Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

A sufficient plurality of insane, greedy people can tank any democratic system ever devised, apparently.

When do we start airlifting the women and children out of Texas?

Not rolling over. fuck you, make me.

Republicans firmly believe having an abortion is a very personal, very private decision between a woman and J.D. Vance.

You’re just a puppy masquerading as an old coot.

This has so much WTF written all over it that it is hard to comprehend.

You don’t get rid of your umbrella while it’s still raining.

Books are my comfort food!

Fundamental belief of white supremacy: white people are presumed innocent, minorities are presumed guilty.

You are either for trump or for democracy. Pick one.

T R E 4 5 O N

Michigan is a great lesson for Dems everywhere: when you have power…use it!

Jesus, Mary, & Joseph how is that election even close?

Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

I’ve spoken to my cat about this, but it doesn’t seem to do any good.

We will not go quietly into the night; we will not vanish without a fight.

We are aware of all internet traditions.

This is dead girl, live boy, a goat, two wetsuits and a dildo territory.  oh, and pink furry handcuffs.

There is no right way to do the wrong thing.

If you still can’t see these things even now, maybe politics isn’t your forte and you should stop writing about it.

Not loving this new fraud based economy.

Text STOP to opt out of updates on war plans.

Narcissists are always shocked to discover other people have agency.

Putin must be throwing ketchup at the walls.

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Call for Volunteers

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Anyone out there with any cafepress/graphic skills? We really need to update the Balloon Juice store, which has been languishing for a while now. I thought about working on it in the past, but I would just get upset about Tunch and I am not creative in that way. I would like to update it though, and we need to start on the BJ Calendar for 2017. I will set up an email for pics later today.

I was thinking about adding a Team Walter line, with that picture of him smiling. Might be good for raising some money for MARC, our official charity.

Any thoughts/volunteers?

Reader Interactions

50Comments

  1. 1.

    martian

    Can more than one person contribute art, or does it make more sense to have one unifying vision?

    You just gave me an idea for a Walter image, but I don’t know if I have the graphic design chops for a whole store.

  2. 2.

    martian

    Do you have an art related tag? I think you should probably put that it’s about art in the post title and tags. I assumed this was programming related and was looking for a friend.

  5. 5.

    cosima

    I love the Team Walter idea. Zero computer skills to contribute. But I do have a lovely Labrador (Lola) and plenty of scenic Labrador-in-Scotland snaps that I could submit for inclusion…

  7. 7.

    beth

    i’m already committed for the 2017 calendar but i’m happy to do production on graphics if someone wants to take charge of project management and updating the cafe press site. team work, baby.

  10. 10.

    TaMara (HFG)

    @JOHNCOLE: Speaking of Walter, and knowing how much you LOVE new categories, I added a Walter category so that people could search for his story. I did this because your people demanded it. So don’t shoot the messenger. You might want to add it to any new Walter posts. xo

  11. 11.

    cmorenc

    FWIW John, some of us are still a bit upset about Tunch, too. We kind of adopted him as our own vicarious kitty, without the overhead of having to change the litter box.

  13. 13.

    debit

    @lurker dean: Or Walter wine foil sculptures. Of course, she’ll have to drink a lot of wine, but I would be willing to take one for the team and help her out.

  14. 14.

    The Very Reverend Crimson Fire of Compassion

    So, I got some graphics chops.. I specialize in wood-burning, though. Not everybody’s into that. For what it’s worth, my work’s been appraised (and sold) for 4 figure prices, but I’d be willing to donate for the cause. The artwork takes a while, so I’d need a window to complete it.

  15. 15.

    Punchy

    I can draw stick figures like nobody’s bid’nass. Also, too, elephants with crayons. If you need either of these, I’m game.

  16. 16.

    Betty Cracker

    @WaterGirl: You’re kind to say so, but I really don’t have good graphics skills, at least for this kind of project. That said, if Cole needs crappy Photoshopping or middle school-level cartoon illustrations, I’m certainly willing to help! ;-)

  17. 17.

    CONGRATULATIONS!

    FWIW John, some of us are still a bit upset about Tunch, too.

    @cmorenc: Thirded. That was a gutpunch. Out of grief and rage, I would probably kill any animal who hurt/killed one of mine, but hopefully I’d heed John’s example instead, because it wouldn’t help anything.

  18. 18.

    The Very Reverend Crimson Fire of Compassion

    @CONGRATULATIONS!: Yeah, that was one of Mr. Cole’s Bodhisattva moments. One of several I’ve witnessed (and learned from) on this blog.

  21. 21.

    joeyess

    An unflattering photo of Mark Halperin with the tag-line “Our Failed Media Experiment Personified”.

  25. 25.

    geg6

    I have absolutely no talents in these areas other than to say we definitely need a Walter line of swag. And a new calendar. There was much complaining at my house that there is no Balloon Juice calendar this year.

  27. 27.

    Pogonip

    How about a Walter calendar? January is one of his less shocking skinny pictures, then he heals through the year and in December you see him happy in his new home.

  29. 29.

    MazeDancer

    If someone volunteers to be in charge – as in be Creative, Strategic, and Organization Chief of entire project – happy to help some. Like help clarify strategy. Or be assigned to design one product line.

    Advertising, strategy, product launch, and design are all parts of my consulting biz. I get daily enjoyment from BJ. Can give back a little.

    First give back: Strategy First. All successful projects start with a great Strategy. No Strategy, No Excellence.

    Need to decide end goal – Make more money for MARC? Underwrite more site expenses? Have more fun? Make a more compelling unified BJ look? Enhance BJ Community Spirit? Create opportunity for a larger BJ Creative Advisory Board? Need to know exactly what you’d like to have happen. Not being specific tends to result in less greatness.

    (Also, just MHO, Zazzle has nicer products. Better tote bags. Many made in America. But many have happy times with Cafe Presse)

  32. 32.

    Exurban Mom

    John, I know this is off topic, but can we maybe pull together a fundraiser for Imani Gandy? Spaniel Day Lewis had to have surgery after a put bull attack that also sent Imani to the hospital.

  33. 33.

    ruemara

    If you can select an illustration of Walter from the pool, getting it up on cafe press is easy. For the calendar, you just need the right layout. I was thinking of doing one for Christmas, so I’m going to see what templates my usual vendors have.

  36. 36.

    martian

    @Betty Cracker: I think your line drawings would actually make fantastic t-shirts.

    @Exurban Mom: Oh, how awful! I haven’t kept up with her continuing adventures – is there news on her blog?

    Seems odd to say about a cat I never scritched in person, but I miss Tunch, too. That was a sad, sad day.

  37. 37.

    Hilfy

    The Tunch apron I bought a couple years ago is wearing like iron, except the Tunch picture has worn away. I’d love something with Walter’s smiling face…maybe a coffee mug?

  39. 39.

    Exurban Mom

    @martian: Yes, both she and the pup are going to be okay. Imani was treated and released from the hospital. Broken finger, some other wounds. Doggie is still at vet’s, will need/is having surgery. I follow Imani on Twitter, that’s how I heard the story. You can follow her on @angryblacklady. Gotta say I’m sick of pit bulls out in public. The breed is so erratic–you can think you have the dog fully trained…..

  41. 41.

    JR in WV

    @The Very Reverend Crimson Fire of Compassion:

    Ya know, you could do a fancy wood-burned piece of art, and then sell instant repros of Walter and Tunch for John’s shop. Using a digital image it could be resized onto cups, tee shirts, dropped on a calendar, etc, etc. With the main real art work auctioned off at the end of the season.

    Just thinkin’ out loud.

  43. 43.

    martian

    @Exurban Mom: Thank you. I’m not on the tweeter, but I think I can google them using her handle. That sounds like a bad attack. We had one happen, but not as bad. The owner was letting the little bastard off leash, “He’s never done anything like this before!” Fortunately, my elderly little mutt had the smarts to stay on his back after being bowled over and bite into the pit’s chest and neck. Bought my husband enough time to rescue him and the young pit apparently did not have a taste for human. My poor little guy had painful, stiff joints for a couple weeks after, though, after that adrenaline fueled exertion.

  48. 48.

    Zoey2020

    I have a background in writing and editing but also am an artist with some limited Photoshop experience. My last job in Corporate America was managing editor for a publication that went to an audience of 100K. Needless to say, I am in no hurry to replicate that experience. But for Tunch and for Walter, sign me up to help!

  50. 50.

    Aardvark Cheeselog

    Betty Cracker recently posted a pic of one of her dogs, a headshot posterized on a red background, with a filename that suggested it was supposed to be like a Che Guevara portrait. The problem was that the dog was looking right at the camera, when she needed to be staring off into the distance at the future of socialism (or maybe a faraway squirrel).

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