Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

Narcissists are always shocked to discover other people have agency.

Compromise? There is no middle ground between a firefighter and an arsonist.

It’s pointless to bring up problems that can only be solved with a time machine.

We are aware of all internet traditions.

fuckem (in honor of the late great efgoldman)

There is no compromise when it comes to body autonomy. You either have it or you don’t.

The truth is, these are not very bright guys, and things got out of hand.

Republicans would impeach Biden if he bit into a whole Kit Kat rather than breaking the sections apart.

Not all heroes wear capes.

Everyone is in a bubble, but some bubbles model reality far better than others!

Fight them, without becoming them!

Shallow, uninformed, and lacking identity

DeSantis transforming Florida into 1930s Germany with gators and theme parks.

The Supreme Court is corrupt. Democrats must win in November and force court reform.

Dead end MAGA boomers crying about Talyor Swift being a Dem is my kind of music. Turn it up.

I conferred with the team and they all agree – still not tired of winning!

Usually wrong but never in doubt

Maybe you would prefer that we take Joelle’s side in ALL CAPS?

They fucked up the fucking up of the fuckup!

The republican caucus is covering themselves with something, and it’s not glory.

Days Since JD Vance Insulted Women Across America: Zero

Ah, the different things are different argument.

It’s the corruption, stupid.

It’s always darkest before the other shoe drops.

You are here: Home / Open Threads / The Twelve Days of Treason – by SiubhanDuinne

The Twelve Days of Treason – by SiubhanDuinne

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What better way could there be to celebrate the beginning of the transition to President Biden than a delightful song?

The Twelve Days of Treason – by SiubhanDuinne

We bring you the Twelve Days of Treason, written by SiubhanDuinne, of course!

On the First day of Treason
The Trumpers gave to me:
A drunk Rudy Giuliani.

On the Second day of Treason
The Trumpers gave to me:
Two tiny hands,
And a drunk Rudy Giuliani.

On the Third day of Treason
The Trumpers gave to me:
Three wedding vows,
Two tiny hands,
And a drunk Rudy Giuliani.

On the Fourth day of Treason
The Trumpers gave to me:
Four Seasons sod,
Three wedding vows,
Two tiny hands,
And a drunk Rudy Giuliani.

On the Fifth day of Treason
The Trumpers gave to me:
Five grifting kids,
Four Seasons sod,
Three wedding vows,
Two tiny hands,
And a drunk Rudy Giuliani.

On the Sixth day of Treason
The Trumpers gave to me:
Six Steve Mnuchins,
Five grifting kids,
Four Seasons sod,
Three wedding vows,
Two tiny hands,
And a drunk Rudy Giuliani.

On the Seventh day of Treason
The Trumpers gave to me:
Seven fake reporters,
Six Steve Mnuchins,
Five grifting kids,
Four Seasons sod,
Three wedding vows,
Two tiny hands,
And a drunk Rudy Giuliani.

On the Eighth day of Treason
The Trumpers gave to me:
Eight million voters,
Seven fake reporters,
Six Steve Mnuchins,
Five grifting kids,
Four Seasons sod,
Three wedding vows,
Two tiny hands,
And a drunk Rudy Giuliani.

On the Ninth day of Treason
The Trumpers gave to me:
Nine misspelled twitters,
Eight million voters,
Seven fake reporters,
Six Steve Mnuchins,
Five grifting kids,
Four Seasons sod,
Three wedding vows,
Two tiny hands,
And a drunk Rudy Giuliani.

On the Tenth day of Treason
The Trumpers gave to me:
Ten pending lawsuits,
Nine misspelled twitters,
Eight million voters,
Seven fake reporters,
Six Steve Mnuchins,
Five grifting kids,
Four Seasons sod,
Three wedding vows,
Two tiny hands,
And a drunk Rudy Giuliani.

On the Eleventh day of Treason
The Trumpers gave to me:
Eleven MAGA rallies,
Ten pending lawsuits,
Nine misspelled twitters,
Eight million voters,
Seven fake reporters,
Six Steve Mnuchins,
Five grifting kids,
Four Seasons sod,
Three wedding vows,
Two tiny hands,
And a drunk Rudy Giuliani.

On the Twelfth day of Treason
The Trumpers gave to me:
Twelve Sharpies signing,
Eleven MAGA rallies,
Ten pending lawsuits,
Nine misspelled twitters,
Eight million voters,
Seven fake reporters,
Six Steve Mnuchins,
Five grifting kids,
Four Seasons sod,
Three wedding vows,
Two tiny hands,
And a drunk Rudy Giuliani.

? Song requested by MomSense, and as always, SD delivers.

Reader Interactions

124Comments

  15. 15.

    Villago Delenda Est

    That was…cathartic.  “Five grifting kids” is better than “Five golden toques” any day of the week!

  17. 17.

    Le Comte de Monte Cristo, fka Edmund Dantes

    To “Santa Claus is Coming to Town”:

    You’d better give up on Christmas this year,

    You haven’t a chance until Biden is here,

    Donald Trump has fucked us again.

    He’s ignoring the stats, and tweeting a lot,

    You’d think he’d care more, but he clearly does not,

    Donald Trump has fucked us, again.

    He’ll monopolize the public space, and tweet so goddamned rude

    He’ll golf and spread his virus and show shitty attitude…

    Thre’s only one way to save your noel, tell Old Trump to go back to his hotel,

    Donald Trump has fucked us again….

  21. 21.

    Goku (aka Amerikan Baka)

    Oh, and in case anybody was wondering about Adam, I received an email back from him today and he’s fine, just had a busy last week

  24. 24.

    C Stars

    Amazing!! Made my day.

     

    Earlier today as we were walking by a construction site my 7 yo asked me if he could have a backhoe for X-mas. We had a 15 minute conversation about the costs of construction equipment. So tonight when I open BJ on my phone the pop-up ad is for John Deere heavy machinery. I hate it that my phone is spying on me but love it when the formula gets me so wrong.

  32. 32.

    Suzanne

    I feel like savoring a tall glass of wingnut tears. Breitbart is fairly subdued at the moment. Wonder why.

  35. 35.

    Dan B

    @C Stars:  My brother was given a toy front loader from a contractor whose kids had outgrown it. His daughter’s family was visiting this week and the three year old played with that toy as many hours a day as he could.  I hope the kid got to take it home to Bend.

    New the toy was about $350!

  42. 42.

    Splitting Image

    Trumpty Dumpty promised a Wall.
    Trumpty Dumpty had a bad Fall.
    All of his lawyers and all of his Glenns

    Couldn’t put Trumpty together again.

  46. 46.

    SFAW

    Outstanding work, SD!  I bet there are some carolers (if they’re allowed this year, of course) who would gladly house-by-house serenade their neighbors with this song. Might not make it as big as “Alice’s Restaurant,” but still.

  52. 52.

    Ken

    @Capri: The Trumpiest person on my Facebook feed posted that there was never a war on Christmas and Happy Holidays is ok.

    Finding that happy medium between Fox’s war on Christmas and Melania’s f*ck Christmas?

  56. 56.

    divF

    Brava, SiubhanDuinne!

    I will add my own poor contribution: “Nothing in his presidency became him like the leaving it”.

  58. 58.

    mrmoshpotato

    @Capri: The Trumpiest person on my Facebook feed posted that there was never a war on Christmas and Happy Holidays is ok. Baby steps

    Praise be!  /S

  60. 60.

    RandomMonster

    It’s really quite brilliant!

    Forgive me for wanting “Five golden showers” because, well, it’s Christmas…

  61. 61.

    raven

    Jesus, one would hope a couple weeks in quarantine would have let Rachel think about how she presents information. We get it, they are 86’ing the fucking planes.

  67. 67.

    raven

    @mrmoshpotato:

     

    It’s probably very important but she did her repeat the dame info about 5 times!

    The Trump administration formally shut the door on the Open Skies treaty Sunday, exiting the agreement while moving to get rid of the U.S. Air Force planes that have been used to carry out the nearly three-decade-old accord.

    President Trump had served notice in May that the U.S. would withdraw in six months from the accord, which was intended to reduce the risk of war by allowing Russia and the West to carry out unarmed reconnaissance flights over each other’s territories. U.S. officials, however, have long complained that Moscow hasn’t fully complied with its terms.

  73. 73.

    mrmoshpotato

    @Spanky: Any chance of a turkey pardoning Trump this week?

    No.  They’re smarter than to want to incur the wrath of 78+ million of us.  (Especially those of us who own axes and knives.)

  77. 77.

    Dorothy A. Winsor

    @mrmoshpotato: I was just listening to that. Apparently there are two plane specially outfitted to carry out the Open Skies flights. Trump has ordered them to be decommissioned and classified them as military scrap. He also cancelled the funding for new ones.

  82. 82.

    prostratedragon

    @mrmoshpotato:  They’ll have to get renewed spending authorization.

     

    Edit: Actually I appreciated her build-up, knowing nothing about the program. Made it clear what a reckless and nasty move this is, though somebody or other might feel aided and comforted by it, and also yet another reason why we need at least two more Democrats in the Senate.

  85. 85.

    Wyatt Salamanca

    SiubhanDuinne, you absolutely nailed it!

    And a drunk Rudy Giuliani.

    Giuliani is a fucking disgrace to New York and to the legal profession. I know it would be a heavy lift but this cocksucker needs to have his law license taken away.

  86. 86.

    CaseyL

    I don’t know the chain of command for declaring something military surplus and disposing of it. Is it possible for the people who have to implement the order to slow walk it for a couple of months?

  87. 87.

    mrmoshpotato

    @raven: Yes, I understand than hurdle.  I was wondering if any other hurdles were thrown in Biden’s way like when a Rethuglican legislature fucks over an incoming Democratic governor’s ability to actually, ya know, govern.

  88. 88.

    Patricia Kayden

    These TV pundits are still trying to figure out what Donald Trump's "off ramp" is going to be. His off ramp is going to be prison.— Palmer Report (@PalmerReport) November 23, 2020

  91. 91.

    Redshift

    @Spanky: Since I’m still on the White House email list, I got the invitation to participate in choosing which turkeys to pardon. I didn’t click through, since I assume there was no option for “not Giuliani, Flynn, Don Jr….”

  92. 92.

    Miss Bianca

    I might actually have to warble that a time or two around the Mountain Hacienda this holiday season. Libations may or may not be involved. Brava, SD!

  93. 93.

    Yutsano

    @CaseyL: Inb4 Leto here, but if any government agency can slow walk anything it’s the United States Air Force. Hell those planes could sit tidy in their hangers until late January 2021 and not have a part removed from them save whatever needs to be replaced. I highly doubt they’ll be on the trash heap that quickly, especially for an unpopular outgoing Commander in Chief.

  95. 95.

    Redshift

    Woo, my covid test came back negative, so I can do more than just wave at my parents from the car on Thanksgiving! They’re local, and we’re still not eating together. But at least I can go in to pick up food and say hi.

  98. 98.

    Lexiltucky

    Delurking for the 1st time in years.  That was simply Fantastic !!   It was just what I needed at this time.

    Thanks, SD !!

  100. 100.

    TS (the original)

    @raven:

    I hope Biden & Co have a list to repeat over and over to the media as to what trump has trashed on his way out the door.

  103. 103.

    Kent

    @raven:

    The Trump administration formally shut the door on the Open Skies treaty Sunday, exiting the agreement while moving to get rid of the U.S. Air Force planes that have been used to carry out the nearly three-decade-old accord.

    President Trump had served notice in May that the U.S. would withdraw in six months from the accord, which was intended to reduce the risk of war by allowing Russia and the West to carry out unarmed reconnaissance flights over each other’s territories. U.S. officials, however, have long complained that Moscow hasn’t fully complied with its terms.

    I honestly know nothing about this.  But in this day and age in 2020 when you can count someone’s nose hairs via satellite, does it really matter whether we have actual planes flying over each other’s territory anymore?

    I mean, the Russians can just use Google street view.  Is there some reason we actually need to fly planes over Russia anymore?

  109. 109.

    cain

    The folks in /r/politics have been having a fun time watching the meltdown in /r/donaldtrump and /r/conservative on Reddit.

    So awesome. Depress that turnout!

    The butthurt is real… now let’s all say it together “fuck their feelings”

  110. 110.

    Another Scott

    @Kent:

    FAS on Open Skies:

    When the Treaty first enters into effect [in 1992], observation aircraft will be allowed to carry panoramic, framing and video cameras as well sideways- looking synthetic aperture radar (SAR). During the first three years, observation aircraft will be allowed to carry infra-red (IR) scanning devices if both parties agree on that particular flight, but after three years, IR scanning may be used on any flight.

    Even though sensor resolution is somewhat constrained, the sensors will provide information that cannot be acquired by commercial satellites. Industrial equipment, vehicles and minor facility modifications can be identified, and people engaged in activities can be detected.

    The SAR permits observation aircraft to perform their missions in bad weather and at night. The infra-red scanner will allow the aircraft to “see” differences in the temperature of objects on the ground, especially operating machinery or vehicles, even through thin coverings such as camouflage netting.

    Transparency helps fight mistrust.

    “Jaw Jaw is better than War War.”

    And the way to get Putin to agree to a treaty’s terms is to use the treaty enforcement mechanisms. Not flip over the table and scream “UNFAIR!!”…

    Cheers,
    Scott.

  114. 114.

    J R in WV

    @Dorothy A. Winsor:

    Apparently there are two plane specially outfitted to carry out the Open Skies flights. Trump has ordered them to be decommissioned and classified them as military scrap.

    Scrapped military planes are flown to Davis-Motham AFB in Tucson, where they are towed to what is known as the Boneyard, hundreds of “scrapped” military planes parked in the desert sun. They are not “crushed” or otherwise wrecked, as they parts on board each plane are too valuable.

    They recently reclaimed a B-52 from the Boneyard that was in pretty good shape compared to scrapped B-52 they were replacing.

    I can not believe that the AF will actually damage an aircraft still in flying condition. I’m sure it is scrapped and towed into the Boneyard. I recommend everyone go to Google Maps or Google Earth and look in SE Tucson for the hundreds of aircraft parked in the Boneyard.

    You can actually drive right past the Boneyard and see lots of great looking aircraft parked in the desert. There’s actually an Air Museum there, which I bet one of these specialty aircraft would be parked in…

    We shall see how that works out.

  116. 116.

    Steeplejack

    @CaseyL:

    According to Maddow’s report, the government is supposed to “consult” with Congress for four months before screwing with the Open Skies Treaty. Which of course has not been done. Yet another “guardrail” that has been plowed through. But perhaps this can be turned against Trump et al.

  120. 120.

    JAFD

    @C Stars: My uncle once wanted to expand his construction business, acquire now equipment.  But the neighbors objected…

    They didn’t want to live on a two-backhoe road.

  121. 121.

    Dan B

    @C Stars: The toy front loader was stored outside. One day it started to rain and the 3 year old started to cry.  They had to find a spot to keep it dry – it is plastic, but don’t logic a 3 yo.  He said  “That’s good.” once it was under cover.

    My brother was “impressed” by the price.

  122. 122.

    Omnes Omnibus

    @Yutsano: The military is capable of moving very quickly when it wants to.  It is also capable of moving very slowly.  I am sure there are forms to be filled out.  Someone needs to make sure that they are filled out properly.  So they need to get filled out again.  The they need to be sent to the next office for approval.  What?  They got sent to MG Smith’s office and he is on leave?  Well, someone needs to check if he needs to sign them or if his deputy can do it.  And so on….  And that’s without anything getting temporarily misfiled.

  123. 123.

    Dan B

    @JAFD: We were working on a private island in the San Juan Islands.  There was a runway with a dozen homes along one side with Air Ports, like car ports and a tiny dock and marina.  We had a semi with 70 cubic yards of bark mulch arrive via barge.  The semi proceeded to go off the road at the hairpin turn above the marina.  It was hanging 30 feet above the harbor.  We had barged in a backhoe so my foreman raced on over and managed to pull the semi back on the road.

    And that was not the hardest experience I’ve had with big equipment.  But being an hour from emergency assistance sharpens the mind.

  124. 124.

    JPL

    SD,   This is awesome, and I’m pleased that I didn’t see it until this morning.   It’s a great way to start the day.

Comments are closed.