Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

We cannot abandon the truth and remain a free nation.

Democracy cannot function without a free press.

Perhaps you mistook them for somebody who gives a damn.

Balloon Juice, where there is always someone who will say you’re doing it wrong.

He wakes up lying, and he lies all day.

Republican also-rans: four mules fighting over a turnip.

Hell hath no fury like a farmer bankrupted.

Since when do we limit our critiques to things we could do better ourselves?

Motto for the House: Flip 5 and lose none.

President Musk and Trump are both poorly raised, coddled 8 year old boys.

Teach a man to fish, and he’ll sit in a boat all day drinking beer.

Too often we hand the biggest microphones to the cynics and the critics who delight in declaring failure.

“Can i answer the question? No you can not!”

Do we throw up our hands or do we roll up our sleeves? (hint, door #2)

Sadly, there is no cure for stupid.

A thin legal pretext to veneer over their personal religious and political desires.

Republicans: “Abortion is murder but you can take a bus to get one.” Easy peasy.

the 10% who apparently lack object permanence

The press swings at every pitch, we don’t have to.

Impressively dumb. Congratulations.

The gop is a fucking disgrace.

The real work of an opposition party is to oppose.

Mediocre white men think RFK Jr’s pathetic midlife crisis is inspirational. The bar is set so low for them, it’s subterranean.

I have other things to bitch about but those will have to wait.

You are here: Home / Popular Culture / KULCHA! / Late Night Open Thread: Historical Fantasy, Fun for the Whole Family

Late Night Open Thread: Historical Fantasy, Fun for the Whole Family

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The ‘American Conservative’ dreaming of a world where only a small fraction of upper-class men were considered citizens… and the normal people making fun of his Rome-anticism:


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36Comments

  3. 3.

    NotMax

    And of course this happened.

    48 hours before flying to NYC, stubbed a big toe really, really, really hard. Smeared some smurf jelly on and tightly taped the ever lovin’ heck out of it so now can (gingerly) do a simulation of walking without wincing, as long as take small steps. Ever so slightly swollen (I think; with my feet that’s always a coin toss) but no discoloration yet so may be closer to what passes for normal by Tuesday evening. Had to be a toe on the foot of the good leg, natch.

    /TMI

  5. 5.

    scav

    Those Legionnaires spent a fair bit of time building public works & infrastructure (roads anyone?)

  7. 7.

    Bruce K in ATH-GR

    As John Scalzi put it, these are the guys who’d get turned into Objectivist Jerky by the pitiless sociopaths who are actually equipped to live in the world they want to create.

  8. 8.

    eclare

    @NotMax:   Oh I hope your toe feels better!

    Always use ice.  Put some ice or a bag of frozen peas on it for fifteen minutes as you elevate it.  Seriously, ice works wonders.

  9. 9.

    piratedan

    So Micah seems to think identured military servitude is the way to… maybe he can get back to us after he served a hitch.

  10. 10.

    Amir Khalid

    Harrumph.

    My New Guitar Day has suddenly turned into a No Guitar Day. I had ordered what I thought was a Les Paul type instrument with a set neck i.e. a neck glued to the guitar body, as in all the YouTube reviews I’ve seen. The guitar that arrived this morning has a bolt-on neck. The guitar is going back to the vendor tomorrow.

    I am angry.

  12. 12.

    Splitting Image

    @piratedan:

    So Micah seems to think identured military servitude is the way to… maybe he can get back to us after he served a hitch.

    Indentured military servitude is the first step to re-introducing every other kind of indentured servitude. If they left it at only the military being able to do it, that would amount to giving the state a monopoly on the practice. And that would be wrong. Heaven knows libertarians are nothing if not ethical.

    It’s funny. This guy’s tweet is an exact mirror of the other guy asking people to move to red states. Both of them are talking about how great it would be for other people to do something they would never bother to do themselves, but they would benefit from if a bunch of suckers were to do it instead.

  14. 14.

    Baud

    My historical fantasy is to be on board the first European ship that “discovered” Tahiti.

  16. 16.

    raven

    @NotMax: In 1990 on my second trip to the Hawaii I broke a toe body surfing at Makapuu. I stayed with my sis in LA for a couple of days and broke one on the other foot on her couch. Ice smish. It helps but it still won’t replace time. My bride is in week one of a 6-8 week sentence in a walking boot right now.

  17. 17.

    grandmaBear

    @raven: I wish her good luck. I was told 6-8 weeks after I broke my fibula last February. I didn’t get the boot off for 3 1/2 months. My old bones took longer to heal than originally expected.

  18. 18.

    mrmoshpotato

    @Splitting Image:

    It’s funny. This guy’s tweet is an exact mirror of the other guy asking people to move to red states. Both of them are talking about how great it would be for other people to do something they would never bother to do themselves, but they would benefit from if a bunch of suckers were to do it instead. 

    Hahaha!  Yup!

    Oh?  You want that?  You first!

    What?!  No!  I meant other people go do that!

  19. 19.

    raven

    @grandmaBear: Thanks. Yea, this is a small fracture in her foot so we’re hoping. She broke her fibula about 15 years ago and THAT was a bitch. We’re both retired and she can get up to her studio but the garden is going to be a big problem. She got hurt walking Artie and now long walks are out because I can’t go very far either!

  22. 22.

    Barbara

    This is so  ahistorical it beggars belief.  Roman citizen soldiers were more likely to lose rather than gain land from being in the military.

  23. 23.

    eversor

    @lgerard:

    Church!  Not a joke at all either.  But TAC is nothing but graduates of Christian colleges right now (mostly Hillsdale) bleeting out articles about how Christianity is the true west and also required for civilization, screaming for a mix of Franco/Orban, how Democracy destroyed traditional gender and sexual values and is thus really really bad, and how rural peoples should be in charge of everything because they are more in love with Jesus than the rest of the nation.

    Micah is pretty tame compared to say Dreher or Declan.  But they all churn out articles that say “Slavery and Native American genocide may seem bad but since they got Christianity out of it actually they were really really good because now they have Jesus.  In the end, it’s Christianity that counts.”

    Spoiler alert for those who don’t follow the shit show that is Christianity, all these assholes live in places like Northern Virginia or outside of NYC and not a damn one of them would last a night in the woods.

    Also Richardson and Andrews love to rant about how women should just spend all their time at home and not work, because Jesus, despite both of them being editors in their day job!  But that’s OK, because they are working for Jesus.

  25. 25.

    Subsole

    I would pay good, folding American dollerydoos to watch this guy muck stalls and slop hogs for a month. Probably lose a finger the first time he took his eye off the brood sow.

    Also, this dipstick genuinely does not understand that back then farmers were the great-unwashed condo-paying corporate drones, does he.

  26. 26.

    Subsole

    Also, too: is it really so much to ask that these people just fuck off to a monastery and stop inflicting their insecurities on the rest of us?

    Like, dude, I am genuinely sorry your parents never taught you that men can work with their minds as well as their hands. I am sorry that you don’t have more faith in your dick. Truly. But y’all need to go see a therapist and stop trying to collapse civilization over it.

  31. 31.

    eversor

    @Subsole:

    It has zero to do with any of that, he’s Christian.   All of TACs articles are by upper middle class Christians screaming about modernity because it is less religious.  Followed up by a healthy dose of “look at these noble rural hicks over there, they still love Jesus and traditional biblical gender roles”.

    The fit they are throwing is simple.  Middle class folk, educated folk, and professional folk aren’t Christian anymore and they hate this.  They hate that their social peers don’t Jesus.   So their solution to this is to talk up the noble proles who should get their fascism so all the rest of us get Jesus and are forced to indoctrinate our kids into the cult of the cross.

    TAC (the rag he writes for), Fox News, National Conservatism, Republicanism, Trumpism, all of it is bad because of Christianity.  That religion dominates or destroys everything it touches so no fights are winnable as long as it’s even remotely tolerated on any level at all.   If you aren’t anti Christian than you are enabling all this nonsense.  Good thing the younger generations are fleeing the church in droves and actively hostile to it.   That’s a start, but the hostility needs to grow and get much more vicious before any of our problems are fixable.   Cut out the cancer.

  32. 32.

    Yutsano

    @eversor: I’m just going to say right now that this is probably the most antithetical statement to American values I have ever heard on this blog. It also means I can’t take you seriously. ​

  33. 33.

    Damien

    @Yutsano: I’m gonna say that maybe “the power of the government should enforce our interpretation of religious doctrine” is a bit more anti-American. And if you don’t think that it’s Christianity specifically creating that problem currently, I have some crackers for you that I hear turn absolutely divine in your mouth.

    Every time this comes up people point out the good things churches do, and the rich history, community, and importance of Black churches, and I’m not going to sit and argue that every single Russian…excuse me Christian, is trying to take over this country by force in order to institute Herrenvolk fascism. Just saying that it sure seems that nationally it’s the Christians making those moves for the last fifty years.

    As someone they consider a hero once said “I don’t care what you do in private, as long as you don’t do it in the street and scare the horses.”

  34. 34.

    Paul in KY

    While on a great vacay at beach, I read Caesar’s commentary on his Gallic campaigns. Very matter-of-a-fact writing by him. Interesting how easily the Gauls could be inflamed by completely unsubstantiated rumours and thus make trouble that they and their women/kids would end up paying terribly for.

    Was also surprised by the lack of targeted assassinations aimed at Caesar.  Maybe that was considered ‘uncool’ or ‘weak’ by the Gauls. Getting rid of him sure would have helped their cause.

  35. 35.

    Bill Arnold

    @eversor:
    You are a (militantly religious atheist) bigot. (If it is not clear, I Am Not A Christian. Irrelevant. Neither are most US Christian Supremacists.)

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