Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

Do we throw up our hands or do we roll up our sleeves? (hint, door #2)

People identifying as christian while ignoring christ and his teachings is a strange thing indeed.

Republicans do not pay their debts.

Sitting here in limbo waiting for the dice to roll

If you still can’t see these things even now, maybe politics isn’t your forte and you should stop writing about it.

I swear, each month of 2025 will have its own history degree.

Also, are you sure you want people to rate your comments?

🎶 Those boots were made for mockin’ 🎵

Polls are now a reliable indicator of what corporate Republicans want us to think.

We do not need to pander to people who do not like what we stand for.

“Alexa, change the president.”

Impressively dumb. Congratulations.

Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

“Jesus paying for the sins of everyone is an insult to those who paid for their own sins.”

Thanks to your bullshit, we are now under siege.

People are weird.

They spent the last eight months firing professionals and replacing them with ideologues.

So it was an October Surprise A Day, like an Advent calendar but for crime.

This blog will pay for itself.

No Kings: Americans standing in the way of bad history saying “Oh, Fuck No!”

Only Democrats have agency, apparently.

There are no moderate republicans – only extremists and cowards.

Republicans in disarray!

SCOTUS: It’s not “bribery” unless it comes from the Bribery region of France. Otherwise, it’s merely “sparkling malfeasance”.

You are here: Home / Open Threads / Excellent Links / Late Night Night Open Thread: The *Other* World Cup “Games”

Late Night Night Open Thread: The *Other* World Cup “Games”

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From a short thread, today:

It is me, Soprani Ilbambino, president of the football in all the world across the globe. As head of the council, chair of the standing committee on programmes, chief of normalization, close friend of the House of al-Thani, laughing chair-mate of the Saudi crown prince, and ally of Kremlins and dearest leaders, it is my honor to welcome you to the World Cup in Qatar. If you would, please slide the envelope across the table under your palm, thank you.

I am here today to announce that the colorful rainbow stripes cannot be worn at the football. If you wear the colorful rainbow stripes on your armband as a player in the football, you will get a yellow card. If you wear the colorful rainbow stripes on your bucket hat as a spectator at the football, you will be stopped by the Directorate of Public Safety and your hat removed, exposing you to the pitiless Arabian sun. We must respect the host and not be racist westerners, because, as one of my colleagues recently said, a place that had “just sand and pearls, turns out to have something much more, it’s gas,” which is the reason we have all come to Qatar. So, if you would, please place the unmarked bills under the napkin…

The Qatar World Cup is 200 percent within my control as president of the football in all the world across the globe. As you can clearly read in articles 4.3, 4.31, 4.32, 4.33 and 4.34 from our annexes, circulars, guidelines and directives, no items of clothing can be worn if they are considered “offensive or indecent,” or if they represent “political, religious or personal slogans.” Therefore, under the rules, as well as the talking points given me by the sheikhs, I must forbid the Dutch and other European teams from wearing armbands that promote “OneLove.” If armbands were supposed to draw attention, we would have sold the licensing rights to them. Preferably to QatarEnergy…

As the president of the football in all the world, I am proud of the World Cup’s long association with strong governments and I salute those who used their influence to bring this event here, including those who can’t attend as they are engaged in foreign invasion, under house arrest for election corruption, or banned for life for ethical breaches. This continues our organization’s wonderful tradition of global outreach that extends from Mussolini’s Italy in 1934, to the Military Junta’s Argentina in 1978, to Putin’s Russia in 2018. So please, if you would sign the offshore agreement and have the funds transferred, half in Singapore dollars and half in South African Rand, to the Banque Pictet in Geneva, account 665777213345667894652, code name “AlltheBiscotti.” Thank you.

Reader Interactions

11Comments

  1. 1.

    Benw

    I guess history will be the judge, jury, and executive class here, but if your team won’t wear a pride armband and take a knee during whatever anthem, then what the fuck are you rooting for?

  2. 2.

    eclare

    @Benw:   FIFA has threatened to sanction any country whose team wears the band.  The US is one of the hosts for 2026.  It’s all about the $$$.

  3. 3.

    Raoul Paste

    After reading the Ukraine update every night, and after seeing how corrupt and vile other countries and institutions are, I can understand why Baud sometimes wants to be a Normie

  4. 4.

    Amir Khalid

    This World Cup is dirty, and flaunting it. If threatening to punish players for not leaving their human values behind when they step on the pitch isn’t dirty, I don’t know what is.

  6. 6.

    Parfigliano

    Saw a show the other night on the proper way to pronounce Qatar.  They said Guh-tar.  Dont know if thats right but it seems right.  The country seems to be little more than a gutter.

  7. 7.

    Alison Rose

    @Parfigliano: Yeah, when they were announced as the host, there were a bunch of people trying to explain to everyone how to say it properly, but mostly it seems like everyone’s given up and it comes out almost sounding like guitar.

  8. 8.

    tokyokie

    There’s a Qatar promo that’s run during the ad breaks, which I figure is supposed to be akin to the promos colleges get to have during football games. But at one point in the Qatar promo, there’s a shot of a military officer in mirrored glasses. He looks reminiscent of Jean Martin as the colonel heading the paratroopers in La battaglia di Algeri. Didn’t anybody tell the Qataris that’s a particularly bad look to display if you’re trying to soften the country’s international image, or were the PR hacks working for them stealing Qatari money much as FIFA has done?

  9. 9.

    HumboldtBlue

    @tokyokie:

    He looks reminiscent of Jean Martin as the colonel heading the paratroopers in La battaglia di Algeri. Didn’t anybody tell the Qataris that’s a particularly bad look to display if you’re trying to soften the country’s international image

    Not if you want to oppress, torture, exploit and dominate, that’s the blueprint.

  11. 11.

    lowtechcyclist

    @Amir Khalid: ​
     

    This World Cup is dirty, and flaunting it. If threatening to punish players for not leaving their human values behind when they step on the pitch isn’t dirty, I don’t know what is.

    This.

    And in general, fuck Qatar, fuck FIFA, and I may have to take a break from BJ until the damned-to-hell WC is over because I really hate seeing all these WC threads and being repeatedly reminded of the whole goddamned mess far too often each day. Because I don’t watch TV and consume very little in the way of mass media, this blog is the only place I go where it’s any more than background noise.

    So if you don’t see me around much between now and whenever the hell this abomination ends, that’s why.

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