Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

Thanks to your bullshit, we are now under siege.

One of our two political parties is a cult whose leader admires Vladimir Putin.

One way or another, he’s a liar.

Relentless negativity is not a sign that you are more realistic.

No one could have predicted…

There are a lot more evil idiots than evil geniuses.

Rupert, come get your orange boy, you petrified old dinosaur turd.

This chaos was totally avoidable.

The gop is a fucking disgrace.

Authoritarian republicans are opposed to freedom for the rest of us.

When they say they are pro-life, they do not mean yours.

Perhaps you mistook them for somebody who gives a damn.

Historically it was a little unusual for the president to be an incoherent babbling moron.

Let’s not be the monsters we hate.

Their freedom requires your slavery.

So many bastards, so little time.

Putting aside our relentless self-interest because the moral imperative is crystal clear.

Their boy Ron is an empty plastic cup that will never know pudding.

Let me file that under fuck it.

When we show up, we win.

Damn right I heard that as a threat.

When I was faster i was always behind.

This isn’t Democrats spending madly. This is government catching up.

Jesus, Mary, & Joseph how is that election even close?

You are here: Home / John Cole Presents "This Fucking Old House" / Mistakes Were Made and Advice Was Ignored

Mistakes Were Made and Advice Was Ignored

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Pretty day today and things are in bloom, so I thought would take a picture of my beautiful trees in the front yard:

Mistakes Were Made and Advice Was Ignored

I just can’t wait until they are towering over the house. That one branch on the tree to the left that crosses the sidewalk is about 7 feet tall, and I am so excited that in about 5-10 years it will connect with the tree to the right and form a canopy.

Speaking of trees that have grown:

Mistakes Were Made and Advice Was Ignored 1

The apple tree to the left was bigger than the willow when I planted it, and I planted it two years before the willow. We’re a couple years away from my entire yard becoming a life support system for the willow tree, and I am ok with that. I imagine Pooh and Piglet sitting underneath enjoying the shade while Eeyore whines that the willow is too close to the house.

BTW, if you are wondering what filter I am using for these pictures, it is called “Smudge on the lens.”

Reader Interactions

56Comments

  5. 5.

    Chief Oshkosh

    That willow tree is too close to where the Chinese think their rocket is going to hit.

  6. 6.

    CaseyL

    A little piece of paradise, John. You’ve made a wonderful home and yard.

    ….though you do need a pond under that willow. Just saying.

  10. 10.

    Starfish

    It is amazing how beautiful you have made this place given the way it started out.

  13. 13.

    Old Dan and Little Ann

    Looking good.  We had a huge Fucking Willow Tree in our backyard as a kid.  I played on, in, and around it for hours as a kid.  It was amazing.  Before school when I was 16 I was standing at the kitchen sink drinking a glass of water and staring at our humongous Weeping Willow.  The wind was blowing and toppled that thing right over. I couldn’t believe it.  I shouted, “HOLY SHIT, DAD!  The willow tree tipped over!” Lol… 30 years later I can see it clear as day still.

  15. 15.

    Ken

    It’s amazing how well the landscaping hides the defensive emplacements. The teams redoing the White House security system could take lessons from John.

  19. 19.

    jl

    Thanks. Great pix, looks like a beautiful olde-tymey beauty garden on the way.

    Edit: since Cole mentioned it: one willow is too close to the house. Another willow is too far from the house. And a third willow can never be just the right distance the house. And another should be inside the house, which is not properly built for that.

  21. 21.

    Zelma

    Lovely.  When I remember what the place looked like when you bought it, I am amazed.  I also remember all the complaining.  Was it worth it?

  22. 22.

    Yutsano

    I haven’t seen this on the blog yet (i haven’t looked everywhere) but the goodest boy Bo died. :(

    Today our family lost a true friend and loyal companion. For more than a decade, Bo was a constant, gentle presence in our lives—happy to see us on our good days, our bad days, and everyday in between. pic.twitter.com/qKMNojiu9V— Barack Obama (@BarackObama) May 8, 2021

  25. 25.

    jackmac

    Willows are lovely and fast growers and I’ve loved to hear wind whisper through their branches. Unfortunately, they also do not last long. We planted two traditional willows on our lot in the early 1990s and within a decade both had fallen. We also have several corkscrew willows which I curse the day I planted them. After robust growth and heights reaching up to 50 feet, the corkscrews are now mostly thick dead trunks and branches waiting to topple. Trees on my property that don’t cause trouble include a skinny sycamore sapling planted about 30 years ago that’s now mature, tall and majestic. We also have a 25-year-old maple that has a wide spread of branches and leaves and is popular with the neighborhood robins.

  27. 27.

    Mary G

    It looks like an “after”  picture from a home design magazine. I believe your house is blessed by the spirit of Walter. I would like to be under the willow with Pooh, Piglet, and Eeyore, pls thanx bai.

    ???????

  28. 28.

    WaterGirl

    The house looks great!

    John, is that a new color for the steps?  That color really makes everything pop. The steps look more blue than gray, and I remember them looking more gray than blue.

  29. 29.

    JoyceH

    I planted a willow in my back yard which grew nicely for ten years and then died. My mowing guy said of course it died, there’s not enough water there. So – huh.

  30. 30.

    Dan B

    Do not fertilize the willow!

     

    Question:  Jackals, will this advice be heeded?  What are the chances?

  32. 32.

    Dan B

    @jackmac: Corkscrew willows are plants that grab people in nurseries.  I’m surprised they aren’t in every yard.  And I’m surprised there aren’t more casualties.  Maybe they’re too scary for kids to sit under once they start dying.

  33. 33.

    Hoppie

    @jackmac:  I remember the year a giant holly in our previous front yard had a superabundance of berries, and dozens of robins got stoned for days.

  36. 36.

    stinger

    Beautiful, John. Your neighbors must be so pleased with what you’ve done with the place. And you must feel great joy when you walk down the sidewalk and come HOME.

  37. 37.

    sukabi

    Very nice John! I remember when you were looking at buying it, and your falling through the porch….and finding Walter abandoned in it.

     

    You’ve done a fantastic job….?

  39. 39.

    Amir Khalid

    I just came back from a short and fruitless attempt to go to the supermarket: the building was closed for a three-day Covid-19 cleansing. Feh.

  43. 43.

    Chris T.

    @Amir Khalid: Fizzy koala juice!? You monster! You … oh, kola. Never mind.

    (Actually, is koala juice made for koalas, or out of koalas?)

  45. 45.

    MaryRC

    @HumboldtBlue: What a great story about these two spirited women.

    John, your house and grounds look beautiful.  I always think of Walter when I see pictures of your house, and how you took good care of him too when he needed you.

  46. 46.

    Gvg

    @Old Dan and Little Ann: I remember the morning our family found the eucalyptus tree had fallen on our week old car. It was quite a shock. I was in elementary school. It was a large silver dollar tree like they use in dried flower arrangements. It looked like a total expensive disaster and needed up being harmless. My mother called around and found a florist to pay for the tree removal. At the time it was a popular high priced decorator thing to have small silver dollar trees inside made from large branches, plus filler for all kinds of dried flower arrangements. I imagine he made money.
    And then when the tree was gone, it turned out it didn’t weigh much and the branches were so full and springy, that the car was unhurt.  My parents were both either late to work or didn’t get there though because they couldn’t get their cars out of the driveway due to the tree. I went to school on the bus, and got home in time to see the last few pieces being out. Very surprised the car was fine.

  47. 47.

    lowtechcyclist

    Speaking of trees that have grown:

    And see the tree, how big it’s grown,
    but friend it hasn’t been too long, it wasn’t big…

    :ducks & runs:​​​​​

  50. 50.

    Kristine

    Lovely yard, Cole. You’ve worked wonders with that property. Spirit of Walter indeed.

  51. 51.

    J R in WV

    So pretty, after such an inauspicious start. So glad you were in time to save Walter, who was such a good handsome boy after you saved him. The pictures are great, colorful, and the smudge filter works so well.

    No mistakes were made, that I can tell from here.

    And thanks for the blog, which has gotten so many of us through some tough times.

  52. 52.

    Uncle Cosmo

    @Old Dan and Little Ann:In the 50s the far side of the avenue we lived on was vacant save for a huge old dark brown house surrounded by huge old willow trees. One of my earliest memories is when Hurricane Hazel came barreling up the East Coast , and I watched from our front window as those trees, massive drooping branches windwhipped into a frenzy, seemed to perform a ghostly Totentanz about the sinister house…

    (The widow who lived in that house owned a huge swath of property behind and to either side of it. When she passed, I’m guessing in 1959, the land was sold off, & within a few years sported a church, two schools with their athletic fields, a new road to connect them, and what was then the biggest supermarket in the area, whose entrance in its current incarnation still faces directly across from what was our front door.)

  56. 56.

    way2blue

    John,

    Your yards—front & back—are glorious.  And put mine to shame.  Please post some ‘before’ photos for those of us who can’t quite remember the start…

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