Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

It’s the corruption, stupid.

I really should read my own blog.

Come on, man.

There are more Russians standing up to Putin than Republicans.

If you still can’t see these things even now, maybe politics isn’t your forte and you should stop writing about it.

“When somebody takes the time to draw up a playbook, they’re gonna use it.”

“In this country American means white. everybody else has to hyphenate.”

Wow, you are pre-disappointed. How surprising.

Let there be snark.

This is dead girl, live boy, a goat, two wetsuits and a dildo territory.  oh, and pink furry handcuffs.

Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

Following reporting rules is only for the little people, apparently.

My right to basic bodily autonomy is not on the table. that’s the new deal.

Sadly, media malpractice has become standard practice.

Democracy cannot function without a free press.

It may be funny to you motherfucker, but it’s not funny to me.

This fight is for everything.

Welcome to day five of every-bit-as-bad-as-you-thought-it-would-be.

fuckem (in honor of the late great efgoldman)

You passed on an opportunity to be offended? What are you even doing here?

Celebrate the fucking wins.

“Just close your eyes and kiss the girl and go where the tilt-a-whirl takes you.” ~OzarkHillbilly

Come on, media. you have one job. start doing it.

Live so that if you miss a day of work people aren’t hoping you’re dead.

You are here: Home / John Cole Presents "This Fucking Old House" / Saturday Night Open Thread

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84Comments

  4. 4.

    Scout211

    That’s a really nice happy blue color, John.  It goes well with the base color of your house, too.

  5. 5.

    KayInMD (formerly Kay (not the front-pager))

    I agree with the others. It’s a pretty blue. Besides, in my experience outdoor paint fades pretty quickly.

    Also, yes. some outdoor porch plants would look nice. Also they would provide a place for those squirrels to bury acorns.

  9. 9.

    Jackie

    I like the robin’s egg blue, and that shade tends to fade/mellow pretty quickly.

    PS: Your squirrels are cute 😊

  11. 11.

    lowtechcyclist

    @Scout211: ​

    That’s a really nice happy blue color, John. It goes well with the base color of your house, too.

    But does it go well with the willow? ;-)

  15. 15.

    sukabi

    I look forward to your upcoming posts about “those fucking squirrels” getting into and eating your garden…..

  19. 19.

    CaseyL

    Did someone here recommend Casual Geographic on YouTube? If so, many thanks. Love his stuff.

    He likes to post the occasional horrifying episode, and I just watched one titled “The One Rule of Nature School Never Taught You,” which is basically about how animals we think of as “herbivores” aren’t obligate herbivores and will occasionally, or more than occasionally, take a walk on the wild side of carnivore-ism.

    The reason I mention this here and now is that one of those animals is… squirrels.Yes, you may have seen the viral videos of squirrels chowing down on KFC, but apparently they are not averse to eating baby birds.

    John, I know you like your porch and yard to be a sort of UN of neighborhood critters, but now that you’ve added squirrels to the mix, it may behoove you to make sure they have plenty of nuts to eat. Because you also have nesting birbs.

    Just sayin.​​

  21. 21.

    Snarki, child of Loki

    “sky blue” has been etched into our brains for the past million-plus years as good and beautiful.  So good choice for the paint.

    As for squirrels, if you have a vegetable garden, then they are EVIL SQUIRRELS, otherwise just playful rodents.

  22. 22.

    satby

    It’s a wonderful, restful blue and I like it with the yellow of the house.

    I am a fan of squirrels, so ignore the haterz and enjoy yours.*

    *Yes, it was annoying when they ate my tulip bulbs, but chickenwire over the top of the bed fixed that, as did used (scooped) pine cat box litter. Squirrels smell predator and stay away.

  23. 23.

    Honus

    Everyone in Brooke is going to see that blue and think “he was out in Arizona too long”

    And don’t even think of wearing those rainbow overalls into Wheeling.

  24. 24.

    Jackie

    @Kelly:

    Been out harvesting peas and strawberries. No basket  I just eat’em as I go.

    I used to send my kiddos wild berries picking. They had two containers; the rule was “I don’t care how many you eat, but if you want cobbler, fill the containers!” They always came back with full containers and berry-stained mouths 😁

  25. 25.

    Scout211

    @Kelly: Been out harvesting peas and strawberries. No basket  I just eat’em as I go.

    Nice.  I’ve been out harvesting blueberries and it seems like there are still millions more to pick. I can’t eat all of them as I pick them, but it’s alway important to test a handful or two just to make sure they are ripe.  😉

  26. 26.

    Trivia Man

    With no connection to painted porches, the naked bike ride was successful. Not too hot, some shade to use along the way. Very slow ride, about 150 people and 10 miles or so. Took 2 hours. Not uncomfortable at all, lots of cheering people. Passed maybe 1,000 people along the way and only heard 2 negative comments. One shouted and one mumbled only to me. I don’t really need a crowd but solo naked is a lot trickier.

  27. 27.

    OzarkHillbilly

    Just to add my voice to the choir, the blue is nice John. It’s different. I like different.

  28. 28.

    Prescott Cactus

    The willow wouldn’t seem too close to the house with a couple coats of that beautiful blue.

  29. 29.

    Trivia Man

    @Jackie: Back in California the neighbors took me to an olalaberry patch for picking. (Spelling? A No Cal variant on blackberries – NOTHING better for berries). I was about 10 or so and on the way home I may not have had any berries in my basket at all. Barfed out the window while driving – she was freaked out but managed to talk me through rolling the window down in time. White station wagon. Good thing she was able to hit a car wash within the hour. Sorry!

  31. 31.

    Leto

    I like the blue. It’ll be a good color over the course of the summer as it’ll help you connect the porch to a calming place. And Jesus will be need it over the next six months.

  32. 32.

    Trivia Man

    @different-church-lady: they cost me a solar panel. Added rodent screen around the edges and so far so good. The bunnies however harvested roughly 50% of everything I planted this year once it was a tender shoot. Bummer.

  34. 34.

    Leto

    @Trivia Man: when our son was about five, Avalune took him over to a nearby strawberry patch. It was one of those “put as many strawberries as you can in the provided basket”, but the boy was simply picking and eating as he went. And he was just covered in strawberry residue. The owners just laughed their butts off, and told her to pay it no mind. Thankfully no vomiting was involved later!

  35. 35.

    Jackie

    @Trivia Man: I gave the kiddos the reminder that eating too many would result in upset tummies and/or diarrhea. They learned that lesson the year before, and remembered 😂

  38. 38.

    zhena gogolia

    Okay, there are enough guys without pants around here. I don’t want to know about the naked bike race.

  44. 44.

    kissel

    What brand of paint did you use? It looks really nice. I painted my deck with Sherwin Williams outdoor paint, but I have to repaint every year. I think it’s from living in Northeast PA, cold in the winter and not truly dry enough to paint outside.

  46. 46.

    HumboldtBlue

    @Scout211: ​ 

    I’m one of eight kids and each summer from 72-78, our parents would take us to the blueberry farms outside of Dover to pick the blueberries. We whined, and whined and whined and complained and whined and moaned and whinged and moaned and whined some more — about the sun and heat, about how hard it is to pick them damn berries, everything.

    At one point, one of my older brothers started singing “li’l black Sambo” which sent my mother off, she got pissed and he caught hell. It was dad who always reminded us that mom’s blueberry pies in winter were made possible by the picking of the berries in the summer. It’s part of family lore.

  47. 47.

    Trivia Man

    @Jackie: Another fruit story that only made me laugh many years later – I was eating green plums while delivering papers. California so there were fruit trees everywhere. I really liked these, smaller than normal they are about the size of a small walnut. I like them kind of tart so I would start testing them well before fully ripe. It was just about my favorite stage – getting soft but still tart – and there were several trees along the route. I’d pick a few, eat a few, stash some in my pockets for later. Ate dinner no problem IIRC. But later that evening sudden stomach pain that was so severe mom took me to the ER. I NEVER had digestive issues. NEVER that I can recall. So they were puzzled. Docs were quizzing me about what I ate. Cereal, sandwich for lunch, a few plums in the afternoon… wait! How many?

    I don’t know exactly, not many but I’ll guess. I start visualizing… probably about 10 in this pocket, 10 in that, 10 in that, and 10 in the other. Plus a few in my newspaper bags… no more than about 20 in front and 20 in back. So I’d guess I ate about 60-80 total.

    Eye rolls all around. Go home.

  48. 48.

    Trivia Man

    @Scout211: YES! We had several wild patches in back of the house along the creek. Mmm, Mmmm, Mmmm. Better than a blackberry but until I went to college I thought they WERE blackberries..

  50. 50.

    CaseyL

    My strawberries aren’t doing much this year. I’ve wanted to go to a U-Pick-It berry farm since forever, it seems, and maybe this month I’ll finally do it!

    @scav: Apparently, everybody eats baby birds.  Squirrels, deer, cows, horses…Casual Geographic calls baby birds “the Kit Kats of the animal kingdom.”

    I feel bad for the parents.​

  51. 51.

    Scout211

    @rikyrah: Anyone know anything about this water situation with farmers in Idaho?

    I can’t see the tik tok but I did a search for the info.

    Here’s a recent news article.  It sounds a lot like the water wars that have occurred in California and other states.

    A ground water curtailment has been issued and it sounds like a lot of finger pointing as to who is to blame.

  52. 52.

    Odie Hugh Manatee

    @rikyrah:

    It’s about groundwater districts that are not in compliance with state water usage regulations and have not adopted a plan to come into compliance yet. IOW it’s farmers and the districts they are in that don’t want to comply as they have what are called “junior rights” when it comes to water usage. This means that they come second when it comes to water usage and shortages.

    Short story is the usual kind of people who want it all for themselves and don’t want to comply with the state constitution and law on the matter.

  53. 53.

    Jackie

    @Trivia Man: 😂

    My dad had a huge Bing cherry tree in his backyard. My in-laws lived in MN and they were out here (eastern WA) during cherry season. Dad and FIL picked a styrofoam cooler full of cherries and it sat between them for the two day drive back to MN. My poor MIL…  💩 💩 💩

  55. 55.

    Jackie

    OT but funny!

    Michael Cohen told New York Magazine that he will challenge Rep. Jerry Nadler (D-NY) in the 2026 Democratic primary: “He’s been in office 30 years. We thank him for his service, but it’s enough already.”

    Nadler responded to Playbook: “What a great country America is. Anyone can run for Congress — even con men.”

    I like Cohen, even though he’s no angel. He’s not going to beat Nadler, and Nadler doesn’t sound too concerned 😂

  61. 61.

    MomSense

    Youngest and oldest have gigs today so far apart I couldn’t go to both.  I went to youngest kid’s gig at the Maine Blues Festival and he did really well.  Worst beer I’ve ever had in my life but the company and music made up for it.

    Oldest’s band is playing at one of my favorite venues in Ogunquit tonight.  I wish I could be there.

    I am dog sitting my grand puppy and giving him lots of treats! I’m going to try and organize the laundry/sewing room tonight.  I think I am most excited about having a whole laundry room and dedicated sewing space.  I’ve only ever had cramped laundry closets.

  63. 63.

    Scout211

    @smith: OMG!  That’s perfect! 🤣

    ETA:  That’s the only way I could possibly listen to the shark/boat/battery gibberish.

  64. 64.

    Jackie

    @eclare: He should start gingerly and run for city council or such.

    TCFG has every felon thinking they can run for federal office, and win. I’ve noticed several MAGA felons running for office this year.

  65. 65.

    David 🌈 ☘The Establishment☘🌈 Koch

    @Jackie: ​
    Richard Pryor used to joke if he was president he would appoint a member of the Black Panthers to run the FBI because they would know each other, inside and out.

    If Cohen wins he should be assigned to the Judiciary committee as no other member would have more experience with DOJ.

  68. 68.

    smith

    @Jackie: I’m glad Cohen turned away from the Dark Side, but when I’ve seen him in interviews he still comes across to me like an asshole. That’s the wrong vibe for the Democratic party.

  70. 70.

    eclare

    @smith:

    To me he comes across as the stereotypical New Yorker.

    Old joke:  how does a person ask a New Yorker for the time?  Can you tell me what time it is or should I just go fuck myself?

  71. 71.

    smith

    @eclare: That’s true. It’s the major reason I wasn’t worried about him alienating the jury in the Felon’s recent trial — they were all New Yorkers who interacted with people like him every day.

    On the other hand, when I was in grad school in NYC, I never got used to people whose default setting was pugnacity. It was a relief to ultimately land in the Midwest.

  72. 72.

    Scout211

    @MomSense: I’ve only ever had cramped laundry closets.

    Until we moved into this house with a laundry room I had only ever had laundry in the garage. Too hot in the summer and too cold in the winter, plus a concrete floor that was never really clean.

    An indoor laundry room is really a must.  Good that you now have that.

  73. 73.

    glc

    @different-church-lady:

    Oh god he’s not listening about the squirrels…

    I was tempted to take that as an expression of surprise, but I don’t think that’s really possible at this point. So I’ll take it simply as an expression of dismay.

    There’s an equally good argument that he shouldn’t have water faucets in the house, and certainly not a stove, but that’s not going anywhere either.

    Whether or not it is clear to you, no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should. Well, now I go too far; but this seems one of the rare instances where one can actually hold to that point of view. Alternatively: de gustibus et de coloribus non disputandum.

  74. 74.

    Kelly

    @CaseyL: Apparently, everybody eats baby birds.

    I’ve noticed our local bald eagles show up about the same time as the goslings hatch.

  75. 75.

    Soprano2

    You are crazy to want to attract squirrels. They’re rats with bushy tails. You have to get special bird feeders or else they eat all the seed. Woe is you if they manage to get in your attic. The little suckers stripped all the insulation out of our attic for their nests. Do.not.want.

  78. 78.

    wjca

    @Odie Hugh Manatee: Short story is the usual kind of people who want it all for themselves and don’t want to comply with the state constitution and law on the matter.

    Considering the enthusiasm with which people who object to the Federal government’s Constitution, laws and regulations “infringing on their freedom”, it can hardly be a surprise that they would react negatively to the state’s constitution and laws doing, as they see it, the same.  Libertarianism running towards its logical conclusion.

    The question is how long before the State of Idaho decides to get serious about enforcement.  That and how many casualties the ensuing gun battles will generate — and there will be gun battles, serious ones.  I’m betting the Idaho National Guard, complete with its heavy weapons systems, get ordered in.   But, assuming the state government has the fortitude to stay the course, there’s no real question who wins.  No matter how many self-branded militias there are running around the Idaho countryside playing soldier.

  82. 82.

    Origuy

    Since this is a squirrel heavy thread, yesterday I learned that there is squirrel in Norse mythology.

    Ratatoskr is a squirrel who runs up and down the world tree Yggdrasil to carry messages between the eagles perched atop it and the serpent Níðhöggr who dwells beneath one of the three roots of the tree.

    I learned this from a website that spammed me to sell t-shirts with Norse images of dragons, ravens, etc. Dragons are cool enough, but mythical squirrels are tops. And yes, I had to order one of the t-shirts..

  83. 83.

    Lily

    Last week someone normally a scientist was telling me that “living very close to blue space” (like a 5-7 min walk from the ocean) improves mental health.

    That looks like a real nice blue space fwiw.

  84. 84.

    AM in NC

    @CaseyL: I was surprised to read that squirrels are one of the species benefitting from this year’s cicada emergence! I thought they just liked my ripening tomatoes and backyard pecans.

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