First, the soundtrack:
I had a weird dream this morning. It wasn’t as weird as that dream I told y’all about some years back, which was apparently the result of taking a prescription drug to help me quit smoking.
That time, I dreamt I was a passenger in a car that was being driven by several hens (three or four perched on the wheel to shift their weight and steer, two stationed on the floor to work the gas and brake pedals, and one in charge of the gear shift).
But today’s dream, while not quite that weird, also involved riding in a car. There was no poultry present, but I was the driver, and scandal-besieged Prime Minister Boris Johnson was my passenger.
The circumstances were murky as is often the case in dreams. I was in our beat-up Mazda MX5 two-seat convertible, and for some reason, I had agreed to drive Johnson to an event some distance away, even though I can’t stand the sight of the corrupt buffoon.
He was all dressed up in tail coat and carried a fancy hat, while I was in my usual grungy attire. He tried to make small talk during the trip, but the roar of the wind drowned out everything he said, a small mercy.
We finally arrived at an ornate stone church, and Johnson departed wordlessly to join the event in progress. Riding in a car with the top down had turned our respective hairdos into fright wigs, so Johnson didn’t even have to tousle his mop to maintain his bizarre messy hair affectation.
I rooted through my purse for a comb and angrily detangled my hair in the driveway before setting off for home, fuming because Johnson hadn’t offered to reimburse me for fuel nor even thanked me for my trouble.
I have no idea what this means, but I sort of blame Tony Jay.
ETA: WaPo phone alert says former Trump White House counsel Pat Cipollone will testify on Friday in response to a January 6th committee subpoena.
Time to clear the calendar for another edition of must-see TV. (Never mind about TV — it’s a closed-door hearing that will be videotaped, but they don’t say if/when we’ll get to see it.)
I think it means it’s time to re-read the Sandman books.
Here’s another version for your soundtrack:
Sweet Dreams Are Made of seven Nation Army
Ah yes, the chantrix. God, the dreams were spectacular! Better than acid. I wanted to get a refill on the scrip just so I could keep having those dreams.
Here of late, I’ve been having some weird dreams too. I think it’s a symptom of sleep deprivation.
You need to lay off the Muppet clips before bed.
Def. has Tony Jay’s fingerprints all over it.
Whether you need to thank or shake your fist at Tony Jay remains a point of debate. Good times! On to discuss wither driving hens or BoJo make the better passenger.
Just updated the post to note that Patsy Baloney is testifying before the January 6th committee on Friday. Honest to Christ, I don’t know how I’m supposed to get any work done…
@Betty Cracker: Here’s a little secret: nobody gets any work done.
That dream was totally a scene from a Muppet movie. I can see Kermit flailing now.
Who am I to disagree.
Gin & Tonic
@different-church-lady: Shit, I get paid to not work. Pretty sweet.
“I dreamt I was a passenger in a car that was being driven by several hens (three or four perched on the wheel to shift their weight and steer, two stationed on the floor to work the gas and brake pedals, and one in charge of the gear shift).”
That wasnt a dream! It was a repressed memory
@Betty Cracker: Is that scheduled to be televised? Risky.
@Betty Cracker: Patsy Baloney! Love it.
He’s doing a transcribed interview, not televised. Not sure if he’ll be video recorded or not…
Gin & Tonic
@Betty Cracker: Laying down a marker that he maintains the omertà.
@Kristine: Could have been inspired by a forgotten Muppets clip, but it was my personal hens driving in the dream. And they were surprisingly competent!
I still crack up at @PatsyBaloneyHat. Although his new one is even better: @CyborgSlavesOfPopehat.
When my friend Ed hears about a weird dream from someone, he invariably says, “You were probably just thirsty.” I don’t know what it means, but I kinda like it.
I see what you did there.
@Betty Cracker: Which Patsy Baloney is it going to be?
@Gin & Tonic: I agree. He’s a skilled BS artist, as anyone who watched the first impeachment knows.
@japa21: Oh, maybe not, upon checking the phone alert again. It just says he’s testifying Friday, not that it’ll be televised. (Never mind!)
Okay, as I mentioned at the time, a few nights ago I dreamed that Bill Barr redid my bathroom. It was now a strange stainless-steel construction that seemed to have a shower but had no obvious toilet. I kept asking him, “Where are we supposed to defecate?” He had no good answer.
BARR: “On the Constitution, like the rest of us.”
@OzarkHillbilly: I quit cold turkey (34 years ago), and then did some smoking cessation groups with the person who ran my group (a nurse dedicated to smoking cessation; she became a friend). As other tools became available, esp. chantix, I wondered if I would have used any of them, and I suspect not. I mean, I HATED the process of quitting (2-3 packs/day to nothing is serious withdrawal), but oddly enough, that was its own reinforcement: It sucked so much I knew I wouldn’t want to go through it again. It does seem to help other people, though, so I’m glad it’s available!
Or the movie Chicken Run. Obviously the hens hijacked a getaway car.
Damn you, DCL!
I prefer the Marilyn Manson cover of “Sweet Dreams”
The Post published a nice piece on Annie Lennox just last week.
@Baud: You’ve got to get up pret-ty earl-y in the morning to see me going to sleep.
@Baud: This tops any comment that I was preparing to make about Tony Jay.
I was reminded of that stop-motion movie some years ago about chickens plotting their escape from the chicken pot pie factory.
@Gin & Tonic: It’s always a possibility, but I think he wouldn’t mind being live on TV if he was going to do that. The closed interview at least hints at the possibility that he’s going to say something that would prompt Trump to summon a mob to murder him if he were able to read.
Are there such things as normal dreams?
@Baud: I cued you up to repeat your bon mot of the other day about his pants.
@narya: Chantix helped me! It was still hard, but doable. I think it was about 10 years ago when I quit. If our archives were working, I could verify the timeframe with that dream post.
Dorothy A. Winsor
We’ll have to see if Trump declares Patsy was just a coffee boy
@narya: If not for chantix, I’d probably be dead now. I had tried quitting for 20+ years and hadn’t managed it. My last year + I smoked 4 cigarettes a day, and could.not.let.go.of.them. I had a 3 month scrip of chantix and after 2 months was still smoking those same damned 4 cigs a day. That 3rd month, I knew it was do or die and I managed to finally do it.
I am addicted to them, always will be. If tomorrow I am diagnosed with stage 4 liver cancer, the first thing I’m gonna do is light up.
Given even the faintest likelihood of Deja Vu being an actual thing, I’d steer well clear of drunkenly buying a raffle ticket from any Celebrity Carpool charities if I were you.
Just in case.
I prefer to keep my material fresh.
Jim, Foolish Literalist
Live and on TeeVee? damn, that was fast. I think the whole strategy of “we know what people have said you said and did, you might want to get your own version out there” has been dern effective. And probably wouldn’t have worked if McCarthy (and some say trump behind him but I don’t remember that in real time) hadn’t been so ham-fisted in his attempted appointments
@Jim, Foolish Literalist: No — I made that assumption, but Friday is the day the committee will videotape the testimony. My bad!
@narya: Without chantix I’d probably be dead now. My last year of smoking I had 4 cigs a day, and couldn’t let go of them. I had a 3 month scrip for the chantix and after 2 months I was still smoking 4 cigs a day. That 3rd month was do or die, so I finally did it.
But if tomorrow I am diagnosed with stage 4 liver cancer, the first thing I’m gonna do is light up.
At least 31 ministers and aids have resigned from the British Government – don’t think we can blame Tony Jay for that.
Perhaps our world is about to stop electing RW idiots into positions of power – not before time – but it is nice to get some good political news for a change – regardless of country.
@Betty Cracker:Patsy Baloney sounds like the leader of a mafia made up of 3rd grade girls from the 1950s.
I quit cold turkey and it was rough. As Louise Belcher said about addictions, when you dance with the bear you can’t stop until the bear wants to stop.
Jim, Foolish Literalist
@Betty Cracker: still, gets him on record, and I doubt they’ve agreed to keep that testimony secret, and they’ve had a year and thousands of hours of questions and answers (that he doesn’t know about) to prepare their questions for him. Not that he’s not smart and won’t be cagey and have convenient lapses of memory….
Oh, and BTW.
There are apparently a coven of remaining Ministers waiting for Flobby to return so they can tell him to resign. They include Nadhim Zahawi, who he was just last night bullied into making Chancellor.
OTOH, when asked in a committee about calling a surprise General Election to take his future out of MPs hands and into those of the General Public, Flobalob responded – “people do not want an election… but… an election might be justified if people were trying to block a government with a “substantial mandate from the electorate”.
So he’s threatening them. Back the fuck off or I put all of your jobs out for tender.
Hey, I’ll take the credit!
While we were on vacation in Maryland, we ate at a Silver Diner where they were playing a mix of random 80s music and on came the early Eurythmics tune “Love Is A Stranger”, and we both wondered aloud why it wasn’t a better-remembered hit, because, man, that song was a banger.
@OzarkHillbilly: and when you get to Heaven you can have a cigarette 9 nine miles long
Jim, Foolish Literalist
Ha! just had that lyric going through my head. My sister, who’s never smoked, and orders vodka maybe once a year, likes to sing that song with gusto
I’m watching Boris Johnson being questioned…Flobalob indeed..so much uh er um. It’s a thing of beauty to watch him flop in public.
When I was a small child with a fever I dreamt about watching a tennis match where the players were police officers in uniform eating PBJ sandwiches throughout the game. I have never forgotten that.
@waspuppet: Nah. I think it means that they don’t know exactly what he’s going to say, can’t script it and can’t guarantee he won’t just lie out of his ass and ‘exonerate’ Trump, and they don’t want that on TV.
My guess is that he’ll testify and agree to the bad stuff, say “I don’t know” a lot, and flatly deny where he has plausible deniability to do so. He’ll probably do quite a bit of “I told Trump that something was possibly illegal and he didn’t do it.” Again, not something the committee wants directly on TV if he’s not a friendly witness, and he’s not.
It’s true. If anyone watching this is wondering how he got the reputation for being a wonderful and charismatic speaker, it boils down to the crappy nature of our News Media, how easily impressed they are by someone doing a tacky Stephen Fry impression, and the fact that they really, really, really wanted him to be successful, because HEADLINE MACHINE.,
The fact that he was always a lying sack of shit whose only priority has always been “What’s in it for me?” is neither here nor there to the people who relentlessly made up shit about Corbyn. He was always chummy with them and made them laugh, what more does a political titan possibly need?
@Tony Jay: That sure sounds familiar… Here’s hoping y’all finally see that crooked sumbitch drop-kicked across the Thames!
I want to be driven to a fried chicken joint now. Not Homophobes-fil-A because fuck them, but I’m not picky.
It’ll either be over in the next few hours or he’ll double-cross them and use his press conference to call a General Election and fuck them over.
I’m going to enjoy ranting about this.
I’m loving the imagery! Great dream ;-).
Looking at all the ministers resigning from his cabinet, I wonder how much time Boris Johnson has left as prime minister. And the newly appointed chancellor (appointed yesterday, I believe) is among the people telling him to step down. I’ve thought he was done before though, so let’s see if he is as slippery as he seems.
I’ve never been able to take Percocet without getting weird opiate “Dragon Dreams”. The piece de resistance was the one where my two then-young daughters and I were enjoying wading in White Lake, NC, when a huge albino alligator raised up out of the lake about 100 feet away from us and immediately began chasing toward us. The dream ended before I found out whether the gator caught us or not.
I could never become addicted to opiates – for all the painkilling benefits, they tend to make me very nauseous, very similar to bad sea-sickness from a rocking boat heaving on the waves. When I took them briefly immediately following my two respective knee replacements, I ditched them very quickly because toughing it out was less uncomfortable.
And another delegation has shown up to tell Bloody Stupid Johnson to take a hike.
At this rate he’s gone in a few hours
ETA the delegation of ministers includes Grant Shapps so that’s at least 3 people
KayInMD (formerly Kay (not the front-pager))
Wow, sounds a lot like the US press and a certain ex-President I can think of… And they’re doing everything they can to get him (or his mini-me, the FL Governor) back in office.
@Tony Jay: If Johnson goes, what fresh nightmare of a Tory is the UK stuck with?
Yeah, I took Chantix. The dreams were trippy but it changed my personality and made me mean. Very disturbing. I think it’s been pulled off the market. I think I remember reading it became associated with a risk of self-harm.
I was able to quit on my own about a year later. Best thing I ever did for my health!
@Tony Jay: And I will enjoy reading the rant!
Some of them want to abuse you.
Some of them want to be abused…
@Pennsylvanian: We had a neighbor who also had to quit taking Chantix because he had disturbing side effects. Hubby and I both had bizarre dreams but no problems. Glad you were able to quit!
Hee. QOTD ( so far ) on Johnson’s slide to ruin
And I’m going to enjoy reading that rant.
JOEL: The dream is always the same.
Instead of going home,
I go to the neighbors’.
I ring, but nobody answers.
The door is open, so I go inside.
I’m looking around for the people,
but nobody seems to be there.
I hear the shower running…
…so I go upstairs
to see what’s what….
Sorry, Betty, the BoJo dream sounds like a drag, but the chicken dream sounds all kinds of awesome.
@jefft452: Dreamwalking – linving the experience through an alternate universe version of herself.
Chicken is my pilot.
50% wrong turns. But the chicken doesn’t give a cluck.
@Kristine: Gonzo in the backseat with his feet up. The chicks love him , ya know!