Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

When do the post office & the dmv weigh in on the wuhan virus?

I’d try pessimism, but it probably wouldn’t work.

We are builders in a constant struggle with destroyers. let’s win this.

if you can’t see it, then you are useless in the fight to stop it.

“Jesus paying for the sins of everyone is an insult to those who paid for their own sins.”

Speaking of republicans, is there a way for a political party to declare intellectual bankruptcy?

Is it irresponsible to speculate? It is irresponsible not to.

Imperialist aggressors must be defeated, or the whole world loses.

The willow is too close to the house.

Their freedom requires your slavery.

When your entire life is steeped in white supremacy, equality feels like discrimination.

A sufficient plurality of insane, greedy people can tank any democratic system ever devised, apparently.

The worst democrat is better than the best republican.

The poor and middle-class pay taxes, the rich pay accountants, the wealthy pay politicians.

You can’t attract Republican voters. You can only out organize them.

In my day, never was longer.

Why is it so hard for them to condemn hate?

I know this must be bad for Joe Biden, I just don’t know how.

Balloon Juice has never been a refuge for the linguistically delicate.

The truth is, these are not very bright guys, and things got out of hand.

Republicans seem to think life begins at the candlelight dinner the night before.

And we’re all out of bubblegum.

Schmidt just says fuck it, opens a tea shop.

My years-long effort to drive family and friends away has really paid off this year.

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Islam, the Peaceful Religion. All

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Islam, the Peaceful Religion.

All of the subjects of inquiry for future terrorist acts are Arab.

This, no doubt, will lead to a dramatic increase in the shakedown of 60-something Irish women from Pennsylvania, 70-something Jewish blue-hairs from New Jersey, and 50-something hulking Norwegian farmers from North Dakota at airports around the nation.

No lawsuits have yet been filed by the ACLU or CAIR.

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