.

    raven

    November 2, 2020 at 4:55 pm

    I just finished making a big ass pot of gumbo. I think we may make a Costco run in the am.

  13. 13.

    The Moar You Know

    November 2, 2020 at 4:56 pm

    I am not nervous about the election or the results.

    I am nervous as fuck about both the short and long term aftermath.  America is not going to be what it used to be.   And we have a lot of very serious damage to fix.

  14. 14.

    Nicole

    November 2, 2020 at 4:56 pm

    @raven: Ooh!   Costco run!  That’s a good idea.  I may do that tomorrow, too.

  15. 15.

    NotMax

    November 2, 2020 at 4:57 pm

    @raven

    Buy something decadent.

  16. 16.

    raven

    November 2, 2020 at 4:58 pm

    @Nicole: It’s a two hour drive for us so we can leave at 8 and get there right in time for old people hours!

  17. 17.

    The Other Bob

    November 2, 2020 at 4:58 pm

    I am ready to buy several bottles of this stuff for the White House staff…

    https://www.amazon.com/Resolve-Destroyer-Bottle-Citrus-RAC99487/dp/B07PPB1KTP

  18. 18.

    raven

    November 2, 2020 at 4:58 pm

    @NotMax: $4.99 bird!

  19. 19.

    Steve in the ATL

    November 2, 2020 at 4:59 pm

    @raven:

     

    we may make a Costco run in the am

    Augusta?

  20. 20.

    Lord Fartdaddy (Formerly, Mumphrey, Smedley Darlington Mingobat, et al.)

    November 2, 2020 at 4:59 pm

    We’re going to make it.  Trump is a catastrophically bad candidate and a catastrophically incompetent president, and he’s sat on his ass while he let the country burn, and people know that.  And Joe Biden is a decent guy and a good campaigner running against him.

    This is going to turn out all right.

  21. 21.

    gene108

    November 2, 2020 at 4:59 pm

    I am beyond nervous. I am numb.

  22. 22.

    cliosfanboy

    November 2, 2020 at 5:00 pm

    Working as an election officer in a heavily blue precinct tomorrow.  Dreading the very long day and possible disruption.

  23. 23.

    gvg

    November 2, 2020 at 5:00 pm

    Google search cats sitting funny or cats if I fits I sits. relaxing funny cat pics and videos help. I’ve been checking out good old lol cats/I can haz cheeseburger especially before bed every night. It helps me.

  24. 24.

    jeffreyw

    November 2, 2020 at 5:01 pm

    @raven: Kroger had whole briskets on sale today. I trimmed one and have it brining in tender quick.  It’ll be pepper pastrami in a few weeks.

  25. 25.

    p.a.

    November 2, 2020 at 5:01 pm

    I have PT’16Disorder like everyone else.  Going off grid tomorrow, may just check in here a few times.

  26. 26.

    satby

    November 2, 2020 at 5:01 pm

    @The Moar You Know: I’m tense about both the election and the aftermath. I won’t feel ok until Biden and Harris are sworn in… though if we have a sweep of both houses of Congress I’ll feel a distinct improvement in my mood after they get sworn in on Jan. 3rd.

  27. 27.

    Delk

    November 2, 2020 at 5:03 pm

    The only thing I’m worried about is how many more times can we impeach the mother fucker between Wednesday and when Joe gets sworn in.

  28. 28.

    satby

    November 2, 2020 at 5:03 pm

    @NotMax: Reminds me I’m out of Bailey’s, though that’s not really decadent. Tomorrow will be a Bailey’s in my coffee day. Every cup.

  29. 29.

    Lyrebird

    November 2, 2020 at 5:04 pm

    @The Other Bob: Love it!

     

    And thanks JC for the Steve portrait.

  30. 30.

    satby

    November 2, 2020 at 5:05 pm

    @cliosfanboy: Good luck, and thanks for your service!

  31. 31.

    Sebastian

    November 2, 2020 at 5:06 pm

    @Delk:

    Might not be a bad idea to prevent pardons and fuck with GOP senators up in 2022.

  32. 32.

    debbie

    November 2, 2020 at 5:06 pm

    @Delk:

    Meanwhile, the GOPers want to preemptively impeach Biden.  ??‍♀️

  33. 33.

    Sebastian

    November 2, 2020 at 5:08 pm

    @debbie:

    They are delusional and still think the old rules apply. They will all die in prison.

  34. 34.

    raven

    November 2, 2020 at 5:09 pm

    @Steve in the ATL: Nah, Gwinnett.

  35. 35.

    prostratedragon

    November 2, 2020 at 5:09 pm

    A little Joy Unlimited, Harry Beckett to lighten the mood.

  36. 36.

    Nicole

    November 2, 2020 at 5:10 pm

    @raven: I have to walk a mile-and-a-half.  But it won’t take 2 hours to get there, so there’s that.

  37. 37.

    debbie

    November 2, 2020 at 5:10 pm

    @Sebastian:

    Works for me.

  38. 38.

    raven

    November 2, 2020 at 5:12 pm

    @jeffreyw: No red meat for 26 years over here!

  39. 39.

    Steve in the ATL

    November 2, 2020 at 5:13 pm

    @raven:

    Gwinnett?  Ewww (no offense, SD).  But it’s still a better Costco than Augusta’s.  And you’ve got Dave & Buster’s and the PGA Superstore right next door!

  40. 40.

    raven

    November 2, 2020 at 5:14 pm

    @Nicole: There are two about 12 miles apart in Gwinnett but they won’t put one in Athens !

  41. 41.

    Platonicspoof

    November 2, 2020 at 5:14 pm

    Maybe go look for a book to read for now.

  42. 42.

    Nicole

    November 2, 2020 at 5:17 pm

    There was a bierhouse near us that made the best, best, best mulled wine in winter.  It closed a year ago (I cried), and I figured I’d say goodbye to mulled wine as I am not the sort to sit patiently by a saucepan, making sure something doesn’t boil (my son, when he was 3, referred to me as “a fire cook,” because, to quote him, “Every time Mommy cooks the fire alarm goes off.”  Harsh but fair, kid).  However… I discovered it is possible to make mulled wine in a slow cooker, and now I know my project for tomorrow.  Or Wednesday, depending on my mood.  Or heck, both.

  43. 43.

    raven

    November 2, 2020 at 5:17 pm

    @Steve in the ATL: We go to the Mall of Ga one, they are 12 miles apart but we go up 29 to 85 and miss that 316 nightmare.

  44. 44.

    Yutsano

    November 2, 2020 at 5:18 pm

    Ya want some good news? I’lls give ya some good news from the GOS! I told y’all don’t be counting out
    Steve Bullock in Montana just yet. That’s an insane vote total and it might be good for the governor and House race as well.

  45. 45.

    NotMax

    November 2, 2020 at 5:18 pm

    @satby

    At the moment slurping from this mug.

    You might get a grin from this other one. (I possess the wrong plumbing for it to apply.)

    :)

  46. 46.

    jeffreyw

    November 2, 2020 at 5:20 pm

    @raven:  Heh heh heh

  47. 47.

    Nicole

    November 2, 2020 at 5:20 pm

    @raven:

    There are two about 12 miles apart in Gwinnett but they won’t put one in Athens !

    Well, that seems unfair.

  48. 48.

    Steve in the ATL

    November 2, 2020 at 5:21 pm

    @raven:

    Ah, then you can go to REI.  Good call.

  49. 49.

    Le Comte de Monte Cristo, fka Edmund Dantes

    November 2, 2020 at 5:22 pm

    @jeffreyw:

    That price is fantastic. We’re out of freezer space at the moment, though.

    I’m suggesting that I use 18-20 hours of Christmas Eve and smoke one.

  50. 50.

    WaterGirl

    November 2, 2020 at 5:23 pm

    @Steve in the ATL: Happy to see you again. Twice in a week, maybe you really are back.  :-)

  51. 51.

    bjacques

    November 2, 2020 at 5:24 pm

    Biden’s campaign is so fat on cash they should air drop a million bucks in Benjamin’s over each of Trump’s remaining rallies, and offer odds of Trump himself scrambling for the cash.

  52. 52.

    raven

    November 2, 2020 at 5:25 pm

    @jeffreyw: Think of how I felt when I cooked a 300lb hog for 24 hours and didn’t even taste it!

  53. 53.

    NotMax

    November 2, 2020 at 5:25 pm

    @Le Comte de Monte Cristo, fka Edmund Dantes

    and smoke one

    Don’t you find it hard to keep it lit?

    :)

  54. 54.

    WaterGirl

    November 2, 2020 at 5:26 pm

    My old boss got caught on a live mic right before his wedding saying:  “I’m as nervous as a goose shitting peach pits.”

    That’s a good one.

  55. 55.

    Mel

    November 2, 2020 at 5:28 pm

    @raven: Nervous as a long tailed cat in a room full of rocking chairs.

  56. 56.

    NotMax

    November 2, 2020 at 5:28 pm

    @raven

    Sounds as if they’ve got the market area of Gwinnett buttoned up.

    /Founding Fathers humor

  57. 57.

    jeffreyw

    November 2, 2020 at 5:28 pm

    @raven: I heard that pork was the other white meat?

  58. 58.

    raven

    November 2, 2020 at 5:29 pm

    @jeffreyw: I knew it was comin!

  59. 59.

    Kattails

    November 2, 2020 at 5:29 pm

    @satby: Bailey’s isn’t quite high enough proof for me, I’ll be going with straight Irish whiskey in the coffee. Some cream and a dash of sugar. Gotta stand at the polls with signs for 1 1/2 hrs, supposed to be windy. Did some lit drops over the weekend too.  (ps if you ever see Five Farms Irish cream–pricey but seriously a step above everything else.)

  60. 60.

    Ivan X

    November 2, 2020 at 5:29 pm

    Woman Hopes She Did Enough Worrying To Help Biden Campaign:

    ERIE, PA—Waiting on tenterhooks on the eve of the election, local woman Elise Stalter expressed her hope Monday that she had done enough worrying to help the Biden presidential campaign. “I’ve been panicking pretty much every day for the last few months, but now that there’s only one day left, I wonder if I could have done more,” said Stalter, admitting that while she had regularly taken to the streets to collapse in a puddle of despair, she couldn’t shake the feeling that she could have gone even further with her mental breakdown. “I’ve been sending out texts telling everyone I know that I’m constantly on the verge of a full-blown anxiety attack, and I’ve spent hundreds of dollars supporting a variety of self-soothing products. Now I just pray that I’ve experienced enough existential dread to make a difference.” At press time, Stalter consoled herself that she still had almost a full day to slip into a catatonic state.

  61. 61.

    raven

    November 2, 2020 at 5:30 pm

    @Mel:
    4.

    JCJ
    NOVEMBER 2, 2020 AT 4:50 PM

    @raven: As nervous as a long-tailed cat in a room full of rocking chairs

  62. 62.

    Mel

    November 2, 2020 at 5:34 pm

    @raven:  Late to the party. Sigh…

  63. 63.

    Nutmeg again

    November 2, 2020 at 5:35 pm

    Way nervous!  I’m voting in person–the mail in stuff was timely me during all the news about Post Office fuckery. I did not know, then, about the town hall drop boxes. (I’m in CT).  I have my little folding aluminum tripod museum stool thingie. I could hang my handicapped parking hang tag around my neck maybe :/ ? I expect minimal fuss–I live in a little dot of a town, and so far I have never seen so much as a masking issue. Lots of Repub lawn signs–local, not Trump–in my town. Surrounding towns well laced with Biden/Harris. No idea what those tea leaves mean.

    I spent a lot of today hunkered down under a warm quilt listening to good books. It’s cold and windy here, so that worked. Now it’s tonight. Soon, it will be tomorrow. My dog is ready to Bite The Bad People. Grrr.

  64. 64.

    raven

    November 2, 2020 at 5:38 pm

    @Mel: It’s the thought that counts!

  65. 65.

    raven

    November 2, 2020 at 5:40 pm

    @Nutmeg again: I waited and hour and a half and the guy in front of me had one of those little folding chairs that he had to climb out of every two or three minutes!

  66. 66.

    NotMax

    November 2, 2020 at 5:40 pm

    @jeffreyw

    The real thing at the late, lamented Carnegie Deli.

  67. 67.

    Steve in the ATL

    November 2, 2020 at 5:42 pm

    @WaterGirl: I got the response I expected–and wanted–from Omnes, so I may stick around!

  68. 68.

    thalarctosMaritimus

    November 2, 2020 at 5:51 pm

    Is Steve a polydactyl? Four thumbs up!

  69. 69.

    MomSense

    November 2, 2020 at 6:00 pm

    I’m being assigned to Lewiston tomorrow to do voter protection.  I need to dress warmly.

  70. 70.

    Shana

    November 2, 2020 at 6:01 pm

    Some wag online somewhere said it’s as if the whole country is waiting for the results of a biopsy.

    I’m going to try to get to bed early since I have to get up at 5 to set up my polling place. It’s in a county rec center which will be closed to everything but voting tomorrow. The portion of the driveway directly in front of the entrance will be blocked to traffic so we can set up our table outside the 40 foot limit. Helps with social distancing. Instead of sample ballots we have the equivalent on a large sign that is just about perfectly sized to fit into someone’s cell phone picture which is what we’re encouraging people to do.

    I’m not worried about Joe getting more votes than tRump, just about those votes being counted properly.

  71. 71.

    MomSense

    November 2, 2020 at 6:02 pm

    @Steve in the ATL:

    Steve in the fucking ATL you have been missed!

  72. 72.

    Quiltingfool

    November 2, 2020 at 6:04 pm

    @gvg: I go to a website called Love Meow; it has stories of rescued cats and kittens and lots of adorable cat photos.  It is very calming!

  73. 73.

    WaterGirl

    November 2, 2020 at 6:04 pm

    @Steve in the ATL:   I am torn between “you better!” and “please please”.

    Please insert whichever would get the better response. :-)

    (As if my opinion would influence your decision.  Ha!)

  74. 74.

    japa21

    November 2, 2020 at 6:06 pm

    @MomSense: By some…myself included.

  75. 75.

    karensky

    November 2, 2020 at 6:13 pm

    Steve is a gorgeous king and sits however he wants.

  76. 76.

    Quiltingfool

    November 2, 2020 at 6:16 pm

    I’m voting tomorrow (Missouri).  My fantasy is that Biden takes Missouri, but I’m going to say that the reality is the ferret-headed shitgibbon will win Missouri.  Polls have him at 6 points over Biden, but in 2016 he was 16 points over Clinton, so he has lost a step here.    After voting, I will go to my happy place (the Quilt Cave!)  and work on a custom quilt for an Etsy client.  The quilt is purples and deep yellows, lots of Star blocks, I think she’ll like it.

  77. 77.

    mrmoshpotato

    November 2, 2020 at 6:40 pm

    A magnificent motherfucker sits like that! :)

  78. 78.

    Omnes Omnibus

    November 2, 2020 at 6:52 pm

    @Steve in the ATL: Damn it!

  79. 79.

    Richard

    November 2, 2020 at 7:36 pm

    @WaterGirl: that is a good one?

  80. 80.

    TeezySkeezy

    November 2, 2020 at 7:42 pm

    @Mary G:

    I hope you’re right.  I really do.

  81. 81.

    satby

    November 2, 2020 at 7:46 pm

    @NotMax: I love them both. May get the lady one for use at the farmers market, where my potty mouth gets me in hot water with all the delicate snowflake farmers.

Comments are closed.

Primary Sidebar

On The Road - PaulB - Olympic Peninsula: Salt Creek Recreation Area & Kalaloch Beach
Image by PaulB (5/10/25)

Recent Comments

  • Shalimar on Dank Grey Dawn Open Thread : Shut Up, Comey (May 16, 2025 @ 6:38am)
  • Soprano2 on Dank Grey Dawn Open Thread : Shut Up, Comey (May 16, 2025 @ 6:36am)
  • Manyakitty on Lest We Forget: Kilmar Abrego Garcia (May 16, 2025 @ 6:33am)
  • Aussie Sheila on Dank Grey Dawn Open Thread : Shut Up, Comey (May 16, 2025 @ 6:32am)
  • Old Dan and Little Ann on Dank Grey Dawn Open Thread : Shut Up, Comey (May 16, 2025 @ 6:29am)

PA Supreme Court At Risk

Donate

Balloon Juice Posts

View by Topic
View by Author
View by Month & Year
View by Past Author

Featuring

Medium Cool
Artists in Our Midst
Authors in Our Midst
War in Ukraine
Donate to Razom for Ukraine

🎈Keep Balloon Juice Ad Free

Become a Balloon Juice Patreon
Donate with Venmo, Zelle or PayPal

Meetups

Upcoming Ohio Meetup May 17
5/11 Post about the May 17 Ohio Meetup

Calling All Jackals

Site Feedback
Nominate a Rotating Tag
Submit Photos to On the Road
Balloon Juice Anniversary (All Links)
Balloon Juice Anniversary (All Posts)
Fix Nyms with Apostrophes

Hands Off! – Denver, San Diego & Austin

Social Media

Balloon Juice
WaterGirl
TaMara
John Cole
DougJ (aka NYT Pitchbot)
Betty Cracker
Tom Levenson
David Anderson
Major Major Major Major
DougJ NYT Pitchbot
mistermix

Keeping Track

Legal Challenges (Lawfare)
Republicans Fleeing Town Halls (TPM)
21 Letters (to Borrow or Steal)
Search Donations from a Brand

PA Supreme Court At Risk

Donate

Site Footer

Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

  • Facebook
  • RSS
  • Twitter
  • YouTube
  • Comment Policy
  • Our Authors
  • Blogroll
  • Our Artists
  • Privacy Policy

Copyright © 2025 Dev Balloon Juice · All Rights Reserved · Powered by BizBudding Inc

Share this ArticleLike this article? Email it to a friend!

Email sent!