Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

You don’t get rid of your umbrella while it’s still raining.

You passed on an opportunity to be offended? What are you even doing here?

I’ve spoken to my cat about this, but it doesn’t seem to do any good.

The republican speaker is a slippery little devil.

We are aware of all internet traditions.

if you can’t see it, then you are useless in the fight to stop it.

If you still can’t see these things even now, maybe politics isn’t your forte and you should stop writing about it.

SCOTUS: It’s not “bribery” unless it comes from the Bribery region of France. Otherwise, it’s merely “sparkling malfeasance”.

“The defense has a certain level of trust in defendant that the government does not.”

“Can i answer the question? No you can not!”

Fear or fury? The choice is ours.

Hey Washington Post, “Democracy Dies in Darkness” was supposed to be a warning, not a mission statement.

It’s all just conspiracy shit beamed down from the mothership.

I’d like to think you all would remain faithful to me if i ever tried to have some of you killed.

Well, whatever it is, it’s better than being a Republican.

Beware of advice from anyone for whom Democrats are “they” and not “we.”

Giving in to doom is how we fail to fight for ourselves & one another.

rich, arrogant assholes who equate luck with genius

DeSantis transforming Florida into 1930s Germany with gators and theme parks.

Let the trolls come, and then ignore them. that’s the worst thing you can do to a troll.

Polls are now a reliable indicator of what corporate Republicans want us to think.

It’s a good piece. click on over. but then come back!!

Come on, media. you have one job. start doing it.

We can show the world that autocracy can be defeated.

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Reader Interactions

59Comments

  2. 2.

    RedDirtGirl

    I’m still not looking at any news. But not getting a great vibe from the quick peeks I’m taking at BJ. Gonna try to sleep and check in in the morning. Fingers fucking crossed!

  3. 3.

    R-Jud

    Just woke up over here in the U.K. and BOY am I glad to see AZ was just called in Biden’s favour.

    I can’t believe my home state of PA is causing this much drama.

  6. 6.

    Jerzy Russian

    @R-Jud:

     

    AZ was just called in Biden’s favour.

    Good news about AZ. Also too, I see you have adopted British spelling. When in Rome, etc.

  7. 7.

    guachi

    Anyone have a good read on the Senate?

    Democrats are at a net 1 seat so far. I can’t really figure out if IA is a possible flip at this point. And Collins is way outperforming Trump in ME but, who knows?

    NC is looking more to Tillis at this point. Daines is likely to win in MT. One GA race to a runoff. The other… who knows?

  11. 11.

    SWMBO

    @Suzanne: My stomach hurts.  This is getting a 2016 vibe all over again.  I’m reduced to Cheetos and tomato juice. And the worst part is knowing that my republican relatives are going to celebrate like crazy.

  12. 12.

    Suzanne

    God DAMN am I feeling better about Arizona. I canvassed, phone banked, etc etc etc every election cycle since 2006. Sean Bowie, who was my State Senator in LD18, won his seat two cycles ago by the narrowest of margins. He won tonight by over twenty points.

  14. 14.

    LongHairedWeirdo

    I feel for you, my friend. I was watching the 538 results and screamed “I KNOW JAY INSLEE WON!!! WHO THE FUCK CARES? PUT UP SOME BIGGER NUMBERS ON BIDEN!”

    (And there was a little piece of “they *can’t* call California yet, I wanted there to be a massive chunk of uncounted electoral votes sitting in our corner!” )

    And it annoys me because they, unlike the Republican Party, care about the truth, and data, and all that stuff. So it’s really not fair to be screaming at their website (not *technically* at them, but it feels that way).

    Still, remember what the earlier “chill the feck out” post said – last week, we *all* knew there was a chance there’d be an illusory Trump win, and we’d learn tomorrow, or Thursday, that, thank god, sanity prevailed.

    Got any ginger in your house? That can really help a tender tummy (though I think I lose macho points just for using the word “tummy”. Oh well, I guess folks might think I’m weird).

  15. 15.

    Hilfy

    John, since you aren’t eating as you undergo such stress, taking some antacid might help your stomach.  Also hot tea, of any kind, can be soothing.  I turned the TV off, as it is unbearable.  With I could read a book,  but nothing I’ve tried holds my interest.

  17. 17.

    Jeffro

    I just want to say, this fucking bottle of champagne I bought when trumpov went into the hospital with Covid won’t keep forever…let’s get the count right and kick this orange moron out, and soon!

    Jesus.

    This fucking country, I swear.  It’s like we do everything backward here.  We give all the money to the already-rich, elect the dumbest among us, and can’t even get our data right on the most basic of things.  Up by 7-8% nationwide?  Ooops I guess NOT

    Where did all these Neanderthals crawl out from, anyway?   I thought we had a decent Cro-Magnon “republic” going here.

  20. 20.

    Suzanne

    Baby has a rash on her face. No fever, no other symptoms. Could it be a sign of COVID. FUCK FUCK FUCK.

    So one of my friends, who lives in Omaha, tested positive for COVID today. She arranged for a friend to bring her a ballot, sealed it in a bag, and it was returned in time.

    Please make the times less interesting.

  22. 22.

    The Enderville Phantom

    John if it’s any consolation, my father spent most of the night screaming at the TV upstairs as election results came in. I suggested he watch a movie instead. Clue is on. Who killed Mr. Boddy?

  23. 23.

    Arclite

    Waiting for the John Cole post titled “Fuck! Fuck! Fuck!”

     

    This is gonna be a goddamn nailbiter.  It’s 2016 all over again.

  24. 24.

    Aleta

    For months, Republicans in Pennsylvania have been laying the groundwork for sowing confusion in the aftermath of the election. The Republican legislature refused to allow counties to begin opening or counting mail-in ballots—a process called “pre-canvassing”—until 7 A.M. on Election Day, which seemed sure to cause delays and mishaps. Republicans have also mandated that each mail-in ballot be sealed in a second “secrecy” envelope, a provision that will likely slow counts and lead to voter error. (In Philadelphia’s municipal elections last year, mistakes regarding secrecy envelopes were made on six per cent of ballots.)

    These efforts could delay the announcement of results from mail-in ballots, which more Democrats have requested than Republicans by a margin of two to one. This increases the likelihood of a “red mirage,” the announcement of Election Night results that favor Republicans, even if the true total favors Democrats. Such efforts could also be used to invalidate large numbers of Democratic votes, which could help Trump take the state. And, if votes are contested, it increases the chance that the results will be determined by a Supreme Court ruling or by the state legislature, both of which seem likely to favor Trump. Chester County has already been inundated with legal demands for documents.

     

    (York County)   If (county employees) came across “naked ballots,” or ballots that lacked a secrecy envelope, they alerted the political parties. The parties could then contact voters, tell them there was a problem, and urge them to fix it.

    (Dauphin and Lancaster Counties)  Voters who mailed in naked ballots, or made some other error, will never get the chance to fix them, because officials there believe the law does not allow them to do anything but reject ballots that contain mistakes.

    As Pennsylvania’s 67 counties began the painstaking process of processing and counting more than 2.5 million mail ballots, whether or not voters were given a chance to fix errors and ensure their votes were counted depended largely on where they lived.  That inconsistency is now at the heart of an eleventh-hour lawsuit filed Tuesday by a group of Republican candidates and voters seeking for counties to set aside any ballots that voters were allowed to fix.

     

    Republican candidates in Pennsylvania sued Secretary of State Kathy Boockvar in the state’s appellate court Tuesday night, arguing that voters whose mail-in ballots were rejected should not be permitted to cast provisional ballots instead, and Pennsylvania should throw out any votes in the battleground state that were cast that way.

    …
    The lawsuit follows a similar lawsuit filed earlier Tuesday by Republicans in federal court that challenged “cured” ballots in Montgomery County, Pennsylvania.

    Boockvar defended the practice of identifying voters with mail-in ballot defects in a press conference Tuesday night as “completely valid,” asserting that “there’s absolutely nothing in Pennsylvania law that prohibits that practice.” Boockvar also noted that the state’s law around provisional ballots exists for issues like those now being challenged by the Republican lawmakers, in order “to allow every qualified voter to have the opportunity to have their vote counted.”

  29. 29.

    Aleta

    In Maine, plant managers and the postmasters of local post offices were driving their own cars all over the state tonight to make sure ballots were delivered in time.   (Big state too.) Employees worked all day like crazy to get everything out despite all the obstacles meant by the T administration to prevent it.

  32. 32.

    frosty

    @Suzanne: My GI tract is OK. Ab muscles not so much. Liver will be regretting this election in the morning.

    PA mail-ins still to be counted. Per B-J comment below, advantage in registrations is 1 MM D. Hoping it’s true.

    I sent Gov Wolf a message: “Count all the votes. Channel Andy Jackson: ‘John Roberts has made his decision. Now let him enforce it.’ ”

    Hoping for the best in the AM.

  33. 33.

    Kelly

    Well in Orygun we’ve passed Measure 109 legalizing magic mushrooms in a therapeutic setting and Measure 110 decriminalizing small quantities of most drugs. Could be comforting.

  34. 34.

    frosty

    @SWMBO: 2016 vibe was bad. 2018 vibe was good. I left the election party dejected but a day later we had done well. Fingers crossed.

  38. 38.

    Cacti

    I’m feeling very 2016 about all of this.

    I wish I wasn’t, but everything seems to be breaking the Dotard’s way.

  42. 42.

    mdblanche

    @frosty: I’m not getting a 2016 or a 2018 vibe now. It’s a 2020 vibe. All sorts of weirdness in the results due to all the early voting, clearly not getting a call before sunrise, not looking like a catastrophe, not looking like a triumph.

  46. 46.

    Mj_Oregon

    I’ll never believe another f*cking poll in what’s left of my life. I should have never looked before I went to bed.

  48. 48.

    StringOnAStick

    @Kelly: Hey, thanks for the welcome to OR yesterday; we love it here!  I’d love for redistricting to fold us into a blue zone.

    I’ve heard microdosing treats depression but I haven’t started Michael Polland’s latest book yet to dig into the details.

  50. 50.

    FlyingToaster

    @Cacti: A number of polling places closed an hour late, due to problems during the day; there were still people in line 2 hours after the original closing times.

    Chances are we will see ME and NV results tomorrow AM, PA results tomorrow PM, WI and GA Thursday AM, and Michigan on Friday.  These per the announcements from each state elections personnel.

    Plus there are a bunch of missing ballots (300k) in FL, that the Postal Service is ignoring the court order concerning.

    I’m done; have a nice evening, y’all.

  51. 51.

    Kelly

    @StringOnAStick: Result aren’t final but it looks like Bend will turf an R Senator and an R Rep from the Leg. If we get another seat from the census perhaps a new Congressional district that runs from Bend north to Hood River and the Columbia Gorge could be reliably Dem.

  55. 55.

    The Enderville Phantom

    @Geminid: I disagree. Montana is trending deep red. Fucking Greg Gianforte declared the winner in the governor’s race. Montana used to be like it’s neighbouring states the Dakotas where they might send a Dorgan, Heitkamp, or Johnson to Senate. Not anymore.

    If you saw the ratio of signs around Flathead County, 9 to 1, you’d think it would be a blowout for Daines. The amount of spent shells on the side of the highway and the white power advertisements online telling everybody to come join Freedom Country is everything you need to know about the New Montana.

  56. 56.

    SectionH

    @Suzanne: Oh yeah it is So Good to see AZ going Blue. Thank you for all the work you did. I may call our besties tonight to congratulate them. Hang in there in PA – long way to go there.

  57. 57.

    Ruckus

    There is nothing any of us can do about any of this.

    Watch something else, listen to some nice music. Read a fucking book. Knit something. Anything else.

    Why is it that humans seemingly have to throw themselves into the fire and then complain about the heat? Why are any of you thinking that there will be results TONIGHT? Most states allow mail in ballots to be postmarked up to close of polling today. CA is giving 17 days for them to arrive after that. Many states do not count any ballots until polls close today. And they have millions of votes to count. It will take time to get it right.

    Take a deep breath, light up or drink up if that is your pleasure or pain and settle in for a few days of who the hell knows. Sure it may be that results can be in in a day or 4 but if you want to be alive to enjoy seeing shitforbrains get his ass thrown out of the WH then you will have to be here and semi sane to enjoy that.

    The old refrain is along the lines of “Work on the things you can change, and accept the things you can’t.” And we can’t change that it takes time to properly total up the votes of a nation of this size, with 50 different states and systems actually doing the counting.

    I’m watching Netflix and waiting. Will we get everything we all want? NFW. We aren’t that lucky, nor is it possible. One day at a time…….

  59. 59.

    SWMBO

    @Adam L Silverman: You will be relieved to learn that after I read about berry tarts and such on another thread, I have consumed a bowl of pound cake, strawberries, and whipped cream.

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