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You are here: Home / Open Threads / Cats and Dogs Living Together Open Thread

Cats and Dogs Living Together Open Thread

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Jake/Elvis strikes again. This poor cat, who wants nothing more than to just hang by himself or snuggle with me..but all the girls just love him. LOL (Remember his duck groupies?)

I’m off to Home Depot to buy a new toilet. Another exciting Saturday night.  I’ve had request for a writing group thread tomorrow.  I don’t have any guests to post, but I may throw up a thread anyway (same chat time/same chat place).

I hear the Women’s March was a BFD today in many cities, I had many friends at the LA march (and probably a few in Denver, too). It is so inspiring and I thank each and every one who marches.

I was going to post recipes tonight, but never got around to writing any today, but am making fajitas tonight using JeffreyW’s fajita spice recipe (here)

What’s going on in your world tonight? Open thread!

Reader Interactions

65Comments

  2. 2.

    debit

    Scout giving him the side eye is so cute.

    I’m building a couple of wheels and rewatching the Vikes/Saints game. Yeah, go ahead and mock. That was the best game of my life.

  3. 3.

    Libby's Person

    What a good puppy, and what a tolerant cat! The snow melted enough for me to go to the Women’s March Anniverary Rally in Raleigh NC today with several thousand other nice people, and I get to spend tomorrow having fun with my older dog at a nosework competition. (It’s a fun pet version of what drug and bomb sniffing dogs do, with titles and ribbons. Libby will get roast beef every time she finds one of the hidden odor tins, so she’s going to be very happy!). All in all, one of the best weekends I’ve had in a while. I’m trying not to think beyond that right now.

  4. 4.

    JMG

    Just finished salmon with a mustard-dill sauce and a reasonable chardonnay. Doing nothing, resting up for playoff games tomorrow.

  5. 5.

    Elmo

    Flu. Started Thursday. Yesterday I tried all manner of meds to control the cough and alleviate the body aches.

    So today I have the worst case of NSAID-induced gastritis I’ve ever experienced. The heartburn and nausea go beautifully with the hacking cough.

  8. 8.

    SiubhanDuinne

    I’m off to Home Depot to buy a new toilet. Another exciting Saturday night.

    ?? Another Saturday night and I ain’t got no toilet,
    I got a plumber, he can clear my drain.
    Now how I wish I had someone to flush me,
    I’m in a lot of pain. ??

  11. 11.

    Starfish

    I was at the Denver March. I saw some people with a Great Dane there and wondered if it was you. I guess it wasn’t.

  14. 14.

    HumboldtBlue

    What do you do when #metoo hits home, not just hits home but comes inside, smiles, accepts a drink and sits down?

    What do you do when you learn you brother sexually molested your niece for four years?

    What do you do when you learn your sweet, beautiful niece with whom you shared innumerable moments together as she sprouted from an infant to a vibrant little girl with a smile so sweet it could melt glaciers and who is now a mother in her own right, has collapsed under the burden of emotional, physical and psychological trauma?

    What the fuck do you do?

  15. 15.

    NotMax

    to buy a new toilet

    Shame one cannot test the products the way one does when shopping for a mattress.

    :)

  16. 16.

    SiubhanDuinne

    @HumboldtBlue:

    Oh, dear gods, I do not know the answer, but I hope at some point your anguish and that of your beautiful niece may be restored by some measure of peace and serenity. But how to get there I do not know. Much love and light during this excruciating journey.

  21. 21.

    scav

    @HumboldtBlue: Golly. All I can think is first a profound boggle and a stiff drink (or equivalent). But then, I’d say listen to her and find if there are any ways she’d like and benefit from your more active help. Same for her mother who I would guess is possibly also in a state worse even than yours. Ouch ouch ouch. Good luck to everyone.

  25. 25.

    lamh36

    @HumboldtBlue: as others have already said…listen to your niece, comfort and support her…scream and rage when you are alone, but with your niece…support and love and trust in copious amounts!

  26. 26.

    MomSense

    @HumboldtBlue:

    I’m so sorry. I have no doubt you will do your best to support your niece. Please go talk to a therapist who specializes in this so you can get the support you need and so you can learn how to be the best support for your niece. All the family dynamics and history are going to be amplified and you may find some guidance helpful.

    I also want to encourage you to be really careful while the shock and grief is acute. Sometimes we feel drawn to coping mechanisms that cause more problems.

    Sending you support.

  27. 27.

    lamh36

    Go Tammy…go…

    I am absolutely sure this is truly what Tammy wanted to say bout Chump for a while, but I think this is ALL strategic…Tammy directly calling out Chump…practically daring him to respond inapproprately…and let’s see John Kelly… try to wrangle Chump from responding.

    This is Sen Duckworth directly tweeted Chump…

    @SenDuckworth
    I will not be lectured about what our military needs by a five-deferment draft dodger
    https://twitter.com/SenDuckworth/status/954872169774841857

  28. 28.

    Mnemosyne

    @HumboldtBlue:

    IMO, the first thing to say is, “I’m so sorry I didn’t know.” And then just listen. Your first instinct will be to try and fix it by, say, beating the shit out of your brother, but don’t do it. It will only make things worse for her, because she doesn’t want to have to deal with everyone else’s feelings of guilt while she’s still sorting through her own feelings.

    Just listen to her and support her without letting your own feelings of rage and guilt get in the way of helping her.

  30. 30.

    debbie

    @SiubhanDuinne:

    Only because I’ve used so many words so many times about this.

    Speaking of assholes:

    Beautiful weather all over our great country, a perfect day for all Women to March. Get out there now to celebrate the historic milestones and unprecedented economic success and wealth creation that has taken place over the last 12 months. Lowest female unemployment in 18 years!— Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) January 20, 2018

    The fucking nerve.

  31. 31.

    Mnemosyne

    I’ll probably be late to the writing thread tomorrow because I have an RWA meeting that same morning — and after I made a special request of TaMara, too! ?

  36. 36.

    Corner Stone

    @Elmo: My ex says she doesn’t have the freakin’ flu and isn’t contagious. I’m thinking about calling in Dustin Hoffman and Rene Russo to go rescue my kid.

  37. 37.

    frosty

    @HumboldtBlue: What an awful blow. I don’t have any advice but I see some other Juicers have helped. Do your best to support your niece however you can. We’ll all be thinking of you.

  38. 38.

    satby

    @SiubhanDuinne: Actually, I join Tamara in living on the edge, except that I made the mistake of ordering my new toilet online from Home Depot and though that was a week ago it hasn’t arrived at the store yet. Coming to Indiana from Ohio, evidently by ox cart.
    If they aren’t here in Monday, I’m cancelling the order and going to Lowe’s because I have a handyman coming Tuesday to install them. Before I leave Wednesday. Stressss!

  42. 42.

    Gravenstone

    @debbie: It’s good that he’s thinking* about female employment – since there are likely to be a large number of new female employees soon. In legislatures across the nation, at all levels.

  43. 43.

    Barbara

    @HumboldtBlue: I think you have to let your niece know that she can count you on her side and willing to support her in any way you can. I am so sorry. Life should not be that cruel.

  49. 49.

    debbie

    @Corner Stone:

    I’ve had three packages arrive via UPS in the last four months that have been heavily damaged. I don’t know what is going on with them.

  51. 51.

    Denali

    @HumboldtBlue,

    So sorry. Your niece is fortunate that you are there for her. You might seek a therapist for her.

  52. 52.

    satby

    @Corner Stone: it has because I ship stuff all over the country, but there is no point in Ohio that is a nine day journey from South Bend, IN. And they have the same weather, so that isn’t an excuse.
    Edited to add: they ship from a Home Depot distribution center to a Home Depot store, it isn’t given to a third party like UPS. Where delays might logically be expected.

  53. 53.

    Shana

    Just heard godawful hissing and caterwauling coming from the basement. Immediate thought was, “good god, what critter got in our basement that the cat is going after?” Turns out it was a cat outside. Sheesh Kivrin, the cat’s not in the house and you are. Give it up.

  55. 55.

    ruemara

    @HumboldtBlue: You hold her up, be there for her and keep that man out of her life until the grave claims him. I’m sorry. There’s nothing that can shatter a family quite like these revelations. And remember, your anger and pain is valid, but it’s not something you need to share with her. It makes abuse survivors feel like they’ve put pain and suffering on to you. But right now, she needs to know you love her.

  57. 57.

    debit

    @Corner Stone: Nope. I was sure it was going to be another typical Vikings heartbreaker, but in the end we pulled it off. I usually feel bad for teams that lose, but Sean Peyton makes me want to drink Saints tears.

  58. 58.

    debit

    @HumboldtBlue: I can’t imagine how you’re feeling right now. Everyone else gave you great advice, so I’ll just add: be kind to yourself and open to whatever she needs from you, even if it’s nothing right now. You can’t fix anything, you can only deal with it going forward. {{{}}}

  63. 63.

    Ohio Mom

    @HumboldtBlue: You consult with a mental health professional specializing in helping abuse victims so that you can learn the best ways to be supportive to your niece. Sometimes what we think is the right thing to say, isn’t.

    I suspect you will also need support for yourself because there is going to be a lot of upheaval in your extended family. This is going to keep unfolding for a very long time, it is going to be a slog.

    It is beyond unsettling to find out someone you thought you knew and trusted, you didn’t really know, and that your trust was completely undeserved. It is an earthquake.

    ETA: what Momsense said at 26.

  64. 64.

    HumboldtBlue

    Thank you all for your kind words and useful advice and your decency.

    The shock is still on me, the unanswered questions, guilt over initial skepticism at her claims (my sister and I spoke about that aspect as well because she wanted to be 100% sure before she broke the news to the family), anger that it happened in places WHERE I WAS FUCKING PRESENT, sadness that he was most likely a victim himself (FUCK THE MOTHERFUCKING CATHOLIC CHURCH), confusion, a deep sense of shame, utterly aghast at the details, disgusted at the breach of trust and the abuse of family love.

    I can’t imagine her hurt, her pain, the burden so unfairly placed on her, so fucking angry at the betrayal by a man, who when I was a boy (he’s almost 10 years older), was a guide, a role model, an awesome, kind, patient older brother. That he betrayed my sister (with whom I am very close we being the youngest two in a large clan) and looked upon my niece as a target, as prey is still nearly unimaginable and yet for all my anger the overwhelming sadness is the worst.

    We are a close clan, we regularly get together, we engage in family text threads (him included recently) on a near daily basis and although we are separated by distance and spread across the country, we share what we can of our lives with each other. I had that child in my care every day for three summers, some of the fondest memories I have are of with her and her brother as we went swimming while waiting for mom and dad to come home from work. Every holiday, birthday, big game and just a regular old Tuesday I was at their place being an uncle. And then this started.

    No clue. No signs. Not even a whiff of suspicion.

    Fuck.

  65. 65.

    Ohio Mom

    @HumboldtBlue: One of my thoughts upon reading your first comment was, “Wonder who abused BIL when he was a lad?”

    Take heart that your big, loving family is going to be where the chain of abuse stops.

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