Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

People identifying as christian while ignoring christ and his teachings is a strange thing indeed.

There are no moderate republicans – only extremists and cowards.

The lights are all blinking red.

Peak wingnut was a lie.

Roe isn’t about choice, it’s about freedom.

If you cannot answer whether trump lost the 2020 election, you are unfit for office.

Stamping your little feets and demanding that they see how important you are? Not working anymore.

Republicans don’t lie to be believed, they lie to be repeated.

One of our two political parties is a cult whose leader admires Vladimir Putin.

American History and Black History can not be separated.

Fight them, without becoming them!

Well, whatever it is, it’s better than being a Republican.

Republicans: “Abortion is murder but you can take a bus to get one.” Easy peasy.

This year has been the longest three days of putin’s life.

Why is it so hard for them to condemn hate?

“I was told there would be no fact checking.”

“The difference between stupidity and genius is that genius has its limits.”

The truth is, these are not very bright guys, and things got out of hand.

Let the trolls come, and then ignore them. that’s the worst thing you can do to a troll.

Never entrust democracy to any process that requires Republicans to act in good faith.

Donald Trump found guilty as fuck – May 30, 2024!

New McCarthy, same old McCarthyism.

Beware of advice from anyone for whom Democrats are “they” and not “we.”

The line between political reporting and fan fiction continues to blur.

You are here: Home / Medium Cool / Medium Cool with BGinCHI – Pitch Us Your Story!

Medium Cool with BGinCHI – Pitch Us Your Story!

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In case you’re new to Medium Cool, BGinCHI is here once a week to offer a thread on culture, mainly film & books, with some TV thrown in.  We’re here at 7 pm on Sunday nights.

Medium Cool with BGinCHI – Pitch Us Your Story

 

In my Screenwriting class, which I teach each summer, students write short scripts. It’s one of my favorite classes, as this kind of writing is different due to the restraints it imposes. One of the things all screenwriters do is write what are called “loglines.” These are the 1-2 sentence pitches that hook the reader and describe the central conflict of the story.

EXAMPLES

A young F.B.I. cadet must confide in an incarcerated and manipulative killer to receive his help on catching another serial killer who skins his victims.

With the help of a German bounty hunter, a freed slave sets out to rescue his wife from a brutal Mississippi plantation owner.

A young police officer must prevent a bomb exploding aboard a city bus by keeping its speed above 50 mph.

In this week’s Medium Cool, write us a logline for:

– Your life under social distancing;

– A film you’d like to see;

– A scenario for an (unnamed) living person (“Blowhard real estate failure becomes POTUS, loses reelection in landslide, goes to prison for 20 years.”)

Can’t wait to see what you come up with!

Who knows when Hollywood producers might be lurking?

Reader Interactions

145Comments

  2. 2.

    Big R

    My life: “A young professor moves to a tropical island, meets the love of his life, and is forced to flee the country ahead of a coup.”

    A film I’d like to see: “What happens to those who cling to a culture that no longer serves its participants? A far-future humanity wrestles with how to handle those left behind by their exodus.”

    An unnamed living person: “She could either be the next prime minister, or she could get evicted. Either or, really.”

  7. 7.

    Baud

    Dark horse presidential candidate captivates nation, but a skeleton from his past threatens to ruin it all.

  8. 8.

    Yarrow

    A film you’d like to see;

    Updated “Team America” but this time we fight home grown terrorists.

  14. 14.

    Jeff Del Papa

    Not a logline, just a silly scene that may explain the wall space situation in my house.

     

    Screenplay for [some noir film]
    Scene #nn
    Setting:

    Open to an urban church basement meeting room, that last had its decor updated in the 30’s. By the door a folding rental style  table, with a large, dated coffee urn gurgling away. An extra is stirring powdered creamer into their cupful.

    A rough circle of battered, metal folding chairs, mismatched colors.

     

    Extras occupying the chairs, older, bookish clothing, both people and clothes a touch shabby at the edges.

    Protagonist: stands, “Hello, my name is Jeff, and I am addicted to the printed word”

    Unison reply: “good morning Jeff, you are welcome here”. 

    Fade to next.

  15. 15.

    jeffreyw

    He woke to a furious fusillade of small arms fire.  A young private crawled over and grabbed him by the collar, shouting “Sarge! We gotta get outta here!”.  He should have listened.

  20. 20.

    Big R

    @BGinCHI: I took a few liberties with terms but this is a legit description of my life since the pandemic started, so, you know, call me, Hollywood!

  22. 22.

    oldgold

    It was a dark and stormy night. Norm was searching for the TV remote. Lightening struck the house as he lifted the couch cushion and spied a copy of the Kama Sutra.

  23. 23.

    dexwood

    I’ve always imagined a movie about Frank Hamilton Cushing, the anthropologist who studied the Zuni people. He was said to have become a Zuni war captain, a position granted only to those who killed the enemy in battle. The opening scene has him seated on the floor to share the communal family meal served in bowls all shared. Forks and spoons were not used. Bread was dipped into the bowls and the chile and beans were eaten that way. Cushing asked for a spoon and the Zuni woman remembered one her child often played with. She found it on the floor, licked it clean, handed it to him.

  26. 26.

    piratedan

    “he was mad, mad at his friends, mad at his enemies and mad that his country was apparently rife with idiots, bigots and assholes”

    It was a dark and stormy night, but when the sun came up, the birds chirped happily and the number of bodies on the lawn numbered eight.

  27. 27.

    mrmoshpotato

    With the help of a German bounty hunter, a freed slave sets out to rescue his wife from a brutal Mississippi plantation owner.

    What movie is this?

  29. 29.

    Almost Retired

    She was a quiet Slavic girl in a small Slovenian hamlet nurturing dreams of a life of glamour on the other side of the Alps.  She unexpectedly finds fame and fortune with a larger than life Manhattan tycoon and politician.  She later shoots him in broad daylight on Fifth Avenue.

  32. 32.

    Layer8Problem

    A jaded network administrator for hire who operates by his own
    rules, who’s seen the best systems crushed by the worst of the
    system, sits in his dingy office pouring his fourth double
    Laphroaig of the afternoon. In walks a gorgeous client with
    short blue hair, those little rectangular dark glasses, great
    gams, and the hint of a Russian accent, who offers him $500.00 an
    hour plus expenses to get her brother out of a shady Saint Petersburg research agency and possibly save the world.

    No, it most certainly is not a Mary Sue, why are you asking?

  35. 35.

    NotMax

    “It was a dark and stormy night. And that was the least of Kathy’s problems.”

    “Small World. Team of astronauts explore new planet and discover they’re progressively getting younger.”

    “James pressed the Start button on the microwave, tapping one foot while impatiently waiting for the telltale ding. ‘Fish fingers again,’ he bellowed. What’s up with these damn smart appliances anyway?”

    Partially off topic:

    Threw on a film based on a YA novel found on Prime the other day as innocuous pastime, The House of Tomorrow. Sweet without being treacly, weaknesses in execution are there but not blatant enough to be offputting. Also too, Ellen Burstyn.

  39. 39.

    Omnes Omnibus

    An unhappy nursing student making ends meet working in a grocery story decides to seek a new path in life and takes up goat herding.

  40. 40.

    p.a.

    Janitor in a US Senator’s home office lurks outside a home listening to a band practice in the basement, talks himself into being the singer/songwriter of the band, with the guitarist a victim of parental, sexual abuse, the guitarist’s half-brother the bassist, and a drummer who documents his elder brother’s schizophrenia thru painting.  The band achieves moderate success for about a decade as well as more-than-moderate musical influence, despite each members’ alcohol, drug, and self-sabotage pathologies.

     

    Do you know this band?

  41. 41.

    Jay

    Disposable worker goes Rambo with store inventory to keep his coworkers free from hordes of roaming Covidiots.

  43. 43.

    Omnes Omnibus

    Recluse build army of crows and tries to take of world.  Is defeated by his true love, a cancer survivor, and her hulking associate named Steve.

  46. 46.

    NotMax

    @Not Max

    Edited for clarity.

    “Small World. Team of astronauts crash land on a distant uncharted planet and discover they’re progressively getting younger.”

  51. 51.

    Jay

    @Omnes Omnibus:

    I think you own both,

    possibly even goat stripping or goat herder stripping,

    a good lawyer, ( not a Jackal), but somebody like Rudi or Sidney could try to make the case,….\\

  55. 55.

    hitchhiker

    my life under social distancing (close to reality):

    Grandmother of twins born during the pandemic invents entirely new system of parental support, based on Rumi quotes and food-as-entertainment.

    film I’d like to see (I’d watch this over and over):

    All members of corrupt political family indicted, tried, and convicted. Ill-gotten fortune distributed to wrongfully convicted persons by furious juries.

    unnamed living person:

    Obscure blogger wins lottery and funds an endowment for care of abandoned Maine coons.

  60. 60.

    billcinsd

    @p.a.: It’s clearly The Replacements. Paul Westerberg is the Janitor; Bobby Stinson the guitarist, Tommy Stinson the bassist; Chris Mars drummer

  65. 65.

    Ceci n est pas mon nym

    My life: Retired government employee enjoying what he thinks is the permanent life of leisure, is contacted by former colleagues to help in a new project. With savings dwindling and unexpected expenses mounting, he agrees, thinking he knows what he’s getting into. He’s mistaken.

  67. 67.

    Steeplejack

    @Omnes Omnibus:

    Well, maybe we could do heartwarming. ? Do you still talk to Lauren at Hallmark?

    “A ringworm outbreak brings the spunky local veterinarian to his lonely pastures.”

  68. 68.

    Argiope

    @Omnes Omnibus:

    @Steeplejack:

    After repeatedly battling and eventually vanquishing the genetically modified Killer Man-Eating Goats, the young man decides that nursing may not be so bad after all and takes his damn fucking boards already, passing with flying colors, and launches a long and fulfilling career. Perhaps in research rather than direct patient care, because the whole genetic modification thing was….intriguing.

    Hey, some of us still believe, and some of us are nurses.  Hearts, warmed!  You’re welcome.

  70. 70.

    NotMax

    @Argiope

    the young man decides that nursing may not be so bad after all and takes his damn fucking boards already, passing with flying colors, and launches a long and fulfilling career

    Back to the Suture?

    ;)

  72. 72.

    The Dangerman

    Disgraced former president goes golfing in threatening weather. Even in in the middle of a monster storm, he’s having the round of his life. He 3 putts the last hole, shakes his fist, and is struck down by lightning*.

    I call it Cad Be Shocked.

    * I so love a happy ending.

  78. 78.

    NotMax

    @Argiope

    Have it on good authority from someone who once worked in a video rental shop with an adults only back room that there does exist a XXX knock-off titled Romancing the Bone.

    (Not snark.)

  80. 80.

    schrodingers_cat

     

    – A film you’d like to see;

    A young Muslim lawyer successfully defends the aging leader of the Indian National Congress from the charges of sedition in British India. (The Mumbai based lawyer went on to become the founder of independent Pakistan)

    – any number of stories from the Mahabharat

    Yayati (themes of life, death, eternal youth based on V. S. Khandekar’s Jnanpeeth award winning novel by the same name)

    Mahabharat from the POV of the women of Mahabharat, Gandhari, Kunti and Draupadi

    I would also like major events in Indian history given a mature treatment on film without chest thumping jingoism and superfluous romance, song and dance.

  83. 83.

    JaySinWa

    I had a weird thought tonight and was wondering how to pitch it as a research idea for David Anderson.

    So I’ll try it as a documentary (don’t all snore at once)

    The current medical and media response to off label ineffective COVID treatments seems different from previous common issues, like demands for antibiotics for viral infections). Why is that? There seems to be much more pushback by doctors, hospitals and media. In the past patient demand would often be enough for doctors to give in even knowing it wasn’t effective. What forces are making the responses different?

    You could even pitch it with big pharma conspiracy theory hooks.

  86. 86.

    Another Scott

    Ellie’s hate for the foxes was all-consuming – and then the pandemic came.

    Cheers,
    Scott.

  87. 87.

    PJ

    @PJ: ​

    I didn’t mean to be so negative about your comment.  I tried to edit this but WP defeated me. Anyway, here’s my version of that logline:

    In a Minneapolis basement, four juvenile delinquents, without a high school diploma or driver’s license among them, but holding an ace of a budding brilliant songwriter, erraticly stumble towards the thing they desire and fear most – rock and roll success – while their personal demons and skill at self-sabotage threaten to derail everything.

  89. 89.

    Betsy

    A few hours before the local pop-up protest, the new city council person was bleaching the groceries over a washbasin by the garage, while simultaneously speakerphoning the public Works Director and police chief about last-minute plans for crowd control, and swatting mosquitoes with a soapy hand. Thank goodness, the chief of police was an intelligent man.

    Tragically, just a few weeks later the friendly, kind mayor who addressed the crowd and marched a short way with them would be dead of Covid.  What would happen to the little town  under a new  mayor who was corrupt, power-hungry, and fearful of ideas he couldn’t understand?

  97. 97.

    RSA

    I won’t give my own life story, but I’ll offer one that I think is widely relevant:

    20-something X graduates from college, works from parents’ home, readies self for emergence into the adult world…

    and here the plots diverge. X’s parents undergo an acrimonious divorce, with X mediating. X is catfished and works to turn the tables on his fake paramour. X finds solace in an online community that turns out to be a cult.

    Hmm.  Not great—too much like the real world, I’m thinking.

  98. 98.

    Poe Larity

    A group of animals engineer a complex caper involving the heist of a magical mustard bottle from a cranky old man.

  99. 99.

    Argiope

    OK, bear with me…. I think Disney should do an animated musical centered on hardworking blue collar southern or western white people.  Maybe Lin-Manuel could score it.  There could be heartfelt lessons built in about why the stars and bars is always a poor choice compared to the stars and stripes, and about how confident people welcome immigrants and don’t reject them. It would be a hit, allow some cultural pride, create some positive regard from the broader society (action figures! Merchandising!), and maybe then some of those folks would stop trying to overthrow democracy because The Grievance would be turned down a few notches.

    Damn, who am I kidding…this would immediately be rejected as some form of CRT and boycotts would commence.  Still, the soundtrack could be catchy.  Moar banjo!  Or cowbell, depending.

    Argiope, +2

  100. 100.

    pat

    Old retired folks sit at home watching Netflix and reading BJ because of a raging pandemic….

    Not sure where this goes from here.

  101. 101.

    JaySinWa

    @RSA: Sounds like an MRA coming of age and going on to  Q conversion story. Throw in a failed PUA training leading to the catfish and you might even have a prequel (failed marriage intervention) and a trilogy PUA/Catfish, MRA induction, Q conversion. You have the makings of a Hobbit/ LOTR series there.

  102. 102.

    Ben Cisco

    Love In The Time Of COVID

    Widower and divorcee find each other after 40 years apart and discover their love for each other. Then a mysterious epidemic threatens to separate them again…

    *based on a true story

  120. 120.

    JaySinWa

    @Ken: Yes there are plenty of individual stories to tell.

    I was looking at the overarching one that has a larger group response that I don’t remember seeing before. What forces trigger that? Can it be quantified and then explained? Economics (scarce resources)? Ethics (I kid)? Scale of the epidemic? Big Pharma losing control of the narrative to disinformation leading to industry production and supply problems (the conspiracy click bait hook)?

  122. 122.

    JaySinWa

    @Ken: So this Doctor somehow manages to get into the information channel and help direct it to counter disinformation as opposed to its normal marketing function?

    Maybe we could work with that

    ETA we might have to add radioactive spiders or something to give him the power he needs to redirect the info channel. Wait, mind control. yeah that’s the ticket.

  126. 126.

    Pete Downunder

    I have a scene in search of a movie:
    Bedroom interior evening:
    Wife: That handsome young pool boy is doing a great job
    Husband: I’d be less suspicious if we had a pool

  127. 127.

    Scamp Dog

    Late 50’s guy goes to a wedding, charms mother of bride by congratulating her on her daughter’s wedding in Mandarin. She finds him on Facebook, then Covid hits.

  128. 128.

    James E Powell

    This reminds of the opening scenes of The Player – and several similar scenes throughout the film – where people are making movies pitches. A running gag is that they all try to work Julia Roberts into the pitch – she was the It Girl when the film was made.

    For a while after seeing it my friends and I would make movie pitches to each other in imitation. Love that movie.

  133. 133.

    Anotherlurker

    Vann was always a hustler.  He made his first million selling used cardboard boxes as condos, in San Francisco.

    However, while on a road trip, he pulled into a truck stop to empty his urine filled Gatorade bottle.  As he was about pour out the contents, a MAGA hatted individual asked him if he would like to sell the contents.

    A light went on in his brain.

    The rest is business history.

  134. 134.

    CaseyL

    It’ll be interesting to see if any good movies come out where Covid is a necessary part of the plot arc.

    Not a romance, not where “the beloved died too soon” is already a common plot point.

    Imagine any movie where One Person is the Key to Everything (a Bourne-type suspense thriller)… only that Essential Person gets Covid and dies.  How does the plotline, not to mention the other characters, regroup?

    Or treat it as a comedy:  How can criminal masterminds run a secret plot if they can’t meet in person?

  136. 136.

    JaySinWa

    @CaseyL: I read some speculation about how series production would treat COVID to try and protect rerun values. The thinking was that masking and distancing would timestamp reruns in a way that would make them less timeless.
    The longer this hangs on the bigger the memory hole has to be. Will there be more value in COVID reruns or less?

    Obviously there will be some value as a view into the past but at some point (hopefully) it will be in the past and not a pleasant historical view.

  137. 137.

    CaseyL

    @JaySinWa:  I understand the reasoning, but… just about anything can timestamp a movie. Hairstyles.  Clothing.  There’s a whole generation of movies set against the backdrop of WWII, that people keep watching.

    If I see a movie purported to be set “in the third decade of the 21st Century,” and no one’s wearing a mask, it’ll have the opposite effect: I’ll spend most of the movie wondering why no one’s wearing a mask.  It’ll look insane to me.

  138. 138.

    JaySinWa

    @CaseyL: Yes. But it is a calculation. At first will this just be a blip and only be a few months? It drags on but there are large segments that are not participating, is that positive or negative in residual value? Do we end up adopting masking during outbreaks long term? How do other cultures deal with it cinematically? From what little I am seeing the very few COVID portrayals indicate the bets are on memory holing this.

  139. 139.

    La Nonna

    A lefty rad couple, wife worked legit while hubby sold pharma substances, in many cases for outsider art from the NYC neighborhood.  Turning 55 they realize best way to liquidate the enormous collection is to increase its value by bumping off some artists, in artistic ways.

  140. 140.

    Felanius Kootea

    Movie I’d like to see: “A small group of zombies descend on the Texas legislature and begin to feast. The legislators wake up the next morning reborn as democratic socialists and the zombies are all decomposed.”

  142. 142.

    Comrade Colette

    @Felanius Kootea: I like it! But –

    “A small group of zombies descend on the Texas legislature and begin to feast. The legislators wake up the next morning reborn as democratic socialists and the zombies are all decomposed move on to Oklahoma, Kansas, Missouri, Arkansas, Kentucky …”

    Hey, a girl can dream.

  143. 143.

    OzarkHillbilly

    The alarm went off, loud and cacophonous in his ear, he punched it, rolled over and went back to sleep.

  144. 144.

    Czar Chasm

    1.  While the plague threatens to overwhelm his county’s program for at-risk youth, a man with beautiful king hair must keep his family safe from both the plague and the hostile forest in which they live.  (My autocorrect changed “long” to “king”, and I decided to keep it)
    2. A submersible crew explores the oceans of a planet recently colonized by humans, but all may not be as it seems.  (This is a 4-5 seasons/long TV or podcast series I’ve been allowing to stew for the past decade)
    3. Two rival billionaire owners of professional wrestling companies realize that competition is a very attractive trait for each other: their desperate attempts to keep their passion aflame burns down the entire industry.
  145. 145.

    JCNZ

    A film I’d like to see…

    “Barcelona”

    Logline. How Rick got to Casablanca.

    He ran guns to Abyssinia, fought in the Spanish Civil War (where he met Sam), and can’t go back to America for some reason (“I like to think it’s because you killed a man. It appeals to the romantic in me,” says Louis). Lot of material to work with.

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