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Balloon Juice

Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

The words do not have to be perfect.

Not so fun when the rabbit gets the gun, is it?

Schmidt just says fuck it, opens a tea shop.

It may be funny to you motherfucker, but it’s not funny to me.

I did not have telepathic declassification on my 2022 bingo card.

Let me eat cake. The rest of you could stand to lose some weight, frankly.

Eh, that’s media spin. biden’s health is fine and he’s doing a good job.

Give the craziest people you know everything they want and hope they don’t ask for more? Great plan.

So it was an October Surprise A Day, like an Advent calendar but for crime.

The republican caucus is already covering themselves with something, and it’s not glory.

You can’t love your country only when you win.

Thanks to your bullshit, we are now under siege.

Let us savor the impending downfall of lawless scoundrels who richly deserve the trouble barreling their way.

“Squeaker” McCarthy

If you’re pissed about Biden’s speech, he was talking about you.

Good lord, these people are nuts.

fuckem (in honor of the late great efgoldman)

Optimism opens the door to great things.

if you can’t see it, then you are useless in the fight to stop it.

I like you, you’re my kind of trouble.

This fight is for everything.

Motto for the House: Flip 5 and lose none.

Balloon Juice has never been a refuge for the linguistically delicate.

Take hopelessness and turn it into resilience.

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The folks at the Libertarian

by John Cole|  July 21, 20029:02 pm| Leave a Comment

This post is in: Open Threads

The folks at the Libertarian Samizdata now have effectively cornered the market in hot brainy babes that pack heat.

The folks at the LibertarianPost + Comments

This is the best reason

by John Cole|  July 21, 20028:59 pm| Leave a Comment

This post is in: Open Threads

This is the best reason

that I have seen as to why Rep. Traficant’s hair looks the way it does.

This is the best reasonPost + Comments

No Shit. WorldCom will file

by John Cole|  July 21, 20028:31 pm| Leave a Comment

This post is in: Open Threads

No Shit.

WorldCom will file for bankruptcy protection today, according to the embattled company’s chief executive. The bankruptcy would be the largest in U.S. history.

Didn’t see that coming.

No Shit. WorldCom will filePost + Comments

This is the most shameless

by John Cole|  July 21, 20028:27 pm| Leave a Comment

This post is in: Open Threads

This is the most shameless and outrageous op-ed piece I have seen in the NY Times in a long while (I no longer read Dowd, so I may be wrong).

Wagging the dog no longer cuts it. If the Bush administration wants to distract Americans from watching their 401(k)’s go down the toilet, it will have to unleash the whole kennel.

Maybe only unilateral annihilation of the entire axis of evil will do. Though the fate of John Walker Lindh was once a national obsession, its resolution couldn’t knock Wall Street from the top of the evening news this week. Neither could the president’s White House lawn rollout of his homeland security master plan. When John Ashcroft, in full quiver, told Congress that the country was dotted with Al Qaeda sleeper cells “waiting to strike again,” he commanded less media attention than Ted Williams’s corpse.

In two paragraphs, Rich has now stated the following through insinuation and exxageration:

A.) The war on terror is a sham designed to hide the woes of the DOW.

B.) Not only is it a sham, but Bush et. al. are too stupid to do it properly, and must engage in more of it. I am sure this is setting the stage for Rich to call any future action against terrorism/Iraq as further evidence of “Wag the Dog” behavior.

C.) By implication, the woes of Wall Street are causing a failing economy- which we know is not the case.

D.) Even more sinister, Rich is suggesting that the woes of Wall Street are somehow Bush’s fault.

E.) Bush is indifferent to the woes of investors, and merely cares about obfuscating and talking about Homeland Security.

Paging Common Dreams. I think Rich may be your next editor.

This is the most shamelessPost + Comments

The Blogfather and others have

by John Cole|  July 21, 20028:15 pm| Leave a Comment

This post is in: Open Threads

The Blogfather and others have been mentioning the TIPS program, and everyone seems to be somewhat scared about the Orwellian nature of the program. I am scared, but as usual, for a much different reason.

The reason I am scared is because I am shocked that this is the BEST idea we have for what would amount to a Federal neighborhood watch- reliance on civil servants???? Let me get this right- the best way to find terrorists in our midst is to employ the same people that took three weeks to get my mail to me when I moved 1/2 mile across town? And this was after I went to the post office and TOLD them my new address.

Yeah. I am scared alright. Excuse me while I go build my bomb shelter.

The Blogfather and others havePost + Comments

Reason # 5 billion to

by John Cole|  July 21, 20028:05 pm| Leave a Comment

This post is in: Open Threads

Reason # 5 billion to hate the French

MONT VENTOUX, France — As he closes in on a fourth straight Tour de France title, Lance Armstrong is hearing a familiar but unwelcome chant from fans lining the route.

On Sunday, after another strong performance in the mountains extended his overall lead to almost 41/2 minutes, Armstrong had heard enough.

“If I had a dollar for every time somebody yelled, `Doe-PAY! Doe-PAY!’ (French for ‘Doped! Doped!’), I’d be a rich man,” he said. “It’s disappointing.”

For what it is worth, Armstrong has never failed a drug test, and he steadfastly denies ever using illegal substances. On the other hand, this is the story behind the French favorite:

Virenque is one of the riders who’s most popular with French fans, even though two years ago he confessed to taking drugs when competing for the Festina team. That whole squad, including Virenque, was thrown out of the 1998 Tour when a stash of banned drugs was found in a team car.

Hrmm. Makes you wonder.

Reason # 5 billion toPost + Comments

Why does everyone in the

by John Cole|  July 19, 200211:42 am| Leave a Comment

This post is in: Open Threads

Why does everyone in the Granola Mafia talk like this:

These comments are from William Quick’s comments board, and are so funny they need to be reproduced:

The republicanspeak corporatist propaganda engines can weave their web of disinformation, distortion, and lie, and cite polls buttressing their spin and work to refract the seriousness of the many abuses of Bush and his obscenely rich and greedy corporatist cronies,- but the truth will not be silenced for long. There are far too many terrible questions yet to be answered. This is America. The people have a constitutionally protected right to dissent, to ask questions, and to demand answers from our supposed leadership. Bush and his imperialist cronies will be held accountable for their misdeeds. Unless this imposter and his clan of pathological liars has bin Laden’s head on a plate before the next election, – Bush can forget about stealing another presidency. The enormity and incestuousness of the republicanspeak corporatist machine and their web of lies, collusion, disinformation, and malfeasance is so thick and sticky; it will eventually smother them in their own filth. You can rely on polls and spin, – I will trust the truth.

Tony Foresta

The loon left his email over at Quick’s site. Feel free to email him and provide him with another opportunity to dissent. Just don’t dare ask him to tell you one right of yours that has been eroded within the last two years. He might melt down.

Why does everyone in thePost + Comments

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