finally saw one in the wild. a beautiful vehicle, photos don't do it justice pic.twitter.com/JQyQNEfuDe
— Rob DenBleyker (@RobDenBleyker) May 18, 2024
I finally saw my first Cybertruck today and it didn't disappoint. Looked like an enormous version of one of those old VHS-tape rewinders, both driver and passenger looked uncomfortable, stain on the door. It's not in the way he intended, but this is absolutely Elon: The Car. A masterpiece.
— David_j_roth (@davidjroth.bsky.social) May 19, 2024 at 11:07 PM
Have you seen a Cybertruck yet? https://t.co/frRfYzC3B2
— Defector (@DefectorMedia) May 21, 2024
… The experience was not any less startling or unsettling for how ready I considered myself to be for it. I had read about the Cybertruck for some time, and watched numerous videos of Cybertrucks doing rudimentary four-wheel-drive shit with the sort of dexterity and confidence generally associated with concepts like “George C. Scott’s first capoeira class” or “Robocop doing burpees.” I have also been following Elon Musk’s uncanny transformation into the single most unfortunate middle-aged outcome for the Butt-Head character from Beavis And Butt-Head. I knew that his pretty vile company had made him very rich, and I also knew that despite some duffed hagiography and thanks mostly to his world-historic dedication to showing his ass, Musk himself is now most famous as a wrecker and creep, and also that the cars he makes, the Cybertruck in particular, extremely do not work. I knew what he was like, and I knew that this dorky truck was his passion project. This would seem like pretty good preparation for seeing his latest vehicle, but I can tell you that it absolutely was not.
… The Cybertruck was made to not look like other cars and trucks, which is a statement that would scan as a compliment if you had not seen a Cybertruck. The Cybertruck is mostly but not entirely car-shaped. It is stiff and very gray and looks like home electronics looked when Bill Clinton was president; it is both too jankily long and too upright for its amusingly normal-sized tires, in a way that makes them look like small, cheap dress shoes. There is a lot of vertical space serving no evident purpose, and the vehicle is somehow imposing and goofy in exactly equal measure. It looks like if Hot Wheels made a VHS rewinder, or like what the cars would look like in a version of Freejack in which a circa-now Rob Schneider was the star. Imagine a neckroll-equipped NFL fullback from 1995 who gets himself onto a frankly risky steroid program and simultaneously stops working out and you are maybe some of the way there in terms of the proportion.
And I knew all this, or thought I knew it. But I was not ready for how it would feel, how it would seem. I knew that this vehicle was a boondoggle—that Tesla can barely manage to manufacture it at all, let alone properly, and that it will power all the way down like a stressed-out C-3PO if run through a car wash and ages like brass if left out overnight in the rain. Through an episode of the What A Time To Be Alive podcast, I was caught up on the astonishingly grim Cybertruck Owners Club Forum, which is surely one of the best places on the internet to find adult men posting things like, “I just want to thank Mr. Musk for creating a car door that’s both heavy and sharp enough to sever my leg below the knee, which mine did, and which was both entirely my fault and an experience for which I am very grateful.” I have heard friends tell me about how stricken the Tech Alphas they’d seen driving one of the few Cybertrucks currently on the road—no less sympathetic a source than the Cybertruck Owners Club forum put that number under 4,000 last month—had seemed when they realized that the effect on observers was less Driving The Future and more Tentatively Doing Errands From Within A Super Nintendo. I can confirm all this, but I can also confirm that is insufficient.
What I can tell you is this: I saw my first Cybertruck stop at a red light near the Museum of Natural History in Manhattan on Sunday, and this car sucked in a way that had strangers on the sidewalk making Oh brother faces at each other. I could not have been better prepared to encounter this vehicle, and yet I was not prepared at all. It is one thing to have an image in your mind that roughly corresponds to “Albert Pyun‘s Homercar: 2049” and quite another to watch that actual vehicle turn, seemingly on drunken tiptoe, onto Columbus Avenue. It is an experience that everyone should have, I think. The stupid, tacky future that our culture’s reigning mediocrities are making every day can feel abstract and almost poignant when encountered through a screen—a thing that no one but them wants, and which does not work very well, trying and failing to seem like progress. It is much more useful, I think, to see how ridiculous—how gaudy and cheap and patently unwantable—that future looks trying to navigate the world in which everyone else is trying to live.
The Cybertruck is out there, workin' hard to prove it can carry a load of manure. https://t.co/cwkjaegsqe
— jill kent (@JillaneKent) May 20, 2024
When you peel off the decal https://t.co/yhoinuabh7 pic.twitter.com/rYPd8SEt86
— zeddy (@Zeddary) May 8, 2024
The second real carmakers get serious about EVs, combined with Elmo doubling down on the Apartheid Clyde persona, they might just be in trouble. https://t.co/wnLAbln0hK
— Clean Observer (@Hammbear2024) May 22, 2024
Baud
Elon saw an El Camino and said hold my beer.
eclare
The Dead sticker on the Cybertruck…does not compute. A woman I know just bought a Tesla, one of the sedans. It looks really nice from the outside. She gave me the requisite “I despise the man,” but she said she loves the car, and now her power source for everything is electric, with rooftop solar panels.
Also she lives in MS, and it’s odd to see MS tags on a Tesla.
eclare
@Baud:
Exactly. My uncle had an El Camino.
Rusty
I had my first encounter with a Cybertruck a few weeks ago. It’s as jarring experience as the writer explained. I’m an old fashioned gearhead, reveling in obscure makes and weird models of vehicles. A Porsche does nothing for me, but a real life encounter with a Levi’s edition AMC Gremlin would be a personal event. I am pre-wired to like almost anything on wheels, but my reaction was entirely negative. Strangly proportioned, awkwardly tall, it’s just ugly. Add the bizarrely unusable truck bed and the complete disregard for ergonomics and I was just left with a feeling of why? How could any design team think this was good? The insane price only adds to the disgusting experience. All of that in a fleeting look as it drove down the street in traffic.
Martin
We have a few in town. Not sure how many are owned by residents, though. Rivian HQ is also in town. A lot of EV design groups are right around me, so you see all kinds of weird EVs around.
I’m not sure how badly Musk realizes he’s damaged Teslas reputation. I know a LOT of early Tesla owners that would never buy another one. Customer loyalty is usually pretty cheap and pays big dividends. It’s basically Apple’s entire marketshare strategy – keep ’em happy.
Rusty
@Baud: Beacuse the El Camino started from an already existing car, there were a lot of limitations with turning it into a light duty pickup the designers couldn’t avoid. For most of the project they didn’t have a lot of choices. The Cybertruck on the other hand was a rare clean sheet design. Each element of the truck was an unconstrained choice. They deliberately made it that bad. Given the price, they weren’t even very constrained on cost which often drives less than optimal decisions. It’s a very deliberately bad vehicle.
Brachiator
I have never seen a Tesla Cybertruck on the streets. And for now, how the vehicle looks is a giant irrelevancy. It has been around long enough for people to evaluate the truck’s usefulness and to document performance and manufacturing failures, which seems to be significant.
Stepping back, there are some impressive EVs on the market (the KIA SUVs are fun), there are general issues. EV batteries are too heavy, mileage range is too low compared to traditional cars, and the charging network is weak.
Also, I listened to a podcast in which an EV enthusiast claimed that waiting 25 minutes or more to charge a vehicle was no big deal, and people would get used to it. I don’t think so. I was on a recent road trip with friends and family, and the longest stop we made was maybe 10 minutes, for a restroom break and to buy snacks.
And a larger problem is the availability and reliability of chargers. I keep running across stories and news reports of chargers not working or people not having the right adapters.
And then there is this. EV companies were making deals to use Tesla chargers for their vehicles, and then Musk did this.
This just seems nuts.
The tariffs on inexpensive Chinese EVs is unfortunate. I guess I understand some of the politics.
And Trump’s apparent opposition to EVs, like the other notions that rattle around in his deranged mind, is just fucking stupid. Just another reason why he needs to be kicked to the curb.
Martin
@Brachiator: He fired the Supercharger team so he could relocate the effort to Texas, hire a new team and not have to pay to relocate them.
If you ever see Musk disbanding a team, it’s to get around labor law.
SpaceUnit
The Tesla Cybertruck. Finally a truck that so many deserve.
Tony Jay
It’s about time the question was asked.
Are Cybertrucks so ugly, useless and expensive because Musk, the aging sci-fi obsessed wannabe-uberlord, has actually engineered first-generation Decepticons?
SpaceUnit
@Tony Jay:
More likely he’s just an idiot.
Ten Bears
Yes. Just the other day, on a tow-truck. The patina a hint of rust …
Betty Cracker
I saw my first Cybertruck in the wild at a local grocery store parking lot a few weeks ago and thought it was more hideous and ungainly in person than in photos. I figure the driver had to be from out of town. We have plenty of stupid, corrupt, wealthy truck owners around here, but they tend to cosplay Yellowstone rather than sci-fi as processed through an abby-normal oligarch’s brain.
SpaceUnit
@Betty Cracker:
I’ve been seeing a lot more Tesla cars in my area lately.
Haven’t seen that buttugly truck, thank dog.
And yeah, I know it’s just a matter of time.
VeniceRiley
I claim to have emigrated to England for marriage, but it’s actually to avoid seeing one of these abominations.
In other news, lots of Tories deciding not to stand for reelection, and I get to party on July 4th without a single disapproving side eye from anyone!
Baud
@eclare:
Their sedans do have a nice exterior design.
I probably would have bought a Tesla but for Musk and stories about their poor build quality. But mostly Musk.
Baud
@VeniceRiley:
Don’t tell your spouse the real reason.
Baud
@Betty Cracker:
If I had a nickel for every time I’ve heard that…
Suzanne
@Baud: I always thought Teslas (the sedans, anyway) were nice-looking until I rode in one. The interior wasn’t good.
I think these appeal to red-pill men and the skinny-suit crowd. Like, that guy who went viral on Xhitter this week for posting his picture, thinking he was really hot, but couldn’t get any women to talk to him. There seems to be a pretty big gulf in what hetero women (at least, women of any degree of social status) find attractive in men and what hetero men believe makes them appealing. It’s kind of an interesting phenomenon.
Suzanne
@VeniceRiley: So….. I have a theory. Nothing more, just a theory. But I kind of think Sunak wants to lose. I think he wants to flee that sinking ship. And I think he wants to get some revenge. I can think of no other reason for him to call the election so soon.
Baud
@Suzanne:
If the UK is anything like the US, Labor will inherit a mess, won’t be able to fix it perfectly and immediately, and the Tories will come back strong and be in power for another 15 years.
Baud
@Suzanne:
I am thankfully not on Twitter, so I missed that.
satby
People might be seeing more Teslas on the road because Hertz is selling off their entire EV rental fleet, so you can pick up one, or a Chevy Volt, at a pretty reasonable cost. I wish I could buy one of the Volts, but I need a new roof on the house more.
eclare
@Suzanne:
I’m going to ask my friend who has a sedan if I can see the interior the next time I see her.
eclare
@satby:
I got a new roof in January after a neighbor texted a photo to me with the question “do you know your roof has a hole in it?” It was in a part of the roof that I cannot see from my yard but she could see from her house.
It’s spendy. My sympathies.
Chris T.
@eclare: The interiors of the Tesla sedans are plasticky and feel like a cheap econobox. Which would be fine if the car cost under $20k, but…
satby
@eclare: yeah, I’ve had estimates from a low of $8k (ha, sure) to an insane high of $29k that didn’t include soffits (nope). An inspector from the city told me a decent bid should be between $14-17k (including soffits). Getting a new one next week from a company he suggested.
twbrandt
I saw my first Cybertruck in the wild yesterday, and yes, even dorkier in person than in pictures.
Betty Cracker
@satby: Glad you got advice from a trusted inspector, who’s in a position to know what’s what.
The previous owners of this house claimed the roof was new when they sold it to us, and the (possibly corrupt — it’s notorious locally) inspector we had didn’t contradict them.
But it turns out the prior owners did some half-assed DiY shit, and within a year it was raining in the bathroom, so we had to replace it anyway. It was not a happy day when we got that news!
eclare
@satby:
Mine was around $15k, but I didn’t get the soffits replaced. It’s a one story house with an attic. They did a good job, and I knew I was due because I bought this house in 2005, and the roof was not new then.
The gaping hole just sped up the schedule.
eclare
@Betty Cracker:
How aggravating!
Quantum man
Looks like a dumpster on wheels!
Chris T.
We’ve been expecting to need a new roof relatively imminently, but our last anti-moss-treatment guy said it still looks pretty good and we might get some more years out of it. (This being the PNW, there’s so much rain and clean air that moss will grow on anything, even metal railings. You have to have your roof baking-soda-ed yearly.)
Ken
Axe body spray and the ability to talk about themselves for hours?
Baud
@Ken:
I feel seen.
matt
Something about that truck, it looks dumb the same way the Segway looked dumb when it started showing up out in the world.
Betty Cracker
@eclare: It was, but we knew the place was a money pit. We got it cheap before the market went nuts, lucky for us. Every major system and appliance needed replacing.
Gvg
I always had the impression Musk didn’t want to build a truck but got conned into promising one. So after years of delay, he had that built. It really comes across as he hates trucks and people who want to buy one for truck reasons. He wants to change them into a different kind of person. People who don’t want to put a bunch of bulky stuff in the back, and move it somewhere.
satby
@Betty Cracker: yeah, it’s hard to get good advice, especially as a single older woman that a lot of people think will be an easy mark. Laugh’s on them, I’ve paid for a roof on just as big of a house once before.
But that situation for you guys sucked. I think corruption is predictable in red states. Too many incentives, not enough regulation.
Brachiator
@Martin:
Wouldn’t it be easier to ask valued employees to relocate?
This is an odd way to inspire loyalty and the best effort of his workers.
Nukular Biskits
Good mornin’, y’all!
And, yes, I’ve seen several. And they’re ugly AF.
I’ve said this before and I’ll say it again: If given the choice of keeping my 2002 F150 with 340K miles, rust, huge scrape down the entire passenger side, leak around the 3rd-eye taillight, unwashed for 10 years, and 15 mpg (going downhill in neutral with a tailwind and the engine off) or a brand-spankin’ new Cybertruck?
I’ll keep the F150.
Trivia Man
That SYF sticker is just a reminder that not all Deadheads are hippies. In word or deed or attitude. Trustafarians are a real subset. My personal guess is this is one of the Touch Heads* who got on the bus after the MTV blitz. The frat boy who said “a place to do drugs in public? SOLD!”
* derogatory term for Deadheads who got involved after Touch of Gray was a mainstream hit, In some ways it is just gatekeeping by holier than thou Boomers who think the band was a sell out for playing in stadiums and never got over Pigpen. And in other, very real, ways it rings true for many of them. Not a drop of ethos or community, just reagan era FYIGM attitudes that wouldn’t dream of passing on a miracle.
For the record, Im pre-Touch. They played it as an encore at my first show but I was already hooked by a Phil Bomb during Jack Straw in the first set.
OzarkHillbilly
Why do I get the feeling I will be the last person here to see a cyber truck in the wild?
Frankensteinbeck
@Martin:
Nope. I read about it. He just plain scrapped the project. Pulled the expansion funding. Gave the work to a team that’s already busy and only has the vaguest idea how to do it. Pissed off all the vendors so the people he gave the job to have to start from scratch on a job where they only made a project because they got fantastic deals from those vendors by forging close relationships.
It happened immediately after the woman in charge of that section and thus the most powerful woman in Tesla telling him the personnel cuts he had already asked for were too much. So, apparently, because a woman told him he’s wrong he fired her and her whole department.
Says he doesn’t care about the charging grid anymore, he wants to focus that money on robo-taxis.
Kirk
@Martin: I think partly that’s true. I think ego was a greater factor.
The ego was to show Tinucci that he was boss. She came significantly higher than him in that Motor Trends “most impactful” article.
Note that the majority of the team was scattered in states and nations other than California.
Nukular Biskits
@eclare:
Hey! LOL.
Trivia Man
@satby: And regulations are why i want a string central government. It is the only possible counter for too-big-to-fail organizations that are designed and run to squeeze every last nickel out of every last transaction on earth. OSHA, FDA, EPA, and many more. Powerful and with teeth? Yes, please. National Parks are the cherry 🍒 n top.
Bruce K in ATH-GR
@OzarkHillbilly: I don’t think the Cybertruck has reached Greece yet, so you’ll probably see one before me. Athens streets are too narrow and the islands don’t have much EV charging infrastructure.
pinacacci
I saw one in the wild a few weeks ago and immediately texted my brother that it was more ugly and clumsy-looking than you could possibly imagine.
Brachiator
@Suzanne:
One comedian joked that Sunak called for a July election so that he could move to America and enroll his kids in school for the fall term. Supposedly he and his wife have homes in California.
But a while back, some pundits thought that Sunak would have called for a general election in May. They were surprised that he let that opportunity pass. And then Sunak hinted that he might call for a general election in the second half of the year, and people assumed that this meant November. The July date caught even some Tories by surprise.
I’m not sure who might be a target of Sunak’s revenge. He seems more hapless than vindictive.
Nukular Biskits
@Betty Cracker:
Reminds me of a (long) story about inspectors.
Years ago at my old place, I made the decision to go with underground power to the house. Up to that point, power was provided via in-the-air line that ran though the front yard to a pole by the driveway and then to the box on the house. Unfortunately, this route took it through the crowns of some very beautiful live oaks, which I most definitely did not want to cut down.
Anyway, I secured a permit, power company came out, disconnected power and began trenching. While they were trenching, I removed the old box and mounted a new one, with new breakers, etc. Upon completion of all the work, I called the county planning commission as they had instructed when I got the permit and requested an inspector come out so I could get approval to have the power cut back on (a post-Katrina requirement … any time power was cut, an inspection was mandatory to get it restored).
Planning commission said I should have called 2 days previously and scheduled the inspection. I’m like “WFT? That’s not what you told me!”
Power company guys said, “Don’t worry, we’ll make a call.” About 15 minutes later, an inspector drives up, spends all of 2 minutes looking at my handiwork, gives the approval, and leaves.
I’m in the wrong business.
OzarkHillbilly
Shades of the Humvee I spotted in Valldemossa, Mallorca.
Nukular Biskits
Are posts being eaten?
Brachiator
@Baud:
Labour will definitely inherit a mess if they win in July. And as has been noted, a number of senior and prominent Tories have announced that they will not stand for election, including Conservative Party Prince of Darkness Michael Gove.
Some committed Labour supporters will be urging people to use tactical voting to obliterate the Tories by voting for whoever has the best chance of winning in a particular constituency. This will often be the Labour candidate, but could sometimes be a Liberal Democrat or Green Party candidate.
And even though it might not be in the Labour Party manifesto for this election, some are hoping that Labour tries to achieve some early success and then push for a change in the voting system to use proportional representation. This might make it harder for the Tories to ever win a majority.
Bruce K in ATH-GR
@OzarkHillbilly:
I’ll take a guess that it was someone with more money than sense. Taking a Humvee on Athens back streets would be a recipe for disaster – although, to be fair, there’s nothing wrong with a Humvee that couldn’t be fixed by two or three passes through a car crusher.
Steeplejack
@Baud:
The Incel Camino (h/t to some Internet wag).
Geminid
@Bruce K in ATH-GR: I’m curious: do you see many EVs being driven around Athens? Electric buses?
Anne Laurie
Nah, you actually get out there and drive, so you’re bound to run across one eventually (maybe driven by a lost hipster).
As a happy recluse in a deep-blue state, I’m pretty sure I’ll win the ‘last to see one in the wild’ trophy… especially since my Spousal Unit does the driving, so even if we pass one, I may not notice it until he points it out to me!
Baud
@Brachiator:
Promotional representation would be a cool experiment there.
p.a.
The ego issues of an elmotruck purchaser are baffling. There are lots better wastes of money available such that you can still publically present yourself as an asshole. Wanting to represent as a stupid asshole is odd.
Oh wait; isn’t that MAGA in a nutshell? Never mind…
OzarkHillbilly
@Bruce K in ATH-GR: I have no idea how they got it in there. Maybe it was helicoptered in.
OzarkHillbilly
@Anne Laurie: Most of my driving these days is local, driving in places where no sane person would be caught dead in one and the insane generally go elsewhere.
Tho I am going to the Boundary Waters in September so I may come across one on the way up and back. ;-)
CaseyL
I’ve seen one Cybertruck in person.
I work at UW Medical Center, near Husky Stadium, where the lightrail station is. I was waiting to cross Montlake, the main drag by the stadium, and there it was: a red Cybertruck going down the street. Bright red, though not quite fire engine bright.
The red was a definite improvement over its native color. Very awkward appearance: ungainly, not-a-car-not-really-a-truck, a triangle on wheels. Looks for all the world like something a 13 year old would build from bits they scrounged. But the red saved it from “Holy Shit That’s Ugly.”
Since Cybertrucks rust when wet, then Seattle is the perfect city for them./s
Ghost of Joe Liebling’s Dog
A little voice inside my head said
WTF
WTAF
Eyeroller
@CaseyL: I presume that must have been a custom paint job. Yesterday I saw a bright-pink Tesla, which also must have been customized.
CaseyL
@Eyeroller: I assumed the same thing.
I mean, even if Tesla offered it as an option, I’d still rather have the paint job done by someone who knew what they were doing.
Which would not be Tesla.
VFX Lurker
Cybertrucks seen in the wild:
I prefer small cars, so I prefer the Chevy Bolt.
MagdaInBlack
@OzarkHillbilly: September in the Boundary Waters. I’m a wee bit envious 🙂
Another Scott
@Suzanne: I heard some guy on the radio say that the recent UK inflation news is the best news Sunak is going to get for months, so it was pretty much now or do even worse at the polls.
Maybe!
I see that Corbin is running as an independent. That could be very interesting. The Labour leadership is broken – maybe Corbin can do well as a gadfly.
Cheers,
Scott.
VeniceRiley
@Suzanne: My theory is that, plus he doesn’t want to further hurt Tories by giving time for the even further right Reform Party a window to organise.
Dmbeaster
@Brachiator: How much does he care about loyalty when he fires people by email and no last week or severance? I know someone who works there, and those not axed are less than inspired to keep giving it all for Mr. Weirdo.
artem1s
@Brachiator:
ASK>?.
Apparently you heard none of the reports about how he handled his labor problems at X. Firing a bunch of people because he thinks they don’t really do anything is sort of his whole MO. Also,too I can’t imagine any incentive big enough to get a team of people who can do that job to move from California to Texas.
Gin & Tonic
@Eyeroller: Those bold or unusual colors are usually wraps, not paint jobs. It’s a thin layer of some kind of plastic substance, sort of like shrink-wrapping.
Don K
@Chris T.:
My husband’s nephew drove a sedan and described the interior as having no character or soul, as if you built a new kitchen entirely with white Formica and white vinyl flooring.
kindness
El Caminos are station wagons with a bed behind the drivers seat. They used the same frame the station wagons used which really isn’t as strong as what a truck would need. I’ve seen a few Cybertrucks out here in N Cal. Every time I, I shake my head and wonder what it is exactly that motivated the driver to buy the useless thing. (speaking as one who has an F-150 for my dog running & mountain activities)
Tom Levenson
I saw my first CT in the wild a couple of weeks ago. I was in a restaurant with windows right onto Main St. in the North Shore town of Rockport MA. Despite the name, Main St. is a narrow, one lane-one way former bridle path. Muskrat’s folly filled the available width between parked car and curb. It looked stupidly outsized for setting and had been, as everyone here has said, whacked so hard and so often with the ugly stick to make them “trucks” for those who’ve had tastectomies.
Tom Levenson
@Tom Levenson: Also: if one really wants a useful vehicle that can swallow everything short of construction materials in quantity, there is no better car on the road than a minivan with the back seats-flat-in-the-floor design.
A Toyota Sienna is the ultimate work/live vehicle. I don’t make the rules.
Don K
@twbrandt:
I saw a CT a couple of weeks ago around 8 Mile and I-75 in Detroit (don’t ask) and decided it was the ugliest thing on four wheels I had ever seen – even worse than the pictures. It makes an Aztek look svelte and racy by comparison. There are a lot of Teslas where I live (by now probably local right-wingers showing solidarity with Elmo), but I don’t think there will be many CTs around here. It’s probably destined to be this generation’s version of the 70s pimpmobile Eldorados.
Juice Box
@Eyeroller: No, the custom colors are probably wraps. Since most cars now seem to be offered in an exciting choice of various shades of grey, wraps have become popular where I live Some Cybertruck drivers even get clear wraps immediately to prevent rust.
I live in SoCal where the default car is a Tesla and Cybertrucks are no longer a novelty. My spouse bought one of the Hertz Teslas this winter so as to avoid giving That Man any of our money. I did not want to have people even think that I gave That Man my money, so I drive a Bolt. I just plug it in and fill it up with the electricity that I pre-paid for when we bought solar panels. It’s super-convenient and there are various solutions, if I ever decide to go on a road trip.
If anybody wants a 2001 330ci, Dakar yellow with an excellent ragtop, let me know … Sadly, it’s an automatic. It is, however, more satisfying to drive than the Bolt, even with the automatic.
Juju
@Ken: I hate those men. They make your eyes water and your ears bleed at the same time.
Tom Levenson
@Juice Box: I sold my 1998 E36 328ic in 2021 and miss it. 5 speed. It had a bunch of problems and would have required several thousand to bring back to reasonably comfortable daily-driver status. (Basically, the electric accessories were all going, and I needed a new convertible top motor).
Even with all that, I miss that car. My wife and I have been a 1 car family since then, a 2013 Toyota Prius plug-in. It’s a great appliance, and the single most boring car on the road. Our next car will be one size larger and all electric.
All of which is to say I’m almost certainly not interested in your ride, but wish I were. What’s the mileage? (The automatic doesn’t bother me as much as it would have, as arthritis in my left hip makes BMW clutches a bit tricky.)
Glidwrith
@Gin & Tonic: Living in San Diego, I have the privilege of observing multiple Teslas and Cybertrucks in the wild.
Multiple Teslas that are pink, matte red or blue like a Christmas ornament, iridescent (changing color depending on how the light hits it). Been inside a couple as well-uncomfortably proportioned, the door handle is not easy to find and open.
The trucks? Yep, every bit as jarring, even with multiple exposures. The best one was solid black, which had the effect of hiding the awkward angles. My son says they look like the Matrix failed to fully render the truck.
comrade scotts agenda of rage
Not El Camino, Pontiac Aztek.
Tariffs on China EVs is very much a good thing. If they want to sell cars here, they can fucking build em here like everybody else has had to do.
2023 Bolt EV owner here. Fit/Finish on Tesla, as in it’s 1980 Chevy Citation quality, is well known. They’ve improved over the last 4 years but the cars still ride and feel “thin”. I ride in a friend’s regularly and can never wait to get back into by Bolt.
Another Scott
Meanwhile, … InsideEVs.com:
AFAIK, Teslas have always been wildly, wildly optimistic on their stated ranges, even compared to other manufacturers.
I’ve mentioned before that my 2023 Kia Niro PHEV is rated at 30 miles all-electric range. When it’s warm out (above 70F), I routinely get 42-45 all-electric miles out of it even using the AC (maybe 25 when it’s cold (below 50F)) commuting (about half stop and go, half highway). Tesla could give more real-world numbers, but chooses not to.
Caveat emptor.
Cheers,
Scott.
RaflW
@Baud: The thing is, I see a Hyundai Santa Cruz, which is basically an updated 4-door El Camino, and I have an ‘ohh I want one’ reaction. Not once, evah, for the overdesigned stainless toaster Elon hucks.
eta: @comrade scotts agenda of rage is absolutely correct, in saying not El Camino, Pontiac Aztek. Yep yep yep.
Ruckus
@Rusty:
I have 2 responses to this thing. First – What kind of drugs would make anyone think that was whatever the hell it is supposed to be, and how could anything that created that level of nightmare actually be purchased by humans that lived? Second, what the hell is this world coming to that something like that is considered worth even building as child’s toy? (I’ve worked on the tools that created a number of toys that many people would recognize, like Barbie doll molds) That thing is FUGLY. From every angle.
karen marie
@Suzanne: Shit the bed, then bitch when another party doesn’t clean it up fast enough. It’s worked for Republicans.
@Baud: Great minds think alike. Although in this case, one’s mind doesn’t have to be great. One only has to have a memory better than a gnat.
Ruckus
@Quantum man:
Dumpsters are useful…..
Ruckus
@Brachiator:
This is an odd way to inspire loyalty and the best effort of his workers.
I think I see your problem – 3 words, loyalty and best effort. The man in charge wants only one thing and that thing is spelled money. And he started life with a lot of it, not by earning it. And in that world, money is the thing that signifies greatness. Not what is accomplished to get it, if anything whatsoever other than being born.
Another Scott
Meanwhile, …
Zooks! :-(
Cheers,
Scott.
Another Scott
Meanwhile, …
Hmm….
Cheers,
Scott.
m.j.
You just know these vehicles are going to appear in a movie.
That’s all he wants.
Citizen Alan
@Rusty: I’m coming around to the idea that they deliberately made it bad as a sop to elmo’s vanity and narcissism. Because the cyber truck is so badly flawed both in concept and execution, Literally, the only reason for anyone to buy one is cult like devotion to the guy who owns the company.
StringOnAStick
A car hauler semi was spotted here in Bend, the load nothing but these abominations (there’s a dealership here). The local Reddit wags posted a photo with the caption “hey, Bend, your refrigerator order arrived”.
Yes, they are head turners, but only in the sense of “wow it’s even worse in person”.
StringOnAStick
@m.j.: It will appear in a movie, but as an object of derision. He’ll sue over it.
JaneE
I love how the rodeo version had a paint job. Best way to keep it from rusting. Better looking too. Still way ugly, but not in a cute way.
Tesla makes a lot of popular EV’s, but fit and finish was never one of their selling points. Elon may go with just buy a new one when his toy breaks, but for most people shelling out thousands the car should work for a few years at least. Getting software fixes OTA is easy. Getting a fender dent removed used to take months just to get the appointment. Great, until someone dings your car.
Citizen Alan
Relatedly, I got to ride in my first Tesla yesterday when the uber guy picked me up at the train station in san francisco. My two big take away you swear 1) the door handles were ridiculous and 2) damn that’s a really large video screen on the front dash!
Bruce K in ATH-GR
@Geminid: Late to respond, sorry, but EV cars are becoming more common in Athens. Hybrid buses are a thing, and they’re starting to bring battery-powered EV buses online (there was a bureaucratic glitch with the bus charging network, so that’s going slow). And believe it or not, there’s been an electric trolley bus system in Athens for the better part of a hundred years – it was already well established long before my first visit there.
rebelsdad (aka texasboyshaun)
@eclare: MS tags on a Tesla
That’s almost as bad as using a picante sauce from New York City!
rebelsdad (aka texasboyshaun)
@Ten Bears: Must’ve been a humid day.
O. Felix Culpa
I saw a Corvair on the road yesterday. Would rather drive that than a Cyberthing.
like a metaphor
I bought my first car when I was 15. It was my dream car- a ’59 Chevy. If you don’t remember, the 59 was the one with enormous horizontal tailfins, ending in a gull wing shape, with giant cat eye taillights. This car was already 25 years old, with lots of dents, in a pea-soup green color. When I pulled into the driveway, my Mom came outside and gasped “Child, that is the ugliest car I have ever seen!”
A short while later, Time/Life came out with a special issue: The Ugliest Cars in America. I got a copy to show my Mom. The Edsel was #1. The ’59 Chevy was #2. See, Mom, you were wrong!
Gvg
@Tom Levenson: the roof gets in the way and mini vans aren’t great for dirty stuff like horse manure or mulch or trash to the dump. I have had both. I am thinking about going back to a truck. I’d like a model with decent gas milage. I’d love a cheap electric truck which doesn’t exist yet. Stalling, hoping for development of something that I’d actually like.
Tehanu
@Citizen Alan:
I had my first ride in a friend’s Tesla recently (not a Cybertruck) and I was shocked that there was no dashboard, just a screen. I asked, “Isn’t that dangerous? Do you have to take your eyes off the road to, like, turn on the windshield wipers?” He said yes, it is, and he wouldn’t buy it again.
OldDave
I spotted a Tesla CT in South Florida a month or so back sporting a TFG promoting wrap. The thing is larger than I thought it would be, and yes, not at all attractive.
prostratedragon
From Rusty above:
“Each element of the truck was an unconstrained choice.”
That could be the funniest thing I’ll see all day. Haven’t seen a cybertruck on the street yet, but with pictures I have to fight to see the tires as round rather than square.
A woman from anywhere (formerly Mohagan)
@OzarkHillbilly: I can maybe beat you. I’ve seen a few Tesla sedans in town (rural N CA), but around here people expect trucks to work for a living. They need to carry at least 8 bales of hay at a time, for a start.