Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

Republicans in disarray!

Only Democrats have agency, apparently.

It’s time for the GOP to dust off that post-2012 autopsy, completely ignore it, and light the party on fire again.

This fight is for everything.

John Fetterman: Too Manly for Pennsylvania.  Paid for by the Oz for Senator campaign.

Yeah, with this crowd one never knows.

And now I have baud making fun of me. this day can’t get worse.

Republicans are the party of chaos and catastrophe.

Make the republican party small enough to drown in a bathtub.

That’s my take and I am available for criticism at this time.

“More of this”, i said to the dog.

If you’re pissed about Biden’s speech, he was talking about you.

We still have time to mess this up!

Accountability, motherfuckers.

Come on, man.

Roe isn’t about choice, it’s about freedom.

They traffic in fear. it is their only currency. if we are fearful, they are winning.

When do we start airlifting the women and children out of Texas?

Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

Proof that we need a blogger ethics panel.

Americans barely caring about Afghanistan is so last month.

You don’t get to peddle hatred on saturday and offer condolences on sunday.

Since when do we limit our critiques to things we could do better ourselves?

Fuck these fucking interesting times.

You are here: Home / Music / Not Sure How Much This Helps, But…

Not Sure How Much This Helps, But…

by | 178 Comments

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As the Confederate statues tumble, shining a light on the weaponization of memory in Lost Cause viciousness, the Dixie Chicks have had a think.

Having thought, they’ve decided that their old name is too freighted to remain.

So now, they’re The Chicks.

Which, for this old coot, is not all that much easier to say.

But hey–they’re good people and fine musicians, so, as an afternoon treat, have some Chicks (w. James Taylor):

Can you guess why I picked that one?

Open thread–and if I have to pick a theme, share with us the best band names you ever heard, invented, or managed to “improve” from an existing group.

My contribution? I always wanted to create, see, hear a biology-themed combo named Mighty Chondria and the Organelles.

 

 

 

Reader Interactions

178Comments

  2. 2.

    Kropacetic

    @raven: I once had a softball team in my league called “Nine Jerks and a Squirt”!

    I hope they got their…over-eagerness problem under control.

  7. 7.

    Barney

    From before the TV character:
    Max Headroom and the Car Parks

    Cliff Rescue and the Helicopters

    Wally Jumblatt and His Blues Militia

    and my favourite:
    Bill Harzia and the Malarial Swamp Dogs

  10. 10.

    Keith P.

    I want to say I first heard about “John Cougar Concentration Camp” on this site via a similar thread.

  12. 12.

    debbie

    I hope the Chicks are well-girded for all the backlash that’s heading their way.

  14. 14.

    Geminid

    I always thought “The Dead Sea Squirrels” would be a good name for an alt-klezmer band. Shtetl metal.

  15. 15.

    raven

    @Keith P.: Buddy of mine was the catcher on Mellencamps little league team in Seymour, Indiana. I  remember when he opened for the Kinks in Champaign and disliked the Cougar thing even then.

  16. 16.

    Nicole

    There’s no word yet on when The Chicks next album will drop, due to Natalie Maines’ divorce- her ex is trying to block it, because he fears a lot of it is about him.

    Judging from the one song released from it, he’s probably right.

    I’m not much of a country fan, but I really liked Taking the Long Way (the whole album) and I like this song. Angry (previously Dixie) Chicks are always the best Chicks.

  18. 18.

    RandomMonster

    Tribute bands can have pretty great names:

    • Chum (a Phish tribute band)
    • Björn Again (an Abba tribute band)
  20. 20.

    TheOtherHank

    M. C. 900 Foot Jesus

    Heedless Youth Speeding Through Life With the Throttle Wide Open

    God’s Favorite Band

    Urban Rhino

  21. 21.

    The Moar You Know

    Eighties punk band from Oklahoma:  The Oklahomos.

    That took some courage back then.

    My punk band’s name back in the 90s:  The Fleshmissiles.

  22. 22.

    Nicole

    @debbie:

    I hope the Chicks are well-girded for all the backlash that’s heading their way.

    They’ll be fine.  It won’t be their first right-wing nutjob rodeo.

  24. 24.

    SiubhanDuinne

    a biology-themed combo named Mighty Chondria and the Organelles.

    You been hanging out with NotMax?

  25. 25.

    Martin

    @debbie: Nah. That’s played out. Lady Antebellum seemed to change their name with minimal backlash.

    When you’ve lost NASCAR, you’ve lost the culture war. The hangers on will be few but heavily armed.

  28. 28.

    Baquist

    My contribution? I always wanted to create, see, hear a biology-themed combo named Mighty Chondria and the Organelles.

    Here to power the Revolution!!

  30. 30.

    Immanentize

    My son, my BiL and I play this game all the time. I have a running list of band names and album names. My son, the Immp, has insisted on one hard rule to making band names — no adjective plus noun combinations allowed. Too much low hanging fruit in that combo, he says. And it’s true!

    Current favorite band:
    Cobra Pope
    And their punk country album:
    Ball Moss and Bagworms

  31. 31.

    Mom Says I*m Handsome

    Back in the Usenet days of the Interwebs I harvested a list of hundreds of putatively “real” band names.  My very favoritest was “Jif and the Choosy Mothers.”  Props also to “Jesus Chrysler Supercar” and “JFKFC.”

     

    Of my own invention I’m particular to “Bukkake Family Picnic”.

  32. 32.

    HumboldtBlue

    Man City down to 10 men Chelsea lead 2-1 and Liverpool 20 minutes from Premier League title.

  33. 33.

    S. Cerevisiae

    My major professor told us about his band in grad school on Long Island: Chemicals Made Of Dirt.

  37. 37.

    NotMax

    Muzak band: There’s Always Room For Mellow.

    Trivia: Actor David McCallum’s father was the leader (first violin) of Montovani’s orchestra.

  38. 38.

    jd

    My funk band would be Infectious Waste

    My country band would be Red Rectum & his Bad Ass Cowwboys

  40. 40.

    MattF

    I think The Chicks (née Dixie) are great and I’m so pleased to see them back in business. Turns out they’ve teamed up with Taylor Swift (ex-country herself) who admires them greatly. Which improves my opinion of Taylor Swift.

  41. 41.

    James E Powell

    @Nicole:

    Judging from the one song released from it, he’s probably right.

    One assumes everyone involved knows exactly what this refers to and it must have been pretty bad.

    Cause, boy, you know exactly what you did on my boat
    And, boy, that’s exactly why you ain’t comin’ home
    Save your tired stories for your new someone else
    ‘Cause they’re lie-lie-lie-lie-lies

  42. 42.

    RobertB

    Dread Zeppelin – Reggae Led Zeppelin cover band with lead vocals by an Elvis impersonator.  _Black Dog_ was a very minor hit for them

    And I’ve forgot all the calculus I ever learned, but I do remember hearing Root Boy Slim’s _Dare to be Fat_ in DC.

  44. 44.

    Delk

    Well, fuck. I have Addison’s Disease and take hydrocortisone to treat it. I have about 4 days left and have been trying to get more. The manufacturer is out. If I do not take it my blood pressure will crash. Bad.
    Google tells me it is being used in COVID-19 trials. I have 4 days left because I have been skipping one dose. My blood pressure is currently 94/57.

  47. 47.

    cleek

    “When People Were Shorter And Lived Near The Water”

    “Victim’s Family”

    “The Miami Relatives” (from the Elian Gonzalez era)

  48. 48.

    geg6

    @Nicole:
    I read somewhere that he’s pissed that she has stayed successful and made more $$ than him and he has become a has-been.  Apparently, he wants big alimony and child support.

  49. 49.

    WaterGirl

    @Delk: Fuck.

    What does your doctor say

    edit: this may be a dumb question, and sounds awful, but these are desperate times.

    My sister’s dog had addison’s disease and they gave pills to their dog.  Might a vet have some?

  57. 57.

    Tom Levenson

    @Delk: Yikes.

    Thoughts your way.

    Not to offer advice I’m not qualified to give, and that you’ll have thought of anyway, but maybe a call to your senators’ office might get someone trying to shake some loose? Weird times.

  58. 58.

    Mike in Pasadena

    In Rostock, Germany, formerly a part of East Germany, they have a hometown band named, Les Bumms Boys.

    No, there’s no detectable gay affect in the members of the band.

  59. 59.

    JPL

    Yesterday I mentioned that if Biden wins by a lot, that I want him to play the Chicks rendition of Landslide.    Of course he is classier than I so probably wont’t .

  60. 60.

    trnc

    OT: Another winning entry from CNBC: It’s a “Biden is coming for your tax cut” story without any mention that the tax cut mostly went to wealthy corporations who used it for stock buybacks.

    Ooh, there’s a chart:

    Looking at data going back to 1951, Bank of America found that when the White House flipped from Republican to Democrat the S&P 500 underperformed over the following three months compared with when a Republican replaced a Democrat in the Oval Office.

    Except the chart doesn’t actually show that, nor is there any context, eg, Obama inherited a plummeting economy. I also love how it shows an order of 1 Day, 1 month, 1 week, 1 year, 3 mo, 6 mo.

    Argh!

  61. 61.

    Le Comte de Monte Cristo, fka Edmund Dantes

    @Mom Says I*m Handsome:

    Lawrence Welk: “We have one of the new style bands a’here t’night, Bukkake Family Picnic. They’re so much fun, and really make you shake. A’one’a and a’two’a…..”

  62. 62.

    Nicole

    @geg6: It’s really crazy- he wants the pre-nup invalidated because she’s made more $$ than he has, but also wants the pre-nup upheld because it says something about them not releasing personal details about each other.

    I don’t think Mr. Pasdar can have it both ways.  And I like the new song and I’m annoyed I have to wait for more new songs.

  65. 65.

    Le Comte de Monte Cristo, fka Edmund Dantes

    @trnc:

    Saw that this morning. Pippa is a reliable purveyor of that sort of shit shallow thought.

  69. 69.

    Haroldo

    Way back when in grad school (plasma physics), our intramural touch football team (in the ‘B’ division) was called the “Grad B Drifts.”

  70. 70.

    laura

    Roadie brother the younger is tight Tight TIGHT with The Chicks – those gals are road tested to push back on the hate and good on ‘em for controlling they professional and personal lives.

    my Santa Rosa friends had a band called the stupid white people and could no longer countenance the irony after 2016. Now they are clusterfolk. Coincidentally there’s a guy here in Sacramento who lives just around the corner and his band has been playing porch concerts every couple of weeks for the neighborhood – they are clusterfunk.

  71. 71.

    trollhattan

    @trnc:

    Yeah, when Obama took the pilot’s chair the economic airplane was plunging thousands of feet per minute. Jerb #1 is pull it out of the dive before the ground has something to say about things. All else is meaningless.

    But McCain did pause his campaign to go talk about the economy, so we’ll always have that.

  72. 72.

    Martin

    @RandomMonster: Yeah, I agree – pun or GTFO.

    Lez Zeppelin (all female band) might be my favorite for straight  up cover band. No Way Sis honorable mention.

    Mash-up cover bands are quite enjoyable, though. Gabba (Abba songs in Ramones style), and Dread Zeppelin (Elvis impersonator fronting reggae Zep covers) are notable. There’s also a heavy metal Abba cover band called Abbatoir.

    I will confess to having some kawaii metal in my music collection – I do enjoy absurd fusion of musical styles, well implemented.

  73. 73.

    Citizen Alan

    @RandomMonster:

    Björn Again (an Abba tribute band)

    Was that for real?!? I thought it was just a joke from the movie “And God Spoke” (an unbelievably funny and underappreciated film).

  77. 77.

    trollhattan

    @HumboldtBlue:

    Heh, Amir can pretend to get drunk in celebration! Congrats, ya uberfan.

    Three of our NBA team players have tested positive for the rona. IDK how indoor sports can be made safe.

  79. 79.

    Amir Khalid

    @Amir Khalid:

    Okay, that didn’t happen this time. Chelsea hang on to win 2-1, and Liverpool’s three-decade title drought is over. There’s still seven matchdays to go, and I’m still praying no one gets Covid-19.

  80. 80.

    MattF

    @trnc: Yeah. And, btw, that ‘tax cut’ was a tax increase for a lot of blue staters. And, btw, non-billionaires really didn’t do all that well with that tax cut. And, for the record, yeah, taxes are going to have to be fixed…

  84. 84.

    trollhattan

    @Martin:

    Dread Zeppelin are my alltime favorite send-up tribute band. The stage act was a hoot and they have the chops to pull it off. Reggae-style Zep lead by Elvis. It’s just so obvious. A sample.

    Anecdotally, Robert Plant is a fan.

  85. 85.

    Geoduck

    My personal favorite is one I read in a magazine decades ago, Billy Clone and the Same. They were evidently a short-lived punk group in the early 80s.

  94. 94.

    cleek

    Hayseed Dixie is my favorite bluegrass AC/DC cover band.

    Scrantonicity is my favorite Scranton-based Police cover band. (yes, i know)

  95. 95.

    Raven

    @Tom Levenson: yea, she works so hard on those and they take forever. People see them and want to know how much it would be to make one of their critter and she just shakes her head.

  96. 96.

    TheOtherHank

    Black Clothes and Pointy Shoes

    And an actual lots of airplay band: Toad the Wet Sprocket. Which had to have been a drunken mishearing of their actual name.

  99. 99.

    Misswhatsis

    Underemployed Dominatrix and the Smart Whips is the name of my new blues band.

  101. 101.

    James E Powell

    @TheOtherHank:

    Toad the Wet Sprocket. Which had to have been a drunken mishearing of their actual name.

    Their name is from a Monty Python skit.

  105. 105.

    SiubhanDuinne

    @NotMax:

    Trivia: Actor David McCallum’s father was the leader (first violin) of Montovani’s orchestra.

    Amazingly, I knew that! In fact, I knew it about 55 years ago, and it’s stuck with me ever since.

    Speaking of David McCallum, did you ever see Mother Love (PBS/ Masterpiece Theatre or Mystery!, maybe 30-ish years ago)? The mother in question was a tightly-wrapped, exceedingly sinister Diana Rigg. Really creepy three-parter. For some reason, it’s never been made available on DVD or any kind of home video. I’d give a lot to watch it again.

    ETA: McCallum plays Rigg’s ex-husband.

    ETAA: Changed Riggs to Rigg.

  106. 106.

    NotMax

    @Gin & Tonic
    IIRC, in what was long known from beforehand as the meat packing district.

    Also too, there was another watering hole called Ramrod.

  112. 112.

    snoey

    @TheOtherHank: per the usual stories:

    Donna the Buffalo were Dawn of the Buffalo but gave up on being introduced correctly when alcohol was involved.

    God Street Wine were something even dumber that they won’t admit to.

  114. 114.

    Gin & Tonic

    @NotMax: Yes, there were many such, um, suggestive names. Mineshaft, Ramrod, Hellfire, and my fave, Crisco Disco.

  115. 115.

    Ohio Mom

    Somewhat off topic, growing up deep in the Bronx, the only use of the word “Dixie” I ever heard was in the name of paper cups. It was one of those inexplicable brand names.

    It wasn’t until fifth grade and a music unit on American folk songs that I learned that Dixie was a land people wished they were in.

  117. 117.

    kindness

    I like the Dixie Chicks.  Have seen them several times.  Own a few of their discs.  I’m all in on taking out Confederate stuff as they are losers, but for a northern boy I never thought ‘dixie’ meant confederacy.  I always assumed it was another term for the South.  So their name never really offended me.  Not like the folks waving the Stars & Bars at Lynyrd Skynyrd do and I loved them (the band, not the god damned confederates waving their traitor rags).

  122. 122.

    kmeyerthelurker

    For a while in the Denver area there was a punk band called the Hate Fuck Trio.

     

    Best one I ever came up with was Methyl Ethel & the Ketones.

  123. 123.

    GrannyMC

    Blackjacks > Quarrymen > Beatals > Silver Beetles > Silver Beatles > The Beatles

  124. 124.

    senyordave

    @RandomMonster: 
    Björn Again (an Abba tribute band)

    I don’t know why this popped into my head but there exists on Youtube a video of ABBA doing “Midnight Special”. I can’t imagine a more unlikely band to do the song “Midnight Special” than ABBA, and the results are predictable, but I give them a pass because I believe it was from a charitable event they were part of. But somewhere up above Lead Belly must have shed a tear when he heard ABBA’s version. Here is a link, and it is actually worse than I remembered it:
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AV7oUq1BpT0

  125. 125.

    NotMax

    Oh proofreaders, where have you gone?

    Just now eyeballed on Prime a blurb about a 1950s B-movie noir that includes “the plot revolves around an elicit affair.”

  126. 126.

    Kent

    When I told my 17 year old daughter the story of the 2003 “cancellation” of the Dixie Chicks and all the completely insane convulsion of hatred complete with radio stations driving bulldozers over their records and shit.  All because they mildly dissed President Bush.  She does’t believe me.  It’s hard for the youths to understand how crazy 2001 – 2004 really was.

  127. 127.

    VeniceRiley

    Aquabats?
    I’m ignoring the Man City game today.  makes the almost-spouse grumpy, that result. But we’re going to win everything else!

  128. 128.

    Tony Jay

    @HumboldtBlue:

    That’s title number 19 in the bag! Champions! Champions! Champions!

    Now for 100+ points to take that record too, followed by a solid rebuild for next year’s defence of the title and run at at least a Domestic/Champions League Double. Odd as it sounds title 19 won’t be as important as title 20 (matching Man Utd) and title 20 will pale against title 21, when we go back ahead of them.

    Lots to do, but we got this far in style!

  129. 129.

    lowcountryboil

    Back in the day when I was at UGA, there was a cool retro band called The Jody Grind.  My memory is that before that band name, they called themselves “An Evening with the Garbageman.”

    Also, when Peter Buck (r.e.m.) and his good friend Kevn Kinney (Drivin’ n’ Cryin’) played a gig at the 40 Watt, they played under the pseudonym “Oedipus Longfellow and Petey Wheatstraw.”

  133. 133.

    satby

    @NotMax: They had both Manhole and Double A Meatpackers leather bars in Chicago during the 90s.

    After my divorce my friends liked to take me out to cheer me up. Me, the cis-het mommy, at leather bars. As long as I didn’t have to pee it was all good.

  134. 134.

    Kent

    @kindness:I like the Dixie Chicks.  Have seen them several times.  Own a few of their discs.  I’m all in on taking out Confederate stuff as they are losers, but for a northern boy I never thought ‘dixie’ meant confederacy.  I always assumed it was another term for the South.  So their name never really offended me.  Not like the folks waving the Stars & Bars at Lynyrd Skynyrd do and I loved them (the band, not the god damned confederates waving their traitor rags).

    Well, it comes from (or was popularized by) the 1859 civil war minstrel song “Dixie” that more or less became the Confederate national anthem and marching song.  And it was a favorite sung by black face minstrel performers before and after the war:

    I wish I was in the land of cotton,
    Old times there are not forgotten;
    Look away!  Look away!  Look away!  Dixie Land.
    In Dixie’s Land where I was born in,
    Early on one frosty mornin,
    Look away!  Look away!  Look away!  Dixie Land.
    I wish I was in Dixie, Hooray!  Hooray!
    In Dixie’s Land I’ll take my stand
    to live and die in Dixie.
    Away, away, away down south in Dixie.
    Away, away, away down south in Dixie.

  135. 135.

    Tony Jay

    The Devil’s Hairbrush were the winners of the 1992 Battle of the Bands when I was at Uni, and yes, I was high as a kite when picked the name.

    Though if it had been a punk band it would have been ‘Spray for Pay‘

  139. 139.

    Delk

    @satby: Double A Meat Market. I used to live around the corner from there. It was a butcher shop before it was a bar. I used to shop there. The bar was a lot of fun, especially with Touché (the other leather bar at the time) right down the street.

  142. 142.

    debbie

    @Delk:

    Doctors have samples. Ask your doctor and ask him/her to check around.

    (I’ve had to do this back when I was uninsured.)

  146. 146.

    trnc

    @MattF: 

    Yeah. And, btw, that ‘tax cut’ was a tax increase for a lot of blue staters.

    And military families. And probably a lot of other people who didn’t expect the leopards to eat their faces.

  148. 148.

    Amir Khalid

    Unfortunately, BBC and The Guardian are reporting that “thousands” of Liverpool fans are gathered outside Anfield to celebrate. Go home! Do your celebrating there!

  151. 151.

    lowcountryboil

    @raven:

    I was there in the early-90’s, and Panic had graduated to the Georgia Theater by then.  I saw them once and had no idea they would become so, well, widespread.

    I knew about Hindu Love Gods as well, but didn’t know they recorded in Normaltown.  I did get to see almost-r.e.m. (Buck, Mills, and Berry, but no Stipe) play here in Portland a couple of years ago at a benefit gig for Scott McCaughey.  I even got to chat with Peter Buck for a few minutes that night!  Great guy, and I was able to tell him my story of almost getting into the 40 Watt the night r.e.m. debuted “Losing My Religion” (the club reached capacity when I was 5 people away from getting in).

  152. 152.

    Tony Jay

    @raven:

    At University, yes.  At Hospital, no. It would be in Hospital or at the Hospital.

    God, Uni was more than half my life ago, but it seems like last year. I guess that’s because I’m so incredibly immature.

  153. 153.

    debbie

    @Delk:

    Good. Hope you hear soon. Then, when you do get your refill, ask the pharmacist to allow you to get your next refill sooner than whatever they’re allowing now. That way, it’ll be okay if it takes a few days longer.

  157. 157.

    Tony Jay

    @Amir Khalid:

    Petri-dish pricks.

    That said, the BBC and The fucking Guardian can shove their reporting up their ‘independent, non-partisan’ arses. Complicit bullshitters with the souls of slime-eels.

    Ahhhhh, good to get that off my chest. #readyfortwenty

  158. 158.

    Miss Bianca

    @kmeyerthelurker: Before our band The Bitter Pills became The Bitter Pills, we were toying with the idea of calling ourselves “Cliff Ledge and Over the Edge” (Cliff Ledge being the alter-ego of my ex, who was the band leader. Yours Truly was Paisley Velour, stoned-out bass player/chick singer. Really a stretch for my thespianical/musicianly chops, I’ll tell ya!)

  161. 161.

    Tony Jay

    @raven:

    They actually had college back then? I thought it was all Guild Apprenticeships or heading off to the untamed frontier in your day.

    But then, I have been drinking.

  162. 162.

    kmeyerthelurker

    @Miss Bianca: Funny, I was also frequently a stoned bassist/backup singer.  Some other names we toyed with are comin back to me now as I dwell on those days….

    Chaps No Pants

    Reno Shavedown

    The Piss Shivers

    Ah those were the days.  Sometimes anyways.

  166. 166.

    Haydnseek

    Way late here, but the Fox chyron for Laura Ingraham was Man Bun Maoists.  Why didn’t I think of that?

  167. 167.

    Martin

    Oh, I really need to throw in a mention for fictitious Sex Bob-Omb.

    I just adore that movie (never read the comic). Probably need to have participated in the video game discussion the other day to pull it all together.

  168. 168.

    Geminid

    @Kent: Dixie was written by a man from Illinois for a musical revue shortly before the Civil War. The writer took some flak during the ear for having written the song that became a Confederate anthem. But in the few days  between Appomattox and his assassination, Lincoln attended an outdoor concert and the question came up of whether Dixie should be played. Lincoln said go ahead, it’s Union property now.

  170. 170.

    Quaker in a Basement

    Best “improvement,” real life: Stone Temple Pilots, formerly known as Shirley Temple’s P***y.

    Recently came across a duo with a good name: The Farmer and Adele.

  172. 172.

    Ascap_scab

    Prime Directive Violation

    40oz of Courage

    Hold My Beer

    Sperm Bank Nightnare

    Bloody English Twits

  173. 173.

    different-church-lady

    This is significant, because basically what they’re saying is that the entirety of the south is too corrupted to keep association with.

  174. 174.

    KrakenJack

    @satby: Must have been a franchise – there was a Manhole in Baltimore in the late 70’s. There was also a Fagan’s. In case that was too subtle, their neon sign was in two colors.

  177. 177.

    JWR

    @The Moar You Know: My punk band’s name back in the 90s: The Fleshmissiles.

    Ha ha! Reminds me of some friends after me, (guitar) and the bassist split away to form another band, which we called “Short Circuit”.

    But the band in question called themselves “The Pink Tools”, which was shortened to “The Tools” after they found that some clubs were too highbrow to have “The Pink Tools” on their marquee and fliers.

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