Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

I have other things to bitch about but those will have to wait.

A norm that restrains only one side really is not a norm – it is a trap.

This is dead girl, live boy, a goat, two wetsuits and a dildo territory.  oh, and pink furry handcuffs.

People are complicated. Love is not.

Authoritarian republicans are opposed to freedom for the rest of us.

Lick the third rail, it tastes like chocolate!

We need to vote them all out and restore sane Democratic government.

Disagreements are healthy; personal attacks are not.

“Alexa, change the president.”

Technically true, but collectively nonsense

The truth is, these are not very bright guys, and things got out of hand.

Giving in to doom is how we fail to fight for ourselves & one another.

A tremendous foreign policy asset… to all of our adversaries.

Balloon Juice, where there is always someone who will say you’re doing it wrong.

There are no moderate republicans – only extremists and cowards.

If you still can’t see these things even now, maybe politics isn’t your forte and you should stop writing about it.

If senate republicans had any shame, they’d die of it.

People are weird.

The press swings at every pitch, we don’t have to.

… gradually, and then suddenly.

Jack Smith: “Why did you start campaigning in the middle of my investigation?!”

Republicans don’t want a speaker to lead them; they want a hostage.

When I was faster i was always behind.

Welcome to day five of every-bit-as-bad-as-you-thought-it-would-be.

You are here: Home / Open Threads / Wednesday Morning Open Thread: *Every* Day Is Hump Day

Wednesday Morning Open Thread: *Every* Day Is Hump Day

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  2. 2.

    Maxim

    I cannot believe the hippo. Those are dangerous animals and he’s just thwapping it repeatedly on the snout? There’s nothing to stop it from just climbing back out as soon as he’s gone. They need to fix that enclosure.

  3. 3.

    Jeffro

    Folks, the Biden/Harris campaign has up a tremendously funny ad full of Democratic politicians (national/state/local) endorsing Joe Biden for president.

    It starts with Cory Booker putting on aviators…Ned Lamont’s endorsement, though, is priceless!

    I saw it on Instagram and will try to find a link.  What a great way to start the day LOL

  4. 4.

    Jeffro

    also – goes without saying that you sure as shit wouldn’t catch ME slapping a hippo on the snout, holy (water) cow!

  5. 5.

    Jeffro

    Jamelle Bouie: A Gun-Filled America is a World of [even more] Fear and Alienation.

    What is a “soft target”? It is a school or a mall or a church or a gym. It is a library, a movie theater, a grocery store or anywhere people gather to live their lives. What would it mean to “harden” those targets, most of which have already been targeted at one point or another? It would mean additional police officers and armed security; metal detectors and reinforced doors designed to bar entry; heightened scrutiny for visitors and even mandatory checks for identification.

    To harden our soft targets is, in other words, to turn the entire country into an airport security line. And far from a free society, this hardened America would be a continental version of Baghdad’s Green Zone, each checkpoint or guard a visible reminder that we’ve organized our entire lives around the prospect of instant death by lethal violence. We’re already halfway there. It is normal, at many synagogues and Jewish community centers, to have armed security guards. It is normal, at many schools, to have metal detectors. It is normal to drill young children for when a shooter appears — to train first and second and third graders to run and hide or play dead.

    Either way, it is a world of fear and alienation, where people live in a state of heightened awareness, even anxiety. It is not a world of trust or hope or solidarity or any of the values we need to make democracy work as a way of life, much less a system of government

    Which might be the point for conservatives who want that world — who want, in a sense, that “polite society.” Because what will survive are hierarchy and force and the power to make others bend to your will. And if they refuse? If they insist on their right to live free of fear?  Well, that’s what the guns are for.

    I refuse, and I insist on my right – and the right of my kids and grandkids – to live free of this insanity.

  7. 7.

    Betty Cracker

    In my county, there’s an old hippo who lives at a state park that was once a roadside tourist trap. The hippo’s name is Lu, and no one would think of slapping him. When I was a child, Lu was famous for ritually spraying gawkers with shit. But now people are warned in advance to flee when he farts and starts swinging his tail like a propeller. Those who stick around soon understand the literal meaning of the phrase “when the shit hits the fan.”

  8. 8.

    Omnes Omnibus

    Santos indictment unsealed.  Seven counts of wire fraud, three counts of money laundering, one count of theft of public funds, and two counts of making materially false statements to the House of Representatives.

  9. 9.

    Baud

    @Jeffro: Did the ad include RJK, Jr. and Marianne Williamson, or did it attempt to cover up the deep divisions in the Democratic party?

  10. 10.

    O. Felix Culpa

    @Maxim:

    They need to fix that enclosure.

    QFT. Hippos are incredibly dangerous. You do not want one to go after you.

  14. 14.

    Matt McIrvin

    Mass shootings are properly understood as a form of terrorism: they don’t (in their current form) amount to a large fraction even of gun deaths, and shouldn’t be seen as a major risk of living, but their intention is to terrorize and they have outsize effect and danger because of that. Nobody wants to live in a world where terrorists are driving policy or public behavior.

    To me, this is the justification for restricting assault weapons. They’re actually not the most deadly guns by the numbers, but this should be understood as an anti-terrorism measure. To me this is also an answer for the question “why would you restrict this particular gun just because of how it looks?” which is a perennial objection to assault-weapon bans: you ban rifle X but not rifle Y even though they’re functionally similar just because rifle X looks scarier. But those aesthetics may actually be an important thing if we see this as anti-terrorism.

  15. 15.

    mali muso

    Yikes to the hippo thing.  Most dangerous animal in Africa; you do not want to FAFO with a hippo.

  16. 16.

    Jeffro

    @Baud:Did the ad include RJK, Jr. and Marianne Williamson, or did it attempt to cover up the deep divisions in the Democratic party?

    Ok, now my day is really made. =)

    Thanks Baud!

  19. 19.

    Ken

    @Omnes Omnibus: They’re just process crimes. There’s no reason at all for Santos to resign before being convicted, and arguably not even after a conviction.

    — Kevin McCarthy, practicing in front of his mirror this morning

  20. 20.

    O. Felix Culpa

    @Ken:

    They’re just process crimes.

    Are “process crimes” really a legal thing, or is it just a GOP bafflegab term of convenience obfuscation?

  25. 25.

    lowtechcyclist

    @Jeffro:

    I wonder if anyone out there still believes that an armed society is a polite society.  Not that it matters; if that justification has fallen by the wayside, they just move on to another.

  27. 27.

    M31

    a couple of people I’ve known who lived in areas where hippos live say that they absolutely are the most dangerous wild animal of all — they are always conscious of where the water is and if you get between it and them they freak out and trample you

  28. 28.

    Omnes Omnibus

    WTF happened? This post disappeared for a little while. Does Santos really have that much pull?

  31. 31.

    Betty Cracker

    @Jeffro: No-Good made a point the DeSantis people seem too cowardly and/or stupid to make more often, i.e., that DeSantis could potentially serve for eight years (pardon me, violently retching… okay, I’m back), whereas Trump would be limited to a single term. I wonder if No-Good was spooked by Trump being convicted of sexual assault yesterday.

  32. 32.

    Jeffro

    @lowtechcyclist: several pro-gun-safety groups keep trying to point out that if more guns was the answer, we ought to be the safest society in the history of the world.  Oddly enough, we aren’t.

  33. 33.

    Jackie

    She’s #1!👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻
    “Vice President Kamala Harris will deliver the commencement speech at the West Point military academy this month, the first woman to do so, a White House official told ABC News.
    Harris’s remarks at the May 27 commencement ceremony will mark her first visit to the U.S. Military Academy West Point, according to the official.”
    https://abcnews.go.com/Politics/1st-abc-harris-become-1st-woman-deliver-west/story?id=99205933

  34. 34.

    Gin & Tonic

    @M31: Not going to look it up, but aren’t there wild hippos in Colombia because some narcotraficante  thought it’d be cool to own some?

  35. 35.

    Jeffro

    @Betty Cracker: but does that count the ‘bonus’/do-over term that trumpov gets for having to put up with the Russia Russia Russia absolutely-not-a-scandal in his first term?

    (Didn’t think about THAT, did ya Bob?)

  36. 36.

    Omnes Omnibus

    @Gin & Tonic: There are.  They seem to have adapted well.
    ETA:  Would they count as an invasive species?  Or imperialists?​

  37. 37.

    M31

    @Gin & Tonic:

    yup, NPR story transcript

    “Colombia’s hippo population now tops 140. That’s a huge expansion from the original four hippos illegally brought into Colombia by Pablo Escobar in 1980.

    (SOUNDBITE OF WATER RIPPLING)”

    —

    LOL I nominate “SOUNDBITE OF WATER RIPPLING” for a rotating tag

  38. 38.

    montanareddog

    Anne Applebaum’s tweet presupposes that there could be some magic and mystery to monarchy. I give you Tom Paine. from Common Sense, in response:

    “England, since the conquest, hath known some few good monarchs, but groaned beneath a much larger number of bad ones; yet no man in his senses can say that their claim under William the Conqueror is a very honourable one. A French bastard landing with an armed banditti, and establishing himself king of England against the consent of the natives, is in plain terms a very paltry rascally original. It certainly hath no divinity in it. However, it is needless to spend much time in exposing the folly of hereditary right; if there are any so weak as to believe it, let them promiscuously worship the ass and lion, and welcome. I shall neither copy their humility, nor disturb their devotion.”

    I presume that Charles Windsor can claim descent from said bandit.

  39. 39.

    Jeffro

    Santos turned himself in btw

    Rep. George Santos, the freshman Republican congressman whose myriad falsehoods became both a scandal and a national punchline, was charged with a host of financial crimes in court papers unsealed Wednesday.

    Santos, 34, surrendered to federal authorities in the morning and is expected to appear in a federal courthouse in Central Islip, on Long Island, later Wednesday.

    Officials said he has been charged with fraud, money laundering, theft of public funds, and false statements. The congressman and his lawyer did not respond to earlier messages seeking comment.

    Santos, federal authorities said, lied to his own donors, the House of Representatives, state unemployment officials, and others, resulting in seven counts of wire fraud, three counts of money laundering, one count of theft of public funds, and two counts of lying to the House of Representatives on financial forms.

  41. 41.

    Ghost of Joe Liebling’s Dog

    @M31: That was actually a soundbite of the one and only time Steve Inskeep asked a follow-up question.

  42. 42.

    satby

    Well, since we’re speaking of lying liars I have an update on my business imitator. I put a post up clearly saying that a person was selling products under my business name without my permission and that those weren’t produced by me. His response was his name was totally different because it’s: “Skinluvvers Soaps and Lotions”, as if the fact that that’s what I sell isn’t even relevant. I replied it was still a trademark infringement, that he’d probably lose in court, and that after all the time I spent teaching and mentoring him it was unbelievable, ungrateful, and dishonest. He responded an hour ago with a 7 point bullet list saying he’s always called me his mentor, never attempted to compete where I sell (maybe because people would wonder about the name? /sb), he bought the domain name because I never did, I should have talked to him first instead of going public, and he’d see me in court. Jerk. Let him try to sue me.

  45. 45.

    Jackie

    13 charges!

    “Embattled Rep. George Santos, R-N.Y., turned himself in to federal authorities Wednesday morning as it was revealed he faces 13 charges including wire fraud, money laundering, theft of public funds, and false statements, officials said.”

    Santos was charged with:

    • Seven counts of wire fraud
    • Three counts of money laundering
    • One count of theft of public funds
    • Two counts of making materially false statements to the House of Representatives

    https://www.semafor.com/article/05/10/2023/santos-surrenders-federal-authorities

  46. 46.

    montanareddog

    @Betty Cracker:

     

    DeSantis could potentially serve for eight years (pardon me, violently retching… okay, I’m back), whereas Trump would be limited to a single term

    Assumes fealty to the constitution that has proven non-existent in Trump and his followers.

  48. 48.

    gene108

    @Gin & Tonic:

    Not going to look it up, but aren’t there wild hippos in Colombia because some narcotraficante thought it’d be cool to own some?

    Yup. It’s caused all kinds problems for people there.

  49. 49.

    Delk

    I was at an AA meeting and the guest speaker was missing an arm. TV and movies always portray AA meetings as these dreary events and most people only focus on the higher power/god shit, but drunks tell some of the best/funniest stories. When the guy started talking he had a South African accent and I was thinking it was going to be some ‘fell off a boat and got bitten by a great white’ story but it was a ‘fell off the boat and got bitten by a hippo’ story.

  50. 50.

    SFAW

    @Jeffro:

    TFG gets THREE more terms, because the World’s Biggest Witch Hunt not only zeroed out the first term of The Greatest Monarch Fuehrer President in History, but gave him an extra one, because of all he had to put up with.

    It’s right there in the Constitution, Article IX. Look it up, libtard.

  52. 52.

    HinTN

    1. the Founders did not in their drafting anticipate the rise of modern firearms, Girandoni be damned,

    Just points out the selective hypocrisy of “Originalism”, not that it will matter one whit to them what ought to be embarrassed.

  55. 55.

    UncleEbeneezer

    @Omnes Omnibus: If DOJ will charge Santos for wire fraud, it’s hard to imagine them not doing the same for Trump.  Jack Smith is already going down this road of inquiry and has gotten testimony from multiple people/orgs that told Trump there was no voter fraud in the 2020 election.  But Trump repeatedly fundraised on the Big Lie, anyways.  Trump could end up facing hundreds of wire fraud charges wire fraud is fairly easy to prove (fingers crossed).

  56. 56.

    Matt McIrvin

    @Ken: “Attempted murder… is that even a crime? Do they give out Nobel Prizes in attempted chemistry?” –Sideshow Bob

  61. 61.

    Jeffro

    @Delk: that’s awesome

    Given how vicious hippos are, dude is probably grateful he ONLY lost an arm.

    (meanwhile, that hippo’s getting razzed by his hippo friends: “ha ha Gerald, only got an arm, what a putz!” “Oooo, mighty hunter Gerald, oooo so scary!”  “Wow, a WHOLE arm, Gerald? Oooo”)  =)

  63. 63.

    Omnes Omnibus

    @UncleEbeneezer: ​
      Silverman keeps saying “Hope is not a strategy.” He is correct, but a thorough investigation and serious trial trial prep is a strategy.

  67. 67.

    satby

    @Baud: Maybe I should worry that he’d find a lawyer that might rep him, given how many shit lawyers we now know are out there thanks to tfg. But I doubt it, and I’ll not respond to him further.

  69. 69.

    Bruce K in ATH-GR

    @Jeffro: I’m just hoping that the blast damage is contained within the GOP rather than harming innumerable innocent bystanders, and that they get on with the self-immolation before they’ve successfully destroyed America.

  70. 70.

    OverTwistWillie

    The 18th Century cosplay only works with a virginal princess to sacrifice.

    They should have dumped a bunch of the fairy tale trappings, and had Charles in a suit or modern uniform riding in a limo. Any sane image consultant would work to minimize his lack of regal bearing.

    The whole event was weird and stuffy, but then Charles never had the stones to pushback against the institution (i.e. his parents), so he’ll spend his reign being publicly framed as a dope.

  71. 71.

    Ken

    @Delk: You remind me of one of the more alarming videos I’ve ever seen, of a hippo chasing a powerboat across a lake. I’m not sure which was scarier, that it was bounding through the water like it was air, or that it was catching up with the boat.

    A quick youtube “hippo chases boat” search doesn’t turn up exactly the one I remember, but plenty that are close enough. I did find the land equivalent, a moose running through chest-deep (on the moose!) snow.

  73. 73.

    sab

    @Bruce K in ATH-GR: Ohio GOP voting today on whether to put a constitutional measure on the ballot this year that would destroy our right to amend the state constitution. They are all for it. The only issue is whether to have it on the ballot in August or November.

    The backers are Right To Lifers and the gun nuts.

  74. 74.

    Jeffro

    @Bruce K in ATH-GR: yup

    As appealing as the idea is of a GOP circular firing squad is, they can’t ALL be marksmen.

    I am really liking the stories of the less-insane Rs creating parallel state operations in places where the completely-insane Rs have taken over the state Republican Party.  Here’s hoping they take a couple of decades to sort it all out!

  75. 75.

    Jeffro

    Btw Geminid, if/when you see it…it looks like Amanda “trump in heels” Chase has not one but TWO Republican primary challengers(!)

    I guess even Rs get tired of “show horses” who don’t actually *do * anything.  Who’d have thunk it?

  76. 76.

    Mike in NC

    Several years ago we went to a funeral on Long Island. My wife’s cousin had a daughter working in Africa as a teacher of some sort, and one day she and her infant daughter were killed on safari by a rogue elephant. An absolute freak accident. It was a bizarre and rather creepy visit, but I was never comfortable going to Long Island in the first place since it was MAGAland long before Trump crawled out from under a rock.

    Anyway, half expect the GOP to declare George Santos an excellent candidate for Vice President. The more indictments the better!

  77. 77.

    smith

    The UK, being a modern society, long ago dispensed with the barbaric practice of sacrificing kings. Now they sacrifice superfluous princes. Much less messy.

  79. 79.

    Citizen Alan

    @montanareddog: After nearly a thousand years, I’m sure most people of Anglo descent can claim descent from William the Conquerer. Ditto Charlemagne and Genghis Khan.

  80. 80.

    Goku (aka Amerikan Baka)

    @satby:

    What a total jackass! Keep us up to date. If he tries to sue you he’ll lose, but I have a feeling he’s too cheap to follow through

  82. 82.

    Dan B

    @sab:  Now that the Ohio GOP has their dream of forced pregnancy and ‘you are all slots if you don’t agree with us’ they want to force the majority to put up and shut up.  They are lustful – for ruthless control

    I hope they fail horribly and are driven from their offices and their communities.

  84. 84.

    West of the Rockies

    @Jackie:

    Is not the USAF Academy known for its wingnuttery?  I wonder how receptive the cadets will be.   Will one or six decide not to attend the ceremony because freedumb!

  89. 89.

    Old School

    I see Rep. Comer and the House Republicans have decided today is a good day to bring back “But Hunter Biden!”

  91. 91.

    smith

    @West of the Rockies: I believe West Point is Army, not Air Force. There are bound to be some MAGAs among the cadets there, but people hoping to have careers as Army officers are not likely to make public waves.

  92. 92.

    opiejeanne

    @UncleEbeneezer: The FTFNYTimes ran an op/ed last week opining that Jack Smith had already blown his chance at Trump by being too thorough in his investigation, or some such nonsense.

  96. 96.

    Omnes Omnibus

    @West of the Rockies: ​
      As people have pointed out, West Point is army, but the other thing is that all of the academies are active duty military and the cadets/almost 2LTs will show up and be polite.

  98. 98.

    gvg

    @Jeffro: Didn’t the constitution also say we can’t have troops quartered with us? Or was that the Declaration? Anyway it feels like we have wild bandits quartered with us, which was in fact what the colonists felt like when they had those troops put in their homes.

    There are in fact gun lovers who would never do any direct harm and only do indirect harm. 1) they fantasize about being a hero 2) they cover for the extremists and always vote for more guns. Its like men not believing their buddies are rapists. They are complicit though, very complicit. I wish I knew how to get through to them. I know some gun nuts who really don’t like certain things, hate Trump, thought Bush getting us into Iraq was a mistake a bunch of stuff but keep drifting back to other republicans and guns.

  100. 100.

    Matt McIrvin

    @OverTwistWillie: Kind of reminds me of the push between simplifying and elaborating the pomp and pageantry in the Catholic Church. Pope Benedict XVI actually seemed to be trying to bring some of it back but Francis has dialed it down a little again–though it’s always more extreme even than what the British royalty manages.

  102. 102.

    opiejeanne

    @Goku (aka Amerikan Baka): You can play their crosswords for free, they just aren’t the current ones, or the Sunday ones.

    I couldn’t read the article because I don’t subscribe, but that’s the gist of the teaser I saw.

  103. 103.

    Matt McIrvin

    @gvg: The no-quartering rule is the Third Amendment, maybe the least controversial amendment in the Bill of Rights. There was actually one honest-to-God prominent federal case that involved it–Engblom v. Carey, which was about putting up National Guard strikebreakers in the living quarters of striking New York State prison guards. But it didn’t get to the level of the Supreme Court.

  104. 104.

    opiejeanne

    @eclare: Ha! I think it’s that magical deadline of Trump-running-for-President nonsense that he’ll run out of time to indict.  Didn’t get to read the whole thing, it was behind a paywall and just a teaser headline.

  106. 106.

    Geminid

    @Jeffro: I saw the WaPo article on the race. Chase’s two opponents seem to be pitching themselves as more effective, but no less conservative. Former Sen. Sturdivant is trying to live down his vote for a “Red Flag” law on 2019, says he “whiffed” on that one. So he’s joined Chase and the other hopeful on calling for machine guns to be regulated on the same basis as other firearms.

    It’s a very red district, so one of the three will probably be the next Senator, but hopefully in the minority.

    Redistricting threw Senators L. Louise Lucas and Lionel Spruill into the same district. Their race is said to be close.

    And you have quite a fight in your Senate district, between old war horse Creigh Deeds and up-and-coming progressive Delegate Sally Hudson. Primary voters tend to be more liberal, and I think Hudson will win. She’s running an energetic retail campaign. If she hasn’t knocked on your door yet, I bet she will.

  111. 111.

    Jackie

    @West of the Rockies:  West Point isn’t Air Force – it’s Army.

    BUT, Biden is doing the Commencement at the Air Force Academy! As you mentioned, they’re a cesspool of MAGA wing nuts, so I hope Dark Brandon shows up!😁

  113. 113.

    Paul in KY

    @Gin & Tonic: They are multiplying like crazy, as Columbia is a hippo paradise, compared to Africa (really too dry for hippos).

    They have tried to catch some and have found out that ‘you need a biggerer cage’.  One even jumped out of an enclosure with 6 foot high sides. Until that time, no one had known that hippos can jump like that!

  115. 115.

    Paul in KY

    @montanareddog: Thru various women & men, Charles III can claim direct lineage all the way back to William I (who was born a bastard, but was Duke of Normandy when he came to England).

    If Harold Godwinson had treated his army to a rest before confronting William, he might have continued on as king. He had just defeated an army in Northern England and force marched his troops 140 miles to meet up with William’s rested army.

  116. 116.

    Ceci n est pas mon nym

    A couple of thoughts:

    Santos is charged with telling lies to the House of Representatives? Isn’t every Republican in Congress guilty of that every time they make a speech on the House floor?
    My immediate thought on hippo guy was that he’s either incredibly brave, incredibly stupid, or has a good relationship with that hippo. Leaning toward the latter, because why else would it back down?
    But why won’t the same hippo go for a stroll that night?
    I just turned my laptop in for repair (this is an iPad, which is slightly less frustrating than trying to type on a phone). Going to be a long week.

  117. 117.

    Jeffro

    @Geminid:

    old war horse Creigh Deeds and up-and-coming progressive Delegate Sally Hudson. Primary voters tend to be more liberal, and I think Hudson will win. She’s running an energetic retail campaign. If she hasn’t knocked on your door yet, I bet she will.

    Yup.  I like Creigh but I like Sally better, and I already early-voted.  BOTH House D primary candidates have stopped by my house already, btw(!)

  118. 118.

    CliosFanBoy

    Butterflies will sometimes land on a Caiman and drink its salty, crocodile tears to in order to survive. This helps the Caiman to feel both less sad and more fabulous.

    Now illegal in Florida, Texas, and Arkansas.

  119. 119.

    gVOR08

    Here in FL we won’t have butterflies on alligators. DeUseless would never allow alligators in drag.

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