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1 |
This is the way. |
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2 |
I have spoken. |
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3 |
McConnell is a turtle-faced, fascist sack of shit who doesn’t believe in the United States Constitution. |
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4 |
Balloon Juice is such a weird place. |
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5 |
We ended up with transgender bathrooms instead of flying cars. |
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6 |
A sufficient plurality of insane, greedy people can tank any democratic system ever devised. |
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7 |
When your President is a carnival barker, you’re going to have a circus. |
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8 |
Alternate: When your President is a carnival barker, you’re going to have a bunch of rubes. |
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9 |
The taproot of bigotry is the seeking of unfair advantage; libs are suckers for thinking otherwise. |
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10 |
The GOP is FUBAR. |
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11 |
Cole is an eldest child, so he has no idea how a little love can avert pooping in the hallway to the bathroom. |
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12 |
Balloon Juice, never a refuge for the linguistically delicate. |
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13 |
Trump is going to draw a dick on that dog with a Sharpie before this is all over, isn’t he? (Betty Cracker) |
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14 |
Fuck these fucking interesting times. |
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15 |
“Yeah, well, you know, that’s just, like, your opinion, man.” |
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16 |
Think of it like Cole’s new house – you walk in and find Walter, but then you fall through a hole in the front porch. |
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17 |
Meth, This Site Is ON It! |
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18 |
Nevertheless, she persisted. |
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19 |
“Fortunately nobody else was home, and we have no rabbit. |
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20 |
… and don’t forget to hydrate |
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21 |
These assholes make me want to scoop out my eyes with a melon baller and jam chopsticks through my eardrums right now. |
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22 |
Fuck it, we’ll do it live! |
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23 |
All I wanted from the trip was a t-shirt, and I got this shitty president, instead….. |
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24 |
Yeah, two fucking people in their 70s on the ticket. That is brilliant. |
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Alternate: two people in their 70s on the ticket. That is brilliant. |
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26 |
He’s the index to the cookbook, except no one has written any of the recipes. |
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27 |
Alternate: He’s the index to the cookbook with no recipes. |
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28 |
It costs a lot to look this cheap. – Dolly Parton |
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29 |
I was told there would be no math on this blog. |
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30 |
You must be this old to comment here. |
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31 |
I’m never afraid, and I’m rarely surprised. |
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32 |
Alternate: Never afraid and rarely surprised. |
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33 |
Tunch is not fat; he is floofy. (Alternate: Steve is not fat; he is floofy.) |
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34 |
Fuckem. |
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35 |
Wow, I can’t imagine what it was like to comment in Morse Code. |
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36 |
Fuck it and drive on. |
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37 |
What does the Orange Concealer, conceal? |
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38 |
Let there be snark. |
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39 |
The president is a whiny little bitch. |
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40 |
A blogocracy, not a democracy. |
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41 |
I heartily endorse this thread or product. |
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42 |
Nothing but Malarkey served here. |
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43 |
all things trump… expensive, but cheap looking |
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44 |
Jackals Assemble. |
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45 |
Alternate: The Day of The Jackal |
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46 |
Shocking, but not surprising |
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47 |
In a more just world, the clouds would listen. |
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48 |
The Willow is too close to the house. |
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49 |
It’s always darkest before the other shoe drops. |
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50 |
… never a haven… |
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51 |
It’s getting to be ri-goddamn-diculous” |
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52 |
I’m only here for the duck photos. |
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53 |
Not even wrong. |
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54 |
The cruelty is the point, the law be damned. |
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55 |
Get your facts first, and then you can distort them as much as you please. -Mark Twain |
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56 |
Orange is the new blech. |
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57 |
It’s the corruption, stupid. |
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58 |
Andrew Sullivan should be ashamed of himself. |
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59 |
The DNC server is in West By God Virginia! |
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60 |
Touched by his noodly tentacle. |
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61 |
Eating tire rims and anthrax since 2009. |
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62 |
STFU, Donnie. You’re out of your element. |
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63 |
Stable genius just took my bookbag. |
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64 |
100% fewer Trump cameos than Home Alone 2! |
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65 |
Not the face! |
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66 |
RTMFA |
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67 |
Where the deer and the antelope play… warily. |
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68 |
Don’t forget to hyphenate! |
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69 |
Lindsay Graham is the Mike Pompeo of Steve Mnuchins |
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70 |
aww, blow it out your ass. |
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71 |
Something is very wrong. |
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72 |
Reader, I declined to engage further. |
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73 |
Backup wives! This really is a full service blog. |
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74 |
When I decide to be condescending, you won’t have to dream up a fantasy about it. |
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75 |
Actual thoughts and prayers. |
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76 |
We’re a forward looking blog. |
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77 |
We’ll see if the cats can be herded. As you know they bolt if anyone picks up a laser pointer. |
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78 |
I’d try pessimism, but it probably wouldn’t work. |
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79 |
Can you imagine what it is like to be a person who sacrificed their integrity for… Donald Trump. |
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80 |
No one sacrificed their integrity for Donald Dump; they simply revealed their lack of it. |
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81 |
The condom would be for the pig. |
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82 |
To sum up, the whole situation is shitty. |
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83 |
Blow me. |
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84 |
That’s a lot of pomposity based on a personal anecdote and a semester of college. |
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85 |
Balloon Juice p0rn = grumpy detectives |
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86 |
You don’t have to go to every argument you’re invited to, especially when the other guy has already made up his mind. |
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87 |
I am annoyed by this translation |
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88 |
You’re a liberal hack I’m not talking to you |
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89 |
if senate republicans had any shame they’d die of it. |
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90 |
But I do respect the idea that in a country this fat, stupid, white, racist, sexist, and complacent, the way out might have to run through Joe Biden. |
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91 |
Everyone is the hero in the movie that is their life. |
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92 |
Republican senators in Impeachment Hearing: 52 toddlers squirming in Time Out. |
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93 |
Republicans don’t lie to be believed. They lie to be repeated. LOLGOP |
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94 |
That empty bag on the floor? Hillary used to keep her fucks in it. |
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95 |
The Democrats were terrific yesterday. |
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96 |
Let’s face it, the pattern is that we only elect Dems when there are massive crises. |
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97 |
I had no idea they were so bad, and I had no idea our people were so good. |
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98 |
Accused of treason; bitches about the ratings. I am in awe. |
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99 |
Our job is not to persuade Republicans but to defeat them. |
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100 |
How do you get liars to care about the truth? |
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101 |
This whole shit show is a house of cards and when it goes, it won’t be stopped. |
Come for the politics, stay for the snark.
You are so fucked. Still, I wish you the best of luck.
You cannot shame the shameless.
Fight them, without becoming them!
I would try pessimism, but it probably wouldn’t work.
Republican speaker of the house Mike Johnson is the bland and smiling face of evil.
GOP baffled that ‘we don’t care if you die’ is not a winning slogan.
You passed on an opportunity to be offended? What are you even doing here?
“Everybody’s entitled to be an idiot.”
Not so fun when the rabbit gets the gun, is it?
The republican ‘Pastor’ of the House is an odious authoritarian little creep.
You don’t get rid of your umbrella while it’s still raining.
I might just take the rest of the day off and do even more nothing than usual.
President Musk and Trump are both poorly raised, coddled 8 year old boys.
Republicans: “Abortion is murder but you can take a bus to get one.” Easy peasy.
The unpunished coup was a training exercise.
The republican speaker is a slippery little devil.
“In the future, this lab will be a museum. do not touch it.”
Dear media: perhaps we ought to let Donald Trump speak for himself!
And now I have baud making fun of me. this day can’t get worse.
Some judge needs to shut this circus down soon.
In my day, never was longer.
… pundit janitors mopping up after the gop
Trump should be leading, not lying.
If America since Jan 2025 hasn’t broken your heart, you haven’t loved her enough.
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