Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

fuckem (in honor of the late great efgoldman)

So fucking stupid, and still doing a tremendous amount of damage.

We can’t confuse what’s necessary to win elections with the policies that we want to implement when we do.

So very ready.

You know it’s bad when the Project 2025 people have to create training videos on “How To Be Normal”.

Whoever he was, that guy was nuts.

Republicans: “Abortion is murder but you can take a bus to get one.” Easy peasy.

Sometimes the world just tells you your cat is here.

Fucking consultants! (of the political variety)

Our messy unity will be our strength.

The real work of an opposition party is to oppose.

If America since Jan 2025 hasn’t broken your heart, you haven’t loved her enough.

The only way through is to slog through the muck one step at at time.

Fuck these fucking interesting times.

Within six months Twitter will be fully self-driving.

If senate republicans had any shame, they’d die of it.

Fight them, without becoming them!

Why is it so hard for them to condemn hate?

This has so much WTF written all over it that it is hard to comprehend.

They don’t have outfits that big. nor codpieces that small.

This really is a full service blog.

Those who are easily outraged are easily manipulated.

Stamping your little feets and demanding that they see how important you are? Not working anymore.

Proof that we need a blogger ethics panel.

You are here: Home / Music / Thursday Night Open Thread: Breathe

Reader Interactions

143Comments

  5. 5.

    reality-based (the original, not the troll)

    elder-care. It keeps getting harder. The thing about 92-year-old Norwegians (my Mom) – they are every bit as stubborn as 80 year old Norwegians – just much less rational!

  12. 12.

    marc

    It’s the strangest thing. I was never a big fan of The Cranberries, but I had their debut CD from many years back (college). A couple of months ago, I listened to it over and over. In the subsequent few weeks, I’ve bought three more Cranberries CDs and two Dolores O’Riordan solo albums. This is the first time I’ve seen a Cranberries video in a couple of decades, I bet.

  16. 16.

    MomSense

    Had a really upsetting call from the neighborhood jerk saying that I needed to go to some committee to get permission to replace the rotting planks on my deck. I told him to stuff it.

    Same guy wrote a nasty cease and desist letter about letting my dog run off leash unattended at night. They said she was getting into their trash and setting off their motion sensors. Only problem is that I have never let my dog run off leash unattended, day or night.

    There is a fox den behind his house. Idiot. He also donated the Condoleeza Rice memoir to our free library stand. Double idiot.

    Taking a breath is probably a good idea for me. I’m going to do some tai chi and see if I feel better.

  17. 17.

    Suzanne

    I am exhausted.

    In better news, Spawn has had two days of melatonin and Lexapro, and she has gotten two solid nights of sleep, which hasn’t happened in a very long time. She greeted me when I got home in a ninja getup. It was hilarious.

  21. 21.

    redshirt

    Wow. I’ve heard this song like a 1000 times but never seen the video. Powerful stuff.

    Reminds me that the Democratic Senate Majority Leader from Maine, George Mitchell, was instrumental in bringing peace to Northern Ireland.

  23. 23.

    reality-based (the original, not the troll)

    @SarahT: you know it. Or “Uff Da!”, as we say up here in NoDak.

    Today’s battle: “no, Mom, I have to keep the aspirin bottle, because I bought you a bottle of 50 tablets 12 days ago – see, Mom, I marked it on the calendar – and it’s gone! ”

    (at which point I am accused of lying, making the whole thing up, etc. )

    (Her two favorite activities – taking an aspirin and cleaning her false teeth – the Polident that woman goes through, cleaning her teeth 4 or 5 times a day! (they fit fine)

    My PLAN was to sidestep the battle by refilling her aspirin bottle with “half-Prin” – same size tabs, half strength – she’d never know the difference – only they quit making it! –

  27. 27.

    MomSense

    @marc:

    Randomly their song Linger will get stuck in my head and linger for a few days. It happens about every five years or so.

  29. 29.

    MattF

    My theory about singers in popular music has been that they are combinations of lyricism and force; Dolores O’Riordan is the example of force.

  30. 30.

    dexwood

    @SarahT:
    I’ll raise you one 88 year old Native American mother ( in-law ). Some of these venerable Pueblo women can give The Look.

  31. 31.

    MomSense

    @redshirt:

    I don’t know. Two members of the stupid HOA board told me it is considered maintenance and not to worry. I told him that and he said he was going to measure it in the morning and call the town code enforcement officer. That’s when I told him to stuff it and not to step foot in my back yard. Jeez. I know the code officer well so I’ll call him. This is a ground level deck. It’s not anything fancy.

  36. 36.

    Anne Laurie

    @Omnes Omnibus: I am so stealing that!

    Terry Pratchett on clowns:

    “No clowns were funny. That was the whole purpose of a clown. People laughed at clowns, but only out of nervousness. The point of clowns was that, after watching them, anything else that happened seemed enjoyable”

  37. 37.

    Jay Noble

    While doing some research on local 1956 history, I ran across a neat little story. Presidential election was near and article reminded people that in Nebraska, if you lived in a city/town of less than 7,000 you didn’t have to REGISTER to vote. Not. Even. Register. and. Vote.

    More or less same population size now as then but now I routinely get the Voter ID memes from the frothing at the mouth locals. When the whole town knows everyone’s business how is some one going to sneak in and cast a vote?

  40. 40.

    jl

    Just listened to a certain candidate… um… I mean political revolutionist, give an hour plus speech at a rally in OR.
    He’s supposed to be running against somebody, but only mentioned her in passing twice,
    He said that he wants her to join his political revolution.
    The primary campaigns this year have become very odd.

  41. 41.

    MattF

    @raven: I went to their DC-area “Harrow and Harvest’ tour performance some years ago– At one point G and D were playing verrrry slooowly and it occured to me that if someone walked into the performance at that point, they’d have wondered just what the hell was going on.

    G and D are great, period.

  42. 42.

    Major Major Major Major

    some berniebro sealion tried to tell me and my friend that he’s a scientist so we should listen to him during a FB squabble about which candidate is better on LGBT and women’s issues. he had to be gently reminded that me and her are both scientists…

    anywho, now i’m about to watch bob’s burgers right after i read the thread.

  44. 44.

    Gracie10

    I rarely post but I lurk every day.

    Fuck April. This entire month (and the last few days of March) has been a shitshow and I’ll be glad when it’s over.

    Things were gliding along nicely. My depression well-managed and my life fairly balanced until the end of March, when I was assaulted (groped) and needed to deal with a completely separate and fairly major personal crisis. Then a close friend committed suicide a couple weeks ago.

    I’m going to a suicide support group. Anyone ever been to one of those? What should I expect? Any books or other resources? I know time is important but I feel like I need to be an active mourner right now.

    Thanks for reading my vent.

  47. 47.

    Mike J

    @Omnes Omnibus:

    This is not a calming song. May as well have been about clowns.

    I was very disappointed I couldn’t find the original video for Invisible Sun by the Police, which addresses the same topic. Not Clowns. Ireland.

  48. 48.

    SarahT

    @Gracie10: Christ. All I can say is hang in there – you’re doing the right thing by going to group. Keep reaching out, even to random blog people. Please.

  49. 49.

    redshirt

    @Omnes Omnibus: I actually think its a good song per the topic. The Bernie v. Hillary wars have been raging for a while, and like Catholicism v. Protestantism, what’s the big difference, really? But as all true believers can argue forever, so we argued. Until this past Tuesday and thank FSM the UNLIMITED VICTORY is clear. Hurray!

    UNLIMITED ZOMBIE!

  50. 50.

    Omnes Omnibus

    @Gracie10: Reach out to anyone and any place that you can. I have never been there. I have no expertise at all in this but still… People here will help if they can – even if just reading is all we can do.

  54. 54.

    SiubhanDuinne

    @Gracie10:

    First, thank you for reaching out to this unknown, virtual (but loving and supportive) community. What a dreadful few weeks you have had. Mourning writes its own rules, so rant, weep, curse, rage, or sit in stony dry-eyed silence, as you are moved. Please don’t try to force an emotion that doesn’t feel authentic. It will happen in its own time and in its own way. I hope you’ll accept an Internet {{{hug}}}, and I hope (and believe) happier times are ahead.

  56. 56.

    Miss Bianca

    @Omnes Omnibus: It’s close. Zombies are like clowns, only their make-up is even scarier.

    @redshirt: I’m not frightened by them anymore. When I was a kid they terrified me. Then I felt guilty because I thought I was supposed to think they were funny and cute. I felt like I was failing something, or someone, with my inappropriate reaction. So, I’m actually kind of relieved to find out that I was not alone.

  62. 62.

    redshirt

    @marc: I’m developing a theory that the entirety of a person is a collection of habits. Nothing more. Your particular experiences make your habits specific to your life, and as such everyone is a unique individual.

  63. 63.

    Miss Bianca

    @Gracie10: Never been to a suicide support group. The only times I was ever in that dark place I had enough sense of self-preservation to hie myself straight to a therapist. One of whom really helped, and some of whom just irritated me to the point of seeking other help. Anti-depressants helped the last time around.

    Sometimes…just the comfort of writing aloud to a sympathetic forum can help. : )

    Hope that *this* helps. Luck and peace to you.

  67. 67.

    David ?Canadian Anchor Baby? Koch

    RIOT!

    Protesters try to overturn Costa Mesa patrol car outside Trump rally (Photo)

    Live video feed of riot (Link)

  69. 69.

    Miss Bianca

    @marc: Did Dolores O’Riordan end up singing with Solas? Or am I thinking of someone else?

    I knew very little about the Cranberries – missed them mostly in their heyday – but Radio Paradise plays this one fairly frequently, and so I often find it going thru’ my head when I least expect it.

    ETA: Never seen this video, now I’m having flashbacks to Belfast, touring the Troubles sites with my friend Sean, having him point out the names of all his friends and family on the wall on the West Side…

  71. 71.

    seaboogie

    @Omnes Omnibus:

    about clowns…

    I dressed up as a clown once for a grand opening of a coffee shop in The Beaches neighborhood in Toronto. I had done their window displays and in-store merchandising, and was asked to help out for the event itself. So I did, and discovered how liberating it was to be in costume – so not myself, as I am usually fairly inhibited.

    After the event, the owner drove me home, and – as we were paused at a stop-light – a fellow was crossing the cross-walk with a balloon in his hand. He saw me, came over to the car – and gave me his balloon. A very sweet moment.

  76. 76.

    ? Martin

    @David ?Canadian Anchor Baby? Koch: Worth noting, Costa Mesa is a bit of a mess politically. A bit conservative, bordered by a very wealthy white community (Newport Beach) on one side and a heavily latino, low income community (Santa Ana) on the other. Looks like Santa Ana turned out in force.

    And pretty much nobody likes the Costa Mesa government or police, so any excuse to fuck with them will be taken.

  78. 78.

    Omnes Omnibus

    @seaboogie: Fuckers scare me, Just saying. I have happily jumped out of multiple perfectly good airplanes, skied and climbed tall mountains, yet clowns scare me.

  80. 80.

    seaboogie

    @Gracie10: Sorry about all that you are dealing with, and glad that you have showed up to comment. Keep posting when you need/want to – there is a lot of support, empathy and experience here.

  82. 82.

    Miss Bianca

    @Omnes Omnibus: Still? Not just a childhood phobia?

    Now me, I’d rather face clowns than jump out of airplanes, but that’s what makes horse races…so to speak…

    @efgoldman: Don’t bother. They’re here.

  85. 85.

    Omnes Omnibus

    @Miss Bianca: Jumping out of a plane is wonderful. Or not. If you remotely entertained the the idea that it might be interesting, do it. If that never occurred to you, don’t.

  86. 86.

    seaboogie

    @Omnes Omnibus: I really do understand that – the mask of the disguise when you are up close and personal is very “othering”, and puts the civilian at a disadvantage.

  87. 87.

    Miss Bianca

    @Omnes Omnibus: Strangely, the thought of hang-gliding appeals to me, the thought of sky-diving terrifies me. I have no idea what that signifies, if anything.

  89. 89.

    ? Martin

    @efgoldman:

    At least the cops had the good sense not to shoot anybody.

    Yeah, to their credit they seem to be doing a pretty good job here and avoiding the opportunities to escalate.

  91. 91.

    reality-based (the original, not the troll)

    @SarahT: and dex – I second the tiny/fierce notion. My Mom is 5’1″, 100 lbs – I’m 5’8 – but she fixes those icy viking blue eyes on me, and I understand exactly how all those English monasteries got pillaged and Greenland got settled. In fact – I just realized – I have a tiny geriatric berserker on my hands!

  92. 92.

    Omnes Omnibus

    @Miss Bianca: Oh, it has meaning and some PhD student will use that kind of data for her/his research.

    Me, I am iffy about the hang-gliding contraptions. Parachutes have kept me alive many times.

  93. 93.

    SarahT

    @Gracie10: Bout to sleep but one last thought: As a longt-time lurker here you know that different people post on different schedules, but one of the best things about this place, IMHO, is that at any time, day or night, you know you’ll always find some caring, smart, and helpful people who want to listen when you want to talk. So please keep in touch. And please take care of yourself – you’re not alone.

  94. 94.

    Mike J

    @redshirt: I totally get The Clash as zen. Just too hard to hear one of their songs without being assaulted with a time and place. Literally the first time I ever listened to the Clash was the first time I was taught to run a mixing board. They sort of were the definition of punk (which was the definition “things can be different” (which was really important for the older brother of dying of cancer kid))). Very few bands I like more, but impossible to chill for me.

    And weirdly, my choice of Massive Attack means……..something, I can actually shut off my stupid brain (and that didn’t happen until my thirties). There used to not be many bands that made that possible. I loved a band to the point of driving twelve hours to see them in a club or hated like only a sixteen year old could. I’m old now. I can actually hear a top forty song and say, “I don’t give a shit.” I don’t have to hate it and I don’t have to learn every solo.

  95. 95.

    Miss Bianca

    @Omnes Omnibus: Ah, well, ’tis all theoretical for me…I think it’s that hang-gliding seems more like sailing to me, and I adore sailing…

    Was you a parachuter in the Army, then?

  97. 97.

    SarahT

    @Mike J: Massive Attack rule. That is all. And they’re nice people. And now I’m going to pass out. G’Night to all BJers.

  98. 98.

    trollhattan

    @Miss Bianca:
    It was a neat event, alternating poetry and music with a Q&A afterwards. Aimee’s voice is impeccable live. Didn’t think I could be even more impressed by her.

  100. 100.

    Mike J

    @Miss Bianca:

    and I adore sailing

    Not in Seattle are you? I will sail with any balloon-juicer, your boat or my club’s. Too busy so far this year even though we’re had a dozen perfect days.

  101. 101.

    Omnes Omnibus

    @Miss Bianca: When I went into the army, my goals were to complete Officer Candidate School and Airborne School. I did both. After that, I was just doing a job.

  102. 102.

    Miss Bianca

    @Mike J: Nay, alas, land-locked in CO..considering how much I love and miss large bodies of water, it sometimes seems very weird to me that I ended up here. But if ever I get back out to Seattle I will give you a shout – that would be awesome!

  103. 103.

    Darkrose

    @Gracie10: I don’t know if this will help for you, but here’s something I found last year when I was suicidal that helped me:

    How To Not Kill Yourself Even When Everything Sucks

    I kept it bookmarked, and for about a month I read it every day at work.

    I’ve never been to a suicide specific support group, but I did some intensive therapy last year (Kaiser has problems, but they kick it into gear if you tell them you’re suicidal) and it helped get me through the worst of it. I’m still having depression and anxiety, but I feel like I’m able to manage them at the moment.

    Best wishes.

  104. 104.

    Miss Bianca

    @Omnes Omnibus: Just out of vulgar curiosity, what prompted you to go into the Army? Family tradition? My father was pushing me towards ROTC, but I was a bit too much of a hippie freak to consider it.

  105. 105.

    reality-based (the original, not the troll)

    @Gracie10:

    after a recent loss, a book that i found useful – in an extremely odd way – was “H is for Hawk” – it is peripherally about falconry, and that part is fascinating – but it is also about the mechanics of mourning, (the author’s father’s death sent her into a dangerous spiral) and her need to go to deep dark places of sorrow, and then finding one’s way back from them. Oh , I can’t explain it – but it is a great book if one is grieving. well, it’s a great book, period.

    Meanwhile, take care of yourself – in whatever way you need to. Hugs

  106. 106.

    Omnes Omnibus

    @efgoldman: Not really my concern. I wanted to and they let me. I am more proud of that badge than I am of any decoration or medal i got.

  108. 108.

    WaterGirl

    @MomSense: This asshole guy strikes me as the kind of guy who would also report you to the HOA if you didn’t replace your rotting boards! Upon further consideration, I have decided to go with asshole.

  112. 112.

    Mike J

    Boehner:

    “I have Democrat friends and Republican friends. I get along with almost everyone, but I have never worked with a more miserable son of a bitch in my life.”

    Press Secretary Josh Earnest[1]

    “Obviously, Speaker Boehner was speaking based on his own experience. I don’t know that he was looking to be helpful or harmful, I think he was just looking to be honest about his own view.”

    [1] Whose name can be transliterated to “kidding on the square”, but is his real live honest-to-god name.

  113. 113.

    seaboogie

    @Omnes Omnibus: Merci pour le francais.

    So when you are in disguise, you become free to act differently, and when you encounter even your familiars and they don’t know who you are, they are off balance. So yes, another story….

    When we kids and my Dad moved to a very small town in SW Ontario, we were kind of becoming integrated into this small community through the strong family and community ties of my Dad’s girlfriend, who would soon become his wife and our beloved step-mother.

    Halloween night…we have our bowl of treats, and some rube in full old-man mask and gloves and old man clothes shows up at the door. Doesn’t say a word. Dude steps into the tiny entry of our house, and starts scooping all of the candy out of the bowl. I’m all “John (my brother) this must be a friend of yours!”. Then the old man knocks on my Dad’s bedroom door (which is adjacent to the entryway), and I realize that this is Marilyn, my Dad’s girlfriend.

    She doffs her costume and we all have a good laugh. A little while later a guy shows up in civilan clothes and gorilla mask and hands, and we’re all like – come on in! And that is the first time that I met Marilyn’s Uncle Tim. A year later, I was in costume with Marilyn at her best friend’s house. We just rolled right on in, sat at their kitchen table and didn’t say a word. It took them longer than you’d think to figure out who we were.

    The disguise thing (even as a clown – and perhaps most especially so) is very disconcerting for those not in on the game.

  120. 120.

    seaboogie

    @Miss Bianca:

    Forgive me. My tongue does run away with me sometimes, for the sake of sportiveness.

    Is Mnem tracking this for one of her Regency novels?

  121. 121.

    Miss Bianca

    @efgoldman: I know, right? Actually, I was thinking about the oddness of using that term when one is really writing…and yet…

  123. 123.

    Miss Bianca

    Yes, well, on that note…methinks my tongue, which seems to have aroused such sudden and unholy interest, and I had better be off to bed.

    @Omnes Omnibus: Ah, two mice with but a single thought. Good night, to you and all.

  130. 130.

    Ruckus

    @Gracie10:
    Sorry for all the this.
    Go to the group. We all mourn in our own ways but really there aren’t that many really different ways. We all have to go through it when it happens around us. I’ll bet you’ll find companionship that makes the process easier to go through and deal with. You won’t know who it is and the person or persons may surprise you, but people will help. And surprise, you probably will end up helping someone else in some way.
    Let us know how it’s going, this is a pretty diverse group and there is always someone going through problems and someone with solutions. A virtual shoulder. There for support, to cry on and to help pull you up.
    ETA. This is not the same thing but something that happened to me Saturday may have some relevance. I went to a banquet for the sport I’ve participated and worked in professionally and one of the things that they do is to show pictures and names of those who have died since last years banquet. I found myself crying over about half the names. People I have known. We all mourn.

  132. 132.

    SectionH

    @Gracie10: You so don’t need to apologize.

    Groped? On top of the rest? Fuck it, get mad. Don’t give in to that shit. Do go to any helpful place that might be a start.

    I’ll tell you, I had an old dude grope me today – well, I don’t know what other word, because touch doesn’t define it, pat, no – grab, but not that either – well wtf ever, it wasn’t invited and it pissed me off a lot. If it had involved anything but mostly my shoulder, I’d probably been guilty of what the Brits call GBH, because I’m fucking fed up with that shit.

  133. 133.

    Gretchen

    Gracie: suicide support group is a great idea. Good luck with that. One of my dearest friends lost his wife to suicide. He just chugged on and wouldn’t look for any help, and I thought he and his little daughter would do better if they knew others dealing with the same thing. Good luck.

  136. 136.

    Paul in KY

    @MattF: For all: 6 more great Cranberries tunes: Salvation, Free to Decide, The Rebels, Loud & Clear, Just My Imagination, Raining in My Heart.

    Cannot go wrong with any of them.

  138. 138.

    The Very Reverend Crimson Fire of Compassion

    @Gracie10: I worked as a chaplain for hospice for over a decade. The best book I’ve ever run across for people who are in mourning is one called “Companion Through the Darkness.” by Stephanie Ericsson. In that period, I lost the single person I loved most for like, ten years in a row, every year (including my little brother). It got to the point that I was scared to get close to anyone, knowing that they would die. That book was the only thing I read during that period that felt like it was written by someone in the same place I was, who could help walk me through the pain. I’m so sorry for your loss. Everyone grieves differently. The only way to do it wrong is to avoid or numb it, ’cause that means it follows you around for the rest of your life. Give yourself permission to be as crazy as you need to in order to survive this, and let other people love you as well as they can.

  139. 139.

    Ruckus

    @The Very Reverend Crimson Fire of Compassion:
    I’ve told this here before. Someone wrote that the first time someone they knew died was when they were in their 40s. I responded that family members had been dying since I was 10. And doing so quite regularly ever since. From grandmothers to cousins of 6 months, to siblings, parents, friends, aunts, uncles…… It changes how you look at life. It never becomes easy, all these people being gone, but it becomes a bit more, well, acceptable. It is a normal part of life, but it doesn’t feel normal, it still hurts, they are still gone. It makes you appreciate those still here more. Give them more latitude for their faults, maybe try to fix some of your own, to make the time we have a bit better.

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