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Marge, god is saying you’re stupid.

Hi god, it’s us. Thanks a heap, you’re having a great week and it’s only Thursday!

The real work of an opposition party is to oppose.

Disappointing to see gov. newsom with his finger to the wind.

If America since Jan 2025 hasn’t broken your heart, you haven’t loved her enough.

Let the trolls come, and then ignore them. that’s the worst thing you can do to a troll.

He really is that stupid.

How stupid are these people?

“Alexa, change the president.”

Many life forms that would benefit from greater intelligence, sadly, do not have it.

Giving up is unforgivable.

Let me file that under fuck it.

Jack be nimble, jack be quick, hurry up and indict this prick.

“When somebody takes the time to draw up a playbook, they’re gonna use it.”

Dumb motherfuckers cannot understand a consequence that most 4 year olds have fully sorted out.

You don’t get rid of your umbrella while it’s still raining.

Sadly, media malpractice has become standard practice.

It’s easy to sit in safety and prescribe what other people should be doing.

Take hopelessness and turn it into resilience.

They were going to turn on one another at some point. It was inevitable.

The lights are all blinking red.

Shallow, uninformed, and lacking identity

Shut up, hissy kitty!

I would try pessimism, but it probably wouldn’t work.

You are here: Home / Open Threads / Another Middle-Aged White Male Embarrassment

Another Middle-Aged White Male Embarrassment

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I went down a rabbit hole this afternoon, watching the proceedings of the North Dakota House from yesterday, when they voted to expel a member for the first time in history due to a pattern of harassing women. That member, Luke Simons, sounds like a real piece of work.

One of his main targets was a 29 year-old woman, Rep Emily O’Brien, also a Republican. When she was pregnant a couple of years ago, she had to move her desk on the floor as far as possible from Simons to avoid his constant harassment. Her floor speech is a little hard to find (start here and look for her name on the right), but here’s her statement on Facebook. Her speech was brave and painfully honest, relating how he embarrassed her in front of a guest she had brought to the floor of the House, and how his comments about a dress she wore led her to never wear it again.

She also told a story about Simons mentioning that his wife liked to wear thongs, and sometimes he did, too. This was in the context of his discussion of being kicked out of a shopping mall in Montana for open carrying. (That’s an asshole trifecta: disclosing your wife’s underwear choice, telling people yours, and open carrying.) O’Brien’s speech (and statement) also had a long list of stupid sexist remarks like Simons’ deep insight that she would make a good secretary since she could type so well.

O’Brien represents Grand Forks, a university town, and her seat was held by a Democrat a couple of sessions back. A quick look at her website shows a pretty anodyne, relatively apolitical set of good government positions. Frankly, I could see some independents and Democrats voting for her simply because it’s better to have a decent Republican representing you in a very Republican legislature, than a Democrat who’s part of a tiny 14 member minority in a 94 seat body.

When we talk of flipping state legislatures, you have to realize that being a small state rep is an incredibly shitty job. The salary for a member of the North Dakota House is $515 per month plus per diem while they are in session. There’s one House member for every 6,194 adults in the state. The House is in session during odd-numbered years for the four coldest months of the year (January-April), when temperatures in Bismarck regularly hit -20 F, and blizzards are frequent. It’s no mystery why jerks like Simons end up in the job, since he probably didn’t have a lot of competition.

(If you want to see another example of the kind of person who gets elected to these small state legislatures, be sure to have brain bleach handy before you click that link.)

Reader Interactions

56Comments

  1. 1.

    germy

    “I know exactly how Judge Kavanaugh feels now,” Simons said. “[They] have come against my character, and these allegations are simply not true.” He added he has more than two years of recordings of past conversations that disprove the accusations.

    He played the Bart Card!

  3. 3.

    germy

    This conservative account offers what they believe is a defense of Simons:

    Luke Simons told a colleague to "f**k off" after she ordered him to wear a face mask.

    Then, local media drummed up a series of unsubstantiated reports of harassment, and his fellow Republicans ejected him from the North Dakota legislature.https://t.co/cHZCGCd7Nh

    — National File (@NationalFile) March 5, 2021

  6. 6.

    Four Seasons Total Landscaping mistermix

    @germy: One of the interesting things about this whole debacle is that the ND leg adopted an anti-harassment rule during the last session, and it was cited quite a bit in the floor debate that I watched.  I’m guessing that part of the reason that rule was adopted was this asshole’s behavior.

  7. 7.

    comrade scotts agenda of rage

    Not being familiar with the ND Constitution and potentially relevant legal codes governing this, they toss his ass out, then what happens? Who names a replacement? Special election? Could this asshole simply run again in a special election?

  8. 8.

    JoyceH

    She also told a story about Simons mentioning that his wife liked to wear thongs, and sometimes he did, too. This was in the context of his discussion of being kicked out of a shopping mall in Montana for open carrying.

    I’d need more context for this conversation but if this was in context of what one was wearing at a shopping mall, I feel the need to point out that thongs is another term for flip-flops. I’d think flip-flops would be more visible than underwear in a mall setting.

  9. 9.

    Four Seasons Total Landscaping mistermix

    @catclub:

    I was expecting O’Brien to get ejected by the GOP legislature.

    What happens in these far right states is that there’s a group of somewhat reasonable Republicans, and another group of shitpost lib-owning Republicans.  In ND, it looks like the 55 of the Republicans are relatively reasonable, and 25 of them are shitpost lib owners.  (The vote was 69-25.  Net the 14 Democrats out of the 69 and you have 55 somewhat reasonable Republicans.)

  10. 10.

    Four Seasons Total Landscaping mistermix

    @JoyceH:

    I’d need more context for this conversation but if this was in context of what one was wearing at a shopping mall, I feel the need to point out that thongs is another term for flip-flops. I’d think flip-flops would be more visible than underwear in a mall setting.

    It was underwear — I watched O’Brien’s speech and it was clear.  Also, nobody in the Dakotas calls flip-flops “thongs”.  I believe that’s what Australians call them.

  11. 11.

    Mary G

    I know it intellectually, but I still get gobsmacked when I see the ND numbers. I live in a Southern California town that still likes to consider itself a village, and each member of the city council represents approximately 13,000 people.

  12. 12.

    Gravenstone

    @germy: Gee, wonder why he feels compelled to record so many conversations? Unfortunately NoDak is a single party consent state when it comes to such recordings. I was hoping he’d get slammed for that admission.

  13. 13.

    Brachiator

    @Four Seasons Total Landscaping mistermix:

    In ND, it looks like the 55 of the Republicans are relatively reasonable, and 25 of them are shitpost lib owners. (The vote was 69-25. Net the 14 Democrats out of the 69 and you have 55 somewhat reasonable Republicans.)

    That sounds about right.

  16. 16.

    Brachiator

    Her speech was brave and painfully honest, relating how he embarrassed her in front of a guest she had brought to the floor of the House, and how his comments about a dress she wore led her to never wear it again.

    Should not even have been necessary.  There should at least be senior reps who have some power to enforce rules of decorum.

  17. 17.

    Another Scott

    Speaking of embarrassing Republicans… BlueVirginia.US:

    Just when you start thinking there’s no way the Virginia GOP can become any more of a dumpster fire, cluster-you-know-what, etc. check this out! That’s right, the Virginia Republicans sent their crack “Survey Team” to check out the parking lot facilities at Liberty University, where they had hoped to hold their nominating convention for their 2021 statewide candidates on May 8, and…

    “…the team concluded that a statewide convention of delegates on a single off-campus LU property is not feasible. The convergence of as many as 4,000 automobiles and 70 buses at a single venue makes that impossible.”

    Maybe they should have thought about this BEFORE they selected this option? Just a thought. So now what? VA GOP Chair Rich Anderson writes:

    “I will call [a State Central Committee – SCC] meeting that will convene next week to discuss proposals that have been put forth for a convention configuration that employs satellite locations across Virginia.”

    Satellites, eh? Like maybe shoot this whole thing into outer space? Oh, different kind of “satellites?” LOL As for how Anderson feels at this point, “fatigued” seems like a very mild word for it. But from a Democratic perspective, the longer Republicans’ comically absurd dysfunction continues, the better. Hell, let it continue through 2021, 2022 and beyond, while Democrats focus on governing the state (and the country)!

    Republicans in Disarray!! Heh.

    Cheers,
    Scott.

  18. 18.

    JoyceH

    @Four Seasons Total Landscaping mistermix:

     

    Also, nobody in the Dakotas calls flip-flops “thongs”. I believe that’s what Australians call them.

    That’s what we called them in Southern Illinois in the 50s and 60s. First time I hear ‘thong’ in reference to underwear, I was baffled.

  19. 19.

    Four Seasons Total Landscaping mistermix

    @JoyceH:

    That’s what we called them in Southern Illinois in the 50s and 60s. First time I hear ‘thong’ in reference to underwear, I was baffled.

    Interesting. Someone needs to make a “thong vs flip-flop” map similar to the pop vs soda map.

  20. 20.

    feebog

    Pretty clear from the link that the Republican leadership enabled him for years.  Then the lawyers got involved, no doubt letting them know they might have personal liability unless they took action, and they lowered the boom.

  21. 21.

    Leto

    @Another Scott: lets keep the trend going:

    State Department aide appointed by Trump stormed the Capitol, beat police with a riot shield, FBI says

    The FBI said Thursday that it arrested a political appointee of President Donald Trump on charges that he stormed the U.S. Capitol on Jan. 6 and assaulted an officer with a weapon, marking the first arrest of a Trump administration official in connection with the insurrection.

    Federico Guillermo Klein, a former State Department official, made an initial appearance by teleconference on Friday before U.S. Magistrate Zia M. Faruqui in Washington, where prosecutors said they would seek to jail him pending trial at a hearing next Wednesday.

    The court papers obtained by The Washington Post detail Klein’s alleged conduct throughout the siege of the Capitol, tracing his apparent movements and actions from using a police shield to try to pry a door open, to calling for reinforcements from the crowd, to losing his red “Make America Great Again” baseball cap, looking for it amid the chaos, and then grabbing another red hat on the ground that turned out to be the wrong one.

    Klein’s arrest is the most direct link yet between the Trump administration and the rioters, despite attempts by some conservatives to dissociate the insurrection from the former president. Many of the 300-plus people who have been charged in connection with the insurrection have described themselves as Trump supporters, while some have ties to extremist groups like the Proud Boys, which Canada has designated a terrorist group, and the Oath Keepers.

    Klein, who is also a former Trump campaign employee, did not respond to a request for comment. A State Department spokesman said Klein served as a political appointee in the department from 2017 until his resignation in January. “This is being investigated by FBI, and they are the appropriate agency to answer questions specific to the charges,” the spokesman said.

    @Four Seasons Total Landscaping mistermix: Queen’s English speaking people call them “thongs”, so wide swarth of people.

  23. 23.

    JoyceH

    @Leto: ​
     

    Plus, if you’re discussing what’s actually on your body, you’d say ‘thong’ if it was the underwear and ‘thongs’ if flip-flops.

  24. 24.

    citizen dave

    There is just no need for two Dakotas.

    I get that so many of these incidents and various insurrections are perpetrated by whites, but I’m getting really tired of white bashing, or “any” bashing.  Everyone is an individual.  Also over the use of “karen” to mean a certain type of woman.  It’s lazy.

  25. 25.

    Geminid

    @Another Scott: I sometimes think the Republican State Central Commitee set the convention up to fail. That way they themselves will have to choose the nominees. They are terrified that State Senator Amanda Chase would come out on top with a plurality if they hold a primary. She could even win a ranked choice convention vote. Either way, they fear, Chase would drag the rest of the ticket into the Dismal Swamp.

  27. 27.

    Brachiator

    @Four Seasons Total Landscaping mistermix:

    Interesting. Someone needs to make a “thong vs flip-flop” map similar to the pop vs soda map.

    When I was in college it would get on my nerves to hear people say “pop” instead of soda.

    It also irritated me when people talked about standing on line instead of getting in line.

    But then I realized what a small linguistic bubble I previously had lived in.

  28. 28.

    hells littlest angel

    He added he has more than two years of recordings of past conversations that disprove the accusations.

    Jeffrey Dahmer’s trove of pictures of himself not eating people didn’t help his case, either. There’s no justice in this world.

  30. 30.

    Chat Noir

    @Mary G:  Out of curiosity, I looked on Google Maps to see what town this asshole represents. It’s just off I-94 due west of Bismarck, out in the sticks. The town has a population of around 17,000. I think Los Angeles County alone has a population similar to that of 8 western states combined.

  32. 32.

    Freemark

    From the WP article:

    Simons, 43, who represents Dickinson, his hometown, first won office in 2016. The barber, rancher and father of five is also a member of the Bastiat Caucus, a state group of Trump-aligned legislators.

    In that article I correctly misread ‘Bastiat Caucus’ as ‘Batshit Caucus’ the first time through.

  35. 35.

    brantl

    @Freemark: In that article I correctly misread ‘Bastiat Caucus’ as ‘Batshit Caucus’ the first time through.

     

    Perfectly understandable, and probably 99% the same.

  38. 38.

    Boris Rasputin (the evil twin)

    @citizen dave: I agree on the use of the name “Karen”  like that, as the women named Karen that I’ve known are all very decent ladies. We should call the insufferable sorts “Ivanka”.

  39. 39.

    Enhanced Voting Techniques

    When she was pregnant a couple of years ago, she had to move her desk on the floor as far as possible from Simon

    What kind of man mashes on a pregnant woman? Clear violation of man law.

  41. 41.

    trollhattan

    @Four Seasons Total Landscaping mistermix: 
    I learned them to be “zori” as a kid, since that’s what they were labeled in stores. Then Chinese kids started calling them “Jap flaps” and all kinds of trouble ensued.

    So yeah, would be an interesting little cultural research project.

  42. 42.

    Jim, Foolish Literalist

    @trollhattan: I have a vague memory of seeing zori in a  book and having to look it up– Stephen King? When I was a kid in the midwest in the 70s, they were thongs. Then flip-flops.

  44. 44.

    Geminid

    @Jim, Foolish Literalist: I remember this kind of footwear being called zoris the few years a lived in Southern California as a kid. But as to the question of what the State legislator was talking about wearing at the mall, I doubt very much that he was talking about flip flops. Especially since he is a farmer and a Republican.

  45. 45.

    There go two miscreants

    Yeah, my mother always called them zoris; my sisters wore them when we were younger. I also recall flip-flops being common. The first time I heard them called thongs was in the Beach Boys song (from possibly defective memory):

    Tee shirt, cutoffs, and a pair of thongs,

    We’ve been havin’ fun all summer long.

    (Also, yay, Visual Tab for the first time today)

  48. 48.

    RSA

    @JoyceH:

    I’d need more context for this conversation but if this was in context of what one was wearing at a shopping mall, I feel the need to point out that thongs is another term for flip-flops.

    From O’Brien’s FB page, where she posted a copy of a letter addressed to the members of the ND Assembly:

    How do you… proceed to tell her [a legislative employee] about shopping for thongs at Victoria’s Secret because that’s what [your] wife likes to wear—and then “jokingly” [add] that you enjoy wearing them also…

  49. 49.

    RSA

    @germy:

    Then, local media drummed up a series of unsubstantiated reports of harassment, and his fellow Republicans ejected him from the North Dakota legislature.

    Unsurprisingly, this turns out to be a conservative media lie.

    The historic vote marked the end of a contentious battle over Simons behavior, which was detailed in a report released last week by the legislature’s nonpartisan research agency…

  51. 51.

    Rand Careaga

    @trollhattan: “Zori” was the usage when I was a nipper in suburban Southern California in the fifties and sixties. I had ceased to wear these long before I ever encountered the other nomenclatures.

  56. 56.

    SFAW

    Simons: “I didn’t get due process!”

    Sane persons: “OK, fine, but we’re going to try you for something where the penalty is 20 years in prison”

    Simons: “Uh, about that ‘due process’ thing …”

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