Did a long stretch today and was shooting for Nashville but it was starting to get dark and I don’t like to drive either in the dark or when I am not fresh because I am not going out of this world using my two ton vehicle as a missile to kill a family of five, so I called Joelle and she booked me a room at motel somewhere in between Memphis and Nashville. Should be home tomorrow afternoon sometime.
I am not saying Joelle put me in a dive hotel to kill me and get my inheritance, but I will say that there is a 4 foot sinkhole in my room and a Waffle House next door, so if this is the last you hear from me, it’s been real.
Lapassionara
Oh, my, Welcome to rural West Tennessee. Try to find a diner that serves catfish and hush puppies. And thanks for letting us know where you are.
PsiFighter37
Let’s be honest: this is the real America, and it explains why we are in the state we are in.
Be safe, Cole, but if you were driving between Munich and Innsbruck, you would have your mind blown. I only mention this as an analogy because it’s basically the distance between Memphis and Nashville.
Lily
You should’ve seen the other dive.
.
satby
😂 I think I stayed there once.
Drive safe tomorrow John.
One of André Leon Talley's Fifty Pieces of Monogrammed Louis Vuitton Luggage
And you’ll be walking over that sinkhole three times in the next 10 hours.
Timill
So you’re in Jackson TN then?
Betty
Smart move to know it was time to stop. Sorry about the room. That’s 4 feet wide, not deep, right?
RepubAnon
Fun times!
chrome agnomen
Waffle House=guilty pleasure
catclub
I have memories of the pet friendly room in a hotel in Tennessee.
I did survive, so did the cat.
But I have seen MUCH nicer pet friendly rooms.
Omnes Omnibus
@PsiFighter37: There are some shitty hotels between Munich and Innsbruck. And some backwardass countryfucks living in the area too.
@Cole: Nice knowing you, John. Try to take a few with you. Be all that you can be.
WaterGirl
Thanks for the update, Cole! You know we worry.
WaterGirl
@Omnes Omnibus: If John were actually reading the comments instead of getting ready for bed, I would expect him to post a clown photo in response to your message!
different-church-lady
Wait… you have an inheritance?
different-church-lady
That narrows it down to any 4000 square feet of Tennessee.
TaMara
Maybe don’t take a shower?
Safe travels tomorrow if you survive the night.
Omnes Omnibus
@WaterGirl: He’ll understand it. If he read it. Which he won’t. But still.
sab
Driving whike tired is actually dangerous. We jackals love you Don’t do it,
Omnes Omnibus
@sab: He isn’t doing it. That’s why he is in the death motel.
Geminid
Sounds like you might be close to the Natchez Trace. Keep an eye out bushwackers and catnappers!
HinTN
@chrome agnomen: No guilt in this southern boy. I love me some Waffle House.
They Call Me Noni
Sweet dreams.
mrmoshpotato
@chrome agnomen: Now I have to look at their menu and go mmmmmmm.
Geminid
@HinTN: Some rib-stickin’ food for sure!
RevRick
@different-church-lady: Ownership of some obscure blog.
mrmoshpotato
@Geminid: Steak and eggs!
Geminid
@mrmoshpotato: They also have a strong fried potato porfolio.
I mostly see them near interstates. I think a lot of their customs are travellers. You can drive six, seven hours easy on a Waffle House meal.
Westyny
Maybe you can just stay at the Waffle House.
Spanky
@Westyny: I think it’s been done. Tip your waitress well before nodding off.
Jackie
@Geminid: I recall my one and only Waffle House experience – Tennessee. I was craving a salad. I didn’t want eggs, hashbrowns or bacon or sausage or grits… After being told they didn’t serve salads, I settled for eggs and whole wheat toast. I was informed there was no such thing as whole wheat. I was basically laughed out of Waffle House. Never been back to my lesser refined children’s favorite “restaurant.” They think I’m nuts. I probably am lol
Parfigliano
Waffle House is starch, fat, and salt at a decent price. All one needs to travel distance in these 50 states.
Bupalos
What does that mean “4-foot sinkhole?”
Like, a sump pump thing?
Bupalos
@sab: Don’t worry SAB, he’s just a West Virginian. Never made it to Akron and that’s on him. Whatever happens, happens.
Chetan Murthy
I have a Canadian friend who regularly drives between Ottawa and Florida. Like, -regularly-. He’ll call me when he’s on the road, and we’ll chit-chat. One time, it was getting late and he was hungry. So I googled him up a a North Carolina BBQ shack near the highway. I was so jealous that he got to eat the stuff, but OTOH, better him than nobody I knew *grin*.
Cellphones have changed long-distance travel. You can call your lifeline and have them help you find whatever-you-need, without having to stop and break our your smartphone to do it.
comrade scotts agenda of rage
Waffle House = Pleasure
kindness
I’ve never eaten at a Waffle House. I assume they are like Denny’s, but Southern.
frosty
I keep seeing Waffle House next to Huddle House and thinking they should merge and call them Waddle House. That’s what you do after eating too much of their food.
comrade scotts agenda of rage
@kindness:
https://www.businessinsider.com/cracker-barrel-waffle-house-dennys-and-ihop-breakfast-taste-test-2019-2
Spanky
@frosty: Huffle House
CaseyL
Thanks for checking in, John. We hope to hear from you tomorrow :)
Staying in a sink-holed fleabag of a motel sounds better than driving through rural Tennessee after dark. I’ve never forgotten that short story I read as a kid – I think it was in an Alfred Hitchcock horror anthology – about a small Southern town that used speed traps to catch travelers, whom they treat ever so kindly for a few days – including feeding them up real good – and then they would barbeque and eat them.
Jay
@kindness:
The Waffle House Index is a metric named after the ubiquitous Southern US restaurant chain Waffle House known for its 24-hour, 365-day service.[1] Since this restaurant always remains open (except in extreme circumstances), it has given rise to an informal but useful metric to determine the severity of a storm and the likely scale of assistance required for disaster recovery.[2][3] It was coined by former administrator Craig Fugate of the Federal Emergency Management Agency (FEMA).[4] The metric is unofficially[2][5] used by FEMA to inform disaster response.[6][7]
Tim C
She got you a hotel. This means she made an effort.
She loves you. Accept it.
Trollhattan
Waffle House.
Winning.
Bupalos
@Chetan Murthy: I’m always amazed when people (and this happens on the regular) are just like “let me relate to you, as if it isn’t the most important thing in what I’m about to tell you, but rather just an ancillary thing I didn’t note, that I’m expecting no one to note) that a fuckton of carbon is being emitted without any thought whatsoever, and no one cares. Because this story is about how there is some specially prepared meat to eat in some place.”
My best guess is this story/food reccomendation in 50 years will sound like how we hear a 1940’s nazi barely mentioning having to detour around the annoyingly chaotic train depot with all those masses of people clogging things up, on the way to this awesome schnitzel spot.
mrmoshpotato
@CaseyL: That sounds like the plot of 2000 Maniacs.
Jay
@kindness:
NotMax
Hope you had the good sense to pull over while using the phone.
Speaking of a motel room with a funky floor, ever seen the movie 41?
Sister Golden Bear
@chrome agnomen:
Especially the Friday Night Fights /s
Shalimar
If the Waffle House falls into the sinkhole, a new angel is born.
Omnes Omnibus
@Bupalos: You’re fun at parties, aren’t you?
Chetan Murthy
@Bupalos: You have no idea why my friend drives back-and-forth to Florida. No idea at all.
Omnes Omnibus
@Bupalos:
BTW, probably the best schnitzel spot I know of in Germany is just outside the ammunition storage bunker facility at Grafenwohr. In case you were wondering.
Melancholy Jaques
@Omnes Omnibus:
Trying to imagine what a German version of Deliverance would be like. Or a German version of Hee Haw.
Omnes Omnibus
@Melancholy Jaques: In Bavaria and the Tyrol, there is a bar sport that involves driving nails into a block of wood. Just saying. They have the equivalent of “hollers” there too.
ETA: They all know the words to “Country Roads.” And sing it in bars.
Art
Waffle House: the bloated manifestation of the holy trinity of Southern cooking: salt, sugar, and lard. Heavy, greasy, loaded with salt … entirely suitable if you’re swinging a hoe ‘sun-to-sun’ . The modern consequence is what you might expect: wide, flabby, slow-moving people who tend to die young. It’s not all bad. Hard labor or extreme cold, or a crack habit, demand lots of calories and an occasional indulgence does little harm.
Not so much with the crack, or tequila, or anything else that causes you to wake up in strange places with fresh, but mysterious, tattoos. Who the hell is ‘Bettie’ and why is she doing things with a snake.
The ‘scramble bowls’ are okay and, perhaps not without exception, but most Waffle Houses seem to at least know what wheat toast is. I think I had some last year.
Also the waffles aren’t bad. Go light on the butter and syrup and you won’t risk much. As always; don’t feed the two-legged wildlife or they follow you home. And always drive like they are out to get you.
BigJimSlade
@Omnes Omnibus: The best version of Country Roads is Toots’ version:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a_i66vtoySQ
Mandarama
@kindness: Denny’s is Waffle House for people who can’t fight.
(h/t a fellow Southerner funnier than I am)
cmorenc
@sab:
The GOP thinks its more dangerous to drive while woke than to drive while tired.
eclare
Good for you. Have a nice breakfast tomorrow.
rikyrah
Waffle House=Love😂😂😂
Safe travels, Cole🤗
A woman from anywhere (formerly Mohagan)
I ate at a Waffle House once, years ago, when I was in Raleigh NC for a computer training – it was across the street from the motel my company had put me in. With all this talk about the food (which I didn’t remember clearly), I just googled Waffle House Menu and OMG what came up was that there are FOUR in Northern California – 2 in Berkeley (!!), and one in Corte Madera, and Larkspur. A Waffle House both on University Avenue, and Telegraph Avenue in Berkeley! I am gob-smacked
ETA: I couldn’t believe it and double-checked, and NO, there do not seem to be any open WFs in N CA. Maybe there used to be??. I clicked on the website for one in Berkeley and it took me to some random business on University, so maybe … weird.
Betty Cracker
Jay
@Betty Cracker:
https://fortune.com/2024/06/17/waffle-house-increasing-base-pay-menu-prices/
$3 an hour.
Baud
I’m an International House of Pancakes man myself.
TS
I followed in some detail the UK post office scandal – and psychologist Paul Duckett reported on it regularly with his psychological bent. He recently put up this video and it gives some interesting insight into the trump administration (which he realised – or mentioned partway through). 20 minutes of interesting commentary as to whether we blame the people or the environment.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4EuDH3F_tT4
On another topic, voting is complete in Australia (40 minutes ago, current time in Australia 6.37pm Saturday). Result for the lower house (representatives) should be known in 2-3 hours unless it is very close. The final senate make up will take days/weeks, but the party that wins the house provides the PM.
AEC results https://tallyroom.aec.gov.au/HouseDefault-31496.htm
TS
@TS:
I should have said voting is closed in the East. WA is 2 hours behind, so the polls are still open.
Betty Cracker
@Jay: It is a sacred place with shitty pay.
WaterGirl
@TS: We have a post up for that.
UncleEbeneezer
@chrome agnomen: I’ll definitely take a Waffle House over a Cracker Barrel any day of the week. Cracker Barrel always feels like a Sons/Daughters of the Confederacy convention.
UncleEbeneezer
@Mandarama: Oh that’s good, lol.
WTFGhost
The sinkhole leads to the deepest pits of hell, but that’s because it’s the motel’s current Presidential Suite, and they don’t like Trump either.
WTFGhost
@sab: Frankly, I don’t even consider it a challenge until you’re ready to pour the coffee over your leg, to see if it helps you stay awake better *THAT* way.
Um. I see your point. You want Cole to still be here today (well, if I’d been awake to post, yesterday, “tomorrow.”). Yeah, driving while tired sucks.
jhwbiz
Sounds like Joelle finally read your PayPal comments.
BillD
I drove that stretch between Memphis and Nashville a little over a week ago. I can’t believe there is still a Nathan Bedford Forrest State Park just off I-40 about halfway between. Ate at a Waffle House House for the first time—just a waffle, side of bacon and coffee, not one of their fancier spreads. OK but not great. In Alabama, near Montgomery where I visited the fabulous Legacy Museum, was an electronic billboard celebrating Confederate Heritage Month. I guess it was for the April of Fort Sumter not the April of Appomattox Courthouse. Ah, the South.