I’m sure it is surprising no one that this story is getting nowhere near the press that the WH party-crashers story has:
In a massive security breach, the Transportation Security Administration (TSA) inadvertently posted online its airport screening procedures manual, including some of the most closely guarded secrets regarding special rules for diplomats and CIA and law enforcement officers.
I really do not understand this country some times.
matoko_chan
Let me explain.
It is about sex.
If there was a dishy blonde with cleavage somehow involved there would be more coverage.
That is why a pre-trib ignoramus-dimbo and flaming demogogue is sucking all the air out of the GOP right now.
sex.
SpotWeld
Well, that just means you’re sober.
donovong
Well, CNN has had it all over their programs this morning. But, you have to wonder just how “secret” all this could be. Hundreds, if not thousands, of people know about this stuff. It was reportedly not classified.
We should let the dust settle before we decide that this is as important as Tiger Woods’ sex life.
Brian J
ACORN strikes again, it seems.
Hunter Gathers
It’s not that hard, really. It’s very simple.
We are a nation of sociopathic middle-aged adolecents.
Everybody understands we have big problems right now, but we don’t want to have to actually DO anything about it.
We like stupid distractions. We hate deficits, but will pitch a HUGE fit when it comes time to fix it. We demand that others fight our wars for us. We say we support equal rights for gays, then call them faggot behind thier back. We say we are post-racial, and then we get 2 weeks of Henry Louis Gates-Gate. We can’t decide whether or not torture is a good idea. We want policeman, firefighters, and teachers, but really don’t want to have to pay for them.
We hate Congress, but keep sending the same assholes back every election.
We, as a nation, no longer give a rat’s ass.
Jeff Gannon
The villagers, being authoritarians, are not in a hurry to embarrass the TSA, who is Keeping Amurika Safe.™
Plus, uppity black people do not run TSA.
The Grand Panjandrum
I don’t fly anymore because I refuse to be subjected to these ridiculous “security” measures. It was an overreaction to 9/11. It’s just stupid. More than 30 times the number of people killed on that day will die of seasonal influenza every year but I don’t see a War on Flu gearing up. It’s just idiotic.
chopper
damn you scott beauchamp!
chopper
@Brian J:
i knew it was acorn.
looking through, i don’t see ‘green balloons’ listed as a safe word when you’re being body-cavity-searched in a back room. i recommend they add that to the manual.
Punchy
Oh noez! The TSA’s Guide to Security Theater has been eckspozed! Cancel all flites! Hide your daughter from the darkies! Buy duct tape and plastic sheeting!
a different phil
Well, I hardly fly any more, but that’s more because the airlines treat passengers like cattle.
For entertainment value, you should read the TSA’s blog. Watching their passive-aggressive approach to the problem is amusing.
Belafon (formerly anonevent)
I saw it on the news this morning, but it was the local Fox affiliate, so I wonder how long it will be before it’s Obama’s fault.
Punchy
What in my above comment tripped the mod filter, may I ask? I’m serious.
meander
It’s also not too surprising that the Senate report about how Bush/Cheney let Bin Laden escape at Tora Bora disappeared into the ether so quickly. The report writers should have somehow tied a juicy scandal into the document — surely there must have been some hanky-panky going on with the warlords or people we were paying off.
And it’s also not surprising that the “don’t look backward” rule only seems to apply to real atrocities on the Bush year, not petty crap like the crashers.
JenJen
If we had photos of a hot blonde holding the manual, this story would be aces.
I see matoko_chan has already addressed this.
mk3872
True, John, but I’m sure the WaPo will still dig into the story of what diva and fashion wanna be Desiree Rogers is …
geg6
@The Grand Panjandrum:
Boy, do I agree. I have flown exactly once since 9/11 and that experience was enough to convince me that I’ve done enough long distance travel in my life that I can just stay local from here on in. The ex and I were taking his mother to Chicago to visit the brother and family. Ex’s mother was in a wheelchair. We were all pulled aside at security and ex and I were first searched in an open area where we had to unbutton our shirts, unbuckle our pants, and basically almost disrobe for all to see. Once we got dressed again, they then insisted on the same process for ex’s mother…the one in a wheelchair who couldn’t stand, was in the early stages of Altzheimers, and was 78 years old. It took so long that we were the very last people to board the plane. When we were catching our flight home, we ran into the same problems at O’Hare, even though his brother is the United terminal manager there. Apparently, little old senile ladies in wheelchairs and middle-aged yuppie-types are very dangerous terrorists. Also.
Col. Klink
I’m willing to bet the TSA code words to openly-publish were “green balloons”.
neill
if you think about what you’d like this country to be, and then you block out about 80% of that and make it instead a nice fluffy infantile stoopidity as described by one of the big heads on the teevee…then you get it…
that’s us…
whatta country!
Athenae
I swear for all the worrying that goes on about teenagers mis-using Teh Myspace to post they titties, more often than not the most egregious online fail comes from adults who work in some fashion or other for the government. Between Grassley & McCain’s Twitters and this kind of bullshit, I think there needs to be some kind of Internet driver’s license.
A.
GregB
Read what Col. Klink wrote.
-G
Bob In Pacifica
Hey Cole, how come you’re not talking about Tiger Woods? I think he poisoned his mother-in-law to keep her from talking about his wild drug-fueled parties with wild white women. I think that there may be abortions involved too. And some kind of communistic satanic stuff.
joeyess
I don’t understand this country either.
However, it does have one distinct character: That of a Tertiary syphilis patient.
It’s crazy, mean and terminal.
Omnes Omnibus
@joeyess:
If you read any history, you will see that the US has always had its share of crazies. Sometimes the crazies have louder voices than the noncrazies. We, as a country, have muddled through in the past. Maybe I subscribe too much to the Whiggish theory of history, but I think the general tenor of development has been positive over time. Setbacks? Sure, but talk of being terminal is a bit much. Buck up, kiddo.
Paris
I’m sure Lieberman will stop his grand standing and immediately convene hearings in the Senate since he is chairman of the Senate Committee on Homeland Security and Governmental Affairs.
or not.
cgp
@The Grand Panjandrum: Two colluding factors, drama and lots of money. (and it was New York. New York!!!! OMG!!!)
Persia
As others have said, TSA security theater is so ridiculous I’m not sure anyone takes it seriously any more. I had good luck when I flew this summer, but I’m well aware it was luck.
Drew
The TSA has no leadership…
Maybe if Jim Demint would allow Obama’s pick for TSA administrator to go through, this wouldn’t have happened?
Drew
satby
@Paris:
HAHAHAHA, stop.
You’re killing me.
SFAW
And maybe if Barack Hussein Osamabama’s pick for TSA administrator hadn’t been an uppity blackity-black commie Nazified Mooslim, DeMint would have let him through.
Or, as Paris would say, not.
RSA
In computer security, there’s a term used to describe a particular approach that seems relevant here: security through obscurity. By analogy, imagine that you’re trying to ensure that no one gets into a castle with a lot of doors. You install locks on some of the doors, but for others you just let the bushes grow up and hope no one discovers that they’re wide open. The contrast is to security by design, in which you can identify and take measures against attacks, even if the attackers know what you’re doing. For complex real-world security problems, I think it’s common to see a combination of these two approaches; it’s unfortunate but not really unexpected that the TSA seems to rely an enormous amount on the former.
a different phil
Don’t forget the third approach: Security Theater. That’s where you put on a show that makes it look secure, without actually having real security.
chrome agnomen
so where can we see the procedures manual?
mclaren
What security breach?
All 19 of the 9/11 hijackers had perfectly valid drivers licenses. Their ID was perfect and in order. They had no bombs or guns. And since so many people have shown how easy it is to sneak knives on board a plane, well, hell, the TSA is nothing but security theater. It accomplished nothing…other than reminding the individual American that they’re scum to be ground under by the boot heel of an increasingly authoritarian government.
Disband the TSA. Shut it down, it won’t make any difference. There will be no decrease in security whatsoever.
The single most important component of securiry in America is watchful Americans — the kind of alert airline passengers who tackled Richard Reed before he could set off his shoe bomb…a bomb the TSA (naturally!) failed to detect.
Violet
Just flew home from an international trip. Was randomly selected as I walked down the jetway to be pulled aside for yet another search. This one was pretty invasive. They took everything out of my carry on bags (and put it all back rather poorly, I might add – wankers), and then did a full pat-down of me, which has to be the most thorough and intrusive pat-down I’ve ever seen. I basically had to strip out of all my jacket, sweater, etc, and the female security officer checked everywhere – inside my pockets, the cuffs of my jeans, under my bra – no I’m not joking, the bottoms of my socks and inside my socks. It was all in full sight of all the other boarding passengers and made me feel like some sort of criminal. I was NOT a happy camper by the time that was over. Shouts of “f&cking terrorists, making us go through this” could be heard from me as I finally was allowed to touch my extremely jumbled up hand luggage and put on my clothes again. UGH.
Still felt like Security Theater to me.
gwangung
Republican-staffed, doncha know. It’s a feature of their ideology–they want to control information and think if they can do that, they can control behavior (see abstinence). Dead wrong, of course…
Gunner
This sort of thing erodes my confidence in the government’s ability to carry out intricate and complex conspiracies.
ellaesther
@Gunner: You win.
danimal
@Gunner: Fortunately, for the really good conspiracies, the government can contract out. Think Haliburton and all the money that disappeared into the Iraq sinkhole. Also ACORN.
Bnad
link to the procedures manual
Sour Kraut
@geg6:
Reminds me of when I flew out of New Hampshire in May of this year and watched some poor, beleaguered 80-something woman in a wheelchair get frisked by the TSA. They asked her to lean forward so they could poke around behind her and she kept telling them “I can’t.” Don’t know what deadly implement they thought could fit between her back and the chair. It went on like that for several minutes and I wanted so badly to yell at them to just leave her the frack alone, but didn’t really feel like having a Taser Sandwich and a cavity search.
Bubblegum Tate
@Gunner:
That’s exactly what THEY want you to think. Muahahahaha!
AngusTheGodOfMeat
I heard the TSA was using Word Press. They probably got so frustrated with it that they made some collossal mistake.
Heh.
Senyordave
The TSA has no leadership…
Maybe if Jim Demint would allow Obama’s pick for TSA administrator to go through, this wouldn’t have happened?
Even for a Republican senator, DeMint is bad. Can we transport Demint, Inhofe, and Cornyn back to the 19th century where they belong. I can see DeMint surveying his plantation, and talking about how slavery is good for all concerned.
Rick Taylor
Bread and circuses.
Evinfuilt
@mclaren:
You also forget to mention that his shoe bomb was only powerful enough to blow up his chair (and leave most of the chairs frame intact) and nothing more. Nowhere near the explosives to blow even a small hole in the plane, let alone large enough to take crash one.
edit: forgot to mention, even a small hole does nothing. There is no such thing as explosive decompression in airplanes. Our security theater is here to protect us from Hollywoods version of reality.
Brick Oven Bill
It is the lowering of standards to accommodate Obama’s America John. We also see this with the Secret Service screeners. I lived through the beginnings of this back when I got federal paychecks. You are forced to promote morons if they are of a certain birthright.
You will probably never see a picture of the TSA person who screwed this up. The fact that the image of the Secret Service screeners’ lady was released is another sign of how far standards have fallen. This image would have been kept secret by a competent Administration.
The reason you will probably never see the TSA person’s image is because the White House has learned from the leaking of the Secret Service screeners’ image.
Ed Drone
@Gunner:
Like 90% of climate scientists managing to simultaneously fudge their data, without ANYONE ‘catching on’ or noticing that the snows of Kilamanjaro are still in place, and the Antarctic ice sheets aren’t melting, and so forth? That kind of conspiracy?
Ed
ellaesther
Simply put – we like to have people at whom we can point and laugh, and whom we can condemn.
I don’t know if by “we” I mean “Americans” or “humans,” but I do think that this desire plays a very big role in the whole crashers story, as well as the Tiger Woods story, as well as about 75% of the rest of our approach to news, politics, and What Really Matters.
The Salahis are eminently mockable, and they keep providing more to mock; Tiger Woods was high and mighty, and now he has fallen. Oh, how we love to poke such figures with sticks.
Aside from anything else, a bureaucratic fuck-up such as the TSA story doesn’t give us the opportunity to say “My life may be messed up, but at least I’m not THAT bad.”
Sentient Puddle
@ellaesther:
It may just be because I haven’t been following Tiger much, but I really don’t get this one. Near as I can tell, he’s being brought down by rumors of having fifty mistresses. Which to me doesn’t make a damn bit of sense. Though yes, it does speak to the state of our society (all this assuming that I didn’t miss the story saying that he has banged fifty women while married).
Sour Kraut
Well, that was a shot at Jonah Goldberg out of nowhere.
ellaesther
@Sentient Puddle: I have followed it very little, though even that has been more than I wish I had. (Curse you, natural curiosity!)
My impression is that there are lots of rumors, but it’s fairly well established that a good chunk of them are true. Given the disparity between his above-the-fray, squeaky clean image, and the actual behavior (though my question would be: Why do we care who a golfer has sex with? What is wrong with us that Woods’ slutting around is of any interest to us whatsoever?), people just jumped on him with fangs and knives drawn.
Yuck. Once again, I wish I could bleach my brain a little!
mcc
This could just mean that even the Republicans/”villagers” realize the TSA doesn’t actually do anything
Brick Oven Bill
Jonah’s mom was Linda Tripp’s advisor, and then Jonah decided to go to an all-girl’s college. He was in the first class to admit men, according to Wikipedia.
Therefore, although Jonah was not my intended target, I can find nothing wrong with Sour Kraut’s Jonah-birthright argument.
Jonah is another example of the need for blind standards.
In a third example, meet Therrese Edmonds. RIP Therrese.
pcbedamned
That explains soooo much!!!
AngusTheGodOfMeat
@Brick Oven Bill:
Right. As if standards could be lowered after an administration that tried to convert the entire government and military of the United States into a Faith Based operation, hiring key people on the basis of their religious and political beliefs and trashing the subject expertise in critical government agencies.
Their greatest achievement was the Terror Thread Color Code, which remains at Yellow today after eight years of serving no purpose whatsoever.
pharniel
@ellaesther:
Because as LG$ said, being good at sports means you are a GOOD PERSON.
LG$ didn’t say it, but it’s a holdover from our Calvanist motherfucking cultural founders (I’m looking at you Quackers and Puritans) that says if you are successfull it’s a sign of gods love, and since god loves you you MUST be good, because god only loves good.
Thus when people who excel are actually egocentric OCD douchebags, the very same people who’d spend every. single. leaisure hour practicing something people get all upset.
Because the american dream is to be the ritch nice guy. It’s the same reason you get guys like joe the former plumber wanting to cut taxes for the ritch, because that could be me someday. Really. Honest.
Pleople use Celeberaties for their mary-sue fantasies in their head, and when it turns out that those people arn’t saints, well, expect the kind of scorn you get when you find out your favorite person in your spankbank isn’t down with your type of person.
Demo Woman
@mclaren: Richard Reed might not be a valid reason to dump the TSA since he was flying from Paris to the United States. Reed was arrested in 12/01 and the law that created the TSA was signed a month earlier.
Sentient Puddle
@ellaesther: Yeah, I hate following it too, and I think the only reason I pay it any attention is because it lets me marvel at the sheer stupidity of our country. See, my issue is this:
It seems to me that the only thing establishing the truth of these rumors…is the fact that so damn many people are buying into them. Fucking truthiness in action here.
I don’t know…that’s my attempt to interpret this whole thing as far away from a sex scandal as I can.
Martin
@pharniel:
No, marketing yourself as a good person means that people will see you as a good person. Tiger was set up by Nike and a million others as role model for young people to follow.
I don’t know the details behind this whole situation, and honestly I don’t care to, but when the perception that you are getting paid to put forward doesn’t match reality, neither Tiger nor anyone else should be surprised that the pitchforks and torches will come out.
Tiger personally signed off on his outward persona to the tune of hundreds of millions of dollars. That money came from consumers, fans, etc. A relationship (albeit a very fucked up one) was formed, and now a bunch of people feel jilted. If a sports star doesn’t want to be put in that position, nobody is forcing them to – they don’t need to do the endorsements, they don’t need to put out the posters, do the TV ads, and so on. Tiger could have spent his entire career playing golf and hanging out at home with the family, and he would have done just fine.
There’s no money for nothing, chicks for free.
Martin
@Brick Oven Bill:
What makes you think the college had any meaningful standards? Most single-sex colleges don’t. Hell, most small private colleges don’t. You pay your tuition and you rise to the academic challenge or you don’t. Most of them are relieved to just hit their numbers.
SFAW
Edited for accuracy.
Yeah, it’s all because they knew some darkie would get a job in Obama’s administration, that Bush/Cheney changed hiring criteria from “competence” to “Bush idolatry”.
If it turns out the TSA idiot(s) who posted the easily-un-redacted manual were hired between 2000 and 2009, it will surprise no one. Except BOB.
And we won’t bring up the 90+ previous Secret Service foul-ups, will we?
Brick Oven Bill
It was nice to know that Tiger was resting his head on a pillow, as he snored in the road. This must be why the judge denied the police officer’s breathalyzer subpoena.
I have never heard of a police officer having to go to a judge in order to be granted permission to administer a breathalyzer. This one I will have to remember, should the occasion arise. While it is enjoyable to have fun at Tiger’s expense, it speaks to something deeper. We now turn to the broad and growing appeal of Glenn Beck:
“If you break the law you pay the penalty. Justice is blind and no one is above it.”
Martin;
Jefferson failed in his college legislation. This is a shame.
SFAW
Unless you make frequent trips to the Dominican, to be a “nice uncle” to some adolescent boys, and you bring with you a suitcase full of them blue or purple pills.
Or perhaps if you go prescription shopping for OxyClinton or something that sounds like it.
Brick Oven Bill
Re: The Dominican Republic
Compare the widespread coverage of private Citizen Limbaugh’s legal as far as I know sex habits with the coverage of Charlie Rangel’s Dominican resort on which he did not pay taxes. Or Charlie’s multiple rent-control apartments which, I believe, he still maintains.
Charlie Rangel is an elected official, and is in charge of the Ways and Means committee. He maintains his chair under Nancy Pelosi.
“If you break the law you pay the penalty. Justice is blind and no one is above it.”
Kevin Phillips Bong
@mclaren: Former airline pilot here, let me add to mclaren’s post by saying that the 9/11 operation cleverly and effectively exploited two pieces of information that weren’t even really “weaknesses”. One: box-cutter type knives were not prohibited in carry-on luggage. Two: most major airline flight operations manuals at the time directed flight crews to cooperate with hijackers to ensure the largest number of passengers and crew survived any violence. Land the plane, disable it, allow law enforcement to do their thing. Nobody (in airline management anyway) predicted that hijackers would take the time to learn how to fly a modern airliner, then use the plane as a guided weapon. I’ll repeat what I’ve said before, a 9/11-style attack WILL NOT ever happen again, flight crews will not surrender the flight deck to anyone regardless of what they’re doing to passengers or crew. The primary concern of security professionals at airports should be preventing the boarding of explosives in large enough quantities to bring down the aircraft. This quantity is larger than one would expect. Current TSA procedures are predominantly of the Security Theater type.
asiangrrlMN
Eh, it’s not got the razzle-dazzle, you know. Plus, all the screening is stupid shit, anyway. I have to admit it amuses me to hear people bitch about it because pre-9/11, I got searched once every time I flew, anyway. Which, in those days, was quite often. I just built it into my schedule and resigned myself to be searched at least once each time I flew. Why me? I have no idea since I always dressed nicely and covered up my tats. So, after 9/11, the security measures didn’t affect me at all because I still got searched.
One guy was bitching about being searched (after 9/11) because while he supported ‘looking out for terrorists’, whatever that means, anyone could tell by looking at him (middle-aged white guy) that he wasn’t a terrorist. Heh.
The one that really annoys me is the ‘you can’t bring water from outside into the sacred area’ mandate because I always have a bottle of water when I travel. And, as with everything else, the airport jacks up the prices. Man, I hate flying.
Nellcote
@Brick Oven Bill:
And yet, Dick Cheney still walks free.
SFAW
Wrong again, Chuckles. He’s about as private as Ashton Kutcher, but only about half as smart.
Well, “as far as you know” isn’t saying much, now, is it? And pederasty may, in fact, be legal in the Dominican. But does it really matter?
Ah, but Charlie doesn’t go around shrieking about throwing the key away on drug addicts until he’s found to be one, now does he?
As usual, BOB FAIL.
Hob
@Brick Oven Bill:
“A certain birthright.” You know, I’ve worked in the public and private sectors and I’ve seen plenty of morons get promoted. Everyone understands this – even the morons, so I can’t give you much credit for noticing – especially since the “Obama’s America” and “birthright” crap makes it clear that your point is something different:
We’d better get used to low standards because Obama is hiring all those blackety blackety black black blacktacular black people, and they’re just not smart, because of… oh, let’s say genetics, because their ancestors did not evolve in the presence of metal detectors and Glenn Beck. Do I have that right, you smug little bigot?
Man, I really have to figure out how to get the pie filter working on this other computer. Scrolling past this shit is all well and good, but sometimes I forget and one of Bill’s little dingleberry specials hits me right in the eye.
Hob
@asiangrrlMN: Yikes, that sucks. I’d imagine that you’re still getting slowed down more these days though, because you have to wait in a much slower line while everyone else takes off their shoes and has their nose hairs examined, and then you get searched… no?
My favorite line in Bananas: