I bought a Weber grill this week. I got the charcoal Weber, not gas, with the thermometer and a little side table. I ordered one of the chimney things for lighting charcoal without lighter fluid or any chemicals. Wow, those things have come a long way since the little slow-lighting one my -ex had all those years ago.
We christened the new grill with hamburgers last night. We thought about doing reverse sear filets, but we figured we should start with something that wasn’t time-sensitive since the grill had to be assembled.
Why do even hamburgers taste 100x better on a charcoal grill than they do otherwise? Burgers fried in a pan are boring and kind of disgusting.
Even the leftover hamburger for lunch – topped with cheddar, salsa avocado, and fresh tomatoes from the garden was really great. Burgers last night were topped with roasted onions and spicy red peppers fro my garden. Yum. My friend added Melinda’s jalapeño ketchup to his.
We haven’t had condiment wars for awhile. What’s your perfect burger?
Totally open thread.
OzarkHillbilly
The one I’m eating.
WaterGirl
@OzarkHillbilly: I used to know a guy who would say “you know, even the worst sex I ever had was still pretty good.”
Sounds like maybe that’s how you feel about burgers
edit: Ozark, that is no way to start an argument!
raven
Can you hear the stadium crowd??? Go Illini!!!
WaterGirl
@raven: I do not hear it. But then it’s a million degrees out and I am inside in the air conditioning.
I assume we are winning? The crowd is never that loud when it’s just whining and complaining.
Ken
Yes it is.
There, now that we’ve got the Monty Python reference out of the way; I like grilled onions and mushrooms on my burger, with a slice of melted Swiss and a little mustard.
Steve from Mendocino
I urge you to get mesquite charcoal and find someone who has oak firewood. Beg a clear chunk and use a hand axe to cut a 1 inch by 1 inch sliver of oak. Get the mesquite going in a chimney, dump it in one corner of the weber and put the oak on top of it and cover. Give it 5 minutes to get some of the nastiness out of the oak and then put the burgers on the opposite side from the fire and cook covered, flip and finish. Top vent should be above the bergers to draw the smoke from the fire over them. As for garnish, I generally make my own sauces, but Tobasco brand has a chipotle sauce that is quite good. My two cents.
raven
@WaterGirl: It’s almost as hot there as it is here. One minute to go!!!
OzarkHillbilly
That sound you hear is the exploding of Evangelical heads.
WaterGirl
@Steve from Mendocino: one inch by one inch is very small. That’s all it takes? Amazing.
Xavier
Those charcoal starter chimneys are the best! Quick and no lighter fluid smell.
OzarkHillbilly
@WaterGirl: A buddy of mine likes to say, “There are 3 kinds of beer: Cold beer, warm beer, and free beer. My favorite is free beer.”
Anoniminous
Soy patty boiled in water served between two rice crackers with alfalfa sprouts slathered in mung bean paste.
For the discerning gourmet.
WaterGirl
@Xavier: I was shocked by how easy that was! Put the paper under the chimney, add the charcoal, and use the little holes at the bottom of the chimney to light the paper in several places.
The one we had years ago required an amazing amount of coaxing, and patience, and a lot of time. This was amazing.
raven
Oskee-wow-wow!!!
cope
Smash burgers in casa cope. I divide one pound of 80/20 ground round into eight burger balls. I heat the grill plate on the gas grill and begin cooking. Each ball of meat sits on the grill sizzling away for about thirty seconds and then I smash them out with the back of a spatula. They cook until brown on the edges and a bit “bloody” on top. That’s when they get flipped, blanketed with the cheese of choice and closed under the grill top for a couple of minutes until the cheese melts. Buns of choice around here include slider buns (Hawaiian or potato) or a slice of seeded rye bread cut in half to slider smash burger size. For me, a bit of catsup and sometimes onion, usually raw.
Done.
WaterGirl
Panera sells brioche bun-shaped, well, buns. I was going to make some from scratch, but my friend suggested those. Those didn’t get soggy like regular hamburger buns do, so I was really pleased with how it went. First time since March 2020 that I have eaten a bread product that I didn’t make myself.
I did the Panera order on-line with curbside pickup thing. They are only 5 minutes away, so the was pretty painless.
raven
I’ve had a Weber Q gas grill for years and I love it. I don’t eat beef or pork but it rocks!
jeffreyw
What Have The Romans Ever Done for Us?
I’ve had that very Weber grill for a decade now and cooked many a fantastic meal on it. I like a nice sharp cheddar (Cabot seriously sharp is what we usually use) plus lettuce tomato onions hot sauce or jalapeno and a nice spicey brown mustard. Sometimes I’ll add pickles too.
I remember reading an Interview on how to make burgers with a supposed expert celebrity chef and he said never to grill them because they’re better cooked in their own fat. That tells you what the fuck celebrity chefs know about making delicious burgers, which is apparently hardly anything because they do indeed get great flavor from cooking over charcoal or wood, or both.
Phylllis
@WaterGirl: Spritz the paper with cooking spray. Learned that from Cooks Country, I think.
Geeno
Diced onions and garlic mixed into the meat, sriracha mustard (basically brown mustard mixed with some sriracha) and perhaps baby spinach on top, all rosemary olive oil roll.
WaterGirl
@cope: I had the choice of regular size or slider-size brioche buns at Panera, and I went with regular. I may have to try slider-sized next time.
I sliced the bun in half and toasted it in the toaster oven – and let the cheese melt on the bun rather than dripping off the burger and into the grate. That worked really well.
For the burgers I used a tiny bit of salt, a lot of good Penzey’s black pepper, and a splash of worcestershire sauce. I don’t think I even used any garlic salt.
Jager
When portable grills began to show up in the 50s, my old man bought one for our lake place. He couldn’t get the charcoal going to save his ass. One day out of frustration he doused the charcoal with boat gas (oil and gas mixed) he only did it once.
Mike in NC
Bought a new Weber grill when we moved here and it’s still going strong 12 years later. This model has a propane tank starter to fire up the charcoal, which are ready to cook with in 15 minutes.
J R in WV
We use hardwood charcoal, and add local hardwood on top. I start all my fires with a propane torch, no fluid no fuss, just the torch on the charcoal. Same for firewood in the wood stove when it’s cold out. Seasoned oak and ash, 30 or 40 seconds with the torch where the draft will put incoming air on the burning wood.
Burgers, grilled, with sweet onions, hearty mustard or real mayo, garlic and steak sauce in the burger before it’s pressed into patties. I like tomatoes with, but on the side because they’re so juicy this time of year. Fresh corn with butter for a side.
Last night we had thick cut hardwood smoked bacon, lettuce and tomato sandwiches for dinner, really good on crusty bakery bread. Great tomatoes this summer!
James E Powell
@jeffreyw:
You are a treasure
WaterGirl
@jeffreyw: Those look really good.
debbie
English muffins aren’t as good as they used to be, but I liked a burger (as rare as was allowed) on an English muffin with mayonnaise. Hellman’s, of course.
James E Powell
@Jager:
I had a friend did something like that with white gas and created a catastrophe. I’m sure his kids tell his grandchildren the story.
WaterGirl
@Phylllis: Yeah, on amazon someone said to dip the paper in oil before you light it. I figured I would try ti without oil first, and it started right up. But I will keep a little bit of oil in mind in the future.
debbie
@Jager:
?
Steve from Mendocino
@WaterGirl: One inch by one inch by the length of the log, typically about 16 inches long in a cord.
jeffreyw
WaterGirlA man goes to the lumber yard and asks to buy a 2×4 . How long do you want that he was asked? Oh, quite a while, I’m building a shed.
WaterGirl
@Steve from Mendocino: Oh, duh. I was picturing a little one-inch square, maybe like the size of a big set of dice. (but only one)
WaterGirl
@jeffreyw: I laughed out loud. My dad would have LOVED that joke.
Mrearl
@OzarkHillbilly: The way I heard it, down in the Arkansas, was: “The best beer is a free beer. After that, there’s no accountin’ for taste.”
germy
I really love barbecued seafood. Shrimp, salmon, etc. It all tastes better from a good smoky grill.
cleek
my ancient three burner gas grill finally rusted through early this summer. i’d had it for 15 years, maybe. and i always thought it was pretty good at doing what it needed to do. but this time i thought i’d try a Weber. i got a little Spirit 2, gas, no frills. but holy cats is that thing a million times better than the grill it replaced. comes up to searing temp in no time and most importantly – the valves don’t leak when they’re turned off. so if i accidentally forget to turn off the gas on the tank, it doesn’t all leak out overnight!
best burger: grilled, topped with arugula, bacon jam and smoked cheddar.
WaterGirl
@debbie: Let the mayonnaise miracle whip wars begin!
I don’t eat either one, so I just sit back and observe when the sparks fly.
WaterGirl
@cleek: I got kind of spooked by my old gas grill that leaked propane.
edit: it’s really nice to be seeing you here again lately.
WaterGirl
@cleek:
Elitist! I bet you have Barack Obama over for burgers, don’t you?
germy
Is this the future?
https://interestingengineering.com/scientists-reveal-worlds-first-3d-printed-marbled-wagyu-beef
Cheryl from Maryland
Bison burgers with Tarragon Butter. Soften a stick of butter and flatten it out on a piece of foil. Cover the butter with springs of fresh tarragon and a few drops of a good white wine vinegar. Roll the butter into a jelly roll, wrap up in the foil and put back in the fridge. When the butter is hard, time to cook! Have a ball of ground bison about 1/4 to 1/3 lb., slice a piece off the tarragon butter, push it into the middle of the ball, then flatten into a patty. Grill (I use a cast iron stove top grill pan). Top with sliced Guyere Cheese while still on the grill so cheese melts. Serve on brioche buns with Dijon mustard and arugula. If you wish, sauté sliced red onions in olive oil and finish with a splash of balsamic. Onions can be used to add to the toppings or as a side.
raven
@cleek: I’ve had mine so long I’ve replace the burner tubes and the cast iron grates!
WaterGirl
About to start a new season of Bosch tonight. I thought Season 4 was the best by far. Wasn’t all that crazy about Season 5, but it was decent enough. Someone here said seasons 6 and 7 are not as good as the earlier seasons, but I am very much rooting for that person to be wrong. :-)
germy
@Cheryl from Maryland:
Red onions make everything better.
Jim, Foolish Literalist
@germy: damn, I wonder if that could be a game-changer, climate-wise (though I’ll admit I still haven’t tried impossible meat)
this thread is making me very hungry
MoCaAce
Mix a packet of dry onion soup mix in two pounds of burger. Make the patties nice and thick and cook over a hot grill to medium. The soup mix has lots of salt so just use pepper when grilling. Melted pepper jack or sharp cheddar on top with some thin sliced inions and a fresh tomato slice. Ketchup for burgers… mustard is for dogs.
NeenerNeener
My Dad used to work for a restaurant that specialized in steak. Back in the late 70s they were supposed to have a party of Japanese businessmen who were in town to see the MacIntosh audio equipment factory, and they got extra prime rib in for the reservation. Reservation was canceled (I don’t remember why) and the restaurant had the prime rib ground up into hamburger for the staff. Those burgers were awesome.
I prefer cheddar on my burgers.
I was watching some show on Hulu or Netflix and a number of plots revolved around the guy buying a Big Green Egg grill. It looked interesting but spendy.
Ceci n est pas mon nym
When we finished running through British Bake Offs during lockdown, we started tracking down spin-offs from other countries. One day on the Aussie show they were making “Aussie Burgers With The Lot” on some thin excuse. The buns were made from scratch I suppose.
Anyway, when it was over, my lovely wife announced that we had all those things in our pantry and Burgers With The Lot were for dinner. God I love that woman!
Where were we? Oh yes, burger toppings. If I can’t have the lot and I’m going more minimalist, the perfect burger has mushrooms, fresh tomato, raw onion, and perhaps a sharp provolone, but I’m not super picky about cheese other than it has to be real cheese. Plus a little barbecue and a touch of sriracha.
Justin W
@debbie: Do you have Bay’s English muffins in the refrigerated section where you are? They’re the only kind I buy anymore. The best you can buy in the regular grocery store these days.
Gin & Tonic
@Steve from Mendocino: Thanks to the gypsy moths, I have more oak firewood than you can shake a stick at (heh.)
Lapassionara
@WaterGirl: We enjoyed all seasons of Bosch. I think you will continue to like it.
and boo, hiss Miracle Whip
Phylllis
@WaterGirl: Miracle Whip is not mayonnaise. I question whether it’s actually food.
1. Dukes; 2. Blue Plate in a pinch; 3. There is no three.
WaterGirl
@Ceci n est pas mon nym: I am virtually certain that I remember that story from when you first told it during lockdown. Am I crazy? It’s a really nice story, so I’m not complaining
I believe you had a similar testimony about your love for your wife for making that happen after you watched the show.
CaseyL
I’ll eat a burger without the char, but a burger with the char is in its own dimension of Deliciousness.
I think the best burger I ever had was the best by virtue of its context, rather than the burger itself.
Back in 2000, I went on a 10-day road trip with the UW Department of Geology. One of the best trips ever, and if UW still offered them I’d do it again without hesitation. Washington to Alberta and back again, culminating with a hike up to the Burgess Shale in Yoho National Park.
We lunched on sandwiches every day, picnic style, with makings carried in big bins from the buses.
Important to note: there were three buses. Elongated vans, really, each holding about 14 people, plus luggage and the food bins. Though seats weren’t assigned, we mostly rode the same buses that we started in.
Another important note: My bus had all the trouble-makers. Particularly a woman whose name I cannot remember. She was a firecracker, and we all adored her.
Not quite a week in, Firecracker got tired of sandwiches. She got tired of picnics. She wanted “real food” (i.e., something not cold) in a real place with waitservice. We were at the time in the wilds of Alberta, and I should further note that none of us were from Alberta or knew our way around there.
She essentially hijacked our bus, by telling the driver to head for the nearest town large enough to have a restaurant, a bar & grill, anything that served real food. The driver found a main road and followed it to a little town called Patricia. There was a taphouse, and we stopped there.
Terrific people there, and amazing food. And an enormous fireplace with an enormous table we could all sit at. BBQ, burgers, corn chowder, fries, pie for dessert… we stuffed ourselves to near-immobility for about $6.00 each.
It was the BEST EVER.
(And we caught up with the other two buses in a nearby park where they were eating the usual cold cut sandwiches for lunch. Hahahahahaha.)
Ceci n est pas mon nym
About lighting without lighter fluid, I’ve been doing that for years. It doesn’t really take any equipment.
It started many years ago when we were at a company picnic and realized that nobody had brought lighter fluid. I wondered if we could get a small wood fire going and whether that would do the trick. Having recently been camping I was reasonably confident in my ability to build a working wood fire.
It worked fantastically well, and I’ve been doing that ever since. You’re really only building a starter fire, not a full campfire, getting up to a couple twigs that are maybe 1/4-1/2″ in diameter max. Build your pyramid of charcoal around that and the wood fire will be plenty hot enough to start the coals.
Easy, safe and it adds a nice wood smoke flavor.
I also like to throw a couple of foil-wrapped ears of corn directly onto the coals. The moisture in the husks steams the corn and keeps it from burning. It’s a really wonderful flavor.
Jeffro
I don’t think there is a perfect way to dress a burger, but I am slowly coming around to the idea that a proper burger ought to include only the burger, cheese, sauce of some kind, and hot toppings only. No lettuce, tomato, or raw onion. And this is from a guy who used to basically bankrupt Roy Rogers with fixin’s from the Fixin’s Bar on every burger.
It’s just better that way.
Phylllis
@Justin W: Elaine Stritch was married to John Bay, the Bay’s heir, for nine years or so until his death. Apparently she gifted folks with Bay’s English muffins for years.
Jeffro
@jeffreyw: that’s kinda unreal (in a very good way) – thanks!
Ceci n est pas mon nym
@WaterGirl:
Yes I did tell that story before. You caught me.
Here’s one I haven’t told before. When our kids were very young, we were quite broke. There used to be a chain of Roy Rogers hamburger joints around Maryland, and they had a thing called a “Fixins Bar”. We’d get a couple of burgers and give everybody one side of a bun, which we would load up from the condiment bar to make a filling meal.
It used to make me wonder if the purpose of the patty was just to be a foundation for stacking condiments. I do appreciate a really good quality burger now, but I still wonder that from time to time.
Mike in NC
@Justin W: We switched from Thomas’s to Bay’s a long time ago and never looked back.
NotMax
Back in olden days we would make a charcoal grilling chimney out of an empty #10 can.
Remove bottom of can. Using the pointy end of a church key, make a circle of triangular holes around the rim of the bottom. Repeat to make holes around the top.
Voila.
cope
As for steaks, reverse sear is the way I do them if they’re at the very least an inch and half thick, preferably bone-in rib eyes (lagniappe for the dog). If they are that thin or thinner, I just stand at the grill cooking them by feel with minimum of moving them around.
Raised on Miracle Whip but came to like real mayonnaise a decade or so ago as my palate moved toward the savory end of the spectrum. I use it just for myself as mrs. cope is still team Miracle Whip.
debbie
@Justin W:
I’ll look next time, thanks.
Another Scott
What? No mention of a Bulkie roll??
I thought J was speaking a foreign language the first time I heard her mention it.
I’m not terribly picky about burgers. Krystal / White Castle sliders are fine at rare times.
Fresh ground beef and (a slight amount) of bacon is more yummy. After that, put it on any sort of bun, whole-wheat bread, etc., doesn’t much matter to me. Lettuce, tomato, and mustard, and we’re done.
Cheers,
Scott.
JMG
I use a charcoal burning Weber for everything from steaks to shrimp to cauliflower. Tonight it’ll be lamb chops. Have to keep them away from directly over the coals because the fat fires will scorch them. As for burgers, I prefer cheddar, sweet or red onion and some A-1 sauce. There is a local restaurant that serves a bacon and blue cheese burger on an English muffin that I also like.
Ceci n est pas mon nym
@OzarkHillbilly:
My first beer was at college keggers and I remember enjoying it.
But not too many years later when I had a chance to sample a cheap keg of beer at some party or other, I couldn’t believe I ever drank that stuff. I couldn’t handle more than a couple sips.
Citizen Alan
@Phylllis: I hated mayonnaise for years because I was raised to think it all tasted like miracles whip. I never tried the real stuff until I was in college. Now I would eat it straight out of the jar of a spoon.
Never tried Duke. I like blue pplate look like, but my preference is Hellnan ‘s.
Omnes Omnibus
It depends. Never Mayo or Miracle Whip. Not arguing. I don’t argue over facts.
cope
@CaseyL: The Burgess Shale…I am in awe. I’m guessing your group had to have permission to go to the quarry and weren’t allowed to collect any fossils, yes?
a thousand flouncing lurkers was fidelio
@CaseyL: Was it the Patricia Hotel?
James E Powell
@WaterGirl:
Duke’s has entered the chat.
NB – On the west coast, Hellman’s is Best Foods
CaseyL
@cope: Right on both counts. We had Rangers (plural) with our group, and they were authorized to look through our backpacks to make sure we hadn’t taken any.
The hike to the quarry is a regular offering, or at least was back then; you just have to sign up for it. It is a grueling trek, though. 14 miles RT with a 2500′ elevation gain. So very worth it, but I don’t think I could do that part again.
@a thousand flouncing lurkers was fidelio: OH MY GOD – Yes! That’s it!! Looking at the photos on TripAdvisor brings back *such* memories.
NotMax
@WaterGirl
After you’re done, you can move right on to Goliath (3 seasons, #4 arriving in late September, nearly two years after it was announced there would be a fourth and final season) and Patriot (2 seasons).
cleek
@WaterGirl: i don’t… but my brother might. http://ok-cleek.com/blogs/?p=31362
@raven: i replaced all the grates and drip pans. but when the legs finally rusted through, there’s was nothing i could do but haul it away – after softly playing Taps on my imaginary bugle.
What Have The Romans Ever Done for Us?
@NeenerNeener: Big Green Eggs are great but honestly the Weber kettle grill does 90% of everything just as well for a fraction of the price. Plus those Big Green Eggs have a somewhat small cooking surface. The deal breaker for me though is they weigh like 500 lbs…I thought jeez if I ever need to move this thing it’ll be a real pain.
Plus they’re ceramic so if you tipped it over while moving it it’s toast.
What Have The Romans Ever Done for Us?
@Geeno: For mixing into the meat I use Worcestershire sauce, diced onions and a little garlic, some season salt, and sometimes I crack an egg in there but not always.
Frank Wilhoit
Pan-fried burgers can be greatly improved by two things. (I assume you’re already making them thin, and peppering them, and using the highest heat that won’t smoke — as verified by actually setting off the smoke alarm once and then backing off a tad. The tolerable heat level varies with the fat content, but the game is to boil off the water as quickly as possible. That is the primary reason for the difference between pan and grill.)
First, put a tiny, tiny bit of ground cinnamon on them after the first flip. If you can taste it, you’ve used too much. Its purpose is to allow the fat-soluble flavors and the water-soluble flavors to blend. No, I don’t know how the chemistry works, but it does.
Then when you take them out of the pan, deglaze, with the absolute minimum of water — ideally only a few drops. If they’ve been cooked right, there should be plenty of goodness. Smear that on them before any other toppings.
Jay C
@Ceci n est pas mon nym:
A guy at an organic corn farm in the Berkshires once convinced me to try grilling corn without the foil: just trim the long tassels off one end, the stem off the other, soak the unhusked ear in water for 20 minutes or so, then just put on a hot grill, turning every so often to even out the char.
Worked fine: the husk gets dried out, so easy to shuck, and the corn picks up more of the “grill” taste. A little labor-intensive but worth it.
randy khan
The best burgers I’ve ever had on a regular basis were at a restaurant in D.C. called City Cafe, sadly closed for at least 25 years now. (For people who know D.C. restaurants, it was run by the same people as Restaurant Nora.) Big, fairly thick patty, cooked to medium, nice crusty roll that fit the burger. The toppings changed regularly, but always included nice cheese.
Currently, I’m a Shake Shack fan, although I know that a lot of what I like is the salt. I might like a slightly less squishy bun.
For toppings, it varies by mood, but cheddar or blue cheese generally works for me. I have been known to have pepper jack. A slice of by-God real tomato, some caramelized onions, pickles, ketchup. I don’t usually have lettuce. Also, toast the bun.
raven
@cleek: I’ve got drip pan inserts and cats are pulling them out and chewing them up!
cleek
@raven:
awesome! and i just ordered a bunch of them, not 20 minutes ago.
can’t wait to see if our cats like them :)
Omnes Omnibus
Obligatory.
HinTN
@Jager: I wish I had the energy to look for the YouTube of the idiots delicately adding LOx to burning charcoal. Thankfully, they understood the danger and had a very long pole to tip the bucket. Ity didn’t take much for EVERYTHING to go away.
Cheryl from Maryland
RE: Mayo Wars — Sir Kensington’s (which is only at one chi-chi grocery store, so usually Duke’s).
NotMax
Jacques Pepin’s open face burgers.
Starfish
It appears no one has made a mustard joke at John Cole’s expense yet in this thread. I am disappointed in all of you.
HinTN
@debbie:
Natch, but never on a burger.
zhena gogolia
@WaterGirl:
We’re on the last episode of Modern Love. It is nowhere near as good as the first season. The first episode with Minnie Driver and Tom Burke was pretty good, but it has really slid from there.
zhena gogolia
@Mike in NC:
Ooh, I’ll have to look for those. I used to swear by Wolferman’s (I grew up in KCMO and they were based there and the muffins were fantastic), but they are not that good any more. Stop & Shop has a store brand of which the Jumbo are pretty good, but they always run out of them before I can get them.
HinTN
@germy: Thick slabs thereof. None of this minced nonsense.
zhena gogolia
Winstead’s burgers in KCMO are my favorite. Thin, crispy, and smashed.
ETA: With of course a hot fudge shake to go with them.
a thousand flouncing lurkers was fidelio
@CaseyL: I’m glad it was easy to find, thanks to modern technology!
My cousin used to have a restaurant in Havre, MT—he says in a small town without much else nearby, a fair place is popular and a really good one is legendary.
HinTN
@Phylllis: Miracle Whip is not a food! Dukes is wonderful, Hellman’s better.
NotMax
@Omnes Omnibus
FYI.
Incidentally, the chain begun by Buffett shuttered its last remaining location this past October.
Michael Cain
Big Al’s 60/40 burger, Fort Collins CO.
arrieve
@WaterGirl: I started Bosch last week after you had written about it — it’s come up here before but never when I was looking for something to watch. Now I’m halfway through season 4.
My classes just started again this week so tv watching time will be limited, but this is the first show in a while where I’ve been watching at 11 o’clock at night, and thinking, just one more episode. I love all of the characters from Crate and Barrel up to the man himself.
NotMax
@HinTN
And for the cheese, the kind that comes from a spray can.
//
Matt McIrvin
@germy: A friend of mine once speculated that synthetic meat would need to be randomized instead of replicated from a recognizable template, because it’s fine for your meat to resemble something that came out of an animal if it’s a bit different every time, but if in every single steak you were to start watching out for “the blood vessel in sector 7G” that would become gross in a hurry.
HinTN
@Jay C: You don’t have to soak it and you don’t have to trim it (unless you need the space). Just cook it like you said. Heaven!!!
JAFD
Trust you’re using the foot-long ‘barbecue matches’ to light your charcoal. So please save the extinguished matchsticks for me – they’re very useful in model building.
Mayo – I prefer Mrs. Schlorer’s – has more vinegar and less sugar than Hellman’s. Seems to me they also make Shop-Rite’s store brand.
There are a lot of edibles that are good on or with hamburgers. But good beef, not overcooked, is great even unadorned.
HinTN
@Omnes Omnibus: Never got to say the other day how much I enjoyed those hip hop links in the music thread. Oh yeah!
HinTN
@NotMax: Please don’t make my champipple come out my nose.
Josie
I make my own buns from a no knead focaccia recipe and use Hellman’s mayo, lettuce, tomato, red onion, and avocado. My son likes cheese (usually provolone) on his, but I don’t.
jeffreyw
Pete Mack
I mostly use the grill for chicken (tandoori is great!) and smoked Italian sausage.
Omnes Omnibus
@HinTN: You are very welcome.
Punchy
@NotMax: Wait….even the one in Key West is closed? I figured that location was bullet-proof, with the huge popularity of Jimmy B and the cruise industry bringing in new marks almost daily…
NotMax
I guess it is a regional thing, but anyone else remember the jars of red hamburger relish?
VeniceRiley
@Frank Wilhoit: One thing I recently noticed about pan burgers (thanks to pandemic delivery shopping for groceries) is that regular ground beef in a styrofoam with cling wrap cooks up much much better than the plastic sealed airless square bricks. Both burgers and loose meat were better seared and flavored. I think the fresh ground is looser and that lets both heat and flavor to permeate? Also Sears better.
McDonalds has gone to fresh under pressure from In n Out and their QP is tastier than it used to be by far. They ruined my palate, as I now need ketchup mustard chopped onion and pickle all on the same side mixed up. Mmmmmm.
I do enjoy a Karl Strauss Farmhouse with the beer braised pork belly and egg on top. And I like their grass fed beef burger for the flavor and the perfect bacon.
NotMax
Does one spread the ivermectin on the burger or on the bun?
Asking for a nutball.
//
Suzanne
@WaterGirl:
I have heard that as such: “sex is like pizza; even when it’s bad, it’s still pretty good”.
As someone who is deeply meh about pizza……
MontyTheClipArtMongoose
@OzarkHillbilly: an epstein. at harvard. what can go wrong?
Redshift
My burger of choice is cheddar, lettuce, tomato, pickles, and brown mustard, if I’m getting it grilled fresh. If I’m getting it at a good burger place, I’ll often skip the cheese and get a fried egg on top, because I’m somewhat lactose intolerant, and the cheese at most restaurants is fine, but not good enough for the extra bother.
Central Planning
@cope: I’m with you on the rolls.
I like my burger relatively plain – a little garlic salt, pepper, and a slice of cheese – cheddar or american
I own a Weber natural gas grill – it has a quick connect to my house so I can move it if I need to. I never run out of gas, and I’ve only left it on overnight once.
karen marie
@Steve from Mendocino: Meh on mesquite except in limited circs – like fish – but wood charcoal is where it’s at. I won’t eat food grilled with petroleum-based briquettes.
NotMax
@Central Planning
Former roommate used to joke that sesame seeds were harvested from hamburger buns.
Yarrow
Food related, so I guess it fits here. This is a bad sign:
Jeffro
@randy khan: Hamburger Hamlet (Georgetown, Chevy Chase, Bethesda, etc) used to make some pretty good burgers, too.
VeniceRiley
@Redshift: That’s true fact about restaurant cheese. I think the most memorable burger of my childhood was at my friens house … his dad cutting a thick slab of cheddar off a block and melting it on a covered grill. Same people that introduced me to ground beef and dill in Mac n cheese, and sour cream in rice a roni!
Jeffro
Yes
VeniceRiley
@Redshift: That’s true fact about restaurant cheese. I think the most memorable burger of my childhood was at my friend’s house … his dad cutting a thick slab of cheddar off a block and melting it on a covered grill. Same people that introduced me to ground beef and dill in Mac n cheese, and sour cream in rice a roni!
randy khan
@Josie:
Tell me more!
sab
Mustard, mayo, tomato, lettuce, sweet onion and sometimes a slice of cheddar. Spousal unit likes mustard, ketchup and pickle(?!)
randy khan
@Jeffro:
Hamburger Hamlet was on its way out when moved here. I’m not sure I ever ate at one. I know I never ate at a Little Tavern, at least one of which is now a Chinese restaurant.
mrmoshpotato
LOL! From food/grill review to fight-in-the-comments!
rikyrah
@Xavier:
The best thing I ever learned from Ina Garten. She taught me about the charcoal chimney. Would never start a fire any other way
rikyrah
As for the burger
Medium well
Cheddar
Grilled onions
Grilled mushrooms
Bacon
Lettuce
Tomato
Mustard
Ketchup
sab
Copper grill mats. You will never have to clean your grill again. Just bring them in and scrub in the sink, or put them in the dishwasher. Your food still tastes charbroiled, but nothing falls through the grill into the fire.
Redshift
@VeniceRiley: Yeah, in my experience if they describe the cheese in more detail (like aged cheddar), that often means it’s better, but if they just say cheddar/swiss/etc, it’s okay but nothing to write home about.
Josie
@randy khan:
This is the recipe I use, only I make four buns instead of six, so that they are hamburger size.
Sandwich Rounds
Ingredients:
2 cups all-purpose flour (plus some for dusting)
3/4 tsp salt
1 tsp instant yeast (or bread machine yeast)
1.25 cups water
1 Tbsp olive oil
2 Tbsp Everything But The Bagel Seasoning (or anything to your taste)
Instructions:
Combine the flour, salt, and yeast in a bowl and stir until very well combined.
Add the water and olive oil and stir until a sticky ball of dough forms. There should be no dry flour left on the bottom of the bowl.
Loosely cover the bowl and let it sit at room temperature for two hours, or until the dough has doubled in size and is very fluffy and bubbly in texture.
Sprinkle some flour on top of the dough and use your hands to scrape it down off the sides of the bowl. Dump the dough out onto a floured surface. The dough will be very loose and sticky, so use flour to keep it from sticking to your hands and work surface.
Divide the dough into six pieces, then shape each into a ball. Use a rolling pin to flatten each ball into a 4 to 5-inch diameter circle. Place the flattened circles on a parchment lined baking sheet.
Brush a thin layer of water on top of each round, then sprinkle about one teaspoon of Everything But the Bagel Seasoning onto each one. Let the sandwich rounds rise for 30 minutes.
Toward the end of the rise time, begin preheating the oven to 400ºF.
Once the oven is fully preheated, transfer the baking sheet to the oven and bake the sandwich rounds for about 25 minutes, or until they’re golden brown.
Remove them from the oven and transfer to a wire rack to cool. The crust may seem really hard immediately after they come out of the oven, but they will soften as they cool. Once cooled serve or store in the refrigerator (3-4 days) or freezer (3 months), in an air-tight container.
Jeffro
@randy khan: At one point the whole chain had over 30 locations, but now even the original Sherman Oaks location is closed.
Good menu (and pretty good food, especially in the age of Bennigans and Chilis) but a lot of other mgmt/location problems.
NotMax
Memorable burgers were the ones ordered at a drug store lunch counter in one of the towns where I lived. No fluorescent lighting and generic fixtures, place dated back to the early 20th century (maybe earlier) and was all dark wood and brass. Long gone now.
Anyhoo, behind the lunch counter was a small window giving a view of the kitchen, where one could watch the meat being freshly ground each time a burger was ordered.
Josie
@randy khan:
I forgot to say that these are not soft and pillowy buns. ;-)
OGLiberal
I have the classic Weber grill with the side table and gas igniter. This is not a gas grill. It is a charcoal grill. The gas is a legit starter – hooks up to one of those little tanks you’d use for a plumbing blowtorch. You need it for about five minutes to get the coals going. Like a chimney but easier. I have bought three and I love the thing. Gives me charcoal flavoring with a pain free start. It is the best thing ever. And unlike the rest of my family, I don’t even eat meat. I do have a cowboy grill/pit that is also great but need a chimney to start that. The mini propane starter flame is genius and can’t recommend it more. The price upgrade from the same model without it is not that much. It is just so good.
geg6
85/15 ground beef. Brioche buns. Sharp cheddar. Lettuce, tomato, onions and pickles. Preferably pickles my John has made from cucumbers from the garden. Condiments are verboten. Why mask the Yummy taste of the beef and veggies with ketchup, mustard or mayo? And hot sauce is an abomination.
HinTN
@Josie: “Those aren’t pillows.”
NotMax
@NotMax
Thinking back on it, the same establishment also made in house their own varieties of chocolate (regular, milk and white), which was sold by the pound in irregularly shaped pieces broken off large slabs.
WaterGirl
@Phylllis: I meant Miracle Whip vs. Mayonniaise!
Pete Downunder
Here in the land down under a slice of beet is usually included. I miss having a slice of tinned jalapeño on my cheese burger from my California days. I don’t miss always having to specify “no mayo”. I have no issue with mayo but not on a burger.
WaterGirl
@cleek: That is a great show! And what an honor!
RandomMonster
I have a system down for grilled burgers, based on simple ingredients and techniques. Never fails.
WaterGirl
@arrieve: Yes, I am quite fond of all the characters in Bosch at this point! I think my favorite detail is the partner’s name – J Edgar!
I understand the barrels part of Crate & Barrel, but I don’t get the Crate part. If someone wanted to explain it to me, I would be grateful.
randy khan
@Josie:
I would have been surprised if they were.
I’m very interested that the rise time seems to be less than the regular focaccia recipe I use. I’m going to have to try this.
WaterGirl
@JAFD: Not foot-long matches, but they are 4.5″ and made of wood.
geg6
@Central Planning:
Same grill we have. I love using the natural gas! We have gas hookup outside just for it.
WaterGirl
@Suzanne: That works, too!
trollhattan
I’m-a say perfect burger begins with beef-pork blend cooked over mesquite lump charcoal. How you handle that determines level of success.
Doing grilled chicken breast tonight, probably adding to the PM2.5 level but just can’t imagine hot cooking inside right now. Was given a reprieve from the food crime that is boneless, skinless, these have bones and skins attached like gawd intended. No feathers.
Josie
@randy khan: Yes, the focaccia recipe that this is derived from has an overnight sit time and an hour rise time after being formed.
OGLiberal
BTW, the latest burger fad at our house had been almost zero prep. Ground beef, Montreal Steak seasoning on both sides, cook, serve. My family loves them. I eat veggie burgers with the seasoning as well but can’t really provide a personal review of the actual burgers. We’ve tried many more complex options but they seem to like the simple one best.
WaterGirl
@RandomMonster: I see that you are not sharing!
Sure Lurkalot
@WaterGirl: I started buying bread curbside at Panera during the pandemic. I’m not a baker and I wanted something better than the grocery store offerings…now I’m hooked. Their brioche hamburger buns are a great find too.
I’m a boring burger person. I like Buffalo or ground sirloin, lettuce, tomato, raw onion and pickles or pickled jalapeños. I do not like cheese with meat (not for religious reasons). I love seared tuna burgers with wasabi mayo and Asian slaw for the not really a burger burger.
trollhattan
May I add have found the electric starters for charcoal are the “best.”
James E Powell
@NotMax:
I was a cook at the Cleveland area Big Boy – local chain called Manners – and our Big Boys had a white, mayo and something sauce. Marriott bought out the local chain, dropped the Manners name, and changed the sauce to red relish. They said it was the original. I have no idea of the brand.
Customers went New Coke level crazy and we had to put together some semblance of the old sauce to keep the peace. After a short time, the owners let us go back to whatever the white sauce was.
OGLiberal
@OGLiberal: Should add, mesquite or cherry wood charcoal.
Suzanne
I should note that I prefer ground turkey to ground beef, generally prefer Swiss cheese, and I like pickles and jalapeños.
Barbara
@WaterGirl: Panera has a program that allows charitable organizations to collect unused baked goods at the end of the day to distribute. My husband’s church has participated for around 10 years. It has always made me favorably disposed to patronize them.
burnspbesq
The burger joint I grew up with, The Fireplace on Route 17 in Paramus, NJ, closed about a month ago, a casualty of the pandemic.
When I first moved to OC in 1986, there was a burger place on Bristol St. in Costa Mesa—so long gone that I’ve forgotten the name—that made a guacamole bacon Swiss burger that was to die for.
WaterGirl
@Barbara: That’s good to know.
WaterGirl
@burnspbesq:
Good combination. I think I will try cheddar, avocado and bacon for my next burger.
E.
It is no longer possible to have the perfect burger. We know too much. I think it’s going to start to be that way about a lot of things.
lowtechcyclist
Best burger I’ve ever had is the brie and caramelized onion cheeseburger at Duffy’s Tavern on Anna Maria Island in Florida. It’s also the only burger I’ve ever had that’s better than what I can grill.
Had one just the other night, actually – we were down there on vacation this past week. We’ve been going down there every year since 2009, last year excepted of course.
A Ghost to Most
Open thread: my sister and BIL came to visit, a very nice time except for the mountain drive. They freaked out on what I consider 2/10 paved roads, like Guanella Pass. So taking them up rock roads was out of the question.
Some people stop living long before they die.
RandomMonster
@WaterGirl: I didn’t want to bore people if no one is interested. Okay, here goes:
For 2 burgers:
WaterGirl
@RandomMonster: Sounds good! But a half-pound burger? Holy shit, I could never eat that much.
Kent
Or, you gotta spend a lot of $$$ and buy stuff like free-range bison meat from a ranch in the Dakotas administered by a Sioux Indians, pair it with farm-to-market tomatoes, onions, etc. and get artisanal cheddar from some local co-op
Like the famous Portlandia episode about the chicken.
burnspbesq
@NotMax:
CiP in Lahaina was a pretty cool place, good burgers and a hell of a view.
martha
@A Ghost to Most: oh the Guanella Pass drive is beautiful. I like Cottonwood Pass too. We may hit Independence Pass in a few weeks :-)
James E Powell
@burnspbesq:
I ate there. I had no idea it was not associated with Jimmy Buffett. Not like I asked.
surfk9
@burnspbesq: Been there it was good!
Abnormal Hiker
@CaseyL: I did the Burgess Shale hike about 5 years ago. The guide was very emphatic about no souvenirs. We did collect fossils and compared finds before heading down. No burgers or that day but my friend Steve took me to the 7th floor buffet at Chateau Lake Louise afterwards. He had celebrated his 25th wedding anniversary there a few years before and that gave him free lifetime access to the buffet. We did get a little side eye – very few people dressed in hiking gear.
CaseyL
@Abnormal Hiker:
Oh that hotel! Just magnificent. One of the great railway hotels that were built around the turn of the 20th Century, to encourage tourism. I saw what might be another of them, the Frontenac in Quebec City. Was the buffet lavish?
We found a lot of fossils in the fields, and were very good about putting them back exactly where we found them :)
We reached the quarry just before a storm started brewing, so our visit was cut short.
We were told that the mountain top was not a great place to be in a storm. Besides the risk of wind and lightning, it’s all shale there. The path to the top is a few inches wide, surrounded by steep slopes of shale, which were already pretty slippery to navigate and become even more so when wet – so we had to leave in a bit of a hurry. (And it was raining pretty hard by the time we got to the bottom.)
I’m really sorry I can’t handle the hike again, because I would love to have a more leisurely visit!
RandomMonster
@WaterGirl: You make good points! Actually, we sometimes divide the 1lbs into thirds. In either case, given just 2 of us we have leftovers. This morning RandomMrs put them in her “eggs mangle” (scramble). It was tasty.
Another Scott
@CaseyL: We visited Yellowstone and Grand Teton NP a few years ago. I got sunburned our first day. :-/ We were doing a quick hike up the middle Teton when the clouds rolled in and it started to rain. Lightning and thunder soon followed. It was loud and scary and we high-tailed it off the mountain.
Exciting!
We’ve always liked Banff. I’ve only been up there when there was a conference being held at the Banff Centre for the Arts (a very nice facility). J has been up to Jasper, but I’ve not been that far north yet. We’ll have to put it on the list to get over to the Shale. We really enjoyed the Mammoth Site in SD.
Thanks.
Cheers,
Scott.
Brachiator
@E.:
Coming late to the thread.
Burgers, tacos, pizza are simple foods. Peasant foods. They don’t require a lot of thinking to do right.
I love burgers. When I was a kid, burgers were one of the few foods I would eat. This worried my mother, but my pediatrician said don’t worry because I was getting good nutrition from the limited menu I liked.
Burgers on the grill are great, but you don’t always have time to wait. Some of the best burgers I had was when I was out camping while in the Boy Scouts. The patties had that extra flavor that can only be imparted by having hungry, over eager kids drop the patties in the dirt with a little quick wiping.
Okay. Less disgusting: a long time ago there was a place I think called Lightfoots in Dallas that had memorable burgers. It was an extra touch of black pepper. And it wasn’t just that they were great burgers. It was discovering that even as a kid I could recognize the distinctive style of particular burger joints and have favorites.
Oddly enough, I don’t think I have had a burger in a foreign country.
Wil
McCormicks Mayonesa con Jugo de Limon.
Abnormal Hiker
@CaseyL: The buffet was just hors d’oeuvre type food but we had our fill. I was worried that we’d be thrown out but Steve didn’t hesitate to ask the waitstaff to refill an empty coffee pot. We were late getting there. There was a 77 year old guy who slipped on the shale and Steve and I stayed behind with the guide to help him down. He must have fibbed about his age since there is a 75 year age limit.
CaseyL
@Another Scott: Oh, you must. And while you’re in the area, I also very highly recommend the Royal Tyrrell Museum which has a wonderful collection of paleo critters, with a particular emphasis on the Cambrian Era, due to the proximity of the Burgess Shale. So many trilobites – so many kinds of trilobites! I hadn’t realized there was such a variety.
@Abnormal Hiker: Kudos to anyone in that age group taking a shot at the hike! The Ranger guides do it every day, just about, so they’re in tip top condition. I have to say it’s a little dispiriting to be struggling up the trail (panting, sweating, and feeling like your legs are turning into overcooked pasta) while they leap from rock to rock like gazelle, pointing out the sights.
Gin & Tonic
@CaseyL: Late to the thread, but the Frontenac is fantastic. We spent 3 days there in February a couple of years ago, arrived on the last day of the winter carnival. Goddamn but it was cold…
normal liberal
Every now and then I realize that I hang on lurking because you are my tribe, willing or not. I have Water Girl’s exact grill set-up, complete with the charcoal chimney. Technically it belongs to my brother, but he lives in an apartment, and I have the house with the deck. The perfect hamburger? Very good quality meat, salt, pepper and lightly doused with aged balsamic.
Anyone who attended an outdoor sporting event in central Illinois today is a masochist of the first order. Even by August standards the weather was revolting.
I did the Panera thing at 6:30 this morning. They were running behind. In the fifteen minutes I waited for my breakfast, lunch, beverages and bread, about 10 people came into the store and not a god-damned one of them was masked. Some felt compelled to come hang with me near the order shelves, but oddly retreated after I glared at them over my mask. Illinois is back under a mask order indoors, almost universally ignored. I want to start carrying a riding crop so I can swish it at people and keep them at bay.
Speaking of Bay’s, those English muffins are a continuing affirmation that coming home to the Midwest was a good idea.
Martin
Late to this, but didn’t see mention of the maillard reaction. It’s the chemical reaction when food browns, and theres a series of reactions that take place in many foods at high temp – such as in beef. On the stove, its hard to get to these temps because the liquid from the meat cools it. But on a grill, you don’t get this. Plus you can grill at much higher temps. I have a big Weber gas grill and can do steaks and burgers at 700 deg. Also good for pizza. At these temps you get this really nice barky texture on the outside that has a really distinctive flavor.
Mike in Oly
@Cheryl from Maryland: Totally agree about Sir Kensington’s. So good. Their chipotle mayo is also amazing, if you can find it. I found it once at our high-end grocery and it never appeared again.
Chris T.
@James E Powell: To really get your charcoal grill going fast, use the liquid oxygen method.
Ramalama
@cope: My new band name will henceforth be called “Buns of choice,” thank you and good night.
Ramalama
@RandomMonster: How long does it take for a charcoal grill (using the chimney starter) to get hot enough to cook?
WaterGirl
@Ramalama: I would guess that it took ours maybe 15 minutes? But someone else may be able to give you a better answer.