Balloon Juice - Rotating Tag Nominations

1	This is the way.
2	I have spoken.
3	McConnell is a turtle-faced, fascist sack of shit who doesn’t believe in the United States Constitution.
4	Balloon Juice is such a weird place.
5	We ended up with transgender bathrooms instead of flying cars.
6	A sufficient plurality of insane, greedy people can tank any democratic system ever devised.
7	When your President is a carnival barker, you’re going to have a circus.
8	Alternate: When your President is a carnival barker, you’re going to have a bunch of rubes.
9	The taproot of bigotry is the seeking of unfair advantage; libs are suckers for thinking otherwise.
10	The GOP is FUBAR.
11	Cole is an eldest child, so he has no idea how a little love can avert pooping in the hallway to the bathroom.
12	Balloon Juice, never a refuge for the linguistically delicate.
13	Trump is going to draw a dick on that dog with a Sharpie before this is all over, isn’t he? (Betty Cracker)
14	Fuck these fucking interesting times.
15	“Yeah, well, you know, that’s just, like, your opinion, man.”
16	Think of it like Cole’s new house – you walk in and find Walter, but then you fall through a hole in the front porch.
17	Meth, This Site Is ON It!
18	Nevertheless, she persisted.
19	“Fortunately nobody else was home, and we have no rabbit.
20	… and don’t forget to hydrate
21	These assholes make me want to scoop out my eyes with a melon baller and jam chopsticks through my eardrums right now.
22	Fuck it, we’ll do it live!
23	All I wanted from the trip was a t-shirt, and I got this shitty president, instead…..
24	Yeah, two fucking people in their 70s on the ticket. That is brilliant.
25	Alternate: two people in their 70s on the ticket. That is brilliant.
26	He’s the index to the cookbook, except no one has written any of the recipes.
27	Alternate: He’s the index to the cookbook with no recipes.
28	It costs a lot to look this cheap. – Dolly Parton
29	I was told there would be no math on this blog.
30	You must be this old to comment here.
31	I’m never afraid, and I’m rarely surprised.
32	Alternate: Never afraid and rarely surprised.
33	Tunch is not fat; he is floofy. (Alternate: Steve is not fat; he is floofy.)
34	Fuckem.
35	Wow, I can’t imagine what it was like to comment in Morse Code.
36	Fuck it and drive on.
37	What does the Orange Concealer, conceal?
38	Let there be snark.
39	The president is a whiny little bitch.
40	A blogocracy, not a democracy.
41	I heartily endorse this thread or product.
42	Nothing but Malarkey served here.
43	all things trump… expensive, but cheap looking
44	Jackals Assemble.
45	Alternate: The Day of The Jackal
46	Shocking, but not surprising
47	In a more just world, the clouds would listen.
48	The Willow is too close to the house.
49	It’s always darkest before the other shoe drops.
50	… never a haven…
51	It’s getting to be ri-goddamn-diculous”
52	I’m only here for the duck photos.
53	Not even wrong.
54	The cruelty is the point, the law be damned.
55	Get your facts first, and then you can distort them as much as you please. -Mark Twain
56	Orange is the new blech.
57	It’s the corruption, stupid.
58	Andrew Sullivan should be ashamed of himself.
59	The DNC server is in West By God Virginia!
60	Touched by his noodly tentacle.
61	Eating tire rims and anthrax since 2009.
62	STFU, Donnie. You’re out of your element.
63	Stable genius just took my bookbag.
64	100% fewer Trump cameos than Home Alone 2!
65	Not the face!
66	RTMFA
67	Where the deer and the antelope play… warily.
68	Don’t forget to hyphenate!
69	Lindsay Graham is the Mike Pompeo of Steve Mnuchins
70	aww, blow it out your ass.
71	Something is very wrong.
72	Reader, I declined to engage further.
73	Backup wives! This really is a full service blog.
74	When I decide to be condescending, you won’t have to dream up a fantasy about it.
75	Actual thoughts and prayers.
76	We’re a forward looking blog.
77	We’ll see if the cats can be herded. As you know they bolt if anyone picks up a laser pointer.
78	I’d try pessimism, but it probably wouldn’t work.
79	Can you imagine what it is like to be a person who sacrificed their integrity for… Donald Trump.
80	No one sacrificed their integrity for Donald Dump; they simply revealed their lack of it.
81	The condom would be for the pig.
82	To sum up, the whole situation is shitty.
83	Blow me.
84	That’s a lot of pomposity based on a personal anecdote and a semester of college.
85	Balloon Juice p0rn = grumpy detectives
86	You don’t have to go to every argument you’re invited to, especially when the other guy has already made up his mind.
87	I am annoyed by this translation
88	You’re a liberal hack I’m not talking to you
89	if senate republicans had any shame they’d die of it.
90	But I do respect the idea that in a country this fat, stupid, white, racist, sexist, and complacent, the way out might have to run through Joe Biden.
91	Everyone is the hero in the movie that is their life.
92	Republican senators in Impeachment Hearing: 52 toddlers squirming in Time Out.
93	Republicans don’t lie to be believed. They lie to be repeated. LOLGOP
94	That empty bag on the floor? Hillary used to keep her fucks in it.
95	The Democrats were terrific yesterday.
96	Let’s face it, the pattern is that we only elect Dems when there are massive crises.
97	I had no idea they were so bad, and I had no idea our people were so good.
98	Accused of treason; bitches about the ratings. I am in awe.
99	Our job is not to persuade Republicans but to defeat them.
100	How do you get liars to care about the truth?
101	This whole shit show is a house of cards and when it goes, it won’t be stopped.

Hi god, it’s us. Thanks a heap, you’re having a great week and it’s only Thursday!

It’s always darkest before the other shoe drops.

The rest of the comments were smacking Boebert like she was a piñata.

If marriage is the equivalent of selling yourself into slavery, women with self respect should reject the offer.

Republicans got rid of McCarthy. Democrats chose not to save him.

Bad people in a position to do bad things will do bad things because they are bad people. End of story.

I was confident that someone would point it out and thought why not me.

Incompetence, fear, or corruption? why not all three?

The press swings at every pitch, we don’t have to.

Sadly, there is no cure for stupid.

Is it negotiation when the other party actually wants to shoot the hostage?

We’ve had enough carrots to last a lifetime. break out the sticks.

One lie, alone, tears the fabric of reality.

He seems like a smart guy, but JFC, what a dick!

Speaker Mike Johnson is a vile traitor to the House and the Constitution.

Quote tweet friends, screenshot enemies.

This must be what justice looks like, not vengeful, just peaceful exuberance.

🎶 Those boots were made for mockin’ 🎵

The lights are all blinking red.

Fight for a just cause, love your fellow man, live a good life.

Take hopelessness and turn it into resilience.

Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

I have other things to bitch about but those will have to wait.

“What are Republicans afraid of?” Everything.

Rotating Tag Nominations