Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

So many bastards, so little time.

Following reporting rules is only for the little people, apparently.

Nothing worth doing is easy.

“They not like us!” (that’s for sure!)

Give the craziest people you know everything they want and hope they don’t ask for more? Great plan.

if you can’t see it, then you are useless in the fight to stop it.

ha ha ha! Nice try weird people.

“And when the Committee says to “report your income,” that could mean anything!

The problem people have with Biden’s age is the color of the VPs skin.

Hi god, it’s us. Thanks a heap, you’re having a great week and it’s only Thursday!

Of course you can have champagne before noon. That’s why orange juice was invented.

If West Virginia and San Francisco had a love child.

Fuck that bum, let’s go Joe!

The republican speaker is a slippery little devil.

“The defense has a certain level of trust in defendant that the government does not.”

We’re not going back!

Make the republican party small enough to drown in a bathtub.

Today’s gop: why go just far enough when too far is right there?

with the Kraken taking a plea, the Cheese stands alone.

They fucked up the fucking up of the fuckup!

This really is a full service blog.

You are so fucked. Still, I wish you the best of luck.

The gop couldn’t organize an orgy in a whorehouse with a fist full of 50s.

Something needs to be done about our bogus SCOTUS.

You are here: Home / Pet Blogging / Cat Blogging / Sunday Morning Open Thread: VitaMegaCATaMix

Sunday Morning Open Thread: VitaMegaCATaMix

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They’re no Jorts, but the Vitamix Kitnapping Trio are a little Sunday treat.

… It arrived on Dec. 16 at their home on Vancouver Island in British Columbia. Jessica put the hefty box down on the floor in the kitchen, just for a second. Her 4-year-old tuxedo cat, Max, otherwise known as the “sentient soccer ball,” jumped up on the box. Jessica thought it was funny and snapped a photo.

Then Max’s 13-year-old feline siblings, George: Destroyer of Worlds (“sentient potato”) and Lando Calrissian (“the questionably sentient dust bunny,”), demanded their turn on the knee-high box…

On Jan. 2, the couple reached out to Vitamix on a public Facebook post, asking for three empty boxes that might fool the cats into relinquishing the appliance. The company immediately obliged, but between snowstorms and customs, the empty boxes have yet to arrive — and Nikii and Jessica aren’t quite sure how the boxes will fit in their small apartment, much less if they will satisfy the cats.

But the duo and their many followers are happy to let the battle run its course…

Reader Interactions

90Comments

  5. 5.

    NotMax

    Q: Are there no prisons? Are there no workhouses?
    A: Yes to the first and we’ll get back to y’all on the second.

    Alabama officials say federal rules do not appear to block the state’s plan to use $400 million in pandemic relief funds to build prisons, although the U.S. Treasury Department document states that new prisons are generally not an eligible use of the money. Source

  8. 8.

    SiubhanDuinne

    I love that these three moggies are tag-teaming to knock Jorts and Jean off their comfortable top-of-the-cat-memes stack.

  9. 9.

    Another Scott

    Opinion | I was a lifelong liberal Democrat. Then my cats took my Vitamix blender hostage.

    — New York Times Pitchbot (@DougJBalloon) January 9, 2022

    Cheers,
    Scott.

  11. 11.

    Geminid

    Joe comin’. To Atlanta, Georgia on Tuesday.

       Fresh off a high-profle speech in which he warned that a dagger had been placed at the throat of American democracy, Joe Biden will travel to the state White House officials view as “ground zero” for Republican-led election suppression efforts.

    “We are doubling down, kicking into high gear, we are going right to the belly of the beast, ground zero for voter suppression, voter subversion and obstruction, said Cedric Richmond, senior White House advisor.

    Politico Jan.9 2022

  13. 13.

    NotMax

    Mentioned some time back that (years and years ago) bought as a gag gift for a friend a Carl Cthulhu.

    Lady he was shacked up with at the time (they’ve since wed) had nine – count ’em, none – cats. In a one-bedroom apartment

    As an experiment to see how and if they would react, he set Carl on the floor and switched him on. He swears to this day all nine almost immediately arrayed themselves in a semi-circle in front of it, all of them in the classic Sphinx position. And did the same every time Carl was brought out.

  17. 17.

    ALurkSupreme

    Showed my wife the story about the crazy cat lady and the Vitamix boxes.

    Her reply:  “Pfft.  The minute those extra boxes arrive, the cats will lose all interest in them.”

    Sounds about right.

  19. 19.

    mrmoshpotato

    @NotMax:

    As an experiment to see how and if they would react, he set Carl on the floor and switched him on. 

    What does Carl do when on?

  21. 21.

    BC in Illinois

    @NotMax:

    I went to Google Maps, and as soon as I typed in “This,” it directed me to “This Street, Porters Lake, NS Canada.

  22. 22.

    geg6

    Heh.  Kitties gonna kitty.  Made my morning.

    Nice to see Soonergrunt stopped by last night.  Sorry I missed it.

  23. 23.

    OzarkHillbilly

    As a leading art historian, Christopher Wright has uncovered several old master paintings in public and private collections over five decades. Now he has discovered that a copy of a painting by Sir Anthony van Dyck, which he bought for himself for £65 in 1970, may actually be an original by the 17th-century Flemish court painter to King Charles I.

    “I bought it from a jobbing dealer in west London,” he said. “I was buying it as a copy, as an art historian. I took no notice of it, in a strange way. The syndrome is the cobbler’s children are the worst shod. So the art historian’s collection is the least looked at.” Wright estimated the painting might be worth around £40,000, although some Van Dycks have fetched seven-figure sums.

    ………………………………
    He looked at the infanta’s portrait more closely only after it caught the eye of a visitor to his home, Colin Harrison, senior curator of European Art at the Ashmolean Museum, Oxford. “He comes to see me. We chat. He says, ‘I really think your picture is by Van Dyck,’’’ said Wright.

    “When you own something, you don’t take any notice of it. It was the sitter’s hands that set it off. That’s what Colin noticed.”

    Harrison recalled: “In the normal way of a museum curator, Iimmediately was looking around the walls. It seemed to me that this was an interesting and possibly good picture [and] that, if you got the hands right, Van Dyck may very well have painted them.”

    When buying it, Wright had assumed that it was one of numerous copies of Van Dyck’s infanta portraits in various formats, including full, three-quarter and half-length versions. His is half-length, an oil on canvas measuring 81.5cm by 70.5cm.

    Makes me wonder how good he is at his job. In his defense,

    “It was dirty and had yellow varnish, but it was in decent condition,” he said. “The whole thing looks absolutely magnificent now.”

    If you’re looking for 2nd hand rubbish, that’s what you’ll see.

  26. 26.

    WaterGirl

    @OzarkHillbilly: That’s kind of surprising.  Every friend I have who is a carpenter or does construction immediately comments on what ever building they are in.  I see a room and they see the skeleton and the structure and the workmanship.

    It’s not something that turns off – they literally see the world differently.

    People who do body work instantly notice that someone is leaning, or one shoulder is lower than the other.  That doesn’t turn off just because they aren’t seeing a patient.

    I don’t see who this guy missed this.  I, too, wonder how good he is at his job.

  27. 27.

    NotMax

    @WaterGirl

    “OMG! The signature at the bottom! Is this an original Picasso?”

    “Don’t get too worked up. Yes it is, but it’s a Bambi Picasso. Different market entirely.”

    :)

  31. 31.

    Le Comte de Monte Cristo, fka Edmund Dantes

    So wife is COVID positive and been symptomatic since the day after Xmas.

    I am not, but suffering a standard Dec/Jan bronchial cough (my test was done Friday am, hers on Sunday).

    It makes little sense. We’ve shared a bed 3 in 5 days (I snore, she sends me out).  We’ve had intimate contact with some, uh, sharing of wine I won’t overdescribe. She goes nowhere, I go only to work and home. When her test came back she was blaming my work party that she didn’t attend, but since I’m negative, that’s out, and nobody else in the family – including my aged parents from Xmas Eve – has it. Oldest daughter and I posit that it came in on mail or in a Prime delivery.

    At least I’m not being blamed anymore.

  32. 32.

    Another Scott

    One for WG, Steep, and the other coders out there…

    It's possible to automate this technique and download most or all of an account's tweets archived on Wayback Machine/Internet Archive. Here's how to write a basic Python program to download the tweets and store them as a CSV file.

    (Pastebin link to source code at end of thread) https://t.co/rveyokPcLd

    — Conspirador Norteño (@conspirator0) January 6, 2022

    (IIRC, there were some old efg or Schlamezel comments that are visible in the Wayback Machine that somehow are invisible here (got lost/corrupted in one of the transitions).)

    I’ll have to try it one of these days, when I get one of those elusive round tuits.

    (via JJMacNab)

    Cheers,
    Scott.

  38. 38.

    Another Scott

    @Le Comte de Monte Cristo, fka Edmund Dantes: Sorry.  :-(

    A friend we met outdoors on NYE said that her aunt’s family got infected and all tested positive quickly except for the husband.  He only tested positive 5 days after everyone else.  The virus is tricky…

    Be careful, and good luck.

    Cheers,
    Scott.

  41. 41.

    Frankensteinbeck

    @WaterGirl: ​
    Yes. As a professional author, I analyse every story I consume, prod phrasing for whether it can be improved, and even do the same for random speech. I can’t stop doing it, which can sometimes really mess with enjoying media.

  42. 42.

    NotMax

    @Frankensteinbeck

    I just wish e-books were more diligently monitored for typos, misspellings and misused tenses. Drives me batty how rife they are, they take me right out of the reader’s reverie.

  43. 43.

    Gin & Tonic

    Russia is now militarily intervening in 7 countries. Propping up tyrants in Syria & Kazakhstan, occupying territory in Georgia, Ukraine & Moldova, destabilizing Libya, & seizing mines in Central African Republic.

    Complaints about “Western Imperialism” are at this point a farce.
    — Der Kraut (@Der_Parrot) January 7, 2022

  44. 44.

    JPL

    @Yarrow: What a horrifying ordeal.   Thank you for mentioning that she posted again.   Although three hours is not enough, at least she did manage some shuteye.

  47. 47.

    germy

    @Frankensteinbeck:  @NotMax:

    An old wine-bibber having been smashed in a railway collision, some wine was poured on his lips to revive him. “Pauillac, 1873,” he murmured and died.

    (Ambrose Bierce, Devil’s Dictionary)

  49. 49.

    WaterGirl

    @Gin & Tonic: Yeah, I went back to last night’s thread to see what Suzanne was talking about.  The first clue that something big had happened was that when I searched for “Suzanne” 63 matches came up!

    Holy shit that was scary, and I’m sure it still is in retrospect.  Sometimes “what if” can really get you after the fact.

  51. 51.

    Barbara

    @WaterGirl: Expectations can override even the best analysis. You just can’t imagine finding an authentic masterpiece in a secondhand shop. You make assumptions accordingly.  During the course of his career he has probably disappointed many people hoping to validate their bargain finds as “the real thing.”

  53. 53.

    Barbara

    @Le Comte de Monte Cristo, fka Edmund Dantes: Do you interact with your mail carrier? It doesn’t take much. My son tested positive on Xmas day, bad head cold, quickly resolved. No one else tested positive.  We think most likely it was the one hour in a car with his driving instructor. We might well have gotten it as well (stopped testing after a while) but if we did we didn’t know it.

  54. 54.

    debbie

    @WaterGirl:

    You’re assuming he’s being honest when he says he hadn’t realized what he’d bought

    ETA: Especially because he’s an art historian!

    ETAETA: Why isn’t there a picture of the painting in the article?

  55. 55.

    Suzanne

    @WaterGirl:  We are all okay. I spoke with my next-door neighbor, who also witnessed the dude, and we are about to deal with the insurance company and start all that nonsense.

    I have some coffee, which helps.

  58. 58.

    Betty Cracker

    Pretty good “do something” column by Ezra Klein in today’s NYT. He quotes Wisconsin’s Ben Wikler, who will get a chance to take Ron Johnson down this year:

    “If you want to fight for the future of American democracy, you shouldn’t spend all day talking about the future of American democracy,” Wikler said. “These local races that determine the mechanics of American democracy are the ventilation shaft in the Republican death star. These races get zero national attention. They hardly get local attention. Turnout is often lower than 20 percent. That means people who actually engage have a superpower. You, as a single dedicated volunteer, might be able to call and knock on the doors of enough voters to win a local election.”

    ICYMI, Johnson announced he’s running for reelection (WSJ). I don’t know WI enough to know whether that’s good news or not, but it seems like it would be since Johnson is such a dolt.

  61. 61.

    Avalune

    Leto was telling me about Suzanne last night. Crazytown.

    These cats lol. It’s a cute story but I’d be scattering some cats were it me. Guess that’s why I have a dog.

    We made Bella homemade food last night after two days of her basically not eating and she ate it up and as importantly held it down. So we gave her some more this morning and so far so good. She’s looking less lethargic and weak today. Hopefully we can get a few good meals in her.

    Tried to hide the incontinence pill in marshmallow today. She didn’t smell it right away this time but clocked it after a bite and spit the whole thing out. Lol. Eat this or stay off my couch dog!

  63. 63.

    OzarkHillbilly

    @debbie: Ummm, there is a picture.

    eta: As for this:

    You’re assuming he’s being honest when he says he hadn’t realized what he’d bought

    Why would he tell a lie that might damage his professional reputation?​​

  64. 64.

    Ceci n est pas mon nym

    @Le Comte de Monte Cristo, fka Edmund Dantes: I’ve been going out a little into the world, she hasn’t. As we watch local cases skyrocket and businesses closing back down with no notice, she’s been getting steadily more anxious about my excursions.

    I hit a tipping point this week and decided I’m going back into lockdown, though I’m hoping this one will be for only 2-3 weeks instead of 14 months. I really would hate to be the carrier of a breakthrough infection.

  66. 66.

    dc

    Just pick up the cats and move them. I have cats. They can be moved. Or just start opening the box around them. They aren’t tiger sized. And they aren’t trying to get them to swallow a pill or cut their nails. Just move them.

  67. 67.

    Yarrow

    @debbie: @OzarkHillbilly: He also bought it in 1970. Had to be early in his career when he was not nearly as experienced as he is now.

    I can see how he could have mentally marked it as a copy and not really looked closely at it for ages. Sometimes it’s hardest to see the things closest to us.

  68. 68.

    Barbara

    @Betty Cracker: I have a running theory that for some voters the stupider the  candidate the better. What better way to say that any white man is preferable to any other demographic category?

  69. 69.

    OzarkHillbilly

    @debbie: To up the auction value? Not having knowledge of the high dollar art world, I’m trying to imagine how that would work. And besides,

    Now, having realised its significance, he wants it to go to a public institution. He is putting it on permanent loan to the Cannon Hall Museum, Barnsley, which boasts a collection of fine 17th-century Dutch and Flemish paintings.

  72. 72.

    Ceci n est pas mon nym

    @dc: That point is addressed in the article. The counterargument is basically “oh pooh, that’s no fun.”

  73. 73.

    dkinPa

    @Suzanne: How awful for your family!  Keeping fingers crossed that nobody gets sick from this, and that you’re able to get a cleaning firm/handyman in quickly to clean up your house and get everything repaired.

  77. 77.

    StringOnAStick

    @WaterGirl: We have a friend who did costuming in Hollywood for movies and theatre; her specialty was period costuming and that includes through modern times.  She can’t look at any visual media without seeing the clothes through that lens.

  78. 78.

    Damned_at_Random

    Machias sat in my lap for over an hour this morning because he heard the words “steelhead” and “football” and he was pretty sure he wanted to be involved. (He’ll get a taste of the steelhead)

  79. 79.

    trollhattan

    @NotMax:

    Good lord. Alabama, sheeeeeeeyuttt.

    Well now, let’s siphon off some DoD money to build schools and see what they think.

  82. 82.

    Suzanne

    Heard from the police a few minutes ago. Dude is still at the hospital, and will be charged with breaking and entering, destruction of property, criminal mischief, and indecent exposure. He has a drug charge from about ten years ago.

    We saw his Facebook page. His profile picture is a selfie taken in a mirror in a public restroom, with no shirt on. He still couldn’t manage to get his full ugly face in the frame. Dude really needs to get in the habit of wearing more clothes, because he has a large and recognizable tattoo, which is visible in the picture. He is not being charged with being stupid AF.

  83. 83.

    Frank Wilhoit

    @dc: Nail clippers are the anti-can-opener.  For most of ours, it suffices just to talk about giving them medicine: they stroll away with a strongly misleading appearance of unconcern.

  84. 84.

    Miss Bianca

    @Suzanne:

    He is not being charged with being stupid AF.

    If being stupid AF were an actual crime, there wouldn’t be jails and prisons enough to hold us all.

  85. 85.

    Chetan Murthy

    It’s been a while, and this thread is almost-dead, so I’ll ask the obvious (non-cat-owner) question: I don’t understand why the owners didn’t just pick up the cat, move it, and then unpack the box.  I mean, c’mon, you pick up one cat, put in the bedroom.  Then pick up another, put it in the bathroom, etc, etc.  What am I missing?

  88. 88.

    Chetan Murthy

    @NotMax: My conclusion was that none of this “saga” happened — it was just like the saga of Jorts and Jean, another in the category of Internet fiction.

  89. 89.

    Ruckus

    @Miss Bianca:

    You are on fire today.

    @Suzanne:

    Miss Bianca is correct, there wouldn’t be enough jails or people to actually run them.

    Glad things went, I can’t say OK but it did work out better than it could have gone. Best of luck with the clean up and all of you to actually be able to sleep.

  90. 90.

    Gvg

    @Chetan Murthy: They we’re having fun and weren’t really in a hurry to get the vita max open. Probabaly something they thought was nice but not urgently open it now. They observed the cats being very interested, and it amused them.

    Usually cats get bored of a new box in a few hours. This time it went on and on and on….the owners thought it was funny and told their friends who told their friends….They absolutely could end it any time, and are choosing not to. People who aren’t amused by it, get to not pay any attention and those that do will watch. Eventually all the cats and internet watchers will get bored and wander off.

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