Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

I like you, you’re my kind of trouble.

They were going to turn on one another at some point. It was inevitable.

Republicans want to make it harder to vote and easier for them to cheat.

An unpunished coup is a training exercise.

Take your GOP plan out of the witness protection program.

“The defense has a certain level of trust in defendant that the government does not.”

Stop using mental illness to avoid talking about armed white supremacy.

Somebody needs to explain to DeSantis that nobody needs to do anything to make him look bad.

I was confident that someone would point it out and thought why not me.

We’ve had enough carrots to last a lifetime. break out the sticks.

Michigan is a great lesson for Dems everywhere: when you have power…use it!

Black Jesus loves a paper trail.

A thin legal pretext to veneer over their personal religious and political desires

The truth is, these are not very bright guys, and things got out of hand.

I conferred with the team and they all agree – still not tired of winning!

Republicans: slavery is when you own me. freedom is when I own you.

Fuck these fucking interesting times.

White supremacy is terrorism.

It’s time for the GOP to dust off that post-2012 autopsy, completely ignore it, and light the party on fire again.

I see no possible difficulties whatsoever with this fool-proof plan.

Wow, you are pre-disappointed. How surprising.

Jesus, Mary, & Joseph how is that election even close?

Speaking of republicans, is there a way for a political party to declare intellectual bankruptcy?

My years-long effort to drive family and friends away has really paid off this year.

You are here: Home / Sports / Euro 2020 Football (Soccer) / Euro 2020 Quarter Finals: Ukraine v England

Euro 2020 Quarter Finals: Ukraine v England

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Playing in Rome, with England favored. I guess that this, if any, match will attract some attention from you guys…

After this, play resumes with semi-finals next Tuesday. Bad timing for American watchers!

Reader Interactions

80Comments

  5. 5.

    Steeplejack

    I’ve been saving this.

    So it’s England v Ukraine. One is deeply divided between ultra-nationalists and people who want to join the EU, with dodgy Russian money funding its rightwing politicians. But Ukraine has its problems too.

    — David__Osland (@David__Osland) June 30, 2021

  10. 10.

    PsiFighter37

    I wish the numbnuts who voted for Brexit would think about why their team gets to play in European football leagues.

    Go Ukraine. I do feel bad for England having a lot of suffering at the national level, and Gareth Southgate seems like he’s done a great job with his squad, but I just loathe the English. Insufferable group of people who are going to consign their country to the dustbin of history as quick as possible.

  12. 12.

    billcinsd

    Harry Kane with the goal off the through ball. It turns out putting in some of your better wingers can lead to goals.

  16. 16.

    SiubhanDuinne

    @eclare:

    @Gin & Tonic:

    God Save the Queen

    Is she playing?

    You know, I think she could! I saw some photos of her taken in the last couple of days at the Windsor Horse Show. She drove herself on at least one of those days. Casually dressed, smiling ear to ear, completely laid back. I think if she wanted to kick a football around, she could go up against Ukraine with the best of them.

  17. 17.

    SiubhanDuinne

    Idle query: If I felt like watching this game, where might I do so? I don’t want to subscribe to anything.

  18. 18.

    HumboldtBlue

    After this, play resumes with semi-finals next Tuesday. Bad timing for American watchers!

    Not if you don’t have a fucking job!

  24. 24.

    Another Scott

    Yay Sportsball!!  :-)

    ObOpenThread:

    This is hilarious. 10,000 people here and the ‘Team Marco’ booth can’t get ONE SINGLE PERSON to stop and talk to them. I’ve watched 500 people walk right by them in 15 minutes. pic.twitter.com/NovEGZU6Zb

    — Ron Filipkowski (@RonFilipkowski) July 3, 2021

    I'll say it again: nobody likes him. Nobody. His constituent service is in the toilet. He's closed offices rather than deal with people. He is seen for the greedy, lazy, stupid wad of gum he is. But he massages South Florida and Big Sugar. That's almost enough.

    — Richard M. Nixon (@dick_nixon) July 3, 2021

    Go Val!!

    Cheers,
    Scott.

  28. 28.

    Morzer

    Just my opinion, but if England believe that sitting back and just defending for the next 45 minutes will be good enough, I think they are very rapidly going to enter a world of pain.

  29. 29.

    Sloane Ranger

    Half time and we’re still ahead but Ukraine beginning to look better after substitution and change of formation.

    Keep it up England!

  32. 32.

    Tony Jay

    @Morzer:

    I think the plan is to stay solid, work up the field down the flanks and get behind the Ukrainians as they have already, and when the Ukrainians have to come out in numbers later on hit them hard on the break with our pace.

    It might be dull, but…..

    Or do that!

    Slabhead slams it home! 2-0

  36. 36.

    HumboldtBlue

    What a ball, that cross was inch-perfect. That headed goal adds to the already record total of headed goals at a Euros in history.

  37. 37.

    billcinsd

    Kane with a second. 3-0. So does this mean England won’t score in the semis, as they used up all there goals today?

  38. 38.

    Tony Jay

    Could all of our crappest players stop bloody scoring?!?!

    3-0 I think that will be that.

  45. 45.

    Amir Khalid

    I reckon this quarterfinal is done and dusted. I don’t see Ukraine coming back from three goals down to win this. England has more players named Harry than they can deal with.

  46. 46.

    Morzer

    As I was saying, obviously the plan is to strike early and often. This game looks pretty much done, although there’s some interest in whether England can keep another clean sheet. Time for a good, long walk. Sympathies to Ukraine. You are a much-improved team with much to be proud of.

  47. 47.

    Morzer

    Looks like the semi-finals are going to be pretty spicy. Italy v. England seems the likeliest final, but I wouldn’t be totally surprised to see Denmark turn England over.

  50. 50.

    HumboldtBlue

    Now we get 30 minutes of England passing the ball between themselves with the odd Harry Kane serious chance.​ 
    The CAPTAIN!

  58. 58.

    Tom Levenson

    @Tom Levenson:  By which I mean–I loathe all the Union Jackassery associated with rooting for the national team. I have many family members for whom this is truly a happy day, and I’m happy for them.

  59. 59.

    Morzer

    @Tom Levenson: 

    To be fair, many England fans are embarrassed by the minority of racist hooligans who use the England team to express their loathsome personalities.

  60. 60.

    Mary G

    I’m sorry to see such a bad beatdown. TFG and all the people who testified against his extortion and talked about how great Ukraine is has me rooting for the underdog, but nine goals is pretty much pony and unicorn country, isn’t it?

  63. 63.

    Morzer

    I feel bad for Ukraine. They’ve been outplayed tonight, despite a period when they seemed to be getting back into the game. I don’t think they deserved a 4-0 beatdown. Here’s hoping that they come back stronger in the future.

  64. 64.

    Sloane Ranger

    So, Denmark on Wednesday. I have never had such a stress free time watching an England game as this evening. Pouring a whisky and soda as I type.

  65. 65.

    Gin & Tonic

    Well, congratulations, England. There was a while when I thought we could make a game of it, but you were clearly superior tonight.

  68. 68.

    HumboldtBlue

    @Gin & Tonic: ​ 
    Your parents are from Ukraine, correct?

    England have kept five straight clean sheets, never been done in the Euros before.

  72. 72.

    HumboldtBlue

    Harry McGuire has a head like a cinder block. And he looks like a lost member of Mumford and Sons.

  74. 74.

    burnspbesq

    If you want to nitpick, Pickford’s distribution was not up to his usual standard. But that’s about it.

  75. 75.

    SiubhanDuinne

    @Morzer:

    In 2007, I was on a train returning to London from Cambridge, where I’d spent the day. The train was crammed to the gills with football fans immediately following a game between something like Chelsea and Man U. Whatever the teams were, the lads on my train were exuberant to the point of being seriously dangerous. I was genuininely concerned for my physical safety.

  76. 76.

    Robert Sneddon

    @SiubhanDuinne: ​  I was on a tram in Edinburgh just after the Scotland rugby team had beaten England in the Calcutta cup competition a few years ago. The tram was packed and rocking from side to side on its wheels as the exuberant supporters celebrated, so much so the tram driver had to stop and put out an announcement to tell people to stop pushing and making the tram unstable.​
     
    Alcohol may have been involved.

  79. 79.

    JML

    I can’t decide if Gareth Southgate knows exactly what he’s doing or is the luckiest manager of all time. (Probably somewhere in the middle, right? probably a pretty good manager overall who’s catching every break right now)

    I thought England actually looked pretty “meh” in the first half, rarely attacking with any purpose and just dinking around with the ball, absent the lovely goal from ENGLAND’S HARRY KANE and a couple of other runs at the goal. Then it was a complete dismantling in the second half where they couldn’t miss. (anyone who can’t hit Slabhead on a cross shouldn’t play at the professional level, of course)

    They should be able to beat Denmark and make it to the final, but I’m not sure I like a matchup against Spain; Italy is playing really well right now, but their style would be a better match for England. (and frankly would be more interesting overall. I’m sick of Spain’s “200 passes with no meaning” style)

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