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A last alliance of elves and men. also pet photos.

After roe, women are no longer free.

A sufficient plurality of insane, greedy people can tank any democratic system ever devised, apparently.

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In my day, never was longer.

Speaking of republicans, is there a way for a political party to declare intellectual bankruptcy?

Wow, I can’t imagine what it was like to comment in morse code.

Wow, you are pre-disappointed. How surprising.

I really should read my own blog.

It’s time for the GOP to dust off that post-2012 autopsy, completely ignore it, and light the party on fire again.

Conservatism: there are some people the law protects but does not bind and others who the law binds but does not protect.

Nothing worth doing is easy.

Despite his magical powers, I don’t think Trump is thinking this through, to be honest.

When someone says they “love freedom”, rest assured they don’t mean yours.

Their freedom requires your slavery.

I did not have this on my fuck 2022 bingo card.

Is it irresponsible to speculate? It is irresponsible not to.

Sitting here in limbo waiting for the dice to roll

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Come on, man.

Americans barely caring about Afghanistan is so last month.

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It’s the corruption, stupid.

Putting aside our relentless self-interest because the moral imperative is crystal clear.

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Teabagger Stupidity

You are here: Home / Archives for Teabagger Stupidity

Let’s Just Pretend We’re Not Bigots

by John Cole|  January 24, 20177:07 pm| 180 Comments

This post is in: Hail to the Hairpiece, Just Shut the Fuck Up, Teabagger Stupidity

So since a ban on Muslims is too unpalatable politically, unadulterated and uncondensed shitweasel Ted Cruz has come up with a new idea:

Two Republican lawmakers on Tuesday introduced a measure that would let governors bar refugees from their states.

The State Refugee Security Act requires the federal government to notify a state at least 21 days before resettling a refugee there. Under the law, governors could block refugees from being resettled in their states unless federal officials can provide “adequate assurance” that the individual doesn’t pose a security threat.

Sen. Ted Cruz (R-Texas) and Rep. Ted Poe (R-Texas) reintroduced the bill this week, after initially pushing it late last year in the previous Congress. Sen. Richard Shelby (R-Ala.) is co-sponsoring the measure.

“The first obligation of the president is to keep this country safe as commander in chief,” Cruz said in a statement. “I am encouraged that, unlike the previous administration, one of President Trump’s top priorities is to defeat radical Islamic terrorism.”

Cruz has long criticized U.S. efforts to resettle Muslims fleeing conflict in Syria and Iraq, arguing that terrorists could use the resettlement program as a sort of Trojan horse to enter the U.S. He has suggested resettling only Christian refugees from the region, arguing that members of the Islamic State in Iraq and Syria would not try to hide among Christians.

This way, they can wrap up rejecting scary Muslims under the auspices of “safety and security” rather than them being icky heathens. Unfortunately, this bill will not address the movement of members of the Christianist intifada that is actually terrorizing America.

Bonus fact- this bill still does nothing but make bigots feel good. First, even if the governors of heavily gomerized states like Alabama and Texas ban the resettling of immigrants for whatever reason they come up with on the spot, these are people, not fucking objects. They aren’t inert objects like the Statue of Liberty or Ted Cruz’s conscience. So once an immigrant is welcomed into a state with actual human beings like New York or California, guess what? THEY CAN CROSS FUCKING STATE LINES, just like guns. And why the fuck would they want to go to Texas anyway? They can livestream SXSW, which is the only reason I can think of for wanting to go there.

Bonus fact #2: The President’s first duty isn’t to protect Americans. It’s to uphold the Constitution. You know, that old piece of paper they routinely wipe their ass with when they introduce bills like this,

Let’s Just Pretend We’re Not BigotsPost + Comments (180)

The Takes- THEY ARE SO HOT

by John Cole|  January 24, 20176:07 pm| 97 Comments

This post is in: The War On Women, Vagina Outrage, Just Shut the Fuck Up, Teabagger Stupidity

Full time douche canoe and State Senator Chris McDaniel took to facebook with this bit of idiocy:

He’s proud of that, too! A couple of quick things:

1.) The protests were not about free birth control.

2.) This is when you can tell they are spooked- when all they have is dumbassery to puke up. You’ve no doubt seen some of the other crap the wingnuts have tried- pictures of trash left behind after the march gasping about dirty liberals, idiots wondering “what did it accomplish,” or others barfing up stuff like “what if they had not spent money on tickets and donated it to women’s shelters” and on and on. When you see that, what you should recognize is that the protests worked and it unnerved them. They have no response, so rather than confront the issue head on, they’ll bicker around the edges.

3.) And I am sure David Anderson aka Richard Mayhew will chime in, but for now, THIS IS NOT HOW INSURANCE WORKS. INSURANCE IS NOT FREE SHIT. INSURANCE IS SOMETHING WE ALL PAY INTO TO HAVE THINGS COVERED.

So when women mention that birth control should be covered by insurance, it’s not because they want free shit, it’s because they want their health needs treated equally to men’s health needs. Additionally, while called “birth control,” birth control isn’t just for stopping unwanted pregnancies.

So a hearty middle finger to the full time penis impersonator from Mississippi, who not only is an asshole, but a stupid asshole who doesn’t even know what health insurance is and how it works.

The Takes- THEY ARE SO HOTPost + Comments (97)

Modern “Conservatism” In One Screen Shot

by John Cole|  September 26, 201610:02 am| 202 Comments

This post is in: Election 2016, Clown Shoes, Teabagger Stupidity

Ole Larry O’Connor at Hot Air is all het up and having a bad day:

gladwehaveourprioritiesstraight

He concludes: “Hillary posts pages of documented Trump lies” and holds a conference call with members of the media detailing the same theme and within 48 hours major publications print articles following along with Hillary’s prescribed narrative.

Yup, total coincidence.”

And there you have it. Rather than being concerned about the fact that Donald Trump’s past is so full of toxic lies it could be an EPA Superfund site, he’s upset that Trump is a victim of the media (a notion which is in and of itself utter nonsense).

Priorities!

Modern “Conservatism” In One Screen ShotPost + Comments (202)

Let’s Help Make Lea Hudson of Cheatham County, Tennessee Internet Famous!

by John Cole|  September 20, 20165:52 pm| 61 Comments

This post is in: Assholes, General Stupidity, Just Shut the Fuck Up, Teabagger Stupidity

This is what counts as thinking from the wingnut community:

“Any park ranger will tell you: don’t feed wildlife. The reason behind this is that they become dependent and will not forage for themselves any longer. A disturbing trend is affecting American wildlife. Animals that formerly were self-sufficient are now showing signs of belonging to the Democratic Party. They have apparently learned to just sit and wait for the government to step in and provide for their care and sustenance.” (The Unpopular Truth, March 14, 2012)

Isn’t this what Hillary and the Democratic Party are doing — continuing to make more and more people dependent by continuing to “feed them?”

Food stamps, children’s lunch programs, child care programs, housing subsidies, farm subsidies, student loans — the list is endless.

In fact, there are over 1,800 social welfare programs funded by hard-working taxpayers to the tune of hundreds of billions of dollars.

Let’s skip past the fact that she is talking about people, and not animals, and in many of those cases CHILDREN who can’t provide for themselves (wonder where she stands on abortion). All of that is deplorable, but let’s watch where this goes next:

Folks, this is the most important election of our time — we must stop the pathway the Democrats/Socialists are leading us down.

Our grandchildren don’t stand a chance! Will working for a living become obsolete? Will the rest of us who have worked hard for our whole lives find our ability to hang onto what we have impossible?

Will we lose our basic freedoms like the Second Amendment, freedom of religion and freedom of speech?

So please don’t feed the animals. America deserves better. We all deserve better!

We have to stop feeding hungry kids to defend our grandkids who might lose their right to own a gun. This is what government by your grandfather’s chain emails looks like.

It will not surprise you that darling Lea is all in for Trump, will it?

Let’s Help Make Lea Hudson of Cheatham County, Tennessee Internet Famous!Post + Comments (61)

Rope a Bunch of Dopes

by John Cole|  July 1, 20161:09 pm| 448 Comments

This post is in: Election 2016, Clown Shoes, Teabagger Stupidity

hills

Here is today’s Clinton “scandal” news:

Attorney General Loretta E. Lynch, conceding that her airport meeting with former President Bill Clinton this week had cast a shadow over a federal investigation of Hillary Clinton’s personal email account, said Friday that she would accept whatever recommendations that career prosecutors and the F.B.I. director make about whether to bring charges in the case.

“I will accept their recommendations,” Ms. Lynch said in an appearance at the Aspen Ideas Festival. She said that “the case will be resolved by the same team that has been working on it from the beginning.”

The attorney general said she had decided several months ago to defer to the recommendations of her staff and of the director of the F.B.I. because her status as a political appointee sitting in judgment on a politically charged case would raise questions of a conflict of interest.

The meeting with Mr. Clinton, she acknowledged, only deepened those questions, and she said she felt compelled to publicly explain her reasoning to try to put concerns to rest.

Here’s how I’m betting this will play out. The FBI is not going to recommend any charges for several reasons. First, I don’t think she did anything criminal. Second, the FBI is not going to charge a major political candidate in the middle of an election cycle, because to do so would forever taint the FBI as a partisan organization, and no Democrat would ever have any faith in them to be independent whatsoever. Also, their budget comes from elected office, and they aren’t going to stretch the rules or bend over backwards to find some bullshit reason to charge her. They just aren’t.

If the FBI does anything, it will issue some long report with a bunch of mealy mouthed bullshit, the investigative version of “mistakes were made,” and say that while she did not do anything illegal or criminal she did something improper. This will then give them defense against the right, who also fund their budget and do not want to be left with nothing. They will then recommend a bunch of changes to policy regarding this to all levels of government in regards to email protocols and security.

The Republicans, having just demanded that Loretta Lynch recuse herself for… reasons, will then have no way to demand that she do something additional to HRC, because, as we know, she has recused herself and has nothing to do with the process. And thus, E-Mail Benghazi: Electric Boogaloo, will come to an end with some short term yelling and fauxtrage on Fox, some hysterics among the Infowars sect, and some smug tweets coming from secure pockets of true progressive Bernistan. I’ll note for posterity that these are increasingly overlapped areas in a Venn diagram. Who knows, maybe Dan Burton will videotape himself shooting a server in his backyard.

A very cynical person might even think that Bill Clinton intentionally publicly met with AG Lynch in a private airplane. Someone has spent some time perfecting their Kung Fu under our swarthy Jedi overlord.

Rope a Bunch of DopesPost + Comments (448)

That Was Money Well Spent

by John Cole|  June 28, 201611:59 am| 207 Comments

This post is in: Clown Shoes, Teabagger Stupidity

Holy nothingburgers, batman:

Ending one of the longest, costliest and most bitterly partisan congressional investigations in history, the House Select Committee on Benghazi issued its final report on Tuesday, finding no new evidence of culpability or wrongdoing by Hillary Clinton in the 2012 attacks in Libya that left four Americans dead.

The 800-page report, however, included some new details about the night of the attacks, and the context in which it occurred, and it delivered a broad rebuke of government agencies like the Defense Department, the Central Intelligence Agency and the State Department — and the officials who led them — for failing to grasp the acute security risks in the Libyan city, and especially for maintaining outposts in Benghazi that they could not protect.

The committee, led by Representative Trey Gowdy, Republican of South Carolina, also harshly criticized an internal State Department investigation that it said had allowed officials like Mrs. Clinton, then the secretary of state, to effectively choose who would investigate their actions. In addition, it reiterated Republicans’ complaints that the Obama administration had sought to thwart the investigation by withholding witnesses and evidence.

The report, however, did not dispute that United States military forces stationed in Europe could not have reached Benghazi in time to rescue the personnel who died — a central finding of previous inquiries.

Seven million well spent, you wankers.

That Was Money Well SpentPost + Comments (207)

Sweet Goodbyes

by John Cole|  June 15, 20164:12 pm| 73 Comments

This post is in: Teabagger Stupidity

Hot damned this CEO is furious with Sam Brownback, and pens a letter telling us exactly what is the matter with Kansas and why his growing company is getting the hell out of there:

Kansas has become a test center of “trickle down” economics, espoused by economist Arthur Laffer during the Reagan years. Nowhere has there been as thorough an implementation of Laffer’s policy recommendations… and nowhere has there been as dramatic a failure of government.

Under Brownback’s direction, Kansas implemented an unprecedented tax cut in 2012, eliminating taxes for LLCs and professional firms (for full disclosure, PHI is a C Corporation) and making the largest cuts in the highest tax brackets. He shifted taxes to create a heavier burden on property and sales taxes, which typically represent a larger burden on lower income brackets. Brownback declared that this tax cut would be a “shot of adrenaline” for the Kansas economy, but the reality is that the tax cuts have had the opposite effect. Kansas lags neighboring states in job growth. For 11 of the last 12 months, Kansas has dramatically missed revenue targets, falling deeper in debt and facing another round of degraded bond ratings.

The worst part is that the burdens for the shortfalls rest on the shoulders of those who can least afford it – children and the developmentally disabled.

One of Brownback’s first actions was to close the Lawrence office for Kansas Social & Rehabilitation Services (SRS). This agency provided services for low-income children and the developmentally disabled, and access to the Lawrence office was critical for people in that community to receive services. Their only option was to try to figure out how to get transportation to the Topeka SRS office, thirty miles away. Not an easy task. The closure of the Lawrence office was supposed to save the state $400,000 per year.

At the same time, Brownback decided to pursue a personal vendetta against the Kansas Bioscience Authority, an organization created to spur the economic development of bioscience companies in Kansas. Brownback was convinced that funds were being misused, so he decided we needed to spend over $400,000 (conveniently, the same amount that could have kept the Lawrence SRS office open) on lawyers and auditors to pour over the KBA books. In the end, they found a total of $5,000 in misused funds, which the former KBA president repaid with a personal check. It all came down to priorities – pursue a personal vendetta at the expense of the disabled.

The developmentally disabled continued to suffer when Brownback’s administration pushed a program to privatize the state’s Medicaid program KanCare while at the same time refusing millions of dollars in federal support to expand Medicaid services. Now, three insurance companies administer KanCare as a profit center, and the results are dramatic – significant delays in determining eligibility, inexplicable loss of coverage, caseloads increased, providers struggling to get paid.

At the beginning of 2016, over 17,000 Medicaid applications were waiting for approval, 8,000 of which were well beyond the federally mandated 45-day threshold for processing. Pregnant women, who would have received services by default under the previous Medicaid plan in Kansas, were now waiting 4+ months for services, often exceeding the term of their pregnancy by the time services were authorized.

The funding problems got so bad that Osawatomie State Hospital’s mental health ward had to significantly cut staffing. Over 40% of their staff positions were dormant, leaving the remaining staff overworked and unprepared. This understaffing resulted in an improperly released patient murdering a 61-year-old man, and a hospital worker was raped, having to rely on other patients to save her. In January 2016, the Osawatomie State Hospital lost its certification to provide mental health services, cutting off federal funding that counted for roughly half of the hospital’s revenue. It is unclear what will happen to the patients and staff at Osawatomie State Hospital, leaving the fates of the patients in limbo.

The state’s public education system, once considered one of the best in the nation, hasn’t been spared, either. You’ll hear claims from Kansas officials that funding to education is at an all time high, but it’s just an accounting trick – they chose to shuffle money for special education and retirement funds through the schools so it could appear as an increase on the books. Salary freezes, underfunding to the point of being ruled unconstitutional, laws allowing teachers to be imprisoned for introducing potentially “offensive” content, cuts and delays in $100 million in payments to the state-run retirement fund, and legislation specifically targeted to cripple the Kansas teacher’s union are all part of an ongoing effort to undermine the public education system in Kansas. Instead, the Brownback administration plans to offer vouchers to encourage families to send their children to private and religious schools.

To double down on these policies, Brownback is now ignoring the $250 million shortfall predicted for 2016, instead opting for headlines about closing Kansas to refugees and blaming the “liberal media” for the state’s economic woes.

Republicans are what is wrong with Kansas.

via the Great Orange Satan)

Sweet GoodbyesPost + Comments (73)

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