Here’s an American pipehitter, but I don’t know about his inclination to apologize, fight for the future, or give an inch:

by @heymistermix.com| 147 Comments
This post is in: Open Threads
Calling all unapologetic Americans to join me and become a Pipehitter. https://t.co/KO15jutDPi
— Mike Pompeo (@mikepompeo) June 15, 2021
Here’s an American pipehitter, but I don’t know about his inclination to apologize, fight for the future, or give an inch:
Comments are closed.
Elizabelle
LOL. Pipehitting? It’s as good as teabagging.
WTF?!
waspuppet
These people are freaks, and not in the good way, and we don’t point that out nearly enough.
Ken
This is like a twelve-year-old boy trying to get people to use the cool nickname he wishes he had. Except the kid’s not about to get twitter-dragged.
opiejeanne
@Ken:
Stop trying to make fetch happen.
Gravenstone
They’re trying soooo hard to be “cool”. And it’s never going to happen.
piratedan
I know we’re not exactly proponents of Capital Punishment here, but I would be happy to put all these folks into a multi-billion dollar spaceship and launch them into the cosmos on a fact-finding mission that would take centuries… direction really doesn’t matter.
Baud
Really odd that the GOP still thinks they can play the patriotism card.
Elizabelle
Oh dawg. It’s a specialized military term, now to be applied to the ammosexuals, keyboard/whiteboard commandos, and budding insurrectionists who slobber over this stuff.
If I were West Point, I would demand that Pompeo return the diploma. First in his class, and he is among the worst of them.
Martin
Can we just add ‘synonym: fascist’ to the end of that entry?
Baud
@Elizabelle: Oh man. Stolen valor.
Tom65
Marsellus Wallace has a *completely* different definition.
lowtechcyclist
@Baud:
This. They’ve been traitors so many different ways at this point, it’s hard to keep track of them all.
Old School
@Baud: No, the military term is two words. Pompeo’s is one.
Completely different.
lowtechcyclist
When I first saw this post title, I thought it was a reference to January 6th insurrectionists hitting cops with pipes.
Omnes Omnibus
@Tom65: I’ma call a coupla hard, pipe-hittin’ n*****s, who’ll go to work on the homes here with a pair of pliers and a blow torch. – Marcellus Wallace (Pulp Fiction)
David ? ☘The Establishment☘? Koch
Copywrite infringement</p>
Fuckers always steal
Ten Bears
White guy toking a crack (cocaine) pipe is the perfect illustration. Kudos
MisterForkbeard
@Elizabelle: Like all self-anointed conservative names, this one has some potential gay overtones. Not that there’s anything wrong with that.
ETA: Oh, I see. No, he’s trying to steal from the military. Nice.
Gravenstone
@Elizabelle: So they’re basically trying to institutionalize stolen valor. Remind us again, oh GOP bastards, how you’re all about “supporting the troops”…
dmsilev
Maybe he meant pipefitter? That’s an honorable profession which requires a fair amount of skill to do well. Wait, a Republican politician. Never mind then.
Omnes Omnibus
Urban dictionary has still another definition. I can also say that the military slang definition is one with which I am unfamiliar.
Amir Khalid
@lowtechcyclist:
Well, I wouldn’t say you got that wrong.
Betty Cracker
The mind. It reels.
Elizabelle
This mainly reminds me that we all have a lot of work to do, ferreting out the far right wingers burrowed into the military and law enforcement. I say “we”, because we need to keep on the pressure to make it happen.
I suspect there’s already a lot of interest in that subject, among those investigating January 6th. (Incidentally, Dana Rohrabacher just admitted he was there protesting too.)
Germany is probably ahead of us in reviewing its military and police structures. Since they took the Nazi era seriously, whereas we have a lot of conservadumbs who don’t even want to teach honestly about slavery, the Civil War, Reconstruction, etc. They’re having a public fit about it.
From June 10th NY Times:
Elite German Police Unit Disbanded Over Far-Right Group Chat
The move against the unit in Frankfurt is the latest by German authorities to clamp down on a rise in far-right networks in several state security units and in the military.
mrmoshpotato
@Elizabelle:
Totally. What is this shit?
Elizabelle
A Pompeo tweet from February 27.
Elizabelle
@mrmoshpotato: Keep grinding!
Steve in the ATL
@dmsilev: lots of pipefitters are union, so that won’t work for them!
Delk
More like buffet hitter.
IbnBob
@piratedan: Remember Hitchhikers’ Guide: the Republican Party is the party of telephone sanitisers in Ark B.
Elizabelle
Somebody named Jason Diamond on twitter is having fun:
zhena gogolia
@Delk:
Win.
featheredsprite
definition from urban dictionary:
The people who smoke crack and can therefore accomplish a difficult/dangerous/disturbing things because they only care about their next high.
Berserkers.
SiubhanDuinne
More fun: Did y’all see about Ivory Hecker, that imbecilic weather girl for some local Fox outlet who instead of reporting on the heat wave instead started ranting about how Fox was censoring her, so she and her pals at … wait for it … PROJECT VERITAS would be putting an end to this suppression. Wonkette has the details, along with video of the weather report gone pear-shaped.
https://www.wonkette.com/texas-weather-idiot-needs
Yes, she was suspended immediately.
SiubhanDuinne
@opiejeanne:
O/T but I addressed your question about Judge Jackson’s and Paul Ryan’s relationship in the morning thread, but the thread was dead by then.
PST
@Omnes Omnibus: Maynard and Zed were clearly proto-MAGAts, just the kind who would’ve fallen in line for TFG had they lived long enough.
Elizabelle
@featheredsprite: Yeah. That sounds like the Pulp Fiction definition. Which has been around now for a generation. At least.
Elizabelle
@SiubhanDuinne:
I love Wonkette’s headline. Goat-boned? Another WTF, but kind of understandable. Poor goats.
Maybe we could substitute “goat-boner” every time we see or hear anything of the deplorable Mike Pompeo.
Enhanced Voting Techniques
“Pipe hitter” is what they are calling over 60 stoners these days?
Tim in SF
Graham doesn’t smoke pipes. Graham only smokes leather cigars.
SiubhanDuinne
@opiejeanne:
@SiubhanDuinne:
Here.
No, except in a casual and inaccurate sense. I expect the family connection is that Judge Jackson’s BIL (her husband’s twin) is married to Ryan’s sister.
The English language doesn’t distinguish between “spouse’s sibling” and “sibling’s spouse.” And it should.
M31
pretty sure ‘pipe’ is pronounced “peepee” so Trump is all in
Josie
Do you suppose Pompeo has no idea how repulsive he actually is? That’s kind of sad.
UncleEbeneezer
Sounds kinky.
Mike in NC
Somebody tell Pompeo that we already tried a fat loudmouth in a baggy suit, and didn’t like the look.
M31
@Josie: I mean, Trump thinks he’s svelt and intelligent, Gaetz thinks that he’s a teen hearthrob, etc.
Ksmiami
@David ? ☘The Establishment☘? Koch: it’s not like they understand Pulp Fiction anyway-well or any type of fiction except for the lies in their own heads… Republicans are a disease
Martin
I think this requires the other statement by Pompeo that the GOP ‘crush Democrats, ride to the sound of the guns’.
This is just a call to violent uprising. The people that understand ‘pipe hitter’ heard what needed to be heard.
Dog whistle successfully delivered.
Ken
@Josie: It might be sad if it weren’t Pompeo.
Josie
@M31: Yes, a number of Republican men are quite deluded in that way.
Lacuna Synecdoche
Mike Pompeo via mistermix@ Top:
What the fuck is he smoking?
(Can’t believe it’s over 40 comments in before someone (me) was stupid enough to make the most obvious joke.)
Nora Lenderbee
@dmsilev:
There’s a joke about Joe the Plumber somewhere in here …
MisterForkbeard
@SiubhanDuinne: I heard about this. What was she actually talking about being ‘suppressed’?
My guess it was some ‘news’ about COVID.
Lacuna Synecdoche
@dmsilev:
You’d think Republicans would know better than to try to associate themselves with plumbing terms. It’s just begging for Nixon comparisons.
waspuppet
@Elizabelle: Oh cool so there’s open incitement of violence that’s cool I’m sure nothing really bad will come of this I mean after it’s not like Pompeo is Black or anything.
PJ
@Elizabelle: Since the late ’80s, when crack was at its height. (Just a reminder that Marion Barry was, in fact, set up.)
Stuart Frasier
@Elizabelle: Is this Pompeo’s way of telling us he’s on Grindr?
Elizabelle
@PJ: I am from the DC area. I remember when Marion Barry was a good guy. Before descending into parody.
Man had a Master’s in Organic Chemistry, too.
lgerard
Should probably merge the pipehitters with the “Meth…..We’re on it!” campaign for maximum effect
gene108
What gets me about conservative rhetoric is the “never apologize”, “never give an inch”, etc. rhetoric.
It’s like these fuckers never went to kindergarten, or were ever taught to share.
SiubhanDuinne
@MisterForkbeard:
Dunno. The Daily Beast just posted this a few minutes ago:
But I haven’t found anything that spells out what she claims she’s being censored for.
Oh, and her suspension, unsurprisingly, is now a full-blown firing. Good. Not even going to waste a tot or a pear on her.
Enhanced Voting Techniques
Damn, how white do you have to be to think being a crack head is anything but pathetic?
Amir Khalid
@SiubhanDuinne:
I commend to your attention the Malay word biras: the spouse of your spouse’s sibling. E.g. Judge Jackson’s biras is Paul Ryan’s sister.
trollhattan
Do remember that in his mind[sic] Mike Pompeo is the leading Republican candidate for president in 2024 and if it comes down to him or DeSantos I’m
doublingtripling my ale intake and stocking up on wingnut repellent spray.LongHairedWeirdo
How about
MORON:
Someone who unapologetically believes Trump is a wise, powerful man whose first concern is the American people, especially the workers and farmers.
comrade scotts agenda of rage
@piratedan:
Your way sounds far more humanitarian than mine. I simply want to load them onto any spaceship and launch them directly into the Sun.
Warblewarble
Auto correct to Bullshitter
Spanky
@gene108:
They did go to Kindergarten and were taught to share, but somewhere along the line they concluded that that was a sucker’s game and they were too cool for that loser stuff.
And that’s how they became uncool losers. The end.
Jim, Foolish Literalist
@Ken:
When they make the movie about the latter years of the trump administration, I am all for George Costanza playing Mike Pompeo.
West of the Rockies
Pompeo should name himself Taserface.
Spanky
@comrade scotts agenda of rage: I’d be happy just to supply them with about 3 minutes of fuel for launch. Enough to get fairly far downrange over the Atlantic.
West of the Rockies
@trollhattan: Piggy Pompeo is cool the same way principal Ed Rooney thought he was cool to the high school students he oversaw.
natem
These people are so fucking cringe
Matt McIrvin
@Amir Khalid: That is a useful word.
debbie
@gene108:
Or they’ve never come out from behind their mother’s skirts.
JCJ
@West of the Rockies: Excellent. I can hear Rocket laughing right now.
Ramalama
@Amir Khalid: I tried doing a double lutz google translate, thinking that there might be a French term, but Google doesn’t translate that well, I guess mechanical translations no matter which robot’s doing it is sub par. I would ask my spouse, but she confuses cousin and sister all of the time (in English).
SiubhanDuinne
@Amir Khalid:
What a very useful word. Thank you.
It’s not the same relationship under discussion, nor the same language, but I’m reminded of this favourite snippet from Josephine Tey’s Miss Pym Disposes:
?BillinGlendaleCA
@Elizabelle:
O-Chem would drive anyone to drugs.
Benw
@West of the Rockies: you’re killing it in this thread – here’s a spiffy car for you to take a day trip into the big city!
Booger
@Elizabelle: Mayor-for-life was also a dissertation away from a Ph.D in OC, if I recall correctly.
I miss him.
Gin & Tonic
@Elizabelle:
Boy, the jokes just write themselves, don’t they?
Mingobat (f/k/a Karen in GA)
@SiubhanDuinne: Why do I feel like her name would be Heller if not for a pinched god-bothering ancestor being offended by his own name?
And I think she just got fired. Oh well. I’m sure she’ll find another gig quickly, what with her going off script and bragging that she recorded her co-workers and all.
Anyway, I’m betting her “suppressed” info is something Q related.
Gravenstone
In his mind, maybe. I mean yeah, he’s trying really, really hard to make that reality, but even his home state of Kansas rejected him. No way he goes nationwide.
Frank Wilhoit
@Spanky: Escape velocity or GTFO.
Elizabelle
Vanity Fair. Maybe the pipehitters can buy it.
SAD!: DONALD TRUMP MIGHT HAVE TO SELF-PUBLISH HIS PRESIDENTIAL MEMOIR
The former president claims he’s turning down publishers for his new book left and right. But sources at all Big Five houses say they wouldn’t touch the project with a 117-foot pole.
Among other issues, publishing houses are concerned their staff might protest, or walk out the door. Also, fact-checking would be a nightmare.
Love how Vanity Fair continued with the digs:
Elizabelle
In moderation. Vanity Fair item that might have too many links. (Trump’s “memoirs” cannot find a reputable publisher.)
Gravenstone
@?BillinGlendaleCA: Early 80s and a friend of mine was initially assigned to the “jock” dorm as a freshman. When they found out that he planned to major in chemistry, he was inundated with requests to make “acid”. Needless to say, he found refuge in a less brain damaged dorm sometime soon after.
SiubhanDuinne
@Mingobat (f/k/a Karen in GA):
Yeah, she did get fired. I’ll bet she was a joy to have as a cow orker. Can’t imagine many of her colleagues are too upset.
Elizabelle
@Booger: And, Marion Barry got shot by Hanafi Muslims in 1977 during their siege of several DC government buildings. It was a flesh wound, but I remember being worried about him when I heard.
The Hanafi Muslims were a Black Muslims sect that was feuding with the Nation of Islam. They were not of the flying airplanes into buildings takeover types.
?BillinGlendaleCA
@Elizabelle: Heh.
Elizabelle
@SiubhanDuinne:
That is as good as a goat-boner! Yea, Subaru D!
SiubhanDuinne
I wonder how Raven is doing?
Jim, Foolish Literalist
@Elizabelle: give Bertelsmann a week, they’ll grow a new tentacle to wrap around that money
SiubhanDuinne
@Elizabelle:
Not original, I fear, but thank you. It comes in handy now and then!
ETA: And yes, I’m with you, I love “goat-boner”!
JoyceH
@Gravenstone:
I can never get over how some of these guys have spent a career in the political arena and apparently have never had a consultant let them in on the fact that they have zero charisma.
Mike Pence is another one. Whenever I see clips of his speeches and he’s obviously trying to be Dynamic and Soaring, I just wince and go, ‘please don’t do that’.
MattF
This is the truly weird thing– Pompeo really sees himself as a leading candidate for 2024. There’s a lot of delusional thinking out there.
Sturgeonmouth
This far in and the jackals aren’t in a frenzy to volunteer to hit Mike in the pipe? Sign me up!
Gin & Tonic
@JoyceH: If you’re a consultant who tells your client that they have zero charisma you don’t get a lot of repeat business, I bet.
Elizabelle
OK, a lot of the joy of the Vanity Fair item was its headline and first paragraph.
SAD!: DONALD TRUMP MIGHT HAVE TO SELF-PUBLISH HIS PRESIDENTIAL MEMOIR
The former president claims he’s turning down publishers for his new book left and right. But sources at all Big Five houses say they wouldn’t touch the project with a 117-foot pole.
Among other issues: fear of a staff walkout or massive protest. Also: fact-checking! Where to begin??
MattF
@Elizabelle: I suppose psychopathic lying could be seen as a genre.
Elizabelle
@MattF: Alas. It’s already a political party, so why not a publishing genre.
Ruckus
@Elizabelle:
Just saw the post and had similar thoughts, except that my mind runs far nearer the gutter. Like at least in it, if not lower.
Elizabelle
@Ruckus: Oooh. Do tell!!
trollhattan
Meanwhile, in New Hampshire, a kind of trifecta has been awarded:
Ladies and germs, your new Republican Party!
trollhattan
@Elizabelle:
Regnery awaits his call.
Elizabelle
@trollhattan: That’s too perfect. Banned from even entering Washington DC. At least while his case is pending.
Wish we could get a restraining order against Pompeo and his ilk, too.
Factoid: Dana Rohrabacher now lives in Maine.
misterpuff
I’m not a pipehitter. I’m a pipelayer.
Spanky
@trollhattan:
Edited for accuracy.
Frankensteinbeck
@Baud:
If you take it for granted that only white people are American, Republicans are patriots. All the insurrection, Russia, secession talk, and Confederate flags is patriotism from that perspective. They are rebelling against a takeover of America by non-Americans. As such, they will describe themselves as the only true patriots forever, and care about who is and isn’t patriotic far more than we do.
SiubhanDuinne
Spanky
@misterpuff: Ah! Another Marion Barry quote.
MisterForkbeard
@Elizabelle: Honestly, I’d just release the book as-written with an extra 100 pages of fact-checking and debunking attached to the end.
Market it as the “Donald Lies About The Presidency, Vol 1.”
Cheryl Rofer
Spanky
@SiubhanDuinne: Couldn’t they at least nominate a pilot that can find a runway?
//
trollhattan
@SiubhanDuinne:
“ambassador to the Council of the International Civil Aviation Organization.”
That’s a thing? Who knew? Anyway, fine choice and I’m sure Sully will represent us well, unlike whatever golf accessory Trump put in the job.
trollhattan
@Spanky:
Hey-ooh! {rimshot}
Ruckus
@SiubhanDuinne:
A cow orker? Is that anything like a pigf ucker
Elizabelle
@Cheryl Rofer: OMG.
Pipehitter also refers to a foundation (!!) established by Eddie Gallagher, conduct unbecoming SEAL pardoned by TFG? (Who was outed by his fellow SEALs, right??)
That’s deplorable, but that’s their brand, is it not?
Again, we need a good hard look at what is in our military and law enforcement.
Ruckus
@MattF:
Delusional – republican, gee I can never remember which is which.
SiubhanDuinne
@Spanky:
LOL
Gin & Tonic
@trollhattan: New Hampshire legislature has like 3,000 members or something. It’s insane, but you can get elected with only a couple of thousand votes.
Hoodie
@Elizabelle: No doubt that the special ops guys took it from that pulp fiction dialogue. As usual, these dorks don’t understand the etiology .
debbie
@Elizabelle:
Wow, not even Regnery? I’m genuinely surprised.
?BillinGlendaleCA
@Ruckus: Doesn’t that depend on what your cow orker’s are like? I’ve worked with some that are pigf ukers.
Subsole
@Elizabelle: Most military folks I know would have a real problem with these people calling themselves pipehitters without being in an actual pipehitter unit. Or any unit, really.
Elizabelle
@Subsole: Yep.
I guess Coal Rollers didn’t quite have the cache.
Enhanced Voting Techniques
@Cheryl Rofer: Meh, so the Conservative version of Weebroism.
West of the Rockies
@JoyceH: Spot on! Pence always, always looks like a disappointed church deacon. And Pompeo is somehow utterly ignorant as for how wildly disagreeable he is.
dopey-o
Sully won’t get you killed.
Unlike TFG, who is America’s Greatest Serial Killer.
Steeplejack (phone)
More accurate “pipehitter” image.
jimmiraybob
I call dibs on “The 1st Patriot Pipe Hitter Militia of Missouri.”
Just trying to get the drop on Greitens and/or Hawley.
Booger
@Elizabelle: The District Building, B’nai B’rith and the Islamic Center. One reporter was killed in the siege.
karen marie
@piratedan: I vote for “straight into the sun.”
Just Chuck
@Subsole: Most military folks where I live (Colorado Springs) would vote for these valor-stealing chickenhawks and criminals anyway. I don’t think my town is unique there.
Elizabelle
@Steeplejack (phone): Yep. And it is more dangerous than meth and crack put together.
It steals your loved ones, not just your stereo and other easily portable stuff.
Just Chuck
“Pipehitter Pompeo” has a nice ring to it. I suggest that be his name from now on.
karen marie
@gene108: Greitens is running for Missouri governor again while Franken is still banished to the wilderness. Infuriating.
AWJ
It’s not like there isn’t precedent here. The popular chud-American term of approval “based” apparently etymologically derives from “free base”–in other words, someone who was “based” originally meant that they were under the influence of crack.
YasukeSama
@Tom65: Thanks for this. I was also thinking of Tyrone Biggams and a giveaway that starts around 5 o’clock.
Amir Khalid
@trollhattan:
I suppose Regnery might be willing to publish TFG’s book, if he paid them up front. And found someone to underwrite bulk sales to RW groups.
Keith P.
@Elizabelle: Option B was “pole smoker”
Ken
I checked google, and he did place fourth in the CPAC straw poll in February.
Now if you’ll excuse me, I have to clear my browser history lest I be plagued by targeted ads from every Q-adjacent scam out there.
Elizabelle
@Keith P.: LOL. That was fun to look up. Indeed.
Matt
“Pipehitter” is also Bibi’s nickname for Pompeo.
Can’t wait for the MyPillow-branded crack pipes!
ian
@SiubhanDuinne:
That took way too long to figure out.
ian
@Elizabelle:
The list of people right there who must have had vital, incriminating shit on the Orange menace and decided to save it for a tell all afterwards books makes me furious with rage.