We’ve joked that the right-wing loves to play the victim, but our lady of perpetual outrage has kicked it up a notch and is now engaging in what can only be described as preemptive victimhood:
“Get ready for the anti-Tea Party sabotage and smear campaign”
For the next 9 days, the left-wing blogosphere and left-wing clueless pundits will hammer away with their unreality-based Tea Party smears.
And on the ground, the tax-subsidized and Soros-subsidized troops are going to try and wreak havoc every way they can. Many readers and fellow bloggers have seen signs that ACORN may send in ringers and saboteurs to usurp the anti-tax, anti-reckless spending, anti-bailout message.
ACORN and Soros plotting to usurp the anti-tax message. All you can do is laugh.
Hugh
Why do you give her links? It’s what she lives for!
Comrade Darkness
Where AM I supposed to send my address? I have not gotten my check from Soros and I could use it this month.
Zifnab
They’re going to pay attention to us, dammit. And when they do, expect nothing but negative attention. Expect to be vilified and crucified and hated and mocked. Because that’s when you know you’re absolutely right.
Don’t worry, my brave little Army of Davids. There’s one thing they won’t factor in, one thing they always forget when they pay attention to us. They don’t surround us. WE SURROUND THEM!
Pay attention to us, dammit!
jcricket
Does anyone think "Soros sponsored" is "weak tea" (pun intended) as a smear? I know asking them to understand their own hypocrisy (Scaife, Moon, Adelson) is too much, but who gives a crap that some rich guy named Soros gives some money to liberal people to write (which, of course, isn’t even true for most of the people Malkin is talking about).
I will quote the great philosopher Cheney, and say what we’re seeing here from the right-wing blogosphere is "death throes".
beltane
I keep hearing all this talk about George Soros subsidizing me for opposing the wingnuts’ master plan. Every day, I open my mailbox hoping to find a huge check from Soros or his illuminati assistants, and yet the check never arrives. What is Malkin’s explanation for this?
Dennis-SGMM
Who controls the British crown?
Who keeps the metric system down?
ACORN! ACORN!
Who leaves Atlantis off the maps?
Who keeps the Martians under wraps?
ACORN! ACORN!
Who holds back the electric car?
Who makes Steve Gutenberg a star?
ACORN! ACORN!
Who robs cavefish of their sight?
Who rigs every Oscar night?
ACORN! ACORN!
cleek
"saboteurs", ooh la la! your tea party must be so very important to have saboteurs!
that, or you’re suffering from delusions of grandeur.
jake 4 that 1
It’s TRUE. There was a message in my alphabet soup last night. This means we can trust no one!
Ripley
Many readers and fellow bloggers have seen signs that ACORN may send in ringers and saboteurs…
Really? Where have they seen this, Michelle? Care to offer some links or proof?
I thought so.
Ejoiner
Malkin is the master of reality judo:
By mocking her post you, John Cole, have now become a part of the growing backlash of the Left against the patriotic tea party movement. You laugh at her conspiracy nuttiness and yet you are now that very same conspiracy in reality!
Ms. Malkin I bow to your genius.
jenniebee
What? Oh, I was too busy imagining the next nine days, in which the Malkin gets bored, goes home, and gets a real job like the rest of us.
Ah, bliss…
tammanycall
No one’s paying attention to these yahoos but us.
Balconesfault
@Dennis-SGMM: Thank you!
Balconesfault
From Malkin:
Because nobody in the Limbaugh/Malkin/Coulter/Beck axis has compared Obama to Hitler.
Must be the work of an imposter.
NonyNony
@jcricket:
They have to use "Soros sponsored" because if they blame it on "the Joos" these days they get lumped in with the Stormfront guys and they don’t like that.
Sister Machine Gun of Mild Harmony
OH NOES! Them lie-bruls will make funs of us! How will we survives it?
/wingnut
aimai
"Pre-emptive Victimhood?" Reminds me that I was going to trademark the new Republican slogan:
Its the perfect rallying cry for the party of the snowflake baby, victimized by its own parents before it even has a chance to hit the eight cell division. *sniff* *sniff*. Majority Christians victimized by minority gays. And etc…
aimai
4tehlulz
That cop-killer in Pittsburgh was sponsored by
the ZOGGeorge Soros to embarrass Glenn Beck.harlana pepper
i realize this is highly redundant, but just knowing there are enough mentally sick people out there to keep a broad like this in business makes me sad for America. These aren’t the type of people who would consider treatment since they have no ability to self-reflect, but they need serious help. I long considered Malkin types to be media opportunists, pure and simple, but I’ve kinda changed my mind about that and believe most of them need to be institutionalized. I’d be happy to subsidize that since we need to get dangerously delusional people of influence like this out of circulation.
A Mom Anon
It’s sad. No one loves her enough to do an intervention.
harlana pepper
In addition, I recommend routinely administered "porkulus" enemas.
BruceFromOhio
So go ahead and beat up that journalist!
jcricket
Oh yeah, I remember they managed to work that one in there, though. Remember the line about Soros "somehow finding a way to survive the Holocaust" (code for collaborated with Nazis).
I do love the pre-emptive "Our revolution didn’t fail, it was sabotaged". Yes, sabotaged by having it conceived and run by morans (sic) .
smiley
Fox news is promoting four of these "tea parties" around the country with some of their "personalities" hosting (Hannity in Atlanta, Cavuto in Sacramento, Van Susterin [sp?] in D.C., and Beck in San Antonio [at the Alamo, natch]). So, they’re likely to draw fairly large crowds this time.
SpotWeld
Is it me, or is all this "tea party" stuff seem kinda namby-pamby for the average right-winger?
funluvn
When you have a care that a group named ACORN will send in their minions to fuck over your cucumber sandwiches and scones with clotted cream, your problem is much larger that your personal tax burden. Think of all of the rest of us that will have to pay for your insane ass when you get sent to the loony bin!
Svensker
What makes the Hottentot so hot?
What puts the "ape" in apricot?
What have they got that I ain’t got?
Courage!
h/t Dennis
cleek
you’d think a real grassroots movement wouldn’t need promotion from the MSM.
but hey, if the little babies want to take a Wednesday off from work and go play Galt with the Birthers and the Birchers, who am i to complian… at least they’ll be under police supervision.
Miriam
I’m confused. How in the world would we sabotage a Tea Party? Bring instant coffee?
dslak
@smiley: That’s rather interesting. It’s good when all your opponents decide to board the same leaking boat, all at once.
Arlie
Do these guys even know what ACORN does?
Dennis-SGMM
Soros and ACORN have to undermine the tea parties because they can’t afford to have millions of Americans galvanized by the sight of a handful of right wing closet cases with misspelled signs throwing teabags into a river.
dslak
@Arlie: You mean they do something besides try to destroy America?
John H. Farr
Well? Where’s MY steenking subsidy, dammit?!? Did I stand in the wrong line?
smiley
@smiley: I should have added that all of those locations make some sense to me except Atlanta. Georgia is a very conservative state but Atlanta is much more liberal than the rest of the state. The Alamo site is particularly rich because, on the one hand, it symbolizes the besieged attitude of the right while at the same time, it belies Beck’s "we surround them" catch phrase because, you know, the Mexican army literally surrounded the Alamo on their way to slaughtering everyone inside.
SnarkyShark
I am starting to get the sense Malkin and her ilk know the jig is up. The fantasy world is unsustainable because is is/will become too much work. Authoritarians are in equal parts mentally diseased/intellectually lazy. Beck is the Messiah for the crazies, Rush for the lazy.
While the Beck crowd will form the Tim McVeigh Black Helicopter brigades and continue to self immolate in little bursts of random gunfire, the other half will tire and lose focus.
The whole reason to outsource their critical thinking skills to the Oxy King(tm) waz because it waz easy. Trying to keep up with the plot, secret handshakes, and ever changing code word cheat sheet is getting hard.
They will lose interest, and resort to what they love best. Whiny victim-hood and hatred of DFHs. The only way Malkin and Co. can keep the fantasy world going is to appeal to some grandiose over the top plot where it is all going down now. And that cow can’t be milked much longer.
Unfortunately that will push a lot of the nuts way over the edge, but what can you do?
Of course the playbook says you have to preventativly cover your ass in this regard and the playbook must be followed.
Thus what Ejoiner said. All tied together with starburst colored wrapping paper.
Ed Drone
Do I detect the eaudeur of maneur?
Ed
Cris
Actually, when I saw that there’s going to be a little tea party in my town, I considered attending with signs decrying the enormous Pentagon budget.
But then I decided I couldn’t be bothered.
The Moar You Know
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY CHECK?
JL
Wasn’t John Kerry mocked for drinking tea? Sounds as though the GOP decided to join the elitist group.
If the local "tea baggers" in my area feel like they are paying taxes without representation, they need to vote their representative out of office. Since I live just north of Atlanta, that would be fine with me.
NobodySpecial
Perhaps we should ask our local police to block the streets so that people who refuse to pay for them can’t use them to get to their rallying point.
SpotWeld
So, this is Malkin basically admitting. "Sure the crazy racists will show up, but really they not our crzy racists.. really!"
Tsulagi
If there is only a 1% chance they could be victims, they will cry now. 9/11 changed everything. You can’t wait for the only warning that could come in form of a smoking NYT article about your lameness.
Cris
Sure, but then wasn’t Hillary mocked for doing shots?
If you’re a Democrat, you’re either an uppity elitist or a poser. If you’re a Republican, you can drink whatever you want. You should see all the Hummers with McCain/Palin stickers lined up at the espresso stands here in NWMT.
Edit: sorry, in the spirit of this thread, that should be poseur.
Scott H
Who wears sabots to a tea party?
Leelee for Obama
I am under the impression that liberals with money tend to say they didn’t ask for the tax cut, but thank the gummint for the extra ducats they can give to their favorite causes. Whereas, Real Americans invest theirs and then bitch about capital gains taxes. Have I missed anything?
They make me weary.
dmsilev
You’d think that they’d at least have the good taste to bring the river water up to a low boil before adding the tea.
-dms
Leelee for Obama
@dmsilev: That is already happening because of global warming, no?
Mary
My local DFA has been holding "Coffee for Progressives" meetings for a long time, but I bet they’ll get tossed up as an example of us liberals sabotaging their freedom of speech.
We are tossing around ideas for how to form our own publicity stunt.
I am thinking a community service campaign-it could reinforce the idea that they are the party of whiny, "no"people sipping tea while people are losing their jobs, homes and healthcare, and we would have an opportunity to give back to our city.
Anyone want to contribute an idea?
jnfr
Why the next nine days? What is the cosmic significance of the next nine days? When nine days are over, do we have to stop mocking them?
jake 4 that 1
Here are some of the signs that have alerted intrepid members of the Silent (but deadly) majority to the ACORN moles.
And here are some tea partiers.
Cris
Presumably, the tea party was scheduled to coincide with Pesach.
Comrade Kevin
@jnfr: April 15, Tax Day?
NonyNony
@Arlie:
Something about voter fraud. And forcing banks to give loans to shifty minorities who can’t pay them back. And they’re the backbone of Obama’s domestic Islamofascist Army that we’re all going to be conscripted into. And…
Oh you mean the REAL ACORN, not the thing they’ve invented in their heads. No – they have no fucking clue what ACORN does. But on the plus side, if they DID know they’d probably hate it anyway, since it involves helping poor people.
Shinobi
Soros better hurry it up because i’m not doing any sabeteuring without my grande cheque.
Phillip J. Birmingham
Ding ding ding! Anybody who looks like a right-wing nutcase must be an agent provocateur, because no actual crazies have right-wing views.
Evinfuilt
I got my Soros signed check this weekend to disrupt their protests. Didn’t all of you?
Anoniminous
I’m waiting for them to gather into Tea Parties and start singing ‘We Shall Overcome.’
Much hilarity will ensue.
srv
@Mary:
March out the homeless kids, holding signs "I have no countertops".
Another thing, have all the guys wear suits or slacks with ties.
Xanthippas
I don’t really know how that isn’t the same thing as saying "I’m going to paint myself to look like a clown and people will make fun of me for it, but that’s only further proof that you should take me seriously."
wasabi gasp
Getting folks to bitch about taxes on April 15th is about as significant as getting stoners to cough at 4:20.
D-Chance.
I gather this means the tea-bagging is failing, and Little Mitch is looking for a boogeyman to blame…
D-Chance.
BTW, get ready for a war on US soil… Obamamerica and Gates vs Congress (BOTH parties) and the US military industrial complex.
"Fair and Balanced" Dave
I live in Pittsburgh and I actually overheard someone in a store last weekend speculating that Poplawski, the right-wing loon who killed the 3 cops last weekend, was actually a left-wing "gun-hater". (Because, of course, all gun control advocates secretly keep AK-47’s and stockpile ammunition.)
I am constantly amazed at the sheer lunacy of wingnuts.
Balconesfault
@SnarkyShark:
I now have a new sig file.
Pasquinade
Tom Tomorrow gives us
Glenn Beck – with tears
teabaggers
"Moran" sign
http://www.salon.com/comics/tomo/2009/04/07/tomo/index.html
Jay C.
@Cris:
AHA! More proof of the sinister ZOG in action!!
Great – so like George W. Bush moved on from the principle of "preemptive war" re Iraq to that of "preventative war" by invading on specious grounds; can we expect that wingnuts like Michelle Malkin will graduate to "preventative victimhood" – and oppress themselves right off the air and out of print before George Soros gets around to it?
4tehlulz
Dammit. No one told me. I guess I’m not on the Elders of Zion’s LISTSERV anymore.
RememberNovember
They talk a good game, but end up not doing shite. Grassroots belongs in the progressive column, not the whiners column.
Remember Rush’s "operation chaos"?
These people couldn’t make a pot of tea, let alone boil water.
Leelee for Obama
"Tis a consummation devoutly to be wished…"
Sometimes, only Shakespeare will do.
cleek
i took the liberty of making them a time-off request form – already filled out!
Origuy
Soros doesn’t send out paper checks; everything’s done electronically. Email me your bank account information, including the ATM PIN, and I’ll see that you get on the list.
asiangrrlMN
@cleek: Hahahaha, I love your form. Made me laugh. Thank you.
By the way, I am a provocateur extraordinaire , and I DEMAND my cheque tout de suite!
Mais non! Zoot alors.
In addition, I want my tea back. It’s a fine, fine beverage that does not deserve to be maligned in this way.
That is all.
P.S. ACORN must be one powerful organization to do all it’s been accused of doing.
TenguPhule
Fixed.
TenguPhule
*Bam!*
Now they’re cooking with gas.
Moody Loner
@Cris:
I was going to show up and mock them, but unlike many good people in this Bush economy I have a job.
BruinKid
@Balconesfault:
Oh, then to help out Malkin, she should see this from a Kentucky gun show. T-shirts that directly compare Obama to Hitler, and which sold out pretty quickly too. Does she still want to deny it?
Tonal Crow
I love the smell of overcooked propaganda (with paranoid schizophrenia sauce) in the morning.
Balconesfault
@asiangrrlMN:
As they’ve apparently been given 5 billion dollars from the stimulus package, they have a lot to work with.
Pasquinade
"ticticboom": ACTIVE’s Guide To Demonstrations
http://patdollard.com/2009/04/actives-guide-to-demonstrations/
Pick out your favorite advice on:
Planning
Appearances
The Opposition
Liberals
Hippies ("Don’t be fooled by the Peace symbols, they are actually more likely to assault you than the typical protester.")
Marxists
Anarchists ("They won’t stand up and fight if there’s a chance they’ll get hurt but they’ll set your car on fire.")
Muslims ("These are the shock troops. If anyone’s going to try to kill you, it’d probably be a jihadi.")
Provocateurs ("His goal is to get you angry enough to kick his ass.")
Truthers ("Truthers can be hard to identify from a distance, but up close the glazed, empty stare is hard to miss.")
smiley
Edit: poorly thought out comment deleted. Anyone see it? No? I didn’t think so.
t4toby
Dude.
That’s not preemptive victimhood.
That’s the Reverse Double Malkin.
Bob Wahr
Our local teabaggers were planning to dump some tea in the river but had to severely limit their plans due to the fears that the local Fish and Game authorities would not be too keen on caffeinating the winter salmon run.
They were considering the somewhat less dramatic "lowering tea into a waiting boat" and "dumping tea (sealed in watertight containers and then retrieved by kayakers)".
http://www.redding.com/news/2009/mar/31/boston-tea-party-planned-for-sundial-bridge-on/
Heh indeedy.
Qualtrough
I am ready to help Michelle with tea bagging anytime!
Doug J
John Cole-
Inbred hilljack.
Doug J
Moderation at the Cole-world
You don’t have enough of Gleen’s cocksuckers already?
Grab some balls, W VA dude- or my Pittsburgh ass is gonna piss on you!
J.A.F. Rusty Shackleford
Get a brain! Morans
JohnR
Doggonit, I hate coming late to the party! Anyway, in response to 4tehlulz at #68 (you can’t see this, but I’m posting in my tux (as is my wont) and I hate being informal wearing formal attire):
You need to update your protocols.
Yours sincerely,
Torquemada
(insert Mel Brooks’ musical number here)
EriktheRed
Just wanna share:
http://forums.hannity.com/showthread.php?t=1417881
freedom fighter
we will be there to tell the truth ,90% of all americans taxes will go down under president obama’s plan . so come join us with the fight for the truth !!!! tea bagging sucks
His Pontiff Lick Monster
@Comrade Darkness: I hear you on that. I’ve had to apply for disability thanks to the "generosity of the free market". BWAHAHAHAHAHA *crying on the inside*…